Okay, so I haven't really kept up the blog lately. I apologize.Here is a little video that I made to recap my last year... my 28th. Here's hoping 29 will be just as great!

After leaving Korea I spent about 6 weeks backpacking Asia...Korea, (new years in Japan,) China, Hong Kong, Singapore, Vietnam, Cambodia and Thailand

Here are a couple of my favorite videos from this past year in Korea (I lived alone and far away from my friends... I had a lot of free time during the week!) :)

For New Years I needed, well, something New. Korea is no longer foreign. It's home. I needed to feel the unfamiliar again.

So I took a quick trip to Japan.

I was supposed to be at work. All the Koreans were on vacation but us dirty foreigners are required to sit at school and look busy all day. They were nice enough to send someone everyday to have me sign an attendance sheet. So, other than a few random administrative people, my school was a ghost town.

So I had to choose. Stay at school and get paid to take a nap OR turn off my cell phone, don't show up at all, hop a ferry to Japan for a long weekend and get thoroughly bitched out and have my pay docked when I got back. Hmmm, follow the rules or go on a little adventure. I choose (and always will) the latter!

So three friends and I set sail for Japan! Having heard rumors of how expensive Japan can be, we decided to not travel far and stay relatively close to Korea. So we arrived in Fukoka and ventured off to Hiroshima.

It was amazing how totally and utterly lost I was in Japan. In Korea, even though I have no idea what is happening around me, I can't speak and hardly understand the language, it's a familiar inability to communicate. In Japan, it was starting over. All the little things were complicated again, like not knowing what a taxi is called or what hand gesture you use to hail one.... and none of us knew which side of the car to get in... never thought about the Japanese driving on the left!!

I only know a few words in Japanese: kon'nichiwa (hello) and domo arigato (thank you very much). The latter of which I could neither hear nor say without immediately making little robot arms and mumbling "... Mr. Roboto" under my breath!! It was definitely instant culture shock when we got to Japan... and it was fantastic!!

Hiroshima is a beautiful city, almost poetically so. It was such a (literal) breath of fresh air to be in such a clean, modern city, with wide roads and nice buildings... then you'd remember why Hiroshima is so new and the horror and atrocities responsible for it's new young appearance made your heart ache. You (as an American) almost felt compelled to walk around an apologize to everyone you saw.

Most places were closed on New Years so we spent New Years Day bonding. And how else do you bond with your friends other than strip down naked in public and spend several hours outside in the frigid weather, lounging in hot springs. None of us are particularly modest girls... but there was that first awkward moment when standing in the locker room in your underwear where you decide to count to 3 and everyone strips together and everyone just hurry up and look so we don't have to feel weird anymore. Though, you quickly forget you (and the hundred other women) are naked and we just had a blast at the bath house!!

We then ventured down to Miyajima which was by far the best part of the trip. I wish we had known what an amazing little island it was so we could have spent more time there. Miyajima is famous for it's Torri Gate especially during high tide when it appears to be floating on water. Of course, it was low tide when we were there. Though it was actually really incredible to be able to walk up to the gate (if you are willing to get muddy and seaweedy).

Then there was the food!!! Oh, Japan! How happy you made my taste buds! I had forgotten how delicious food could taste! It was amazing! Unlike my current culinary conundrum, there is more than one flavor in Japan.... there were thousands! Every meal made me giddy with delight!

It didn't take long to get on an "I hate Korea" kick. I loved everything about Japan! The food, the cleanliness and order, the sleeping arrangements (both countries sleep on the floor, but Koreans sleep on a flat blanket and the Japanese lay out a futon and a duvet!), the people (the Japanese were so cool! Overall Koreans are pretty vanilla. Everyone has the same haircut, their natural color or dyed a slightly brownish color, clothes are frumpy and dull, and self expression is non-existent. The Japanese are awesome. Everyone has crazy dyed hair, punk clothes, and a personal style that is solely Japanese. It's far more fashion forward and self expressive than anything I've seen in the States.) I loved everything about Japan.

I was around Architecture again! Oh creativity and expression... I've missed you! Every building was unique and definitively Japanese, both old and new. Modern Japanese architecture is personally my favorite aesthetic. Korean architecture is, well honestly, non-existent. They have lots and lots of temples, but they are all the same. If you've seen one, you've pretty much seen them all. Modern architecture in Korea consists of condo buildings... Always rectangular, always windows on one side only, always painted tan or off-white... now repeat 10 million times!

We finished our trip with a quick late night visit to Hiroshima Castle then a train ride back to Fukoka to catch our ferry.

My Korea hating quickly went away while buying the train ticket. A one hour train ride on the bullet train costs roughly $100. For that much money, you can take Korea's high speed train from the northern to southern tip of the country... TWICE and still have enough money left over for lunch and a cab ride back to your apartment! They weren't kidding when they said Japan was expensive! Sheesh! Now I remember why I picked Korea in the first place... because it's cheaper than Japan!

We got to Fukoka at midnight and had 7 hours to kill before our ferry back to Korea. We wandered the streets for a solid 3 hours, found a 24 place to eat and loitered there for a good 2 and a half and finally decided to just go to the ferry terminal. Too bad it was still closed and in an isolated part of town. Nothing tops off a great vacation like napping in sub-freezing temperatures, like a homeless person, in front of a public building.

And my school never did notice I didn't show up to work, so I got paid to go to Japan!!

Here is why Korea is confusing:

BB: When is the last day of class?

Koreans: Dec. 23

BB: That's the last day??

K: Yes.

BB: When does the new school year start?

K: March 1

BB: March? Same as last year.

K: Yes

BB: So last class Dec 23, next class March 1???

K: Yes.

BB: And I have camps in Jan ?

K: Yes

BB: and nothing in Feb?

K: No

BB: What is in Feb?

K: class

BB: huh?

K: classes in Feb

BB: more camps?

K: no, real school

BB: last day dec 23?

K: yes

BB: frist day march 1?

K: Yes

BB: sooooo.... no class in feb?

K: No.

..... AAAAHHHHH I give up!!!

It's like Abbot and Costello except in broken Engrishee!!!

When I'm traveling I always want the window seat. I can sleep anywhere but rarely do I sleep in cars, buses or trains.

One reason I love to travel is because I want to see everything. The main attractions, the back roads, the big cities, the small farms, the good, the bad and the ugly. I never want to sleep when traveling because I feel like I'll miss something. That as soon as my eyes are closed, something breathtaking will slip by me and an opportunity to see something amazing will be lost forever. Rarely has this ever really been the case.

Until Korea.

It was March or April of this year and I was going to Gyeongju (about 45 min from my town) to visit Lindsey and Jeff. I had only been on the train a few minutes and was in my comfy window seat position: ipod on, seat reclined, foot rest up (Korean trains are incredibly comfortable) and elbow against the window, bracing my head as I stared aimlessly at the passing scenery, which was finally starting to change from brown to green. Then, out of no where, I saw it. Just for a second. A giant golden Buddha statue, towering over the tree tops, sparkled in the spring light like a giant golden beacon. Then just as quickly as I saw it, it disappeared.

What the??? What was that? Where are we?

I think we are still close to my town! I could have missed it!!!!

For months and months I've been meaning to find that temple. Not really knowing what to search for, I finally googled: Giant golden Buddha Yeongcheon and an article about "Manbulsa" came up. I searched for Manbulsa and found their website. A few weeks ago I finally made it to this temple. (It only took me until December!) Warwick came with me.

We went in the late afternoon so by the time we made it to the top of the hill, where the Amitabha Buddha or Big Buddha was, the sun was setting on him in the most beautiful way. The Amitabha is over 30 meters tall which is almost 10 stories high! Even in the pictures it loses its enormity since the scale is lost unless you are standing directly under it.

Me in front of Amitabha Buddha. The scale is somewhat lost in this picture. When next to it, I am shorter than the stone wall in the background!!!!

Inside the main temple

Nirvana Buddha

Warwick getting some sunset pictures

the graveyard and tombstones at the temple

Yesterday, Kim Dong-Uk informed me that our last day of school is 3 weeks away. While I couldn't be more thrilled, I am starting to get sentimental. I'm actually going to really miss these kids.

As I looked around my classrooms today I saw so many familiar little faces... but very few familiar names!

With 45% of Koreans having the last name of "Kim" "Lee" or "Park", and just about every kid has "Min, Ming, or Yeong" somewhere in their name. So, trying to remember 800 little Kim Yeong-Su, Park Min-Jung, Lee Ming-Na, Kim Min-Ju, Park Yeong-Jin, Park Min-Na, Lee Yeong-Ju, and every other possible combination was clearly impossible from day one.

My elementary school students never made English names of their own and even if they had, with 800 different kids a week, I'd still hardly recognize most of them. There are a select handful of students that stand out, for various reasons, and I took it upon myself to give them nicknames... though, only in my head. Here are a few of my favorites:

Lollipop 1 and 2: See previous post.

CLICK HERE

Pringles: She fed me Pringles and chocolate for an entire hour on the way to our field trip in April. Girl sure knows how to win the teacher's affection!

Jazz Hands: Flamboyant chubby kid who loves to sing and is the only one to ever volunteer to act anything out. I love him.

Sunshine & Kirsten: Sunshine purely because she is one of those kids that lights up your day and Kirsten, for no reason in particular, she reminds me of a cousin of mine.

Jesus: Probably one of the top 5 most annoying kidson the planet. Every time I'm around him all that goes through my head is "Jesus.... kill me now!!!" This kid has the uncanny ability to yell "Teacher teacher teacher teacher" for 40 minutes straight while jumping in his chair, crawling under desks, or running in circles. And he just happens to be the smartest kid I teach. He also lives in my building and recites my address in English every time I pass by him... weirdo.

Pixie: She's half the weight and a head shorter than every other student her age, so is her little sister. She has the squeakiest little voice and she is absolutely beautiful.  She looks like she belongs in a fairy tale. 

Shit for brains: This name has nothing to do with his intelligence but rather this incident: 

CLICK HERE

Ms. President: Every kid in her class had their picture on the wall and under it was written what they want to be when they grow up. All the girls said "I want to be a Pop-star or mother." All the boys said, "I want to be a Pop-star or Soccer player"... except for her. She said, "I WILL be President."

