My parents were apart of a migration to the west coast in the 1970's and by default I became I Californian. There's nothing quite like being able to say I was born and raised (for at least a good portion of my underage life) in sunny San Diego. It almost always draws a positive reaction from whoever has asked about my hometown. Most often people love to relate the great feelings they have for the city after a vacation/business trip with a dream-like haze in their eyes and a smile on their face. I certainly can't complain about being raised in one of the world's best year-round climates that's seasons are described as "nice, nice, nice, and a little chilly". Not only is San Diego beautiful, but it offers an abundance of activities from the world-famous San Diego Zoo to Sea World, Balboa Park full of museums, and a great local music scene. Don't get me started on the plethora of food options.

How many places in the world could you start your day on the water, surfing as the sun rises, and finish in the mountains, tearing your way down the slopes? San Diego offers both activities within a 1 1/2 hour drive. Like any major city, San Diego does have its traffic. Luckily you'll never spend 4 hours sitting on the freeway, creeping along 15 miles an hour like a certain city to the north *cough LA cough cough*. And while we're talking about unfavorable northern neighbors, San Diego offers a great hometown feel. People are generally pleasant and helpful. It's not uncommon to run into someone you know while shopping throughout the city. Not to big, not to small. Just right.

San Diego truly is America's Finest City.

Access to money was key to the many adventures we took while my mom visited. This is Peter, our drug dealer, as mom lovingly called him. The first night at Chameleon's. The bus ride from hell. Thank goodness they sold bags of ice at one of the 30 stops we made. Unfortunately the camera broke on the way so we don't have any pictures from the lake. The nicest portion of the trip was Satemwa Tea Estates, one of the most beautiful places in Malawi. After such a miserable trip to the lake on public transport, mom wanted to hitch. This was my contribution to getting a ride: Once we got to the turn off for Satemwa, it was only another 5 km (3.1 miles) to the actual house. It took a lot of convincing, but mom managed to take a bike taxi. Our room was absolutely gorgeous, completed by a deep bath tub with lion feet. The food was great, and each meal was served somewhere different. Tea Tasting.

It was great to introduce my Malawian family to my American mom. She showered them with all sorts of presents. Maggie in her new shirt. This little guy continues to get so big! Talking up a storm.All sorts of village activities were undertaken, inlcuding lessons on how to pump water at a borehole. After giving a demo, Mom, Matt, and Mel (GRS interns) learned to carry water on their heads.

Andrew became the guinea pig for my mom learning how to carry a baby on her back. I don't think he minded much.

We also checked up on the library project

And hung out with Innocent

The past 3 weeks has been a whirlwind trip around Malawi and Zambia with my mom who came all the way from San Diego! Here she is at the Malawi-side of the border. Our first stop was South Luangwa National Park to see the animals. The first sighting of the morning was this guy chowing down on a buffalo. She survived near leopard attack (though the leopard didn't actually do anything, even if she says otherwise). We saw lots of hippos.

Our awesome driver found a massive (1000+) heard of Cape Buffalo. And I can't forget about my 3rd favourite animal, the giraffe. There were elephants all over who came right up the vehicle, or sometimes just stood there to block the road. We also saw some funny looking horses. By the second day of drives, we were all getting bored with the animals "oh look, another elephant/hippo/impala". Instead I tasked the guide to find elephants in water:

After 3 years of waiting, South Luangwa was worth the trip, despite 7 hr bus rides each way.

Today God decided I needed to remember that Malawi is the warm heart of Africa. This came after I openly admitted yesterday evening sitting around the campfire that I wanted to go home. Malawi has changed drastically the past 6 months and is no longer the place I fell in love with. There are queues everywhere: the filling station, the atm, the bank. There are national blackouts, the water board continually turns off the water, the cell phone network is mediocre at best, and we’re lucky when a filling station receives a tanker of fuel. Today’s story isn’t much different from those special experiences we have while in Malawi that proves how nice people are here from time to time. It is centered around thoughtfulness and willing to go above and beyond for a stranger. Petrol has been scarce for the past week. Although we have 3 work cars, all have run empty and have been stranded at various locations. Saturday gave me a full day to find petrol and fill up. I found a station near my house that had received gas a few hours earlier and got in the line, approximately 50 cars long. We continually moved ahead and I sat reading my book as a distraction from the vendors walking by. As I approached the station with 4 cars in front of me the news spread: they had run out of petrol. By now the gas meter is significantly below empty and I’m worried about being able to drive home. I found a few cars waiting at the gas station by my house. Perhaps news had spread that they would receive a shipment. With no other options, I parked the first car and walked home to collect the second. It’s in such bad shape that pressing on the fuel causes the car to shudder, but somehow it makes it. I made friends with the couple waiting in front of me and exchanged numbers before I walked to the nearby shops. I received a call from the woman letting me know a car in front of me had left and I needed to move the car. At 5 o’clock we found out the shipment wouldn’t arrive until tomorrow. Not sure what to do, I consulted my new friends. The husband decided he would sleep at the station and call if there were any problems. Sunday Morning: I woke up from a worker tapping on my window. In my half sleep I understood that someone was at the gate regarding the petrol station. I quickly ran out to find the couple waiting at the gate, notifying me that the shipment of petrol had arrived 2 hours earlier. They waited while I grabbed my things and upon seeing them again, I asked a very direct question: how did you know where I lived? Their answer was not something I expected: we asked. I live in a community with walls 10 feet high and each house hidden from view. I couldn’t tell you who lived on either side. And there are 40 houses in my area alone. Somehow they continually asked for me until they found the right house, all after they had received petrol and could leave on their way. They had tried calling but my phone was off. They took me back to the station, arranged with the station attendant that I should be next to get fuel since he’d been waiting all night, and helped me move both cars. He also offered to assist drive the vehicles back to my house so I didn’t have to walk but I graciously declined, he had already done so much for me. And. He didn’t ask for anything. He did all of this without expecting compensation in return. It is rare in Malawi to find people willing to help out without getting something in return, and here this man and his wife had gone above and beyond for someone who drives 2 rav4’s while he drives a small Toyota pickup that’s missing windows and a door handle. As if I didn’t get the point that God was trying to give me, there was another example waiting to chat with me. As I was receiving petrol a man nearby overheard me speaking Chichewa. He was very impressed and asked where and how I learned. I explained that I had come to Malawi as a Peace Corps volunteer (we have a reputation of great language skills because we spend so much time mastering the language before we start working) and have continued on working at the hospital. This man, named Happy, explained that he had been taught by a PCV years ago and it made a huge difference in helping him reach his goal of becoming a journalist, which he did. He was so enthusiastic about Peace Corps that he even wants to donate to the program and assist in any way possible. I couldn’t help but feeling like this was the reminder I needed on why I have stayed in Malawi for nearly 3 years. While most days leave me frustrated and apathetic, a day like today reiterates how wonderful people here really can be and that perseverance is one of the most important skills to learn while working in Malawi.

