Last week I learned of Al Sharpton's and Robert Johnson's statement on the matter involving soon to be former House Majority Whip Congressman Clyburn in regards to his run for House Minority Whip. Sharpton stated,

"For there to be a debate, therefore, that Jim Clyburn, the majority whip who will be running for minority whip should not be given that position by the Democrats in Congress to me is offensive," … "Everyone around the country should call their congressman and say we want to make sure Jim Clyburn remains as whip of the Democrats as minority whip," Johnson added in a written statement, "To diminish his (Clyburn's) leadership role in Congress would run the risk of losing a significant part of the Black vote, a decision the Democratic Party cannot afford at this most critical time in history,".

Sharpton continued, "Black voters are the strongest voting bloc and have continuously shown their dedication to the Democratic Party. As a constituency, African-Americans are engaged in our country's political process now more than ever, and Congressman Clyburn is the voice and face that we need to lead the Democratic Party in Congress."

 Read more: http://www.thestate.com/2010/11/11/1555891/sharpton-clyburn-replacement-could.html#ixzz15SzlbuJi

 I wonder if Reverend Al Sharpton, Robert Johnson, and the Congressman have looked at the percentage of African American voters that voted in this year's most recent mid-term elections. 34% of African Americans voted in this year's mid-term election, about 4-5 percentage points lower than the national average. That number has been hovering around the African American community for a while. Some have regarded the turnout as apathetic. African Americans can be very influential in the voting process, but a sad truth is the community does not fully exercise that right to maneuver much on the national scene. With that, I respectfully disagree the Congressman's role could be charactized on behalf of African American voter participation.

 The reference to race, to incite a base that is not as active as it could be, along with drawing on faulty reasoning to support a presence in leadership roles, disappoints me. The Congressman feels his face represents a vital base of the Democratic Party—understood, but how far should one go with that ratio? Ranking members of the Democratic Party also have their qualms about Nancy Pelosi remaining as speaker. Should all women of the Democratic base too feel they're not being represented if she isn't reappointed to a leadership role? NO! Why? Because some feel that Nancy Pelosi's leadership was adequate for the first term, and perhaps not for a second. The same could be true of Clyburn, but that argument is not permitted a due process to be made. And never mind the fact that we have an African American President…needless to say, doesn't he too reflect an aspect of the base?

 It's my understanding, Congressman Clyburn is strategic, serves his district well (my representative is that guy that yelled at the President), and focuses on the issues and the community. Why wasn't that argument made for his continuing a leadership role? The Congressman and others drew that heavily-dreaded 'race' card to grapple onto power. And yes, I feel that is what this is about. The Congressman can't represent a base that is not fully there, or hasn't been there for years. Trends of African American participation are not striking in correlation to having a minority for a majority whip. If the Congressman was not re-elected into a leadership role, past voter participation among minorities would likely remain the same.

 What is the effect of all this? Dissent and what now appears to be a slightly uncertain Democratic party. The Congressman has been offered an assistant leadership role and has urged others to accept it. The Congressional Black Caucus has given him his support without fully understanding what his new role will be and have publicly stated they will not support Nancy Pelosi. That too is a mistake. Many accredited the Democratic Party's discipline to her leadership and Congressman Clyburn has stated himself this Congress has been the most productive since possibly the New Deal.

 When it's all said and done, the Democratic Party is now a minority in the House for a reason. And instead of focusing on being the 'representation of the base', the Party should aim to energize the base and remind them to why this is what we DID NOT want…Republicans to have control in some form because the entire Democratic base will soon enough be left behind. There is far too much out there for us to organize and unite around, and at the end of the day, most Democrats don't care about the face of their leadership. 2008 proved that. We do care about having a Party that will not mirror the Republican Party and forget about who 'we' the base really are: struggling, hard-working folks who can't seem to shake the true effects of the Republican-controlled era.

 

 

 

 

     

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It was not my intention to make this blog overly-political, but given the recent election results, I can't shy away from what I feel to be a threatening political environment coming in the not so far off future. So after 1 1/2 days of remaining in the fetal position and avoiding any form of media (I haven't watched television in weeks), I am ready to reflect on the mid-term elections. With all of that stated, here goes….