So, there are two little boys in one of my fourth grade classes that I've affectionately nicknamed, "the lollipop guild" though no real resemblance to the Wizard of Oz characters.

They get their nickname from their overall appearance. They look like two little lollipops. Enormous heads, plus a bushel of thick back hair, on little bodies that are no more than 1/2 the width of those domes of theirs. And they are both about a foot shorter than any other student in class.

If that was it I would just call them lollipops. But they come as a team, hence the guild. They are attached at the hip. Always together. Actually, a little too together. Always sitting on each others laps, giving each other back rubs, they sit next to each other and usually have their arms around each other as they work, and sometimes they are practically dry humping each other.

Seeing these two boys interact each week has made me aware of and intensely frustrated by part of my American heritage and culture that apparently has been ingrained into my psyche:

I immediately think these boys are gay.

But, they don't have "gay" here in Korea.

I remember the Iranian president, Ahmadinejad, once saying they don't have gay people in Iran. I remember thinking, "what a jackass". Well Korea is also one of those "there are no gay people here" countries. At first I was immensely annoyed by the blatant disregard and omittance of gay individuals here. Though, now, my feelings toward their head-in-the-sand approach to homosexuality has changed somewhat.

When I was teaching at an all boys middle school I very quickly noticed, on the very first day, that the boys were incredibly affectionate with each other. Though, they were also constantly punching, kicking, tackling each other, I'd also see them resting their heads on a friends shoulder if they were tired, arms wrapped around each other to brace themselves on the bus, and rubbing a friends shoulders after judo class. It didn't take long to realize that even though this "no gays in Korea" mentality has a plethora of negative consequences, there was one very good outcome: No homophobia. None.

In America, we make concrete gender lines from birth. Actually, we make them pre-natal. You are born as a pink or a blue. Little boys wear blue clothes and play with trucks and guns. If a boy puts on something pink, or god forbid, picks up a doll, he is immediately stamped as "gay". Fathers try their damnedest to prevent anyone from thinking their boy might grow up to be gay and will try to make them Über masculine. "Boys don't cry" "don't be a sissy" "Shake it off" etc is pummeled into little boy brains.  Toddlers that can barely string together a cohesive sentence know what is culturally acceptable based on their gender. Go to a 3 year-old's birthday party and give out pink and blue party favors, if the only favor left is a pink one, do you think that little boy isn't going to break down in tears???

I'm about as for gay rights as they come. I don't care what your sexuality is and honestly I don't want to hear about your sex life no matter what your preference, whether you're gay, straight, bi, transsexual, a-sexual, or into extra-terrestrials. I don't care.

Now that I've been here 9 months I think back to when I got here and how I thought Korea really needed to reevaluate it's attitude towards homosexuality. Now I'm starting to think that it's me, and my entire American culture, who needs to reevaluate the thinking process behind what is actually normal affectionate human interaction...  though, seriously kid, stop dry humping your friend's leg!

Yesterday, it was time for my after school class and in walks my most frustrating student. He was early.

He's really not a bad kid (some of them really are) he's just legitimately hyperactive. His mind and his body are all over the place. (For the first 15 min of class he stabbed 3 rocks with scissors. Though, he gave me the rocks as a gift after class.)

This kid just has a fire in his eyes, you can see that he's actually a pretty good student, if you can just reel him in... which is easier said than done when you don't speak his language. He and I have come a long way lately. We are finally used to each other and I'm starting to see a lot of progress... anyway...

He walks in and instead of immediately muttering obscenities at him (no need to do it under my breath here, he can't understand me) I instead decide to greet him.

Brit: "Hello, how are you?"

Kid: ...???...   (blank stare, I swear I can hear crickets)

Brit: (I try again. 37 weeks of the same thing... he should know this by now) "How... are... you? Happy? (I point to my big cheesy grin) Sad? (now I pretend to cry) Angry?" (I start growling at him and shaking my head)

Kid: (he starts stomping and flailing his arms while growling and shaking his head wildly)

Brit: "You're angry?"

Kid: (Jumps up and down nodding)

Brit: "Why?"

Kid: (Wraps his arms around his stomach and bends over moaning)

Brit: "You are sick?" (Makes sense, everyone is out with some flu or cold)

Kid: (Again jumps up and down while nodding)

Brit: "Oh, that's too bad. (a vocabulary phrase he should know) You have a stomach ache? "  ( I point to my stomach)

Kid: "No, teacher...." he actually says and takes the marker out of my hand and starts to draw on the marker board.

I'm intrigued and stand there while he draws his ailment on the board only to burst out into laughter when I realize he drew a big pile of crap!!!

Brit: (still laughing) "Oh, no!"

Kid: (laughing while holding his stomach and moaning in agony) "Oooh no, teacher...."

We both stood there laughing while the rest of the class showed up. He was actually really good in class... once he stopped stabbing those rocks.

...So that the next time, when I meet a guy in a bar, and he asks me out for coffee the next day, the only clean clothes I have won't be a t-shirt that says,

 "Cheap and cute but you get what you pay for."Hmm.... 

Well, he should consider it fair warning!

In a conversation with my sister last night, I was reminded of just how different we truly are.

The topic of "china" entered the conversation. My mind immediately envisioned strapping on my backpack and trekking The Great Wall, hopping on and off crowded trains and sampling the unique culture and food

She was thinking more along the lines of picking up a laser scanner and trekking through Macy's trying to dodge the crowds while searching for the perfect pattern of Wedgwood on which to serve food.

I have received several comments from coworkers on how "cute" I look today. This makes me giggle. Mostly because to me, I look ridiculous!

I am no fashionista, most will attest to that, particularly my sister who has, on several occasions, literally pulled me back into the house while saying, "I'm not letting you leave the house looking like that!!"

On a good day, I'm a plain Jane, jeans and a t-shirt and I'm good to go.

During my vacation in America this past summer, I bought lots of clothes including several "Korean looking" dresses. Ah, what does "Korean looking" mean? In a nutshell it means ridiculous.

Here is a little input into the Korean world of fashion:

Men: pretty much in sync with what is going on in the US (sans anything in the hiphop or rap realm).

Women:

-It's a little bit 1st grade (Hello Kitty or Mickey Mouse is completely acceptable to have on your socks, purse, jeans,... anything)

-It's a little bit early 1990's (lots of busy floral patterns, floppy neck bows, lots of ruffles and frills, and all things bedazzled)

-It's a little bit "Little House On The Prairie"... Cleavage is a no-no (probably because there isn't any here!) so necklines rarely go past the collarbone and usually don't even go past the throat. They also keep their arms covered almost all the time. So from neck to wrist they are covered in trance inducing ruffly floral patterns... just add a bonnet and Young-jin could totally be Laura Ingles! Come to think of it, she derived her English name "Anne" from the book "Anne of Green Gables" which is pretty damn accurate. Well, if Young-jin is Laura Ingles then Min-jung is definitely Nelly Olsen!

and lastly...

-It's a little bit "potato sack meets street walker". Most of the clothes are shapeless sacks. Over sized, unflattering, and overpriced! (Not to mention mistranslated!) Though, I am a little bit envious of not being able to partake in this aspect of their fashion. Most single Korean women in their 20's are so damn thin that they can get away with wearing a burlap sack and still look smoking hot... and they do. Well, a floral ruffly burlap sack anyway.

And what these women lack in cleavage, they make up for in legs. And they work it!! Hard! In the US, the length of their skirts coupled with the height of their heels translates directly to hooker! Skirts so short I'm pretty sure they have to coordinate their bikini waxing with their outfits! And again, I'm envious. Not only because I don't have the legs to pull it off, but because I have a skirt handicap... it's called an ass!

Western women can't wear skirts that short. The extra volume from our butt causes our skirts to rise a few inches in the back. The more ass you have, the more it rides up in the back. So our skirts have to be long enough in the front to keep our cheeks covered in the back. Not the case with Korean women since the vast majority have no butts. Their legs go from toes to torso with not so much as the slightest bump of a bum to get in the way.

So today I wore one of my "Korean looking" dresses to work. It's a short, somewhat shapeless sleeveless dress. It has a checkered, almost plaid pattern with a big floppy collar and big blue buttons. It's navy, red, and tan and I wore black tights and a brown long sleeve shirt under it. (matching or even coordinating isn't something anyone here bothers to do so why should I?).

I was too damn lazy to wash my hair this morning so I took a few barrettes and clipped it all to the top of my head in a very "Sunday morning walk of shame" type of manner. Though my coworkers like when I wear my hair up because it shows off the "shape" of my head. Apparently to Koreans, I have a very desirable head shape.

So yeah, lots of compliments on how I look today. They say, "cute"... I say, "10 year old clown the morning after a 3 day meth bender".

But whatever, cultural difference I guess!

Kim Dong Uk: What am I doing? What is this called?

(as he quickly bends and releases his middle finger using his thumb)

Britne: Flick.

KDU: Flick? So, I'm Flick-ing?

Britne: Yes, that is a flick, so you are flicking.

KDU:  Okay.Britne:  ???

...later that day...

KDU: Okay class, lets play the memory game with a partner. Say your vocabulary words and take turns adding more words.... Oh, if your partner forgets a word, please flick them in the forehead.

hahaha! Oh, Korea! God love ya!

Why?

Because today I wore socks to work.

There is a direct correlation between my happiness and amount of airflow accessible to my little toes.  

Today was also the first day since May where I didn't have a single bead of sweat drip down my back.  And this is not a good thing.   I love the heat.  It makes me feel alive.  What I don't like is the frigid mind numbing winters that Korea has... and I can feel it in the air, it's almost here!  I've hardly been able to enjoy fall (which is typically my favorite season) because with every big breezy gust of wind, I can't help but think that a few weeks from now, those big gusts are going to knock the wind out of me and have me shivering in my office praying for someone to turn on the heat.

Oh well... c'est la vie.  There is nothing I can do about it.

