And now, the end is near;

And so I face the final curtain,

My friend, I'll say it clear,

I'll state my case, of which I'm certain.

I've lived a life that's full,

I've traveled each and every highway;

And more, much more than this,

I did it my way.

This is where I tell you that my time in the Peace Corps has ended. In about 10 hours, I'll be on a plane from Bishkek to Istanbul, then to Chicago, before arriving in Seattle nearly 30 hours later.

There's not a single statement, story, or anecdote that I can write that could tie up my Peace Corps experience. It was long, short, easy, difficult, tiring, energizing, disappointing, amazing. Life in the Peace Corps really is just a microcosm of day-to-day life anywhere else in the world, but intensified 8597 times.

Enjoy the other parts of the internet, friends and enemies.

The previous design got a few laughs from friends, but don't worry about it - it was just a joke to throw off the girls. Since the camp is just 5 days away now, I can reveal the real design:

And here's our certificate:

That's Sly, Ahnold, The Duke, and The Dragon from left to right.

I'd pat you all on the back if I could. Man Camp is fully funded thanks to you, you, and, especially, you. Your contributions will certainly go to a good cause and I hope that I was able to thank every one of you that donated. If not, leave me a curse word-laced message.

Once we got down to $19, I figured we had it in the bag, but I still checked every morning until our headquarters emailed me with the results. Funding was big part of the entire process, but it's just one hurdle in a long race; we still have lots of work to do. I'm worrying too much - how hard can it be to bring 55 fourteen year old boys to a remote location, keep them under control for a week, then return them all safely to their homes all over the country (most of them nearly 14 hours away)?

Pictures of Man Camp in the near future, but, in the mean time, thanks all around to YOU.

Pandas are cute. Laughing babies are cute. Changing the link to our project without telling anyone is not cute.

Relevance: The geniuses in charge of the Peace Corps' website decided to restructure the donation section, but instead of making a complicated website more user-friendly, the new site is now littered with sub-menu after sub-menu. Their objective is to get more anonymous donors to donate to the worldwide Peace Corps fund or to a random project, but it severely hampers friends and family from easily locating their volunteers' specific projects.

How about an email or phone call letting us know that our old links send possible donors to an error page? Why, that would be too much work, Sean Thompson; we have paperwork to staple and run-arounds to give. ...I won't rant, but the inefficiency of it all is ridiculous.

But, speaking of efficiency, you guys are awesome! We're down to $1184 left and things are definitely looking good. Once again, thank you for your continued support of Man Camp. Let's get that last bit of money so we can do our work here on the ground.

Oh, and here's the new link to the Peace Corps donation website:

Click here to donate to MAN CAMP.

There's only one thing that I think of these days: funding for Man Camp. It consumes my every thought, making it impossible to think about other things: school's good, the weather's warm, I'm reading a good book.

We need $2959. That means we've received a total of $2375. Once we hit $2667, the halfway mark, then I'll rest a little easier. Actually, no I won't; I'll probably just get even more antsy as we get closer to the $0 mark. The numbers are always bouncing around in my head, so much so that I use them in class activities now:

"Mark went to the store. At the store he bought 2375 eggs."

"2375?!"

"Yes. Mark was very hungry, so he drove home at 2959 kph."

"What!"

The project members, you met them last post, and I keep in touch via periodic emails. Since I have the most readily available email access, I keep up on the numbers game more than them. I update them with the most recent numbers about once a week, most of the time like this:

The numbers game is so all-encompassing these days that I pay attention to other volunteers' projects (in other countries!). Some of the ideas are awesome, here are a few of my favorites: a butcher shop in Togo, a baseball league in Moldova, and chicken raising in South Africa. But, hands down, my favorite project is this MASSIVE project in Vanuatu for windmill power. The project total is $289,548! The guy's asking for $24,794, a fraction of the overall cost, but still...! Isn't it a great idea? It almost out-MAN's the Man in Man Camp. How cool is that? I almost feel like changing our camp to be a weather balloon project or an ark just to compete.

Once again, thanks for your continued donations to our camp. You're helping those you've never met, but the project will be a rousing success - one that I anticipate positively affecting these boys' lives. We're going to have a watermelon eating contest!

Oh, and if we get funded quickly enough, let's toss some cash at that guy in Vanuatu as well.

We had a meeting in Toktogul to discuss Man Camp stuff.

