Epilogue

August 11th, 2010 Tuscaloosa, Alabama

The final theme song: “Lullaby” by Sia

The final quote: “The Royal Spanish academy defines the word ‘impossible’ as something that doesn’t have the facilities or means to come to pass… or succeed.

And they define ‘improbable’ as something implausible….that isn’t founded on prudent reason.

Given the choice, I prefer the improbable over the impossible.

Like everyone does, I suppose.

That David beat Goliath was improbable, but it happened.

An African-American living in the White House was improbable, but it happened.

That the band ‘Baron Rojo’ would ever play together again was improbable, but it happened.

Nadal taking the number one spot from Federer.

A journalist becoming a princess

The 12-1 win against Malta

That’s why I don’t like to talk about impossible, but improbable.

Because the improbable is by definition probable

That which most certainly wont happen… can actually happen.

And while there is a chance, half a chance in a billion, that it can actually happen…

…its worth a try.”

–That was so ridiculous who said that that you don’t even want to know what it is from

I like epilogues. It’s a whiff of the story you are never actually supposed to hear. The line after “happily ever after….” The drink after last call… The true proof that no matter where you end up in the story of your life there is no “The End”

Life… for better or for worse, will just keep going on. Though this blog (and if I ever turn it into a book) already has a “The End” to it….i felt a final entry of what has happened and what is to come was in order. I take my inspiration for that kind of thinking from Frank McCourt’s far better but lesser known “Teacher Man” where his epilogue is “…ill try.”

For a month I lived in my mothers basement in Vienna, Virginia. Your typical 30 year old single boy living in your mothers basement. How proud and mighty the Returned Peace Corps Volunteers are…. I try to think of another 30 year old single man volunteering to live at home with his mother. The only person who came to mind is Jesus…..technically that’s my name too.

So anyway… my lifelong friends were days away from their third child, Obama had become unpopular, new problems in the world had been discovered and by in large everyone and everything just felt the same but with a new set of parameters….

Oh…but now everything was expensive as all hell! I was a cheap bastard before I left for service, and after living off less than 5 dollars a day for two years the concept of paying for some of the things in America that cost more than 5 dollars was literally insane. I saw 16 year old cars driving SUV’s by themselves without the vehicle being stuffed to the rafters as she drove from one end of a mall parking lot to another end to avoid walking. I see pavement leading to each and every persons home, which is not made of felt. I see green and trees that will still be that color in the winter and the sky looks so much further away. I don’t fear dogs anymore, I can eat hummus at every meal (which I do) and my bed…my bed is bliss incarnate.

So a lot of changes right? Not really. Instead I see that the essentials of life in America are right about the same as in Mongolia, and its only details and semantics about abstract ideas like “comfort” “necessity” and “danger” that are so contrasting. We can all pretend we are as different from one another as we would like. You can keep your accent, eat a different food and march in all the nationality parades that you would like, but from one end of the world to the other everyone to me is exactly the same but with a different set of environments and economic and lifestyle upbringings.

I wanted to do more Peace Corps, but as usual dream jobs got in the way. I mean it too. Much like before I left for Peace Corps service I don’t know where the answers I am seeking out of life are but Peace Corps at least taught me it does not come from a geography and profession switch. I did however find Peace Corps service to be the most rewarding things I have ever done…by far. Yet my Masters Degrees, weather tolerance, administration experience, indifference to salaries and Spartan lifestyle ate right through a 9% unemployment rate and got me work at a dream job in Tuscaloosa, Alabama. You know now that I say that city name…that seriously could pass for a Mongolian town name!

“Josh, haanaas ircen?”

(Josh, Where did you come from?)

“be oo?? Be Tuscaloosaas ircen”

(me?? I’m from Tuscaloosa)

Think of it like replacing a town title as long as Bagakhangai with a word like Tuscaloosa. You see, even worlds apart they things we name don’t sound all that different if you roll them on your tongue long enough!!!!

My apartment is far beyond anything I deserve or need. I think President Elberdorj of Mongolia has a smaller and less luxurious place than I do now. There is a lesson in that for everyone….even Elberdorj if you ask me…

I may have taken a dream job now, but I don’t think Peace Corps and I are done. Peace Corps is 50 years old, and once I get a doctor title in my name and do some amazing research and help some young adults with some difficult periods of their lives I see myself drawn to Peace Corps again at some point or another.

Before I joined Peace Corps I was doing a job I loved. Now I am my old’s jobs boss. Helping supervise a group of people dedicated to providing a healthy and safe living environment for a group of young adults from all walks of life who are all at different stages of moral development grow and learn and become a part of a community that they are proud of. Sounds like a good way to spend a portion of my life, and I might just learn grow a little more myself in the process.

My stuff is all in a pile in my apartment. I have moved a great number of times over the last five years. Each time upon “moving” I would have a mound of things to put away, but it was this “pile” image that I never seem to shake all that much.

I just drove from Vienna, Virginia to Greensboro, North Carolina and from there today to Tuscaloosa, Alabama in my grandfathers ole 1995 red colored Ford Taurus with all my worldly possessions. The license plate says “THE RED5” I guess I really am never going to grow up am I? At some point or another I guess I need to take all of my odds and ends out of boxes and turn it into a place that one day ill put back into boxes again. That’s not a sad feeling to me…rather one that reminds you of how awesome each new place is.

About a year ago I was moving from an apartment to a ger, and the year before that from a house to that apartment. In the last 5 years I have lived/worked/stayed in Washington DC, Thailand, Cambodia, Vietnam, New York City, Mongolia, Hong Kong, back to Washington DC and now I call Tuscaloosa, Alabama home. After a combo like that what on Earth could possibly top that for my next home?

…home… you would be amazed how abstract and amazing that word is if you think about it long enough.

Final words??? Uh…never piss into the wind (Okay so maybe I did learn a little in Mongolia)

Nah…the parting words are like the ones I once wrote before. It’s the thing that my time in Peace Corps taught me without ever saying the words. The most important thing to remember is that there is no bad way to live your life. There are no wasted years unless you tell yourself they were wasted; there are no golden years unless you call them that. They are all wasted or all golden because you say so, so say they all rock for crying out loud and no matter what you did during them.

Whether you were/are/will be say…. a rolling stone like me, or a family man like my life friends and a family of 5 at the age of 30 David and Martha. Rich or poor, humble or flamboyant, CEO or PCV, occupational or unemployed, blue, white or green collared (google it)….none of these are better or worse. Make them all important, make them all good. There is no bad so long as YOU choose to like them. It’s life, its YOUR life! Don’t ever lose track of how cool absolutely everything is that is going on right here and now.

So that’s it everyone. Hope you enjoyed this….

…bye…

Its the whole thing...start to finish. I had this great final clip that was me doing the "well....im back" line from Lord of the Rings......but mom didnt press the record button and it felt wierd to do it once my hair was cut. Anyway....enjoy if your interested.

This is an air traffic controller who lives in Kharkhorum who never had a day of formal english or music education.....i kid you not...unless he kidded me of course.

June 20th 2011. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

“I am old …and so tired…” -Atrus

Today I had an exit interview with the country director. I had my Peace Corps ID card invalidated and I stepped in and out of the office of the Peace Corps of Mongolia for the last time. I only knew the place two years, didn’t even spend all that much time in the office either, but the concept of imbue is something I brought up in the previous entries of this blog. The idea that we are what we put into the things we associate with. As I left the office for a final time, sat there on the small little bench in front of the entrance and just took a deep breath in and out…I felt it all. I was and had been for the last two years a Peace Corps Mongolia Volunteer. I took in all the emotions. The good, the bad, the ugly and especially the weird. I took in the milestones of PST, swearing in (May the Force be with us.) living in Ondortolge, Dadal Vacations, a pretty girl I like very much, 25 day horseback treks into the taiga, Bagakhangai, and everything else in between…and in one deep exhale that ended in crying I realized all that I was no longer that what I am. That while I may have new facebook friends, have made subtle differences to people in the towns I have lived and and spent 2 years of my life on the other side of the world that that…all of that was no longer me. I was someone else entirely. That which no longer was me…I had to let go. From this day forward I am no longer a Peace Corps Volunteer, a PCV. I am now a “Returned Peace Corps Volunteer” An RPCV. Returned is such a funny word. Maybe ill find a trash barrel…burn all of my identifications, run off to a kibbutz and never see America as long as I live but from this point on I am indeed a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer….

It’s gone… it’s done….

A long long time ago, I played a video game that went on to be the best selling video game series of all time. Myst. Many people know Myst, or at least the very the first one. It was a video game with real life style type animation that for the time was so real…it took everyones breath away…or at least those of us who realized that if this was what was happening now what video games would look like before too long….and with what video games look like now I am pretty sure that before too long you will be playing video games you cant tell apart from real life…

What many people do not know is that four more series based games came afterwards. The plot of the Myth books was the story of the life of Atrus, a man who with a pen could write whole worlds that actually came to life in their own ways. His goal through all of the games (his lifetime) was to create and protect a world for a species members of his family had destroyed previously known as the D’ni. The final game follows the plot of Atrus’s daughter, who is trying to ensure that the book/world is protected. (its complicated)

At the start of the game Atrus writes to his old friend (the person actually playing the game) He expresses himself so melancholy during it, uncertain that all his work has amounted to anything at all, or with a single stroke of bad fate will an entire species and his life’s work be destroyed. It is during this opening that he makes the statement I quoted above. A quote that perhaps it was the way in which I first heard it or just the way it moved me but the line was so simple: “I am old now…and so tired.”

I think it is this “tired” mentality that we often feel near the end of our toils. I really am at the end of Peace Corps service. My ger is gone, the paperwork is all turned in, the winter is long behind and an army of newbloods are already settling in doing and learning all the things I had to two years ago. I sit around the capital of Ulaanbaatar and realize that the term “tired” really does describe how I feel.

Tired is how I have felt at the end of almost all major accomplishments and failures of my life. The way in which being tired can be either the happiest or saddest thing ever astounds me.

I have felt the sadness one can feel when tired at the end of a great toil. The exhaustion of something that had led to nothing. More than that, it had destroyed a wish of mine. Something I had wanted for as long as I could have remembered. At the end I didn’t even have the energy to be angry of the wasted time and shattered dream. I just put my head down, and let my body pass out. That went on for months. Occasionally I awoke, to feed myself or to work a job so I had enough money to stay alive, but truly for close to a year I was nearly bedridden with loss and grief. The memory of that time truly haunts me.

…. And obviously, that is not how I feel about my time in the Peace Corps. (DUH!!!!)

Far from it, in fact its my example of the other kind of tired one feels at the end of a great accomplishment. There is those times where you reach the end of a great journey or adventure. A trip of your lifetime, one that you have a hundred amazing stories to tell your friends…and a thousand more stories that you will keep to yourself. The type of exhaustion you feel at the end of a marathon where you realize that you have done something even you doubted yourself capable of. You feel in that moment like this was not even truly as far as you could have reached either. You realize that truly the only thing that holds you back is the limit to your own ambition. The world is yours. And the exhaustion you feel does not overwhelm you, rather it comforts you. The release of stresses now that the task is done, the mind free of worry that you kept inside you, and the ability to slip soundly to sleep knowing a job is well done.

You can almost hear the song with the harp from the Lord of the Rings soundtrack as you drift to sleep.

“Lay down…your sweet and weary head. Night is falling, you have come to journeys end. Sleep now, dream of the ones who come before. They are calling, from across the distant shore.”

The past few weeks I have spent bathed in the light of the warm Mongolian June sun, emptying out my bank account by nursing Gem beers in a beer tent and just reminiscing on all that I have done while out here. The good times I seem to laugh at and enjoy and feel as though the memory will never fade, and the hard times seem so funny now, and so very far away.

Unlike my previous times and reminiscing this is no longer done in the company of fellow Peace Corps Volunteers. Some are still here in the country, but not with me. There is noone to share stories with anymore of all that has happened. Instead I am left with only myself to think. This has been some of my most and least productive times of thinking. Which is this?

I guess like all opposites you need to experience one to fully appreciate the other, but as we come to the end of Peace Corps as well as this blog I guess I just feel the exhaustion that comes from accomplishing a life long dream, and realizing that if I had not done this, I would never have forgiven myself. Its something I will hold very dear in my heart, and will give me the sleep of a toddler for many days to come.

It is knowing more about the relativity of good times and bad. Its knowing just how bad things can get, and at those times knowing that it could have been so much worse. Its also about remembering some of the greatest experiences and times of my life, and realizing that while I shall have more of them in the years to come these specific ones will never happen again.

This entry is not supposed to sound melancholy, though I know it does. Its my assessment of self-awarement taken in at arms length. If I truly “learned” from this mentality of trying to find the neutral to all I would go back to Pathumthani Thailand right now and spend my days in walking meditation and try not to let anything effect me one way or another. Instead I take a milder approach. I try to realize that the good and the bad will always eventually pass, and to wallow or to try to hold on to that which is not eternal must truly be let go.

I write this entry very tired. The good kind of tired. The kind that comes from the settling of a great imbalance from before. I am finished with my first tour of Peace Corps service. I have accomplished a life long goal, and I think I am not full of shit as I had feared for so long. In less than a week I make my way to China, into Hong Kong and then back to America.

…. Its been a hell of a ride….now if you will excuse me I need to go pick up my stepfather from the airport tomorrow! ….

June 30, 2011. The T97 Train Between Beijing and Hong Kong

Well…its been a while. I guess I might as well wrap all this up. So the pickup of my stepfather from the airport did not go as well as I would have liked. I just could not get the UB guesthouse owner to grasp the concept that in less than 15 minutes a plane was going to land at the airport and it takes over a half hour to reach the place if there is no traffic (there would be) “ok..bro…no problem bro…” He just wouldn’t stop saying that over and over again. I got mad, hadn’t gotten mad in a while but this was getting to be too much. The rainy weather (it had rained all day…I have been in Mongolia over 2 years and it had never done that!) I said “NOW!” It had zero effect. Additionally, once we finally left the guesthouse he drove to his own home to drop himself off and let his driver take me to the airport. Cars were broken down and a 30 minute drive took an hour. We were impressively late and by the time we pulled up to the airport the plane had pretty much unloaded. I sprinted inside and luckily my experienced traveling stepfather was calmly sitting in a chair on his own, just looking around and smiling to see me spring in in a raincoat and shorts. I got him back to the guesthouse, which was a little below par for his taste. Luckily he suffered it, and I got to spend time in an overcrowded guesthouse while it rained…fun. The next day it continued to pour. It hadn’t rained more than a few hours at any time…it hadn’t stopped in two days. UB was a soup…travel out of the city on the first full day was out of the question, so we saw some sites while wet. We went to Sukbaatar Square, and we also went inside the Mongolia history museum. Were good at museums. We also went for some American Burger and Fries stuff. It was nice to eat something I liked, but too many weeks of decadence were starting to get to me…and the weather didn’t help either. With only 2 full days available for a tour we had a choice, Terelj or Kharkhorum. There was no argument, it would be Kharkhorum. Again money was exchanged between me and the guesthouse. There was still something that annoyed me that despite the fact that my stepfather had money I was literally paying over 50 times what this would cost me if I arranged it myself and at very little additional discomfort, but alas time was short. Ching-ching and off we went. I had been there before, but it was still wonderful to see the place. Eric was impressed, and armed with a good camera caught a lot of great shots that he would later share with me.

We got back and for our last full day in Mongolia I arranged for a driver to take us to my first hometown of Erdene. From there I saw my sister and mother a final time, who prepared us Tsuivan, my favorite food. Eric got to learn all about them and see all the things I had talked about on my blog. It helped to really show where I had been and what I had done. The weather was still atrocious, but that was the best final day.

We packed up that night to prepare for the trip to China. This was really the end for me. I fully intend to be back but I really really was leaving Mongolia now. It was over. Emotions? Numb…nervous….resigned to the swirl of emotions I knew would follow shortly. The bags were…cumbersome to say the least. Its not easy dragging back 2 years of heartfelt souveniers and mementos with you from Mongolia…they are heavy!

Still, even after weeks of decadence and bad habits in UB I was able to put all my bags on me and carry them onto the train. It was early morning…and as the train pulled away I could watch the city dissapear little by little. Goodbye Ulaanbaatar I said. Ill…no I wont really miss you per say…I hated that city….but I loved this country that’s for sure.

Luckily a few hours later we zoomed by my working town of Bagakhangai. A much fonder farewell took place there. Then…the train started chugging along. Rolling green steppe….that got sandier…and sandier… till it was all sand, and I for the first time really did go through the Gobi. My take? Not pretty…but very impressive to those who find a way to make this home year round. I argued with food and drink vendors at rest stops because it would be my last chance to use my Mongolian language skills… for at least a very long time. I didn’t get a lower price…I didn’t care!

Then we reached the border by dark…..i could describe in picture and in detail how cool the changing process is, but seriously im sure you could just look it up online with a better and more accurate description. Its literally them lifting us off the ground (all of the train) lots of bangs and clanks to take off the wheels and put on new ones that fit. Very awesome, and something that must be seen to be believed. Glad I got to see that. Fell asleep and when I awoke….China!!!!

It took me off guard that’s for damn sure. It was all so….green….huge buildings everywhere…and it was so…damn….clean. I don’t even mean that as insulting to Mongolia….i loved the place, I just sort of forgot what “clean” actually looks like I think. The longer we stayed in China the more dirty I realized I was!

So after a half day later we arrived at the train station of Beijing. New adventure: HO!!!!!!!! A metric ton on my body and my stepfather wants to look for his bank to test his card. I agreed, and dragged my bags for kilometers in 95 degree weather. Lotta sweating and no bank….ah well. Next we needed a cab. From the train station you cant exactly just flag one down, you gotta stand in line. Im a 6’4 white guy with a lot of luggage….. the scammers and douches eyes turn to money signs and they mentally scream jackpot. TAXI…>TAXEEEEE!!!!!! Blah blah blah. Ive lost my language ability to tell people off, and so I just keep saying no…standing in the massive que. One guy was particularly interested in robbing me blind. I got to the front where taxis are and he grabs the hotel papers out of my hands and says he will walk me to my cab….he tells me the price to get there is 270 yen (that’s 20 bucks) Its 2 kilometers to the fracking hotel….it should run by meter. I ask him where is his meter. He says: No meter…I tell him ill write down a list of places for him to stick that and walk to the guy in line. I get sworn at and he runs over to the next tallest white guy he can find and scam. Its nice to have reached such a level of comfort with myself when I travel…its like while the scenery may change I have that degree of confidence.