Oh, but to rub salt in my already foot stifled day,  I had to give another teacher seminar today.  It was the second day of my third series of seminars.  Out of the ten or so participants only 3 ever bothered to speak, at all.  One of the mute ones did eventually speak.  He only said one sentence...  "You look very tired." Great.  Thanks.  That's the polite way of saying "you look like shit."   And I got 10 hours of sleep last night.   Go figure!

Okay, well I'm not really selling anything... except for maybe sunshine and happiness!

Because today is that day.

That day that happens about twice a year.

The day when I wake up rested and happy. The other 363 days I wake up groggy. It doesn't matter how much sleep I get; 6 hours, 8 hours, 12 hours, it makes no difference. Last night I went to bed at 3am and woke up perky and ready to go at 7:30am!

This is what it must feel like to be a morning person. I envy them. Life would be so much better if there were more days like today.

Today all my classes were great. Whether that was a change in the students or a change in me, I don't know. I played more with the kids, we had fun and joked around. I had lots of giggly conversations with my co-teachers.

I want to become a morning person. I am usually energetic and happy, it just doesn't happen until much later in the day. Then no one is around and my positive vibes are wasted.

How can I be a morning person? Is there some night-owls anonymous that I can take? Any voo-doo rituals? I'll shave my head and chant jibberish at a shrine to David Hasselhoff if that's what it takes!

Any ideas? Anyone?

I have exciting news! I can read!!!

...sorta.

I went to Daegu today. When I walked by the movie theater I decided to check out what was playing so I started to play my usual game of: Match the crazy Korean characters. It's sort of like mixing an ink blot test with the memory game. I give names to the Korean letters I see on the marquee then try to match them to the movie posters. For example:

ㄹ would be "snake"

있 would be "winking face with mustache"

옷 would be "vitruvian man"

ㅈ would be "decapitated vitruvian man"etc...

So I started to play using the word "바스터즈" but then I stopped. I thought, "No, Britne. C'mon,you can do this. Sound it out." So I gave it a shot.

buh.buh-ah. buh-ah-shh-eh. buh-ah-shh-eh-tuh-eo-...b-a-sh-et-eo...baseteo...baster...bastard... Bastard... BASTARD!

It's Inglorious Basterds! I did it! I read it in Korean!!! So I preceded to do my butt wiggling little happy dance in the middle of a crowd of Koreans while I muttered "Bastard! Bastard! Bastard! Whoo hoo!"

Too bad though, it was in the "Coming Soon" section.

Oh well, maybe next time!

Okay, I'll admit it. Today I was just being lazy. 

I didn't want to get up this morning so I just rolled out of bed, threw my hair in a ponytail, picked my jeans up off the floor, grabbed a carrot for lunch (yeah, sad huh?) and ran right out the door.

So I was sitting around my office, chatting with a few ladies, eating apples with toothpicks... like ya do... and in their conversation I heard one of them mutter "Buh-rit-tuh-ne... blah blah blah".

I look up from my apple-on-a-stick and give them the "I know you are talking about me, so spill it..." look.

They giggle for a second and say, "You changey your hair. It is very beautiful today."

I was perplexed by this statement because all I could think was... you mean this greasy mess I call a ponytail?... and as that thought was crossing my mind, one of the women says, "Your brain shape changey."

Hmmmm.  Interesting.  Very possibly true.  I mean, your brain is a muscle right? Mine  has been getting a lot of exercise lately from constant Sudoku puzzles. And when I exercise my ass muscles, my ass shape definitely changes.... so maybe this applies to my brain too!!

Damn, I have the tightest brain in Yeongcheon!

Before moving to Korea, I had only seen one Audrey Hepburn movie.

When I moved to Charlotte I didn't have TV and I only owned 3 or 4 dvds, so I'd walk to the library and check out their classic movies and "Roman Holiday" happened to be in their selection.

But thanks to Korea's Donga Network and someone's obsession with Audrey Hepburn in the late night programming department, I have now seen the following:

"Roman Holiday"

"Funny Face"

"Sabrina"

"Breakfast at Tiffany's"

"My Fair Lady"

There seems to be a recurrent theme in most of these movies. She starts off with long hair and at some point cuts her long trusses and becomes beautiful and adored by all. It really says something about how strikingly beautiful you are when a pixie haircut enhances your looks!

Unfortunately, I find most of the characters she plays in these movies obnoxious and annoying however, I'm absolutely enamoured with Audrey Hepburn herself. I guess that speaks volumes about how adorably likeable she was and why she remains one of the most popular actresses of all time.

Though I must say, I really love "Roman Holiday" and "Sabrina".....

and I'm sure will see them 50 more times before I leave Korea.

Things that I do now, that I never did before Korea:

squeegee the floor after every showerroll up my pants before going into a bathroomduck when turning on a bathroom sinkonly eat the inside of grapes and leave behind little purple grape carcases contemplate my options at toilet paper vending machineshear the difference between "Hyundai" and "Haeundae"refer to kimchi as "pretty good"drink aloe juice, and like it.use words like "pagey" "changey" and "lunchy"get annoyed if I have to pay more than 2200 won ($2.20) for a taxiconsider "hello kitty" socks + flip flops acceptable business footwearPush when I want to Pull, Pull when I would Push, Lift when I want to Lower, Twist when I would Close... every instinct is opposite here!Alpha-numeric Sudoku. I've become a sudoku wizard! 9x9 puzzles with just numbers no longer cut it. I've moved on to 16x16 with letters and numbers. It's definitely a challenge. They should keep me busy for the next month or so... after that, no idea how I'll entertain myself at work.

so many options... what to choose, what to choose?

My two adorable co-teachers Young-jin (Anne) and Dong-uk (Will)...

Anne was exausted and having a hard time staying awake. She asked Will for help

They decided to play Kai, Bai, Boe (Korean version of rock, paper, scissors) except, the loser of each game gets whacked in the head with the big plastic mallet!

It's actually a pretty effective method for waking someone up!

... and what an awesome shirt you have there, Will! Who could have possibly given you such a great shirt???

In one of my 6th grade classrooms the kids have painted pictures of : "What did you do on your summer vacation?"

I wasn't there when these were painted so I can't be 100% sure as to what the images are, but I can make some pretty good guesses: I went to the beach, I picked apples, I chased dragonflies, etc.

Except for the one on the top row, second from the right...

..."I was caught crossing the border to the North, thrown into a POW camp and forced to do hard labor" ????Hmmm... had no idea Lara Ling and Euna Lee were in my 6th grade class!

Soap and paper towels!!!It just so happens that Koreans are paranoid, actually, downright petrified of H1N1. So much so that they've even gone so far as to, dare I say it, install soap and paper towels in the bathrooms!!! I have been here 7 months now. Last month the soap and paper towels showed up in my school. I've kept soap and hand sanitizer at my desk for months but have managed to stay constantly sick while living here. All of a sudden, I've gone an entire month without a cold!! And the only thing that changed, is they taught the kids (and co-teachers) to wash their hands!so I ask you this...

Swine flu and Britne's health: Coincidence or divine intervention?

Got ready for bed, did a little painting to wind myself down, caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror as I walked by...

"WTF?!?!" I thought.

Ahhhh... totally forgot I painted that on when I was talking to my mom on skype!  

Hmmm, hope that comes off easily.  Probably should have thought about that before giving myself the mustache.   

Now, where's my red wig... ?

do students, when playing an alphabet game dealing with animal names,  come up with "dinosaur" and "ox" when we get to the letters "D" and "O"...

But when the category changes to food and the letters "D" and "O" come up again, they all start screaming, "DOG"  and  "OCTOPUS!!!"

Bleh!

There is this one little girl in one of my 4th grade classes that comes up to me every single week and badgers me with questions in Korean.  She eventually gets frustrated at my lack of understanding and wanders off.  So last week she came up to me and asked the following question in Korean:

Her: 한국말 하실 줄 아세요?  (hangukmal hasil jul aseyo?) Do you speak Korean?Me:  No.

She gives up after this first question, gives a big huff as she shrugs her shoulders and begins to turn to walk away.   Mid turn she stops, swings her body back toward me with her mouth hanging open.  "Teacher!!" she squealed with a kind of WTF look on her face.  

Busted.

She obviously caught me in a little bit of a lie.  I couldn't really answer no to that question if it wasn't at least a little bit of bluff.  

She grabbed a friend of hers and told her that I understood Korean.  She then holds up one finger and tells me, in Korean, to count in Korean.  So I begin...

Il, Ee, Sahm, Sa, Oh...

They started jumping up and down and squealing (in Korean) "She speaks Korean!!"   I gave them a smirky little grin and walked away...

... "Whew," I thought, "that was lucky.  I only know how to say 'I do/ don't speak Korean and my numbers!!  Glad she didn't pick up a pencil and say, 'What's this'!!!"  

Things that won't be the same now that my grandma is gone:

Christmases or any gift giving occasion. Lovena had a knack for finding the most utterly pointless, and ridiculously hilarious presents. Ex: Cool Whip spatula, blush applicator with pump (shot makeup at your face!), pregnant barbie doll (just what every 10 year old wants!... glad mom made me keep that one!)Car Dealerships. They loved her. Every year grandma wanted a new car. She always wanted them bigger and faster than the previous one. But not too big. In 2000 she walked into a dealership looking for a new grandma-ish car and walked out with an Oldsmobile Allero, complete with upgraded sports package with rims, spoiler, and sunroof. When I went to see her 3 weeks ago she wanted to trade in her current Toyota Yaris. She thought it made her look fat!!! Seriously, because the car slopes down towards the front, she assumed people would think it was her that was weighing it down! Haha!!Infomercials. Let's face it, we've all been up at 4am and thought, "ya know, I could use a new mop that changes light bulbs and can even julienne fries!" But Lovena never thought it, she always bought it!! And if you were lucky and her purchase came with a "buy now and get the 2nd one free!" ... you were definitely getting it for your birthday! ... and I still use the swivel sweeper! (when I'm in the US)Cardboard boxes. Not only excellent for sending things, moving your stuff or a toy for toddlers... these useful little contraptions were perfect for blocking out sunlight and keeping those pesky neighbors from seeing in!! Just add clothespin and voila!Yardwork. Many hours picking up apples in the backyard and even walking down the street and trimming the neighbors hedges! (in all fairness, they were blocking her view of the intersection!)She had her own quirky way of doing things.... and it's all those little quirks that will sorely be missed.  