Basically it boiled down to delegating responsibility to team members for certain tasks we need to accomplish before the camp in June. There's a lot of details that need to be addressed before then, and this is made difficult by the distance between each of us. We met in Toktogul primarily because it is central to all of us. It took me 10 hours on a bus to get there.

We've been talking about Man Camp ever since our PST, so it's a strange feeling to watch the camp slowly shift from idea to reality. It won't be exactly as we originally imagined it, but we're working hard to make it close. Dancing bears, elephant races, and a dunk-tank with pirahhnas are just not going to happen unfortunately.

The ideas are rolling in at a good clip though, so I'm confident in the camp's success. Honestly, the most difficult part so far was sending out that mass email asking for money. I believe that Man Camp will be a special event, but it's difficult to convery its importance, its potential, to folks in words that sift out to say, "We need money!" We're down to $3644 left (out of $5334). My greatest fear is that we'll get down to a few hundred dollars left and the money flow will dry up. I hate asking for money.

By the way, don't forget the website: link to Peace Corps donation site.

I've got expensive tastes, but I'm not too interested in being rich. That sounds awfully idealistic. I guess what I'm saying is that in my future, I want enough money to be able to be on the donating end, not the receiving end. The ability to give before another has a chance to ask would be immensely satisfying.

Let's conclude with a few pictures. Two pictures from Toktogul, and a mini-introduction to the guys heading up Man Camp (minus Matt Grandmason - no picture!).

Lookout point at Toktogul.

On the way back from the lake.

Phil Johnson. "Turn on High School Musical again!"

Charlie Moyer. "He tried to get with that. The Egg."

Rick Gotwald. "I like my girls like I like my tea. ...Puerto Rican."

Sean Thompson. "Should've taken the cab."

Next time: the ladies helping Man Camp.

Thanks for your continued donations!

Hello, hello friends and enemies!

This is not the most important email you'll receive this year, this week, or even today, but I'd appreciate it if you'd read it in its entirety before deleting it. After all, I hate mass emails just as much as you.

My time as a Peace Corps volunteer in Kyrgyzstan is coming to a close soon - it's still surprising to me how quickly time has past here. That's not to say I'm busy 24/7 though: a few nights ago, I spent three hours trying to build a card house. I couldn't even make one level. Guess my future in architecture is not in the cards. So to speak.

If you follow my mess of a blog, you'll know a little about my final project here in Central Asia. Along with four other volunteers, I have been planning a Boys' Leadership Camp to be held in the middle of June. I'll first explain my thought process in coming up with the camp: recognize a situation (what?), assess the problems (why?), and derive solutions (how?):

Situation - Young men in Kyrgyzstan graduate from secondary school without plans for their futures.

Problems - Lack of direction, role models, and confidence.

Solution - Boys' Leadership Camp.

As it is a Central Asian nation, Kyrgyzstan suffers from a hierarchal gender system where men are treated above women. It's a cultural issue that they are slowly changing (remember, less than 100 years ago, the States had the same problem - to some extent, it still exists today). Past groups of volunteers recognized this problem and offered numerous programs to young women in the country in hopes of building their confidence and expanding their vision for what a modern woman in Kyrgyzstan can be. Unfortunately, several generations of volunteers neglected the young mens' role, instead catering only to girls.

This is where Boys' Leadership Camp comes in. From June 11-15, we will be hosting 50 young men from grades 7-9 (ages 12-15) from all over Kyrgyzstan for a week of sessions and activities that seek to educate young Kyrgyz men about their roles in society and possibilities for their futures. Each day will focus on a different theme: one for health, one for career planning, one for how to act around women. Encompassing all of these themes will be our central focus on leadership, and how a young man should carry himself - with pride, confidence, and optimism for his future. Guest speakers have been handpicked from Peace Corps, schools, and NGOs to provide the boys with fantastic role models to look up to. Sessions will be held in Kyrgyz and Russian to eliminate possible language barriers and provide 100% understanding of the message.

Let's call Boys' Leadership Camp, Man Camp. After all, it's about becoming men. Man Camp will not focus solely on sessions; instead, we are looking to create an American-style summer camp. Sporting activities like basketball, soccer, football, wiffle ball, and relay races will be held every day with a huge, round robin-style tournament held the final day. We hope to foster a sense of teamwork and competition between each cabin of 10 boys. Each cabin of boys will come up with their own team names and cheers - hopefully something like, "Team Bruce Lee" or "Team Arnold Schwarzenegger" or "Team Jean Claude Van Damme." Manly. And no, we won't be playing volleyball at Man Camp. Volleyball is for girls.