So after a 20 yen taxi ride (3 dollars…screw you scammer!) we pull into a VERY nice hotel. I haven’t stayed at a hotel in over 2 and a half years, and this one is REALLY nice. Like when I pulled my bags out of the car someone took them from my shoulders and carried them inside an air conditioned lobby. The air con on the hot day felt heavenly…. There were some language difficulties, but all in all it went smoothly. We went up to the room and I saw a MASSIVE bed…with sheets thicker than my mattress at the guesthouse used to be…let alone what it was like at the ger. The bed was long enough that my feet didn’t crunch…and the bed almost enveloped me as I collapsed into it…. I truly had gone to heaven. The powerful bathroom shower and shampoo bottle wash only brought me to a higher level of enlightenment then that.

After a wash we were both so exhausted, but I had a few chores to run. We went down and booked a Great Wall of China trip. Tourist buses and all. Ah why not right?! We both had been through the ringer in Mongolia….we would let others worry about where we go and what we see for a day in China. We went to a marketplace near our hotel and got some meat on a stick for dinner along with chestnuts and some corn on a stick as well. Delicious exotic and filling.

The Great Wall we saw on the second day. Whats there to say…its as awesome as they make it out to be…and its so full of tourists like myself I fear for the structural integrity of the wall itself! Luckily Eric and I are spry fellows and once we got away from the intial drop off point the crowds tend to die off some. We could have walked more, but once you have your own private section sometimes the best thing to do is just chill and look on in awe. That’s what we did. Awesome it was too! The Ming Tomb of Chang we got to see too. More amazing sites, but the sheer mass of tourists was just daunting to me. I forgotten my dislike of crowds like these. Mongolia had been a perfect haven for me…but China was serving as a passive reminder that the overwhelming majority of the rest of the world is not like that at all. I am not complaining, just pointing out something I had almost forgotten. There are a lot of people in the world!

The third day of China was the best. We crashed early and woke up at 6 to go to the Heavenly Gate Park at 7. Tai Chi, badminton, kung fu, old lady choreographing dance moves, massive temples, and quiet places to walk around. It was a place we were worried we wouldn’t get to see…and we saw almost all of it. We took the subway then to the Forbidden City, and the next 4 hours were lost to massive crowds of almost all Chinese tourists running around while Eric and I listened to absolutely useless audio guides we couldn’t control. We had a great laugh about that. Even with crushing crowds the place is pretty amazing to see. Massive temples, some in their original form…others gift shops. They may still claim to be communists…but capitalism has the last laugh in this country! After that we walked to the hill that overlooks the forbidden city. Oood and awed… the hill is really steep so at the top the crowds disappeared. Yeay again! Beijing is in an eternal state of fog and smog so pictures didn’t come out well, but it matters not. You simply cannot take a picture of this place and do it justice…its just so…. Wow.

The next stop was the lake to the Northwest of the forbidden city. Quiet and pleasant. I began at this point to see how China is making money. There is an entry fee to every single building and structure in this country!!! Now granted its only like 4 dollars per entry, but with the crush of people entering that still builds up very quickly. The lake was nice, and it was on our way to a famous poets house. He was a commie who lived quite large during the 1950’s or so. His courtyard is beautiful and peaceful. We then went to a mansion villa behind it that was teeming with tourists. Im sure it would be lovely if it was not buried in bodies, alas it was. I mostly just sat and waited for Eric to give up on moving around among the masses of tour groups.

From there we walked through bar hutongs (not yet up and running as it was 3pm) and made our way to the bell and the drum towers…. Large numbers of stairs to climb, and adding on the fact we had walked pretty much all of this yea we were getting a good workout. Great views and lots to see. After that we walked back down another famous hutong towards the subway that would take us to our hotel. On the way I met 2 Peace Corps buddies I didn’t even know were in China. They saw me and all I could do was bear hug both of them at the same time. It’s a small…small…small world. We got to talk less than 10 seconds, but even after all the cool crap id seen all day that took the cake. Go Peace Corps forever!!!!!

We got back, showered, and went out to eat Peking Duck…not at any ole place, but at Da Dong’s himself!!!! I know…I had never heard of it either. Of course, I never had eating Peking Duck before either. Delicious, and I hadn’t eaten all day so I was hungry as anything. We had that and a great salad with a good bottle of wine…. The ambiance could not be beat, and nothing tastes better than when your hungry after a full day of tourism. We did a week of things in 10 hours….we were rock stars.

Again, exhausted we went to bed early, and woke up with time to spare to reach the rail station. It was a madhouse, but I have gotten used to them at this point. Since the train technically travels to another country we went through customs and then boarded the train immediately. The China train blows the UB one out of the water. Air Con, personal bathroom, two beds, comphy lounging chair, power for computers….seriously were getting more and more luxurious as we go along. Hong Kong will be next….my first ever five star hotel in a city like Hong Kong…. Now that is gonna be something else. This blogs only got a few final date entries I think…. Sorry…still no real emotion coming from me.

July 7th, 2011. My mothers basement. Vienna, VA. The United States of America….

Hong Kong time is private. Sorry….i am going to keep that to myself. It was the ending of an adventure of my lifetime. I had a great flight home, got my drivers license back, new pair of running shoes, bought another POS phone, applied to get some temp work while looking for the long term jobs…including Peace Corps future work as well… And now in an air conditioned basement I use lightning fast internet and catch up on 2 years of video games that took place while I was away…. The more things change huh….

I am glad I wrote all this down…it feels appropriate…

Thank you for reading…or my condolences for enduring it.

A couple final movie things then this blog is over.

Take care, love as much as you can. And remember that when someone seems happy with not doing something your so accustomed to, when you realize that someone who doesn’t seem to be really “going” anywhere with there lives… just remember: “Not all who wander are lost…”

Hehe…okay, ill say it one more time (at least on this blog..) …

…

…

…

PEACE OUT!!!!!!!!

So when i left my ger, these two humble bags are all that comes with me....

....AND THE NEXT PCV GETS ALL OF THIS FROM ME!!!!! Lucky buggers!!!!

My parting letter to the new PCV taking my place. My handwriting is atrocious!

Awesome picture. First time i had seen my mother in two years. She had cried hysterical tears of joy for about a minute before we took the picture here... the ENTIRE airport watched us!

Mom and i in front of Sukhbaatar Squares mighty Chinngis statue. The first time a woman smiled in a photo of mine in years! (not counting PCV's and travel journalist)

All right, ill admit it. I am a little tall!

Hey check it out....hehe.... i got two moms!

I took my mom to Bagakhangai, my abandoned air force base. I had been meaning to take a photo of this mural for the last two years....you are all aware there has been a Mongolian Cosmonaut right?!

This statue is in the middle of nowhere, big as the Statue of Liberty, and Mom and Sheila were indeed in awe. (they complained about the wind/cold!)

Question: Why is by far the tallest of us on the smallest camel?!?

I forgot what it was like to have someone used to smiling in photos with you!

Not my ger, but a good picture. This is us in Kharkhorum

We didnt go to Phallic rock in Kharkorum, but we came across a few deer stones that allowed us to stare at some long shafted rocks!

I have no idea why, but this is just funny as all hell to me!

My mom was just walkin on sunshine round here

Us at the White Lake...we went horseback riding....we all rode very gracefully and with no difficulty whatsoever!

Mom and I at the volcano next to the lake. Were just walkin on sunshine are we not?!?

The younger and crazier crawled down into the actual volcano itself took this photo of the two nice ladies at the top.....that thing really does go down a bit, i had to crawl out the exact same way too!

June 11th, 2011. On the way out....

I spent the last night in my ger alone. I was sober and quiet the whole night. I had planned to watch the last episode of a great number of TV shows, which I did as well. The very last being Star Trek: The Next Generation’s finale entitled “All Good Things” This morning I woke up to June 11th 2011. The two year anniversary of my time in the Peace Corps. I dragged my heavy and cumbersome bags out of my ger, took a final look…and locked it up. I lived a year of my life in that tiny little tent. An amazing year… 1/100th of my life… (what the hell, ill be an optimist. My granddad is 90 for crying out loud!)

I stopped at the school, had a goodbye party from my friends and colleagues in the town, Sarangoo silver tongued her way into convincing me to give her my camera that was not working very well anyway. I was given a tacky tapestry of Chinngis Khan and his mighty empire. It’s the one tourists buy at 99 cent stores… and its probably going to hang in my future apartment room. We imbue ladies and gentlemen, make no mistake about it. Things that are irreplaceable and priceless hang in millionares mansions with no actual bond or connection to them at all. That tapestry has a million other copies in this country but this is “MY” tapestry given to me as a gift for two years of living service from the peoples of Bagakhangai Mongolia. That is what imbue is, where something worthless becomes priceless to one person alone…

At the bus I took a final look around…a long one too because the driver was out of Diesel fuel which is only hilarious if you live here and you know how hard diesel is to dig up now. I live here so I get the joke…Well I lived there anyway.

I still have nine full days in the Peace Corps. They will be spent in beer tents and collecting stool samples for medical (not at the same time obviously) and for all intensive purposes yes im done here. My stepfather Eric arrives and then I take the train into China, and its only a week after that that I am stateside again for the first time in two years…

Where the hell did two years go????

Its getting a little more scary now. Not scary as in I have no idea what I am doing. Far from it, I have a thousand things I want to and for all intensive purposes can do… the reason im scared is my lifelong goal is over at the age of 30. I am not full of shit. I bedrock know that to myself now. I am proud of myself…really I am… but in the whimsical final words of the Buffy musical: “…where do we go…from here…?” Nah, its post partum thingy.

Little by little ill get this all sorted out. This guesthouse is now absolutely swamped with my stuff, and this afternoon I am off to drop off the fire extinguisher, first aid kit, space heater, and smoke detector… all never used. Lucky me… From there I go and buy a suitcase with wheels so I am more mobile. After that I write my closing report to Peace Corps

…and after that I guess theres nothing to do for the final week but to breathe. Not so much drinking this final week I think. Maybe ill go on a UB adventure of some sort. Ill take the buses out in every direction as far as I can go and then walk back to the center of town (pockets empty of course) Maybe ill go to the black market and spend a day at the entrance counting people. Maybe ill go to the state department store and see if anyone ever actually truly does buy the grand piano on the 4th floor that is different everytime I visit the building.

For some reason everything I do now seems like an amazing adventure…

The world was huge to me before I joined the Peace Corps….now its endless.

I only have a few final entries into this blog before I may bring it to an end. If I join Peace Corps again I may provide a link to my next blog or something but yea, this is not a trilogy…and further service is not a sequel. This tome of a blog read by myself and five other people will stand alone and on its own…

So, no more blog blow by blows, but i have a doosey in the chamber to present on June 11th when i wrap up 2 years of Peace Corps service so ill bring you up to speed a tad.

Since i last wrote school really really did wrap up this time. Kids are all out and gone now. Kids without work play basketball, and since it became June the Spring winds have died off at last, making the outside a truly wonderful place to lounge about on.

I got to see mom. She showed up to the airport via First Class and was the first off the plane with her friend Sheila. She was 50 feet away when she first saw me and she was already tearing up. My mom is quite the crier, happy crier but crier still! I was holding a sign that said "Crazy Mother Tour" and she was really letting it out. I shouted: "Your not allowed to freak out until you get out of the way of the foot traffic" I walked over to the side of the airport and mom hugged me and started to cry like mad. Full on, full blown crying. The type where you need to take pauses so you can breathe in deeper. Shed cry at my chest (i forgot how much taller i am than my mom) and shed look up, her face red and stained in tears and then just go back on to crying more. As this went on i had a view of the entire airport lobby...absolutely EVERYONE was looking at us. Seriously there were some people leaving the checking area who stopped to watch us. I just stood there smiling and happy. It was just great, everything i expected. I left my mother on the best of terms with nothing left unsaid, so to see her again...well all it brought was happiness. Good for me, and us.

So my mom flying via first class wasnt particularly uncomfortable or grungy as so many of us are when we fly cattle car (especially us tall folk) so with her and Sheila all doing fine (i had given the first day away to jet lag) i took her to the black market. On the busiest day of the year no less... okay so that was a bad idea, but it did mean i showed mom what UB really was like, not just the postcard pictures and stuff. Still, not smart really. Later that night despite being tired i made them stay awake to see "Altan Urag" at the restaurant. Another not so bright idea as her jet lag caught up to her. Didnt like it all that much, but i think it was just the jet lag talking. They were awesome as always.

Next day was a busy run of going to Bagakhangai and Erdene. The first thing that caught me off gaurd was that unlike me, my mother and Sheila were cold! The wind was doing what it always does, and my mom was not tempered to the weather as i am. Whops. So they saw the town, and my mom remarked on the ugly apartments and the outhouses and food available in the stores, and later she remarked it was at this point that... she finally really did believe me. My mom of all people knows i have been prone in my life to exxagerate certain conditions... and though she read about it all she liked it wasnt until your actually at the abandoned air force base looking at the ugly building and feeling that biting wind that you realize...yea this wasnt an act. This was everything i wrote down and a few details that you couldnt even begin to explain. Very cool

The meeting between my Mongolian and American mother was also a lot of fun. The parallels is staggering. It was also where i got to show off my Mongolian language skills as i acted as translater between my two moms.... hehe... i have two moms! It was at my mothers house that my american mom had her first ever Mongolian meal of Buuz. Couldnt quite say it right, but then again i didnt when i first got here either. Buuz were a little heavy for my mom, and the jet lag still threw her for a loop, but not all that bad actually.

So next i arranged for a bit of a big trip for my mother, Sheila and myself. Taking her just to the west of UB to a few travel spots even i hadnt been to before. Kharkorum, The White Lake and a herder camp. Five days, four nights and some camel and horse riding in between. Mom was terrified (i say that like thats unusual!) but Sheila and i strong armed her into it. It was the car that made the trip enjoyable. We were taking the Russian junkers. Those wonderful volkswagen looking thingys that look like they could withstand a nuclear fallout. In a space that usually held three it just held us. We loaded up on junk food and led by Baatar our driver off we went.

Camel riding.... meh, horses are better. You can control them a lot more and a camel really has no interest in you whatsoever. But since they kneel down it was much easier to get my mother atop one. Once up there we rocked our way out to a sand dune and click went all the cameras. Kharkorum was better... the ancient capital. Personally i enjoyed the Mongolian musisican we paid to hear later in our ger. Some dude (he said he was an air traffic controller!) could play all the musical instruments and throat sing. My mom and Sheila got a real royal treatment. It sounded absolutely amazing. I even got a video that i intend to conclude this entire blog with in a few weeks. Awesome and a true cultural moment even i hadnt had yet.

The White Lake was next. On our way we stopped at an old inactive volcano that once formed the Lake. Id never been here and it too was awesome! I actually climbed down into the funnel and got a picture taken showing just how big the thing is! Mom and Shiela took a more viewing angle! We reached the White Lake and Mom was thrilled that the outhouse actually had a seat to sit on..... oh and the lake was very pretty too! It actually was still partially frozen. We ate a little glacial water and were pretty sure that we were the only people at the White Lake. Seriously never saw another traveler during all of that... Private Lake, how nice. We tried fishing but came up empty, but the cold water of the lake helped us to cool our beer, so it worked out. It was also at the White Lake that my mom and Sheila got another culutral moment because i bought a Mongolian rock BBQ thingy. Click went the cameras... we had an amazing feast, and i taught them how to drink Vodka properly. Baatar and his friend were very impressed with my mom and her friend then.

On the way back there was endless amazing scenery, and all looked and was amazing. How cool indeed. I then put my mom on a train to China.....

...

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Ive traveled.... a lot. More than most, and my mother hasnt seen a site thats also in site of a beach...

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Ive been living less than a few hundred miles from it for over two years...

and somehow... my mother beat me to the Great Wall of China!!!!!!! Ah well... just strange is all.

After i got mom off safely i made my way back to Bagakhangai where i am now. On June 11th i leave Bagakhangai for the last time, and on June 20th this is all over.... At least this round.

Too many emotions going on to sort out. Its hard to pack, it really is. Not in terms of what to bring but realizing i wont be living in a ger anymore. Its... over?! So many others count the days, and i wonder where all of them went... wow.

Alright, lots more going on but is beezwax and its only got my name on it so we will leave it at that. This blog is almost at it end everybody (all three of you reading this)

This month is by far my favorite of the year. While not actually the summer, the mentality of the beginning of the great blossom is well underway. I am not referring to Peace Corps Mongolia either (though i love May in Mongolia too) but throughout all my 20's some of the best stuff has happened to me in May. Masters degrees, Peace Corps preparedness, getting in shape, getting amazing job offers, reaching the end of long and fruitful labors, the list goes on.

Today i looked at my email, and something very "Mayish" just happened. I refuse to believe it. Its just not gonna happen. Its a tease of something that i am so undeserving of, and therefore will not get. I am sure as the week goes on matters will clarify themselves, but the spark of something absolutely impossibly good suddenly was glowing a little bit. A possibility i would love. Something amazing, something i dont deserve in a million years. Nothing that will start a fire, but to even have the spark of hope of something as wonderful as this.... only the month of May could bring this about.

Wow, VAGUE!!!! (i know right?!) Ill let you know what it is when it doesnt pan out. (probably by next week) I am still a little too impressed to put down what it is right now. Now then lets see. Mom is here on Sunday. Running is going very well now that the wind is back to only 15mph, i am cooking great food (i still have way too much leftover food from care packages thanks to all my insane rationing) and all things good are still happening. Twenty seven days...and a life long goal comes to an end. A little over a month later, after spending a few days at a five star hotel in HK with my stepfather and a dear old friend (who speaks all the needed languages btw) ill be stateside, and even at 30 the whole world is laid out before me.... i love life!