I don't get me.

I am not a neat-freak. No doubt about that. I've been home over 2 weeks and have yet to unpack my bags. I've just been digging through an open suitcase tossing items left and right until I find what I'm looking for.

When I get home in the evenings, everything just gets dropped at the door. My shoes, my purse, my pants usually get thrown against some distant wall, I've even forgotten the groceries at the door many times. Or, if I'm in an especially tidy mood, I'll just put the entire bag of groceries in the fridge. Bread, milk, canned goods... whatever. I'll deal with it later.

I just keep kicking things to the side to make a little path for me to walk. Though, now I'm out of room and my crap is impeding the flow of traffic on my path. Translation: I keep tripping over my own crap!

Today was my first day back at my elementary school. No classes to teach just yet. Today we just cleaned our office and classroom. After we were finished sweeping, dusting, etc my co-teachers went back to our office to pretend to be busy. I stayed in the classroom obsessively straightening the desks and chairs. Because, God forbid, things not be in a perfect line or at 90 degree angles!!

And I'm always like that. Everyday, every class. My kids still stare at me with a blank stare every morning when I ask, "How are you today?" But they definitely know what I'm saying when I point to them and say, "push in your chair." After class I walk around making sure all the chairs are pushed in equally. No one chair can be sticking out more than the others.

I never lose my keys. Ever. There is a specific place that they live and they never leave it. I can do nothing before my keys are in their designated spot. But my phone, wallet, purse, hell... even my pants, not telling where they are at any given moment.

I recently lost my pants. My pants!!! How in gods name, when you only have 3 pair to begin with, do you lose a pair of pants in a 600 square foot apartment? I tore the place apart looking for them. Only to find them folded in the closet. What little gnome snuck in and folded my pants?

I routinely find the remote in the fridge, makeup in the microwave, and Anastasia gave me crap about an empty pizza box I was too lazy to take down to the trash so I threw it in the fridge... where it lived for the next 5 months!

So how... how on earth can I be on both extremes of the tidiness spectrum? Being on one I can see, but both?

No wonder I don't bother with dating. Why waste time looking for someone who "gets you" when you yourself don't "get you." I've been living in this little head of mine for 28 years, and the stuff going on up there gets more ridiculous by the day!!!

Well, it's 4:30, time for me to leave school and head home.

Now, where the hell did I put my purse? ...

In America, sex sells.  

In Korea, that's not the case.  Cute sells.  

Every commercial, tv show, and K-pop band is pumped full of doe-eyed, innocent looking, brightly dressed, giggling personalities. 

Case in point:  Girls Generation.   A huge K-pop band here.  

When I arrived here in Korea, their smash-hit "Gee" was playing from every store and restaurant, not to mention every kid's ipod.  The song was unavoidable.... and tranquilizing due to the fact that is song is so damn catchy it almost makes you catatonic. 

However, I was blown away when I saw the video for "Gee".  First, the sheer number of them... there are 9!  Secondly, there isn't an ounce of flesh, or smidge of silicone that can be seen in the video.  

The closest American girl group counterpart that I could come up with is the Pussycat Dolls.  Even the name oozes with sex.  Not to mention they are bursting with enhanced girly bits, their songs are about removing their clothes, and watching a video is basically like being in a strip club in your own living room.

And damn I miss that!

I'm so tired of being killed with cuteness!  Every commercial, every show, every time... cute cute cute!  I'm around 800 little kiddies a week, I get all the cute I can handle then!

I miss the raunchiness of American tv.  I miss things being overtly sexual and downright inappropriate just for the shock value.  I miss sex!!

What's even more annoying is that even men play up to the cute factor here in Korea.  It's nauseating and somewhat disturbing....

...Oh, but I'll save that blog for another day.

Something odd is going on here.

I keep noticing myself doing odd little things.

Like today for instance, at lunch I was eating my soup ( I've already been suckered back into eating Korean lunches) and I looked down and noticed my left hand was participating! Who invited her to the party?!?

I'm using my spoon with my right hand (as usual) but notice my left hand picking up hunks of (unidentified) meat with chopsticks and placing it on my spoon! Wow, when did I learn that trick? Hmmm... congratulations lefty, you are purely decorative no more!

And in the same meal I noticed another freaky phenomenon! I took one bite of my soup and thought it was too bland... so I scooped spoonful after spoonful of hot red pepper paste into my bowl!

WTF? Me and spicy? No way man. Never saw that one coming!

I've also developed a Korean attitude towards elevators. Normally, I would get in, push the floor button and wait for the door to close. Koreans and incredibly impatient. They get in, hit the floor button, and immediately and repeatedly hit the 'door close' button.

I've noticed that now when I get in the elevator I push the "12" button then start jamming my finger on those two little arrows that point towards each other, even though there is only a 2 second difference between pushing it and just waiting for the door to close.

And living out in the sticks has made me lose all my patients for traffic. I was in Daegu last week and was sitting in traffic in a cab for just a few min and wanted to pull my hair out!

How am I going to readjust to being back home??? I'm actually getting nervous about going home. That feels odd. I wasn't neverous to come here but I have serious butterflies about going back.

Hmmm... but it will be nice to drive a car again!

Once again, the first week of July is upon us and my twenties are rapidly approaching their end.

Thus far, my twenties have been spent finding myself.

... and damn it, I've looked everywhere!!!  Where the hell am I already?!?

This year I find myself in Korea... next year.... anyone's guess.  Maybe I'll throw another dart at a globe, seems to be working so far!

Today is my birthday!

I'm not a big birthday person. Never really have been. Generally my birthday comes and goes and I don't alert many people to the occasion.

Today in my 4th grade class a girl was brave enough to approach me before we started.

"Hello, how are you today Bituhne" she said.

"I'm very good, thanks. And you...?"

"I'm happy." she replied.

"Do you know what today is?" I said.

She looked at me with a blank stare and mouth wide open. I knew what she was thinking... "oh crap... we haven't rehearsed this. She's talking to me and I don't know what she's saying..."

"Do you know what today, Seven/ Seven, is?" I said again.

Still just staring at me, she looks even more confused now.

"It's my birthday." I said.

"Bituhne burrsday?!?" she squealed! Partly delighted that she understood me and partly because I would share that information with her. "OOOh, happy burrsday!"

She ran over and whispered to some of her friends. They all perked up and started pointing and whispering.

"Do you like cake?" The little girl said.

"Yes, I like cake"

"Do you like... uuuummm... gifts?" she said.

"Yes, I like cake and gifts."

Then it was time for class to start. Those little girls smiled at me all class like I had shared a special secret with them. It was very cute!

After class, those little girls came into my office, giggling nervously, during the break.

"Bittuuhne.... Happy Burrsday!" and they pulled out a little cake (a gift!) that was made out of clay. It's decorated with clay carrots and kiwi (I think). It actually made my day (thus far anyway!)

Then at lunch (which this week I officially stopped eating in the cafeteria!!) there was a package on my desk! From my grandma, aunts, cousins, parents... Filled with all kinds of fattening treats and goodies! So much for eating right!

There was no way I could eat all those goodies on my own and still fit into my pants, so I decided to take them to my after school class. I loathe my after school class! I teach it on my own and the students run a muck. They own me. It's out of control, they run out of the class, crawl around on the floor. I refuse to beat them or even yell at them and they know this so there is a total disregard for everything I try to do. I dread going to that class... and to make it better, it used to be once a week, now it's twice! Yippie!

They really don't deserve the candy, but I needed to share it with someone. I always offer stuff to my co-teachers and they take it but sometimes they eat it and sometimes they don't. Which makes me giggle because now you know how I feel having gooey rice and bean cakes shoved in my face all the time.

Some of those little girls in my 4th grade class are in my after school class so when I walked in today the whole class of 9 year old monsters broke into the English rendition of "Happy Birthday To You!" Apparently it's one of the only songs they know in English! I was actually touched. One little girl scribbled something in Korean on the board. I had no idea what it said, but judging from the topic of conversation, I pointed to it and said, "Happy Birthday".

All the kids mouths dropped open and they all started squealing. I guessed right! From my limited Korean vocabulary I could understand them saying "oooh, she reads Korean!" They are always amazed and delighted when I say things in Korean.

The kids were up to their normal antics: fighting, cell phone video games, hiding under desks, umbrella jousting, etc. Then I pulled out the chocolate cadbury eggs and the box of Mike and Ike's.

"Do you want candy?" I said pointing to the boxes.

"Yyyyyyeessssss! Give me candy!!!!" they started screaming.

I wrote the time class was over on the board and explained, in more hand gestures than words, that if you listen to me, you get candy when class is over. If not.... NO CANDY! They shut right up! This class exhausts me and it's the last week of after school classes this semester, so I've given up and resorted to only playing hangman. I've started writing phrases on a piece of paper and let them run the game (so at least I feel like on or two students will be doing something constuctive.)

They were as good as gold today! No one spoke out of turn, no one ran away, there was no blood on the floor... nothing! I'm not one for bribes, but next semester.... I'm bribing these monsters with candy every week!!!

Okay, I know it's a little shaky... but you try holding a camera while riding a bike down bumpy Korean roads!

I started and ended at my apartment.  It usually takes about an hour or so... but I did some serious editing!

Goal #2

By the time I leave, I want to be able to wear Korean lingerie.   They have the cutest little frilly lingerie and unfortunately, nothing comes bigger than an A cup.  

I can do it!

Here is my routine..

5:30am- wake up. Hit snooze. Repeat.

6:45am- snooze is now broken... disassemble battery from alarm clock while still asleep.

7:15am- wake up in a panic wondering why my alarm never went off. Turn on water heater.

7:20am- jump into the shower.

7:35am- squeegy the puddles from the floor into the floor drain

7:40am- get ready for school

8:15am- shove a scoop of peanut butter down my throat (try to convince myself that it's actually a decent breakfast)

8:20am- run out the door. Curse at the elevator for taking so long. Power walk to school.

8:33am- Arrive at school. Only 3 minutes late, hell, that's practically on time!

