So, I ended up buying a last minute flight home and arrived in the U.S. on the evening of Jan. 4. I went straight to the emergency room and have basically been in the hospital since. They have been testing me for all sorts of things but still don't know whats wrong with me. Really, they are just giving me tons of antibiotics and trying to kill whatever is there while also waiting for the test results. I almost went to the hospital in Thailand, but after everything that I have been through I am happy to be home. I will finally go home this evening. It'll take a couple weeks before I totally feel better again and after that I will be moving to Long Beach and looking for a job. Its strange, but I'm actually looking forward to having a job. Not the job search, but to working. I've been avoiding it for a long time now and have really loved the path that I have created for myself, but it is time for me to take a new and totally unfamiliar step. For me, that means to get a "real job". One with benefits and that pays more than a students salary. It's time...

I haven't posted in a while, and I've made some big changes.

1. I took a trip by myself to Pokhara, Nepal and stopped by this beautiful lake called Begnas Lake. The place was completely empty while I was there and the himalayas could be seen just over the mountains.

2. After a lot of thought, I decided to leave my volunteer program early and am no longer in Nepal. I have all sorts of justifications for this decision, but the most important one is that it just wasn't working out for me. It wasn't an easy decision, but I don't regret it at all.

3.I am now in Goa, India where it is warm and beautiful. The part of goa that I am is relaxing and not filled with all the crazy parties that Goa is so infamous for.

4. Unfortunately, I have been extremely sick for about 5 days now. I went to the doctor and he gave me a bunch of medicine, which seem to be working temporarily.

5. It's New Years Eve and there's now way I'll be able to celebrate with the way I've been feeling. But I am quite satisfied with the past year and look forward to the year to come.

6. I have to leave India by Jan 12. I'm either headed to the U.S. or to Thailand. I haven't quite decided yet.

hopefully more in-depth posts to come. Happy New Year!

The history of Thanksgiving that we learn as children is so friendly. As we grow older we learn the skewed reality of the "thanksgiving story", but one thing remains the same. We take the time of Thanksgiving to cook giant meals and get together with friends and family. We sit at the dinner table and everyone says something they are thankful for. Usually people are thankful for their friends, family, and the food on their table. This is my third Thanksgiving outside of the U.S. Even when I am in the U.S., I spend thanksgiving with my friends and family, but there is also a lot of family and friends that are very far away. I have fading memories of spending thanksgiving as a child at my Aunts house or with other family friends. But for many years now, my family of 3 has spent all our thanksgivings with my "second family". When I was very young, this family invited me and my family to become a part of their family and over the years they have become really like family for me. For thanksgiving, each person will make something and bring it over to their house and everyone will join together to share and amazing meal. I am here in Nepal, where the poverty is blatant and the opportunities that people have are limited. Most people in this country will never eat a meal like the one on the thanksgiving table. The other Americans I am with and I will put together the best Thanksgiving meal we can and we will show the Israelis what its like to have a Thanksgiving meal. We will go around the table and have everyone say what they are thankful for. What am I thankful for?

Everything. I am thankful for my friends, my family, my education, my freedom, my knowledge, my mind, my physical ability, the physical and mental ability of those around me, and I am thankful for my open mind. I am thankful to be in a place like Nepal, where I can learn a new culture, a new way of life, and expand my mind and knowledge.

Happy Thanksgiving. This is the only time of year I get a little homesick while I'm away.

I feel like I have gotten only small tastes of the Himalayas so far. From India to Nepal, I have tempted myself with the foothills, but have not gotten close enough to see the enormousness of this famous mountain range. In India, I went to the Everest Museum and saw an amazing diagram of the Himalayas. I find myself becoming more and more fascinated and more and more drawn to them. Before coming to Nepal, my one goal was to do the "tea-house trekking" lower part of the mountain range. Upon arrival to Nepal, my goal was to see Mt. Everest; to find the best view of the mountain that I could. Now that I've been in Nepal for about a month and a half, I can feel my goals changing. I feel this drive to do the Mt. Everest basecamp trek. It is a 14 day trek both ways, which takes you to the basecamp of Everest. The place where the hardcore trekkers who attempt Everest begin. My program ends in February, so it will be very cold. However, it is one of the most popular times of year to trek in Nepal because the visibility is better. I think I want to do it. I dream of it. I'm sure if I will do it. I leave my plans always open to change, but at the moment I really want to do this trek. If I decide to do it, it'll cut my trip shorter because can be pretty pricey. I have time to think about it. But I love having these types of options. It's amazing!!!!

I waited with 2 other volunteers to catch our bus to Kathmandu. We stood by the side of the rode waving our hands at buses, which ultimately flew by us full with people. As bus after bus passed us, I started waving at some of the truck drivers head for the capital, hoping to find a ride. Eventually, a bus stopped and us and the Nepalis waiting for a bus rushed toward the doors. The driver didn't take anyone inside, and we headed to the back to climb to the top, just to watch it pull away from us. Eventually another bus stopped for us. The Nepalis pushed their way on and the 3 of us foreigners were instructed to climb up top. We were a little excited for this, our first chance to ride the top of the bus. It's an experience that we all wanted before leaving Nepal. We climbed up the ladder and made ourselves "comfortable", sitting on people's bags. We made sure our bags were relatively secure and found places to hold on as the bus took off. Now, if I were a bus driver with human beings riding the top of my bus as I drive the windy and bumpy roads of Nepal, I think I would manage my speed a little to make sure nobody got hurt. This is not the philosophy of a Nepali bus driver who has been putting people on the top of his bus since he first started driving. As we rounded each turn, we shifted our weight and grabbed various parts of bags and the small railings to feel more secure. The reality is that we were fine, but this was not an experience we were used to. As we worried for our lives and I pictured us tumbling off and down the mountain, we tried to use Beyonce as a way to destract us. It worked. The truth is, it was really fun. If it were slightly safer, we had the best seats on the bus. We watched as the bus pulled away from the magnificant views of Nepal and starred in awe at the top of the Himalayas. The cool breeze against our skin, sun on our faces, and really feeling a part of the scenery. It was also funny to see people's reactions of seeing 3 foreigners riding the top of the bus. It is common to see people packed on the top of the bus around Nepal and India, but it is never only 3 foreigners. People waved as we passed by, trucks honked, men and women on motorcycles smiled and waved and lowered their bandanas from their mouths to say "hello" before putting it back to protect them from the pollution. There was even a few guys riding the top of the truck who were joking about how tight we were holding on. At one point the money collector for the bus swung his body onto he roof as we were holding on for our lives. He was so comfortable moving along the outside of this bus while it traveled down the windy roads. As we approached the checkpoint to enter Kathmandu, we were instructed off the rooftop and into the bus filled with Nepalis, and we headed to our stopping point.

When I first arrived with my 6 roommates to Mahadav Besi, we arrived to our mud house and were overwhelmed with the amount of work it needed. Our task of the first few days in the village was simply to make our home liveable. The house sits in a beautiful location with views of mountains/hills from all angles. Their are fields everywhere and it is on "the road" in this small part of the village. We have neighbors attached to our house and the next nearest house is where the Nepali staff of my program live. Other than that, there is a "Rye Village" about 10 minutes away, another "Rye Village" past that, and those living in the stone quarry down by the river. There is one school at the top of a hill where many of the "Rye" children go to school and farms everywhere. It is absolutely beautiful. It felt like cleaning out someone else's garage as we pulled everything out of the house and layed it out front. We cleaned and went through everything, deciding what to throw, what to keep, and how to make this place a home. The structure is made of wood covered by mud. After all the clean-up, here is what it is like. From the road, you walk down a path, which is more like a "walking trail", lined to the right by sugar cane and to the left by fields waiting to be churned and replanted. Now, we had begun our garden, which is along this path. We are also building a small fishpond in this area. In front of the house is a porch and open area, which is shared with our neighbor 'hajur buwaa', an old man who is slunched with missing teeth and an cathedar, but still tends the sugar cane fields and works with the grains. What a tough old man. On the front of the porch is a hammock, built by one of my roommates who I swear can build ANYTHING and really has the innovation and energy to do them all (hence the fishpond). Approaching the front door, on the left is another door that leads to one of the rooms. You duck your head through the front door (the whole place is built for people no taller than I) and to the right is the "living room" and kitchen. It is basically a mud room with a table, a couple blankets and pillows to sit on, a 2 burner stove, and a fireplace made of mud (which we don't use due to poor ventilation techniques). A little forward, and you run into the wall, but to the left is the ladder. Going up the ladder to the second floor, you are exposed to a bigger room, filled with 3 beds. There is an attic area above there, but it's hard to get up there and I'm not interested in whats up there. Then through the doorway takes you to a large balcony separated by a doorway. One guys sleeps on the balcony sometimes, but started to get cold. To the right, is another door, which leads to my mud room, which I share with another American. The beds are are basically wooden boards with a few blankets on top. I don't sleep well. I keep warm, but when I sleep on my side, I feel like my ribs are crushing into me. I must add that it is not the worst bed of my life and my bed in Mongolia was much worse! I mostly stay awake from the mice. The mice on the metal roof and in the walls is absolutely insane!!! I've tried earplugs, I think I put them in wrong. I've tried listening to my Ipod, the stimulation to my brain keeps me awake. The mice are most active between the hours of 11pm and 6 am. They drive me nuts! And up until the other night, dew fell on my face as I was trying to sleep in the morning, which gathered on the metal ceiling. My builder roommate put up plastic to stop this. So nice of him. He's also build a fire oven outside and an outdoor "shower". It's quite impressive the things he comes up with. I think I learn just by watching him. We also have an outhouse... which is..... an outhouse.

We are making the most of our mud mansion.

I am back in Kathmandu after about a week and a half in the town of Mahadav Besi, where I will be spending the next 3 months. The village feels like its in the foothills of the mountains. It is absolutely beautiful. The hills look like they have giant steps, which are the fields where the people get their livelihood. They grow rice, potatoes, cabbage, and whatever else. Their crops are not very diverse but as time goes by, they are widening the variety. The land is green and beautiful and from walking around and talking to people, I am slowly learning more about agriculture. One day, we took a hike down the river and through countless rice fields to one of the nearby waterfalls. It was absolutely beautiful, but hurt as I stuck my head underneath to wash my hair and body. The weather is amazing, with the sun shining basically every day. The temperatures drop around 6 pm as you watch the sun fall behind the mountains. The evenings are not too cold, but then the temperature drops again around 11pm and I am happy I bought a good sleeping bag from the REI used sale right before I left. The night sky is pitch black, with almost no light pollution. The stars illuminate the sky with clarity, but I must admit, the view is nothing compared to that of the countryside sky of Mongolia. Where I live, is along a road that is connected to the "city", which consists of a piece of the main road that is lined with small shops and vegetable venders. Behind the market are a couple schools, the health and police posts, and a few more shops. The roads are full of children in their school uniforms, indicating which school they go to. Throughout the village and the market area are men, children, and women carrying impossibly heavy loads with a strap that goes across their heads. Few people in this area speak English. I find it difficult to meet people, but I have become friendly with 2 people in the market. They are brother and sister and work in a fabric store with their family. They are a Muslim family and I am hoping the girl will take me to the Mosque with her one of these days. I eat lunch at the same place everyday. Nepalis eat Dhal Bhat (rice with vegetables and lentil soup) two times a day. I am not a huge fan of Dhal Bhat and occasionally switch it up with spicey chicken dumplings or vegetarian chow mein (neither of which are very tasty).

The Volunteer work is coming along.... slowly, but I am really excited for some of the work opportunities. There is a group of people who work in the stone-quarry. They have a very difficult life and work hard breaking stones into gravel. They are borderline in a debt bondage situation and I plan on assessing if it is trafficking or not. Other than that, I will be working with 2 women's groups on issues of HIV/AIDS, domestic violence, and sexual abuse awareness, along with communication styles and financial management techniques. I will also be working with a youth group in this area. These people live on the riverbed and work really hard. They live in temporary housing situations but get stuck for more years than intended. I must say, their lives are very difficult but they are a very strong people and live in a very beautiful place. Also, I will be working at a blind children's school and another school. I am excited to dive right in!

We were asked to write a "prophecy" regarding the world. It was very open and we were given 20 minutes to come up with a song, a quote, a picture, to write, or whatever other form we decided to express our feelings about mankind, social justice, or whatever way we interpreted the assignment. Much of it was in Hebrew, so I was not able to understand what most people said or wrote. On the English and visual side; one person took a picture with a black background and money in the foreground, another read the song "wear sunscreen" (or whatever its called), another read a quote from the John Mayor song "waiting for the world to change", someone else referred the group to a movie and a song which concentrate understanding a cycle that people get stuck in and not to judge people based on what "they're best" is. Here's what I wrote:

You exploit your workers til they feel pain, You reap the gain that comes from their daily strain,Good intentions you claim as they're driven insane. They come out maimed as you sit on your thrown in vain.

You keep people down and think that your tough,But what you don't realize is that life for them is rough,And the strength that they have is stronger than your monetary love.With a little help they will get through this stuff,And they'll come out the other side like a diamond in the ruff.

As you lie on your self-proclaimed death bed,You'll realize what you should have done instead,Was to work together to move ahead,and together you could have positively progressed and the road to prosperity you would have led.

Tihar, Diwali, Deepawali. This holiday is really amazing, but also pretty complex. My understanding of it is limited, but I have been trying to learn, and I have definitely been celebrating. There are days to worship different animals; the crow, the dog, and the cow. There is also a day to respect brothers and sisters, where brothers give money to sisters and sisters give tikka (red dot between the eyes) and gifts in return. The animals also receive tikkas and garlands of orange flowers on their respective days. I will describe the first day of Diwali

I left the house and headed to the thamel with no particular goal in mind. I just wanted to wander around and see what happens on this festive evening. I had no idea what to expect. As I walked down the small streets of my section of town, I passed by many families and shop owners making sand pictures on the ground and lighting candles through the entrances of shops and homes. I noticed small crowds of young children singing to shop owners and receiving small rupee notes. It can be slightly compared to caroling, but they all sing one of 2 songs. I continued down the winding streets of closed shops and lights, candles, and celebratory flags strewn everywhere until I ran into a mob of people. It took me a minute to figure out that inside the mob was people singing and dancing "nepali style". The people on the outside of the circle sang and clapped along. I continued on my way to dinner. After dinner, I wandered into the streets of thamel, usually a very touristy place but on this night full of lively nepali singing and dancing. I walked with my new Nepali friend to meet up with some of his friends. He works for a cultural arts organization and him and his friends all play instruments. (i met him as my drum teacher) We joined his friends in an alley of this maze of walking streets where we celebrated life with whiskey, song, dance, 2 drums, and 3 nepali string instruments. (i forgot what they were called) The group finished in this space and moved to the storefronts of one shop to another. I followed their dance moves, their shouts and chants, and they were excited by the lonely westerner joining in the fun. My german friend who I'd met in India passed by the group and we joined him in some bar hopping and people watching. The night ended with a group of 4, each from a different country; America, Nepal, Germany, and Mozambique sitting on the top of a building in Kathmandu. The festivities slowly dispersed as the police tried to get everyone to go home and people just move their celebrations from one corner to the next. We shared cabs home and when I arrived at "the big house", I collapsed in my bed exhausted from the night of song, music, dance, lights, and a whole city celebrating the joys of life. It is amazing to see everyone celebrating the same holiday and really celebrating all together.

I left India and arrived in Kathmandu. The following day, I met up with my volunteer group. We put our luggage on a truck and walked through the bustling streets of Kathmandu to find the house that will be our home for the next month. We are a group of about 25, almost all Israelis. It was interesting to meet the people in the group. Most of them are just starting their travels and this is there first opportunity to travel and volunteer for an extended period. Everyone was so appreciative to be in Nepal and to be here to volunteer. I kinda felt bad because I had mixed emotions about leaving India. I found myself stuck between two amazing experiences. I was not quite ready to leave India, which left me thinking about Indian culture, music, the little bit of hindi and Indian way of think that I've picked up. I'm usually pretty good at taking each experience as it comes, but as I flew to Kathmandu, met with my house mates, and was introduced to the program, I realized that my head was still in India. It's taking a longer time to make it to Nepal than I thought. Though, I find that with each Nepali lesson, I find myself being brought into Nepal. I really look forward to volunteering in the village, and hope to end up as far away from Kathmandu as possible. As I meet these people who have gotten themselves into the unknown for the first time, I remember a little bit what it was like when I first began Peace Corps. The fascination with every tiny change in the ways of life, the wonder how people perform daily tasks without this convenience or that, the excitement of learning a totally new people, culture, and language. I almost miss the excitement. I am really excited about the new people, culture, and language, but I think the differences in way of life have lost some of their excitement. I walk down the street and see the vendors selling tubs for holding water, and I get nostalgic about my ger. I now know, firsthand, that no matter what conveniences are not available, I will be fine and I might even appreciate the simplicity. It is less a challenge, and more an acceptance. Things are "same same but different". The more I travel, the more I find this to be true.