I want to deliver babies for the rest of my life. I’m prepared sleepless nights, teenage patients, malpractice insurance, and being the first person to greet a new life on a daily basis. I want to hold each spirit as they come into this world and take their first breath before I hand them over to the person who will love and care for them for the rest of their life. I want to see women transform from misery and frustration to overwhelming joy with just a glance at their child. Then I want to walk into the next room and do it again. I’ve wanted to be an OB/GYN since high school. I entered BYU as a pre-med student and quickly realized I wasn’t prepared to commit the time and energy it would take to get into medical school, especially competing against classmates 5-7 years older. I joined Peace Corps unsure of what I wanted. The longer I was there, the more I knew I wanted to practice medicine. Then I thought I found the perfect compromise: Physician Assistant - an intense 2 year program that gives you the basic rights of practicing medicine under a physician. I felt confident when people asked what I wanted to do after Peace Corps; I had found a respectable profession that would provide a comfortable life and humor my interest in medicine. But who wants to compromise on what they’ll be doing for the rest of their lives? So many people (most of whom are physicians) always asked why I would settle with being a PA and not go for med school. I found all sorts of great excuses: “I don’t want to be in school so long” “PA’s have a better family life” “I can do the same things without being on call”, etc. They were all excuses. The real reason I didn’t want to apply to medical school was because I’m afraid to fail. I’m sincerely afraid that I’ll apply and not be accepted, that I’m not smart enough or talented enough to succeed. But to hell with fear. Aren’t the greatest risks the ones with the biggest pay offs? I was scared to death about joining the Peace Corps and being away from home for 2 years, and now I’m on year 3 in Malawi. It doesn’t hurt that I’m unbelievably stubborn. I will be a doctor, and I’ll be good at it. And still have a family. And be a normal, sociable person. Ok, maybe not so normal.

Eliza Doolittle has been added to my "Dance Like No One's Watching" playlist. Check out this video.

I was staring out the front door today when something occurred to me. What's wrong about these next few pictures?

I guess I should clarify: nothing is wrong with these photos. In fact, I'm a huge proponent of these photos. They illustrate that in nature males are more colorful and flamboyant as a way to win the females. They dress up, groom themselves, and dance to gain the attention of potential mates.

So why is it that women seem to have taken on this role for men? We dress up, take care of ourselves, and compete with other women to win the attention of men. Maybe we should all be a little more conscious of our behaviors and aim for a more equal courtship (and re-read He's Just Not That Into You). Don't worry, I'm not going to stop shaving my legs. But I am going to stop persuading guys to feel differently. The future Mr. Meagan is going to equally try to gain my attention. It certainly wouldn't hurt if he knew how to make cheesecake.

Hi. I haven't updated my blog in a while because, frankly, I haven't felt like it. There was nothing I wanted to share with the world. Then I realized, screw that. I have plenty to share with the world that may or may not be entertaining to others, but will at least be entertaining to myself.

I'm a little scatter-brained, but I think that's why my friends like me. I ask questions like, "do you think they make stethoscopes in different lengths?" (they do). Today's ramblings focus on what I want in a future mate. I thought of a few things that I am looking for these days in the future Mr. Meagan (uck, that sounds really gross).

1.I want a guy who's health conscious. That's my new resolution for 2011 after hiring a personal trainer to kick my butt into shape. I want someone who's motivated to eat healthy, buy organic, and support local farmers. But, I do not want someone who protests walmart, throws paint on fur coats, or chains themselves to trees. I need a moderate hippy :)

2.

I want someone who will let me browse bookstores for as long as it takes to satisfy my thirst for knowledge (sometimes hours, sometimes 5 minutes). I hate feeling rushed when I shop, which is ironic because I don't really like to shop, so the last thing I want is to feel like I'm dragging someone along or inflicting pain. Bookstores are amazing and I've spent a lot of my life in the them so he better enjoy it or let me shop on my own.

3.

If you're not motivated, you need not apply as the future Mr. It's more important to see someone who's passionate and willing to do what it takes to get what they want then who sits around. I don't even care what you're motivated in, just that you have passion.

4. I'll know it's the guy I'm supposed to marry when I choose him over cheesecake. This has yet to happen with any guy I've dated.

Bonus Points:

No, not being the president, or black. What else is different about this picture? I am quite partial to lefties, being one myself and a guy would definitely get bonus points for being a lefty.

It's been a while, eh? I started working for a new organization called Grassroot Soccer which means I'm learning how to play. Scary, eh? Here is my lovely co-worker, Brian. And the coaches I work with. Also my roommate and intern, Wes.I took a quick trip to teh States for New years to party with these beautiful ladies.And finally made it back to Tchawale to see this little guy.And these beautiful little girls.

Andrew wanted to give kisses.

Will came along to get the full village experience.

Andrew has learned to walk and share his candies.Laha enjoyed all of the sweets we brought.Bubbles were a very big hit.Much needed catch-up with this guy. He seems to have forgotten who I am :(

Will has now become a part of the family. Amayi was giving extra blankets and saying, "I'm not worried about you, I'm worried about him being cold". Now I know my place on the totem poll.

And how could I not mention; I brought Luma back to the city. I finally feel content again.

We are all asked to donate something at some point in our lives: time, money, energy, or canned goods, but how often are we reminded to donate a part of ourselves? I’m currently reading Trust is Not Enough: Bringing Human Rights to Medicine by David J. Rothman and Sheila M. Rothman. I picked it up before returning to Malawi at a bookstore in Princeton. As a future medical practitioner of some sort, I find these topics interesting. I have also just finished Better by Atul Gawande and Cutting for Stone by Abraham Verghese, both excellent books and good commentary on medicine. The Rothmans have 4 major themes, the first being “their uncompromising commitment to the integrity of the human body”. It gives significant background to international organ trafficking and plundering. Did you know that Singapore uses a point system based on different criteria such as age, severity of illness, and employment status to decide where you fall on the transplant waiting list? Or most Asian societies refuse to donate because they believe death is when the heart stops and not brain death? Or that Belgium has a “presumed consent” statute that assumes everyone is willing to donate unless they specifically register not to? In the US alone, around 110,105 people are waiting a transplant. My question is this. Why is it that when Americans are asked for permission to take an organ from a deceased relative, 53% refused? Would you want to receive an organ if it meant a chance to continue living? In the state of California, there is a simple form attached to your driver’s license. I keep mine with me at all times. I also try to donate blood whenever possible (although I have low blood pressure and pass out occasionally at the blood bank). I would gladly give my family, friends, or a perfect stranger a kidney if it meant they would have a chance to continue living a healthy life. I would hope that you would do the same for me or anyone else in need. I have faith that by being a registered donor I will make a difference in someone’s life one day, whether I’m 25 or 75. Register. Donate blood. Do what you can to save a life.

Learn more at unos.orgFind out how to register in your state at organdonor.gov

Something is really bothering me. I don't usually write serious posts. I'm more of a conversationalist than a writer. But as I drove home last night, I realized it was more important that I wrote this out rather than stewing over it.

I'm back in Malawi working for an organization called Grassroot Soccer. Now I live in Lilongwe, the capitol city and have access to a car. The past 2 nights I've driven a friend home to her house in a particular area of town. On my way there is a place where prostitutes congregate, waiting to be picked up. These girls and women are dressed in minimal clothes and stand often alone or in pairs in the dark. Every time I drive by I want to stop and ask them how much I would have to pay them to not sell themselves for money. Even more, I want to stop all of the men who use these girls for their bodies, while most have a wife or girlfriend(s) at home.

How do you deal with prostitution when you know so many of these girls need the money to support their families? Why can't we create an economic environment that provides enough opportunities for work without dehumanizing a woman? It's a very visual reminder that there is still so much room for improvement, not only here but all over the world where rape and gender-based violence still occur.

With less than a month left to go in Malawi I made one last trip to the south to visit my friend Adam and assist in a model school.