9:00am- Start classes. Repeat the words: Hi, Hello, Hello, Hi, Hi, Hi, Bye, Hello, Hello, Hi, Hello, about a million times. Sing the damn ABC song just as many times.

12:20pm- Lunch. Push rice around my plate with chopsticks. Try to hide octopus and squid in my soup bowl so no one notices I didn't eat anything.

1:20pm- back to class. Repeat the following phrases over and over: No, I don't speak Korean...Yes, I live at Chong Ho too... No, I don't remember my phone number. (because that's what I need... 4th graders texting me all night long.)

2:20pm- After school classes. Try my damnedest to wrangle these kids who would rather be anywhere but here. Give up and play hangman until their hearts content.

3:30pm- Sit at my desk. Stare aimlessly at the clock. Write silly little blogs and check facebook 350 times.

4:30pm- Walk home. Wave to the people leaning out the hospital windows smoking cigarettes. Stop by the little market and pick up a few veggies and something to drink.

4:50pm- Wash my hands repeatedly. Damn germy little vermon! Must not get sick again!!!

5:00pm- Head out to the trails... running, biking, anything to clear my head.

6:30pm- Come home and shower. Forget that I opened the corridor window earlier and now all my neighbors can see me naked. Hmmm... rig up some contraption so I can keep the window open without people seeing in.

7:00pm- Paint, watch tv, think about what to eat for dinner.

8:00pm- Cook dinner. Usually involving chicken, onions, greenpeppers and garlic (those are the veggies my little market sells!)

10:30pm- Get on Skype and talk to my mom and sis... and anyone else that drops by my mom's house!

11:00pm- Watch episode after episode of CSI.... catch Man vs. Wild if I'm super lucky!

2:00am- Curse at myself for being a tv junkie and force myself to go to bed!

Repeat 5x a week...

except on Wednesdays. That involves me taking a bus 30 min outside town and repeating the phrase "No punching, fighting, kicking, hitting...."

Today I was proud of myself.

At lunch, I managed to bone and skin a piece of fish, using chopsticks - with one hand! Even Koreans sometimes use two hands when trying to eat fish (one chopstick in each hand pulling the meat from the bones.) Even more impressive was the perfect little fish skeleton that was left on my tray.

I wish I had brought my camera to lunch.

Last week I had dinner with some Korean teachers from another school and the Head of the Yeongcheon Education Office.

The head guy, Mr. Hwang, looks across the tiny little table we are sitting at and says, "Buck-lew, you have become Koreanized." Mr. Hwang is the only person in Korea who knows my last name, let alone calls me by it.

The reason I have become "Koreanized" to Mr. Hwang is because while loading up my lettuce wrap with barbecued pork, he saw me throw in a few CLOVES of garlic. Koreans eat garlic like it's a vegetable that stands alone, not like it's a spice like the way we westerners use it. I love garlic, the only thing that prevents me from eating more of it at home is that it makes you smell like garlic.

Everyone here smells like garlic... so screw it! Bring on the funk!

Well, it took 4 months.

My 4th grade girls finally discovered my hair today.

I teach after school classes on Mondays and Tuesdays. Today we played "Go Fish". Two weeks ago I taught them animal names. Last week we made animal cards that they drew themselves. This week I taught them how to play "Go Fish". They picked it up immediately, and to my delight, they loved it!

Unfortunately, the classroom we are usually in was locked. So I found a big round table in some random knook and we played there. As each kid finished their hand, they would go around the table and help other students. After a while I started to notice all the girls were behind me. Then I noticed 4 little pairs of hands "accidentally" pulling strands of my hair. Then it became 8 little hands feeling big chunks of my hair, and within moments it was fully on beauty parlor!

haha. The little girls would run their palms over my hair and go, "Ooooohhhohhh" at the texture. I'm not a big fan of being rubbed down by strangers. (It happens to me an awful lot here)... but, people messing with my hair, well that I'm not going to stop!

Though always indirect, I always find Kim Dong Uk's compliments to be genuine and sincere.

KDU: Britne, do you have a date tonight?

BB: What? Um, no. Why?

KDU: Because of the way you look.

BB: Are you saying I look nice today?

KDU: Yes. (then covers his blushing face and walks away)

Another good example of a Kim Dong Uk compliment:

KDU: (Staring at me from across the desk) Your eyes got bigger.

BB: What?

KDU: Your eyes, they are bigger than before.

BB: Are you trying to say that I've lost weight?

KDU: Yes.

I really like this, slightly lost in translation, method of giving someone a compliment. It's not overdone, it's not embellished, it is what it is. They could be misconstrued at backhanded compliments.... but I don't see them that way. I like the brutal honestly of it because at least I know they aren't bullshit.

I want tomatoes to go back into the veggie category!

I know, I know... they are technically a fruit. Yes, they were born a fruit but they identify with vegetables so much better. They are tart, not sugary sweet, and they should never be on top of your ice cream or other desserts, so therefore they are a veggie!

Koreans love tomatoes. They are included in every social gathering. They'll present you with plates of watermelon, apples, pineapple, oranges and cherry tomatoes. Don't get me wrong, I love tomatoes, I put them on everything (sans dessert) but I'm tired of being force fed plateful after plateful of cherry tomatoes!

I hate shopping in Korea.

That's not such a bad thing though.  It has kept me from spending very much money.  

Korea must have a very low unemployment rate... when you are in a store, every rack of clothes has a sales associate waiting for you.  

Even in the US, I'm the kind person who likes to be left alone when I'm shopping.  I appreciate when they ask if I need anything, but once I've said no thanks it drives me nuts when they hover.  So being in a store, where every 5 feet another person is standing over my shoulder as I browse, drives me crazy.  If you look at something longer than just a fleeting glance, they will yank it off the rack and present it to you in a very, The Price is Right, kind of spokesmodel way. 

I hate it.

What's even more annoying is when I do find something I like.  I take my potential purchase to the fitting room lady, and then this is always the next scenario:

Lady looks at me,Lady looks at the dress,Lady looks at me, Lady looks at the dress,Lady looks at me,Lady flips the dress inside out searching for the tags...

Uhhhg.  So frustrating and such a blow to your ego!    I'm always thinking, "I know I'm twice the size of the emaciated little people that usually shop here, but I swear that dress is the right size!"  Luckily, I've yet to be proven wrong.  The clothes always fit and it does make me feel good that I can actually fit into these itty bitty Korean sizes.

But I hate shopping here!

Sometimes when I think back on my life, it plays like a movie in my head, not like my own life.

The places I've been, the people I've met, the things I've done - all chance events haphazardly occurring throughout my life, with no clear rhyme or reason.

It all goes by in the flash on an instant. I desperately try to slow it all down, and to some degree I've been able to. When I travel, I remember more of my life. I can't name 5 things I did in my last 6 months in the US, but I can recall how I've spent every weekend and most weekdays of my time here. My philosophy is: If I remember more of my life, then I've lived more of my life.

But sometimes I get so wrapped up in the now that I forget to savor the insignificant moments. I have to make a conscious effort to step back and let all my senses take over, to absorb everything around me: the good, the bad, the incredible, the uncomfortable, all of them. Even the worst situations eventually become the most vivid scenes in my mental movie.

One of my fondest memories of my time in Mali was the night i was incredibly ill. The heat was sweltering, the humidity thick, sweat was pouring off my face, I was hovering over a nyegen so weak I could hardly stand, while cockroaches crawled all over my feet... At the time, I was in hell.  But I got through it and could even laugh about it the next morning and now, I can't believe how lucky I was just to be there.  I remember every moment, every feeling from that night.

I try to remind myself of that here in Korea.

After work I've been hiking through the mountains of Yeongcheon, trying to release some pent up frustration. Instead of just blazing through the trails as fast as possible, which was my original goal, I've been veering off the path and exploring old tombs that overlook the city, reminding myself to just breathe it all it... Feel the sun, remember how the flowers smell, listen to the sounds of Korea.... it will all be over so fast.

... someday I'll miss all this.

About two weeks ago I went Gumi, Anastasia's town, to have a much needed girls night out!

We started at a little coffee/ ice cream shop/ spa. The spa part of it was called "Dr. Fish". It's just a small tub in the back of the shop with a bunch of fish in it. You sit on the side of the tub and stick your feet in the water and the fish will eat the dead skin off your feet!!

Of course... we all had to try it!! And OH MY GOD did it tickle!!!!! I'm freakishly ticklish anyway, so I could hardly sit there without wiggling and giggling.

After Dr. Fish we went to a local Hookah bar and indulged in wine and cheese, tobacco and girl talk! It was fantastic!!

"W-O-W"... it's fun being out with the girls! I love the cheesiness of Korea! Wait.... that's just me being cheesy in Korea. My mistake! Then around midnight we wandered to a Norebang bar (Karaoke in Japan) and we belted out tunes from the cheesiest pop songs we could think of!

Norebang is not for the faint at heart, or the weak... particularly the tambourining! Especially if you've been drinking heavily. I've had bruises for two weeks! Ouch!

I believe this was Journey's "Open Arms" and the one below was probably something like the Spice Girls. Who knows!

We left Norebang around 3am and went to some local Expat bars. I finally made it back to Anastasia's apartment (wearing shoes I'd never seen before! Don't know who they belonged to) around 5:30 am. I had to be up and at least pretending to be sober by 8am to attend my sister's college graduation... via webcam! Yes, my family sat through the whole ceremony with an open laptop just so I could watch!

It was a great weekend! I can't wait to do it again!

It's one of those things I always assumed I did, but now that they are everywhere I've noticed that I actually do it... I stop, everytime, and smell the roses.

It's one of those little things that's nice to discover about yourself. No matter where I'm going, what I'm doing or how late I am; when I see a pretty rose, I stop and breathe it in.

Goal #1:

Get Healthy.

Mind - Body - and Spirit.

Hmmm, I think all three are easier said than done... but I'm trying.

I really needed today.

Though the frustrations of culture shock are finally weaning, I still end up with a lot of pent up frustration in my day to day life.  However, today was a breath of fresh air.   Literally.