Josh

Nothing really going on of late. School is over and the kids are running wild around outside in the bright sunny and warm weather. Good for them. Each passing day the countryside hills get a little less yellow and a little more green. I figure by Saturday ill upgrade the hills to full on green. The herders are all in good spirits as i run past them on my morning runs.

The past few days i hosted my first ever Couchsurfer. Very cool woman from New York who at 33 decided to finally get the whole "see the entire world" thing going. Good for her. She taught me to saute and i showed her the abandoned air force base. I even got to give her some pointers about travel she plans to do in Cambodia. It all went very well.

About 30 or so days and Peace Corps for me will wrap up. Mom drops in with her friend in a couple of weeks and i am trying to save a little bit of my money by staying at my site this weekend. That will work, and i can get some longer distance runs in.

So, i just got my third reference back in to the Peace Corps. This looks like its gonna happen. Ah..... Peace Corps..... round two! Most of the volunteers i know are counting the seconds until their service is ending. Not particularly unhappy with their service, but rather ready for it to be over.

For me, I don't think this is over. I want to do this again! I loved the last two years, in good times and hard times. I have the masters degrees already, zero debt, no real desire to settle, and though i am still waiting to hear from a few dream jobs (relax, i know i am not getting them, hence dream) i just don't see myself permanently back in the states just yet... I want to do this again.

I have even decided to seek out a launch date earlier than the start of 2012. I was thinking of sometime in September or so. The idea being to get back to the states, see everyone in the family, but not just sit and loiter in my moms basement. To really get right back into it after a month or two off. Yea, i like the sound of that. Of course, that means i will be missing yet another Thanksgiving with my family but i cant bring myself to modify my career interests for a single holiday. Nah, ill be there in spirit, but my body's going back into Peace Corps.

I actually looked over the Crisis Corps jobs. To those of you playing the home game that means that people who have already been in the Peace Corps can apply to short term emergency projects in various countries if they fit the criteria. ATM i couldn't really find anything of note in them, but ill keep my eyes open.

I wonder how the process will differ given that i am already in Peace Corps and whatnot. I imagine its not all that different, except the key to saving myself a couple thousand dollars is being sure my medical stuff from my current Peace Corps exam can transfer over to clear me once again. Here is hoping!

I think i feel similar to James Cook back in the 18th century. I wrote one of my thesis's on the guy. He too couldn't quite get the hang of a sedentary lifestyle. "I have a pressing urge... to go as far as any man has, or perhaps even can." In fact, i myself have a desire to serve on one of the many islands that James Cook explored in the Pacific. Actually his inability to stay put led to his death in Hawaii after a third tour of service... but then again i will probably be a little more ambitious after another round of service. Oceania would be a good place to have sort of an opposite experience as the one here in Mongolia, while at the same time many of the challenges that i have encountered and enjoyed overcoming would remain:

-exotic language

-completely different lifestyle

-unorthodox living arrangements

-unique education system/opportunities

-off the grid

Yea...that's sort of becoming my specialty.

So, ill wait for that interview! Ill probably need to make yet another blog if i do this again. Maybe ill quote Captain James Cook for the next one instead of Tolkein. Meanwhile ill savor the easy and enjoyable last month of my time in Mongolia.

May 11th 2011. UB Guesthouse, Mongolia.

“So wait, you only have one God? He’s all alone?!? He doesn’t even have a Goddess wife to #&*$?!? No wonder he is so vengeful!” –A pagan centurion arguing religion with a Jewish mercenary at a tavern.

Month 23 of Peace Corps service…. Yehaw! Mile 24 of a marathon so to speak… A month left. A time to run, drink, write, read and reflect.

ABC wrote another railroaded piece on rape in the Peace Corps. They told the story of a woman raped by a staff member and how she had to either have an abortion or quit Peace Corps. Lots more covered in the story, all of it once again one sided and making it sound like Peace Corps throws us to the wolves. Again, i would like to remark that i never realized just how powerful the media can be in influencing people until they started attacking an organization i am a part of. So many things to talk about, but the only thing im going to comment on is the issue of the abortion decision and who pays for it. Were the government, and yes, the government cant pay for abortions. (I can give you the names of the people who are responsible for that btw!) That is NOT a Peace Corps administration decision. Actually im pretty sure based on the personalities i have met that the overwhelming majority of the people working for the Peace Corps were very opposed to not being able to fund that, but that's the way it is. ABC is digging up the most tragic and awkward cases of 200,000 stories and only listens and reports on one side of the story. Listening to it and imagining what people who have no prequisite knowledge of the Peace Corps and how they must feel about this amazing organization that i not only served once and enjoyed but plan to do so again is an infuriating prospect!

You may have noticed that I am no longer giving a blow by blow daily description of my comings and goings here in Mongolia. Putting aside that the overwhelming majority of them are boring as all hell (as is much of what you come across when you do research in history btw)

Since I last punched in on this blog it snowed like mad….in the month of MAY!!!! Today my town is without power understandably given that the wind is howling by at around 35 mph and snow…well naturally snow doesn’t fall at that speed but rather shreds by. I guess this is payback for the pleasant and mild winter. Tomorrow its supposed to be sunny and 60 degrees outside. I love Mongolia.

I also brewed up some wine, taught classes half their usual size (some kids are being called away for countryside work at this point, others just don’t care,) and I also got my first couchsurfer request from a woman from New York tearing it up through India, Russia, and by the end of this week also Mongolia! She must have some amazing stories to tell!!! In essence, just another week in Mongolia, one of many I have chronicled, so I am skipping the long date by date blog this month so far.

I have also just decided to provide for the final few months some great in depth pieces instead. After all, this blog actually served more as a defense mechanism of losing myself in exile and required me to jot down things that I would later use when I wrote my book (currently in progress) but at this point, yea lets just take it one day at a time.

Were nearing the end of my service in the Peace Corps of Mongolia. Maybe it’s just that im 30 and things in my 20’s seem so utterly far away now, (even though I don’t feel old at all…you kinda had to know how I spent my 20’s) but yesterday I really tried to remember why I joined the Peace Corps. It wasn’t a defensive mechanism against current apathy, I just couldn’t quite remember why. Life can have that effect. You walk long enough and if your kept busy along the way you might forget why you were walking in the first place. A lifetime may feel like a blink of an eye but there’s periods of my life that feel as though they have gone on so long I sort of forgot how it all began. I think well outside my own head so I figure id use this entry to put some thoughts down as to maybe why.

The first REAL memory I can recall of the Peace Corps came when I had just turned 19 or 20. That’s just depressing as all hell now that I think about it. The Peace Corps should be the people that little 4th graders write letters to, not soldiers during Desert Storm. (okay, maybe they should write to both of us) When I was a kid in elementary school they gave us DAILY updates about that war, and at no point in 12 years of public school education did the words “Peace Corps” ever come up. Were the American government sponsored foreign volunteer program and unless you directly know someone you don’t find out about it until college I mean common!… I digress.

I remember watching “Six Feet Under” and hearing one of the characters dismiss someone’s noble idea in lieu of monetary gain by saying “If you want to help others, join the Peace Corps. If you want to help yourself you should sign with us then.” Yea…that really is the first time I remember hearing the word Peace Corps. I think I had heard of it before that but that’s the memory that really sticks for me. After I heard that I went online to read more about the Peace Corps. There wasn’t much to read. I was 19….this is….G.M. Chrysler…this is the year 2001!!! There was no such thing as blogs, hell at this point there was still no such thing as Google!!! Almost no one brought a computer to service, and the war stories to be told were in the form of books of reflection. So what I did have to read was the Peace Corps humble website. Back then you couldn’t even start your application process online; you had to call to request a packet. I put off making that call until I was 22. They sent the packet, and I came to terms for the first time with just how much this included. Luckily I was still WAY too immature to be thinking about going straight from College to Peace Corps and a Masters Degree was called for.

Two more years passed. There were some things that needed to happen if I was going to be a candidate for Peace Corps service. I needed to stop going to the therapist I had been seeing for so long. That was overdue anyway, the visits were monthly and a throwback to the teenage days when my ADHD was in hyper drive. A way to assure certain members of my family that I was perfectly fine. Additionally it was also time to get off the ADHD meds. (I took Ritalin before it was cool!) That also happened, and was for the best. It wasent like Garden State where I slowly “woke up” but instead I found myself refreshed that while I was still emotionally stuck around the age of 15, I lacked the previous degrees of obnoxiousness I once wielded. In fact this was the year that I started having difficulty forgiving myself for earlier acts of stupidity by myself. It was a growing moment for me, and one that if I had not been interested in Peace Corps Service I never would have gotten around to.

By the second year of my first Graduate school, that’s when I really started getting serious. My first time through Peace Corps medical clearance was quite stressful. Not the testing, in fact that was quite easy, but I remember the amount of work I was buried in at the time. I had just turned 25, and I was working an internship as a High School History teacher that I paid them to do! I was economically self sufficient at this point, but to make ends meet I was also working as a Resident Advisor to pay for my double wide (yes I lived in a trailer park as an RA, you can ask my friends David and Martha or my parents to verify that) Finally to pay for things like food and tuition, I was working in a computer lab at my University that I had been doing since I was a Senior in High School myself. Full time teacher, computer lab worker and RA…add to that that I had to pay for all the doctor bills for testing me and getting lab results and I remember what I was like in the Spring of 2006. I was absolutely stretched. I had grey hairs coming out of my head at the age of 25…I can still remember just how drained and burnt out I was, and I pray to the Sky Father that I never find myself like that ever again.

The graduation photos I have make me look like I had gone ten rounds with a UFC fighter on acid. My hair gray, my eyes dark and glazed, my skin pale and barren, and sore blisters broken out on myself. Even showered and shaved to look as good as I could every shot of me on my graduation day looked horrendous. I still look at that photo from time to time. It reminds me of how it can come to that, and how I must never let that happen to me ever again.

I went through the interview process and got cleared for a later Summer 2006 launch date. It all looked to be lining up very well…then something bad happened. Im not going into detail but let me tell you, it was bad. Like bad bad. I had never been the work hard, play hard type. I loved what I do and I did what I loved. At the start of the summer of 2006 I was hit by something so hard it shook me to my very core…I didn’t want to be a teacher anymore…. ever.

I told Peace Corps to put me on hold that summer for a little bit. I needed time to sort out how I felt. I asked them to consider me for a position some time the following year. That summer I also met the woman I love, which again complicated matters. Before I met her I had booked a trip to Thailand where I would train at a Muay Thai gym, meditate at a Buddhist Temple and try to put myself back together again. She broke off with her fiancée…and I flew for four months to the other side of the world...

I have made more mistakes in my life than I care to recall or count, but id make every last one of them a million times over if I could take that one back. I left the woman I loved. I remained devoted to her, I called her every second I could and I swore to the end of time that I would go straight to her when I got back in four months to be with her till the end of time

…and she went back to him…

In times of extreme drunkenness, when I have a hard time even telling up from down sometimes I can find a way to justify hatred of her for all of that. Like in some way that was actually her fault that the great love story of my life fell to pieces. The great tragedy is that I knew when I sober up ill be back to blaming the correct person for that, myself. Ill never forgive myself for that. Really I wont. I didn’t disappoint anyone but myself either. I didn’t know it at the time, but I loved her and I had chosen path that would lead to us splitting back apart. I write this a lot, and though I got the line of philosophy from a “Star Wars” book I still believe it.

“When you strip away the layers of your false illusions of assessment. When you stop caring about what all the unimportant people think (IE: Everyone but you) and you realize the only person you need to care about what they think about you is yourself…that was why it hurt so bad. I realized just how badly I let myself down.” I fucked up, I really…really fucked up.

Oh good gods listen to me??? Poor upper middle class heterosexual white boy whose heart is broke and had one bad break at an important time in his life? I had health, youth, people who cared for me, and a masters degree and zero debt. Over half the population of America would trade places with me let alone the rest of the world. I have no delusions. I am no better than half the tales of woe, if that! I know I just have the… well for lack of a better word ill say the “privilege” of being me. Yet when it is who you are. When this happens to you and you find yourself in the position you are…well I guess much like beauty…. misery is in the eyes of the beholder right? Buddha, you have so much to say to me about that, but you would probably just smile, and ask me to sit with you for a while….

My life got shook up a lot of ways in 2006. It was the worst year of my life, but through all that I now realize that 2006 made me into whom I am today. Pain is the fuel in the engine of change, and that was an inferno…I see that now, but I didn’t then. Even into 2007 I was still too deep into shock and anger about both incidents to really do anything. I spent that Spring verifying that I could enlist in Peace Corps in the summer of 2007 and working as a substitute teacher. I wouldn’t sign up to be a teacher. I didn’t have it in me, not after what had happened to me only six months ago. I sort of went into an epic fall during that time. I lived in my Mom’s basement, drifting in thought and drinking myself into a coma, waiting for there to be some magical cure to both of the great tragedies that had somehow hit me.

I was pathetic….It was the tactic of an infant. I sat there, and did nothing. I cried and wailed and kicked my feet like a baby waiting for an adult to come and care for me. In the end it became clear just how pathetic that was… someone punch me or something next time please!

Neither would be resolved, but at the start of the summer of 2007, something good happened. Something I didn’t deserve in a million years. It was just one of those most freak of accidents in which I somehow found myself offered an amazing job with the opportunity to improve myself both academically and personally. Once again I found myself pledging to reenlist for Peace Corps service in two years, but for right now I had a job at Fordham University…and off I went.

Those two years brought no resolution to either of the foundation shakers I suffered from. Instead those two years gave me perspective and reasons for new direction. I honed my administrative skills, and found a job I loved very much. Helping people in a way I never could have been happier about. In essence I found out through living the reason all of us still exist after our tragedies…. life just goes on. Yet though I loved my new job in the Fall of 2008 the Peace Corps bug hit me again. One of my fellow colleagues at Fordham University was a former PCV, and I knew that if I did not join the Peace Corps in the coming year something yet again would come between me and my desire to do that.

Now or never, and at long last I was ready. I left a job I loved to go do another job here that I love….but I did one final thing before I left. Something to sort of close a book rather than just turn a page. I got my confidence in teaching back…more than that through an appeal that I won I got back my desire to teach… I was a teacher again… I never healed my broken heart, but I got my confidence to teach back…. would have taken the other option instead but we don’t get to pick and choose in life.

During those three years of intermission I had started to read some of the first blogs of Peace Corps I could find. Many of them were VERY old and had been some ones journal that they had decided to upload afterwards. Something about how they wrote about there experiences was touching me. It wasn’t them describing their work, which was rarely if ever in my line. It just seemed to me that they all seemed so very happy, especially when they talked about their difficulties and their hardships. The idea that they didn’t care how they felt, they cared how others were feeling instead. It all just seemed so original of a thought process. Just before I left for service someone had the good sense of creating an archive for all the various blogs written by Peace Corps volunteers…and that brings us to me leaving for service in the Summer of 2009.

So okay….weve covered the HOW….but WHY???? Why the hell did I need to join Peace Corps so much?

I know I wanted to help. I still do. I probably always will. I like helping because the happiness you find in doing so is not overwhelming like taking a hot shower after two months without or drinking a glass of wine after so long without either. The happiness of that is so utterly temporary, and when you have running showers and two buck chuck at your disposal that which makes you happy suddenly wont do the trick anymore. When I teach or help a school club its not like I need to teach more or do more the next time to get that good feeling from it. Its like I am aware that right then and there I could be doing the exact same thing and thirty years from now it will bring me the same amount of joy that I get from it now. So yea, I like helping…but I could do that in a non-Peace Corps manner. Heck I left a job where I was helping to do this one. So while I think it’s a good reason to join the Peace Corps I don’t think it’s the reason I joined the Peace Corps.

I have a traveling streak in me for sure. There’s hundreds of countries and around seven billion people on the globe, and they all have amazing stories and interesting lives that are so unique that I could dedicate a lifetime to learning about only a few of them, and yet I want to meet as many as I possibly can. By joining the Peace Corps I certainly traveled to the other side of the world. As there is a 12 hour time zone difference between where my worldly possessions are in America and where I live now I was indeed taken to the other side of the world. During the two years I have lived here I have lived in a town of 2000 people who all shared with me their encounters in life and I learned much about many. Yet then again having moved to Mongolia I am about as stationary as I have ever been. I have walked into the rolling Russian steppes in every direction from my town and found only more space. There was only more vast emptiness of person and thing. I mentioned once that the world was built for beings much grander than us humans. A world of titans of sort, but for two years I in essence have lived in a small town. So no I didn’t join the Peace Corps to travel, even though I got to travel.

I definitely found something to believe in behind the goals of the Peace Corps. To assist those in need, to spread awareness of Americans to those throughout the globe, and to bring our experiences back to Americans. Very noble goals, and ones that I will say took me by surprise as to how much I have done of each.

Basketball courts are built. Over one hundred fifty kids are now in possession of laptops with access to the Internet. Meaning kids who don’t have textbooks now can Google Earth my address or read this blog or read news events about countries they had never even heard of. I helped to teach kids English. Not just amphoral memorized speeches either, by interacting with a native English speaker such as myself students are now able to better understand how English sentences sound and are formed, making future self study far more useful and productive. The various English clubs I managed subtle though it will be are of use to them in promoting both their understanding of language, and also the promotion of their careers. Most importantly, I think I demonstrated through living in my town and my community that Americans are not what they see on tv. Were not gun toting sexaholics with Hummers and buried in wealth. I demonstrated that not all tall white American men will travel to a country and instantly marry a pretty girl half her age (not all the time anyway) and just all around I showed that Americans are just like Mongolians, who do small crazy things slightly different like run recreationally and don’t always cut their hair…

Let alone all that I have learned about what it means to live off three dollars a day and the value of clean water and heat. I learned about just how truly little you actually need, and to enjoy just how much you actually have. I intend to take all this back with me to America, and those I interact with will benefit from it as well. So that could be a good thing, but when I think back to November 2008…wow that’s a long time ago. That one evening in the Office of Residence Life at Fordham University when I had just triple copied my incident report paperwork and I leaned over to a former volunteer named Anthony and asked “dude do you think I would do well in the Peace Corps?” the goals of the Peace Corps were not known to me. So while I think the goals of the Peace Corps were a good reason, I don’t think it’s the reason.