Poverty, Malnutrition, Child Labor, Domestic Violence, Rape, Human Trafficking, Exploitation, Inequality, Unequal distribution of wealth, etc....These are just some of the harsh realities of the world that we live in. These are things that happen all over the world. In India (and I think Nepal), these things feel much more "in your face" (for lack of a better word). Many westerners who travel through India hate it because it makes them uncomfortable. It is so sad for them to see the examples of extreme poverty, it makes them feel guilty for the life they have, and they would much rather return to their ignorance. Where children with pot bellies, skinny arms, covered in flies only exist on their television screen. Where they can send a check to an organization and tell themselves they are not ignoring the rest of the world. It is these blatant challenges to life that I appreciate in a place like India. In India, nobody can pretend that there aren't people who need their help. It is much harder to live your life without being reminded how lucky we are. I wish these westerners would see the harsh lives of these people and realize this is reality. This is the world. Not everything is shiny. One is not necessarily better than the other. It is often the most economically desperate people who know true happiness. Whats bigger is NOT always better. Want and Desire are causes of true suffering (to borrow from buddhist philosophy). I wish people could come, see, experience, help where possible, and most of all LEARN. LEARN. LEARN. Learn from the people, learn from a different way of life, learn from the conditions, learn from your reactions to everything that comes up, learn to appreciate, learn to understand, learn to SEE.

I have so much to write about! I have been really having an amazing trip and I get so caught up on all the experiences that I forget to write in my blog. So, I want to try and give a full and complete update.

INDIAI think that India challenges travelers in every way. While I was there, there were so many situations that came up where I really had to observe my reactions to things and figure out what to do next. I didn't have any of the unsafe experiences that fill the popular attitude of a single female traveling in India alone. I have met many female travelers enjoying a solo journey. When I meet women who have been to India and say they would never travel alone, I can't help but wonder what type of experience they had and what it is that keeps the fear within them. India is an amazing place with beautiful people, along with its many difficulties. I wonder if it's simply their attitude to travel or attitude towards locals. Or maybe they are just not comfortable being on their own without another person as a crutch. It makes me sad that people's own insecurities, misunderstandings, or negative attitudes lead to many misconceptions about India abroad. I spent my second month in India in Mcleod Ganj, the official residence of the Dalai Lama. My time there was as progressive and changing as my traveling period. I began with the Dalai Lama teachings and skipping vipassana. I then spent some time really into yoga and discovering a yoga teacher who I do not now his name, but will remain in my memory for a very long time. I then found myself getting to know many foreigners and locals. I and the people around me progressively formed a small community of people, engaging in musical conversations on a nightly, and sometimes daily, basis. I discovered my musical self. I have never been a very musical person. I am not one of those people who always downloads music, or has music on in the background. Actually, I spend most of my alone time in silence. For a long time, I have wanted to learn to play a certain type of drum, but music was never important enough for me to learn. In Mcleod, I discovered a musical being within myself. I finally bought a Djembe and decided to learn from anyone who wanted to teach me, instead of taking formal lessons. This was to save money, but more importantly because the love that I have developed for music involves people. It is a connection between people and rhythms that creates an atmosphere which is inherently spiritual. No matter what the situation. So, I learned some rhythms on the drum and as I practice have been learning how to also make my own rhythms. Now, I am in Kathmandu and have been missing the music and the people of Mcleod. I find myself in this volunteer house with Indian songs playing in my head and wishing people would suddenly break into the lively song and dance of Mcleod. At first, it appeared I was the only one who brought an instrument. Now, slowly, instruments keep popping up. I have heard a flute somewhere in the house, a guitar was found in one of the rooms, and my roommate used to sing in an acapella (sp?) group. I hope I will find a new musical outlet. The musical conversations of Mcleod were something I had not experienced in my life, and I now feel I can not live without. It will not be the same. But it is impossible to duplicate the bamboo hut on the top of the guesthouse in the foothill of the himalayas. The chilled evening air, beautiful stars in the sky, and the mix of Indians, Tibetans, Nepalese, American, Germans, Dutch, Brazilians, Israelis, Portuguese, Chileans, French, Australians, Kiwis, Mexicans, and many more coming together in song and dance in various languages but speaking the common language of music and movement. Here, we will create a new musical environment and different types of connections. I'm sure the experiences here will be just as beautiful and meaningful as those with Mcleod. I just feel gratitude for all the experiences and people that come by way.

I leave Mcleod Ganj tonight on a bus headed for Delhi. From there, I will take a flight to Nepal and begin a volunteer program. I have stayed in Mcleod Ganj for much longer than I intended. It is a tourist/backpacker haven, which makes me feel guilty for spending so much time here. But at the same time, I have learned A LOT. It is a magical place with nightly vibrations of music, where travellers, Indians, and Tibetans join together in song and dance. I have had the opportunity to make some very good Indian friends. They have taught me about marriage in India, attitudes and opinions towards Tibetan refugees, and the clashes between the Indian way of life and the tourism industry. I plan to write the things that I have discovered, but don't want to spend my last day here on the computer.

I am sad to leave Mcleod and sad to leave India. I feel like I have just scratched the surface of what India has to offer and plan to come back to see south India after Nepal. We'll see how things work out.

Namaste.

As you may have noticed. I have not posted any pictures. I am having a hard time getting my pictures on a computer and am too scared they are all gonna accidentally be deleted. So, you can just google (images) the places that I go :)

It seems that most people who travel to India come with a purpose. Whether it be for the yoga, meditation, religion, trekking, tibetan language, hindi, or the food. Everyone seems to have a purpose to coming to India. Some are searching for something and it is really interesting to see people who come to India searching for answers or for some sort of meaning of life. I think many of these people really just need to look within, however, India seems to have that effect on them Others get so caught up in the buddhism as a way to answer whatever question it is that they have. Before coming here, I had thought about this. I was on the airplane from Chicago to Delhi and I remembered that when I used to read travel stories of India, it often seemed people were either looking for something, or escaping something. I thought hard; why am I going to India? I didn't really have an answer. I wasn't going with any purpose. I chose India because I had heard a lot about it and it was a place that just seemed like it would be interesting. Even while travelling through the first section of my trip, I wondered. Why here? what's here that has drawn me? Still no answer. I am simply here to experience. I am here to travel. I am here to see what happens. And having no plan and no purpose has been one of the very best things about my trip thus far. It has served me well and seems to me to be the BEST way to travel India (for me).

I got to Dharamsala ready for the Dalai Lama teachings. I didn't even know why I was going, simply because everyone seems to get so excited about him and so I felt like I should check it out. I had tickets to see him in Long Beach, but he got sick and I wasn't able to see him. I was disappointed but not devastated. Here, in Dharamsala people were REALLY excited to see him. Innitially, I'd decided to see his teachings because they ended the day I was going to start my Vipassana, so I might as well go early and try to see him speak. And so, I did.

The teachings were about achieving a state of Bodhiccita, a state of beings that kind of serves as a stepping stone to englightenment. Now, I'm no teacher, but what I got out of a lot of the teachings and the talks around the teachings is this:

people want to become the best person they can be. They want to refrain from hurting others, and reach a state of self-realization and truth. They want to create positive energy for the world and to create "good karma" for the benefit of "all sentient beings". Basically, everything that they work hard to achieve is for the greater good of all people and living things.

This, I understand.

However, I was having a hard time with this idea at the same time. I had a hard time understanding how meditation and creating a better self was going to solve many of the worlds problems. I know the buddhist answer to this. According to Buddhism, creating a better self will help you reincarnate into a better being, and if everyone would work on better theirself and releasing themselves and others from suffering, the worlds problems would eventually be fixed. The most basic causes of this suffering are attachment, ignorence, and desire. I could go on and on about this, but I'm not going to. Anyway, to me people seemed pretty "attached" to this "desire" to a achieve or work towards enlightenment. My social worker mind is of couse thinking about the other types of suffering; famine, abuse, and lack of resources. I know the two are intertwined, it's just figuring out how. If only, I could tell people to meditate and to learn to detach themselves from whatever it is that is causing their suffering. If only it were that easy. This thought process, along with a couple other experiences I have had in India (good and bad) have made me realize that India has turned me into a social worker. Through my two years of MSW education, I fought with myself over where I wanted to take it, and even if I was studying the right subject. I graduated and didn't know which direction I was headed. I've never been into planning things, so I was pretty comfortable with this. I headed to India with no particular purpose, but now I feel like India is giving me it's purpose. I am taking yoga and learning from many different experiences and it is helping me form. I don't know where it will take me, but I have realized that India has a lot to teach social workers. I almost consider this as a part of my social work education. For the first time ever, I actually WANT to take the things that I am learning and will continue to learn and use it in social work practice. For me, thats a BIG step in a new direction. There are tons of things to learn here and I will be making the most out of these opportunities. I'm not saying I'm on a quest to search for opportunities related to social work, but I will say that I have finally discovered that I am naturally inclined in that direction. Without even trying, I happen upon experiences that will help me to better serve others. In this way, my meditation and learning is benefiting "all sentient" beings, and I don't have to become a nun. I'm still figuring out all the details and inter-relatedness, but in due time, it will come. The other day, I had just finished my yoga lesson and I was just thinking about some things and I realized that for the first time, I KNOW that I got my masters degree in the right field.

I do not concentrate on the future, I only concentrate on the present, but I know that these experiences are shaping my future in a way that only time will show what is to come.

Additionally, I have decided to keep this blog up to date. I never really know what I'm going to write, but I have realized that the majority of people that I know will never make it to India. Because of this, I guess I feel a sense of responsibility to share my experiences. To give others a taste of India that they would otherwise not have. Though the people reading this are getting a taste of "my" India, it is a perspective that does not exist anywhere else and will never exist again. India is giving me it's gift and I am giving my gift.

I have now been in Mcleod for a little more than 10 days. I really love it here. There are too many foreigners, but in a way that's good too. It like a little subculture in itself. I have had many great experiences and have met tons of great people. I am at the point where I walk around and run into friends all over the place (tibetan, indian, and other travellers). I have been enjoying the yoga classes the most. I have been going every day (except today) and sometimes twice a day. Yoga here does not feel the same as yoga at home. At home we are so over-obsessed with working out and physique that yoga has taken on a totally different meaning. Here, the yoga is all about being mindful of your breathing, doing the postures correctly wo that you can reach maximum benefit, and minding your own practice. Maximum benefit in yoga here does not refer to loosing weight or being flexible, it is about maximizing the flow of energy in your body. I feel like I could stay here and take yoga classes forever! I have also attended a few other "functions". One was to listen to a tibetan ex-political prisoner speak about his experience, and another has been to volunteer in a conversation class with other tibetan ex-political prisoners. The plight of the Tibetans is something that we, in the U.S., know very little about. This town is filled with Tibetans seeking refuge and hoping to one day be able to safely return to their homeland. (though, I"m sure some want to stay here too) I have been increasing my knowledge about the Tibet but still do not feel knowledgable enough to be teaching. So, with that I say, go research Tibet and find information about what is going on there. Additionally, I have been reading a book called, The Jew in the Lotus. It has somewhat lost my interest now, but the first half of the book is very interesting. It talks about a dialogue between the Dalai Lama and some Jewish rabbis. It also compares and contrasts the Tibetans and the Jews.

The eclectic mix of people here is really amazing to observe. Every night there is people playing live music on top of one of the guesthouses. It is a mix of Indians, Israelis, Brits, and much more (korean, american, german, dutch, etc...). I started to learn how to play the drum ( i forget what kind it's called) with this Austrian girl. I want to take lessons, but at the same time I feel it is time to move to my next place. I am stuck with deciding where to go. Here are the places that I'm thinking about:

Leh is supposed to be absolutely beautiful and the ride from Manali to Leh is an adventure in itself. There is trekking up there and it is at a really high altitude. I have heard stories of people having a hard time with the altitude and also of buses getting stuck.

Manali is also supposed to be beautiful, it is much closer and I'll probably head there next, then decide...

Rishikesh is known for it's yoga and I have looked into a yoga ashram that includes yoga, meditation, and teachings

Kashmir is a place I've heard a lot about in reading about in India, but have only met a couple people who have visited. One guy told me he didnt' feel like tourists were welcome there. Its strange for me, realizing that I'm a tourist :) Anyway, I have made some friends from there and I could go with them to visit.

I will decide soon.....

The freedom to be able to go anywhere and do anything is really amazing. I was sitting at dinner with some people and these two girls just randomly decided to head to Bali together. It was awesome to watch the process and to watch their excitement grow as their realized they were really gonna do it!

I've said it before and I'll say it again, EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE (sub kuch milega)

I arrived in Dharamsala and immediately took a bus to Mcleod Ganj, the part of Dharamsala that holds the official residence of the Dalai Lama. I had heard that you can see his teachings for free (rather than the $150 I'd seen to register online). So, I dropped my stuff at a guesthouse and headed out to find out where to sign up. It wasn't very hard to find the line of (mostly foreigners) waiting to register at the last minute to see the teachings. I got my registration card and spent the rest of the day figuring out what is where. When I found the temple, I saw the are filled with blankets and pillows, some marked with people's names. I wasn't sure if I was supposed to pick a spot, so I decided to keep the meditation pillow that I just bought with me, and I'd find a spot in the morning.

I woke up early and headed for the main temple. I found a free place to sit and watched the people trickle in. Tibetans, Indians, and foreigners from all over the world found their places and awaited the arrival of the Dalai Lama. Some of the foreigner groups found their designated signs which read, "Japanese translations", "Korean", "spanish/portuegese", etc... People did their cora (not sure how you spell it, but it's when they walk 3 times around the temple usually with prayer beads and uttering mantras under their breath). I could see the "om mani padme hum, om mani padme hum" coming out of the lips of people from all over the world. I sat and observed. The leader of the Southeast Asian group (the people who payed $150) started chanting a beautiful matra over the speakers as the place FILLED. There were people everywhere. A person in this place can not be in need of the "personal space" that we cherish so much in the U.S.

Finally, the chanting stopped and people started to slightly rise in hopes to catch a glimpse of the Dalai Lama. He entered the temple accompanied by security and a few monks. You could feel the excitement in the air. He walked into the temple and took his seat. Everyone stood out of respect and once he sat down, most of the monks, nuns, and others around me performed their 3 prostrations to the Dalai Lama and to the giant Buddha behind him. We sat down and I got ready with my radio to listen to the English translation. He started with a few prayers and then with an buddhism introduction in ENGLISH. I was surprised, and so were the tibetans around me. I handed my radio to the Tibetan nun next to me as she frantically wondered what he was saying. She became my learning partner throughout the 3 days, as we shared the radio, tea, and tibetan bread. The Dalai Lama talked in English about some basic buddhist ideas including; detachment, love and compassion, helping others, the fact that you don't have to be a buddhist to gain from buddhism, quoted the buddha on finding your own truth, and shared a few jokes of his own. He then explained that he is not confident in his English and switched to Tibetan as he went through a 2 day teaching on the Bodissatva (sp?). The book he was teaching about it a book that explains how to reach "Bodhiccitta" (sp?), which is basically a state of being that is like a stepping stone to attaining enlightenment. The first day was intense. He covered a lot of material and some very complex ideas. It was hard for me to follow everything, but I also found myself drawn to his teachings. I am not a Dalai Lama follower. I have not watched any of his teachings on Youtube and have never read any of his books. However, I must say; some people come with a certain presence that draws others to them. He has a very light (as in the weight) state of being. I left the teaching with questions and a little bit of confusion, and at the same time a feeling that I had just recieved a teaching from a very smart person. In a way, I felt lucky to have learned from him, as you feel lucky when you realieze you have recieved a really great professor. Only, he is teaching about life.

While heading out of the temple at the end of the first day, I ran into a foreigner who I'd met at a restaurant the night before. He asked me what I thought of the teachings and I explained to him that it was a lot of information. He informed me about a review at a nearby meditation center, where I'd be able to ask questions. I ate and rested a little, then headed for the review session. The walk was absolutely beautiful! At the foothills of the Himalayas, Dharamsala is made up of breathtaking views of massive "hills" filled with trees. I made it to the review and asked a few questions and gained more of an understanding of what the Dalai Lamas teachings are all about.

Day #2 of the teachings started out in the same way as day #1. As I saw the people finding their seats, I realized how lucky I was that I happened to end up in a seat with a clear view of the Dalai Lama. People sit in the same seat for the whole teaching, but most foreigners (including myself) didn't know this ahead of time. So, people would switch around and the monks and nuns would say nothing. There was one lady (australian, I think) who seemed pretty frustrated and chose not to be quiet about her state of being. Maybe she needed the teachings more than others. For day #2, I felt like the Dalai Lama had really become my teacher. I had more of an understanding of the teachings, and found a copy of the text in English so I could follow along better, and I guess there was slightly less amazement. I still felt lucky. I once again attended the review session. I found myself a bit frustrated with some of the teaching and there was a section that I really wanted to dive into. I didn't get the chance. (i will explain a little about this in another post)

Day #3 of the Dalai Lama teachings was very different. It was full of people taking laypersons vows, and vows of refuge in the 3 jewels of buddhism. It was filled with blessings from the Dalai Lama, red strings, and red blindfolds. It followed with a slew of white (khataks, in Mongolian) prayer scarves, which I had learned in Mongolia were for teachers. I almost left early, but something kept me there. In the end, I was glad I had stayed. I had moved my seat closer to the door and had watched as everyone made their prostrations and accepted their blessings. I took a few blessings and vows of my own, keeping within my own sense of being. (ie: no vows of celibacy or not to drink alcohol for me) It was actually a very beautiful ceremony and I now wear my red string, which have been blessed by the Dalai Lama on my wrist as a reminder of the teachings and blessings that I recieved.

After the ceremony, I headed out with the rest of the blessed mob and ran into the same friend at a coffee shop. I sat there and debated if I was going to start my 10 days of silent Vipassana meditation that day. I didn't feel ready and felt like I had a lot of opportunities for learning in Mcleod Ganj and I didn't want to be in 1 place for 10 days. I bailed. Looking back, I think it was the right decision.