Will and I decided to go hiking today.  He took me to Eunhaesa Temple, on the outskirts of Yeongcheon.  It's a holiday weekend and the parking lots was full when we got there. Will didn't want to look for a parking spot, so in a move that was straight out of the Britne playbook, he drove up to the gate and told the guard he had an appointment with a monk, and in we drove.

We parked next to Eunhaesa Temple.  It's a large and famous temple here in Korea.  We bypassed the temple and started heading up the mountain.  Will wanted to take me to an obscure little temple deep in the mountains.  It's a place he used to go when he was younger.    We hiked the 3.5k up to the temple (whose name I can't remember.)  

It was so nice to be in the mountains.  I'm a mountains girl, always have been.  I'll choose a day lost in the mountains over a day at the beach every time.  Being in the woods was strangely familiar:  the feeling, the smells, the sounds; it was just like being back home.  It was a perfect day today, sunny and warm, but you could feel the damp coolness of the forest as you climbed up.  It smelled like Appalachia with comforting scents of Pine trees and Azalea blossoms.  It was such a calming and peaceful walk up listening to mountain streams and birds chirping.

I was a little worried about not being able to keep up.  I haven't gone hiking in a long time and I'm really out of shape.  But not to worry, Will's a smoker.  I had no problem keeping up with him!

The air seemed clean today.  Maybe it was because I was deep in the mountains.  Maybe it was just a freak day.  Either way, I couldn't get enough.  I sucked in as much air as I could.  I couldn't breathe deep enough.  I just wanted to stand there and breathe all day.  

It was a long, steep hike to the small temple, and I was dripping with sweat by the time we got to the top... and it felt great!  I love the heat.  I love the feeling of being drenched in sweat, I associate that feeling with a lot of good memories... mostly of traveling.  

Will showed me around the temple.  It was a tiny little temple at the top of the mountain.  It was quiet and peaceful it was very.... buddhist.  Will took me to Buddha to pray.  We took off our shoes and entered the main temple building.

I can't decide who is better behaved...

American students or Korean students?

I have to say, on an individual basis, Korean kids are hands down better students. You don't have the problem children with severe or even minor behavior problems. Out of the 800 students I see a week, I have maybe 3 or 4 that are a pain... and they mostly just want attention.

Oh, but when it comes to the group dynamic... holy crap, Korean kids are nuts! The students run a muck! The school is just plain chaotic. It's like trying to teach a herd of cattle! Most of the time you are just trying to keep from getting trampled!

There are always clusters of kids just running down the hallways, unsupervised, and the teachers don't seem to mind. Kids are punching each other, dragging their friends down the halls... it's madness I tell you!

-I could get used to kids bowing at me.  Makes me feel special.  Actually, I am special here.

-There are still a handful of little girls that will come up to me after class just to stare at my eyes.  It's weird and sweet all at the same time.

-I will never master the Korean way of eating.  Chopsticks I can do, but using a spoon for my soup in my right hand while twirling wet noodles with chopsticks in my left.... no.  I don't have that kind of coordination.  My left hand is merely decorative.  

-When I'm feeling a little rebellious, I walk around my apartment with shoes on!

-I've lived here 2 months now.  I still haven't taken the trash out.  At least not all of it.  It's complicated here.  There are 30,000 ways to separate your trash and I've yet to figure all of them out!

-If son saeng nim (teacher) likes you, she'll cheat so you can win at bingo... But shhhhh, don't tell!

-Every time I travel I make a mental list of children I would someday like to adopt.  

As far as babies go, there are none in the entire world cuter than African baby boys.  With their shiny bald heads and their infectious chubby cheeked grins.  

But when it comes to toddlers, hands down Asian (Korean specifically) little girls.  Their round porcelain faces and their jet black little pigtails that bop around as they play are mesmerizing.  There is a sweetness to the little girls here, and the older ones and hell adults too, that is unparalleled. 

I've come close to asking women if I can have their kids.  I see them giggling and playing around town or in my elevator and I just want to keep them.  Though, It's probably considered rude to ask to take someone's child... okay, it's probably more creepy and freakish than rude, but you have no idea how cute these kids are!  Thank goodness Korea doesn't allow singles to adopt, because if they did, I would, without a doubt, spend the money I'm saving this year on bringing one back to the US.  

This is my new BFF in Y'cheon.  She wandered up to me at a festival and held out her hand and said, "Hi."  My students won't even do that and this little girl was about 2 years old!  We "talked" for a few minutes... mostly repeating the word "hi"... then when I got my camera out she immediately stopped and struck a pose!  (I think she was trying to give the, ever popular in Korea, peace sign... but got confused and gave me the "L.... loser" sign)

After I took the picture she walked up to me and gestured at my camera.  I turned it back on and showed her the picture, she nodded at it in approval and then skipped away.  Her mom and I laughing the whole time.   How cute is she!?

I had to discipline my first student today.   Well, sort of.  

I do find the whole situation sort of hypocritical and amusing.  I was a pain in the ass as a student and a child for that matter.  Disobeying, being obnoxious, and talking back were sort of my forte as a kid.  I was even paddled by my second grade teacher and it's actually a fond memory of mine from elementary school.   So to be in the position of disciplinarian feels slightly ironic to me...

In the last, and worst, class of my middle school day, a student refused to do any work, no matter how hard I tried to get him to participate. This happens with several students so after doing my best I finally went to help another student who was calling for me. Later I noticed that the student who refused to participate was being loud and showing his paper to the students around him. I looked at his worksheet and there was a very obvious phallic drawing. He didn't even try to hide it. I took the paper away from him and he kept giving me a hard time.

My middle school co-teachers no longer come to class with me. They just let me fly solo and teach class on my own. I prefer this and honestly, I think the kids are easier to deal with because they have to pay attention when there is no one to translate for them. The only drawback is, since I am alone, I have to maintain constant control. A lot of the time my classes teeter on the brink of chaos so I have to do my damnedest to maintain control. If these kids ever realize how easy it is to take control over me, I'm screwed!

So, even though what this kid did, I hardly consider bad, I couldn't just let him slide. I told him to stand up. Then I pointed to the back of class and told him to go. He said, and shook his head, "no". We went back and forth a few times, my expression and voice getting louder with each subsequent time. I wanted to just let it go. Other kids were calling for me and I could have easily walked away again but that would have put me in a very vulnerable place and I'd never get this kid to do what I said ever again. So I kept on him.

Finally, I took him by the arm, without being aggressive, just assertive, to guide him to the back of class. He jerked his arm away. I tried again with the same result only now he turned his back to me. In my mind I was thinking "GGGrrrr you little ass! You are not going to win this game! You have no idea how stubborn I am and now you're going down!"

I put my hands on his shoulders and turned him towards the back and marched him to the back of class. There is a small little alcove that is about 4" off the ground. I tried to make him stand in the alcove but he absolutely wouldn't budge. I figured this was a losing battle so as long as he stands in the back, that's good enough. I went back to helping the other students.

A few minutes later I noticed him messing with the computers in the back of the room. I walked over to him with a scowl on my face, one hand on my hip and the other pointing to the alcove.  I stomped my foot while I pointed. He refused. I asked him if I should get Humphrey (my co-teacher). He just looked away. I took his arm again. He pulled it away.  I tried again. Still no luck. At this point a few students in the back of the room were trying to coax him to just get into the alcove.  I tried to lead him by the arm again and this time he shoved my arm towards me pushing me with it. Ah crap.   Now he's in for it.

I walked to one of the students who was trying to convince him to listen to me. I told the student, "go to the teacher's room. Get Humphrey." He looked at me with a puzzled expression at first, not understanding what I was saying, then his eyes got big.  All their eyes got big.  The obnoxious  student got into the alcove.  I was tempted to just let it go, but now that other students saw what was going on, I had to follow through.  

Humphrey is my co-teacher.  Every day, multiple times a day, he comes to me and says, "If you have problems with students, come get me.  Any problems, get me."  I've seen him in the hallways disciplining students.  Actually, he's the only person I've ever seen disciplining them.  

Humphrey came into class and escorted the student out.   And that was that.  Class continued as normal... except more quietly.  After class I went to my office and the unruly student was on his hands and knees in the middle of the office.  (it's a common punishment here.  I'm not really sure why.)  I went to my desk and the other teachers hovered over the student and shoved him towards my desk while whispering in his ear.   

Tears began streaming out of his eyes and the boy, who only comes up to my chin and is about 12 years old, muttered in broken English, "Bbbbiiiitnne, I sorry."   I felt horrible.   I'm sure the kid was whipped when taken from class, and I'm sure he was going to get it at home as well.  Another teacher was wiping the tears from his cheeks as he recited his apology. 

Though, I'm pretty sure the tears were due to embarrassment, not punishment, but either way... I doubt I'll have trouble with him again.   At least, I hope not.

A picture I snuck of Humphrey with a different 

student during my first week.

ureI dread when people offer me food. They think they are being so nice, and actually they are, sharing their food with me.

Unfortunately... most of their food repulses me. I don't want it. I don't even want to look at it. I really don't want to be where I can even smell it and I certainly don't want my taste buds anywhere near it!

Then everyone I walk by at work has to be so generous and insist I have a piece of octopus, or neon green sticky rice ball, or god knows what else.

***Case in point, just as I'm sitting here typing this, my coworker walks up and hands me a little glass bottle. He hands it to me and says, "This is a Korean drink. It tastes a little terrible but it's good for health." He was right (at least on one point) It was terrible. Tastes a little like drinking Worcestershire sauce. ***

The "good for health" thing is starting to annoy me. It's sort of a Korean cop out. Any Korean custom that is unpleasant is immediately explained as being "good for health". I'm calling BS on most of them. I'm sure some have to be good for you. But, for example, sleeping on the floor is said to be good for women's health. How?

Koreans traditionally sleep on the floor but it's not uncommon for them to have beds. However, they make the mattresses reminiscent of sleeping on the floor.... so hard as a rock. This is not good for my health. Soft bed, hard bed... I don't see how any one is more or less good for you if it's not your preference. Personally sleeping on, what feels like, an ironing board makes it difficult for me to sleep. I wake up constantly. So essentially, for a month now, I haven't slept. That is NOT good for my health!! I'm exhausted! My coworkers tell me I look tired all the time. It's because, damnit, I AM!!!