This also was an exile. Exile… there is something about that word that I am drawn to. Sometimes I think the reason that I live the way I do now is because its an exile. One that I can continue to promote….pretty much for as long as I choose. The idea that you reach a point in the society you live in that you understand or at least comprehend the way of things… and to give all of that up, and to forsake it for a part of the world filled with others who have their own society that differs so greatly from yours. I didn’t join specifically to go into exile but I knew entering Peace Corps that it would be something I looked forward to about it. I found the quietest, loneliest, emptiest corner of nowhere to live out a part of my life in a new way. Exile… a great thing about this experience, but not the reason why.

….i don’t remember. I have no specific reason why I joined the Peace Corps now that my service is nearly at an end. Come to think of it I am pretty sure I don’t know if I had an absolute reason why in the first place. Instead I look at my interest and desire to be a Peace Corps Volunteer as this. There are so many productive ways to live out your life. Some teach, some are doctors, some are civil engineers, some pick lemons on a kibbutz, some are poets, some help the meek, some are porn stars, some sell furniture, some work in offices, some are counselors…and we are all doing the things that we do because even after we realize that we don’t have a defining reason…we still want to do the things that we do.

I once wrote that helping is not a race. Your not supposed to be able to quantify help. It’s a process that never ends and has no real ultimate goal. The idea is that Peace Corps was formed at a time when we tried to create “The Great Society” which got thrown for a loop as time went on, but I think when you realize that “The Great Society” was not a reachable goal you find out the point. It’s ever sought for, never disappointed, and constantly changing. Contribute however you like, I spent two years of my life trying to help as a Peace Corps Volunteer.

I joined the Peace Corps because for two years of my life I found joy in what I was going to be doing during it. I might find the same happiness doing it again in another country or I might find it back in the states, or helping flood victims or who knows what. Theres no bad ways to live out your life, the great tragedy is that many live out lives they don’t want or wont be happy with. Everyone following?

Once you stop caring what everyone else thinks about you and you start to care about the opinion of the only person that matters (yourself) you come to terms with just how much you are meant to accomplish, and just how dedicated you need to be.

I joined the Peace Corps because if I had not done that when I did I would never have forgiven myself. I already don’t forgive myself for something else, and I don’t think I could take the burden of something else as well.

“Its far better to live with the regret of doing something you wish you hadn’t than living with the regret of having not done something you wish you had….”

…that’s a good original quote of mine. I am sure some who took the chance and ended up in a different set of circumstances might disagree but I still stand by that.

May 3rd 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So….COS conference. It was….awesome! So it began on Saturday when I trekked into UB. The weather was warm, the wind was light and somehow if I looked down the right city street at the right angle I could occasionally see rare moment s where I even thought a few corners of Ulaanbaatar was rather nice looking. Good for it.

The weekend was a flurry of food and showers. With only 2 months of service remaining I am definitely liking to shower more and more. Considering I had spent the last three weeks sober and therefore running every day I had plenty of dirt and salty stuff in my hair. This was also a weekend when everybody from the M20 group was in. Two years. If your healthy and optimistic that’s about a 50th of your life. You can learn everything you want to know about someone in under an hours conversation but at the same time at the end of two years those who have shared in their trails and tribulations can still leave you wishing you had gotten to know them better. Its just the way it is I suppose.

Yet the weekend before the COS conference was lost to warm weather, gentle winds, and beers on Amsterdam Café’s patio and the large corner table in the Ikh Mongol bar (we know which one im talking about!) I have been so happy and priveledged to work and live with these fellow amazing Americans of mine.

But on Monday things started to get a little less fun and a little more official. First up for me on Monday was the dentist. You might think they would pinch pennies on medical care once your actually in the Peace Corps but actually that’s not the case at all. Actually, it gets a little tougher once you got in! The dentists office was all PCV’s and one by one through the afternoon they worked us through. Some took ten minutes…others were strapped to the chair for three hours and would need to come back for later work. When I got called up I took a deep breath and walked in.

I had a secret weapon, I really did. I had spent the last year flossing. Not sportatically either. Night in night out I had taken that annoying string and whittled my teeth. I still remember the blood from the first two weeks too. Made me fear for my teeth in the autumn years of my life too! Yet two times brushing teeth and a nightly flossing really should keep cavities away right?! Alas, all the dental hygene in the world is no match for my love of soda, and all around crummy genes…. Two cavaties. They would handle those next Friday, but now it was time for the cleaning. That dentist…that 75 pound Asian lady practically strattling my chest as she dug to the atom along my gums and teeth….she was a full blown SADIST! Some people literally pay women to abuse them. Why the hell don’t they just go to the dentist??? She…I know you cant violate someone in that way but I cannot for the life of me believe she had to be that forcefull on my teeth….

Then after about an hour of this she sits me up, takes off her mask to a beautiful and kind smiling face with what I imagined to be sharpened layers of shark teeth and said to me in Mongolian: “See you in a week!” Damn you lousy teeth!

Well I spent the afternoon convalescing with my own drug of choice: a beer on a warm balcony. The next day was medical. The rumours abounded about the possibility of a prostrate exam during our medical checkup. For the first time in my life as a wild controversy was hashed out about an upcoming event that our deliberation had no deciding factor in the manner whatsoever, I spent my time just sitting quietly and drinking my beer. It….was…SO out of character! Any other time id be throwing in baseless statements on the subject but for the first time in my life I didn’t believe or had heard it from another person. I knew….bedrock knew…that noone who is not displaying symptoms gets a prostate check until the age of 50. Espeically when your demographic is overwhelmingly 20 somethings. I could have offered that into the conversation….but dammit it was just too much fun to listen to!

So the next day I arrived at the ass crack of dawn for the medical along with about a dozen or so other volunteers. It was a snails pace but unavoidable, it is what it is and by all means be thorough when you tell me if I am healthy or not. First we were told to pee in a cup, then we sat around a while as the doc did a round of bodies. Finally I got called up to check eyesight. Four years away from a single eye surgery and my impossibly far sighted astigmatism is still at perfect 20/20. (Dr. Kim at Duke University. Best of the best everyone!) Then they weighed me. I am four pounds heavier than when I began Peace Corps. I blame the beer and pizza from last night, the three days running absence while in UB, and just good ole fashioned “I am now 30.” Was complimented that I look healthy though on the outside. My doctor was actually a nurse. Kinda a secret kept from us PCV’s is that these guys aren’t docs, but kick ass nurses instead. (Good job for my mom to keep in mind, she would love to be stationed in the Caribbean no doubt!)

So I sat there in those stupid white patient gown thingys and she got to work. Arms responsive, chest clear, pressure tests positive, whisper tests proved that I could hear, blood pressure of that of a marathon runner (low) and a scan of the eyes. Then the basics: “How much vodka have you chugged down?” “How many sex partners?” “How often with condoms” “Still not smoking?” That type of stuff. For me it didn’t matter because as I may be reenrolling to be a PCV again I needed new results on all the medical stuff Peace Corps requires of a new blood. So….after a thorough physical they sent us to get blood and more urine drawn from a clinic to test for STD’s.

The clinic they send us to… its top notch and all that, but it really is on the other side of town. Not in a mood for a taxi (haven’t taken one since my birthday) and since it was a beautiful day I started walking. On the way I bumped into a number of other volunteers going to get the same blood and urine thingy. So we go there, get in line *again by “line” I mean that all Mongolians went before us and when noone was left the three Peace Corps volunteers at the clinic got to have it done too. By the by, ill save everyone the suspense by saying that I was negative for all the bad stuff and positive for all the good stuff, but this place needed a week to get all the results back. I guess if one of us suspected that we had an STD they could rush the results or something but anyone even with a light dose of paranoia can dislike week waits on results like those.

My mother gave me two wonderful gifts. The first being as a nurse she instilled upon me the horrors of STD’s at a very young age ensuring that I would take every precaution on the planet on those rare ocassions when I do indeed have sex. The second being a healthy dose of paranoia in things regarding my health and other suspenseful things. So yea, much like when I got tested to get into Peace Corps years ago the odds of me having anything were astronomically low…but … well paranoia needs only the seed of possibility to exist to thrive.

So with med stuff done me and two other volunteers set back towards the Peace Corps office. We took the wrong bus back (in all fairness the bus mislabeled itself) and instead of heading into town it took us out to the ger districts north of town. We sorta let it go on longer than we should have let it too, but we PCV’s are stubborn in nature. When it was decided that this bus was not “looping” but going out and back we got off and backtracked, but by that time we were high up in the hills north of town. The ger district in UB is not a pretty site. Half a million people living in one story shacks and tiny gers that are all grey thanks to the endless puffing of coal stoves which also leaves residents of this area with terrible health problems as during the winter living in this region is the equivalent of a daily pack of cigarettes just breathing the air!

The graveyard for Ulaanbaatar is there too. A graveyard in Mongolia is not a pretty site either. Mongolians don’t like death all that much, in fact very few people related to a deceased family member even go to the burial at all. To see one where people have literally built their homes around an enclosed ground that has mere disfigured stones jutting out of it…lets just say my desire to be cremated and scattered still stands. (I told mom she can just throw me anywhere that works for her…I imagine she would turn it into a cruise vacation of sorts or something!)

Well after finally getting back to Peace Corps office various volunteers were all in various stages of their medical stuff, but that meant aside from a language test I would be taking AFTER the Close of Service Conference (hereby after referred to as COS) so once again I just planted myself at American Burgers and Fries and started eating and drinking. I was supposed to work with a fellow filmmaker named Allison on the COS slideshow the two of us had been gathering pictures for but we somehow found a way to procrastinate that vital thingy. In all fairness the beer was very good! I actually even got to bump into a fellow PCV I hadn’t seen in a while. A great guy who shall remain nameless because of the humiliation of what happened next is something he may wish to keep to himself. We were MANY beers in at AB+F and I was very aware that one more would be too many. But he and a fellow volunteer were not yet done so they waved me goodbye. That might have been the last I heard of it, but at 6am the next morning my phone went off with him on the other line. He was staying at my guesthouse and I was still a little drunk/hungover from the night before so I sorta imagined I heard wrong when he said “hey dude, can you come to the other side of the guesthouse and give me a shoulder to walk with. I gotta go get in a cab to the Peace Corps office…I think I broke my foot.” Well after getting over to his side of the guesthouse yes indeed his foot was completely useless and after some shuffling we got him into a cab. Apparently after a few more beers when I had left he himself was walking home and…he decided to start skipping. I mean as in what seven year olds do just skip skip skip to my loo type skipping. Well I imagine the alcohol didn’t help and one skip just went terribly terribly wrong… hell of a bad time to hurt your foot (consolation prize: I believe he gets to fly back to the states first class when he does wrap up Peace Corps.) Bad luck that is, Anyway…

The next day we all packed up for COS… We left at 7 in the morning from the Peace Corps office in two smallish vans. It used to take a commercial sized bus to cart all of us around. But were down to around 40 by now. Depressing in some ways, but the smaller ground definitely made us a tight nit group. The ying and the yang…the great wheel. Allison and I stood at the entrances to the two buses and clicked away photos for our slideshow “before and after” segments. More on that later.

So off we go through UB traffic. There is no rhyme or rhythm to Mongolia traffic. In one of the least densely populated areas of the world somehow they concentrate enough cars in a small enough space to make getting out of town an hour long adventure. Once out of town naturally the roads were empty. We were headed sort of Northish to a ger camp called “Secret History of the Mongols” Never been there, but ger camps are pretty easy to get the hang of. Two boring hours later we get there and sign into gers…

I had just signed up randomly, and so once everyone was settled in turns out that I was rooming with the only other dude not in a click. A 70 year old dude named Michael. By far one of the oldest PCV’s serving in Mongolia. This dude had done Peace Corps back in the 60’s and was back for more. We have many badasses in many shapes and forms in Peace Corps Mongolia…but his is the type that would take a lifetime to accomplish the rank of. Kick ass roommate!

The COS conference was unlike our other conferences. This was not about what is to come, this was mostly for us to let it all out. To really think back on all we did. I get why they do this. After two really tough years of Peace Corps service one of the most common reactions is to feel frustrated that you haven’t really done anything. This conference helped to demonstrate just how much we had actually done. The food was also top notch too!

The first night was a lazy night. Just a single bottle of wine and a few quiet ger secluded hangouts. Alison and I pulled up our sleves and really got some of the photos into place. The production was truly a duo partnership as we were using my computer to actually piece the video together and we were using Alisons computer software to make some of the more complex shot thingys. Alison and I have very different filming styles. She likes to make videos that are of others doing, with very little involved time on the camera. As you may have noticed from some of my videos I on the other hand have no problem getting right up into the camera while filming my movies. The partnership was benefitial to all as it allowed the movie to be both all inclusive and also very irreverent. An excellent partnership!

The second day of the conference was much like the first, with segments on how to apply to GRE’s and Grad Schools once Peace Corps service ends. I love to learn and I still may try for a doctorate in Education if certain things work out, but boy howdy I am glad I don’t have to worry about that stuff because I already finished it! Some of their advice was mildly contradictory, but I got what they were going for. The whole “yes it will be tough…but I mean common you just lived in a tent for two years now here are some resources” type peptalks.

As we got ready to do the awards show and the slideshow I pulled out my secret weapon. I had brought over from my Germany trip a top of the line bottle of the little known but loved by those who do Jagermeister…it was hit and miss, but those that loved that stuff sure the hell loved me. The bottle of Jameson Whiskey I had also brought was popular as well, but as I had never drank Jameson before much of that went my way.

So first we had the awards ceremony, spearheaded by fellow 20’s Wally and Hannah. They made one for each of us with certificates to boot. They were a riot! Best part about them was that we knew, all of us in that room knew that the ONLY people on the planet would find this funny except for the exact people in this room. It’s the type of thing you just cant recreate at any other place and time. Unique and funny as hell. My award:

::drum roll:::

“Most Entusiastic Ger Dweller!”

Yea….i was a total ass, complete moron, and it took a lot of second impressions to prove that I wasent a total choad….

BUT I LIVED IN A GER!!!!!!

The other awards were all hilarious as well, but like I said unless you knew the people none of them make any sense.

The slideshow happened next. Seventeen minutes of endless laughter and heckling. There was some great music involved in the video, but really you couldn’t hear anything over the laughter and cheering. We didn’t bring down the house…but everyone in that room thought that video rocked. Ellen our Country Director even grabbed a copy of the movie too. More requests came and an assurance that it would be on youtube quickly placated everyone. How do you put “makes kick ass youtube videos” sound professional on a resume?

That night…it snowed. Last day of April and it REALLY snowed. Probably more than it had all this winter combined. Were high up in the hills of a distant ger camp and we need to trek back to UB. Though after two years of hard times this one was a cakewalk. We gathered our things and headed down the hill to the main road area which the vans could reach. It even required the manly men at one point to get out and push. A great flashback to January of 2010 for me…this time done with fellow volunteers. I love my life.

The wind was brutal and the snow still fell in huge amounts. But off we went. At one point we stopped to pee. I had never peed in the countryside with such winds and…something cool happened. I put my back to the wind, so the only wind that hit my urine was halfway down, but the amazing thing….it didn’t hit the ground. Seriously the wind was strong enough to scatter it out and up before it hit the ground. Thirty seconds of peeing and I left the ground dry. I love this country.

Luckily as we drove south the snow became rain, and we could use a little rain this time of year, especially after the nightmare winter of last year. We unloaded, booked it back to the guesthouse. I took my language test the following morning. I didn’t study for this or anything. Language has come up a lot during this blog. Language is the thing that has divided people far more than need be. Heck if you read the bible (as I did earlier this year) one of the ways God stops people from working together is to make them all speak different languages. Mean dude…mean!!!! So sitting down next to a woman who started to talk to me…something happened. Something amazing. I just…spoke to this woman. I didn’t want to buy anything, I wasent talking about school, I wasent complaining about something. I just…talked…in Mongolian. It all came so easily to me. I said everything I wanted to say, and I said it correctly too! 25 minutes later we wrapped up and I walked out. Not a word of English. I was told (in Mongolian) id find out my test results on Monday.

We all met later the next day at American Burgers and Fries. There was one final task for all of us to do.

The man who runs American Burgers and Fries is named Rob. Hes an American actually though Asian and he went to the High School I used to teach at. I love this world. The restaurant he runs has burgers that would rival Five Guys, and he opened in the winter of 2009, meaning the M20’s turned it into the official hangout spot. He’s always been good to us, and we bestowed on him a special honor. Probably the first time its ever been done too! We had all shelled out a thousand tugriks, and had gone to a sports store that makes trophies and plaques. With the ENTIRE remainder of the M20’s we presented to Rob a plaque making him an honorary M20. I still remember the look on his face. We could have offered him a thousand dollars and he would have taken the trophy.

That night was something special to us as well. While many of the M20’s leave around the end of June, it was at that restaurant that very night that we realized a lot of the people we knew and loved we were not going to cross paths with again. That this was the last hurrah of the gang. We drank accordingly, and though there was little left unsaid, we said it all and more. What a wonderful world.

Alas, by Sunday it was all over. Time to go back to Bagakhangai. It’s the first time that I had spent a prolongued time in UB and didn’t feel a particular urge to leave. I know it was the company I was in but still…that’s saying something. I got back easily enough and found that the rain had gotten into my ger a little. My items near the center of the ger were now somewhat wet. Ah well…good to be back.

That brings us to today, where I got the results of my language test. I scored and Advanced Low. I knew I did well, but not that well. After the advanced level you reach Superior and with something like that you could work for the United Nations with your language abilities. Like I said I don’t see myself using Mongolian for a career…but that just rocked. I hadn’t accomplished something, I hadn’t made someone else think higher of me. I had made myself proud of what I had accomplished. That…is the most important person of all. The only one that matters and they are your harshest critic. I think I am learning a lot while living in Mongolia.

So in the coming days I find out more about what will be occupying the next few years of my life….again. This time im not worried. So many good options, so many possibilities, and after living in Mongolia for two years doing what I have done I am pretty damn sure I could make anything work.

Life is good….Life is really, really good.

Wow...they have been hunting that guy for a third of my lifetime. For some reason i never though we would actually get him too...

wow...