During today's downpour I'll update this blog :)

From Agra, I headed to Delhi. I didn't do too much in Delhi. I was pretty focused on getting over that cold and not feeling so tired all the time. I stayed with my friend in Delhi and the city is so big that I was somewhat overwhelmed with what to do. People say that the Red Fort and the Mosque are not to be missed. I will see them next time I'm in Delhi. I went to a few cool places with my friend's friends and had a night on the town. I did take the opportunity to visit the Mohatma (sp?) Gandhi museum. I was actually much more impressed with it than I was expecting. It was filled with quotes and example of his leadership. It was also the sight of his assassination. They showed his home and how he lived, along with all the different political activities he was involved in. What a great man.

I will see more of Delhi next time...

I had to leave Varasani at some point, though I could have stayed longer. I boarded a train and headed for Agra.

Anyway, I boarded the train, only to find that I had been put in a part of the train with all the tourists. The ride wasn't too bad, I got some sleep, sat and talked a little bit, and then we arrived in Agra. You could see the Taj Mahal almost immediately. I shared a tuk tuk with another guy to the guesthouse. We arrived and after checking in, I checked out the rooftop view. It was AMAZING! The Taj Mahal looks exactly like in the pictures! I was feeling pretty tired and weak, left over from being sick. I fell asleep and basically slept the whole day. At night, I went to the top of the guesthouse to eat and look at the view again. It was pretty cloudy out, but still as the sky changed colors from the slow descent of the sun, so did the Taj. It turned shades of blue and then shades of purple. Even in the darkness of night the Taj can be seen pretty clearly. I vowed not to sleep the following day and go see the Taj up close.

In the morning, I woke up still feeling pretty weak but knowing that I wanted to leave Agra the following day. I rustled myself out of bed, took a cold shower (feels wonderful in the heat of the Monsoon season), and headed out to see this magnificent building. I'm not one to be particularly impressed by architecture, but the Taj Mahal is an exception. And to think about the man-power and labor that went into constructing this building is insane. You walk through the entrance and you are immediately inside a post card. You know the one, with the water leading up to the Taj. People are taking all sorts of fun pictures. This is unfortunately the only point that I got a picture of myself with the Taj because my batteries died before I left. I walked down the steps and found my way to the entrance of the actual building, after taking off my shoes, of course. The marble and intricately inlaid stones into beautiful flower designs are seriously impressive. I walked around and looked at everything, but in light of my utter exhaustion, I felt like I couldn't appreciate it the way I wanted to. I walked towards the exit and was happy to see people sitting and laying down in the shade of the Taj, enjoying the cool marble. I joined the crowds and passed out in my little corner. Once I got up, I was feeling a bit better and decided to go through the Taj again. I took my time looking at the flower designs and beautiful Arabic in the marble. I then walked out and into part of the gardens in front of the Taj. This is when I found myself looking back to make sure this majestic building was really there. It had a strange translucence to me. As if it could be a mirage in the dehydrated mind of a human in the desert. I sat on a bench and just enjoyed the scenery filled with interested Indians and foreigners admiring the Taj and the beautiful trees, plants, and tiny squirrels. I allowed some Indians to take pictures with me, wrote in my journal, people-watched, watched people watching me, and admired the beauty of the three great buildings in sight. Once I got up, I wandered around the Mosque and the 'other' building (built for symmetry), looked around the not as impressive museum, and wandered along the wall of Indian sights to see. Eventually, I was hesitant to leave, but it was time for me to head back for a skype meeting.

The next day, I left Agra. There's not a whole lot in Agra, but there is ruins of an ancient town not too far out the city and also the Agra Fort that people visit. I wouldn't have minded seeing these things, but wasn't set on them either. I decided to concern my energy and hop on a train to Delhi, where I could rest a bit and get ready to head to Dharamsala.

Once again, I bought the lowest class ticket and bumped it up once the train came. Part of me almost feels guilty for doing this, like I should just ride in the lowest class.... I will at some point of my trip, when I don't have a giant bag. The lower class tickets are standing room only, and you know those pictures you see of people in India stuffed into and hanging out of buses? Well, it's like that, but in a train and VERY hot! It almost reminds me of some pictures from the holocaust of people stuffed in trains, but there are windows and these people are free to get on and off as they please.

I am in Delhi now and will see some of the cool things here, but so far have just been resting up.

Varanasi:According to the Lonely Planet India, otherwise known as "my bible", Varanasi is one of the oldest consistently inhabited cities in the world. It has been knocked down and rebuilt a few times, but it continues to exist. If I remember correctly, the ancient name of Varanasi is Kashi... google it. I arrived to Varanasi so proud of myself that I had gotten on the right train and gotten off at the right stop all by myself. I was immediately shuffled into an auto-rickshaw by a guy trying to convince me to stay at a guesthouse of his friend. I emphatically declined and was convinced to stay at the guesthouse that works with the Brown Bread Bakery, a German organization who engages in development work and receives a percentage of the guesthouse bill for the Live for Life (something like that) foundation. The rickshaw-wallah (man) drops me off in front of an alley telling me at 5am that I need to wander down these alleys to find the right place. After some hesitation, I pay the man and head down the alleys. Within 10 minutes, I feel a bucket of presumably dirty water being dumped on my head. I was pissed! I look up see someone's linens out to dry and I assume that's where the water came from. On purpose or a thoughtless mistake, I don't really care. Luckily, I'm already filthy from the travel and the hot muggy weather. I continue down this maze of back alleys and tiny streets littered with sleeping people, and ask a few people along the way where this bakery is. Most aren't so sure. A very short man in a surong is trying to convince me to follow him, saying their are 3 guesthouses when I run into Spanish guys looking for the same bakery. I tell them that I'm a little uncomfortable and am gonna stick with them, only to have them wish me well on my way. (in my head at this moment: F this city, I'm gonna see the burning places and get the heck out of here!) I follow the short man and eventually the Spanish guys show up again headed to the same guesthouse I am and invite me to join them in checking that one out. We head in, I check out a few rooms and pick one. I shower and sleep.

When I wake up, I'm feeling a bit groggy and read the Varanasi chapter in the Lonely Planet. I basically just wander out of the guesthouse to start figuring out where the heck I am. I am immediately shuffled into a massive crowd of people heading towards the fires. Dead bodies burning. I get skiddish and convince this 'guide man' that I'd rather watch from afar, with respect to the families, and secretly for my own comfort. I finally rid myself of this mans unwanted company and start heading back to my guesthouse in an effort to make sure I remembered where it was. Before I get there, another guy starts talking to me. I start to brush him off when he starts saying, "that's the problem with you tourists. You want to come see the sights, but you don't want to learn. Why did you come to India?" I eventually let this guy talk me into sitting for a cup of chai (tea) and I'm glad I did. This guy was actually really cool. I met a few of his friends and spent the next few days hangin around the city with them.

On my first day there, I attended a Shivah ceremony filled with smoke, loud drums, incense, an old holy man with grey dreads, and the loud chimming of the thick bronze bells. We were in a circle in the small Shivah temple. Outside the window was a few other foreigners sitting and listening to a man explain to them about the burning ghat. Past them was the ritual burning of bodies.

Here's what I learned:The bodies must be burned within 24 hours of death. The family pays for the wood, which is relatively cheap, and the bodies take about 4 hours to burn. The family stays in the area while the body is burning and take the time to wash in the Ganga (Ganges). On women, the hips are the last thing to complete burning and on men, it is their chest. This is because the chest is most strong in men from hard work and the hips are most strong in women from child birth. After the burning of the body, the family returns to someone's home for a small ceremony. The women do not attend the burning because one time a women jumped in the fire. Also, nobody cries. Tears are believed to taint the burning in some way (i forget exactly). The bodies are burned to get rid of the person's sins before they are returned to where they came from, the Ganga. There are 4 types of bodies that are not burned because they are already pure: a pregnant women, a child, a person with lepracy, a Brahmin, or a holy man. These bodies are brought on the same stretchers as the burning bodies but are wrapped in a light cloth. They are then tied to a large cement slab and some of the family takes the body on a boat to the middle of the river, where the body is ceremoniously dropped into the water. Sometimes, the bodies come undone from the cement and this is when you see bodies floating down the river. The Ganga is seen as the holy Mother for people all over India. The people who have the job of actually burning the bodies are of a lower class. They gather the ashes and empty them into the Ganga, also sifting for gold. If bones are found not fully cremated, they are taken on a boat and dropped in the middle of the Ganga. Also, every evening there is a ceremony performed by two Brahmins that is dedicated to the Ganga.

Spending time in Varasani, it is impossible not to see the procession of a family chanting a mantra, carrying the body of a loved-one on a bamboo-made stretcher. The body is cover with a bright, gold colored cloth. I think they burn at least a hundred bodies a day at the burning ghat, the main holy burning sight. There are many other places throughout India that are appropriate for burning, but this one has a special significance. It is inappropriate for people to take pictures of the burnings or of the procession of the dead bodies.

The city of Varanasi is a mix of tiny old streets, almost resembling those of parts of old Jerusalem. The streets are packed with people and lined with food, cotton clothing, and silk shops. There also cows and buffalo who add to this interesting little place. I loved sitting on the empty steps of an unused building, sipping chai and watching as the buffalo wade in the water. They dip there heads just slightly and seem to be in utter enjoyment as the cool water slides over their face. I didn't know until this trip that buffalo and cows could swim. This is the high season for the Ganga and it was interesting to see pictures of beach and parts of the city that are under water 3 months out of the year. Everything moves up, into the city as the water rises. A friend explained to me that normally, the burnings are much lower and they are separated by class. He said one thing he liked about this time of year is that all the burnings are done together, regardless of class. This is the young person's mind next to ancient tradition.

I'm not in Veranasi, where they burn the bodies at the Ganges. I seriously hated it the first hour I was here, but have grown to really like it a lot. I leave in 2 days for Agra to see the Taj Mahal.

I could write forever. Some things I would write about:

-All the crazy ideas and warnings about India have not been validated to me yet. I have had no harassment, have taken risks, and have met some really awesome and fun people.

-Food: it's not what we, Americans, think of when we think of Indian food.

-Diversity: India is INCREDIBLY diverse in land, people, and culture

Namaste

I arrived in Bodhgaya at night time, not a clue where my guesthouse was. I started asking around and after heading down what seemed like a shady street, I headed to an internet cafe and the nice boys working there called the guesthouse. They explained it was down that street that I wasn't so comfortable with, but when I didn't seem happy about that they directed me to a closer guesthouse. I followed their instructions and what invited on the motorcycle of an Indian man. I am hesitant to get on Motorcycles and even more hesitant a motorcycle of a random man in the middle of the night. He saw this and rode slowly until we found another foreigner walking on the street who was headed to the same guesthouse. I went with her and we found our way, thanks to my handy headlamp. I checked in and retired for the night. The next day, I read the chapter in the lonely planet and set out for whatever was to come. I headed to the Bodhi tree and temple where Siddartha is said to have achieved enlightenment, becoming the buddha. On my way there, tons of people tried to sell me things, offered me a tuk tuk, and even to show my way to the tree. These two boys started walking with me. At first, I was somewhat annoyed, knowing I wasn't going to give them any money for a "tour". Then they talked about practicing their English and I remembered a good friend of mine in the Peace Corps who lived in a nearby town that had a major tourist sight for Mongolia. Her English students would hang around the monastery and practice their English with the tourists. I talked to them for a minute while I walked to the enterance of the temple and left them there. I entered and noticed the tourists from all over India and the world. There was a huge delegation of Sri Lankans engaged in a pilgrimage to this holy site. I sat at the tree for a while and appreciated all the worshipers. It didn't take long for one of my friends from outside to find me with his other friend. I sat and talked to them for a while and people would come up and for a photo with me. I agreed and my new friends explained that they were from other parts of India and had probably never seen a white person before. I spent the whole day walking and talking with my new friends, who ask people for money for their school, but they never did ask me for $. They explained to me how the felt about tourists. The state of Bihar is one of the poorest states in India and some of the scenery in the state is that you would find when looking at pictures of Africa. People just as dark as Africa, carrying things on their heads, colorful saris, working hard, and extreme poverty. Bodhgaya is filled with monasteries built in the cultural fashion of many different countries. I visited most of them in one day, and the last 2 another day. There is also a giant statue of the Buddha, which I found somewhat less impressive, but other people really enjoyed. It's neat to look at, but seems a little anti-buddha to me. Bodhgaya was a very interesting place, but I was sick and the mosquitos drove me absolutely insane.

The way out of Darjeeling was an adventure. I was told there was a bus leaving from a nearby town, Siliguri, every half hour until 8pm. They lady even called to confirm. Apparently she didn't call the bus people because I arrived at 630 (already dark) and the last bus heading toward my next destination was sitting full, ready to head out. I tried and tried to talk my way into a seat on the bus and was sent back and forth in the night, talking to different people to figure out what to do. I finally accepted the fact that I was not getting on that bus and started asking about trains. Supposedly, there was a train leaving at 10pm from the nearby train station, but I couldn't confirm this until I went to the train station. Rickshaw and tuk tuk drivers tried to get me to pay 100 and 150 rupees to get to the train station. I held off and paid 20 in the end. I arrived at the train station and stepped over people selling vegetables in the street, through tuk tuks and tuk tuk drivers trying to get me to go places that I wasn't going, and over and through sleeping bodies who looked like they'd set up camp at the train station. My introduction to the train stations in India. Now I know, tons of people sleep in the train stations. And it actually might be one of the safer places to sleep if I' m ever in a bind. I'm talking full families, camped out with cooking supplies and all. I waited in line and noticed the lines were filled with men. I shrugged at this and waited... until people started edging me to the front of the line. I had noticed the sign marked "ladies", but it didn't seem to lead to anything, so I'd kinda ignored it. I finally realized after people pushing me forward saying "ladies first" that women are allowed to go right in front, while the men wait patiently in line. I'll take it. I got to the front and explained that I wanted to go to Putna, which would lead me to a bus headed for Bodhgaya. She agreed but then explained that this counter is not for sleeper class, it is just for _____ class (i don't remember what it's called). At this point I was hot and tired and feeling a little frustrated, so I didn't pay much attention and just agreed, as long as I got on that train. A ticket in my hand, I was relieved. I stepped over sleeping bodies and through family and friendly dinners as I scoured the train station. I had a few hours to kill and wanted to become oriented before I joined the crowds sitting on the ground. I figured out what was where; the first class women's waiting room, the first class men's waiting room, platforms 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5, the signs that announce first in Hindi, then in English what trains are arriving and the status of the other trains. Finally, I realized I was about to embark on a 12 hour journey and when I saw people benched up on the train, looking pretty hot and uncomfortable, I probably wanted the sleeper class. EVERYTHING IS POSSIBLE IN INDIA. This is a saying that I have heard since the first moment I arrived in India. I found my way to a help desk and asked what I need to do to change my ticket to sleeper class. They sent me to another office. I never found that office, but when I found a different office and asked they said better that I get on the train sitting in the station now, waiting to part for my destination. This train I didn't know about. I had been told the next train wasn't for a few hours. I listened to the man and found my way to the train. I asked the men near the train how I change to sleeper class; one younger man lead me to about 4 other men one after another, and finally me onto the train into my new sleeper class seat. He didn't really ask for $, but I didn't want any problems later, so I asked how much. I paid 100 rupees and asked if he needed to write something on my ticket. Behind him, an older man said not to worry about it and that he'd be sleeping in the seat next to me and if there was a problem he'd take care of it. (how nice of him) Throughout the ride, this man treated me with the Indian hospitality that I have learned about, buying me tea and treats on the train, interested in my India and English books, and watching my bag as I watched his when headed for the bathroom. At the beginning I was weary of him, but it didn't take long to realize he was just a nice man. In the end, I ended up giving him one of my books as a thank you for making sure I was alright and that I got off at the right stop. Lesson of the train system: know the name of the train station, not just the city where I'm going. I got off the train and took a rickshaw through the crazy streets of Putna to where I could catch a bus to Bodhgaya. I arrived in one piece :)

After Assam, I headed for Darjeeling. This was my first "traveling" experience in India, where I had to figure everything out on my own. I boarded the correct plane, arrived safely, and took an airport cab up to Darjeeling. Darjeeling, known for it's tea, is a small town on the side of a hill. It is literally sprawled on the side of the hill/mountain, no flattening anything. The ride up is not for the weak at heart, as is no ride or transportation in India. But the ride was absolutely breathtaking and we proceeded up the windy road passing through beautiful, lush, tropical scenery with waterfalls, and the higher we went the more exposed the view of the valley became. It was on and off raining and it felt like we were climbing into the clouds. The one lane road was filled with two-way traffic and thoughts of slipping down off the road were blocked from my mind, which was filled with the impressive landscape. Upon arrival, I was dropped off at the taxi area. I had picked a guesthouse out of my "bible", the lonely planet, and basically just asked around. Everyone was super friendly, and the police handed my a not-s0-legible map of Darjeeling. I hiked up and around the road in the light mist and found my guesthouse without trouble, other than my lungs' acknowledgement of the altitude. I arrived in the guesthouse, checked into my tiny, but quaint and very inexpensive room. I headed to the restaurant on the top of the guesthouse, had some tea and food and retired for the night. In the morning, I scanned the Darjeeling chapter in the lonely planet and decided some of the sights that I might want to see. I'm not too good at finding things, and I didn't want to walk around with my giant lonely planet in my hand, so I basically just started walking. I noticed the tibetan influence of this city right away and found a certain comfort in the familiarity of Mongolia. I was walking around with no direction and decided I'd start with seeing a monastery. I had no idea that Darjeeling is filled with Monasteries. I just asked a guy on the street where's the nearest monastery, and followed the school children down a narrow path until I eventually found one. It was closed. I walked around and noticed the 2 other foreigners taking pictures. They left. There was a monk making prayers in the 2nd floor of the monastery. I looked up, trying to figure out where it was coming from, and found the monk looking out the window at me. He invited me up. I found my way up the stairs and entered his tiny room, sans the shoes. I sat in silence as I watched and listened to his prayers, mantra, and drums. It again reminded me of Mongolia. Some of the men in the Monastery even kind of looked Mongolian. Monks would peer into the room, I assumed from seeing the foreigners shoes outside. They'd smile and disappear. When the meditation was over, I thanked the monk, who didnt speak any English and got lost finding my way back up towards where I was staying. I loved my short time in Darjeeling, but I'd heard its a lot like Nepal and it reminded me a lot of Mongolia. I planned to head out and my last day, I made some tourist friends and directed them to the tibetan refugee center, which I'd hiked to the day before. Me and one other guy headed for the zoo. The zoo had some interesting animals, but I'm not the hugest fan of animals in cages. What was cool was the Everest mountaineering museum. I am absolutely impressed by the people who climb Everest and the museum helped me gain an understanding of the Himalayas, which in a better time of year are viewable from my guesthouse. I hope to do some hiking around the base of some of these impressive mountains.