Jokes aside, my four volunteer co-planners and I have put in a lot of time and work into Boys' Leadership Camp and it's an extremely important project to us. As is Peace Corps policy, we were required to obtain a certain percentage of the camp's funding from local sources. This aspect of the camp has been fulfilled. The Rotary Club branch in Bishkek offered to fund part of the camp after reviewing our budget. In turn, we agreed to bring 5 orphans from a local orphanage to the camp. All class, baby.

Now comes the difficult part of this email. For Peace Corps Partnership grants, a large percentage of the total budget must be provided by outside sources. These sources usually include friends, family, corporations, and the Trix Rabbit. Our total budget for the camp is $7713 USD. The percentage required through the PCPP grant is $5334 USD. Peace Corps has posted a link:

http://www.peacecorps.gov/index.cfm?shell=resources.donors.projdetail&projdesc=307-076

...on its website where you can go and donate funds to Boys' Leadership Camp. I'm not asking for $5334 from one person - remember, this is a five man project, so if my end can pull down 1/5 of the funds, we'd be in good shape.

You all know me, so you know it's not in my nature to ask for money. But I believe this is a great project, one that will change the lives of these 55 young men. An event like Boys' Leadership Camp will stay with these boys for their entire lives. Any contribution will help enormously whether it's $2, $5, or $10. I'm laughing as I write this because I realize all of my friends are young, broke, just-out-of-college folks haha. But seriously, anything helps, guys and gals. If you're can't donate at all, think about passing on this message to those who are in position to help.

Thanks for reading, and please check out the link if you have time. If anyone would like a copy of the budget in order to corroborate prices ("$5000?! Where's the money going??"), please ask, and I'd be happy to forward it to you.

Take care, and see you all soon.

Now you know,

Sean

ps - If you do donate, please send me an email telling me so. I would like to thank you in person (donations on the Peace Corps website are all anonymous in terms of donater and amount).

I'm back from Upper Jalalabad. Here's some pictures of a train, Lenin statue, and ylak (nation game played on horseback with a goat carcass).

They sell logs of processed meat here called "kahlbasa." It's basically sausage. I used to buy the chicken logs because I figured that they would be healthier than the mutton or beef ones, but every time I ate some, I would get sick for a few days afterword. This was before I thought to buy a frying pan (EGGS!), so my thought process preempted any other thoughts aside from: kahlbasa = sausage = meat = better than bread and potatoes. So, I killed tons of these sausages over the past year and a half, ignorant of the sickness they caused.

I stopped buying them for a few months, but went to the bazaar yesterday and bought a log. As I walked away, the vendor yelled to me to, "Don't forget to cook it first."

What?

I walked backwards back to the stall and asked for clarification. The old lady looked at me with a weird look on her face and said, "The kahlbasa. That type is supposed to be fried or boiled first. If you eat it raw, you'll get sick."

It tastes better fried too. Gosh.

My mom's going to hate this story.