It was an enjoyable 2 hour bike taxi to get to his house from the road. I bruised in places I didn't know could bruise.The view was beautiful, riding along a mountain range.I was officially jealous of his spacious and new house, equipped with solar lighting. I only spent a night and then we took another 2 hour bike taxi to the road.After climbing up a big hill, we rested at a merry-go-round that draws water up to a tank.And I quickly became motion-sick.Then Adam and I assisted with a model school for the Peace Corps trainees. It was the last time Adam and I will teach in Malawi. Yippee!Adam was left in charge of finding accommodations. That was a big mistake. We checked in to a lodge that was booked, but "luckily" had a staff room we could stay in. Adam seems to overlook the fact that there was no lock, or handle on the door. There was a communal bathtub, but no shower. Next door was the owner, reading in bed with his wife, with the door open.

They tried to remedy the situation of bathing by sneaking us into another guest's room to shower. The water was freezing and as Adam attempted to bathe, the power went out leaving us in the dark. Our room was decorated with military garb, caps and a cane. Turns out the owner was recently discharged from the army and on trial for a plot to assassinate the president of Malawi. He was acquitted.

I refused to take pictures.

We decided to try our luck and find better accommodations.

That was a stupid idea.

The headteacher of the school we visited offered to stay at his home. He's an incredibly gracious host.

Unfortunately we had a spoon instead of a door handle. And a communal cold shower. And a bed frame, but no mattress. We made the most of it, though.

On the last day we went to Zomba Plateau and walked around. It was beautiful. Adam and I decided to hike to a waterfall, thinking we were on a path. The outcome of our adventure included cuts and bruises all over my legs, thanks to lovely thorns and other undesirables.

But it was worth it.

Especially after we found the road that went to the falls.

And a lovely lunch in town. Rice and chicken at Uncle Dan's Restaurant.

The ambassador hosts all of the Americans in Malawi (half of which are Peace Corps) for a nice 4th of July celebration, including hot dogs and hamburgers, yum!

We celebrated Maggie’s birthday on 6 July (Malawian Independence Day) with a cake and chicken.

With the help of my friend Adam, I decided to burn the field behind my house to prevent snakes, etc from coming too close. The quote of the day was “wow, this is really easy to get started”. Unfortunately, I live in a very windy location. My fence caught on fire but I was able to prevent any major damage. The only serious damage I really caused was to my singed eye lashes, brows, and a chunk of hair. Whoops.

I fell rather ill for the first time in a while with a nasty sinus infection. Luckily I have a lovely family here who made me hot cocoa, cooked rice, and heated bath water when I couldn’t fathom getting out of bed. I’m so blessed.

And signifying the approach of my return to the States we had a close of service conference at the lake. It was probably the last time my group will have been together. We entered Malawi as 22, with 16 remaining. We painted pottery as our last “team building exercise”. I decided to go for a teapot with an acacia and baobab while Adam painted a mug tallying all the days we have spent in Malawi.

Now it’s time to get back to Laha

and this little guy. Oh and I guess this one, too.

You forget American Holidays until your dad reminds you (Happy belated Mother’s Day)

Your family forgets to tell you about vacation plans, births, and heart attacks

You cook nsima using your feet and/or legs to hold the pot

You pick up hot charcoal with your bare hands

You look at yourself in the mirror once a week, if you have a mirror. When you do look at yourself, you don’t recognize the person staring back at you

You no longer miss Home Depot because everything you need to build is locally available (mud bricks, corn stalks, mud, broom handles)

You say things like “in my culture”, “According to my side”, switching L’s and R’s both writing and speaking, and speaking in third person to get your point across: “madam is not happy”

A teacher tells you that you are a “bad woman”

You can’t remember the sensation of ordering whatever you want off a menu and not worrying if they have it or not

Paying for the guinea fowl your dog killed is just another weekly expenditure

You argue over a 6 cent discount at the market

You wear stripes, floral, and solids in one outfit. And then your neighbor children tell you that you are dressed nicely and you gladly take the compliment as if your effort getting dressed paid off

You can sing along to all of the commercials on Zodiak (ZBS radio, Malawi)

You can’t remember the last time you talked to any of your family on the phone

You get in heated debates about development with Members of Parliament, who picked you up on the side of the road, because you feel entitled to an opinion on how they run the country

You convert prices into Kwacha to determine if it’s expensive or not

You love free transport and are outraged at the idea of having to pay for petrol (I mean, gas), insurance, or maintenance of a vehicle

Your neighbors heat bath water for you because they are afraid you won’t bathe

You start believing in witchcraft because you have evidence for yourself

You buy Doom because something keeps biting you when you sleep and makes you itch like crazy

You know that a full moon means all night drumming and singing

The termites eat through the poles of your fence in one week, you burn down your fence, the termites eating the door frame keeps you up at night, you take a hoe to your door frame because the termites already ate through the 2 X 3

You’ve killed a chicken and hung it on your fence to drain

You fantasize about store-bought chicken, already killed, de-feathered, gutted, cleaned, and cooked!

Well, my loves, this signifies the beginning of the end. I’ll be departing the warm heart of Africa in September! It’s bitter-sweet. There are times when I am ready to get off this continent and be close to my family while other days (scratch that, hours) I can’t imagine saying goodbye and giving up this beautiful life. I’ve enjoyed so much of my time here and despite the many struggles, I am happy I made this decision. It has made me a better person, especially in being more self-aware. I know my strengths and weaknesses now. I’m still stubborn (sorry Mom and Dad) but I know where I’ve been and where I want to go. What more can I ask for right now? mmmm… Cheesecake!

Despite a rather severe cold, I’ve had lots of fun the past 2 weeks. I spent a weekend in Lilongwe to welcome new volunteers to the Peace Corps community. Somehow, that included staying out until 2 am Friday AND Saturday dancing. I certainly do love to dance and hate passing up the opportunity.

We went back to school but I’m only taking 8 periods a week so I have more flexibility to work on other projects such as a library for the primary school. You can read more here (parkwantstobuildalibrary.blogspot.com). I’ve been thoroughly overwhelmed with how much support people have given towards this project. Now I’m busy trying to put it into action.

I hosted the second bi-monthly yoga weekend. We made chicken calzones, potato chowder, chicken pot pie, and cinnamon rolls. Oh, and homemade English muffins. A friend said he thought he gained weight over the weekend which I’m taking as a compliment. We did some yoga, including animal yoga! It was great fun, down to the pedicure party.

Now I’m making a quick trip to Lilongwe to pick up some cough drops and cough suppressant. I also will bring back a friend, Courtney, to visit before she heads home to the States.

My life is beautiful.

I have spent a lovely week in the south of Malawi visiting new places and seeing old friends. It started in Blantyre for a nice lunch and movie. I spent the night at a tea estate and saw tea for the first time. I always assumed they grew it as trees because everyone talks about tea tree oil but no, they trim it into bushes. It must be harvested every 10-14 days and there are fields upon fields upon fields of it growing.

The next day we went to Mulanje mountain to go swimming in the pools. It was my first time seeing the mountain and I was quite impressed. It’s HUGE! And it isn’t a part of a mountain range which is unique.

I then spent some time at the site of my friend, Kelly. She lives in the district Thoylo which is full of fruit. She also lives very close to a Seventh Day Adventist mission so I shadowed a doctor for the day. I watched *wink wink* a birth, cervical screening, and tubal ligation in the OR. It gave me the boost I needed to realize my passion. I want to go into emergency obstetrics (high risk pregnancies, etc). It will be a long road but I should do something I love, and I love everything about it.

We spent the night at another friend’s, Megan. She works at the hospital teaching nursing. Megan made lemon grass wine, which was delicious.The weekend was a fun filled continuous party for Kelly’s birthday in Blantyre. We went to a nice dinner and then dancing until 3 am. I need a vacation from my vacation! It was bitter sweet because its the last time so many of my group will be together.