There is no way to miss the point of yesterday's midterm elections. People are deeply frustrated with how they are being governed. For the sake of this entry, we'll look past the 'why' with respect to the governance. The political debate is at an all-time partisan low and the public over the last couple of election cycles are calling for something, almost anything, to change that. We can certainly link elected officials' rhetoric as likely reasons as to why this has occurred, but one thing is for certain, the public does not want to spend the next two years talking about the last [2 years]. They want to see progress on the economy, job creation, the federal budget deficit, and immigration. Regardless of how people voted, these are the issues that voters want their representatives in Congress to address.

Each party is faced with an overarching voter mandate. Republicans will be expected to govern and get out of this stump of a 'party of no.' They must craft serious legislative proposals to match the serious problems our country faces today and in the future. Democrats will be expected to work with Republicans in search of meaningful compromises to ensure the economy remains away from oblivion and on a path to steady job-creation.

We have seen the President be willing to compromise and hold strong to reaching across the aisle, however he will likely have to abandon some of his ideas and explore new ones. Below are a few ideas that will need to be explored.

First, The President will be forced to revisit ineffective and failed tax cuts of the Bush administration. I am no fan of all the tax cuts, but if the President wants to lead in fiscal responsibility, he could steer Congress to give a look at the military budget. One of the reasons the Bush era of economic policies were so deplorable was because he supported all the tax cuts as well as nearly tripled the defense budget. If we can revisit that short-lived window of Clinton's economic success, perhaps the President could reel back some of the shortly-followed faulty economic logic that was in play until he took office.

Second, the President and Democrats must stand firm against the Republican pledge to repeal their singular achievement of the past two years—providing quality, affordable health care to everyone. Implementation must proceed not just for the fiscal gains to be had over the next several decades but also for the critical health and social benefits it will deliver to the vast majority of Americans as different aspects of the law come into force. The new law deserves the time needed to make it work.

Finally, the President must not be fearful to take a thoughtful, substantive approach on immigration. I say this because, recent actions have paired the President's handling of the matter identical to the way Republicans would tackle the matter if given the opportunity—that opportunity being of course, the White House. The President must learn from the past and finally be truthful with both governing parties and the public that law-enforcement is NEVER the only way to approach any issue, and certainly not an issue that is so heavily bogged down in economic ties.

In searching for optimism, I do believe all is not lost with this slight shift in our national government. With Republicans controlling the House, there is a real opportunity to construct reasonable foreign policy. But the President still controls the direction of this administration. He holds the last stroke with his pen to either VETO or sign. Given that, I'm sure Republicans will turn down the noise and get on with what people want to see happen. This means looking after the future of our country, not trying to tear down the president.

I'm optimistic this will happen because some of us are already eyeing 2012.

There has been much conversation about the immigration debate recently in light of the situation in Arizona, the first state to form legislation (SB 1070) criminalizing the violation of a status-only offense. However, there is much not mentioned when discussing immigration. With this blog, I will share what I feel to be an overlooked theme on immigration: worker's rights.

The Congressional calendar is quickly disappearing and we've yet to see a bill or comprehensive immigration legislation introduce in either chamber. Republicans fault the healthcare legislation for creating an extremely partisan atmosphere as part of the reason why, along with additional endless rhetoric about other issues. Democrats also continue with the same rhetoric-redirecting attention to the extreme opposition and lack of cooperation. All the while, when immigration matters are discussed, it almost always concentrates on forms of punishment for the undocumented instead of providing a path to citizenship, due process protections, and cultural integration.

Most people overlook the reasons people migrate in the first place nor tempt to consider what their aspirations were. They want what we all want--economic security. But there is a conglomerate of networks whose interests benefit from the current failed immigration system.

Perhaps the reason the immigration debate steers clear of more humane solutions is because if we legalized all 10.8 million undocumented individuals in this country, restored due process protections, and provided an attainable path to citizenship, then these newly-established American citizens would be entitled to worker's rights. If each one of us were to go out and ask every undocumented person why they've migrated to the United States, among other reasons, they would more than likely say to improve their living standards. Most immigrants migrate from countries that have policies that impede social or economic prosperity. We've seen that in Mexico with the North American free trade agreement-also known as NAFTA; European immigrants that migrated to the US in the early 1900s to the mid to late 1990s; and also with citizens of less developed countries in general.