INDIA!!! (i'm going to do my best for a full update before my internet time is up) p.s... the shift button doesn't work, so forgive me for lack of capitalization.

After having a blast in Michigan and New York, I set out for INDIA. I used to talk about traveling India, but there was a part of me that wasn't sure when/if I'd ever make it.

1st 24 hours in India:

While in NY, I had a arranged to meet a friend of a friend in New Delhi, India. That is the only 'plan' that I had at that point. When I arrived to India (around 7pm), I had the cab driver call this friend and we found my way to the flooded garden that led to this friend's apartments. That night, I decided to join him to his family's house in the northeastern state of Assam. He was leaving in the morning, so I bought my ticket online and hoped for the best. In the morning, as we were getting ready to head to the airport, his maid (for lack of a better word) came, cleaned the dishes, set out toast, and did whatever else she does. This was my first interaction with the 'help' of India. Turns out, it was just a taste into what I was about to dive into. We headed to the airport and all I could think about was my friend, Karishma, in the states who is deathly afraid to fly ever since she nose-dived in an airplane in a local flight in India. We didn't nose-dive :) Upon arrival, I met Nalin's mom and driver. We drove through the streets of Guwahati through lush green, tropical landscapes, to one of the most beautiful homes I've seen in a while. I could tell they were quite well-off as the gate man opened the gate, unleashing the tropical paradise that serves as their yard. They have beautiful flowers, exotic trees, a small lake, and a nice porch to enjoy the scenery. The dog took a liking to me, and I didn't enjoy his slobber. The next few hours were filled with lots of friendly conversation and good food with Nalin's family. This was my introduction to the four approximately 15 year olds cooking and cleaning for this family. They live there and work very hard. I took a liking to a few of the girls, but they were pretty shy around me. It took me some getting used to, but I knew I had to learn how things work here. Later, I found out that the girls are able to buy land and houses for their families, and don't necessarily speak Hindi. They speak a mixture of Hindi and some native dialect. I don't know what part of India these girls were from. After 2 years of studying human trafficking and child labor, I found myself conflicted, not sure how to act or what to think. So, I thought nothing, and just observed. This is a new country with a new way of life. Nalin's family are the nicest and most friendly, hospitable and welcoming people ever! They fully welcomed me into their home, gave me a room and his mom took it upon herself to make sure that I had lots of cultural learning experiences; something I am so grateful for. Their family owns a tea farm... or tea company... or something like that. They ship tea off to be mixed and packaged and sold. The business obviously serves them well. I attended the 2nd day of a wedding, which consisted of a colorful assortment of Indian food and Indian versions of other food. I tried a little bit of almost everything. Nalin's mom and her friends were so friendly and made sure that I was able to experience. And I was surprised by how agreeable they were to the fact that I was traveling India without a plan. At the wedding, I was impressed with all the beautiful saris and bracelets that decorated the women.

We left the wedding and headed back home, where I met up with Nalin. We went out and met with some of his friends, went to a small club with a live band, rather weak drinks, beer, lots of fun dancing people. While in Assam, I was definitely the only foreigner around, but people's English and knowledge of America was so good that sometimes I forgot. After the club, we went back to the house and went to sleep. I woke up in the morning and was laying on my bed, when Nalin's mom came in and said their was a massage lady at the house and asked if I wanted a massage. I hesitated, asked how much, waved me off, and I agreed. I had a massage in one of the rooms of the house for about an hour and a half. I think the rest of the days in Assam were mostly filled with food, relaxation, and getting over my jetlag. One of the days, they had the driver take me to a bunch of the famous temples which are in the area and another day they made sure I tried traditional Assamese food. I was so greatful for their amazing generosity and hospitality. I have been keeping in touch with Nalin and will meet up with him in Delhi at some point. Also, I invited him to meet me when I get to a surfing spot and promised to teach him to surf.

So, this post and the 3 before need to be read in order. first the one called 'playing catch up', then he one with all the pictures and this one. the pictures need to be looked at from bottom to top. and here's the captions from bottom to top:

bottom:

Khentii river (where the pig roasts)

Snow in June??? We're from CA, we don't play that game!

Monastery ruins

The album cover (my tourist group)

Camping

Sand dunes

Flaming cliffs

Can't ever beat the Mongolian sky

The Porgon, driver, and tour guide

(on the right) ice gorge

(on the left) Dinner

Beautiful Omngovi

(next 5 pics) the process that leads to deliciousness! (not for vegetarians)

two humped camels

Country

(on the right) just past sunset

(on the left) mongol on the sand dunes

Meditation seminar

My new Tattoo (great mongolia)

My new Israeli friend

(2 on the right) Irden Zuu

one leg to our private concert

(on the right) Me and my little brother

(on the left) Arv at night

The past month or so has been quite interesting for me. In order to make sure I cover the major bases, I will separate them into chunks:

1. Khentii and COS conference

2. Gobi Desert

3. Meditation Retreat

4. Harhorin and Israelis

5. What's next?

1. Khentii and COS conference:

I left my site headed for the not-so-kosher Khentii Pig Roast, and annual tradition among the Peace Corps Volunteers in Khentii. This is where they buy a big, kill it, skin, clean, and chop it and then cook it on a fire near the river. I did not go last year, but decided to go this year since it was immediately before my COS conference. It was a good time of sun, beer, and good food... though I don't eat pig. Those of us headed out to Chingis' homeland piled into a Microbus and were fortunate enough to have a comfortable and timely trip both ways. This was a part of my efforts to see more of Mongolia before I head out. After a few days of hanging out by the river we headed back to UB for out COS conference. This is our final Peace Corps gathering where we talk about all the paperwork and medical appointments we must do before we can leave. It's a surprising amount of work. I am officially set to leave Mongolia July 24th. We also spent some time talking about resume's, cover letters, and what its going to be like trying to adjust and find a job in America. The most interesting part was talking about some of the things we will miss the least, what we have done, and how we think Mongolia has effected us. It was interesting to see everyone's answers.

2. Gobi Desert

Following COS conference, I had about a week to kill that I didn't have to be at work. I was going to take the bus out to Omngovi and try and find my way around. At the very last minute, I decided to join a tourist group who was headed out the next day. This proved to be a good decision. Omngovi is very big and I would have had no idea where I wanted to go. It was definitely a different way of travelling mongolia than I am used to. I found myself spending a lot of time with the guide and the driver. It is obvious they are not used to having people who speak Mongolian on their trips. I could understand just about everything they said. And I also learned some new vocabulary words. I was on the trip with 4 other people; a german, a danish, and 2 americans. We had a really good time. I found myself explaining certain things about Mongolia and Mongolian culture and I really started to realize how much I love this country. It was really interesting seeing all their reactions to things.... especially the amount of camel pictures they took. I ended up with a lot of great photos from this trip. The guide asked me what my favorite Mongolian food was and I said "horhog". (this is the REAL Mongolian bbq) Him and the guide decided we would do horhog before I left the trip. So, one day, we were driving through the desert and stopped at a herd of goats and sheep. We bought a goat and took him in the car to where we spent the next few days. It was a beautiful place right next to the sand dunes.

The killing:

One of the men took the goat and layed him on his back. He cut a small cut, maybe four inches thick. He stuck his hand inside and pinched the main artery. The goat died immediately and without any cries for help. It was all very humane and it showed they'd done it millions of times. Once the goat was dead, they took the goat inside the ger and started to take the skin off. Still, there was no evidence of blood. Once the skin was separated and the insides taken out, they took a bowl and collected the blood. Every part of this goat was used for something. Mongolians don't waste. The good parts to eat were separated and hung ready to be cooked. The innards were taken to the other ger and given to the family hosting us. (we weren't going to eat them) A little later we started to make the horhog. First, rocks were collected and heated in the fire. Once they were hot, they were put in the togoo (big cooking bowl) with the meat, some salt, potatoes, and carrots. Horhog cooks over a hot fire. When it was ready, we feasted. It was delicious. The way you eat horhog is simple. You pick up a bone with meat on it, and you rip off the meat until the bone is clean. You get grease all over your hands and face. When you are done eating, you pick up a hot rock and hold it in your hands. This is supposed to be good for your health. You then rub the grease into your skin and wash your hands when you are ready. After every horhog, you must take a shot of vodka. This is to help your stomach digest the food.

After we ate, we hiked up the sand dunes and tried to get there in time for the sunset. Some of us didn't quite make it for the sunset but it was still a beautiful scene when we reached the top. The colors the sky creates over the sand dunes is really amazing. I was sure to fill my water bottle with sand. Gobi sand is found all over the world. Hiking up the sand dunes was quite a task. With every step you take, you slide down at least half the distance. Later we realized we had simply gone up the wrong part. haha.

The day, I woke up early and helped the guide by making hushuur while he got ready for other things. I realized in my time there how comfortable in Mongolia and around Mongolians I have become. I gained an overwhelming feeling of not wanting to leave Mongolia.

The highlights of the gobi trip: ice gorge where it is hot outside but stays frozen most of the year, flaming cliffs are beautiful but not very high... i was surprised, ruins of one of the monasteries from way back when, sand dunes, camel ride, and maybe a couple other things. We eventually headed to Arvaikheer, where I was going to separate from this tourist group. I showed my new friends around my town, said hi to my work people and a couple friends, and had my group over for some tea before they headed on their journey. I think it was interesting for them to see a ger of an American living in Mongolia. It was a big compliment when the driver said he needs to go to America for 2 years so he can learn the language and the culture as I have Mongolian language and culture. I said goodbye and started on my next adventure.

3. Meditation Retreat

That night I took a car into UB. The next morning I met up with the people who were in charge of the Vipassana meditation retreat that I had signed up for. The head people had really good English and put me in a car headed out to where the retreat was to be held. I got there and was pretty quiet, just observing my surroundings.... not to mention I was absolutely exhausted. Many of the people had no idea that I speak Mongolian and could understand everything they said. It was funny. They thought I had already begun my 10 days of silence. I was sitting in the ger while everyone was getting situated when someone called me outside. It was really funny how worried they were about me staying in a ger... even when I explained that I live in a ger. To my surprise, there were 3 Americans there. I didn't realize it at first, but they were the one facilitating the seminar. Turns out, they were peace corps volunteers in Napal a long time ago, and they have studied Vipassana meditation in India with Goenka (the real teacher of this retreat). The majority of the instruction and talking of this retreat were from tapes that Goenka taped at a seminar in CA. He spoke in English and a Mongolian translation followed, so I had no problem following along. The next 10 days were the most challenging and most interesting 10 days.... possibly of my life. I encourage whoever is interested to try it out. You can find more information at www.dhamma.org there are these seminar in countries all over the world, including 2 Vipassana centers in CA. I plan on doing another seminar one day, and may even challenge myself to do a 30 day seminar. It is very difficult for me to explain what this seminar was like. It was intense. We meditated about 10 hours a day. When you are trying so hard to concentrate for so long... it is inevitable that your mind will wander. Even though I was trying to keep my mind from wandering, it was very interesting to watch all the random places that the mind wanders to without you even noticing. Vipassana also concentrates on the body and feeling sensations. This was also extremely interesting... observing your body in a way you never have before. At the beginning of the retreat, I wasn't so sure that I really believed or agreed with some of the things they talked about... but as I continued, I started to see for myself what they meant and now I find it entirely possible. I have noticed a small change in myself since this seminar, something I didn't expect. I don't really want to explain it but I do hope this change stays with me. I do plan on continueing to meditate, though I will admit, I have only meditated 1 time since the closing of the seminar. Not talking was really easy for me... definitely easier for me than some of the people around me. There were times when we would talk a little about how our meditating was going with the teachers... sometimes I didn't want to talk but I did anyway. A few words doesn't disturb the silence. At first I would come up with questions that I had and I would try to hold them in until the end, but then there came a point where I felt the need to ask immediately and I would go through all the questions that I had. This would prove good for me because it would help me let go of the idea so I could focus better on my meditating. At the end, there was a time where the silence was broken, but we were still meditating. As soon as we could, the people around me wanted to chit chat. It was really wierd for me. My senses had become so heightened that the sound of people's voices hurt my ears. I walked from the meditation ger to our housing ger and it was really funny. One girl standing in the middle opened her arms and said "hello". I said "hello". She then giggled and said "english finished". I smiled and proceeded to tell her in Mongolian that it is ok because I speak Mongolian. From this point on the room murmered with small conversations about how the American speaks Mongolian. It turns out the person sleeping next to me has family in LA and I plan on calling them when I get back to America as I head down the road of "operation make Mongolian friends". The people at the retreat were very diverse; men and women of all ages from 15 to 92. Meditating can be rough on the body at he beginning and I really admire the older men and women who persisted through. There might have been a couple people who went home early but I really don't know... I wasn't concentrating on that. After the retreat, I thought of the one person I think would really benefit from this the most is my mom. We'll see if I can convince her to give it a shot. The truth is that I could think of a long list of people who should try it out. If nothing else, its definitely an experience.

At the end of the retreat, I sat talking to one of the Americans for a little while. Turns out he was headed for harhorin and I arranged to have him in contact with a friend who might be able to help him see the wild horses...

4. Harhorin and Israelis

After the retreat I decided to pass through Harhorin on my way home. I have been to Harhorin a few times but still hadn't seen the famous monastery, Irden Zuu. Harhorin is the ancient capital of Mongolia, has the most preserved of the ancient monasteries, and is the home of one of my good friends. It also happens to be in my province and on my way back to Arvaikheer.

In the guesthouse, I was in the kitchen making tea when an Israeli noticed my belt and asked me where I got it. I had totally forgotten what I was wearing and had to look down before I knew what he was talking about. Turns out, I was wearing an Israeli army belt, given to me by a friend that I met in 2002. We started talking and he had just arrived to Mongolia. He had no plans, so I offered for him to come with me to Harhorin and Arvaikheer. He thought about it for a while and by the end of the night decided to join me. I also told him that I was headed out to get a tattoo and after showing his worry about getting a tattoo in Mongolia and my explaining that the guy is clean, he started to seriously think about getting his nose pierced. In the end, he and 2 other people came with me. (i'll post pictures in the next post...) My tattoo is on the back of my neck and says "ikh Mongol" meaning "great Mongolia". I'm a little sad that I can't see it, but I was trying to be a litte more discreat this time. That night, I took a few people from the guesthouse out with me to meet up with the group that I had travelled with and a few of my other Mongolian and American friends. It was a good time.

The next day, me and my new friend headed to Harhorin. It was funny watching him react to all the small things that I don't notice anymore... like packing people into a microbus, the openness of the countryside, the question of where to pee, etc... I took pictures of him drinking milk tea and standing with mongolian countryside in the distance for his photo record. We got to Harhorin and met up with my friend. Her ger was the first ger he had gone to and my ger was the second. We walked around the town and he saw how difficult it can be to find things... usually when you really want them. The following day, my American friend from the meditation retreat joined us and we all went to the Monastery. We couldn't get a car to Arvaikheer that night, so we stayed an extra day. This was good for us for two reasons; its cheaper to take the post car and it turned out we got our own private concert of Mongolian instruments and throat singing in my friend's ger. It was a really neat experience. Harhorin is a really beautiful town surrounded on one side by huge mountains and on the other side by absolutely nothing. The Monastery, the mountains, and the concert provided for lots of great pictures and some really good experiences for our friends new to Mongolia.

My Israeli friend ended up staying with me for almost a week combined. In this time, I realized how much I miss Israel and how bad I want to speak hebrew.

5. What's next???

I also learned that I have been put on the waitlist for the CSULB graduate program. I really don't think I'm going to get in. This has caused my mind to swirl with thoughts and ideas of what I want to do instead. I don't know if I want to stay in the US if I don't get into school. There are soooo many options of what I can do instead. I have thought about Israel, Latin America, and more of Asia. I have thought about going back to community college and learning a new discipline or getting a job somewhere and just working and going to the beach. I really have NO CLUE what I will do. Right now it is all up in the air. For some reason America intimidates me. I don't feel like I am ready to return to the American lifestyle. I know that returning will most likely be a lot easier than it seems right now. It will be really nice to see my friends and family and to speak fluently everywhere I go. It wil be nice to go to the BEACH!!!!!!!!!!! Man I can't wait to surf! There are tons of things I'd love to do in and outside of the US... which will come first... I just don't know yet. I have learned new skills to learning languages and have compiled a small list of languages I want to know: Spanish, Hebrew, and Arabic. I want to begin with Spanish and Hebrew because I have a basic knowledge of both sitting somewhere in my brain (though I can not access it at the moment). Once I know these, I will move on to Arabic. I feel like the options are endless!!!