It Snowed Again Two weeks ago, I had to roll up my dress shirt sleeves because it was so warm. Today, I had to toss on my ICE AGE gear just to walk to the store. The weather fluctuations in Kyrgyzstan are the most ridiculous I’ve ever seen – and I used to live in Kansas. My students think it’s because of global warming, but they also think that Moscow is the biggest city in the world. Animals Again My kids like animals. I mean, they’re eighth graders, so of course they like animals. Now, they want to argue with me about which is faster: pigs or cows. Obviously it’s pigs. Obviously they chose cows. After the whole elephant fiasco, I think they just like to screw around with my knowledge of the natural world. Come on. I used to be a Biology major, son! We’ll ignore the fact that I bombed so many science courses I had to switch to History. Boys The boys in my classes complain that I like the girls better than them. I don’t argue with them about that. It’s easier to make the choice when you imagine having all boys or all girls in one class. One class of boys throwing everything in reach at each other, wrestling, and asking me if I like 50 Cent versus one class of girls paying attention and telling me that I’m awesome? Easy. Hey, I like to be complimented too. Man Camp But I’m making it up to the boys. We just submitted our Peace Corps Partnership grant proposal for a Boys’ Leadership Camp in June, so hopefully we’ll have the grant online pretty soon here. It’s going to be great. Trust me. We’re going to have some great guest speakers come in to talk to the boys about leadership, career planning, healthy lifestyles, and how a young man should act towards women. In our early notes, we titled that last one, “Hit other boys, not girls.” 55 Boys Running Around There are 5 of us heading up the Man Camp project. We’ll each bring 10 students from our schools to the camp. In addition, we’re bringing 5 orphans from the capital to the camp. We’re classy like that. I’m not exactly sure which 10 boys I’m going to bring. I’ll probably have them arm-wrestle. Everyone Knows It’s funny, nobody wants to help work with pounding out the grant, budget, or materials for the camp, but all these volunteers want to come to Man Camp. I’m not a mean guy, but I keep it short with my answer: “No.” I like to play, but I’m taking this project pretty seriously. It’s game face all day when Man Camp prep is on tap. Man Camp will be fun, but it will not be a party for volunteers. One volunteer talked excitedly about how she was going to come to the camp and bring her mom as well. Her mom. I won’t even begin. Those K14s K14s want to come to Man Camp too. This is great actually because I want two of them to come, observe, and then carrying on the project again next year. But, like I said, I will not allow volunteers who see this as a party to come. After rejecting a few K14s who wanted to come to Man Camp, they pouted and told me they were starting their own “Man Camp” on the lake next year. That’s fine. Just stop hijacking our name. But They Won’t Stop Crying I offered to give all our materials to these K14s seeking to start their own Boys’ Leadership Camp next year, but I was turned down. Instead, they criticized our camp behind our backs as if this were some sort of competition. What more can I say? Peace Corps, baby. Peace Corps. This Blog It’s been about a month since I wrote anything here. I ran out of interesting stuff to say. I actually read a lot of Peace Corps volunteers’ blogs. Honestly, they’re boring. Maybe it’s because I’ve been here for a year and a half, but reading about cows, chickens, sheep, and culture clashes between host families and volunteers stopped being funny about a year ago. I reread my blog too. Lots of whining. By Sean Thompson I think I tried to be too much like a writer early on. Eloquence and overly verbose passages are great for fine literature, but not for a Peace Corps blog. Blogs are fun for practicing writing techniques, but too many people want to be Faulkner, when they’d be better off imitating Hemingway. Or just not writing blogs. It’s Sunny Outside Now It wouldn’t be right to end on a sour note. I used my salary from school to buy new basketballs for the school recently. In honor of March Madness, I’m planning to throw challenges to all secondary schools in Osh for a basketball tournament to be held later next month. We’ll have two boys’ and two girls’ teams so that all ages and skill levels can participate.It’s the homestretch in my Peace Corps service now. Strange how quickly time has passed.

My favorite website is Wikipedia. It’s my boredom killer, always ready to present a topic for me to learn each day. Sometimes it’s something useful, but most of the time, I learn about useless things like raccoons. Did you know that there’s such a thing as a crab-eating raccoon?

Today was definitely a “learning” day on Wikipedia as I learned about official state mottos of countries around the world. Here’s a few of my favorites: Austria: none. But, formerly AEIOU, standing for Austriae est imperare orbi universo. That’s Latin for, “It’s Austria’s destiny to rule the world.” Understandable during Leopold I’s reign, but when you have to sue France for peace (even against Napoleon), then it’s time for a new motto. Austria-Hungary: Indivisibiliter ac Inseparabiliter. Once again, Latin for, "Indivisible and inseparable.” New motto, same irony. Botswana: Pula. In Tswana, that simply means, “Rain.” No jokes this time, just facts: Home to the Kalahari Desert, Botswana definitely needs rain, but with the world’s lowest life expectancy at 35 years (AIDS epidemic), it’s definitely in need of more than just water. Luxembourg: Mir wëlle bleiwe, wat mir sin. In Luxembourgeois, "We want to stay what we are.” In a small sampling of Peace Corps volunteers in Osh, 0% could correctly identify Luxembourg on a map, so the Grandy Duchy is safe for now. Switzerland: Unus pro omnibus, omnes pro uno. Latin for, "One for all, all for one.” But, but, but except in war! Or decision making of any type. And I thought the Three Musketeers were French? North Korea: 강성대국. That reads, “Prosperous and great country.” See what I mean? I don’t even need to attach punch-lines for these to be funny. That’s all for today, friends and enemies.