The fact of the matter is corporations would no longer be able to fully expropriate the benefits of cheap labor. Currently immigrants who work, receive no benefits at all, no form of social security-thus indirectly thrusting them into an inestimable number of working years, and no leverage or influence on their jobs. Through years of organizing and pressure in the struggles for workers' rights, jobs were made secure. However this security is not available for non-US citizens. The Undocumented who remain so are not able to tap into the pros of organized labor, thus hampering what would be an uplifted status of all workers. It would not be in the best interest of most companies to employ newly-legalized working immigrants, even with the penalties and growing regulation, simply because it would significantly impact profit margins and bind them to a contract of obligations such as social security and newly-mandated health benefits. These reasons are why we've seen increased outsourcing and continued hiring of those willing to work for cheap labor.

How does all this trickle into policy? It's no secret companies have had their hands in our government for years, and in the past years or so, that has become more apparent. Undoubtedly one party tends to guard the interest of the free-market, but to be frank, there are those with that same interest on the other side of the isle. Organized labor has always been a starting point to hold those in power accountable, and with the right maneuvering, can and has been the start of very influential social restructuring. This same conglomerate has influenced our nation's foreign policy's focal point to be that of trade agreements and an increased private sector abroad, discounting that these agreements create huge economic gaps and poverty, thus causing people to migrate. Instead of advantageous and punitive approaches when addressing immigration, we need to urge Congress and other members of our state delegation to approach reform from a human rights perspective. It is at that point a more commonsense solution emerges for all parties involved. But if we continue with this fear-based, punitive approach, we will only end up with things that don't work with enormous costs, both human and economic.

There are many things said about a Peace Corps volunteers' close-of-service (COS); volunteers are joyous, excited, nervous, grateful, and so much more. I was certainly all. When I found out I was coming home, I was beyond nervous, I was terrified and conflicted. I spent days crying asking myself, "Go home to what?" But months before my hasty departure I had applied to different NGOs, non-profits, international organizations, and federal government positions because I felt the need to move on. I even had interviews that without delay concluded as soon as the statement, "Wait, you're still in Africa?" was made. :) Now an opportunity to move forward had come and I for a second felt I couldn't take a step further. My friends were my eyes and ears at this point. They reminded me of lost enthusiasm…erratic motivation…and wants, that in early 2009, Mali just couldn't offer.

With that, I made that phone call and confirmed the date home. Excitement rushed through me like a needle hidden in a seat designed for my rear. I was going home and for the first time couldn't wait. I had denied myself thoughts of going home for a short visit for fear of not wanting to return. But something about that one-way ticket peaked all that had seemed lost. My enthusiasm, motivation, and attitude because I couldn't foresee any closed doors. I had just spent 23 months of my life in one area, learning, immersing into a place to aiming leave behind something advantageous and more importantly to better myself. This feeling was more than the sentiments I experienced on the way to Mali. It was the feeling of having met my commitment and knowing that I could do much more. For the first time in my life, I felt free! Free of doubts, fear, excuses, and confusion because all at once I knew who I was. I left so unsure of my post-college future and scared even, but I wasn't afraid anymore and am certainly not afraid now. From that point on, the only thing I could see was up. And it was my passion, newly-formed outlook on relationships, and my relationship with God that assured that. This blog will highlight how those things came to be along with some memorable reverse culture shock moments.

You may remember in one of my first blogs, I shared a story of a doctor that had concluded his service, went off to medical school, and then came back to the Peace Corps to work as our Regional Medical Officer. He concluded his candid speech on why we should be responsible and take our meds with I left hot West Africa after 27 months with the feeling that I could do absolutely anything. I concluded that blog with, "I hope to be able to say the same thing."

Three years later, I can.

Cultural shock moments:

Cookies anyone?The first time I went to the grocery store was to buy cookies and that was a bit overwhelming. There were too many options. I think I stood at the cookie isle for at least half an hour before I walked out.

PO Box

The post office doesn't close early on Fridays. In Mali, I had to plan to go to the post office because sometimes it would close early (without notice) and it was closed on Fridays. It really blew my mind to see that the post office stayed open all day, every day until 5.

Slow moments

Businesses in Mali would shut down early or were often left unattended for a variety of reasons: if business was slow, if it was raining, or if someone was praying, etc. For whatever reason, I accepted that this same behavioral pattern existed here.