Arkhangai

5-11-2009

Traveling in this country is always an adventure. You can never know what to expect. A friend who lives in Arkangai came to visit my town and I decided to head back with her. We planned to take the post office car to a town called harhorin (the ancient capital of Mongolia) and then I would catch a ride, either on the bus or in a car, to Arkhangai. I had heard from many people that Arkhangai is beautiful and probably one of the more beautiful provinces of Mongolia, so I really wanted to see it before I leave. The day before we were supposed to leave, we got word of bad weather and wind storms coming the following day. All the schools were cancelled and the post office car decided not to leave that day. All buses and cars were not leaving the aimag that day, so we decided we’d wait a day and go when we could. The next day was absolutely beautiful and the wind storms never came…. So, we boarded the bus headed for Ulaanbaatar when we could and planned to get off at Sansar, the lunch stop. From there, we would (hopefully) catch the bus that is coming from Ulaanbaatar headed for Arkhangai. To our surprise, the bus stopped somewhere just short of where we wanted to get off. The way that traveling goes in Mongolia and knowing limited language; this would have been kind of nerve wracking if I were riding by myself. My friend and I prepared ourselves to be riding all the way to UB, just in case something went wrong. As usual, everything was fine and we got off the bus at Sansar. We sat in a guanz (small Mongolian restaurant) for about an hour and waited for the Arkhangai bus to come. The one thing about this trip is if the buses had passed each other, we would have been stuck at this lunch stop. We probably could find a ride from there, but it wouldn’t be very fun. Usually when I am at this lunch stop, there are many buses and cars stopped and many people around. Being there when nobody was around felt like the beginning of a horror movie; two female travelers waiting for a bus at a deserted rest stop in the middle of nowhere. We were sitting and talking, keeping our eyes out for our bus when a women came up to us asking where we were going. We told her and she told us that the bus was here, but it was parked on the other end of the strip of guanzes. We got up and headed for where she said, to our surprise to find the bus rolling up at exactly that moment, headed straight for us. We found the bus driver and asked for a ride. He tried to overcharge my friend a little bit who was headed for a town very close to where we were, and after a little arguing, he gave in. It is moments like this that I am glad I know Mongolian. Right as we were finishing up our discussion with the driver, a man walked up and asked in perfect English if we needed some help. We said no thank you, but proceeded to talk to this man. It doesn’t seem very often that we meet an older man who knows English, and especially not fluently. Turns out he studied in Russia for a while and then came back to Mongolia. After everyone finished up their lunch, we all boarded the bus, which surprisingly wasn’t full. My friend got off in harhorin and I proceeded to Arkhangai.

Arkhangai is absolutely beautiful! There are huge rock mountains, tons of trees and rolling (soon to be) green hills. The weather was great and everything was really beginning to take on the lush green color of the Mongolian summer. My town will not get so green because we are on the edge of the desert and don’t have much grass. There is a small stream of water coming from the freshly melting mountain snow running through the middle of the town. I now know of two parks in Mongolia; one in Darkhan, and one in Tsetsterleg (the province center of Arkhangai). The one in Arkhangai has way more trees. In Tsetserleg, I met up with a friend, dropped off my stuff and took a little walk around the town. I walked to the big Buddha on the hill and checked out what kinds of stores they have in town. We had dinner at the western style restaurant; a place I would eat 3 more times before I left Arkhangai. During the summer Arkhangai gets a lot of tourism and is equipped with large stores and lots of western things like tuna, American face washes and lotions, and an expensive guesthouse with western food. The following day, I got a ride out to my friend’s soum (a small village). I’ll explain how you get rides in Mongolia: you go to where the cars and drivers hang out, find a car going to where you want to go, give them your phone number and tell them where you live, and ask an approximate time. This time is never correct and you can expect to wait up to 3 or 5 hours for a driver. They will leave when their car is full and they are ready. To my surprise, the driver said he’d come at 3 and he came at 3:30. amazing! I headed to my friend’s soum and asked him what I should tell the driver if he doesn’t know where he lives. He told me, “that won’t be a problem”. He was correct. We stopped on the way to help a guy who’d crashed his motorcycle. He was slightly hurt and his bike wasn’t working so well, so one of the people in the car took his bike and he got in the car. Turns out, we were just over the hill from our destination. We dropped the biker off and proceeded to another hashaa, where we the women next to me told me is where my friend lived. This village is so small, they have 3 small stores, everyone knows everyone, and of course; everyone knows where the American lives. In this town, my friend and I walked around and hung out with some cows when walking to the rock formations that are at a distance from the village. It was beautiful and green everywhere. It felt like the longer I was in Arkhangai, the more green it got. After some time in this village, I headed back to the province center, met up with another friend and headed out to his village. His town was set up a lot different than the previous and had a certain quaint vibe to it. It was surrounded by large mountains, creating a beautiful skyline at sunset. The following day was a full day of traveling for me. I got a ride back to the city center, and from there found a car that would take me to harhorin (which is in Uvurkhungai). To my absolute surprise, this driver was ready to leave even before I was ready. Usually when a driver says he is leaving ‘now’, this means he is leaving ‘now’ when his car is full. I was eating lunch when he called me and asked to wait just a minute. When I walked back to my friend’s apartment to get my things, he was already there, waiting with a full car. This is unheard of! I put my things in the car and got in, observing the back of the truck piled with sheep skins and a wolf skin on the top (probably for good luck). Turns out, I was with a family who was really nice. We were caravanning with one other car carrying only a few people. We made a stop at a stream to help a man with his car and continued on. When you are getting off before the final destination of the car, many drivers will drop you off at the edge of town but this driver asked me where I wanted to get dropped off. I had him drop me off at the market, where I met a friend and found a car headed for my town that evening. Maybe two hours later, I was in a car headed home. With the amount of traveling I did on this trip, it was amazing how lucky I got with timely (and sober) drivers, not too packed cars, and really nice people wanting to help me out. I have never experienced such timely drivers in my town… maybe it’s from the tourism.

4-30-2009

It is crazy to think about how quickly my time here in Mongolia is coming to an end. I’m not going to lie, I did think about staying an extra year. Now that I have officially decided to head to the states, there are three topics that enter the mind:

What do you want to do before you leave?

How do you feel about your time here?

What do you want to do when you get back to America?

These are 3 huge questions with very intricate answers.

What do you want to do before you leave?

Outside of my work, I have decided to make more of an effort to see more of the country. I got on a bus headed for the western aimags and found myself 43 hours later in Hovd. At the beginning of the bus ride, I didn’t lead people on to the fact that I speak Mongolian, but it ended up coming out anyway. They all think it’s cute. There is an interesting dynamic when you are stuffed into a small bus for the long-hall. Whether you speak or not, there are interactions between each person… sometimes going undetected. The women next to me found a nice pillow on my shoulder and I found a nice pillow against the window. The first night, I was pretty dang cold, but the second night was not bad at all. I slept the majority of the way and got really tired of countryside people who aren’t used to seeing foreigners ignoring me or having trouble understanding me. Sometimes, it feels like people just don’t try. The first leg of the trip went through my aimag and was the same scenery I’ve seen a million times. The next was through Bayankhongor, which is pretty brown with a few mountains. The 3 part is through Gov Altai, which is basically when I came too and was really beginning to appreciate the scenery. The snow-capped Altai mountains were absolutely beautiful. The last part of the trip is through Hovd, headed for the aimag center. I got there pretty early in the morning, met up with a friend, and went back to sleep. I spent a couple days in Hovd, somewhat recovering from the long trip and relaxing. Hovd is absolutely beautiful and it was funny how happy it made me to see things like the melting river turning into moving water, huge and real mountains (as opposed to the hills we have in my town), and trees (even if they didn’t have leaves on them. Also, the west has a lot more diversity than my town, in their Mongolians and their foreigners. I went through a time last year where I literally craved any amount of diversity in my life. Had I been out west, this may have been different.

From Hovd, I gathered a few friends and we all headed out to Bayan-Ulgii. This is the furthest western province in Mongolia. Due to the Kazakh presence, it almost feels like another country. The city reminds me somewhat of the Middle East, the way it is set up with the stone walls and street alleys. In the stores, some people wanted to speak Kazakh instead of Mongolian, and I once again felt slightly intimidated when walking in to grab something. Some of the store owners were happy to see that me and my friends spoke Mongolian and were willing to converse with us in Mongolian. During the summer, Bayan-Ulgii gets a lot of tourists coming through to see the famous Eagle Hunters and Kazakh embroidery. I think the store owners were surprised to find a group of five foreigners; 2 of which speak Kazakh and the rest who speak Mongolian. In our time in Bayan-Ulgii, we walked around the city, threw around a football with a bunch of people in the market, walked on the river (it was still frozen), checked out the museum and bought cool Kazakh embroidered bags and purses. It is really interesting to see the mix of cultures out there; it is like nothing else in Mongolia.

After Bayan-Ulgii, we headed back to Hovd. I hung around for a couple days, and then got on the bus to head back to my town. I decided to make a quick stop in Bayankhongor to see the town and a friend before going back to Uvurkhungai. Though shorter, the bus ride from Hovd to Bayankhongor was much worse than the previous trip. I was on the “hot seat” on the bus. This means I was sitting on top of the engine or the radiator (or something), causing me to extremely hot and uncomfortable the entire ride. Me and two boys shared the hot seat, and switched it up who sat at the hottest part, but for the most part the entire ride was awful. I was dropped off on the edge of Bayankhongor and called my friend to figure out where I was. Bayankhongor is a town similar to my town, but with a little bit less infrastructure. Their claims to fame are really nice benches and trash cans, a western style restaurant, and a Dinosaur Park. Apparently, there used to be tons of Dinosaur bones but people have since picked them all up. I spent two nights in Bayankhongor before heading back home. The final leg of my ride was pretty short and rather nice, since I got a ride with a family in a Land Rover. Once back in my town it was nice to home, in my ger. I realized that I really like lighting fires and that I wanted to spend a lot of time with my Mongolian Family before I leave.

I forgot to write about the World Music Festival. I mentioned it, but didn't mention the most important part! There was this Israeli band called Esta. And the drummer did something I have never seen before and it was absolutely AMAZING!

Have you ever seen someone rock the shofar? I mean seriously!? I'm not talking like at the end of yom kippur, I'm talking like really use it like a real instrument! It was awsome! And another guy can rip on anything that requires lungs. They were very talented, but the Shofar was unbelievable!

check them out: www.estamusic.com

really! you gotta see this! They travel all over the U.S. and the world! I sure hope to catch them again!

I got back from Thailand the day before my birthday. I spent my birthday relaxing at the guesthouse, watching movies. I only left to go out, eat dinner, and by a little beer.

When I returned to Site, it was time to not do a whole lot because everyone was preparing for Tsagaan Sar. A pretty intense Mongolian holiday. Since I wrote all about the rites and rituals of Tsagaan Sar last year... I'm not going to right now. (it's still there, go read it) This Tsagaan Sar was very different for me because I am now living with a Mongolian family. I got to see a different side of the holiday. I spent Bituun (the night before) and the following day with my family, going to many homes for buuz, mongol beer, salads, airag, and milk tea. The next two days, I went to a couple houses, but I lost my phone and after that my Tsagaan Sar was a little slow. I wasn't too disappointed. Tsagaan Sar is supposed to last 3 days but in actuality, it lasts as long as it wants to. I think it's really... until the food is gone. I didn't have a phone for a little over a week and I actually really enjoyed it. There were certain times when it would have been a nice convenience, but all in all, it was liberating. Some people are still celebrating Tsagaan Sar...

This brings me almost up-to-date. I am currently waiting on one last letter of recommendation (hhmmmm... if you're reading this) and I am ready to submit my application to a graduate social work program at CSULB. So, if I get in.. the plan is to move back to Long Beach and do that. I'm also going to work towards my Child Welfare and Attendance credential, so I can one day be a School Social Worker. The truth is, I don't know exactly how "soon" that will be, but it's a good job that I know I could do... once I"m ready to settle down a little. The problem is that Peace Corps has opened my eyes to a lot more things that I want to learn and get involved in: child labor, human rights, science of some sort, human trafficking, community development, international relations, etc... etc... etc...

I 'might' be taking a little trip to Hovd and Ulgii, and then to Hovsgol... i'll let you know how they go.

possibly more reflections at another time...

peace, love, strength, understanding, and stay positive. these are the important things in life.

So, it's been a while...

I haven't written in a few months. I place complete blame on the fact that my computer cord is broken. I do all my 'blog writing' at home, but without a computer, cannot. So, what have I been up to? I'll take you month by month:

January- I found out in the beginning of January that I would be going to Thailand for a little while. Only 5 days(ish) later, I was on a plane to Bangkok. When talking about Bangkok, where to begin is a constant dilemma for me. I'll just give an overview. I got there not really knowing anything about Bangkok, or Thailand. My hotel was in a very central area, so on the first day/night I simply walked around. I ended meeting a lot of people and learning a little about the city and where I was. My hotel was right next to "lil Arabia", across the street from "sleezy street" and down the way from big fancy malls (these are my own nicknames). I met Saudis in McDonalds and some women in the 'big fancy mall' area... now known to me as the central point for the skytrain (cuz i forget the real name). Anyway, the women that I met were selling jewelry made by women who had been helped out of being trafficked and out of prostiution. Though illegal, prostitution is rampant in Thailand, as most people are well aware. They informed me a little about the city, and of course, my first question was.. "how do I get to the beach?" I wrote down a few places that they'd suggested in and around the city, thinking I'd only be there about a week. The next day, I began my self-guided tours of the city. Bangkok is HUGE and there's sooo much to cover! It was wonderful to be in a place where you really can get by without knowing a single word of the language. People were really helpful, and I wasn't afraid to ask. I felt pretty safe in the city and didn't get nervous walking around at night. Forms of transportation in Bangkok are: taxi, tuk tuk, bus, sky train, river boat, canal boat, and i think there's a subway, though I never saw or used it. Anyway, of course, I headed straight for the river boat. It's crazy how much you miss water when you are sooo far removed from it.

A few days after my arrival in Bangkok, I learned that I'd be there a little longer than intended. To no surprise I'm sure, I B-lined for the Beach. I had met a Peace Corps Kirgestan (sp?) volunteer in the PC office and we headed out together, antsy like two children waiting in line for the bathroom.

Most of the busride, I stared out the window, knowing I wasn't going to be doing a lot of traveling in this trip to Thailand. I watched the scenery and the people go by and stared at everything green (another thing we lack out here). I find that I have completely know sense of direction but I can almost always point in the general direction of the beach, and I ALWAYS know when I'm real close. The girl I was with kept saying she thought we were close and maybe we should get off, I sat tight and simply stated, "i'm not getting off this bus until I see the ocean". As the ocean became visible, I felt all the troubles of work and travel and everything else slightly lift. It's like they were there, but I had MUCH MORE important things on my mind: 1. Get me off this bus 2. where do I get in 3. are we going to make the last farry?It didn't take long to learn that we had to wait to see if there were going to be enough people for the final farry of the day. I'll tell you what, I was determined to get myself on that Island. I realized I hadn't brought sunglasses to Thailand with me and purchase a huge sunhat instead. We waited, and I starred out into the ocean, my eye on the island in front of us. Just as the sun was getting ready to set, we paid extra money to take a farry across (i didn't mind).

We found a place to stay and kinda parted ways for the next few days, though running into each other for some dinner here and there.

For me, the next few days were absolutely glorious. In Mongolia, I was kinda having a tough time and on my way to using my "mental health" days to take a little breather. The ocean does WONDERS for the mental health! There are very few things sooo physically different from January in the "lower-hungai" (where i live) and the beautiful white sands beaches, warm "cold season" sun, of Koh Samed. I spent the days laying by the beach, eating delicious fruit, swimming, a Thai massage on the beach at sunset, and simply enjoying the free feelings of warmth and no obligations to anyone. I met some people but preferred my time to myself. I was unbelievably sad when my available beach time came to an end and it was time to head back to the BIG city.I got back and spent the next days running around seeing all the cool sites and monastery's... and of course, riding the river boat wherever I could. The Monastery's were amazing, but after a while they all start to look similar. And I secretly get pissed off when they charge so much for foreigners and nothing for Thai people. I'd be happy to leave a donation for the benefit of your monastery, but since you already forced it out of me, I'm just gonna walk around and people watch til I'm over it and feel like leaving.I ended up staying in Bangkok for just short of a month and after running around when I first got there, I had time to relax and just enjoy the city afterwards. The rest of my trip was filled with discovering all the different sides of a city of contradictions... and good food! It is interesting how in one city you can have the very poor and the rich Thai people, destinct arabic and african areas, the european expat bars, the sleezy areas, rampant with sex trade and unfortunate females. A place where you can see people selling themselves, either by choice or not, and across the street is full birka-clad women following the men in a train. As referred by the women I met the first night, I headed to a place called Kousan Road. This ended up being a place that I frequented a few times a week.... and especially on Shabbat! That's right... I SAW JEWISH PEOPLE! haha. I was walking along Kousan watching the hippie paradise going on around me and trying to figure out what gave it that certain vibe... when, to my surprise, I saw a sign in hebrew, "bait chabad" it said. We have chabad house throughout America, but I was not exactly to find it in Bangkok... little did I know they are all over the world! Not knowing really what it was, I walked up and started asking questions. It was funny, the guard was very suspicious of me and it took me a while to convince him that I'm Jewish. Due to my Mongolian learning process, I find that I no longer know any Spanish or Hebrew and honestly could not even put together a sentence in Hebrew. By the end of my trip, it started coming back to me.