Nothings really changed, but something that had to happen for a long time actually did finally happen huh....

Ill write about the COS conference tomorrow....

April 8, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well, short week. I am okay with that for the first of the last four. Actually im not here for the last week so…wow I only have 2 real weeks of teaching left….its not sinking in I don’t think. This second year has moved along at ludicrious speed. Truly I blinked and we went from October to March. Hardest month of the school year? By far January, Easiest? I would say that whole October/November time when I was learning to diversify my cooking and I could still recreationally go outside. I was playing basketball with kids until the second week of November this school year. Wow…

So I had a videoconference job interview with my ole alma matter last night. It was 10pm my time and 10am their time. It was funny having the conference in a place I knew and had been in before. There have been a few A/V additions since I left but it did bring back memories. I put a really good foot forward and I really would love to have this job. I do what I love and I love what I do, and this is where I know I would thrive the most. Yet alas, I am here and they are there…it may come down to just that.

So its 5pm and I usually leave the school by now but today I don’t want to leave, for there will be no internet this weekend and the 50+ weather does not kick in until Monday. No matter, my stepfather sent me a package with some new books. Some good looking Sci-fi….and Bridgete Jones Diary…. My stepdad is all for jokes and so am I, but I am not quite sure whats funny about this aside from being a girls book and I am a guy. Must be a “He’s so bored I bet he will even read this!” type thing….i will probably.

Boring looking weekend up ahead. After my 12 day German thing ive chosen to remain sober until the Close of Service conference. Three reasons, the first being having tasted the liquid of the gods themselves I will not sully my tongue with vile brews of the yellow alcohol nature in Mongolia nor the dark fires of vodka. The second being a month of exercise and getting my body fit for the summer months. Hanging up the sauce will give me little else to do after all. I shall be returning stateside thin and trim and tough! Finally, the start of May will be when the beer tents in Ulaanbaatar open, and as school closes around that time and Mom doesn’t show up until the end of the month ill have plenty of time to spare with those, and the beer tents at least serve Gem and Bavaria, which is infinitely more passable of a beer than Borgeo or its equivalent. Given that I am not going to drink this month and the sizeable amount of money I have stored up in the Khan bank account I have….well, May and June are going to be some golden summer months!

As for this weekend… No problem, clean the ger, cook, run, type the story….just like the good ole days. I miss Civilization IV, or any computer game for that matter! First thing to buy when I get back stateside!

April 9, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Stupid wind! It’s the most beautiful day outside but the wind today is really one of those spring type breeze things. The type of wind that if this was the desert would flay the skin off your flesh if you stayed outside long enough. As for me it merely means that I am barely able to run at all and that I cant just lounge around outside and maybe play with the kids in the park. No matter, got my ger all nice and clean at least. Tomorrow I hope to get a good hour or two run in if the wind dies down.

April 10, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

More wind, more running, more sun, warmer weather and an all around happy weekend off the grid. Tonight I will use the last of my cheese to make a good grilled cheese sandwich and ill top it off with a liter of orange juice. Life…is….good….

There is something very strange about me. Just over a week ago I was in a state of intoxication for pretty much 12 days straight, and I didn’t wean off, go through a withdrawal or anything. One day the end of a bender, the next day stone sober as though all I drank in Germany was tea and exercised. Naturally the lack of calories from beer has made me lose weight but all in all I really cant feel any particular difference at all between how I was and how I am now. I don’t deserve the degree of flexibility and versatility my body provides for me. It just somehow all came together that way and even at the age of 30 I still party like a rockstar one minute and the next minute work like mad and run like the marathoner that I am. Ill take that trait over something artificial like wealth or social skills any day of the week.

So this week of school looks to be pretty routine. 2nd to last week of official teaching for me. I imagine ill be doing some informal teaching in May but nope, the second to last week of April and we wrap this all up in a bow. A fellow PCV who I trained with over 2 years ago named Allison did something absolutely kick ass. We are doing a final slideshow for the M20 group to be shown at the COS conference, and though Allison is becoming a PCVL and will be staying a third year and as the higher ranked person was assigned the task of creating the video she was actually kind enough to offer to have the two of us work on it together. We have already begun to set up the email to receive all the PCV’s pictures and before the conference we are gonna take the before/after photos of the training groups and the whole M20 group. Really? Where the hell did the second year go?

April 11, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia

Month 22 in Mongolia. I am running out of ways to express how quickly time has flown this second year, so ill add in something that sounds even more encouraging. Its easily over 50 degrees today and starting next week its supposed to be around 60 or 70. With weather like that….naturally I could make use of this very very well. The wind even looks to be dying down in the coming days. I predict the sea of green before we even hit May! Naturally this means that there will be some random and dramatic temperature drop, but hey im in too good a mood to care.

I think one of the reasons I remain a little sleepy during the day is that I haven’t drank any coffee or soda in over a week either. This is quite monumental, for any of the Jacobs/Matthews bloodline come to think of it. Its meant a lot more juice and water instead. That’s good for me, I just gotta get into the habit of it. Its tricky, but the warmer weather also makes me open to the idea of turning over a new leaf.

April 12, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Whoops, forgot a small little aspect of the warm weather. There really is nothing I can think of to complain about the weather being warm this year. The cold was wonderful, just long enough, and though the wind is strong it’s a gentle fan breeze compared to last year. There is however something that happens when the weather gets warm that I forgot happens.

Drunk men go outside… I hate that part. Its not the warm weathers fault, but dammit yea. During the winter the drunken men go and buy their vodkas and then find the apartment or ger in which the husbands wife is not present and get full on drunk, but at the very least because of the cold they tend to stay secluded to that one location. Now with warm weather they can buy the bottle, go home and drink it with their friends…and then go outside and harass the foreigner.

Drunken Mongolian men also have this one really annoying thing they do where they shake your hand and then try to lightning fast yank your whole body. I don’t understand the goal of this, but it has happened enough times now that I am pretty sure it’s a common thing. Now luckily I am tall, strong and man. I try to imagine being half my size and weight and a woman, and I can see how this goes from annoying to dangerous.

I took a long way back to my ger to avoid a crowd of drunks sitting nearby the well…ah well, if that’s the worst the warm weather brings I say bring it on. Today its just under 70 degrees and theres hardly any wind at all, bring it on!!!

April 13, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

There is a significant difference between being original and being creative. Original means it comes from no other source than yourself while being creative can mean taking some idea that already exists and modifying it to creating something new of your devising. Some may even argue that given that we are subtly influenced by everything around us that nothing these days may in fact be “original” but the point I am making is that while I lack certain original qualities, if you show me a good thing I can promise you that if you give me two or three other cool things I can turn them into a hybrid that blows them all out of the park.

Last year my big thing was taking film and television shows that I had at my disposal and mixing them with cool music to make montage music videos. “House of Flying Daggers” “Twilight” “Balls of Fury” “Buffy/Angel” the list goes on…that habit sort of faded off when I had more work to do and internet to distract me, and given how geeky some of them are I have wisely only published one of the montage videos I created.

Today though, after a 10k run I did something creative I have been meaning to do for months, actually pretty much since I moved to my ger. I have made a Green Acres themed Ger song….and its good! So fellow amature film Guru and M20 Allison who I trained with I will help incorporate this into the Close of Service Slide Show for the M20’s. I personally am making my own movie about my own private experiences and I will likely use the video in both movies, and tonight I do the editing…

Fun day!

April 14, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

I did something foolish today. Whenever I have internet handy a good way to pass some time between classes is to go to the peace corps journals website where I can read all manner of stories and blogs from PCV’s both within Mongolia and without. It also contains a great deal of information regarding news events having to do with Peace Corps. When ABCNews did that absolute railroad piece on us the journals website was nice enough to publish the Peace Corps report on all major crimes that have happened to volunteers in the last 15 years while in service. Considering both where we work and the relativity of crime in some of these countries its actually not that bad. But in one morning to read 15 years of terrible crime histories that have happened to PCV’s…well lets just say I am glad both to be a man, but also to live in a town that really is pretty crime free.

I really don’t have a good reason for why I haven’t been robbed on one of my adventures though. Aside from stopping the odd pickpocket here or there I really have had noone try anything on me, be it robbery or assault or anything nefarious at all. I drink a lot, travel alone, I look like I could be rich on occasion… I guess providence has taken me for a pet in some circumstances such as this.

Now having written that, I have a whole summer in which to get robbed or assaulted and having successfully jinxed myself, but you get the idea. I don’t recommend reading that crime report btw. It shows just how much Peace Corps follows through on crime but it just REALLY is hard to read in one sitting!

Ive been sober close to two weeks now and I have been running five miles a day every day during that time too. Its impressive how a few degrees of weather and a little less wind can really get me to pound some pavement.

April 15, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So it turns out my school is going to extend its school year past May 1st this year. Its so different teaching in Mongolia. The idea of rules or policy just really is not here. Check that, its all here and written down on paper…and noone even reads the damn thing. Each town and city and specific school just goes on about its business like it is the one and only deciding voice on the matter. Only in a Mongolian town can a teacher “just not come in” without anyone even batting an eye…

This is not me complaining by the way. I obviously don’t have all that much to do these days so it I may as well teach right? It will give my daytime some structure as I reach the final two months of my time in Mongolia. I do imagine though that much like last year at Ondortolge a good number of teachers are just going to start giving classes all around a “miss” or at the very least phone it in. Classroom numbers will also begin to thin for two reasons. Some kids will be outside playing hooky because its far too nice outside and some will be headed out to the countryside to help with the chores of keeping the livestock alive and well.

I think for next week ill be taking it light. I got a final few episodes of Samurai Jack that I can show the kids, ill do that. Tomorrow the weekend begins and once again for a few days ill be off the grid. Good, give me some time to run longer and soak up some sun and peace and quiet from the rambunctious school. The stores got a new batch of peppers and tomatoes so a good salad over the next few days will be a good substitute for being sober. Will say this though, only ten days off alcohol and running everyday and already my body is looking awesome once again. Go metabolism go!

April 16, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Weekend sobriety is a lot harder to keep than weekday sobriety. It’s the extra time no doubt. Drinking because I am bored. Well good, boredom is something that can usually be cured!

I wanted to buy a few beers and just start walking out into the hills like I did over the summer, but I settled for orange juice and just sort of walked around. It was pleasant and nice, nothing too special. Bruschetta and salad for dinner. Its too windy to run today (its about 20mph outside) so tomorrow ill take a good 2 hours getting around 12 or 13 miles in…I am going to start the summer off looking hot as all hell. I just hope the beer tents at the State Department store don’t hog all my time. I was sort of glad to hear I would be teaching a little bit of the month of May. Gives me a reason to stay put and stay on my exercise program.

Boring Saturdays….

April 17, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

So….heres something interesting. Since I have gotten back from Germany I have been in sleeping in my ger for the last two weeks. My yard mother is a teacher at the school and I see her and my yard is teeming with broken down cars and vans, one of which is literally propped against the side of my ger. I keep getting this wonderful dream image of the weight finally just snapping through my ger structure when im asleep…but anyways.

So I have been here in the yard alone for the last two weeks. I mean ALONE… Neither my mother, father or younger brother have been in the yard during this time. I know they were separated but usually one sleeps in the ger and one sleeps at a neighbors… Theories naturally abound. Most likely my father is on some long term mechanical project outside of town and my younger brother is living with relatives in UB as my mother is simply finding the floor of an apartment with company more enjoyable than an empty ger.

Mongolians don’t like being alone. Alone is directly associated with depression in this country. Now my town is progressive enough to grasp the concept that yes maybe the tall white foreigner actually likes to not be bothered every single minute of the day but Mongolian by default will usually find a way not to spend much time by themselves.

It does mean though that I literally have my own yard for my final few months of service. How unique! Seriously I am just one guy who has his own little world to reside in. I love my ger, I really do. I bitched and moaned so much about it last year nothing would have been more ironic than if I hated the experience, but here I am having loved every day I got to sleep in this glorious round tent I called home. Its truly the one and only place in the world that people put these things to use, a testament to their usefulness to still be in service for millennia after millennia!

So to pass the time today I went out early before the winds kicked in and I ran for 2 hours. Just under a half marathon. One hour out, one hour back no food and only a half liter of water. When the run was over I felt almost no different than when I began…gods damn its good to run and even more hot damn its good to be in shape!

April 18, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Power outage in my town today. No rhyme or reason, certainly not from a storm or anything. No matter, it’s a nice day outside and this gives me a reason to write my book and to play some Wizardry.

Speaking of my book. Remember how I am calling it “Three Shots of Vodka” in honor of the far more epic tale of “Three Cups of Tea” Turns out that book may become the next “Million Little Pieces” Wow….theres just no real story is there…

Oh yea, a NES emulator/mod has been developed for the timeless game of wizardry, in which I am fighting to get my character up to a ninja!.

April 19, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

The construction crew is back. The second school currently being built that will be up and running for the next PCV now has its construction crew hard at work. Absent during the last six months due to the cold weather and the like they set up a construction sleeping ger and have gotten right back to work. That’s nice, means that the semi-cool weather must be here to stay and the like! Tuesdays are boring. I don’t really get to teach all that much and the office is jam packed with people doing a whole lot of nothing, including little babies who need to work on their audio levels. I am well aware that I too have a very loud voice, which I have found ways to control. Yet in my rambunctious youth I can only imagine how loud I was. Good gods how the hell did my parents not throw me out of a window????

Never having children….EVER!!!! Love kids, they rock and all that but ill be part of their learning experience or the godfather or goofy uncle who spoiles kids rotten….not a parent!

April 20, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I only teach one class today. Its my last week of teaching 4th grade and I decided to go out with a bang. I showed them a one of a kind movie! I had been saving this up for 9 months, waiting for it to be the last thing I ever get the pleasure of showing this class, and so…I showed them “Labyrinth.” Yes…Jim Henson and George Lucas on Acid. Where David Bowie takes a bunch of muppets as minions, puts on tights and signs along to “Dance Magic Dance…” …I promise I am not gay, I am just a wildly emotional and mildly flamboyant individual. It was a confusing and rousing success. I know for a fact they did not understand a word of what was said, but they loved every second of the film. Kick ass….

Alas, I had only one class to teach today, and as I am going to remain sober until I do my medical checkup next week I found myself without a whole heck of a lot to do…so I went running.

Hot damn I love running everyday. More then that I can run as long as I want as my digits aren’t freezing while I do so. Its strange how two months ago when I went running in three layers I had to run while clenching my crotch so that my most important digit would not freeze, and now I find myself in a Muay Thai wife beater and boxer shorts running on and on and on.

I should really start to run a little faster. I run almost 5 miles every single day and have been running between 3-6 miles at least three times a week for over six years now. I have become the master of the ten minute mile, which is a very respectable and brisk jog, so I guess aside from running more marathons the only thing to do is get myself to run faster instead of farther.

I have been resisting this for many reasons. To begin with, running for the longest while has sort of become my meditation. Something about the movement, the serenity, and the high level of activity really does something to me that helps bring all matters I consider to a much higher clarity. If I start to run faster then for the next month or so my body and mind will be too focused on my running to let myself concentrate like I can now as I adjust to a faster speed. I guess there is always a cost to whatever you do. I do know though id lose an arm before id lose a leg…Running is just too damn important to me.

The next time I join the Peace Corps maybe ill be in a more tropical location and can spend my time instead running longer year round…or an island where ill live near the beach and can take up running… Two months left of service…I see my mom in about a month too…that hasn’t sunk in yet. Its been far too long that I have been away from my American family that the concept of seeing them again doesn’t give me an immediate reaction….im sure it will kick in as May rolls around.

I love the month of May, all good and wonderful things happen during that month. Even in Mongolia…its when the beer tents outside the state department store open back up. Ive been sober for close to three weeks now… I love what its done to my body but boy howdy am I bored sometimes.

April 21, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

It’s a little known fact. Most people think that most movies that were based on either comic books or video games didn’t really kick off until the 21st century when X-Men really paved the way. Its sometimes hard for me to remember all of them, but some of the earliest live action movies of video games go back way further.

Back in the late 1980’s and early 1990’s a lot of action video games and comics were made into video games. They usually had the motto and themes of movies of that time. The innocence of youth, the unbendable will of the human spirit. The goodness of all of us to be hard working and industrious people who rely on ourselves above all else…basically your Regan propaganda stuff. Perhaps the greatest example I can think of… “Double Dragon” Released back in about 1991 or so the movie was and still holds a very dear place in my heart. When I was younger I didn’t really realize it but the two protagonists are in essence if Bill and Ted knew martial arts. I mean it, it’s the two of them running around fighting characters vaguely familiar to the video game and goofy gangs such as “The Clowns” and “The Mowhawks” is a great tribute to “The Warriors” or something like that.

Recently I dusted off my copy of the movie “Double Dragon” and I really gotta say, they don’t make movies like they used to. I am not old either, merely I mean that less than 20 years ago we used terminology that we don’t anymore… loved the movie.

April 22, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I do not like that man…I must get to know him more…” –Abraham Lincoln

So today something totally awesome happens. We as humans are very prone to the idea of symmetry. We like to see how things continue as they were before again and again and we strive for it in many ways. Perhaps the most enjoyable though is when it seems to happen by pure coincidence, and it is that that happens today.

It is my grandfathers birthday, bringing him to the ripe bold age of ninety years old! (may we all have such longevity!) Well now that in it of itself is pretty awesome, but better still is that this means the 30 year interval now has the perfect round number. I am 30 years old, my father is 60 years old, and my grandfather is now 90 years old. That ladies and gentlemen…is pretty badass. It also tragically means that barring Esther keeping a secret from me that I will not be bearing a child at the age of 30 and will not carry on the symmetry of this cycle. Still, such a cool event as a grandfathers birthday warranted a phone call home. I called at 9am their time as that’s 9pm my time and I sleep pretty early these days, and though my grandmother picked up the phone my grandfather was out at the farmers market in Greensboro, North Carolina. I gotta say for 90 years old my granddad is still pretty spry! Ah well, I got to catch up a little with my happy as always grandmother who was thrilled to hear that I would be back in America within a few months. Its funny, but I really sort of miss Greensboro myself of late. Maybe I just miss the idea that I used to consider Greensboro rural…now the town has a population that rivals all Mongolian cities but Ulaanbaatar! I miss salmon steaks and iced tea on my grandparents (now my dads) house and I miss that annoyingly muggy summer heat that for some reason seems so appealing now. I even miss the endless amount of lawns that need to be mowed because there are no animals to just graze the ground like we have here in Mongolia. Mongolia once again demonstrates the way in which relativity can make all the difference in all things…

… in other words it was great talking to my grandmother this morning, and I got to wish my granddad a happy birthday through her…

so what else happened today….