Caroline du Sud

The layover in Paris allowed me to explore the airport for a few hours until finally boarding with other Americans with the same destination to Atlanta, GA. I was surrounded by people from Southern states. Even though I was stoked about the plane food and movie options, I couldn't help but to zoom in on the accents. Everyone seriously spoke with a heavy drawl. Hours later, I met my family and heard the same style of accent. I couldn't help but to ask myself and God if I too sounded like this.ATL

Atlanta was the worst place I could have gone upon entering the country. I experienced sooo many instances of culture shock to the point where my reactions were just flat-out rude. I literally found myself staring at people with my mouth wide open.

Koom—bay—ya

Most Peace Corps volunteers got along in Mali. We had our differences but usually dealt with them respectfully and consistently aimed at harmonious relationships. I was saddened--discouraged even, when I didn't see that here, especially in politics. I watched the '08 election year from a distance. I remember some instances of shots being taken at opponents, and when the election was over, assumed that was it. However, that was not the case. Since I've been home, I've been led to horrific images of our President, things that occurred during his candidacy, and utterly distasteful and disrespectful images of the first lady. How could I have been so oblivious to the defaming nature of politics? Is it really too much to believe that one fights when it's time to fight and battles are subdued when the time calls for it. And even while in battle, self-dignity and a conscience allows one to fight with honor and pride?

And I have given thee, the commandment to Love thy neighbor…The absence of this commandment is far too prevalent in our society. Decency is absent in our politics; a fast-paced society has fostered impatience and hostility; there is a lack of communality amongst neighbors; and selfishness has trickled into rhetoric and legislation to keep some from contributing to society and to guard greed. In keeping with my naïveté, we are a civilized nation that has to have laws on how to share. I don't want to rant on America (for fear of being called a terrorist), but our culture has not kept one of God's greatest commandments.

Bigger adjustments:

Relationships:

I've learned so much about relationships—of ALL kinds. One of the primary problems most Peace Corps volunteers encounter while serving is the lack of immediate or timely results. My personal frustrations were Malians didn't want to "work," but rather insisted on conversations for hours. Little did I know, spending those moments with me were equivalent in some aspects to work-related functions. In a communal society such as Mali, business and personal relationships are not independent of one another. All relationships are personal and a good day at work could be just making a new friend. From this, I've learned how to be a better friend, sister, companion, supporter, and more importantly, how to listen and forgive.

Family:

I love my family, simply put. I was really close to my host family and I couldn't wait to be around my birth family again. Can't get enough of them!!

Friends:

I no longer have the same friends and reasonably so. So much time has passed and people change and grow different directions. But there are a couple relationships I wish hadn't been affected by my service. I think of these relationships often. I never expected to be here with these individuals. I did not think about how my service would affect my closer relationships and would in fact create an opportunity to cultivate new, meaningful ones. The state of past relationships are so unclear to me, it forced me to ask myself, "Had I not gone abroad, would things be different?" I've allocated more than enough time reflecting on the "what ifs"of these relationships. I had to learn to forgive myself and accept that I did not have all the answers and what is meant to be shall be. Despite all, my heart guards the memories made.

Faith:

Before I left for Africa, I think my relationship with God was limited to belief. I withheld on that relationship. I had shaky, need-to-earn faith, and was unsure of following God's direction. But some experiences forced me to open up and more importantly to seek God more. I read my Bible far more than I had. I would talk to God, but through it all I felt he was not with me. It's funny because I may not have always reciprocated my relationship with Him [pre-Mali], but I felt closer to Him. I went to church, was on the choir, and my closer friends were very spiritual. But in 2007-2009 I had never felt further from God and in this case I sought Him! I know that God was waiting on that first Sunday morning I went to church at home to make me truly understand Footprints.