Oh, but that's neither here nor there. This is supposed to be a food based bitch session.

Korean food can have it's pleasant moments. I've been to some good traditional restaurants. But most of the food I'm eating is public school cafeteria food. The first few weeks I had no problem and actually looked forward to lunch. I liked trying everything. But then just as I hit the one month mark something dawned on me... I'm not trying stuff anymore, now I just have to eat this stuff for my meals... everyday.

I'm not a big seafood fan. For two reasons... taste and texture. So choking down octopus tentacles (suction cups and all) and fire hot squid everyday sorta takes the joy out of lunch. Not to mention I'm trying to maneuver these tasty treats into my mouth with stainless steel chopsticks all while wearing a white collared shirt! Tricky!

Though, I have been complimented many times on my master chopstick abilities! (Thanks Mrs. Spence!) Some of my coworkers get teased that I work the chopsticks better than they do. Though I think the lack of chopstick skills is a western stereotype here in Korea... they are shocked that any foreigner can use them. I don't see why it's so shocking. There is at least one Chinese food place in every strip mall in America, how is there anyone left that doesn't know how to use them?

But I just don't get Korean food in this century. I get why it is this way from a historical standpoint. Until about 50 years ago (post Korean war) Korea was in the 3rd world. You ate what you had. So okay, I get why you started to ferment cabbage in vinegar and slathering it in hot pepper paste... because you had to. I get why you ate so many anchovies and pickled eggs and octopus and what have you. But now Korea has a huge global economy. They are far technologically superior to the US. Koreans are into gadgets and high fashion. Money is abundant. So why the hell can't you update the menu? Just a little.

Though my bitching is in vain. Their are plenty of pizza and fried chicken joints in SoKo. They are everywhere. So I guess I can suck it up and choke down a traditional lunch and grease it up for dinner.... though that brings me to another thought. If you want to make a fortune, start pushing diet pills/ exercise gimmicks in SoKo. South Koreans are obsessed with their weight. Korean women are starting to suffer the same rates of eating disorders as the US. But after my first week of school I wondered why, in a country where I have yet to see a fat adult, are there so many chubby little kids?

It's because I am witnessing the first generation of Korean kids brought up on junk food. They love pizza and corn dogs and spaghetti and potato chips. So for you entrepreneurs out there.... give it 10-15 years when these chubby kids are chubby adults and sell them ab lounges. You will make a fortune!

I myself need to start looking into an ab lounge or something. I keep wanting to go run but it's either too damn frigid outside or there is such a thick layer of shit in the air that I feel it will do me more damage than good to run in it. I was losing a little bit of weight until the "Great chicken debacle" of March '09.

Ah, what is that you say? That was the first day I caved in and went to get greasy food. I went to one of the many fried chicken places. I walked in and pointed to the chicken and held up two fingers. The man behind the counter nodded. The pieces looked pretty small so I shook my head "no" and then held up 3 fingers. Again, he nodded. I pointed to the calculator on the counter and he typed in a price. 2500W (or about $2.50) I thought that was inexpensive but about right. Food is cheap here. A few minutes later he gestures to me that it's ready. He hands me 3 BOXES of chicken. Each with 6 or 7 pieces in it. Crap!!! Then I realize he left out a zero on the calculator. He meant 25000W ($25) Crap Crap Crap!!! Now I not only am going to bust out of my pants, but I busted my budget too! Oh well. That was weeks ago... I still have chicken in the freezer that I'm trying to get through.

That's one lesson learned. Chicken is sold by the box, not by the piece. Got it!

(The image above is from my first dinner with coworkers. Young-jin prefers to draw pictures when she can't think of a translation (which I appreciate) I believe this image is the international symbol for squid!)

Beware: Random stream-of-consciousness blogging ahead. Though, I guess all blogging is that way.

I've been in Korea about 10 days now; 7 of which were all but sequestered at a university with 500 other new teachers. During this orientation they pretty much beat the phrase "Korea is dynamic" into our brains. What is meant by Korea is dynamic is, "Korea can be a pain in the ass, it's unpredictable and everything happens at the last minute, so learn to adapt."

So far, this is true. In 36 hours I start teaching. What grades? How many students? (my estimate is between 800-1000 kids) Where is my other school? What days do I go there? How do I get there? None of these have been answered and I doubt they will be until the moment they occur.

I'm currently living in a Korean motel.

I was told they would have an apartment for me when I got to my town. The first thing they told me when I showed up was, "we didn't get you a house yet." Ah, so dynamic. They told me I was going to stay with a 25 year old female teacher for a few days, but she didn't want me to stay with her, so I ended up in this hotel instead. Which is fine by me. Though, Anne (the teacher's English name) is actually really nice and was just too shy to have me stay with her.

I am determined to learn my co-teachers/ friends real names and not their English names, Will (Dong-Uk) and Anne (Young-Jin).

When we got to Yeongcheon (sounds like Young-chawn) we were all greeted by our main co-teacher holding up a sign with our name on it. Our co-teacher is our go-to person for the rest of the year, from setting up utilities, rides to the grocery store, and contract disputes, whatever. I was expecting a young female teacher. I saw my name being help up by a young, male, and very cute Korean guy dressed to the nines. With him was a very serious looking middle aged woman also wearing her professional attire. She is my vice principal. Will, my co-teacher, speaks English well and introduced me to the VP. She didn't utter a word to me for the next hour or so during a welcome ceremony.

On the way to Will's car after the ceremony the VP pulled out her phone and called someone. Will nudges me and says she's talking to the principal. Teasing, I said, "oh, is she telling him she wants to trade me for a different teacher?" He replied, "oh no, she Looooovvvesss you!" which I totally wasn't expecting. Then Will and I got into his car (the VP had her own) and as I was about to shut the door, the VP leans into the car, right over me and goes, "He's really really handsome isn't he!?!"

Great, the VP is trying to play matchmaker!

Though, It's not like I had to be told he was good looking! Will, Anne, and I went out to dinner at a posh restaurant and I sat across from both of them. They kept whispering and Anne would giggle. I asked why they were staring at me and Will said matter-of-factly, "You have blue eyes." Anne giggled while covering her mouth. I guess neither of them had ever stared directly into blue eyes before.

They both stared at me through dinner. I can handle that. I got used to that in Africa. I don't take offense to it. After dinner it was harder to ignore because I had nothing to distract myself with. Anne stares at me indirectly where Will makes no attempt to disguise the fact that his gaze if fixated directly on my face. It is intense. Imagine the person sitting 3 feet away from you just staring directly into your eyes during an entire meal!

Bored with the awkward silence after dinner, I said, "you're still staring at me." Will just grinned and said, "You look like a Barbie Doll."

The three of us, and another woman, had lunch at a traditional Korean restaurant for lunch today. Again, I sat across from Anne and Will. Will being directly across from me, spent the entire time staring so intensely at me that it felt like he was drilling a hole into my head. From now on, I'm sitting next to Will at meals not across from him.

Traditional Korean restaurants are going to take time getting used to. The food was delicious but the facilities are a little tricky for the average American. You sit on the ground, legs crossed, at a table that is only a few inches above the floor. That isn't a problem. The problem arises when it's time to leave and you can't figure out how to walk with two numb legs!! The best case scenario is that you end up with a pimp walk and have to sort of limp and drag one leg on your way out! But I guess if they are staring at you regardless, why not look like an idiot on top of that!

Koreans make fun of my height.

Damnit, Damnit, Damnit, Damnit!!!! I can't win. Anywhere. That's it... next time, I'm moving to a Pygmy village.

We went to my future apartment yesterday to check it out. It was in need of some TLC but overall not bad. It's about 4 times larger than what I expected so I can't complain. There was no furniture in it and they asked if I wanted a bed. (They asked because Koreans typically sleep on the floor) I said that I would prefer a bed. My principal asked how tall I was because he needed to order it (apparently they come in sizes) and I told Will and he translated. Then they all laughed. Crap.

My principal is a Korean version of my grandpa.

When I met my principal I immediately was reminded of my Pap. My principal speaks basically no English. I sit is his palatial office with Will and he gives me juice and talks at me for a half hour or so while Will just nods his head. Based solely on vibes, he seemed like an iron-fisted authority figure with a soft side. And again, this is based on nothing but gibberish and a feeling. At one point today I was sitting around with Will waiting to go somewhere when the principal left the room. Will leans in and says, "my boss is very strict. But he is also a very kind man." He hit the nail on the head and confirmed my vibe.

Though, all I ever really knew of my Pap was the soft side, I heard stories from his time as a principal. I imagine my Pap was like this principal of mine. Someone all the teachers respect but there is the ever-present undercurrent of fear.

Pizza party at my place!

The day we got to our new homes my friends and I decided it was time we plan a reunion! Somehow, my 3 friends and I all ended up within an hour of each other. I'm in the middle. So we have decided to meet up at my apartment this weekend (hopefully I'll have one by then even though I'm supposed to move in tomorrow.)

Already, I spend an hour on the phone with them every night laughing about stupid stuff that keeps happening. I have no idea how to tell them where I live or how they can get here, but we'll deal with that hurdle when we need to.

So far I have been able to identify 3 western stores in my city. An Office Depot, a 7-11 and a Dominos Pizza. The latter being very close to my apartment. Though, just because the logo looks the same, doesn't mean the product is the same. Koreans prefer potatoes, corn, and squid as pizza toppings. Bleh. But regardless, they are all coming in for a pizza party/ sleepover this weekend.

Maybe we'll just order a cheese pizza! If they even have cheese!

For months now I've been trying to figure out where my life should go from here.  I made that pretty obvious when I wasn't actually in Charlotte last summer, but had hopped a flight to Dubai without telling anyone.

Dubai confirmed to me that I needed a change, a big one.  No matter where I was in the US, I never really felt like myself, but the moment I stepped off the plane in Dubai and felt the salty Arabian air hit my face, it all melted away.  I was me again.

When I got back I started looking into Architecture jobs all over the world:  London, Copenhagen, Sydney, Dubai (obviously)... but I wasn't really excited about the prospect of "same shit different country" ... So I decided to take a blind leap and go for change... BIG change.