Shabbat in Thailand:I returned to the Chabad house for my first legit shabbat in a LONG TIME. I honestly didn't know what to expect, but somebody had told me to come for shabbat, so I did. I arrived and the place was empty. I found some stairs towards the back. I walked up, into a post-prayers room of eating and talking Jews. It was amazing! There must have been about 400 people there! I sat down in a free seat and had already gotten used to explaining to people, "I don't speak hebrew" ( i need to learn!). It was funny because when people found out that I don't speak hebrew, they immediately assumed that I don't know anything about Judaism, including the American I met. Most of the people were Israeli, with a few other foreigners. After dinner and singing (the same songs we sing at home), I met up with some people I had met earlier in the week and we joined the group for Oneg Shabbat. There was UNLIMITED amounts of food. It was such and interesting feeling to be back in a room full of Israelis. Keep in mind, I was in Israel right before I came to Mongolia. For Oneg Shabbat, we sat and talked and ate for a little while, and then the rabbis started asking people to stand and introduce themself and tell a story, or sing a song. Everyone was speaking in Hebrew, when he looked at me and asked me to speak. My friend told him to wait ask someone else to go, while he explained to me what was going on (something I'm WAY used to). After, I understood that the Rabbi was just asking me to say something, and some of the things others had said, I informed my friend to tell the Rabbi that I wanted to share a story. I can teach any lesson without feeling any amount of nerves, but for some reason, in this situation, as I do when called upon in a class, I get really nearvous. Despite this, I stood up and apologized that I don't know Hebrew and would be speaking in English. Of course, everyone in the room knew English, and were just happy that I was going to share. I introduced myself, explained that I live in Mongolia and celebrate/acknowledge each Jewish holiday on my own. A room full of travellers who make sure to spend every shabbat with either resting, or with Jews, were absolutely shocked. I could hear people saying things about how horrible that was. I continued to describe a tiny bit about life in Mongolia and began telling them the story of when I first discovered this Chabad House: After convincing the guard that I am infact Jewish, and showing him my passport, per his request..... as if there's JEW stamped across the top, I proceeded through the kosher restaurant, immediately engulfed in smells and sounds of Israel. I walked up the stairs towards the back and observed the people around me; reading, chatting, drinking tea, on the internet, sleeping, and calling Israel. I was completely mesmorized by all the hebrew and shocked at how this whole exprience was effecting me. At first, I didn't even want to talk to anyone. I walked towards the back where there is a small synagogue/ study room. I looked at the tallitot strewn about the chairs, books on the tables after an obvious study session, and I peered inside the modest ark with a single Torah resting inside. I sat down in the back of the room, continued to the listen to the bustling hebrew outside the door, and to my absolute surprise... my eyes started to water. I was that moved by the whole scene, how much I've missed the Jewish community, and the fact that I found this in place where I wasn't expecting. Coming to Thailand, I knew there were more likely to be Jewish people in Thailand than Mongolia, but I didn't expect to just run into them.

After sharing this story at Oneg Shabbat, a lot of people approached me telling me what the thought. Some were inspired, others felt bad for me, others were mad at the guard for making me convince him I am Jewish, some had questions about Mongolia or were planning trip to Mongolia, and others simply wanted to speak English. Turned out there was one other person who didn't know hebrew, one canadian, and on American who had made Aliyah. For maybe 5ish hours people sat around, telling stories, talking (and translating), eating, and singing songs. There came a point where I knew that if I was going to come back the next day, I would have to go to bed. Unfortunately, I could not completely keep Shabbat, due to my hotel being far away from this place. I returned the next day in time for lunch, singing, conversation, and prayer. By then, I was familiar with a lot of people from the previous night. After Shabbat, a group of us headed to a World Music Festival that was going on in Bangkok. The following two nights were filled with good company, wonderful music, and good food. I even ate crocodile ribs! And it was delicious.I can't possibly write about everything I did in Thailand, but let's just say... it was awsome! I really hope to go back one day and see more of the country. While I was there, I met some of the Peace Corps volunteers in the office and learned a little bit of another side of Thailand. I never really considered myself the "lone traveller", but I learned in Thailand that I love it! I met people everywhere I went, and I think that you see things in a different way when you are just wandering around by yourself. Though, there were a few Peace Corps friends who passed through Bangkok while I was there and some people I met in the Airport in Korea on my way back from the states were also there. Some of the coincidences and ways I have met people in the past 2 years is a little bit crazy... just the world working in mysterious ways...

My new tattoo. Don't worry, it was completely clean and safe. The guy did tattoos in New York for 3 years and has an American license. This was taken right after...

I am writing this letter to those people who I feel have sincerely expressed interest in coming to Mongolia to visit. Some have asked me when would be the best time and I have been very vague. The best thing I can say is to come when time permits you. Things in Mongolia aren’t really planned in advance, so I hope to travel around Mongolia after I COS (close of service) but this can not be guaranteed. If anyone is interested in this possibility, let me know. I am now beginning my second year in Mongolia and we are well into fall. Winter will begin around Novemberish and continue through the end of February. March, April, and May are spring, which means wind and dust storms. As for holidays, there is tsagaan sar in February and Naadam in July. It really depends on what type of experience you are looking for. Summer is obviously the best time for travel, but it is still possible to travel other parts of the year. As for my work, I technically work all year, but there are slower parts in January/February and in the summer. I have 20-something vacation days left and can take vacation if needed. If you truly intend on coming, now is the time to starting thinking about it. Also, keep in mind that even if I have to work, I can still send you in the proper directions for cool adventures. Any questions? Let me know!

Love,

Robin

8.22.08

It’s crazy the transformations that we see in Mongolia. Nature has such a presence in Mongolia, even in the Capital. It has been rainy every other day for a few days now and it is absolutely beautiful. With each rain, you can physically see the difference in the land. It is as if you can watch the grass drinking the rain. The day before yesterday was a rainy day, and I was slightly annoyed because the streets in the city turn to rivers, cars splash on you, and I had found myself caught in the rain wearing sandals. (though I have since debated which is better for a rainy day, my running shoes or sandals) My friend and I were taking the bus out to where she lives, in Ulaanbataar, but a little further away from the city center. We were hurrying through the rain and puddles when I hear, “oh my G-d, look at the sky!!” in almost an alarming voice. I quickly stop, first look at my friend, and when my brain registers what she said, I look up, only to see the MOST MAGNIFICANT RAINBOW I HAVE EVER SEEN. I thought I had seen beautiful rainbows, (usually in Mongolia) but all other rainbows do not even compare to the site of that day. The colors were so distinct and bright. It was as full as a rainbow can be. Complete with the second rainbow right below it. We stood in the street marveling over the beauty in the sky, referring it to “complete ROYGBV” or “like a skittles commercial” and wishing we had a camera. It took a minute to realize we were close to her house and HAD to go quickly to get her camera, as who knows if we will ever see something so fabulous. We tried to hurry to her house, but had serious problems getting our eyes off the sky. People all around us were taking pictures. When we finally got to her place, we ran up, put our stuff down, explained to my friend’s husband that he MUST come outside, and ran down, camera in hand. By the time we got back, it wasn’t quite as bright as before, but the second rainbow had changed and it seemed to be reflecting the main rainbow, with the colors going in the opposite direction.

Today, I was in a car driving from Darkhan to UB. It’s a four hour drive, so I brought my book. There I was reading about the torturing of Tibetan prisoners, when I looked up, only to notice the amazing scenery. The lush green grass, soaking up the rain and getting greener with ever drop, the clouds shades of blue, purple, grey, and white; the sun creating amazing shades of pink and purple in the sky; The clouds blocking some of the sun’s rays, so it shown so bright and clear on one side of a hill but with hidden on the other side, only creating a bright green opening in the middle of gloomy rain cloud shadows. It was a scene that even the best artist could not come up with on his own; a picture that can only be painted by nature.

8.31.08

Yesterday, I was walking to my friend’s house and stopped in my tracks, just to look up at the sky. The entire horizon was like one giant rainbow, starting with shades of red right about the mountains (more like big hills) and continuing with each color of the rainbow fading into the next as you looked higher into the sky. And on my way home, I couldn’t help but stare at the stars, causing me to walk crooked and slow, but totally worth it.

The Mongolian sky is absolutely amazing!

5-7-08

Spring has been quite an interesting and introspective experience. First of all, the parallels between life and death have been astonishing. Something I never expected. One night, after I sat in a car for 3 hours waiting to leave, I was in a car headed to visit my friend in hujurt (a soum, smaller town, near me). The sun set beautifully over the mountains as we finally left my town. Sitting in the front seat I could see where the headlights hit the “road” and it felt as if I was watching the green grass grow. Winter in Mongolia has left the land brown and dry, but spring has provided warm enough weather for a little rain and to allow the snow to melt, allowing the grass to begin to grow. Soon the country will be the beautiful green Mongolia that I arrived to. For the first time in my life I have been able to witness the metamorphous of seasons. People always say California doesn’t have seasons. I never really knew what they meant by this until now. Even through fall and winter, I just chocked it up to ‘our seasons are just REALLY short’. But as spring transforms this country and people begin to spend time outside, I have ditched my long johns, and there is even beginning to be more meat in the market, I feel summer on its way.

7-27-08

It has been a LONG time since I have written and so much has happened! The above writing is something that I began to write about spring, but never really finished. I have decided to still include it on my blog because it is something that I thought a lot about. At the time, I was completely amazed at the effects of spring and the transformation of the country. It is now well into summer and I am up in Selenge aimag where the land is beautiful and green. A lot has been going on since the last time I wrote. I will begin with America:

At first, I was pretty nervous about going to America. I thought it was going to be really awkward and I was not sure how it would feel to be there. I was also nervous about being gone from my site for so long. As time passed and I came closer to my departure, I started to get excited. Everyone kept asking me what I was going to do (and eat) in America and people in America wanted to make plans. I decided that the best idea would be to go to America with no definite plans, so I could feel things out and decide what to do from there. I was unsure about how I would react to being back in America. My excitement was in full gear by the time I boarded that plane to china. The travel was not bad at all and all my flights were on time. It was interesting to think that the new group of volunteers was on their way to Mongolia at the same time I was leaving. I sat on that plane and watched as I departed Mongolia, and I realized that I definitely was not ready to go home for good. I was happy to go to America, but I was sure that my time here in Mongolia was not yet finished. This is reassuring, seeing that I have another year left in my service. When I think back, I remember standing in the customs lines in San Francisco, and hearing English all around me. At that moment, I knew that things were going to feel a little funny in America. It’s weird, but sometimes I find a comfort in not understanding the languages around me. It gives me a lot of time to just observe and be in my own head. Those who sit and try to understand the conversations around them are the ones who really do well at learning the language. I however, find myself zoning out and just thinking. Hearing and understanding everything around me for the first time in a long time was a little overwhelming for about a minute and then it was kind of nice, but I found myself listening to other people’s conversations, simply because I could. The flight from San Francisco to Los Angeles was really short and my flight was actually a little early. My mom, my brother, and some close friends met me at the airport and we went for my first “American” meal. The ultimate question… “What’s the first thing you ate?” IN-N-OUT OF COURSE!!! It was delicious and nice to sit and chat with some of my favorite people. From that moment on, it was surprisingly easy to sit and talk with all my friends and family. There was a lot to catch up on, but also as if no time had gone by. I often express how lucky I am to have people who I am so close to. Before I left Mongolia, I had told my mom not to go grocery shopping until I got there. Knowing my mother, she would have wanted to go out and buy all sorts of things that she thought I would want, but the truth was, I wasn’t sure what I would want to eat. Also, I just wanted to go to the grocery store. She took me to Whole Foods (I think), and it was a very interesting experience. I told her I needed to just walk around and look at everything. I did just that. There was sooooo much stuff, and after spending more time than necessary, I ended up walking out with a couple bags of granola, whole grain bread, and two different types of cheese. The thing that I ate the most while in America was vegetable sandwiches with cheese, on some kind of oat bread. Enough about the food. Other things that I thoroughly enjoyed: the freedom of driving (something I never miss), the beach, the sun, and the Jacuzzi. Going to the beach was like a spiritual experience, every time. I may go many places in my life, but I (may) never leave the southern California beach. My surfing skill has severely suffered by my lack of nutrition and inability to work out in the winter. Usually, when I don’t surf for a long time and then I go surfing, I get really frustrated knowing that I should be doing better. However, this time was different. This time, I absolutely sucked at surfing, but I didn’t mind. I was just happy I was out there. Unfortunately, my surfboards need some repairing, and I was nervous to use them too much because I do not want them to get water logged. It was funny seeing how happy it made my mom to see my surfboards crammed in her tiny apartment. If you can’t live by the beach, you might as well bring part of the beach to you. There is something about the beach and reminders of the beach that create a calming and relaxed atmosphere. When I am in Mongolia, I long to go to the beach, but I find comfort knowing it will be there when I get back. When I went surfing, I spent time just wandering around the beach, watching the interactions between different people. My favorite interactions to observe are those between surfers. It sounds cliché, but surfing puts you in this “relaxed, open-minded, one love” mindset. There is something that you can only gain through surfing and the feeling of riding that wave. It’s something that all surfers know, but can’t really be put into words to be expressed to those who have never been. In the surfing community, everyone knows, there is much more to surfing than the thrill of the sport. There is certain spirituality to surfing that connects you to the ocean, to nature, and to the world as a whole. After you have experienced this connection, every trip to the beach is a totally different experience. You will never see the ocean the same. I could write forever about how much I love the ocean, the beach, surfing, and the surf community, but I’m pretty sure that most of the people reading this will not completely understand, or just need to go out and feel it for themselves. We can chock it up to “hippie thoughts” and move forward. Instead, I will move forward to some of the interesting experiences of America. It was a lot of fun to be “vacationing” at home. I was able to be in Southern California and not have to worry about a job, or any type of obligations. I was purely there to enjoy. To enjoy time with friends and family, to enjoy the familiarity of (most) everything, to enjoy being there for significant life moments (like Lindsay’s wedding and finding out Jess is pregnant, Taryn’s birthday, Aunt Annette in CA, Wail’s birthday, etc…), to enjoy seeing how things have changed, and to experience a different perspective of “home”. There are quite a few experiences that stick out in my mind. Like, when I went to the ‘Israeli fair’ (now called something else). It was right after I got to California, and my first time in over a year, to be around lots of Jewish people. I was still in ‘Mongolia mode’ and as I walked around and looked at all the booths, all I could think about was possible projects and ideas for projects in Mongolia. I was happy to learn of Jewish organizations devoting themselves to helping other people. I used to feel like Jewish organizations were always devoted to ‘tikkun olam’ (helping the world), but it never felt like they were interested in helping the non-Jewish world. This perspective was changed in my trip to America, where I was happy to learn about Jewish people performing tikkun olam outside of the Jewish community. I understand the idea of helping your own, but I do not think it is good to limit yourself to this. I believe in helping those who need/want it. It was hilarious to see people who did not expect to see me or people’s expressions when they heard that I live in Mongolia, or that I’m in the Peace Corps. At the Israeli fair, it was nice to hear Hebrew all around me and to sit down and eat falafel (though it was not the best falafel). My connections to Judaism, Jews, the Jewish community, Hebrew, and Israel is something that sometimes makes complete sense to me and other times is something I just don’t understand. But it is fact; it will ALWAYS be a part of me. And I have realized, being so far away from it all, that it is a part of me wherever I go and I sometimes miss having access to indulge that part of me. While on the topic of ‘Jewish stuff’, I should mention my visit to synagogue. Before I left Mongolia, I had it in my mind that I would try to go to synagogue a few times while in America. This did not happen, and I ended up going only once. I’ll admit; I skipped services to go surfing… both a spiritual experience, just in a different way. I tried explaining to my mom that going surfing was like going to services, but she wasn’t having it. That’s ok, it’s something that makes sense to me, and that’s all that matters. This is the beauty of spirituality. I was glad I went on the specific day that I did because it was a girl’s bat mitzvah. Where at one point, I knew everyone at temple and knew when and who was having their bar/bat mitzvah, this time I had never seen her or her family before. The odd thing is; I was still just as happy to be there for it. I feel being there, watching this girl read from the Torah for her first time, seeing the looks on the faces of her, her family, and her teachers, was a beautiful thing. I tend to go back and forth with my connections to the synagogue, but on that day, I was happy to be there, sitting in the front with my mom while the rabbi and this young girl conducted the service. I’m sure that after so many years of being a rabbi at this synagogue, the rituals become second nature, but for me, someone who has been removed from this community for some time, I remembered the connection and why it all meant so much to me. That is who I am, and it always will be. Judaism is definitely more than just a religion.

While in America, I made sure to go to a few places that I love. I jumped at the opportunity to go camping at San Onofre, spent time at Newport Beach, in Long Beach, on the Santa Monica pier, and made sure to make my way to Venice. These are the places that are “home” to me. Irvine, though I lived there for so long, does not feel ‘homey’. It does not have the relaxed, open atmosphere. In Irvine, it is weird to see someone walking down the street, unless of course, it is a group of two or three women, getting their daily exercise at 6am before they wake the kids up for school. I was able to see one of my best friends in, what will be her home; a place suitable for her and her husband to have their first child. It’s an amazing thing, to see how life progresses. Though I feel so far away from that life, I am so happy for those who are entering that stage. My friends and I had a poolside bbq before I left and it was so much fun to spend the day playing with their kids in the pool.