Health:

My health has faced some challenges. In earlier blogs of 2007, I wrote of being ill too often. I remember writing, "I've never felt so awful." But those moments have made my immune system a brick wall. Since being home I have not been sick. I've faced awfully cold weather but still trucked on. I attribute that to my commitment to exercise obtained somewhere in the early part of my service. Mali is not an exciting place and I would often have to plan a full day. I started incorporating exercise in my routine and have never felt better. I got to the point where I could job 5k in a little over half an hour. Awesome! I biked all the time. I believe the farthest I've bike was right around 60 kilometers. Not only did I feel better about the accomplishments, but it deflected any potential health risks. We were on a lot of medication in Mali. Some of it had potential adverse effects on my health. The Peace Corps Medical Officer had once told me that two prescriptions were going to give me high blood pressure and/or something else. She continued to say if that should happen; I would need to be on additional medication to combat those lurking risks. I did not want that. I was not as health conscious as I am now, but I knew that was the wrong road for me. So I began exercising even more. I went from 5k to 6k, always pushing for 10. I'd bike more. I'd stretched longer to increase flexibility and sought out more fruits and veggies; which meant reducing the amount of food I would eat with my host family. That offended them, but I knew the end result would be better and so it was. Those potential risks did vanish.

I've tried to keep that motivation with me. When I first came home I continued the exercise part, but my diet was increasingly tempted by new food options which sadly led to Amerikki weight :( But the difference now is I'm fully aware of the results of sticking on a "health-conscience" path. My food decisions are so much better. I always aim to eat fruits, veggies, and lean poultry (plus my body was CRAVING them!), and am continually learning how to lead a healthy life style.

Now what???

God has opened so many doors for me. One of the last positions I applied for in Mali was a fellowship that had a food security research component. Mali's 80% agriculture-based economy sparked an interest understanding the intersection of agriculture and economics. I unfortunately did not receive that fellowship. What I thought was another missed opportunity was God opening another door. Not even three months after being home, I learned of a small non-profit that has an Initiative that works with minority farmers in the poorest areas of SC. The initiative created a farmer's market in an inner-city in one of South Carolina's wealthiest counties: Lexington. I became one of three project managers of that initiative. I was afforded the opportunity to become more involved in food security locally.

Now I'm working to tackle immigration—organizing and advocating for reform. Being a part of this movement has impacted me beyond words. I've met so many people and have learned so much. This position is fairly new, but I've already gained so much and am prayerful about what lies ahead.

West African International Softball Tournament…WAIST

Next week I’m going on vacation. I’m here in Bamako now. Every year there’s a softball tournament in Dakar, Senegal. PC Volunteers from nearby countries form teams to compete in the softball tournament. I’m going this year. I’m really looking forward to it. Even more so, I’m looking forward to vacation. I need a vacation!!! The last one I took was in Ghana, and that was nearly a year ago. I should have taken one sooner, but the time has come. I’m looking forward to the tournament and doing some touristy stuff. I’m not exactly sure of the number of PCVs going, but we’re taking a bus from Bamako to the Kayes Region, spending the night there, and leaving for Dakar. It’s the same on the way back. All in all, going to take 4 days of travel-2 there and 2 back. I heard it’s a rough ride. It’d be nice to fly, but soooo not in my budget. Maybe one day. I’m really looking forward to buying new fabric from Senegal. In Ghana, I bought all kinds of fabric, and the especially the famous Kente cloth. I don’t know why I buy it. All of it is just sitting in my suitcase. I did want tailors here to make clothes for me w/ it, but I think I might hold on to it all until I get back to the states and have a professional tailor make clothes for me. I really like this fabric and just don’t want to be disappointed. And of course, I’m ready for the Senegalese entrees!! It’s been hard eating Malian food lately. I’ve broken away from the traditional rice and sauce and have just been eating salads. My host family’s not pleased. So, the next time I can tell you all about my trip to Dakar. See you soon!!

It’s hot season again. Not officially, but cold season wasn’t the least bit cold. It was maybe cold for a week. Now temperatures are back up and constant sweat has once again started. Because of this heat influx, I now sleep outside. I just can’t take the heat that comes w/ sleeping indoors anymore. But it’s so great b/c there’s a new moon or something right now (you astrologists will have to correct me) and I love watching it every night before I go to sleep. The stars are amazing. This I know may sound dreamy but I don’t remember watching the stars at home the way I do here. I guess w/ electricity and things, you just don’t think about it. Here most people are outdoors at night b/c of there isn’t any electricity. So a nightly ritual (before I downloaded Scrubs on my IPOD) is to sit outside on the porch and look up. Believe it or not, star watching is entertaining. I’ve noticed all kinds of things. A heart-shape constellation that was visible this same time last year has reappeared. I’ve gotten pretty acquainted with the more well-known constellations, AND, the best part, I see shooting/falling stars that light up the sky. It’s soooooooo amazing. Seriously. Never, did I see anything of the sort in the States. When I do leave, I am definitely going to miss sleeping outside.

