the count down to africa has begun! if you would like to hear from me sometime over the next 27 motns, please give my your mailing address :)

for anyone still out there who is interested, i got my peace corps placement.

i'm heading to benin west africa july 17

so it's been ages since i've posted anything on here. i check here often to see what the rest of you are up to, but for one reason or another i never update. well, i'm in need of some advice....

my uncle is dying. he was diagnosed with ALS last month. the average life expectancy of someone after diagnosis is 2-5 years.

i was suppose to leave for Africa in june, however, i've postponed it till either later in the summer or september because my family has decided to do a family vacation while my unlce is still well enough to have fun/particpate.

so my question is, am i doing the right thing by leaving at all for africa? I'm not exactly sure what i'd do with myself if i stayed, but by leaving i feel like i'm abandoing him and my entire family. i want to spend as much time with him while i can. however, i can't continue putting my life on hold.

i don't know what to do. any thoughts?

i'm going to sub-sahara africa! i leave in either may or june...that is if i can pass all the medical tests

today is the big day, my interview with the peace corps people. wish me luck

woohoo my interview for the peace corps is next wednesday!!!!

so i've hit a patch of bad luck...

got a D+ on my anatomy exam

got a speeding ticket

locked myself out of my car

had to pay 50$ to get back in my car

computed died

got a pinched nerve in my elbow

this has all happend in like a week :(

if i do end up having to get a new computer, i'm thinking about a lap top. any suggestions on what kind? i'm open

it's offical after months of talking about it, i finally recieved my final letter of recommendation for the peace corps and have submitted my application. wooohooo now it's just a matter of wait and see. it said someone would be in contact with me sometime during the next 3-4 weeks. everyone keep your fingers crossed.

more to come about my meeting with my father, still trying tofigure out how i fee.

i know it's been awhile and when i have a bit more time i'll sit down and really update. as it is i'm running really late.

i'm getting ready to head out the door for ohio so i can get messured for my bridesmaid dress. saturday i'm leaving for virgina to visit my father. i haven't seen him for 11 years and as it stands right now i run the risk of him not being there when i get there. life is full of risks i guess. now that it's time for me to leave i'm getting more and more nervous. 11 yrs is a long time, what will we say? what will we do? why am i doing this? i guess i'll be able to answer those questions later.

also, i just might be heading up east after seeing dad, so all of you prepare! it will all depend on how impulsive i'm feeling and how my car is holding up. did i mention i just shelled out almost 300$ to get the exhaust worked on it. grrr

cya when i get back

when did i become one of those girls that you see in movies and books who feel the need to solve or avoid their problems with booze and ice cream? here i sit, with a half a glass of wine and having just put the ice cream back in the freezer. i'm becoming one of those girls i use to make fun of :O

it's not that i have problems, well nothing major anyway. it's just that once again i let me family get to me. god it's so complicated that i don't even know where to begin or to even begin at all. i mean who really cares besides me? i guess it boils down to that i need to get out of here and move on and start my own life. part of me dreads doing it, but part of me can't wait.

this isn't making sence i'm sure. i'm rambling about things but not really what's going on in my head. my family makes me horrible they have too much power over me. the power to lift up and the power to crush. and it seems that too often they use it to crush me. it's always been like this, i'm overly sensitive i know to them. but always in the past i had someone to talk to about it, someone who understood me and them, but now with mom gone i'm finding myself so isolated. i love my family so much that at times i can't picture myself moving away from them, but other times, like today, i want to leave and never come back ever.

i don't know what else to say. there is more so much more floating in my head but i guess it will have to stay there for now.

i am turing into suzie homemaker, martha stewart and betty crocker. today, i made a chocolate cake from SCRATCH! as well as a double batch of chocolate chip/black walnut cookies and i'm going to be making a pasta salad either today or tomorrow. am i good or what, lol :)

also i got an A- on my second french exam. i can't really explain it. i guess i'm learning stuff but it doesn't really feel like it. i can't have a conversation with a french person yet, but perhaps by the end of the summer.