This week I taught my students how to use "can" properly. One exercise had us writing sentences about what nouns can do what actions, and my example was, "Elephants can't swim." My students exploded into cries of disagreement, claiming that elephants could swim (they had seen it on TV), and that I was wrong. We argued. We don't really have a teacher-students relationship; when we disagree, we argue. Anyway, they argued that I was wrong, and I argued that they didn't even know what an elephant was in English.

So I went home and Googled, "Can elephants swim?" eager to prove them wrong the next day. Turns out, elephants are awesome swimmers: their bodies are buoyant, they use all four legs to propel themselves along, and their trunk as a snorkel. All mammals, except for humans and apes, are born with the innate ability to swim. Elephants once swam from the southern tip of India to Sri Lanka!

The next day, my students were waiting outside the classroom, faces betraying their eagerness for me to admit I was wrong.

"Elephants are extinct. And skeletons can't swim."

Fat chance, kiddos!

When I returned here, to Kyrgyzstan, it felt like I hadn't left at all. In fact, it was just my changing mindset from that in America to one in Central Asia. Crosswalks became useless again, the idea of set prices became a pipe dream, long johns became a second skin, and livestock impeding traffic was once again normal.

As was doing cartwheels with an eight year old on New Year's.

Andy - 28 years old.

Jana - 8 years old.

Sean - 23 years old.

I received an envelope full of letters today. They were from middle school students in America, curious about what Peace Corps life is all about. Here's a few quotes taken from their letters:

"Are you into football? I love the Redskins, I think they are a great football team."

"I have three brothers named Peter, Matthew, and Luke."

"Do you have any friends? Do you have a best friend? In America, we are allowed to like anyone of our choosing. We are not forced to worship or praise a master or a God. So what's going on in your country?"

"Finally, I need to know why you joined the Peace Corps. Was it free will? Did someone make you?"

"I want to know what it is like to attempt to make peace with another country."

"If you don't hear about the current events and there is anything you want to know, I would be more than happy to tell you. For instance, the Tigers swept the A's and are in the World Series."

"The reason I am writing is because I am wondering about what a Peace Cur is. The dictionary says it is a mean, cowardly person, but that doesn't make sense with peace. Please explain this to me."

"I think that the Peace Corps is a wonderful thing and it is amazing what you guys do."

"I also hope that someday I will be as good a person as you and join the Peace Corps."

Thanks, kids. Thanks.

And here's a picture of Seattle...in Jalalabad?

There’s a poster in the hallway of my school with a cactus on it. Dotted around the thorns are the names of students who have been tardy numerous times or are failing at least one of their classes. My students are brutal in taunting their classmates who are “cactus students,” sparing no insult or laugh in their derision. So much for the Communist Three Musketeers’ “all for one and one for all” mantra. Living in the city as opposed to the village has made teaching a completely different experience. In the village, the kids had to begin their English learning from scratch – ABCs and basic vocabulary. But in the city, the kids understand complex sentences and have to be taught more application-type grammar problems. It makes it difficult because when I present a crappy lesson plan, the kids can tell me it sucks instead of wondering if their English is too bad to understand it. Instead, we have lots of discussions in class. Basically Q&A with me about America, university life, and other random things. Today my students jumped on the “no money” part of being a volunteer and could not grasp the concept of working for free. I told them, “Money talks, but it can’t sing and dance, and it can’t walk.” “Of course it can’t,” they replied. They think they’re smart, but they’ve never heard of Neil Diamond?

I took the LSAT when I was back in the States. After studying for months, the test was exactly what I expected it to be: difficult. Likewise, applying to law schools has been a strenuous proposition, especially living overseas with limited access to resources (internet, people, books). Surprisingly enough, the most difficult obstacle in the long process thus far has been my own confidence, or lack thereof. I’m a confident person. I believe that all things I pursue are done best by me. And, yes, I am the best basketball player in Kyrgyzstan. But after pouring over countless books, articles, and opinions about law school and the admissions process, my airtight confidence wanes, cracking in the chilly air of Osh. I want to go to law school, it’s not matter of my wavering desire, but I’m getting a lot of pre-game jitters. It’s tough to squash the idea that those that I am competing against in the admissions game are 4.0 students with 180 LSAT scores and their own Fortune 500 company. Of course, that’s not true, but I can’t help but wonder sometimes if I have the right stuff, the smarts, the ability to conquer law school. Am I able to step into the top 1% of the world and succeed against these kinds of people? I’m not despondent. I’m not scared. But, as is the case when I feel that pinch from life, I can’t help but feel excited. A defiant smile (grimace?) paints my face in times like these. I’ve got it.