To present personal, up-close situations of the effect of aid giving I attempted to address in a previous bog, I want to talk about two separate scenarios: the construction project and my women’s assoc. Going back to the project, I want to kind of explain the dialogue that took place between me and community members to get the Partnership proposal underway The mayor came to me for help financing the kindergarten school. I immediately took it upon myself to fill out a proposal of some sort-actually two: as you may know, the Peace Corps Partnership Proposal which is currently seeking donations online, and the Small Project Assistance Proposal which is money given to Peace Corps by USAID for related projects. I am sad to admit this but it did not occur to me to try and work within the community first for ALL related costs. However, when I did realize this, I tried to backpedal and do just that. I asked teachers and directors from nearby schools, when they need funding for something like desks, books, toilettes, walls, ect…, what do they do. All of them had the same response: “We search for a NGO to fund it.” I asked them why and why wouldn’t they do any of the following: take money from school budgets, hold parent-teacher conferences, talk with those on the hierarchy ladder, and talk to needed officials. Again, they all had the same two responses; “B/c you all would fund it,” or “We can/could do that. Didn’t really think about that.” Again the affect of aid does reflect on the “helper or aid giver.” As previously stated, I too did not think to ask these questions and of these mechanisms beforehand. What did spark that however was reading a capacity-building book. To sum it up: It said the aid giver usually can’t wait to help those in lesser need. I guess that’s understandable, but that negative outcome of that is people become dependent on that, and not their own work. They’re also less appreciative of whatever project the aid is towards just b/c it’s not their money. However, the effect of aid has gone both ways. I thought it was my duty to present outside aid options and the community members expected that. Moreover, when a problem arises, community members don’t work within themselves to solve it; they simply look for assistance elsewhere. The article covered how pressure is not placed on citizens to be involved in their local communities either fiscally or actively engaged. We have however move passed that and have done some of the more internal items. The mayor has agreed to write a letter to the Minister of Education in hopes of him including the kindergarten school on his list of must do items on his education agenda. We’re going to talk to local officials in Koutiala and possibly Sikasso, and we just held our 2nd meeting this past Tuesday involving the parents of the students. I feel we’re moving towards capacity-building and am really glad at all the effort presented.

The other situation: I presented three income generating ideas to my women’s assoc, (they rejected all), but the president of the association really wanted a machine to obtain a form of current and need financial assistance. She asked me to help fund it. I wouldn’t have had a problem w/ this, except they had no money to put towards it and rejected ways to obtain finances for their personal means and that of the association. That was the last meeting we had and I am not going to fill out a proposal application for it. There’s nothing about the association that’s promising and proved to be sustaining even w/ the machine.

I’ve been thinking a lot about that article I read and I definitely understand where the author of it is coming from. There are numerous scenarios that support it. The great thing about it is I’ve recognized that before it’s too late, and w/ everything I do from here out at my site will be from the ground-up.