To end a wonderful trip, I went horseback riding today around the estate. I also got to see a Clydesdale (who would have thought they would be in Malawi?). All around, the south is beautiful and I don’t know why I waited so long to see it.

Makes Meagan a productive little bee.

Before the project of plastering and cementing...

Sidenote- the cockroach from my "critters" post. Please don't look at the dirty foot.

The plastered bbq.

Constructing a coffee table.

Nothing like a little light reading...

This little critter showed up...

Now I'm trying to get my garden back up again.

And I came into town to meet this little one. Grace Sophia

(28 April)

It started at 5:15 this morning when I woke up from a drizzle on my tin roof. Knowing it was still dark outside and that I had 2 hours until I needed to get to school, I forced myself back to sleep. I don’t think I’ve mentioned that my alarm clock broke but it didn’t really matter, I wake up by 6:30 every morning. Today I failed myself. I woke up refreshed to look at my phone and see it was 7:30; 10 minutes after I was supposed to be teaching form 4 biology. Oops.

I taught 4 periods today: customer service in form’s 3 and 4 life skills, human rights for people with HIV/AIDS in form 2, and cancer in form 4 biology. School was relatively calm despite 6 of the 10 teachers absent.

I came home and relaxed on my beautiful couch. Emily and Laha came over and decided the barbies needed a bath. I concurred with the stipulation they had to draw the water. They loved washing the barbies and even asked if they could wash their clothes. Thank goodness I have been sent a year’s supply(literally) of Pantene pro-v. *side note. Barbie now comes with painted on panties, but no bra. Since when do Hannah Montana dolls need breasts? Isn’t she a 15 year old girl? Can’t they put a training bra on at least? I’m just saying…* The girls dried the clothes on the leaves of my banana tree because they can’t reach my clothes’ line. Very ingenious.

We collected some maize in the garden to roast for a snack and I baked a tart for dessert. During dinner, Lawrence (uncle to Emily and Laha) walked in with an animal. I say an animal because I haven’t decided if it’s a porcupine or hedgehog. It was a cute little fella. Finally, I found a purpose for all the socks I brought to Malawi. We tried to feed it pumpkin leaves, maize, and a mouse but it wasn’t hungry. Why did we have mice on hand, you might ask. Because Mr. Longwe bought them as a side dish for Emily and Laha. No, I did not eat them.

Now I’m curled up in bed at 8:23, 23 minutes past my bedtime. I hope I don’t oversleep again tomorrow but considering this was the first time in 19 months, I’m not worried.

(24 April)

I was feeling pretty proud of myself and how I handled my 2 snake encounters. Now it seems the critters have come out to attack me. First, I heard a strange noise coming from my toilet last night. As soon as I removed the cover, a bat flew out at me. Then this afternoon as I sat on my bed working on the computer, something fell on me. I jumped up to see it scurry under my bed. It was a cockroach the size of my large toe. It took a nice dose of mosquito repellent to sedate it enough for me to step on it. Then as I sat this evening at my table, I hear some scurrying on my tin roof. I look up to see the nose of a rat sticking out. Critters 3 - Meagan 0. I’m officially not enjoying this and plan to buy every sort of poison and insecticide I find in town tomorrow. This is war and I will not lose (and by losing, I mean wetting the bed from nightmares of the critters getting me).

And don’t forget, any critter that is killed in this battle will be donated to science. If my neighbor will come and remove it for me like she so graciously did with the dead cockroach.

I've done so much this month, and it isn't even over yet. What am I doing with myself? Kaya (don't know). But I certainly am keeping busy.

I had some extra material lying around so I sewed a dress for Laha. I have a strapless dress out of the same material so we can dress mother/daughter.

Laha turned 5. We killed a chicken and made curry and rice (big deal meal).

I also made a birthday cake with homeade frosting.

The girls liked the frosting that night, but only would eat the cake part the next day. Strange children.

I had my second snake encounter in country. This time it was in MY HOUSE. I was getting ready for bed and saw it behind a bucket. granted, It was only a foot long, but a snake. The biologist in me dissected it as a lesson for kids.

I hosted a yoga weekend for Easter.

We cooked. A lot.

Pitas.

Hummus.

Chicken Fajitas.

All fresh ingredients.

I had my friend Joce remove my stitches from a mole removal. She's going to med school so I figured I could be practice.

We sang hymns to bring a feel of Easter to Malawi. (Don't worry, I usually wear clothes, but we decided it would be nice to lay out in the sun and have girl talk).

My house is getting an addition. The current size is 14 X 14 ft. The addition is a bedroom that's 10 X 10! I don't know what I'll do with all of the space.

How the materials got to my house.

Half way!

Plaster.

Meagan the Builder. So it's not as catchy as Bob the Builder, but I've become quite the mason. Or at least brick layer. I made a bbq pit. Here's after day one. Now I've plastered and will finish with a cement prep counter. I was tired of cooking on the ground.

I've been nurturing my nursery beds of carrots, tomatoes, soya, and flowers.

And also nurturing my relationship with these beautiful women.Life IS Beautiful.

-me

What I’m destined to be I’ve been though the pain and the sorrow This struggle is nothing but love For the 5 (okay 4) people who follow my blog, I dedicate this entry to myself. This is my year of self-discovery. It seems that everywhere I look, I find something new about myself, for example: § I stay calm when I find a snake § I love baking (I always thought I was only good at cooking and my mom was the baker in the family) § I can laugh when I’m reminded every day how fat I am (in a beautiful, loving way of course) § I am still really bad about making time for exercising, but it’s actually nice to run with someone instead of by myself § I enjoy spending time alone (something I used to dread) § Maybe I don’t want to get married and have kids § Maybe I’d adopt on my own if I don’t find someone to spend my life with § God, and my relationship with God, is my concern, and mine alone § Most often complaining or listening to complaining only brings me down § My mood is tied to the weather § Using a hoe to till is a great way to get out my frustrations § Opening up to my neighbors gives me an entirely different sense of purpose for being in Malawi § I’m a lot stronger than I (or most everybody) gives me credit for During my initial 3 months of training, my group thought I’d be the one to give up and go home. At the time I didn’t care about their opinion. I wasn’t here to prove to them that I could make it. Now looking back, I’m a little bothered that people characterized me as a failure. I love being here. I love my neighbors, my kids, and the weather. I like my job, my house, my community. I dislike the apathy and laziness. I hate the disrespect I’m shown, the kids who harass me, and being sick. Life here is not perfect. There are plenty of moments I lose my patience and on a few occasions, snap. But I can’t imagine being anywhere else. I am honest about my emotions, something more people are afraid to do. If you ask me how I’m doing, I won’t say fine if I’m not. I’ve always valued my honesty, although some would prefer I only share the good. Today was a good day. I ate breakfast at my neighbors, took a quick shopping trip into town, and cooked stir-fried eggplant for lunch. I found bugs in my rice, after I put it in to cook. It took me 30 minutes to start a fire, and I burned my thumb on the charcoal. My backyard is flooding and I’m worried about my seedlings. I helped plant flowers are my boss’s house with his kids. I cut material to make a skirt. Tonight I will play with Andrew and eat nsima with my family. This is my life and I wouldn’t give it away. I encourage everyone to be honest. With others and with yourself, especially. I have been reflecting daily on different topics and started a meditation journal. Here are some words of wisdom, by Meagan Wyllie. Happiness is a decision, not a consequence. Only dreams give birth to Change. Dream, hope, plan. Living simply doesn’t mean going without, but de-cluttering your life to enjoy the simple moments. Forget what the world wants. Be what you want. Don’t let the world define your happiness. As a child we know what we want with assurance. Strive for that decisiveness again. Don’t be afraid to be stubborn to get what you really want. Laugh Laugh Laugh I love you all and look forward to reconnecting in a short 9 months.