Okay, now odds are I will be teaching at random intervals throughout the month of May at my school as needed, but if May is anything like last year the kids who actually have tests that matter have already taken them and the concept of sitting quietly in a school loses to the prospect of going outside and running around like it is going out of business. Given how its not even May yet and its already 60 degrees outside I imagine school will be even more empty than it usually is. So, for the sake of argument I am going to say that today is my last day of class. I showed them the rest of Labryinth, and I helped them all in writing down and singing the David Bowie song “Dance Magic Dance” I love to teach…but I am looking forward to the summer as well. If they want to see another film during the month of May I think that I will show them the 1987 live action “He-Man and the Masters of the Universe” movie. Ah good times.

So, im a geek…obviously. Have been my whole life, and while I may mature the geekiness remains. One thing that qualifies my geek status is my daily checkup on a website called aintitcool.com. The title of this website was actually based on the John Travolta one liner from the John Woo 1997 movie entitled “Broken Arrow” in which Travolta goes one on one with that dude who played Will Scarlet in the Kevin Costner Robin Hood movie. Anyways, the site has been around since people started socially using the internet and it has always been my source of finding out about news on what new on tv.

This is a website run by a couple king geeks out of texas who have sources in film, tv and some video game material btw…

So anyway I had little going on being a Friday and when I scanned down the website I saw the following caption: “Capone says: The Paul Reiser show doesn’t suck that much!” I keep up on movie and tv news a lot so it takes a lot to bring me up short…but the name Paul Reiser. Now that’s a name I have not heard in over a decade. The man who was half of the great “Mad About You” duo. The tv show that made me fall in love with New York, the idea of marriage, and pretty happy blondes like Hellen Hunt. As per Paul Reiser…well he didn’t do anything bad to the show at least. The show of course completely fell to ruin the minute they started trying to, and then actually having kids. What the hell is that about?

-Mad About You

-L Word

-Angel

-Charmed

-House

-ER

-The Office

-Xena

-Even Community I fear will apart now that what’s her name is knocked up

-Spartacus: Lucy Lawless gets knocked up and the next episode shes dead!

All of them have lost their zeal the minute a kid shows up…but I digress.

So to hear he’s making a show…well a quick Hulu later and I watched an episode. My feelings…difficult to say. To see what Paul looks like ten years later is sorta what happens when you compare Ed O’Neil from his “Married With Children” days to his “Modern Family” times now. Not really all that different looking, just a little more filled out and with grey hairs. The show itself is of Paul Reiser as the family man in the suburbs. Hell the house even looks like one of the “Modern Family” houses!!! To me the show feels like it’s the continuation of Mad About You, except in the last ten years Paul dumped Jamie, married another woman, moved to the suburbs and started to have children. Not the worst show ive ever seen and I hope it gets to go on to another season, but you never know. The crowds are fickle….Greys Anatomy made it, Firefly got canceled…so being good seldom results in assured outcome.

But I recommend everyone who likes Modern Family to give the show a try…or Mad About You, but your either over 50 or were like me and watched this when you were a kid.

April 23, 2011. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

“When you decide to move on, there are only a few things to take with you. A few sets of sturdy clothing, the tools of your trade, and a memento of your past. After that, everything else…you just don’t need.” –Dexter Morgan

This morning I woke up rather early. A month sober has made me realize just how much alcohol was making me sleep more than I needed to over the winter. Then again, the 4pm sunsets were not helping either but still. Anyway while packing to get to UB with time to kill I started looking around at some of the things I posses and wondering what exactly will be returning to the states and what things will not. I am not a man of a great number of possessions. Buddha hit that on the head and Chuck Paulanuk brought it to my young adulthood attention ten years ago: “The things you own, end up owning you.” Yet today I looked around at all the things that are “mine” and realized that there is so very little I will be returning with.

My mother told me when I left that none of my clothing would be welcome back when I return. How wonderfully Freudian that at the age of thirty my mother still tells me what I can do and it actually gets enforced. Actually the reason her demands are still met are due to the fact that she never makes a demand I cant follow, and she is willing to bend her rules from time to time. So when looking at the duffel bag under my bed and in the back corner of my drawer I realized that a lot of the formal clothing I bought I never even wore. I only used my ancient khaki cargo pants and polo shirts for teaching, and the other formal gear was worn only once or twice. Meaning I have two dress shirts, a tie, black cargo pants and formal black pants that I never wore once…and should a job stateside that requires formal clothing come up that would be a handy thing to not have to purchase again. As per some of the other clothing I have…yes I imagine that even my hand washing has not given my casual shirts their last call.

I looked at some of the shirts I have here and saw that they are all around five years old. That was back in 2004, the time when I had lost all my weight and was finally in shape enough to wear the decent one shirt/pant combo I loved. My two pairs of jeans were also exactly as old. Size 30 by 34…hot damn its great to be thin! Alas, going beyond even smell the jeans I brought have reached their journeys end. Both are worn and shredded in various spots, and though I can still fit in them, it may be time for another set. So no jeans. The socks I own are finished. The wool ones were very nice but I don’t see myself living in -40 conditions with tents much in the future. Maybe for a keepsake ill take one pair home, but it may be nice to donate my remaining pairs of socks to the M22’s. Im sure someone could forgive the smell in exchange for the warmth.

My boxers…again five years old. They are worn and shredded, most of which were already falling apart when I first joined two years ago. Now they barely even have a partition for each leg anymore. Yet somehow they still have the red string on them. The string the Thai kickboxing camp tied to the cloth that signified they were one particular load. Ive always been amazed how in five years those tiny red threads somehow stuck around…

Like all things I own, it has a story behind it. It has traveled with me through good times and bad. Hard knocks and golden ages…and yet time little by little wears all things away….

Running shoes….winter coats…foxtails and solar showers….all dearly purchased…and all will likely be left behind. I just don’t need them, or like my running shoes will buy a new set when I get back. I pounded a lot of pavement with those running shoes, but two years is the life expectancy of those things when you run as much as I do…maybe even a little less. The winter coat was nice, but I miss my black trenchcoat… My Harry Dresden look will be taken back up when I return.

As per my book collection…I dunno… The books I have had sent to me over the last two years have been a saving grace, especially last year with the absence of the internet. Though I love every one of them the logistics of bringing them all back would nearly occupy a suitcase in it of itself! Perhaps I will donate the hardcovers I have to the Peace Corps library and hang onto a few key novels that have sentimental value to me. Ill have to decide on that when the time gets closer.

When flipping through my books and files collection I came across a notebook I hadn’t seen in a LONG time, and yet when I saw it my heart warmed. I had found my old Mongolian language notes. The ones I had taken notes on two years ago in Erdene. I flipped through the pages, looking at the things I had written down and didn’t know. Every time I turned a page I laughed and cried. I looked at all the words and things I didn’t know how to say. I still suck at speaking foreign languages, but every now and then you need to look back on what happened in the past to realize how different you are now. Ill hang on to those tiny notebooks. A good keepsake/souvenier of personal value.

After that I sort of looked over everything else in my ger. Kitchen supplies, water bins, decks of cards, jump ropes and a few toiletries I never used like sunblock… in essence, my ger is full of things that when I move on I am truly just leaving behind. Its important to have that ability I think. To let that which is no longer to do with you…just let it go. I should take that lesson and apply it psychologically too.

Well I guess the month of May and June can be used to clean ger and give away things as I will be splitting my May and June between UB and my town tying up odds and ends and just making sure theres nothing left undone.

My host father/family still owes me over 50,000 tugriks but seeing as I am not all that pressed for cash ive decided to leave the matter and consider it a gift of goodwill.

So when being driven into UB it turns out that my town has a brand new bus to use for carting people back and forth. Compared to the minivan that used to take us this thing is mammouth! Seriously its got seating for 25…which meant 50 people crammed in it but still it was nice to have it. Its very Korean of a bus too, the writing is even in Korean too. Nice to see my town getting nice, new things. Sure it may not survive a trip to Dadal but it certainly would do fine carting people back and forth between Bagakhangai and UB. Itll be nice for the next two PC volunteers in Bagakhangai to use!

Anyway, today I bought a bottle of duty free whiskey to compliment the bottle of Jagermeister I brought from Germany so that for the COS conference we will have something to party with… On Monday I will find myself in a dentists chair and I will see if my new habit of daily flossing will do anything to improve my time with these sadists, on Tuesday I run through medical to be sure that I am illness free and hopefully capable of another round of service at the conclusion of this one. Then on Wednesday…wow, its that old gang of mine. The M20 PCV’s, all together again…one …last …time. The Close of Service conference is about to begin…

Endgame, last call, twilight, the dark shadow cast by the final salute…Couldn’t tell if I want to laugh or cry at this moment believe me. I think that’s all for this months blog. Ill pick back up and fill you in on the conference in May… The month of May

…my favorite month of the year is almost upon us…

April 7, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Like…seriously.” –I swear to Sky Father the customs man truly said that to me after I told him my reason for travel was to come to Starkbierfest.

Guys…wow…. Yep…wow seems to say it best.

The trip to Bavaria was all I seemed to talk about for all of March, so when it finally came to happen I was sorta surprised that it was really happening. I had not stayed exclusively in a country for 2 years in nearly ten, so as my alarm awoke me at the UB guesthouse at the lovely hour at 4:30 in the fracking morning I took a quick cold shower and then stashed my computer away at the guesthouse. A friend of the owner seems to have quite the racket job of being on call to take gringos back and forth to the airport. Actually a bus goes there too, but no buses run at that hour and it just made sense. So 15000 tugriks later (still cheap as taking the NY subway to JFK…but dammit still!) I found myself at the ass crack of dawn looking at the Chinngis Khan airport.

I know Mongolia is a little out of the way, but this airport is still a tad dinky. Seriously airports in a city like say Greensboro, North Carolina are bigger than this place is. But, for me the process was pretty straightforward, no messy China or Russian visa requirements so it all just went along smoothly. They padded me down, asked where I was going, and before I knew it I was sitting next to a Fulbright scholar taking a trip to Russia. We PCV’s have a knack for bumping into Fulbright scholars, a sort of mobile Peace Corps volunteer if you ask me! Seriously I asked about all he did was talk about doing everything I already do, but he gets to do it traveling around. Not bad…too bad my grades and SAT’s weren’t nearly high enough to even consider such a thing.

A few hours later im on an airplane. Hadn’t done that in a while, and on the Russian Airline plane all the Stewardesses were Russian women. Not one of them spoke a word of Mongolian, and over half the plan is Mongolians! Well thought out! Luckily a good portion of the Mongolian passengers could speak Russian or English, but on this flight I was seated directly next to two VERY countryside Mongolians who did not have a word of any foreign tongue. Yea, good luck with that!

The plane was an international plane, but as I’ve usually traveled the America-Europe route I forgot some international planes still do not have TV’s even for coach loungers. Now granted, I had my own seat and was offered food and drinks during the flight I would say it trumped any trip I usually take in Mongolia, but yea, the next six hours to Moscow were pretty damn boring.

We were racing with the time zones so it meant that we took off at 8 and arrived in Moscow at about 10…pretty cool. During the meal portion of the flight when the Mongolian couple sitting next to me demonstrated that they couldn’t speak Russian or English…well lets say I found myself out of Mongolia and for probably the only applicable time in my life I was going to make use of my knowledge of Mongolian. And with complete formality I assisted them in picking beef over fish (naturally) and a cup of tea instead of coffee (again naturally) and the Russian stewardess woman who…she was the first natural blonde I had seen in years and it was not just blonde as in light but as in pitch dark cabin and I could find this woman who was also very nice on the eyes. She asks me afterwords in English “You speak Mongolian?!” very incredulously like, as in she had seen a blue moon. I was both flattered and nervous in front of a beautiful woman who I was impressing so quickly my brain stumbled through every affirmative I knew in giggle style before getting to one that works, really rapid fire too… “teem,si,oui,ja,da..da,YES!” The beautiful woman gave me a private happy grin smile and moved along. Why the hell did that moment make me so happy?

So the plane lands, and I have 40 minutes to beat through customs and to reach my next terminal. I did it but with only minutes to spare, lucky me. The size of Moscow's airport astounded me. Seriously its made of over 7 terminals, any one of which could swallow the entire Chinggis Khan airport with room for runways to spare! Even more astounding was how this was only one of three main airports Moscow has. It was bright and colorful and for the first time in forever Caucasians outnumbered Asians. People were taller than me, a customs woman official was taller than me!!! Its amazing what two years can do to someone.

The flight between Moscow and Munich was shorter, but sure felt longer. The view helped though. I watched between Moscow and Munich how the weather changed. Ground of white became ground of brown, slowly moving into yellow and then as we came in for a landing the rolling plains of Bavaria were in view. It had been over two years, but back I was in Munich Airport.

I know that Airport better than Dulles by now, and I just blasted right through. My first stop at an ATM and a deep breath later gratefully showed me that the card did not think it was stolen and out popped the Euro, one of my favorite currencies. It also meant that for the first time in two years I would be using coins once again too. That would take a little practice.

Its strange the things you remember and the things you forget. Here’s something I remember the moment the S-Bahn line pulled up to Munich Airport. I stepped on, sat down, and waited for the familiar sound “Nacht Halt: Stuberstausse” The woman’s voice telling me what the next stop is. That woman’s voice they use sounds shockingly like what the voice of a computer would be like if it were married to HAL from 2001. So yea, that for some reason is hardwired into my head. But things id known for a lifetime seemed to had slipped by. When walking between the main train station and the entrance to the old city called Karlzplatz I swear to Sky Father you pass all these things: A McDonalds, a Starbucks, a KFC, A Pizza Hut…and another McDonalds (they serve McBeer) McDonalds was somewhere vaguely memorable, but I seriously couldn’t remember any of these other franchises existed. I mean when I saw them the wave of old TV commercials came back into memory but seriously when I first just looked at them my mind was a complete and total blank. Spooky.

So….its 8 or so hours time zone difference between Mongolia and Germany, and I hadn’t slept once on the plane. Just cant do it…believe me i've tried. We had taken off from Mongolia at 8 in the morning…and reached Germany by 12pm. Ive had plenty of jet lag in my life, but this one took the cake. Seriously I couldn’t tell which way was up or down. Luckily as I have Munich hardwired and I was only there for a day before I left for Austria my day was just spent going to the Virtualmarkt in central Munich and having a beer. While walking through the market the first thing I realized was that I was smelling food. I hadn’t done that really in Mongolia. I don’t have a strong sense of smell and I never really noticed it before but on that day I could smell everything…and EVERYTHING smelled amazing. In the market fresh water fountains poured out drinkable water, something I was most unaccustomed to as well. I felt afraid to touch the stuff out of sheer uniqueness! The beer being sold this week was Hofbrau, not my favorite so I got a half liter. That and a quarter kilo of strawberries. Everyone in America thinks Germans eat nothing but sausage. Now trust me, Germans are indeed REALLY good at sausages and the like, but their best kept secret is their amazing produce as well. And strawberries…I mean common, what better fruit to get reacquainted with right?

So it was me, a beer, strawberries, a bunch of tall happy friendly people sitting under chestnut trees in the spring which had just begun to sprout their leaves for the upcoming summer. Sky father take me now!

…No wait, first let me go to Austria. That night I fell asleep at 7pm after forcing myself to stay awake, but this was not nearly late enough, and sure enough at 4 in the morning I awoke. Tired still but unable to sleep further. I gave myself a good hot water shower, bought the hostel breakfast, and realized that while I had 3 hours until my train left, I had little else to do so I just went to the station. The central train station of Munich is colossal. Seriously this thing is a titan among titans, as well it needs to be too, lot going on. All I can imagine is some octopus with a human brain pulling all the switches getting all the trains in and out of that place.

After some book reading, jet lag loathing and boring waiting the train arrived and we headed out to Vienna, Austria. In all my European travels I had never been to Vienna. Rather funny actually as I was raised in Vienna, Virginia. I had reservations about the price of the ticket, but my American mother had wisely advised “Oh shut up and fork out the dough you whiner” (im paraphrasing) The train went well, and when I arrived in Austria, well I had a different kind of culture shock. Now not only was it a new culture but one I hadn’t encountered before. Similar to something I know but at the same time somewhat different. It didn’t feel bad, just…weird is all.

I stayed at a hostel next to the Naschmarket, sort of southwest of the center of Vienna. The market itself rocks, its an endless number of cafes and vendors. Vienna is quite a bit more East than Munich, and the types of foods for sale differed. Instead of fruits and wursts and pickles the big seller was….olives. Oh….goood….GODS!!!! I LOVE OLIVES. I love all the kinds in the world and their wonderful saltiness within. Next to the olives sat pita breads and falafel bits for sale. (Heart beat……RISING) I mean what could you possibly do to top this. And then I thought how they sold the falafel individually and didn’t wrap it in the bread so why on earth do you sell pita?....no…. no don’t tease me… this is too much. And at the end of the display case, after years of either not having it or ready mix stuff that just doesn’t do the same thing to me…. As I looked at six bins of this creamy, greasy, wonderfully mashed up bean I realized that there truly must be a Sky Father and Earth Mother after all….HUMMUS!!!!!!!

...Okay Sky Father….NOW you can take me.

…No wait, let me get some wine too. Another good secret about Germany and Austria is the availability of wines they have. Really good, REALLY cheap wines. Especially the white wines which I secretly enjoy a little more than their red counterparts. At the cafes in the market your welcome to just buy from the vendors and park yourself down and eat as long as you buy their wine. (Oh dear right???) So there I sat eating hummus, olives, whole wheat pita, and drinking white wine in a market of busy vendors on a beautiful warm spring day. Sky father….