I held a meeting w/ the parents of the students that attend kindergarten school to discuss and inform them of the project. It went well, but I was disappointed in attendance. They’re 56 students, so an excellent number would have been anywhere from 56 to 112 parents. The second time around, I received 11 parents. Can’t ask for much more than that I guess. The first time I tried to hold the mtg, only 3 parents came. What’s even better though is they’re all men. Men tend to pull the weight on decision-making, money-related decisions. We formed a committee and they’re going to present a long-term plan on improving the kindergarten school. I’m really glad. That’s one thing that has come from this project that I can honestly say I’m really proud of--people working together. The idea is long after the construction of the fence, the parents are going to keep interest in improving the school. They’re going to follow the plan until the school is completely refinished. In this sense, the project is sustainable. With community involvement and motivation, much can be accomplished. But I did want this blog to discuss the project more in detail. The kindergarten school is a one-room school that houses 56 students and lies in an open-field. There are no desks, just mini-wooden stools, no toys, and no form of security. There is one dedicated teacher who was before this project without a lot of support. The fence I’m raising funds for is to provide the students w/ a secluded and protected learning environment. The students tend to play or wander away from the school, posing safety concerns. Motorists and unauthorized vehicles drive on the school’s premises. With 56 students, it’s really difficult for the teacher to watch all the students w/out a visible perimeter. In addition to the need of a fence, the school needs desks. B/c there aren’t any desks, the students sometimes sit outside in the porch area. There are mini-wooden stools, but not enough for all the students. The school also lacks games. The teacher invests her personal money in games created by the local carpenter for the children’s amusement. The mayor wanted the project to include all of those items: a fence, desks, and games (specifically a seesaw and swing set), and if not too expensive, another room, but the total costs were around an unfeasible $12,000 (w/out the cost of building an extra room). With the fence alone, we’ve reduced it to nearly $8,000 w/ a partnership contribution of more than $4,000. It is unfortunate that we can’t take care of all the expenses, but I’m hoping that’s where the committee will pick up. Maybe in time, the kindergarten school will have all of that and much more. In the meantime, we are taking donations for the school. Anyone reading this can donate by simply going to peacecorps.gov, clicking the “donate now” tab in the left-hand corner, and using one of the search indicators(name-listed, country: Mali, state: SC), and find the project entitled Child Care Center Construction. Simply click on that and donate!!!

Site right now is at a low-point. Peace Corps studies indicate that around the year mark, volunteers experience a low-point of their service. They reflect and try to imagine the future and become discourage. This is also the period with a considerable number of early terminations. Nonetheless, I am "that" volunteer. I really feel as if I haven't done much the past year. I've been working with my women's association, and well that has reach the end of its road. The women are no longer interested in meeting or being an association. Everyone is thinking about themselves. From August to November, I tried to have three meetings with the women's association, and only the president and vice-president showed up. The women rejected my final income generating activity (sweet, crusted shell peanut making) and well, I'm out of ideas. They're only interested in Basin-making (Malian fabric), but do not want to meet so we can continue. I don't know what else to do.

My kindergarten project is not raising nearly enough money. I've sent out information to referrals and have been trying to contact my sorority and local newspapers in order to get the word out. I really need exposure brought to my project b/c it is an excellent project w/ a good cause, that is determine to aid a lot of students. But also w/ that, where else can I go? Even more disappointing, the community will not have their portion of project contribution. I'm hoping something with that turns around by late February.

Right now I'm in Bamako for Christmas and going back to Koutiala (my banking/market town) to celebrate New Year's. I wanted to be in the capital for that, but staying here requires too much money, and well after 3 days, I'm already broke. I really wanted to see everyone though. It's been a while since a group of volunteers got together.

I was reading this article entitle, "The Pitfalls of Africa's Aid Addiction" and it made an interesting case against Africa's aid. The article captured individual examples of how aid has force the continent to stay dependent on foreign resources, and not demanding more from citizens within. It also brings into question the intent of those who donate to Africa, which tend to alienate African citizens. I thought the article was well-written and expressed considerable points, but now the thought-process stimulated from the article is what's the next move? The article opened with a saying, "A fool at 40 is a fool forever," and most African countries have now been independent for over 40 years and statistics show not much have change w/ the aid since independence. The first paragraph concludes w/ a question: Since foreign aid has failed to lift Africa out of poverty, could corruption be the reason? I won't go into corruption in Africa, but that question made me think; If aid has failed Africa, do we STOP giving aid? What would happen if that took place? Africa would no doubt suffer. Things would worsen dramatically, but for how long? This would definitely be a sink or swim scenario. A drastic effect could force Africans to pull themselves up by their boot-straps and get themselves out of poverty. It would increase individual independence, motivate African citizens and African governments to always have the best interest of their citizens in mind.

After spending so much time here, my views too have changed on Africa. I no longer believe that anything is wrong with Africa, and being here has made me more resistant to give. The idea of "aide" has settled in the minds of many Africans. They expect so much from people. Not giving is not an option, and if you don't give, well, there are a list of names for you. I can't exactly understand it. Part of me thinks it's because the African society is very communal and one shares everything, but part of me thinks, it's because so many citizens are so used to handouts and donations that it has become expected. Many Peace Corps Volunteers feel that way-that most Malians only want something with minimal effort. It's another thing that discourages us, but it does force one to question the definition and purpose of aid.