they came and took the ramp off my house today. has everything come full circle then, taking it off on the one year anniversary of her death?

it's been a year today.

a lifetime, yet insome ways just a moment

so last sunday was the retirment roast for ken. i went b/c well, i had no reason not to really. i would have been better off staying home. i was reminded in a huge way why i didn't associate with peace studies people very much while i was at mc. out of everyone who showed up, i only knew a handful, and of those handful they were the ones that i really didn't like while i was a student. it made me feel bad though, listening to all those people get up and talk about ken and the fun they had with him. i missed out on so much b/c i hated those around him and dind't want to spend time with them.

on a brighter note, i got an a- on my first french exam. extra credit saved my ass. :)

i came home today to find one of the trees infront of my house was hit by lightening. half of a tree is now laying in my front yard. also, one of my rain gutters came off my house.

in other news, spent the day with ryann at mc. it was good fun. i wish we lived closer. i went up and spent some time with ken while i waited for ryann, seems that he is to have hip replacement surgery next week.

it's offical, i am debt free. i just payed off my last student loan!

i'm freakn excited about this, but also a little nervous, in that this was a big chunck of change and i didn't have to pay it off now i could have waited. but by paying it off now i get out of all the interest that i'd have to pay by waiting.

parting with money always makes me nervous.

Your Political Profile:Overall: 20% Conservative, 80% LiberalSocial Issues: 25% Conservative, 75% LiberalPersonal Responsibility: 0% Conservative, 100% LiberalFiscal Issues: 50% Conservative, 50% LiberalEthics: 0% Conservative, 100% LiberalDefense and Crime: 25% Conservative, 75% LiberalHow Liberal Or Conservative Are You?

mormons came to my door and i didn't have enough time to hide. damn got their bible though, i'm starting to get a collection of religious works. as a religion student i of course have the bible, and now the book of mormons and i believe i also have a koran tucked away somewhere. i might just have to leave the two of them laying somewhere when the fam stops by. nothing like freaking out the bible thumpers.

i start my classes at IUSB tonight and I'm scared. i shouldn't be for crying out loud, i already have two degrees. but yet i am. tonight: French 101 from 6-9

for those of you interested i talked to yam today and found out that she was accepted as a fulbright scholar and is going to russia next year. i'm really excited for her. once she knows more about when she'll leave and where she's staying we might discuss my coming out to visit. i've always thought russia would be awsome to see, and what better time to go when someone you know is already there. of course if this happens i'll be as shocked as you, but stranger things have happend. and it is fun to dream.

okay, i do not get paid enough to move wet bags of mulch and soil in 42 degree weather.

on a brighter note, i finished my peace corps application finally. just waiting to hear back from those i asked to be references

now begins the wait

it's been awhile i know...

my life is so boring here lately that updating seems pointless. but i figured i best do so now when i'm thinking of it just so you all know i'm all and kicking.

it's been a pretty good week really. went up to IUSB (college where I'm taking some courses this summer) and bought my books and looked around the campus. my orientation isn't till after my first week of classes..how stupid is that!?! so i wanted to get a feel for it before it all started. my books cost 250, and that's just for two texts and a workbook. about had a heart attack right then and there. of course it's good preperation for grad school i figure.

monday went up to manchester to have lunch with ken. it was really nice just to sit and talk with him. he's a little freaked i think about retiring, but who can blame him. i would be scared too to leave a job i had had for 45 years.

tuesday went back to manchester to meet up with ryann and don. it's amazing how with some people it doesn't matter how much time passes between seeing each other, your able to pick right up where you left off. and that's how it felt tuesday. i miss having friends who live close by.

Congrats into getting into grad school Cube i'm really proud of you.

what happens when you get the life you worked for and wanted, only to find out that it's not what you wanted at all? is your life a failure then?

You're 65% Irish

You're very Irish, and most likely from Ireland.

(And if you're not, you should be!)How Irish Are You?