The current economic crisis gives me the perfect excuse to deviate from my norm.  Unlike last time, I don't have to leave a "good job" to pursue my new idea, since I have no job in the first place!

So, without further ado....  I'm moving to KOREA.  (yes, South.  I'm not completely crazy and I really don't think Kim Jong Il would let me in his country anyway!)  I'll be teaching English to cute little Korean kids.

And I'm moving soon.  About 3 weeks to be exact.  The embassy called me Wednesday and by Thursday they had Fed-exd my contract to me.  I've been accepted into a program through the Korean government to teach in public schools.   I'm not sure of the specific village/town/city yet but I do know the Province  "Gyeongsangbuk-do"   It's pretty big province so I could be anywhere on the the East Coast to center of So.Ko.  (towards the Japan side).  It's all kind of relative though, Korea is only the size of Tennessee.

Needless to say, my family is kinda irked.  But they aren't exactly shocked either.   I have to be in Seoul by Feb. 19th.  It's a 24 hour flight so I might be leaving on the 18th or 17th.   I have a week or so of orientation then I'll be sent to my village/town/city. 

I'm kind of freaking out.  Which is an odd feeling for me, since I usually have no problem jumping into things head first.  I think my jaded heart is scared because of what happened last time.   I've never fully recovered from the heartbreak of coming back from Mali, I'm just terrified of what will happen to my heart if it happens again... but I have to stop thinking of that.  That will just drive me nuts.  It's time I shake it off and just go with an open heart and open mind and hope for the best.  

I'm sorry for breaking the news to most of you this way.  I've been really guarded with this secret.  I didn't want to say much until I was certain I would go... I'm certain now.  Unfortunately, I didn't realize I'd be leaving so soon.  And again, I'm trying to avoid a big scene like last time.  I want to just pack my bad and be gone.  I won't do that, but it's tempting.

This was the picture on the front page of my local newspaper this morning. This little guy (who was 12.5' long, 500 lbs and roughly 85 years old) was run over and killed by a car while trying to cross the road. Doesn't he know only chickens are supposed to do that?

That sucks for the gator, but I feel bad for the driver who hit him. I'm sure the car has a good bit of damage, but can you imagine how freaked out you'd be? My heart starts pumping 1,000,000 beats a minute every time I run over plastic bag that looks like it could be an animal. And you know anytime you hit something big; cat, dog, deer, whatever... your first instinct is to get out and see if it's okay. The person who hit this thing probably didn't see it either, so I'm guessing they didn't know what it was. If I ran over something that big I'd think I had hit a person (or a few people.) Can you see someone getting out of their car and running to see if someone was okay, then realizing what it really was!? "Are you Ooo-Oh Shit!!! Oh Shit! Get back in the car!!!" At that point you'd hope it was dead, otherwise you'd have one pissed off gigantic alligator on your ass!

The scary part is, this is not the only huge gator in the area. There are lots of them around here! About a year or so ago my dad was down close to our beach house in Sneads Ferry, NC (only about 30 min from here) where he was helping a friend put his boat in the water. He walked across the street to a little fresh water pond and noticed something out of the corner of his eye. It was a huge alligator sunbathing on the shore just a few feet from where he was standing. And like any sane person, my dad became infatuated with the gator and would show up at the pond and try to coax it out of the water so he could show it off to whoever he brought with him. He soon discovered that the alligator was not alone. It had 3 friends. These were no small alligators either. When I went with my dad (yes I was suckered in to going to gawk at the big reptiles too) we managed to make enough of a ruckus to attract the gators attention and the gator swam over to where we were standing. He got to about 20 feet away from me when I decided that he was close enough and it was time to get back in the car. In all honesty, we were probably so close that we were past the point of no return... If that gator had wanted to eat me, there is no way I could have gotten out of the way. I would have been a delicious snack.

It was just about the same moment, when I decided to go back to the car, that our little gator friend decided to play hide-n-seek. All of a sudden, he just disappeared under the brown murky water. That was it, I was out of there, but slowly... Very slowly. From inside the car I could see that two more alligators were swimming over to where my dad was standing. That was fine, but it was very nerve-racking to know that there was one gator hidden under the water, just by the shore, and another that could be anywhere. My dad decided he didn't want to be a reptile snack either and he joined me in the car. Luckily, we probably weren't in all that much danger because those alligators were probably pretty full. How do I know? Because as soon as we got in the car a local (shirtless) redneck rolled up in a beat-up golf cart with a beer in the cup holder, a raw chicken in one hand and a baby sitting on his lap. For a more accurate visual, picture Britney Spears with no money mixed with the Croc. Hunter (RIP) and that's about what this guy was. Pimping around with a baby in his lap and then dangling it out around alligators. Thank god he didn't chuck the wrong thing into the pond!! Mr. R Neck told us that he fed the gators on a pretty regular basis. I still can't decide if that's a good thing or bad. On the one hand, if they aren't hungry, they might not eat you. On the other hand, the better fed they are the bigger they are, and these were at least 8 feet.

I find it ironic that people keep asking me what kinds of crazy animals I saw when I was in Africa. I saw a few lizards and a praying mantis and that's it. If you want to see some real animals, go to Sneads Ferry! At the beginning of this summer my dad tried to open the front door of the beach house and just as he was reaching for the door knob, he noticed a copperhead wrapped around it. This summer I almost hit a bobcat with my car less than a block from the beach house. So, within a few blocks of nka bengebow ka kokojiso (my parents beach house... Hey, a tiny bit of bambara still remains) you can be killed by a shark, alligator, copperhead, bobcat and a bunch of other scary animals we haven't had to deal with yet!

...And on an all together different note, I am officially finished taking all malaria medications!! Yay!!! Hopefully now the insomnia, crying spells, and slight depression will start to fade away as the mefloquine and primaquine fade out of my blood steam.

...And on an even better note, I got a new job yesterday! Yay!! In just a few weeks I'll be moving to Charlotte and getting back to my regular life in a new architecture firm. I think Charlotte and I will be a good fit. In the past two years, I have lived (some more briefly than others) in the following places: Raleigh, New York, Alexandria (DC), Mali, Jacksonville, and now Charlotte. Ya know, I think I'm ready to stop trying on new cities, countries, and continents and just stick with one.... And it looks like the Queen's City it is! This isn't exactly what I had planned for my life right now, but what fun is a plan anyway? I just go where my heart tells me and my feet take me and hope everything turns out okay, and so far it has... Thank God!

Well, the Peace Corps didn't last quite as long as I had planned and now I have...No apartmentNo jobNo carNo planWhen I was in Philly at the Peace Corps staging event before leaving for Mali, I saw this quote from Georgia O'Keefe written somewhere:"I've been absolutely terrified every moment of my life -- and I've never let it keep me from doing a single thing I wanted to do."That's as true now as ever. As disappointed as I am for not staying in Mali, I'm still proud that I went at all. I did the best I could with the circumstances I was given and that's all I could do. And honestly, the hardest part of the whole experience (as short as it was) was leaving. Never have I ever (haha... good times) felt so awful in my entire life! I did a lot of crying the day I decided to leave, and not because I wanted to go home, it was because I felt like I was disappointing everyone; myself, the Peace Corps, my new friends, and the entire village. I can't even describe the gut-wrenching emotion involved when you have to stand face to face with the members of a village and basically say, "I'm not going to help you, I'm going home now." Especially after how nice they had been and all they had to do to get you there. And it's not like you can just sneak away in the night, okay, you probably can but that's not what I did, even though the thought crossed my mind, I decided if I was going to leave I was going to have the balls to not just disappear. Once that was all over with, I had to sit with the country director and tell her that I wasn't going to stay. That might not sound so difficult but, if you've ever met Kateri, Mali's director, you'd know how hard that is. Especially, when she's actually being sympathetic and says that out of all the people, she never expected you to ET (early terminate). Luckily, by the time I got to talk to Kateri, I was all out of tears, mostly due to dehydration but tear-free none the less.Being back at home hasn't exactly been easy either. The first night I was back I was ecstatic. Then I woke up the next morning, not to the sounds of a rooster or donkey, and realized that the experience I had waited so long to have was already over. I don't know about anyone else but I have to prepare myself for things. When I move out of an apartment, I walk around and take one last look at everything. When I leave a job, I take pictures of my desk and save funny emails that I received. When I know there is only one more fudgecicle left, I lick every last drop of chocolate off the stick to savor the flavor. I didn't get to do that with Mali. I assumed I was going to be there a long time so I never even took my camera to my homestay village. I don't have very many pictures at all. I don't know how to contact some of the friends I made there. Some of the people that I really cared for, I never even learned their last names. I just assumed there would be plenty of time for that. Oh, how I was wrong.Now I find myself breaking down and crying at bizarre times, like on the treadmill. I decided since I didn't really go into the Peace Corps, I was actually just at Fat Camp (yay for losing 10 pounds!!) I might as well try to keep it going by getting on the treadmill every now and then. Then, I can't seem to figure out if the wetness on my face is sweat or tears. I think it's both. At least the physical release of crying makes the working out easier and makes me run faster, so maybe that's a good thing. Although, I'm hoping the sudden outbursts are just side effects of the Mefloquine (the anti-malaria drugs I still have to take for 2 more weeks) I'm hoping that once the crazy pills are out of my system I'll get out of this funk and start feeling like myself again. I've felt like I've been in a fog for quite a while now. Here is a little snipit of the side effects of this literal crazy pill..."...neuropsychiatric disorders have been reported such as: sensory and motor neuropathies (including paresthesia, tremor and ataxia), convulsions, agitation or restlessness, anxiety, depression, mood changes, panic attacks, forgetfulness, confusion, hallucinations, aggression, psychotic or paranoid reactions and encephalopathy. Rare cases of suicidal ideation and suicide have been reported." I'm hoping it's just the meds and not just me. Hopefully this funk of mine will pass soon. I can't take feeling this way for too much longer. Unfortunately, tomorrow I have to start taking another anti-malarial drug for the next two weeks. So, for the next 14 or so days, I'm going to be a nut-job!!! Great. Oh well. One day at a time, I guess. At least tomorrow I'm also sending out some resumes so that gives me something to look forward to. We'll see how that goes...