Many people asked me what I would be doing after the Peace Corps. To me, this is a funny question. I feel that I am so caught up in what I am doing, that I really have not begun to think about what I will do afterward. I first need to take this for what it is and see how it affects me. I have a lot of life ahead of me (I hope), and I don’t plan on planning any of it out. I feel that there is no point in making any long-term plan because I know that I would never feel obligated to stick to this plan. I have some friends who are facing the question, “what do I want to do with my life?” This is not a question that I feel I need to ask myself. And when other people ask me, I have a very simple answer, “I’m doing it”. I want to live and to experience life. I want to do the Peace Corps… (I’m doing it). I do not feel the need to plan further because I do not know what I will want to do after this. But I do assure one thing, I will find something else that I want to do. Whether it be a beach bum, a student, a traveler, a volunteer, a tax agent, or even a waitress; I will find something, and then I will do it until I find something else. Sitting on the beach in Santa Monica, in between halves of the Lakers loosing the Championship, I had some of my favorite conversations of my trip to America. In a conversation about life, one of my good friends asked me “if someone knows they have the ability to cure cancer, are they obligated to? Or is it ‘ok’ for them to become a bar tender”. (Obviously this is a figurative question) This is a good question, but I feel that the answer is easy. If someone knows they have the ability to cure cancer, they will (most likely) not be satisfied with themselves unless they do it. Then they can be a bar tender. If someone knows they have the ability to cure cancer, but they are perfectly happy and satisfied with their life being a bar tender, then there is no reason for them to feel obligated to cure cancer. (But if they do feel obligated, then obviously they are not satisfied.)

I was in America for about 3 weeks. I had a complete BLAST being there. But around the end of the second week, things in America did begin to feel a little weird. I was enjoying myself, but I was ready to come back to Mongolia. I spent lots of time with close family and friends, ate vegetables, and just kind of waited until it was time to leave again. I was not sad to leave my friends and family, I knew that I would be back. It was hard to explain to people that I was ready to leave again, and I didn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. The fact is, Mongolia is where I’m supposed to be right now. I am in the middle of something that I have EVERY intention of finishing. It was easy for me to slide right in and easy for me to slide back out. Through some airport trouble, I got really frustrated thinking I wasn’t going to be able to leave that day. I was ready. The flights back to Mongolia were just as easy as the flights to America. I met some people in the Korean airport and ended up running into them in UB later that week. Upon my Mongolia arrival, everyone wanted to know what I did in America, what I ate, how it felt to be there, if it was hard to come back, and what I brought back. I developed simple answers to these questions, as I was still processing everything: I went to the beach, surfing, dancing, more beach; ate lost of veggies and Mexican food; it was FUN; it was easy to come back; and all I brought back was nuts, granola, and dried fruit…. Oh yeah, AND GIRL SCOUT COOKIES. When it came to figuring out what to bring back to Mongolia, I didn’t really want to think about it. I ended up just grabbing a couple things from my mom’s cupboard and sticking it in my bag. Looking back, I forgot to get things for some of the Mongolians that I wanted to bring things back for…. Oops.

After a few days in The ‘big’ City, I headed up to Darkhan, a fairly large city in Mongolia where I am now living while I train the new volunteers. It is exciting to meet the new volunteers because they are going to be around for the next year, and the other group just left. Some people have asked why I decided to apply to do training, and my answer is simple: I believe in the cause. Coming to Mongolia is an interesting experience, and in those first 3 months, while living with host families are pretty intense, but there is a lot to be learned before you get to site. The things that I teach in my lessons will help the trainees when they get to site. Knowing as much as possible about Mongolian culture, working in Mongolia and (for my position) the situation of children and child-service providers in Mongolia will help them to adjust and integrate when they first get to site, as it did for me. The group that came here 1 year before I did just left last weekend. I went into the capital to hang out and see them off. I have long said that Peace Corps is like a social experiment, and I feel the experiment keeps on going. It is weird how we become so close to people and then they are just gone, a whole group of them. I truly value many of my relationships I have made out here. Some of the people I have met are really amazing people and are going to do great things in life. Others are people that I feel I have learned from, simply by our interactions… whatever they may be. I am interested to hear about their reactions to moving back to “the land of the plentiful”, as America is often referred to. (Along with the mother land, home, the other side, and real life) It’s interesting how in a moment, your support network out here changes. Something else that strikes me is that some of the people that I have met out here are the future politicians, diplomats, and decision makers of the world. Some will move on to hold certain political offices (maybe even president), others will become permanent ex-pats. Where do I fall in this group? I think, neither. That’s all I know for now. It will be interesting to have friends all over the country, and all over the world. I do know one thing; I hope to continue my travels for the rest of my life. And I hope that one day I can spread the knowledge that I am gaining to others.

I sit here on my window ledge while it rains profusely outside, pleased by the absence of the recent heat and the fresh moist air. This morning I said to my roommate “in California, we call this winter”. A nice rain storm is so refreshing in the middle of the scorching summer. And with the rain, the land gets greener. I look forward to my Tuesday ride to Sukhbaatar, where I see the difference in the color of the land, simply produced by one rainy day. Tomorrow will probably be hot again. My favorite thing about the ride to “the Sukh”, other than the beautiful hills, lush grass, and trees, are the herds of camels. We don’t see lots of camels where I live, and DEFINITELY don’t see so much greenery. Where I live is on the edge of the Gobi desert, and still has the dryness of the desert. During the summer there are green things, but it not like here (up north) where the plants rise out of the ground and turner greener with every rain. Ah… beautiful Mongolia is back. When I first got here, I was constantly amazed with the Mongolian sky. This is still my favorite thing about Mongolia. It’s not just the stars and lack of light pollution, it’s the intensity of the deep blue sky with distinct white clouds, as if in a painting. Today, the clouds are covering the sky and they are a little bit of a grayish color, but there are still bright white clouds to be seen. It is obvious to me why Mongolians have worshiped the sky for so many years and why mountains are so highly respected.

That is it for now, but I say one thing to my readers. I welcome questions and comments, if they are insightful, educated, or not meant to be a nuisance.

Here are some quotes that were in an e-mail that was sent to me. I picked out the ones that caught my eye. I don’t necessarily agree with all of them… but they got me thinking. Some of them made me think of certain people, so I have included their names in parentheses so they will take a look. Enjoy!

Will Rogers:Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit." - Aristotle

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined."- Henry David Thoreau

(amy)

"Shun idleness. It is a rust that attaches itself to the most brilliant of metals." - Voltaire

(steven)

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."- Lao Tzu(Amy)

"The indispensable first step to getting the things you want out of life is this: decide what you want." - Ben Stein

(Amy)

You cannot depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.Mark Twain

And some humor:Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

4-6-08

“Have you seen the herd of yaks hangin out in the river?”

This is a quote from myself, as a part of normal conversation with one of the other volunteers in my town. ‘The River’ is a place in our town that looks like maybe at one time it had water in it, but my guess is that it’s been a while. I love seeing herds of animals in my town. Right now we have a herd of goats and sheep, a herd of cows, and our newest addition, a herd of yaks. Maybe it is the fact that I had never even thought about yaks before I came to Mongolia, but I find myself loving yaks. They are such awesome animals. I was walking to my friends house, past the grazing yaks, when I decided to try and answer my own question about the kosherness of yaks. I walked up to the yaks, trying to look at their hooves, but also keeping my distance, as my knowledge of yaks’ temperament is minimal. It looked to me like they have a split hoof, but it was hard to tell. As I continued my walk, I simply contemplated the fact that I just walked up to a yak and that I was passing yaks as a normal part of my life. Every time I think like this, I can not help but smile. J

I used my friend’s washing machine today for my laundry. It has been around 10 months since I’ve really used a washing machine for a full load of laundry. I have been washing my clothes by hand since I got to Mongolia, which is actually surprisingly harsh on clothes. Washing machines here are different than in the states. They are not hooked up to water and require a little bit more work than what we are used to. But using this washing machine is MUCH easier than washing by hand. I find myself actually enjoying the extra physical work certain tasks take here. There is something more satisfying about working hard. I love to have a hard day’s work. This can be anything from busy at my job to washing clothes and my apartment. I love that feeling at the end of the day when your body is tired because you have worked it throughout the day. Right now, I lie here in my bed, my body is tired from doing laundry, cleaning my home, and the workout I did in my extra room and my hands are dry and tired from wringing my clothes and washing them. I think, in America, we get too used to things being easy and convenient. There is so much more satisfaction in something that you have really worked hard for. Part of the challenge of Peace Corps is adapting to another way of life. You begin to do things differently, and I wonder if these things will stay with me throughout my life. In America, my cooking consisted of whatever was quick, where here; I enjoy a night of chopping vegetables, and making soup over the course of an hour or more. In America, doing laundry was annoying, though so easy, where here; I actually enjoy the feeling of doing my laundry. It is more difficult, but also satisfying, and actually a good time to think. In America, “I need to wash my hair” is the typical joke of an excuse to skip out on a date, where here; it is a valid chore that needs to be done. Here, I will tell someone I am cleaning on Saturday and what this means is that I am going to clean my home, and then I am going to take a tub bath. I know that I definitely hold a warm shower in a special place in my heart, along with the availability of a variety of fruit and vegetables, but I also know that these are luxuries that I can live with out. It will be interesting to see the little ways that my life is changed after living here. The things that I miss about America have nothing to do with most conveniences that we have in America, and more to do with certain atmospheres. Only time will tell what I will miss about Mongolia. (and I still have another year to enjoy it, before I start missing it)

mmm.... yak’s milk

My counterpart just brought us yak’s milk/yogurt. It is soooo good. I think this means the beginning to delicious dairy products again. Hurray! Spring is here!

Better yet, it’s almost summer!!! (kinda)

Here’s a question for the rabbis....

Is milk from a non-kosher animal also non-kosher?

Are yaks kosher?

Eight steps to enlightenment

‘Awakening the Buddha Within’

Tibetan wisdom for the western world

By: Lama Surya Das

The following is a series of quotes taken from the above book. Some are by the author and some are by other people. I tried to remember to write down when it was by somebody else, but I know I forgot a lot. You’ll just have to go read the book! Seriously, I recommend this book to anyone and everyone! It is one that I plan to read over and over again. For now, enjoy the quotes. I do not necessarily agree with all of them, they are just things that caught my eye and made me think.

Spiritual energy is healing energy; when any group gathers with a dedication to something greater than one’s finite, individual self, the accumulated energy is almost palpable. Sangha

The spiritual life is the search for answers. Who am I, why am I?

“to be enlightened is to be one with all things”

“we are all lit up from within as if from a sacred source”

It’s a fact: you are not going to find truth outside yourself….. The only place you are going to be able to find truth is in your genuine spiritual center” Truth is found by living truly- in your own authentic way.

When you genuinely become you, a Buddha realizes buddhahood

You become a Buddha by actualizing your own original innate nature. This nature is primordially pure. This is your true nature, your natural mind.

Buddhism says yes, change is possible. It tells us that not matter what our background, each of us is the creator of his or her own destiny.

How does the Buddha feel? Completely comfortable, at peace, and at ease in every situation and every circumstance with a sense of true inner freedom, independent of both outer circumstances and internal emotions.

What we seek, we already are. Everything is available in the natural state.

Often raising the right questions- your own head, deep-down, burning questions- may actually be more important than having the right answer, should there ever be one.

Dzogchen- The natural great perfection, “one instant of total awareness is one instant of perfect freedom and enlightenment”

Leave everything as it is and rest your weary mind, there is a nirvanic peace in things left just as they are.

Don’t follow past thoughts, don’t anticipate the future, and don’t follow illusory thoughts that arise in the present; but turning within, observe your own true nature and maintain awareness of your natural mind, just as it is, beyond the conceptual limitations of past, present, and future”

The inner truth, the inner teacher, the absolute guru- not just to know and experience reality with the rational, logical computer brain, but to know with the intuitive heart. That’s something you can really rely on: finding truth within your won experience

Let go, open your heart, unfold your spiritual sails, open your angelic wings, and soar on the wind. Enjoy the infinite.

How wonderful! How wonderful! All things are perfect exactly as they are!

“As long as you stay unconscious, asleep at the switch of your own life, true happiness will prove elusive”

“Wisdom is self-knowledge: wisdom is truth manifested as clarity of vision. Wisdom sees that light and dark are inseparable and that shadows are also light”

“Buddha said- we should all keep the reality of death in the forefront of our consciousness so we can better prioritize our daily activities and thus better direct our attention to that which is most significant and meaningful”

“each of us becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, the proverbial accident waiting to happen”

The thought manifests as the word;

The word manifests as the deed;

The deed develops into habit;

And habit hardens into character;

So watch the thought and its ways with care,

And let it spring from love

Born out of concern for all beings…

As the shadow follows the body,

As we think, so we become

-from the Dhammapada

“wisdom tells me I am nothing, love tells me I am everything. Between the two, my life flows”

“if it feels like love, but it’s not wise, its not love”

Love everyone, even if you don’t like them.

“truths are many, but truth is one”

“when you accept yourself, the whole word accepts you”

“everything is empty, like a dream. But it’s not like an empty room; it’s a sparkling sunlit day, and the sun is filling all the spaces”

“Enjoy this natural great perfection, things just as they are”

“something made greater by ourselves and in turn that makes us greater” –Maya Angelou (about work)

“the value of anything is always the value we vest in it”

“I firmly believe that your true vocation of calling is knowing yourself and being yourself”

“awakening to this present instant, we realize the infinite is in the finite of each instant” –Zen master

“forever is composed of nows” –Emily Dickinson

We all have all kinds of thoughts, but that does not mean we are defined by them.

Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it.

Do not believe in traditions because they have been handed down for many generations.

Do not believe in anything because it is spoken and rumored by many.

Do not believe in anything simply because it is found written in religious books.

Do not believe in anything merely on the authority of your teachers and elders.

But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason, and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.

-The Buddha

Rely not on the teacher [person], but on the teaching.

Rely not on the words of the teaching, but on the spirit of the words.

Rely not on theory, but on experience.

-Buddha

We live in illusion,

And the appearance of things

There is a reality.

We are that reality.

When you understand this

You see that you are nothing.

And being nothing,

You are everything.

That is all.

-Kalu Rinpoche

2.18.08

I have thought before about the effects of weather on people, and today this was brought to my mind, as I noticed the significantly warmer air, the sun out, and a women standing outside praying. I have seen women throwing milk on the ground and praying before, but while watching this women, I realized I hadn’t seen this since fall. As I walked through the still Tsagaan Sar deserted market yesterday, I notice that though many of the shops were still closed, there were more young people hanging out in the market. It is the change in weather lately that brings people back out of their houses and gers to enjoy the feeling of the sun and their hands and ears not freezing. I was walking to work, when I first noticed this praying women and as I proceeded across the street, I continued to notice the changes in the physical conditions outside and in the change in the atmosphere. Today is an abnormally warm day, compared to the past few months, and I am pretty sure it will be very cold once again. So, in the midst of the knowledge this warmth is not going to stick around, I take my time on my walk to work. I notice the ice that has been on the road since the first snow is slowly turning to slush, the people walking around town are walking slower, and are more lively. It is possible that it is just my own change in energy due to this warmer weather, but I think it has affected everyone around me. I continue to work contemplating the effects of weather, referring to past thoughts of the effects of weather on crime in the United States, something I have always silently wondered about, but really don’t know the answer to. As I always do, I walk in the street in the best position for absorbing the sun’s warmth, I finally cross and my thoughts are interrupted by “meow…meow…meow”. I turned looking for what could be only the 3rd cat that I know of in my town. I didn’t see anything and was about to continue my walk when I heard it again. This time I look up in the direction of the sound, only to find a furry and dirty orange, white, and brown cat sitting on the tree branch. I look up at him wondering if he is stuck or just enjoying the weather, as I am. I stand there watching the cat as he stands up, looks down, turns around, turns back, sits down and meows again. I want to help him, but there is really nothing I can do. I look around to see if anyone has noticed this cat stuck in a tree, thinking to myself, ‘this is something you only see in story books. At this point in the story, the firemen would come with their big ladder” but I am not in a story book, there are no firemen and no one around seems to care that this cat is stuck. I look to my right to find two men fiddling with their motorcycles, and to my left, I am surprised to see a couple goats walking. Whenever I see animals walking through the town, I can’t help but let out a gentle laugh at the difference between here and “home”. Of course I keep watching the goats, only to realize there are not just a few, just as I turned to finish my walk to work, I notice more goats coming around the corner. I smile to myself and stand there watching as about fifty goats and sheep cross my path with their herder walking behind them with a small whip in his right hand. After they pass, I take one more look at the cat, and continue my walk, smiling inside at the random things that happen on a daily basis. It is not normal for a herd of goats to walk through this part of the town, at the same time it is not that unordinary. There are times when I am crossing the street, where we recently got a traffic light, (we now have 2 in our town) only to find a few cows in the center divider. Sometimes I forget that I live in the countryside, then these moments bring me back. Things here became normal really quickly, but it will be interesting to see what I think when I go back to concrete California.

about the deel picture.... the 'pocket' is the part above the boos (the green thing) and you stick things in from the side. people hide EVERYTHING in there! cameras, phones, gifts, bottles of vodka, etc...