… and Other Various Cultural Exchanges. I returned to Malawi after a wonderful and much needed vacation in the States with many prizes for my kids. Books, Playdoh and flashcards galore, but the true excitement was the Hannah Montana Barbie dolls.

Meet Madam Wyllie:

And Madam Kelly (my blonde sitemate):

I’ve also taught many people here that dogs are actually good companions and should be loved, not abused. AKA I took in another puppy (named Puppy, but pronounced like Poppy). Wouldn’t you with this face?

Maybe not after you came home to find that he and Luma did this:

Yes. Those are my favorite pair of glasses. Destroyed.

Luma isn’t so sure about this new addition to the family.

I try to spend some time everyday with this little guy, who’s growing so fast.

I’ve also introduced sunflower seeds (which everyone LOVES), crepes with homemade applesauce, and groundnut balls. The next cooking lesson will be on funnel cakes. All of this cooking can be explained by the 10 kgs of flour sitting in my kitchen.

And on a sad/funny note, Emily (6) was playing with an ax and accidently chopped through the bone of Lahabe’s finger (4). She has had is sewn back one twice now, but she’s a trooper. It really is quite humorous, if you think about it.

What’s new with you?

Three months without a peep! But this is going to change. It's 2010, and as my friend said, it's our decade. It will be the decade of marriages, babies, and mortgages. It will be my 20's and early 30's. It will provide excitement, adventure, joy, tears, and hopefully lots and lots of laughter. Life will change, grow, and move forward. I can't wait.

The past 3 weeks have been filled with lots of adventures in the States. It started in Boston, some time in Northampton, then to Cape Cod, Rhode Island, Philadelphia, New Jersey, the Cape, and Boston again. Here's my trip highlights.

It's good to be in America

A great meal :)

School Street? We got lost going to Boston.

Waiting for my mom at the airport

Omni Parker House Hotel in Boston

Christmas baking is overrated

Erica hit a sign. Hand carved with gold inlay

The Squire on Cape Cod for some chowda

Provencetown, Cape Cod

fixing the Star of David on the tree

A fourth Cormier daughter

Christmas Eve. The joy of iPhones

Great Friends

Christmas Morning

Our matching bracelets. Be the change you want to see in the world.

Surprising the Schrieber family at our annual luncheon.

Our clamming adventure

Nobody told me it was quicksand...

A razor clam

Many the miles. Only one year left...

Welcome to Malawi, Education 2009-2011! You are all so clean now... wait until you get done with homestay. :)

I think summer is officially starting. I wore my strapless dress I had made (of course I wore a top over it to keep modest).

I’ve finished organizing the laboratory!Thanks to help from Ian and some of my students, it’s looking pretty sharp.Now I’m working to get some $$ to buy sodium hydroxide to neutralize all the dangerous acids we have (think fuming hydrochloric acid, sulphuric acid, etc)We had a good bye party for Alfred who takes care of the Peace Corps transit house in Mzuzu.It was nice to have his family over for an American meal of pasta, salad, and desserts.

… and garlic bread.Back at site for term 3! All my friends visiting the summer hut. (Notice the curtains?)Thanks a million for all of your packages, especially Dad and Bonnie. I’m now well supplied with hand sanitizer and Kleenex.

The lake was exactly what I needed to rejuvenate. It was nice to read, sleep, and enjoy the water. Here's a sample of pictures from the trip.

Our chalet/porch

transporting cokes

a view from the walk we went on

the lake seen from our room

sunrise over the lake. You can see the mountains of Mozambique in the distance.

Ian reading by the water

Mountains Beyond Mountains- a really good book the jives with what I want to do in life.

reading at sunset on our porch

as the sun goes down in front of our room

It's term break again so I have 3 weeks off to gallivant around Malawi. It started on Wednesday going up to Mzuzu from my site. I left Tchwale (my home) at 8 am. Stopped by the bank in Mponela and then started hitching. I got picked up by nine from a NGO (non-government organization). They took me up to Kasungu. After they dropped me off, within 5 minutes I was picked up by a guy who works for MTL (the phone company here). He was nice but we stopped every couple of kilometers to check on the digging for fiber optic cables (MALAWI IS GETTING HIGH SPEED INERNET!!!!) Around 12 we ended up on the side of the road waiting for his friend to come. I got another ride from a guy who works for Paladin, the mining company who is drilling for uranium up north. I finally arrived in Mzuzu around 2. 350 kilometres in six hours. Price: free. My time here in Mzuzu has been spent doing one of the following:but not:

“The last time you updated your blog was when you had Mumps, and that had to be at least a month ago”

-impatient mother

After having my case of Mumps, I returned to school to find 4 other girls sick. I had them come stay in my house, which you can see isn’t very spacious.

I am the matron of the Wildlife club so I took my students on a fieldtrip to Lilongwe Nature Sanctuary. For some of them, it was their first time to the city. I had to explain the function of traffic lights. Unfortunately we all got a little food poisoning from the beans and rice we brought along for lunch.

**wanted to add photos, but internet is so slow. next time**

I experimented with cornrows. One of my students did it for me after school one day. They only lasted 3 days because they are itchy! Hopefully I'll try again and make them last longer.I spend all my time it seems at school, helping the students get ready for their exams. Here are a few pictures of my form 4’s working on drawing ecosystems.

I also taught my students Red Rover and Simon Says. Both were very popular.

**wanted to add photos, but internet is so slow. next time**

I got a dog! I named him Luma which means bite in Chichewa. He certainly lives up to his name. He keeps me company and hopefully will keep away the thieves. I was sick yesterday so Luma ate raw ramen and peanut butter for breakfast because I didn't want to start a fire to cook for it. Mom laughed and offered to send dog food.

It’s better in Riverside... I love second-hand clothes in Africa.

And... Termites are still eating my house.

**wanted to add photos, but internet is so slow. next time** Two weeks till break!

So I might have mumps. I'm not saying it's for sure, but when your perotid gland swells up, there aren't so many options. That or it's bacterial. Or it's autoimmune. Yes, I've had my MMR immunization, and a booster. But I was the girl who got chicken pox twice, remember? Chunky Monkey Normal Jaw

Not so normal Jaw

Fattie!

Although the things I email or blog about really occur here in Malawi, there are often events I forget to mention which are important aspects of the culture, experience, and scenery of Malawi. One such example occurred during a training last week in Dedza. Parents like to say to their children, “there are starving children in Africa” when their kids don’t want to finish dinner. I found myself saying this to a friend at dinner that hadn’t finished their plate (not that we all aren’t guilty of this). After we cleared our plates, we stepped outside the dining hall to find several boys, barefoot, holding out plastic bags with a mix of leftovers from different patrons. There really are starving children in Africa. Although some of these children have learned the art of begging, others are sincerely looking for a meal that they wouldn’t get at home. I have sat at a restaurant near the Peace Corps office in Lilongwe and had children watch as we ate, waiting until we were finished and they could come clear our plates into their bags. Having been here 6 months already, this has just become a part of my reality. I want to make a more sincere effort to share with you the things that occur here which might be more painful to recount, but give a more accurate account of the problems as well as the triumphs that Malawians face tsiku ndi tsiku (day to day).