The purpose of aid, obviously, is to help someone. But who determines that help? The helper might asses the situation and deem this person in need of assistance, or the helpee might ask the helper because that person is bigger, stronger, and has something that he/she wants. In terms of the West vs Africa, there is much Africa is lacking, but in terms of the West and the developing world, that would mean there's much the REST of the world is lacking. There are more under/undeveloped countries than developed ones, but the notion of superiority and have and have nots float continuously throughout the globe, forcing those lacking to consider themselves the problem of disadvantage economics equation instead of turning that notion around, and considering that those who benefit rather well from this equation have too much. When I say there's nothing wrong w/ Africa, I mean in relation to the rest of the world. What is here is how 2/3 of the world live: w/out elaborate infrastructure, low social indicators, and mediocre to substandard GDP factors. These things can change overtime and more likely will if done at its own pace and not w/ the outpouring of an international aid supply.

I love my [host] family. You're probably thinking….ok? But, the thing is, I wasn't suppose to. I came here thinking that I was going to help-to work only; make a difference if you will. Forming bonds and making personable connections wasn't on the list. I never saw myself becoming attach to anyone. Come to think of it, I didn't even know if I thought about the social aspect of my life during my PC service [before I got here]. But that has taken off before much of my work has. The two youngest sons of my host mom are the closest people to me. Issiaka, the youngest one, has this unfathomable personality--something difficult to finding Mali. He loves to laugh and always looks for ways to have fun. Doudou, the older one, is more reserved, but intuitive and selfless. I'd do anything within my means for those boys. My host mom is truly a character. She likes to have fun, likes good things, but is grounded. She does a lot. She's over 60 yrs old and aims to work at a local market at least four days a week. She has had 13 kids-one died-and has given so much of herself to support them, so that they in return of course, can support her. One of her un-wed daughters has yet to receive her diploma to become a certified seamstress. She has taken the much needed exam twice, costing her and the family over 350,000cfa ~786 USD. It takes the avg Malian 17 ½ months to make that amount, for my host mom whose only income is selling things in market, it took years. After my host sister and mom received the disappointing news, they cried endlessly, and as you probably guessed, I cried with them. But it didn't end there. We cried all lunch, all afternoon, evening, throughout our daily routine actions, I cried as my host mom cleaned my house and told me she now has nothing b/c all that was invested is now lost. I cried as she asked me through her tears, "Now what am I going to do?" Two days before this incident occurred, I had not gone to work out of discouragement and boredom simply b/c it is the rainy season, there is little to do. The next day, however, I went to the mayor's office to talk to my counterpart, which happens to be my host sister's biological sister. See I had been trying for some time now to organize the women's association to start working on another income generating activity (IGA). Out of the three meetings personally held, around three women, with a membership closing 20, came, and not all at the same time. But that didn't stop me. It wasn't until I talked w/ the women and saw their apathy that had discouraged me. As a result, I spent two days in my house, rethinking my purpose, searching and praying for a new direction. As you can imagine, this situation w/ my host sister became an eye-opener for me. She spent her mother's last dime for a certificate that demonstrates she's educated for employed. I have mine, am employed, and spent two days doing nothing. I told my counterpart what was going on in her mother's (my host mom's) house b/c even though she lives near by, she had no idea. Part of my IGA involved sewing. I had practiced some sewing and even taught my counterpart how to use the machine. But at least three other women from the association would need to learn how to use a sewing machine. I'm not that skilled. I asked my counterpart if her sister could sew w/ us and the women for the assoc…just so her mind would be free for a while. She agreed. Hours later, my counterpart called her sister and had her come to the mayor's office. It turns out…you guessed it: a happy Solution, not ending. The mayor is willing to employ my host sister for a limited-training session to teach the women how to use the machines. It's not enough money , and will only lasting a little while, but for the time being she is employed. This however, will only alleviate the worries of my family for a little while. Before we know, it'll be here again. Fret and anxiety will attack at one of the plenty inopportune moments, stripping us of our relief. And again, breaching seeping wounds. That sentence wasn't suppose to say 'we'. I had expected to remain emotionally absent, distant even, and focused. Except all that changed. I am emotionally bound and this incident is the first of many that will make it harder, impossible even to separate their life from my own.