2-11-08

I have officially completed my first Tsagaan Sar. I found that right before certain situations, I got slightly nervous that I’d do something wrong. I have heard that Tsagaan Sar will still continue until all the buuz are gone, but the official holiday is over. On Thursday, I was at my home, not doing much, when I got the text that read “The Catholics want to know if any of us want to go to the hudoo with them to celebrate bituun.” Sounds funny, I know. Let me explain. ‘The Catholics’ are a small group of people, possibly the only other foreigners living in my town. They are all a little older and are Catholic Priests and Sisters. They are incredibly nice and amazing people. If I recall correctly, 2 are from Italy, 1 from Argentina, and 1 from Mozambique (possibly spelled wrong). I have used the word ‘Hudoo’ in a few blogs, but for those who forget or don’t read regularly, it is the Mongolian word for countryside that has made it’s way into my normal vocabulary. Even in English. Finally, Bituun is the day before Tsagaan Sar begins that is kept for family time. It is not usual to invite a bunch of foreigners for Bituun, but I jumped on the invitation, eager to learn and experience something new. I got ready to go to the hudoo, slightly worried that I would be really cold because it was my first time wearing my new deel (Mongolian traditional clothing). I made sure to stop to get something for the family before all the stores closed. Finally, I put on my deel and walked to my friend’s house. We met up with Catholics, this time consisting of just 2 of them, and loaded ourselves into the car, ready equipped with our amazing, Peace Corps issued Alaskan sleeping bags. (I love that thing so much, I’m like a walking advertisement) The car load was a Priest, a Sister, and 4 Peace Corps volunteers, two of which were slightly ill. (sounds like the beginning of a joke) We started twisting through the Arvaikheer roads only stopping at a house to pick up a TV wrapped in Animal skin and fur (finally I get a small hint of what people do with it. I always see them sold at the market). At this point, one of my fellow Peace Corps who is visiting from The City (Ulanabataar) feels privileged to have already experienced more Hudoo than in the year and half he has lived in Mongolia. Living in Ulaanbataar is very different from living anywhere else in Mongolia. It’s like comparing living in Los Angeles to living somewhere up north, where there’s cows and stuff, maybe Humboldt… I don’t know, never been there). Anyway, after picking up the TV, we proceed to the road towards UB. At some point we veer off the road and start following the path ‘clearly marked’ by previous tires (towards zoonbayanulaan). I admire G (the Priest) for driving in Mongolia, I know I couldn’t do it! We drive for a while on a bumpy road made mostly of rock, surrouded by the beautiful country and snow covered mountains (or large hills), while G tells us how he met this hudoo family. He was driving with some of the sisters and saw a man on a motorcycle stuck in the mud. They helped him out and have been friends since. The family brought him a few gifts and calls him every so often, always asking when he will come visit. The family wasn’t doing so well for a little while, the Sisters gave them a cow, they made money from that and now they seem to be doing pretty well. While listening to this story and other chit chat in the car, I can’t help but realize that we haven’t been on any kind of path for a while and we have turned around a few times. G tells us that we are looking for a man on a motorcycle who is supposed to come meet us and guide us to where we are going. We keep our eyes peeled but don’t see anything, but animals (cows, horses, yaks, goats, etc) and mountains. Nobody has cell phone service, so we can’t call. G heads in the general direction that he thinks it is (directed from the family’s summer home). Finally, we see two men with motorcycles, one can’t get his started. G asks them in his admirable Mongolian and finds out where we are supposed to go. We drive up to an area with 4 gers and a bunch of animal pens and meet the family who we will be staying with. G goes with another man to help the guy on the motorcycle and we sit in the ger struggling with our bad Mongolian. A little while later, G returns and we begin the Bituun rituals. Learning time. G explains to us that the reason everyone stays with their families on this night is because it is the last night of the year, there is no moon, and there is negative energy that is being pushed out, so the year will begin on a fresh and postitive start. (my version of it) We begin folding the blue scarves (same one as when I first arrived) in thirds and greet everyone in the ger in the traditional way. This is with two arms out, blue scarf in hands. The older person puts their hands on top of the younger persons, you lean forward and sniff or kiss the cheek of the other person while saying a Mongolian greeting for Bituun. Little did I know that there would be A LOT of this over the next few days. Then we sit down, the men pull out their snuff bottles and pass them around, while the woman of the ger begins with the ritualistic serving. First, the plate of rice is passed around (everyone takes a pinch), then the flour mixed with some other grain and a little sugar, next is the plate of .. (I never remember what it is called, but it is made from the stuff that gathers on the top of milk when it has been sitting), followed by a bowl of candy, and a plate of aruul (milk curd, which I really didn’t like at first, but now I love it). These are the ‘white foods’ and it is white foods month. Also, included in that mix is su te tse (milk tea, which I also didn’t really like at first, but love now) and a plate of meat with a little bit of fat. Next comes the salads, buuz, and airag. We were told that after we have eaten buuz good, we will go greet the people in the other gers, but he failed to mention that each ger would bring over a plate stacked with buuz. The first of everything is always put on a plate and added to the Buddha shrine on the North side of the ger. This family was very kind with teaching us some of the traditions that we didn’t aleady know. After to were stuffed to the brim, we sat and passed around a small amount of Mongol airag. I found it funny, when the Priest sitting to my left mentioned that to me that Vodka would help with the digestion. He is right, but I don’t know many Priests and wasn’t expecting it. After a while of sitting we stepped outside and walked to the ger two gers over. We walked in, only to find a goat hangin out in the ping (the part before the door, used to freeze food, and hold firewood). We entered the ger and repeated all the same traditions, from greeting with the blue scarf to the passing of snuff, white foods, and mongol vodka. We sat and chatted for awhile, and found out there were 2 english speakers in the group. This family was soooo nice and inviting to us. I don’t remember if we ate more buuz there, but we probably did. Then we returned to the other ger to sit and pass airag. Each time we sat, the snuff bottles were passed. Just as our stomachs began to really digest the night, some of the people left the ger and we all set up to sleep. We rolled out our sleeping bags on the floor and slept. The ger was extremely warm and I was in my warm sleeping bag. I had trouble sleeping, nothing new. In the morning, we woke pretty early, and took our time getting ready to go to the other ger (this day was my birthday, for those of you wondering what I did for my birthday). On the first day of Tsagaan Sar, everyone greets each other at sunrise. We sat in the ger and waited for the sun to come over the mountains. Once the sun was in the right spot, we walked to the ger we had gone to the night before. We started with greeting each other with the blue scarves, sat and passed many snuff bottles, and white food plates, along with salads. The buuz came out, airag, mongol vodka, wine, and vodka were all passed around. This time we also had Mongol Beer, made of… I don’t know, but it has raisins floating at the top of it. The drinks that are served for Tsagaan Sar are the same as a wedding, but are different in the way they are drank. Tsagaan Sar is nice, it is much more relaxed. We talked to our new friends, took a TON of pictures, and sat for a while longer. We ate a ton of buuz, but this family had prepared 2000 buuz, so we really only made a crack. In the gers, wearing whatever layers we have put under our deels, including the burning fire, and the body heat, it would get soooo hot. So, at one point, I slipped outside to put one of my layers in the other ger. I walked to the ger, and there was a goat standing in front of the door. Now, I haven’t been around many goats in my lifetime, so for all I know they could be silently vicious animals, maybe a guard goat or something (it could happen). I stood there looking at him, inching my way closer to see how he’d react, when the door to the ger I’d come out of opened. It was one of the English speaking gers, she saw me and I asked if goats are mean. She didn’t quite understand so she came to me, saw the goat, took one step close to it and it ran away. He was cute though. She came in with me as I shed my layers and we again joined the group. Not much later, a goat came running into the ger, when he showed he didn’t want to leave, they decided to feed him some scraps they had been saving for the goats anyway. This family wanted us to stay longer, but The Catholics had another Tsagaan Sar obligation. They gave us Tsagaan Sar gifts of bread and aruul (because that’s the custom. The host gives the guest a gift as a thank you for coming)As we filed out of the ger to get our things, I watched the goats return to their pen in perfect line. It was amazing. We said goodbye and thank you after giving our gifts to the head of the family. We loaded ourselves in the car, and it was cute how everyone came outside to say goodbye, even to wave as we drove away. We were invited to come back during the summer, and I fully intend on going back. I’d also like to get this family like a football from America or something. I think they would enjoy it, and they were so incredibly kind and hospitable to us. This situation shows the general attitude of Mongolians.

Upon getting back to Arvaikheer, I am dropped off at my home, climb my stairs, my stomach feeling much better than the night before, and head straight for bed, I need a nap. I find myself referring to Tsagaan Sar as an eating marathon because these traditions that I have described are repeated at every house you go to. I guess, in a way, I am lucky that I don’t know too many people, I don’t know that my stomach can handle it.

I wake up just before it is time to start heading to another house for Tsagaan Sar. This is a little bit of a different experience because it is people that I know and one of them knows excellent English, but it is all the same foods and drinks. They are very nice, and we eat a ton…. Again. Once we are stuffed and have enjoyed each others company, we get ready to go.

After a little while at home, I head to an Americans house to hangout with our ‘city friend’ and he expresses how much he has enjoyed our Tsagaan Sar experience. I also have enjoyed this, but I am happy that I am in the Hudoo (which I’m not really, but compared to the city, I am) because I have more of an opportunity to experience the culture. I am shocked to find out that he has been living in Mongolia for a year and a half and has never been to a wedding, or even a Mongolian’s house. Life in the city is completely different than out here, and cultural immersion is much harder. Also, in The City, everyone seems to be trying to be Western. I did notice that many of the younger people wear deels and I think that this tendancy to stray from the cultural aspect of Mongolia is sad. This is an amazing country with amazing people, customs, and culture. I’ll admit, I get a little smile when I see young Mongolians with a deel and LA or Yankees New Era hat tilted to the side. This is the effects of MTV. (Not to mention that they probably don’t know who the Yankees are, or anything about baseball for that matter. Many will know Los Angeles, but not anything about it) It’s also funny to notice that it seems to be the cool thing to do to wear your boos (belt on a deel) low.

My second day of Tsagaan Sar was filled with three house visits, all consisting of the same rituals, with slight variances. My first house of the day was the home of my director. I got there, and I was the only one visiting at the time. She explained some of the Buddhist symbols to me, answering some of my questions, and then I sat down. It was funny because she seemed to be Americanizing everything for me. But I wasn’t sure if it was just because I was the only one visiting at the time. She poured me a glass of milk tea. While I was eating some salads and buuz, she poured a glass of airag, and I sipped it, getting ready to hand it back in the mongol tradition, when she placed another cup on the table in front of me, explaining it is Camel’s airag. And then a shot glass of strawberry vodka stuff. It looked like Margarita mix, but it was Vodka with a hint of fresh, yet sugary strawberry flavor. I did not expect it to be strong, but it was. It would be great as a Margarita for those who don’t like Tequila, but would need a little juice added. She asked me how to pronounce it, thinking her sister got it from America. I didn’t know. (how would you pronounce XUXU?) Later talking to a friend, combined with what my director said, I figured out that she had gotten it in Beijing, and it was pronounced Shushu. While I was visiting, a group of people I had never met entered the home, along with one of my coworkers. Every sat and began the Tsagaan Sar rituals. My director began preparing things in the kitchen and called me in, asking me to sit and offering me hot chocolate or coffee. I politely said no, and that I’d like to sit with the Mongolians. She liked this, but it was funny to her, and she felt the need to share it with everyone in the room. I didn’t mind. She followed it by telling them that if they speak slowly, I can understand. This lead to conversation and a great time for me to practice my Mongolian. After a while, they all left, and I stuck around a few minutes to tell my director, again, what I keep telling my coworkers. I really enjoy learning and being a part of Mongolian cultural activities. At this point, it was time for me to leave, I digested for about an hour before I had to go to my next house (my translator and friend). This was with all the Americans. It was all the same foods and rituals, beginning with entering a room of Mongolians that I have never met, pulling out my blue scarf and greeting everyone, beginning with the oldest. When it was time to leave this house, it was time to go to my 3rd and last of the day. This was a Mongolian friend that I have made. We again, did the same rituals; greeting, white foods, airag, plate of meat, vodka, wine, buuz, etc. This time we had a little scotch to go with the meal, and I tried Yak tongue. At first I was not much of a fan, then she brought out another plate that was warm, and I actually kind of liked it (that’s puts me at Yak heart and tongue, as the yak eating goes thus far). Kosher? I don’t know. They are almost like cows, so maybe they are a kosher animal, but it defiantly doesn’t have any of the other things making it kosher. After this house, I hung out with the Americans for a little while and went home. The 3rd day of Tsagaan Sar was not so Tsagaan Sar-esque. I didn’t visit any houses. I simply got ready for the next day (today). Today, I had Tsagaan Sar at work with my work people. We each brought food and we had all the same Tsagaan Sar foods, but less ritualistic. (no flour, or white food plates) I brought American food. When I took deviled eggs out of my bag, my director was a slightly skeptical, I could tell, “eed eed” I said as all the Mongolians say. Each person tried them, and they were the first thing gone from the table. They LOVED them. I was slightly worried because I don’t use much mayonnaise (which Mongolians love) and I add spices (salt, pepper, season salt and red pepper), but it went over well. The other thing that I brought was Peanut Butter cookies which everyone loved. Success. I don’t know what it is, but I get a little nervous before certain situations. This was one of them. I was nervous that they wouldn’t like the food, that I was expected to bring more than I did, and that my gift for the gift exchange wasn’t what was expected, and even that I would be the only one wearing a deel (weird, I know). But as usual, everything went well. They loved the food, the gift was appropriate, and everyone except my director was wearing a deel.

Now I am sitting at my home, writing about the past few days, not even sure what’s happening next. As far as I know, tomorrow is a work day, but I also know that I’m in Mongolia, so I should be ready for anything. Contrary to popular Peace Corps belief, I never once had to eat Sheep butt, the sheep butt sat on the table as part of the set up, next to the stack of bov (bread stuff) piled with candy and aruul. According to my fellow Peace Corps volunteers, Tsagaan Sar seems to go on for longer than the said 3 days, we’ll see what happens.

For now, Tsagaan Sar has become one of my favorite holidays, along with Passover (in Israel AND American), Thanksgiving, and Israel Independence day. I have enjoyed the holiday, but I am seriously ready to get back to work. Work has been very slow lately because EVERYONE was getting ready for Tsagaan Sar and had to prepare buuz and food. “how many buuz did you make?” is a common question this time of year. Also, Tsagaan Sar has given me extra motivation to practice my Mongolian!!!!

I hope this blog finds everyone in good health and high spirits. And I wish everyone health, happiness, luck, and success in the year to come. Going by the Chinese calendar this is the year of the earth rat and is said to result in good livestock and productivity.

Sakhan shinjeelare to all. (it means have a good new year)

I almost forgot to add one more thing:

As if Mongolian children are not cute enough! Mongolian children running around gather candy from whoever will give it to them wearing a deel to their feet is the most adorable thing ever. All little kids are adorable, but there’s something about puffy red cheeks and doing the Mongol kneel in a Mongol deel and even taking sips of a bowl of airag bigger than their face that will put a smile to anyone’s face. Next year I will be better prepared. There is a tradition for children to knock on doors and people give them candy and/or money. I was not ready for this. I got some kids knocking and I stepped outside and talked to them, not really sure everything they were saying, just figuring they were looking to visit someone for Tsagaan Sar, but got the wrong house. A few asked me if people were here, and I said no and they left. Then, on my way to my way to visit my director, I was leaving and some kids asked if they could come in, I said, no, I was on my way out. They looked a little mad. So, when I got to my director’s house, I asked about this. She told me that she gives them candy and a little bit of money. Now I will know for next year…

So, I asked my Host Agency and tried to make the arrangements to move to a ger. I found an awsome family and everything. Turns out, I am not going to be able to move into a ger :(

Why do I want to live in a ger?

-I love them.

-There's something very zen about living in a circle

-You can control the heat during the winter

-It is probably my only chance for that experience

-I love gers. did I say that yet?

-To live with a Mongolian family

-It would do wonders for my cultural immersion and language skills

-The Mongolian family I found is awsome

-the husband is a Lama, and I wanna pick his brain

-They have pet guard ducks

alright, well it's just too bad it won't happen. Oh well, my apartment is really nice.

Tsagaan Sar is begins this weekend. I am excited to wear my new deel (traditional clothing) and my Mongol boots.

So, this will be my first Tsagaan Sar, but this is what I know so far: (then I'll write after)

-we will eat lots of buuz (some of my favorite mongol food)

-we will eat a little bit of sheep butt

-we will drink vodka (funny that nobody has been able to buy vodka in Mongolia since New Years, but the week before Tsagaan Sar, the shops are stacked with vodka again. coincidence? I don't think so)

-We will go to many different people's houses and eat buuz

-the guys will compare how many buuz they can eat in one day

-we will drink hudoo (country) airag (hurray. i like that stuff. but the airag has been bad lately.. and i'm excited to have good airag)

-supposedly Tsagaan Sar is the end of winter, but many Americans don't believe this.

-Mongolians love to see the Americans in deels

-Mongolians will laugh at me because I am wearing my buus wrong

-Tsagaan Sar is the same as the chinese new year.... but don't tell Mongolians that

-According to the Americans... Tsagaan Sar is three days long, but celebrated for a little under a month

-I need to bring little gifts to people's houses, but Mongolian tradition focuses on giving the guests gifts

That's all I know for now, and it is all from word of mouth.

by the way... something exciting for me... after a few days of avoiding most websites... I will finally be able to watch the superbowl tomorrow!!!! HURRAY!!! The Ambassador taped it for us and we are all set up for a superbowl party!

What could be better? first the superbowl, then tsagaan sar, then work starts being busy again, then we have another training, and then it will be YAK FESTIVAL! I'm really looking forward to Yak Festival!