A huge part of my free time spent here is reading. During college I felt guilty pleasure reading when I could have been studying. Now I have all the time to indulge. Here’s what I have read in the past 6 months, although most were read since December when I moved to site.

Slaughterhouse Five

Fahrenheit 451

Marley and Me

Jane Eyre

Eat Pray Love

Book of Mormon

Maisie Dobbs

My Name is Red

Water for Elephants

Ender’s Game

Secret Life of Bees

Final Exam

Dave Barry’s Greatest Hits

Screwtape Letters

Atonement

Goldengrove

Catching Genius

A Thousand Splendid Suns

Currently Reading: White Man’s Burden

There's too many things that i haven't done yet

Too many sunsets

I haven't seen

You can't waste the day wishing it'd slow down

You would've thought by now

I'd have learned something I made up my mind when I was a young girl

I've been given this one world

I won't worry it away

But now and again I lose sight of the good life

I get stuck in a low light

But then Love comes in How far do i have to go to get to you

Many the miles

Many the miles

How far do I have to go to get to you

Many the miles

But send me the miles and I'll be happy to follow you love I do what i can wherever i end up To keep giving my good loveAnd spreading it aroundCause I've had my fair share of take care and goodbyesI've learned how to cryAnd I'm better for thatRed letter day and I'm in a blue moodWishing that blue would just carry me awayI've been talking to God don't know If it's helping or notBut surely something has got to got to got to giveCause i can't keep waiting to liveBeen talking to God don't know if it's helping or notMany the milesMany the milesHow far do i have to go to get to youMany the milesMany the milesOh send me the miles and I'll be happy toFollow you LoveThere's too many things i haven't done yetToo many sunsets i haven't seen

Five Months of Statistics

76 letters sent

151 days in country

641 days left

64 km from Lilongwe

182 square feet of my house

18 feet depth of my pit latrine

3 proposals for marriage

1 proposal to be the second wife

6 pairs of shoes brought to Malawi

1 pair actually worn

976 times I’ve answered the question, “Have you tasted nsima?”

977 confirmations I’ve tasted nsima, and can actually cook it

25 pounds lost

3 compliments telling me I’m fat

2 times I’ve been caught talking in my sleep... in Chichewa

Monthly Statistics

100 dollars budgeted

15 dollars spent on units

11 dollars spent on stamps

0 dollars spent on transportation (thanks to hitchhiking J)

75 Naglene’s (1 litre) consumed

2.6 Fanta’s

6 rolls of TP

½ box of curry powder

250 ml of cooking oil

Weekly Statistics

13-17 periods taught

5 tomatoes

4 eggs

¾ kg of rice

6 cups of tea

60 kwacha (43¢) of charcoal

2 sessions of laundry by hand

2-8 cockroach sightings

Daily Statistics

6 am wake up

8 pm bed time

10 hours of sleep

40 Litres of water used

1 meal cooked (I’m fed lunch at school)

3 donkeys sited in my back yard

I want to send my love to the world. To my family in the states. California, Kansas, New Jersey, Pennsylvania, Florida, Texas, etc. To my friends, at home and abroad. To Malawi. To my new family of Peace Corps volunteers here that give so much love and support to me. I have never really enjoyed Valentine's Day, but I am finding new meanings this year. Holidays don't feel like holidays here. It could be any other day of the year but it is all about how much we love others; not just a romantic love, but an undying love. A flame that never goes out. It grows and grows the more we share it, and soon we can't help but love every one and every thing we come in contact with.

My loves.

I have done a poor job of actually blogging about Malawi, and I have every intention of changing that today. This is the office in Lilongwe, where I can use Internet and pick up mail!

We spent 6 weeks living with a family in a village.

I lived in this grass hut, across from my host family's hut. It had a mattress on a mat, a little table for my things, and a chair to hold my water filter. We sleep under a net every night to prevent Malaria.

The floor of the hut is made of mud so every few weeks you have to smear more mud on. A REALLY fun project.

Dinner with the family on a mat. We ate with our hands, usually nsima (maize based- like dense mashed potatoes), tomatoes, and greens.

Women carry their babies on their back using a chitenji (piece of cloth). I did my student teaching at Linthipe Community Day Secondary School (CDSS). This was the first day of teaching.

Transport during training is in Peace Corps vehicles. We can fit 12 people in a land rover. After training, however, most volunteers hitchhike everywhere they go. We had training and first got a ride from a British expat to the market. On the way back, we rode one leg of the trip in a semi, the other in the back of the worlds smallest pickup truck.Around Thanksgiving I got really sick, possibly Giardia. I had to go to Lilongwe to see the doctors and be on medical hold until I got better.We swore in as official Peace Corps Volunteers December 9 at the home of the USA Ambassador. This is the director of PC Malawi and the ambassador.I moved to site the next day. This is my house in Dedza before the rainy season. Now everything is lush green and the fields are growing. Unfortunately I was only there until January, and moved to a new location in Dowa.For Christmas, Erica and I spent a day in Senga Bay until she was bit by a monkey. Christmas eve and day were spent in Lilongwe. I then went to Nkhata bay and Mzuzu with some friends for new years.

Hope that catches you up with a little of what happened Sept-Dec!

Happy 2009! I spent New Years with friends eating, dancing, and exploring new regions of Malawi. I continually feel blessed to be here in Malawi in part because of the location, fellow volunteers, and Malawian nationals who really make this place the warm heart of Africa.

I want to record my New Year's Resolution in a more public domain. I often consider myself a forthright person in my relationships with others and conversed today with a friend about my goals for the new year. I have created my resolution, and listed ways in which I plan on working towards it.

Discover and develop my relationship with God, free from religious obligations.

-Meditation before prayer

-Finish reading the Standard Works

-Solidify my personal ethics and morals

-Ask spiritual questions that are relevant to me

I just recently passed my two year mark as a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- day Saints. I have had a unique opportunity to be away from the Church for 3 months now and yet I haven't taken advantage of personal growth without daily influences of the Church. Many a Mormon will be nervous to hear that I am looking forward to this time away and some might even work to "intervene". Trust me. Love me. Let me be.

This resolution has also been influenced by the current book I am reading, Eat Pray Love. I knew about it this summer, but having read a lot of Emily Giffin, and not being a Thirty-something myself, wasn't ready to read another similar story. I am only a third through, but am appreciating it more and more. Elizabeth Gilbert has an incredible way of writing that is so natural and normal. Real emotions. Not overdone, not understated. Someone once described to me that getting married isn't about finding the right person, but it's about finding the right time. I think I'm going to use that philosophy in reading books as well. Sorry for mis-matched thoughts. Until next time.

Today I decided to write a book.

I will be writing it in the future months which will inevitably turn into years. Let me fill you in on how I came to this decision. I was alphabetizing novels in the fiction section at Barnes and Noble and stumbled across a book called Twenty Something around the letter H. I usually am too busy to read the short blirp on the back the summarizes the plot, but since I am a twenty something, I paused and read. The Author was a 25 year old graduate writing about roommates, dating, and work. Simple enough. Then it hit me like a lightening bolt. I CAN WRITE! Okay, maybe not well, but I can write. Maybe those A's I earned on my papers will translate into literary success. I made the decision right there that I would write a book about (my) life and travels. Writing this book isn't about being successful and making it to the best seller's list. Writing is about fulfilling a goal, sharing the little knowledge that I have, and giving a voice to a generation of twenty somethings who struggle with real life.

I then celebrated by purchasing 200 biodegradable tampons, men's deodorant, and a Costco hot dog. Life is good.