My mom screamed when she saw me. Is that a normal reaction when a mother sees her son? It is when you show up in a coffee shop in Tacoma after being in Kyrgyzstan for over a year. My dad and I planned the surprise beginning in July, so it was great that things worked out. But now I'm back in Central Asia, ready to finish my final year.

I knew I had been away for a long time when I reached Dulles International Airport in Washington D.C. After buying a few magazines, the sales lady complimented me on my English proficiency.

Hm.

Oh yeah, I went to Arslanbob two weeks ago. It’s famous among locals as the travel destination of choice because of its high mountains, waterfalls, and hiking all located in the small village hidden in a valley in Jalalabad oblast.

I wasn’t too impressed. But hey, here are some pictures anyway.

I accidentally threw a football into this river after this photo then had to jump in to grab it before it fell off the waterfall. Hiking with wet shoes sucks.

Pants are required in Arslanbob. High-stepping pants. Just kidding, but we laughed when we saw this sign.

I have a video of this cow using this turnstile. He did it like five times while we were standing there!

It’s dark outside when I walk to school in the morning these days. With the lack of street lights in the city, the thirty minute walk is unlit except for the ditches lining the streets. Early every morning, a small team of locals sweep the streets and sidewalks, gathering the dried leaves in the ditches before lighting them on each side of the street afire before the city wakes up. The rows of fire look like twin dragons racing up the street.

And the winter chill is back in the air – my favorite season (ha). The most common phrase among volunteers lately has been, “Was it this cold last year?” You can hear the sarcasm laced with a little fear in all of us that it’s going to be brutal like our first winter here. At least we know what’s coming this time.

There’s a noticeable decrease in energy among people as the temperature drops here. People are in a hurry to get indoors and are less willing to venture out of their homes. My students have begun grumbling about the weather as well, even blaming their poor performance on a recent test on the weather (nice try). I find myself zoning out as I walk from place to place, almost like the winter gusts are starting to freeze my brain.

I attend a local church here, but I don’t mingle much. As a Peace Corps volunteer, we do not participate in proselytizing at all, so it's important not to give that appearance in any way or form. Not to say that I’m abrasive or unapproachable to the congregation, but I don’t seek more active participation that I might in the States. But anyway, I was at church this morning and kind of standing there, staring into space like a zombie, when the praise music began. The song leader was a very young kid, probably only thirteen or fourteen, but her voice was incredible, I couldn’t believe it. Even more impressive was her enthusiasm and energy as she sang. Members of the congregation that were still groggy and waking up were transfixed and began clapping to the beat, dancing to the rhythm, and singing along. By the second song, the church had transformed from a silent room to a raucous crowd in worship. Even now, when I think back to this morning, I am amazed that one person’s energy could be transferred like that to so many people. It was like listening to a powerful speech by a talented orator – you couldn’t turn away even if the building were on fire.

In a word: amazing.

One last thing: remember my neighbor? I talked to my landlord about it and he came over today to speak with her about it. I expected to settle on a price between the three of us, but he arrived fully decked out in his customs officer’s uniform (complete with pointy hat, of course) and ate the lady alive in a harsh lecture. He told her that I was a volunteer, foreigner, and teacher, so I wasn’t going to pay and if she had other problems, she should speak with him because he owns the place (turns out he owns half the building). Then turned to me and said, “See? I told her.”

Yeah, I see.

There's just something about donkeys that makes me smile. Anyway, here's a picture of some donkeys and me in Tash Kumir.

The donkeys are on the left.

Across the hall from my apartment is an NGO. Wouldn’t it be strange if I was an SOCD volunteer and that was my workplace? I could just roll out of bed with 30 seconds to spare every morning, wipe the corn flakes off my cheeks, and save the world. I shouldn’t joke about working there though – it’s a female business leaders in Kyrgyzstan NGO. My forte!