…no wait, lets see the rest of the city first. Vienna looks a little different than Munich. About 90% of Munich was razed to the ground during WWII. Vienna got bombed too, but some of the old stuffed survived. The subway stations of Vienna are not remakes of old stuff (ie: looks classical but actually brand new) no some of the old stuff in this city is actually the old stuff for real. It made the city seem a little more, unique. Like an antique of some kind. The architecture though is somewhat similar to the German comparisons. Nice churches, beautiful opera house, there's even a disgusting open park that all the 20 somethings go to in front of a church to drink their night away (I took a picture of the aftermath) The beer of Austria did not impress me all that much btw. Not bad, but i've definitely had better.

On my second day in Austria (tragically also my last) I was going to meet up at a couchsurfer meeting. The couchsurfers is something I only learned about about a month ago, but now that I have had the pleasure I cant believe I was not on this website 5 years ago. Its truly what it sounds like. People living in different parts of the world offering up a spare bed, couch or even a floor to anyone traveling through. You also use it to meet up with someone who knows about a city more than you do. For Vienna, there was going to be a couchsurfing party at some location and I was going to meet a fellow couchsurfer who lived in Vienna to walk around that evening and then make our way over to the party. Helpful, given that I didn’t know exactly where the party was. We met at the old church in the center of town. Much like at the church of our lady a model of the church was built next to it so the blind could know what the church looked like. I met Eli and off we went. She actually helped me find the café where Freud used to play chess! She rocked, seemed very nice and well mannered, and even made me eat my first ice cream in forever! We walked along the river edge, yammering about things like what we do and what life is like in Mongolia and Austria. Different people, different worlds, not all that different at all: It’s a theme I have been encountering a lot of late.

The party was in a military vehicle depot. Seriously, this was one of those depots built during the cold war to house jeeps and vans and such for World War III. 25 years ago it housed a van to transport artillery rounds, now it houses couchsurfer parties. That really makes me think about what the world will look like in another 25 years… The party was…AWESOME! It was like being at a disco but not being required to dance. I sat at a table, was surrounded by English speaking couchsurfers all with fascinating things to talk about. We did so, drank a lot, and all around had a good time.

I was still not over my jet lag at this point so by 1am I needed to get back to the hostel so I wouldn’t miss my train in the morning. It all went well luckily, and the next morning I got back on a train and was back in Munich….for a day, for the following day I was heading to Nuremberg. For that day in Munich, still exhausted from jet lag, drinking and the constant moving around I headed to the English garden and just literally collapsed onto the grass. Spending the whole day just looking up at the sun. It’s the first time that I realized that the clouds….were very far away. Seriously I had been in Mongolia so long that the proximity of the clouds to the ground compared to the rest of the world finally caught up to me and I realized that in Munich this was what I had seen for most of my life and that Mongolia had wormed its way into being normal for me in so many different ways. The English Garden has a beer garden that serves beer and I had brought some strawberries and apples with me and saw that the Hofbrau Starkbier was for sale. I gave it a taste. Different from its Paulaner counterpart the Salvator. One of the reasons I had come to Germany was for the Starkbierfest that takes place during this time of year in Bavaria.

On to Nuremberg, where I spent the next two days running. The city of Nurembergs walls still stand, and the circumference between the wall and moat makes for an outstanding jogging track. Both days I got up and got out my running shoes and did some pavement pounding. I had always wanted to take up running in Germany, its seemed such a serene place to jog, and it sure did not disappoint. I even brought my camera and snapped the odd shot here or there. Passing under tunnels, running over one man bridges, it all looked so amazing that 45 minutes later I was all the way around. I could have done another, but given the whole plane ride and the fact I already felt good I decided not to push it. I had been to Nuremberg before and seen it all and done it all, so I spent the daytimes drinking wine along the river edge, eating falafel at the greatest falafel stand in all of Europe, watching the array of different people walk by me, and all around just soak in more and more of the warm weather and the sun.

The evening of the second day was another couch surfing meeting thing. This was at a really cool bar sort of between Nuremberg and Furfth. I was the only foreigner coming to the thing but once again I just got invited right in. Good beer and good currywurst, the most unauthentic and yet the most popular wurst in all of Germany. (really it is) There are some really amazing people to meet in this world. One day I hope to be living in a location where I can host couchsurfers too. (there welcome to stay in my ger….but I sorta live in a middle of nowhere town right?)

The next day I went back to Munich where that evening I went to a final couchsurfing event. I met this really cool American woman there too. Nothing like that, just a woman that all around rocked. I didn’t even really notice if she was pretty or not (I think she was) it was just so amazing to speak to an American in their 20’s who actually went and did what I never got around to doing: Living and working in Germany. Now then again, she seemed also amazed that I was doing the whole Peace Corps thing so I guess we all do awesome in our own way right?

We also talked about our Ex’s. We both had the great deep scar. That woman/man who absolutely destroyed us. Luckily we were also both at a point past our loss that we don’t jump each other as an excuse to feel and we actually smile when we talk about them now. Collective healing instead of collective destruction, I like the feel of that.

I did sort of decide during this point of 3 days of amazing couchsurfers that barring a new dream job I am going to make this Germany thing eventually happen. I just love this country a little too much not to. Before 35, married to a German girl by 40, and live the middle age in a country where a beer at 2 in the afternoon is the staple, the four seasons are beautiful, the people are friendly and happy and somehow despite generations of living in America I can still feel the pull of my ancestral roots (technically they were Frankish more than Bavarian, but lets keep that to ourselves)

As a working woman she tragically had no time to bump into me later that week as the rest of my time was in Munich. So I woke up the next morning, realized a had a good four full days in Munich, and my jet lag was finally behind me. Well, I knew what to do next! Actually, despite having seen and done it all in Munich a thousand times over there was one final place left to inspect. I headed over to the Hirschgarden. This was where the royals kept their beergarden and it’s the largest in the world. It seats 8000 people and on a warm spring afternoon we actually come pretty close to filling it too.

But…there was one final treat in store for me. You see, I had never actually been to this garden before, but as the royal garden I imagined it was the beer of the royals, Hofbrau. A totally drinkable beer, but of the Munich bunch its near the bottom of my list. It goes Spaten, Hofbrau, Paulaner, Lowenbrau, HackerPshoor, and then Augustiner. As I approached the garden from the distance and walked my way to where they doll out the beer I saw…irregularities to my presumption. First the chairs had an inscription that while I couldn’t read didn’t look like the one at the English Beer Garden that also serves Hofbrau, the colors of things didn’t match it, in fact they looked….see I was getting closer and closer and as I began to allow myself to believe something I thought to be impossible I finally got close enough to see the guy who was pouring the beer…… and it was coming right out of the wooden barrel. There is only one of the Munich brand that still requires that when they serve their beer it comes straight from the wooden keg. The greatest beer that has ever existed…. The beer that could singlehandledly make me want to live in this city. The beer….. of Augustiner. And it was being sold in the largest beer garden in the world. I knelt from my walk-to-sprint advance in the middle of the beer garden and as a single tear passed my eye and rolled down as I stared up at the sun and the timeless Sky Father above me with a whispered voice I spoke only these words. “Thank You” The sun ducked behind a cloud as I did so and made a little bit of a twinkle, ill take that as Sky Father giving me a wink. I gave the ground which housed the beer in caves to keep it cool a gentle pat to also give the Earth Mother her due as well.

Now for beer. Amazingly, the starkbier was for sale in the beer gardens as well, I was not at all aware of this despite having been to three previous starkbier celebrations. This was my first starkbier ever from Augustiner which they called it “Maximator” Its fitting, the best lager is also the best starkbier. I don’t know how to describe it, it had the fullness of a guiness but the all around comfort of a light ale. It was….bliss. I traded between lagers, radlers and starkbier to keep myself upright.

I would have spent every day there, I really would. Yet the next day was a tad rainy, and instead I went to Paulaners beer hall for the band music of Starkbier. I did the dance of “Cowboy und Indianier” and all that good stuff and got to talk to some very nice Austrian girls who thought Peace Corps sounded like the coolest thing on the planet. I told them that the VAC organization is pretty much the same thing and they said they would look into it. I showed them a picture of me in my dell on my IPod and they laughed so hard that tables in three different directions stared at us…tall order given the commotion of that beer hall.

By the way: Ill just comment that that picture is hanging from one of Paulaners walls and is by far the funniest thing to me. I love how the smallest girl has her feet tucked in as she chugs. I so need to get my American family to come with me, they don’t even need to go to a festival, they just got to see this place!

The final two days of Friday and Saturday… well I wouldn’t call it a bender because I was never drunk. Really I swear I was not. Sure I wouldn’t want to have driven a car but at no point did I do anything stupid, or act in a way unbecoming to myself, and from about 11am to 11pm each day (maybe 1am Saturday) I kept a continuous and ongoing degree of buzz inside me. That is not an easy feat btw. Anyone with a full wallet and a beer garden can get drunk, but to drink yourself to enjoyment for hours and hours on end without overdoing it….well that takes practice! Actually it was so bright and warm on Saturday that I gave myself a very light suntan on my face and arms! Mongolia, all the sun in the world and I have never once gotten burnt, one day in a Bavarian garden in spring and I roast alive…figure.

Greatest thing? No hangover…..the entire trip, never felt crummy at all. I awoke after six hours of sleep on Sunday ready to fly out to UB as though I had spent the evening before in bed with a cup of tea. Good gods I love Germany. So how did I feel on Sunday getting onto a train to take me to the airport? I tried to assess myself and found myself realizing that Germany and I have some sort of eternal connection. It happens every single time I am here and is showing little sign of giving up. I lived in the opposite direction of Germany of the other side of the world for nearly two years and I still found an excuse to come here. Will I miss Mongolia? Yup, but I know…I bedrock know…. That this is not the last Germany will see of me. So no, nothing bittersweet… My parting gift from Starkbierfest was at the Munich Airport. This country loves beer so much and is so good at it that the airport makes its own beer called Airbrau. Though small and unremarkable they too, for the 5th season create a starkbier. Each company has their own Starkbier and each name ends with “ator.” You know, Paulaner beer calls theres Salvator, Augustiner has the Maximator, Lowenbrau has the Triumphator. So…what is an Airbrau starkbier called….

…

…

Aviator….

…

…

Germany I love you…

…ill be back…

…you know I will…

So the plane right back was less enjoyable. Again no tiny tv’s to watch, and my company was a little more rounded than had been on the way here. And going away from something fun and I love. Not unhappy, just all around uncomfortable. I also had been wearing the same (im sure) beer smelly clothes for the last ten days with only a sink bath so yea it felt all around awkward.

Still, at 6am the next morning after a connection once again at Moscows wonderful airport I reached the Chinngis Khan Airport in Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia. Welcome back! Customs took forever, mostly because people up front couldn’t spell in Cyrillic. I on the other had got a 5 second look then pass….i must have an honest looking face. Outside I got my first whiff of a reminder of Mongolia as a thousand taxi drivers all ran up to me screaming to take their ride. Though irritated and uncomfortable from the plane ride I still REALLY didn’t want my first experience back in UB to be being ripped off by an ass of a taxi driver so I did what no gringos do in Mongolia. I took the bus back to the center of town. The reason this is so unique for foreigners is that the buses do not come to the airport. The airport demands a 500 tugriks (50 cent) tax to enter into the airport area and rather than pay that atrocious amount they simply make their airport stop 2km away down the dirt clearing to the east of the airport. So there I am at 7 in the morning strolling along in the dirt in the direction of a bus that will take a half hour to reach the center of town. I did it with such a smile on my face as I realized that I don’t even know what bus to take when leaving Dulles International Airport in Washington D.C., but I know exactly how to do so in Germany and in Mongolia. I guess its funny what qualifies someone knowing how to live somewhere right?

The next two days I spent in UB, and they were NOT fun! Jet lag….really…really bad jet lag. I also think something about the flight did not agree with me as I felt hot in the guesthouse. Granted it’s a lot warmer in Mongolia since I left but you don’t sweat in Mongolia in April….you just don’t. The jet lag gave me impossible sleeping hours. Exhausted as all hell but at 3 in the morning it felt something like 12 noon or something. So for two night I basically sat in my bed, catching sleep when it would come to me.

On Wednesday I knew school was back up and running so I meekered back to my town and came across my ger sweet ger…I missed my ger. I missed its smelly outhouse, its broken down cars and car parts, its homicidal dog, its broken water bin, its lack of cheese and foods of flavour, its less than 2 meter long bed and most of all its lack of tv, internet, bars, and abundence of droppings of every known animal….

….home…

Today I looked at my email and Peace Corps had sent me the end of service paperwork to get working on. They give this to us now because it really is a mountain of paperwork too. Yet it did remind me that in less than two months my mother arrives at Mongolia, and then less than a month then that I am stateside, or tearing it through Russia or China with my Stepfather and then stateside. Though America differs greatly from Germany I am aware that the degree of culture shock headed stateside may not be as grandiose as my European culture shock. Then again, most of my American family lives in America, so I imagine ill be telling my Peace Corps stories a lot more in Mongolia next time out of country.

So…that was Germany…

February 28, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

“The most dangerous assumption people make when they drop a stone is that it will fall down rather than up solely because that is what it has done every single time before.”

It’s directions week! Its that fun week of kinetic learning with my students as we go through forward, back, left, right and north south east west along with turning and when each of them applies. Last year this lesson week was the bane of my existence as I could never get my counterparts to coordinate correctly with me. No such problem this year at all, and the lessons at least for their first day went really well. Next lesson on Thursday we do the maze exercises I developed last year. (give them a maze, tell them they must give you directions to get out. Wild fun)

So plans are little by little materializing about my need for a profession upon my completion of first Peace Corps wraps. The plan tweeks little by little but remains the same in principle: Apply to dream jobs and at the same time have my next Peace Corps volunteering tour roaring to go at the start of 2012. So the dream jobs I am qualified for are at Universities pretty much doing what I did before I got here. Lets me work towards a doctorate, a place to stay, health insurance and since they are dream jobs I would work in either a really kick ass city or near a beach I can surf at. Oh…and an Ivy league school too.

That means the only places ive applied to are Cornell, NYU, University of Hawaii, Georgetown, CalPoly, and Miami, oh and my Alma Mater Fordham University. The other reason these are dream jobs because I physically am not in America until July, and most Universities hire at the end of March and April. I may be qualified to all hell but even sports cars get test driven before being bought right? Still, got an email from Georgetown which I had interviewed at and they want to talk to me again, this time for an hour. Even if I don’t get the job a second, longer interview is rather flattering right?

End of February…about 6 months ago my mom sent me 3 of those insanely long pixy stix tubes. I love pixy stix. They hang just above my bed and I swore I would eat one every three months. I consider it a self imposed test of my willpower to constantly stare at the candy and not eat it. I get to have one tonight as I last had one at the end of November. Go me go!

March 1, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PEACE CORPS!!!!!

The merry merry month of March…meaning of course that we are allegedly at the end of the winter months. Amusingly we are also in the 9th of the nines, which means that the “warm weather has returned.” According to the Mongolian calandar at least. I guess for people who spent millennia wearing clothing made of thick sheep wool yes this weather might finally start to feel warm. For me, it means putting away my sweatpants and instead putting back on my pajama pants of Nintendo characters. It means that (once the most recent snowing on the roads) has melted I can run with even a greater sense of purpose. It also means that little by little I find the need of the fire in my ger less and less. Is it still cold? Yes, but compared to last month, and by a greater extent compared to last winter….the only thing keeping me from going outside is snow from a most recent fall. Some people continue to cook their ger’s with roaring hot fires, turning them into literal saunas. Ill take my sweating running thank you.

It also means thanks to my newfound running that I will be needing more water so as to wash both myself and my clothing. I shall not be returning to UB for the next three weeks and my clothes will require some hand washing. Most Mongolians hate the Spring. The weather is not yet ideal enough to feed their animals and the wind still bites the skin… I did not enjoy the spring last winter but considering we had snow on the ground until the last week of May I don’t even know if we had one. No I have high ambitions for March and April. These next 50 or so days (we have 2 weeks off at the end of March) will be my last as a teacher in Mongolia. Graduation takes place on May 1st (or maybe May 2nd as that is a Monday) and while the school casually remains open class sorta falls by the wayside.

I wonder what I should teach in my final two months of Peace Corps teaching in Mongolia. Any suggestions? I am thinking “Lucky” by Britney Spears. I have already taught Cotton Eye Joe and Country Roads….Lucky is slow lyrics and a popular star. Maybe I should make pizza with my students one day. Make it into a cooking instruction. Wow…that….sounds….AWESOME!!!

Honestly though, its hard to teach to a point in Mongolia. Learning not towards a dissertation has no end. The overwhelming majority of the students at my school do not go on to college or any other higher learning institute. Their state sponsored education ensures that all Mongolians have a most basic and usable set of skills and content knowledge, and their interaction in the school system teaches them the behavioral skills needed to ensure that they can be functional members of society as well. The “talented tenth” as W.E.B. DuBois was known to say go on to advance their education and later become entrepreneurs or leaders of their respectable communities as upbringing does not guarantee placement in Mongolian society. As I write this all out, taking no real stance on the issue, I see how even in this the Mongolian educational system is just so very….very….pragmatic/practical in nature. It’s strange to see this in things that I myself have been a part of now for so long too.

Do you know why most professors of insanely difficult subjects of history end up teaching at least onesurvey level courses? Yes some are forced to but there is another reason as well. After studying for so long on your own you find yourself in a position of hitting a wall of progression so to speak. Simply put you cannot learn more yourself without studying and teaching among others in a similar field. The great thing about learning is that it is not a zero-sum game. Me helping others to learn more does not drain from me, only enhances.

It was definitely a wise move to be placed teaching much younger children this year. Maybe it’s a circumstance directly related to Mongolian youth but the playfulness they posess is so much easier to work with than the chiseled stoicism and machoism which is the Mongolian teenager.

March 3, 2011. The bus on the road back to Bagakhangai, Mongolia

I tell you. It is a good thing that I have made my peace with the city of Ulaanbaatar because I keep having to show up to it. Two days ago my computer died on me again. Same problem. As the repair guys do not work on the weekend I needed to handle this now. So I got permission and headed to UB yesterday. Same building as last time, same dungeon of computer repair guys. Same steps too….take apart the computer, pull the video card, reinsert, start up. It took them six hours. I think they fixed it in an hour and just did not bother to tell me until the building itself was closing but I was too happy to have my computer fixed to care.