What a disappointment I must be to all of my loyal readers. Ok, so my family and a few friends. Since everyone returned, life has been normal with work and family time. My Dad and I went to see OneRepublic at the HOB downtown and I loved it!

My Dad and I share a love of music. It started when I was little and he would play Beatles and Beach Boys records for me. Now the tradition has been started to see concerts together. The big names have included Dixie Chicks, Jack Johnson, John Mayer, Ben Folds, and now OneRepublic.

I have also spent lots of my time here, at Torrey Pines Reserve State Beach. I went here as a child and it is the closest beach to my Brother's house. Don't worry, I have nice tan lines now that the sunburn has gone away.

I have fallen in love with a book. Just when I thought there was no salvation for my summer reading blues, I stumbled across Oxygen. Working at Barnes and Noble, I am fortunate to have access to advanced copies of books. They send them to book stores to be read and reviewed before the books are mass marketed. Oxygen came out this month and I would highly recommend it. It is about an anaesthesiologist working in Seattle and a malpractice suit that is filed. Its great writing that makes you think and it even has a twist ending. I have been hit by the summer flu. It spread like wildfire through our house, and I'm taking the brunt of it. You know its bad when you can't even smell the ounces you have put on your chest of this stuff.

I watched Into the Wild last night with a friend. The movie made me think a lot about my own life and where I'm at. If you haven't seen it or read the book, it is about a recent college graduate that leaves his life behind including money, ID's, etc and hits the road, eventually going to Alaska to live in the wilderness alone. This movie hit the spot to reflect a little more on where I am and where I want to go next. Even having gone to a conservative school like BYU, I still feel liberal in my thinking about the world and what it has to offer. I am living my own adventure and leaving things I care for deeply behind when I go to Africa. I am searching for knowledge about the world but more importantly about who I am. It is an uncomfortable place to be in. One where I feel vulnerable and alone. I'm crossing the bridge into adulthood but I don't know if I like what I see in the future. I am learning that my actions alone dictate the person I will become. I don't feel capable enough to be trusted with this immense power. How can someone with such little experience have faith that their decisions are the right ones?

And last but not least, 59 days! All my money is poured into purchases for Malawi. How do you pack for 2 years? I'm slowly learning the language, Chichewa, although I haven't been motivated to listen to the lessons online. I am preparing myself to say goodbye to a lot of people I love. To any Mormon, you can roll your eyes at my complaints of 2 years away from home. It is expected for boys to go on missions. It is daily life. But for me 2 years means so much more. I will miss marriages, births, deaths, milestones, and memories created by my family and friends. I can accept that. What I cannot accept is knowing how alone I might feel. I cannot accept the failure that might face me. I must strive in my work and be successful. I need to remember that Africa is so much more then just 2 years of my life. It is a journey that will change me forever. My priorities, the directions I take in my career, the type of person I choose to spend my life with, how I raise my kids. All of these things are at risk of change. I must learn to trust Africa with my goals, hopes, fears, and ambitions.

It sure is a beautiful place.

Here is how I spent last week while my bro and his wife traveled to Europe. I was left home alone with the 3 boys and had a long week ahead of me.

This is Baby. He can be adorable and cuddly or fussy and emotional. I like to catch him on the good days and overlook the bad ones.

Monday night we went to the beach for Family Home Evening. I got a Costco pizza, made homemade lemonade and chocolate chip cookies, and hit the sand.

Only one problem. It was high tide. There wasn't sand to play on.

So the kids ran around on the ramp and rocks, only resulting in one child loosing blood. Tuesday was happy Canada Day! Of course we had to celebrate Peter's heritage with hot dogs and RockBand. Laura and Peter...

Boredom kicked in by Wednesday, but I was entertained by Baby's many poses at lunch.

Who doesn't love a good Cheetos's face?Laura invited us to fireworks at the high school Thursday (the 3rd. My city missed the memo that it is the 4th of July).On Friday Baby and I went to the beach with Krystie, Troy, and Mike. Saturday was my last day of Mommy duty so we piled in the mini van and enjoyed bowling in Poway. Am I the only one that feels dirty walking into a bowling alley? Has anyone really been to a new bowling alley? I can't imagine the rich and famous bowling in a run down place. I want to find their alleys.

Life lessons I learned this week:

-Having children is a LOT of work. I keep reminding myself that they usually come one at a time, and with a husband.

- Birth control is a great option. Being Catholic tainted my views of birth control, but my perspective has changed.

- Children want love and attention. Baby would scream out whenever he couldn't find me... " MEA GAN" I think he was afraid I had abandon them all.

-Good sleep, or sleep at all, doesn't happen when you are a mom. I made the mistake of telling the kids that if they woke up in the middle of the night for any reason, to wake me up. That means that if they stirred at all, they came running. I would wake up every night to a new kid in my bed, and me urging them back into their own bed. I even had the opportunity to do laundry in the middle of the night when a bed was wet.

-A 2 year old can break an 8 year old's nose. Plastic golf club. - When a 6 year old is stubborn, but you are more stubborn, you can get them to eat grapes. Even if it takes 40 minutes.

-While you might have energy to make homemade lemonade and cookies at the beginning of the week, you will be running to McDonald's and Rubio's by the end of the week.

-Naps aren't long enough to finish laundry or dishes, but just long enough to catch up on shows you've Tivo'ed like "So You Think You can Dance" and "Kathy Griffin: My Life on the D List"

- I love my nephews. I wouldn't change them for the world. Being a mom is a great experience I'm sure, but being an Aunt is even better. There is nothing more wonderful when a child calls your name to comfort them when they are sad or hurt and being able to give them back at the end of the week.

I am a let down. I haven't posted in 2 weeks. And on top of this, I'm still unemployed. There is no good reason for my lack of writing except that I am kept busy by these guys.

Before I moved in with my brother and his family, I asked Sadie's brother, Blars, if there was anything he learned while he stayed with them. Apparently a year of living under the same roof taught him the important lesson of birth control. I'm getting it now. I love them to death, but being a full time mom should not be in my cards for YEARS and I'm perfectly ok with that.

Africa Update: 90 days to go! I go through spurts of being super excited and completely forgetting about it. I can't believe how quickly time seems to be going this summer. I wish I could slow it down and enjoy it because before I know it, I'll be posting from the Warm Heart of Africa (Malawi's nickname). I met another guy going in my same group and have been chatting with him. I feel so much better knowing someone that is going with me. It should make the transition much easier. I've also started purchasing the necessities I'll have to take to Africa. After coming up with a spread sheet of things to buy, I am definitely up for taking donations. I'm becoming a regular at REI. Who would have thought it would cost so much to go to Africa? Not I, the poor unemployed recent grad.

I had been bit by the reading bug, but all of a sudden I can't really get into a book. I joined goodreads.com (you should too!) and I love it, but I still have no desire to find a new book. Any suggestions? I'm incredibly picky, but if you have a good read for me, let me know. xoxo-meagan

Here are some of my favorite hits this month, just in case you want to check them out.

They are playing on the blog, in the right column.

I'm Yours

by Jason Mraz

I just got his new album and since it is the only CD in my car, it oftentimes gets turned on when all of the radio stations are full of talk and commercials. This is a song that I put on repeat to learn the words and sing along. My favorite line is It's your God-forsaken right to be loved"

Knock 'em Out

by Lily Allen

If you need a good laugh, turn to Lily Allen. It is hysterical with its funny commentary and her British accent.

Viva la Vida

by Coldplay

If you know me really well, and I mean really well, you would know that I love any song that has string instruments and piano. Coldplay always comes through.