So they’re my neighbors. We chat very neighborly usually – Hi, how’s it going? Good? Good. I’m good too. Yes, good. Good, good. Ok, goodbye. – But, today they threw a kink in our normally good (good) relationship. They tried to shake me down for cash! Supposedly one of the ladies who works at this NGO cleans the stairwell every once in awhile and they want 100 som (~$2.50 USD) per month from me for this service. We obviously don’t know each other that well: I haven’t cleaned my apartment since I moved in back in July. Their argument (We’re doing you a service!) and mine (I ordered pizza, not cleaning!) didn’t get us very far, so I just refused politely and tossed a candy wrapper on the floor. …Just kidding.

Honestly, I’m kind of disappointed. I like neighbors that make me apple pie, not ones that sweep my doorway and then ask for money.

Some of my students drive me crazy sometimes. The latest reason is because of some white powder they like to play with in class. I’m not going to lie, when they first pulled out bags of this stuff and hollowed out their pens, I said to myself, “These kids are going to snort coke right in the middle of my freaking class.” Turns out that it was just powdered sugar that they were eating with their pens.I drive them crazy sometimes too. I’m not much of a screamer, I just toss kids out of class when they don’t listen. But one last week, my students were being especially disrespectful so I launched into a tirade over their behavior. A student in the front began to wave his hands in front of his face, almost in desperation. It looked like he was waving off my words as his classmates laughed in chorus. Turns out I was spitting on him during my angry diatribe. Whoops.But things are good, real good. Making meals is so much easier with a rice cooker. I mean, rice goes with everything, it’s ridiculous. And besides…“I like rice. Rice is great if you’re hungry and you want 2000 of something.”

By now, leaders around the world should be breathing in for the first time in many hours after spending much of the day screaming in outrage over North Korea’s nuclear test. UN sanctions, whiny statements from presidential spokesmen, and “tough guy” posturing will litter the news wires for a few days too. Am I the only one who sees Kim Jong Il’s nuclear test as a good thing?

Before I am slammed by McCarthy from the grave, let me explain. First and foremost, President Bush must secretly love the timing of the news from East Asia. For the first time in months, the world’s spotlight has left the Middle East and is squarely on the Korean peninsula; there could be car bombs and suicide bombers going nuts in Iraq, but they’ll be Page 2 material for the next week. The only other thing that could have taken the media heat off of Bush would be if OJ tried to kill someone again; nothing scares people’s attention up like a nuclear weapon.

Second, while I don’t condone North Korea’s nuclear ambitions, it’s actually a brilliant political move by the hermitic nation to force America’s hand. They tried to force America into dialogue in July with their missile tests, but failed; the U.S. can’t ignore a nuclear test like seven missiles though. As full as America’s hands are with the situation in Iraq, they cannot set a precedent of indifference by continuing to stick to the Six Party Talks requirement for dialogue between itself and North Korea. Unlike Iraq’s supposed weapons of mass destruction program, North Korea’s is very real and must be addressed by the U.S. through direct talks. The problems that the U.S. have with North Korea have been ignored and pushed to the background for too long. This nuclear test will do exactly what Kim Jong Il seeks – seize the attention of the U.S. and force dialogue between the two enemies.

Today’s news is continually focused on Iraq and the Middle East, but for how much longer? With the rocket-like ascension of China, North Korea’s joining of the nuclear club, South Korea’s rise to the economic elite in the world, and Japan’s soon-to-be-revised constitution changing its foreign policy, it’s not hard to realize that North East Asia will soon dominate those same headlines. Beijing’s 2008 Olympics seem to be a logical start for the world’s renewed focus on the region, but you have to wonder if today’s nuclear test by North Korea has accelerated that change.

Terrifyingly exciting times that we live in.

I teach an advanced English club twice a week at school. The kids’ English is usually pretty good, so we get to have some high level discussions. Most of the questions they have are usually too intense for me to answer though: What do you think of the Iraq War? Why did Americans kill all the Indians? What is your opinion on the use of the atomic bomb? I think the kid called it “the most terrible offense against mankind in history.” Straight out of a Soviet-era text, I imagine. My cop-out answer is always the same: “Hey! I’m a Peace Corps volunteerbot – I don’t have any opinions on anything related to the United States government or its policies.”

My head is a box filled with nothing, and that’s the way I like it.

Aforementioned Lenin statue in Osh. Biggest one in Central Asia too.