The OneRepublic Album

I'm getting ready to see them in concert come July with my Dad, so I have been listening to their whole album and there isn't one song I skip, which is saying something from an ADD music listener.

Lets Get Ready to Crumble

by The Russian Futurists

Get excited for something different. I am not a fan of the 80's, but it seems that this song with its old school beat adds a little spring to my step.

Headsprung

by LL Cool J

I rediscovered this old hit recently and found it very motivational when running. I can only really listen to 45 seconds of it because it is so repetitive, but it is a great 45 seconds to have when you are running up a hill.

Tambourine

by Eve

I just heard this song for the first time, but I like it so much it is lucky enough to be added to this list. It reminds me of "shake it 'n giggle it" song that my friend Alan introduced me to. I instantly got up and started shake it with my little 2 year old nephew. He got a laugh and then stood up to dance with me. Just make sure you get the edited version. I don't know what the unedited version says, but you might as well be safe about it.

Breathe In

by Frou Frou

Just one of those great songs that is versatile. If you need a little cry you don't feel too guilty doing it to this song, or if you are driving down the coast with the ocean breeze tossing your hair around you can be sure that it will put a little smile on your face.

So after receiving my call to MALAWI, I was asked to write an aspiration statement for the headquarters in Malawi since they have never met me and have no idea what I am about. It tells you a little about how I decided to apply to the Peace Corps and what I hope to accomplish. Enjoy! Although the instructions for this statement were brief, I will educate you on my hopes and aspirations as I prepare to leave for Malawi in September. I started the application process two years ago after searching for something more to add to my life. My best friend at the time suggested the Peace Corps and I, having no idea what the Peace Corps was, investigated the cause. I had been looking for something a little more immediate, but had only finished my sophomore year at Brigham Young University. Throughout the past two years things had changed in various ways but one thing remained the same, I wanted to help the world. I graduated at 20 after working hard to rush through my education, but I wasn't ready to start a career in one set field. I look at the Peace Corps as an opportunity to give back for all the blessings of education and support I have had in my life. I look at it as a way to see the world, and step outside my comfort zone. I look at it as an opportunity to become a not necessarily better, but different person who is more culturally aware of the world and its needs. I also see the Peace Corps as a time to figure out what I want to do for a career and the next step I want to take: Masters, teaching, public health, etc. I absolutely love science and have this theory that if more people were educated from around the world and not just in the USA, Japan, UK, etc, we would find cures and treatments far more readily then we can now with only a minute portion of the population working. Who says there isn't a Mozart, Picasso, Einstein, or Sinatra in Malawi or any other third world country who because of their current political and economical situation, can't develop their talents and share them with the world? I want to bridge the gap and make a difference, even if it is just in one person's life.

Check out this article. It was an interesting commentary I came across about prostitution. The author is a guy leaving for the Peace Corps & he wrote it in his college newspaper column.

After four years at the Y, and during the crucial ages of 16-20, a big part of my heart belongs in Utah. Everyone can't wait to get out and move on to bigger and better things and I too have been one of those people. Now that I'm back to collect my things and migrate to San Diego, leaving Utah doesn't sound so great. My life has been here; everywhere I look I think of the memories I've created. I stopped by my old house and although it has only been four weeks since I lived there, I deperately miss the breeze through my curtains, the old yellow stove, and the love that radiated from 5 beautiful and strong willed sisters. The feelings will dwindle as time moves on, but right now it is a hard moment to be in. We have all been separated and are moving in different directions, and mine is towards Malawi, Africa in September. Life will be good.

PS I have a working cell phone again, so text away!

My family goes through cell phones like they are going out of style. Whether it is dropped in the pool (twice), or a bucket of soapy water when washing the car, or when it is stolen, dropped, lost, or gone through the washing machine, someone always needs a new phone. Now it is my turn (again). I slammed my cell phone in the car door on accident. My screen is now a pretty white and black picture of what I will title, "Shatter from the Bottom Left Corner". Here then is the moral of the story...

DON'T TEXT ME - I can't see it, or respond to it, so save me the sanity and just don't send me a message

When you call, LEAVE A MESSAGE - If I don't pick up, I can't see who called but I can check voice mail so leave a message. That way I don't wonder who made my light flash red.

If anyone has an old sprint phone, let me know. I only need it until September anyways, so it seems a waste to buy a brand new one for 4 months.

Love you from Arizona,

Meagan

I don't know who reads, but I'm confessing. I am the first to admit that my life changes more quickly then most other people's. One day I'm living in Utah, the next California. Biotech sounds great, but then again so does living on a research vessel in Alaska. Single, dating, single, dating, single again; I get a lot of slack for not knowing what I want. I meant it with all seriousness when I wrote my blog title, "A girl lost in transition between childhood and the vast world of independence".

There is so much that I don't know:

-Where I want to live

-Who I want to be with

-What job I want

-How I want to spend the next 4 months

But I figured I would start with what I did know, from an entry into my journal on April 14th, my favorite day of the year.

"I am Meagan Victoria and I am a daughter of Heavenly Father. He loves me and I love him everyday. My self worth is not defined by the people around me. I am capable of accomplishing whatever I put my mind to so long as I a give a sincere effort and depend on the Lord's help. My progress cannot and will not be hindered by another individual because I will not give them that power. I may not know myself now, but I will strive everyday to listen to my Father's guidance and learn who I am as well as my divine mission on this Earth. I will serve those around me because they too are Divine beings and my brothers & sisters in Christ."

I'm starting somewhere, aren't I?

Hello from California! After graduation, I had an amazing dinner with my closest friends and family. The list included my mom, dad, bonnie, Marji, Collin my brother, my four roommates and a boyfriend of Tori, Miguel Cano, Alan Babcock, Scott Wiest, Andrew Bennett, Zac Whittaker, and myself. We went to Ottavio's and I had the chance to say thank you to all of them for the support they have given me over the past four years.

Saturday I got in the car with Mom and Marji and drove down to California. We stopped in every major city we came to for bathroom and potty breaks. We also stopped in Zion's to take a bus tour of the national park. It was a reminder of my trip to Utah to go to college. Mom and I had stopped in Zion's and hiked on the way up, and now I was doing it on the way back. The drive took a total of 15 hours with our stops, so we were home by 8 pm that night and all the kids came over to visit. Exhaustion had set in.

Sunday I went to church, and then Kyle came to visit the family. We made dinner for everyone and hung out. Monday Kyle, Mom, and I cleaned out the garage in preparation for a garage sale tomorrow. Tuesday mom had surgery, so we took her down to the hospital and met up with my dad at Starbucks. Kyle and I went to the zoo after and walked around the whole park in 3 hours. It was really fun to see the animals at the zoo I have grown up with my whole life. The weather was beautiful and warm with a cool breeze. Here is a picture outside my favorite exhibit.

We went back the hospital to check up on mom and everything went well. Her spirits were high after the three hour surgery. Kyle then came with me to the beach to hang out with my brother's family. Everyone seemed to like him so it was nice to hang out together. Kyle had a job interview the next day so he left that night and I stayed at my brothers. Several trips later to the hospital, mom came home yesterday and is doing alright. She will be out of work for 6 weeks and I'm playing nurse for a while. My life consists of packing, cleaning, organizing, and job hunting. I have an offer from a biotech company in Denver, but I don't think I'm going to take it. I don't think I would enjoy the work I would be doing because I would have to stand the whole time and the pay isn't very good. Anyways, that is my life update! I would be surprised if anyone read the whole thing.