This computer is at its endgame though. I wont be doing any more video projects on it. A damn shame as my “Peace Corps 50th/We Didn’t start the fire” had some great lyrics to it. Internet and book writing and the occasional episode of Fringe is all I can stress this machine with doing or I risk killing my computer again. Don’t want that.

So I missed a couple of days of school, but as I have never called in sick this year or missed a day of work I wont beat myself up that badly. I feel like my computer is like my own Millennium Falcon. I type this in while the fan run hard and I just go “hear me baby hold together…”

March 4, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Arrogance, manipulation, gaul, sociopathic, asshole. Ask me today what a 9th grade student is like and I would use those adjectives. This was an isolated incident. It has not happened before to this degree of arrogance and the overwhelming majority (ie: Every other student in all my classes) are courteous and respectful students. I am sure I would feel better tomorrow and whatnot but I haven’t let myself get angry about something for a long long time. Not like this…not like this.

So when a student decided to intentionally fly in the face of my authority I was just not able to calm my center enough not to act. The little shit wouldn’t stop playing with his phone. I had an active lesson and everything. He didn’t have to even write anything he just needed to stop using his phone. He wouldn’t, and when he started using it the fourth time I had a bad flashback to exactly last year, when a 7th grader thought making goose honks in front of me would be the hottest thing. Trouble is now I was dealing with a hardened 9th grade student who knew I wouldn’t hit him. Plot thickens.

I walked up the aisle to get the phone and he runs to the window and leans half his body out. I could physically overpower him and drag his body back inside but I didn’t want it to come to that. These are not my usual students and I am filling in for Sarangoo who not only decided to give the class a miss but also decided to leave the school with all the other non-working teachers. Ten minutes, I don’t move, he doesn’t move. Finally they outflank me by sending students outside to get the phone dropped to them. He pulls himself back inside with the whole class cheering him and his defiance of the pacifist teacher and a shit for grin smile on his face on his ability to once again outflank a teacher who wouldn’t touch him….

I am 30 years old. I am twice this little brats size and stature. I have travelled the world, I have taught in schools that would put this little Podunk that odds are he will live out his life in to shame, I have two masters degrees, I turned down the most enjoyable job on the planet to move over to Mongolia so I could actually try to help and teach to those I would never get to meet otherwise and make four dollars a day for the privilege….and while on any other day I get the reward of smiling happy students grateful that I get to learn with them it was on a day like today all I had to show for it was this little brat thinking he was such a big shot because he thought he got away from my authority and that I wouldn’t hit him…. It’s at moments like this that while I don’t excuse crimes of passion I understand how those who would never harm a fly end up doing things they never thought themselves capable of.

My next movements caught both him and the class off guard. I had never laid a hand on any student before so they didn’t expect this of me but I grabbed him by the upper arm/armpit and started walking out of my class. When he started resisting I went cold and dark fast. I kind of frightened even myself with how quickly I reacted. I reached under his arm and put him into a half nelson and started walking him with me like that. The kids laughter died off at this point.

Even then he was trying to wiggle out of it but by then my figurative gloves were off. I was actually using some of my considerable strength to hold him in place. I scared him I think, which I don’t enjoy the thought of. I didn’t want to think I would ever bring myself to this but much like last year this was one of those moments where the early seed of a sociopath was forming, and a young student was finding the advantage of interacting and manipulating those who for some reason would not mean him harm.

With him pinned in a nelson I walked him to the entrance of the school, where the teachers finally saw what I was doing and they did the thing that even in that condition I didn’t do. I was too angry to mind that they did that either. Then I enacted my own form of discipline, I took his ass out of the school. If I could have grabbed him by his breeches I would have literally thrown him.

If it had been up to me he would not be allowed in again for weeks, but most likely he climbed through a window and was back by next class. I also would have broken his phone in front of him too. More than anything though I did demonstrate to him that his manipulation and exploitation of those unwilling to harm him will come to its own consequence. Oh, and I am never teaching that class ever again.

I am going to go run ten miles…

Postscript: Back from running five. Ill run the ten over the weekend. As usual I needed that. Really the whole running thing solves pretty much every problem I have for me. I am still angry as all hell about that kid, but my teaching of 9th grade is over, and I have a skype interview with Georgetown University that I do not want to miss tonight. So atm I am downing a lot of water (another thing I haven’t been having enough of over the past few months) and really all around feeling better. Wish me luck on the interview.

Postpostscript: While waiting alone at the school to do an interview, a drunk man came to the school. A drunk man I recognized but could not put a name to. He had a proposition for me. A very drunken, VERY indecent proposition. Not disgusted or anything, just a little curious where the hell that came from aside from excessive alcohol intake. I politely refused and resolved that matter. I tell you, in Peace Corps you never have a clue what is coming next. Every single step an adventure.

March 5, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Without wireless access this means that weekends in which I do not go to UB I am back to no internet. While very similar to the circumstances I was in last year the additional handicap is that I can no longer play video games on my computer either, or make ridiculous montage music videos and movies that I used to make. Meaning that my computer has little use without internet other that word documents. Actually though considering the number of times ive recently been in UB I could use a little relax time just in my ger.

So…I guess ill write my book, and use my time to also run longer on the weekends. Its been a LONG time (since September) that I ran more than 10 miles in a day, so instead I find myself jogging out 5 and walking the remained back. As the weeks progress ill take away the walking part and then add more on. I am in no dire training rush. Even if UB has a marathon again this year I do not think I will run it. Last year it cost me 80,000 tugriks to run the thing. No medal was given last year and the race course was literally out of town and back. Additionally, I became the hatred of every Eastern bound driver in all of Mongolia. Nothing nice to see at all. Still, I yearn to temper my body back into running condition again, and it gives me an excuse to sober up and shape up too. I like that.

Weekends without internet also mean creative cooking classes. Bruschetta remains one of my favorite things to cook. Easy to do, covers a lot of flavor sensations and pretty damn cheap too. We also got a new shipment of peppers and cherry tomatoes so a rudimentary salad is possible again. I have rationed my Peanut Butter too well as I have over 6 jars of the stuff. Now on my own yes I can eat through peanut butter at record speed, but it means that very often (5 days a week) I spend less than 1000 tugriks (less than a dollar) buying food anymore. Once again, I am for this… come to think of it I have no idea how much money is left in my Mongolian bank account anyway.

I figure one month from now it will be finally above the 40 degree Fahrenheit mark during the day. Its already pretty easy to go outside but to comfortably go hiking I need the temperature at that temp or above. We didn’t get to that until May last year, I am all for an earlier start to warmth this year. Days roll by…one by one by one…. In two weeks I gear up to get on a plane to Germany for beer and morning runs in the English garden. I get back from that and three weeks later we have our End Of Service conference….the following weekday school ends… then its beer tents and playing Frisbee with kids until my mom shows up, then after a week of that it will be time for me to pack my bags (probably a little lighter than when they came) and bring this wild 50th portion of my life to an end. (I am being optimistic and planning on living to be 100 despite heavy amounts of drinking and I lifestyle of higher risk traveling)

…. Wherever is my second year going so quickly?

March 6, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

When you don’t run more than five miles a day you forget two things. Just how absolutely amazing it feels to have that sensation of all around light burn in your legs the following morning, the other being that you get so tired so easily. I did another five mile run this morning and after a peanut butter sandwich I promptly fell asleep at 1pm and snoozed away the afternoon. I can remember since before the summer when I took a nap. Something about the cold and internet use.

From the age of 25 onwards I never had a problem ever getting to sleep. The only problems I have ever had dealing with stress relate to how invigorating it is to me. My body is really good at taking emotional stress and manifesting it as some kind of physical problem, and while meditation has lost its effect on me the way it used to I use running to help clear my mind of distractions for at least a period of time.

This weekend has been eerily without any wind. This is a weird sensation for two reasons. The first being that it is now the month of March means that it is officially Spring, the time where during the day the temperature MIGHT creep above freezing but what picks up even more than it had been over the winter was the howling wind. Last year there were days where I literally crawled my way to the stores or the schools. You might imagine that I prefer the current setup instead. Actually on a day like today without any wind whatsoever and the bright sun shining down you could even feel like you don’t need a coat on to just stand outside and bask in the bright beautiful sun. I love this country.

Salad, Peanut Butter Sandwiches, no alcohol, lots of running, no distracting internet. It’s a comforting feeling this weekend, like I am taking back up a lot of good habits that cold and discomfort had prohibited for so long. School this week I intend to not spend every waking hour at this week. Come back by 2pm when classes for me are done and to run and write more. I like the serenity I am feeling over the last two days, lets keep doing it. I figure a clean bill of health would be nice before I head to Germany and drink strong beer for over a week.

On that note, it looks like my side trip to Vienna will be canceled again. On Friday I went to buy the train ticket from Munich to Vienna and then back again and instead the price had tripled. Damn shame, I was hoping for a “Before Sunrise” type setup.

March 7, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I wish I was a lesbian…and you were a man!” –Coupling.

Concert taking place tonight. I remember this concert from last year in Ondortolge. I haven’t been to one of these in months so I am actually looking a little forward to it. I was just informed that because my school is all women (except me) we will be celebrating tomorrows “Womens Day” with a day off of school. Works for me, though I actually don’t teach all that much on Tuesdays anyway. Just another day of exercise and relaxation in my ger. With the wind out its still a hair too cold to be outside recreationally, but it sure is beautiful outside.

Postscript: Didn’t bring my camera, but the concert was not all that epic anyways. Not as bad as the earlier ones, just Ondortolge had a few more dances and a lot fewer songs. Additionally, why on Earth does a country that hates how loud Americans speak (we do) play their concert music to ear bleeding decibles. What the hell man?

March 8, 2011. Bagkahangai, Mongolia.

Day off school, not that it matters as I don’t really teach on a Tuesday anyways. It does mean no internet so instead I strapped back on my shoes and went out running again. Ohf, to run five times a day once again is just so good feeling. Really it does. You know something, while the actual gentle pain sensation in my legs is very good I think I have grown to love a certain element of the post-run here in Mongolia especially. Though in the winter it gets plenty hot this is a country so bloody dry that it can make pretty much anyone not sweat. Luckily if you induce sweating by say running 3-5 miles you then come back and with two ladels of water (I still gotta conserve the stuff!) I rinse up my hair and wash my face with a handful of water. When you splash the water on your face and feel the liquid roll off your face it passes your lips and you can literally taste all the salt in your body that it is finally getting to release. I know in a certain manner the ability I have to actually taste what is coming out of me might be a little disgusting but more still its an awesome thing to actually feel.

So much less stress, feel so much happier, and if I keep this up ill look good for all the German girls when I go sunbathing at the English Gardens. I know that the end of March is not exactly 30 degrees celcius in Munich but I am really just hoping for one or two really sunny, nice days.

I figure for my trip to Munich I will go to the only thing left in the city I have not yet been to, the big imperial palace. I hear it has a decent beer garden with deer in it as well…Germany in two weeks!

March 9, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

The wireless internet is back up and running at the school. Definitely nothing that happened on this end, so I am chalking it up to whoever in UB runs this for the school actually bothering to look into it. While helpful for me on weekends as I can check my email with that again it also means that my students can also use their computers with internet access once again and access: www.bolortoli.com What would that be you ask? Well I am so glad you asked. Someone (I imagine in UB) has actually begun to set up an online Mongolian-German-English dictionary. HOW COOL IS THAT!!!! I was hoping one day Rosetta Stone would get on board or something but to get an online dictionary means I suddenly can do so many more activities with my students as well!

Wednesday is a rather quiet day as well. The wind which earlier in the week had blissfully been absent has returned with a passion. Not at all painful just deeply noticeable when you walk to school.

Oh, but on the subject of world news. I saw that because of the turmoil in the Middle East that gas prices are going up even higher of late. I am so glad that that no longer concerns me. Not that it was ever that big of a matter to me. I used to own a 1993 Geo Prizm that got gas mileage so amazing for its time that even when I sold it for 400 dollars in 2009 it was still doing better than 90% of the cars on the road. But really, I am so glad I don’t worry about a car while out here…

March 10, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

With the temperature at the exact freezing mark, the sun bright and shining until 7pm and the wind surprisingly light this spring theres only one thing to say. Hot Damn second years of Peace Corps service. I no longer even make a fire at night (cold but with a blanket for me manageable) I think I might even be able to put away the winter coat and take back up my blue jacket I use to run in. Mongolia is so damn beautiful. It really is. Its one of those countries that can take over half a century of crappy Soviet building designs and still turn rusting piles of derelict building into something amazing to look at time and time again.

My running game has really picked up this week. Glad to know that even at 30 nothing specific hurts and everything crackles with a light burn at the end of a great sweat inducing calorie/stress burning run. Weekend is tomorrow, ill stick around this weekend in town as well. I have enough provisions and immediately following the next weekend I leave for Germany, might as well get some face time in my town.

Funny thing. Today it was so nice out that on the way back from buying some Orange Juice at the delguur (I wont be buying alcohol tonight obviously) I walked by the area where my town has a sort of tiny playground set up. Korean missionaries like to drop in over the summers to small towns like ours and give the gift of the word of God….and playgrounds. Actually they are all around great guys and girls, and the playground works. They even set up a swing set. Today when walking back, it was so nice out that I was compelled to walk over to it. Its small, designed for just after toddlers, but the great thing was that when I sat down on the swing I got a REALLY surreal flashback. All the way to Wolftrap elementary school. Which had, bar none the most kick ass swing set on the planet. I hadn’t sat on a swing in decades, and as I rocked back and forth all these old memories I hadn’t thought of in forever just suddenly shook loose and I burst out laughing. I wish I could say Mongolia is famous for getting me to burst out laughing, but I do that in America already as well…Mongolia just brings up a lot of unique instances.

Once again Mongolia gave me another reason to love it when a little kid came by and sat on the swing next to me and started to talk to me. A small whiff of my American sentiments kicked back in when I realized that I was a full grown man talking to a little boy who was not related to me on a playground. You see, that just doesn’t even register in Mongolians as a problem or something to keep an eye on or anything. I don’t know the magic formula but the problem that this would be in America (with good reason) is just not what happens here. So yea, I can sit next to a little kid on a swing at a playground and the only reason Mongolians think that I am weird is that I was making a lot more money before I came to this country.

Hehehe…. Its been another funny month. It only gets brighter and warmer from here as well…It’s a happy twilight, the realization of the end approaching with still so much time to savor. I am really doing this right.

March 11, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Month 21 of my time in Peace Corps is getting started on a Friday. How considerate of it! My haasha family (actually sorta only my dad as he is the only one actually living here these days) has begun this interesting habit of continuously using my water. In three days he has taken over 30 liters of my 70 liter drum. I get the strange feeling he just does not want to go on a water run …Its…surprising would be the word I would use. Just of all the places to be lazy in a Mongolian lifestyle leeching water seems a little strange to me. Not important enough for me to care, and I actually like to get water now that its warm out.

I have been keeping tabs on what happened in Wisconsin. Its just a magnet for an all around argument taking place in America these days. Rational voices are getting quieter and quieter and people with a single radical objective on one end of the political spectrum or another are getting more and more people to their cause. I don’t like the sound of it.

Last year…granted I only got world news once a month but last year things seemed to be going a lot better in politics than they are now. What the hell happened? A year ago as the vote for health care reforms rolled through chants of “Yes We Can” took place in Congress and it seemed to me like aside from the ultra right getting angry we actually had a real sense of change and progression in America. All I see in the news now is everyone arguing. Left is not happy that Obama works with moderates, the right is not happy because they are not in power, the ultra right is angry because they don’t have more influence with the moderate right, “what the hell” sounds appropriate doesn’t it?

The only thing I know for sure is that Wisconsin, Idaho and a lot of other states are for some reason turning to public schools and teachers in looking for places to save money. I wont get myself started on where money actually needs to be saved (we have spent less money on Peace Corps in 50 years than the US military spent on its occupation in Iraq alone for one day!!!!! ….okay so I got started) but instead ill simply put don’t fuck with us teachers. Were already not treated well and we have a LOT of influence on the youth of America. And yes, in the capacity of being a teacher that is a threat!

Many liberals may fear 2012, but if you ask my opinion it’s a good place for the left to get their house back in order. To bury whatever conservative the Republicans agree upon and demonstrate that while we don’t always agree with one another we all REALLY don’t want Gingrich/Romney/Huckabee/…Palin…or anything else the Right has to offer. Romney is the conservatives best chance (with a most likely ultra conservative vice president candidate), and when the left realizes in 2012 whats on the line I expect perhaps not a blowout against the conservatives but the all important executive branch will remain in control of the left. Common America, get it together out there! I REALLY don’t want to return to America and have to think that I missed a small golden age of political prosperity while in Peace Corps service!

As per the gas price spike….not suggesting im telling: everyone in America stop driving cars. Like, right now too! I mean it. Take up biking, get better public transportation going, get the damn fuel cell cars out and running or just walk dammit, youll lose weight and cut back on health care costs in America too! Frankly I don’t care what way we go about getting cars off the road, but stop trying to shape politics to get gas prices cheaper!!!!!

Too much politics for me, im getting a beer.

March 12, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Let me tell you. When you reach 30 years of age…when you have lived in a country that makes outdoor activities impossible for nearly half of the year….when you drink VERY excessively alcoholic liquors you don’t even like the night before…and you still somehow run over 20 kilometers or half of a marathon in the midst of March and the only thing you wish for is water and a good classic episode of Star Trek: The Next Generation…well let me just say that in terms of health I have made more than enough bad calls but I must be doing something right!

I can get old without an ounce of complaint so long as I can keep running the way that I did today.

It was a glorious run! I also had a great Peace Corps moment. I helped an old lady carry coal across town. This needs some in depth explaination. I had just hit two hours and ten minutes. Knowing my pace that meant I had hit 13 miles. My running was over. I was less than a kilometer from the town but as I ran back towards town on the road was the woman, she was lugging two bags of coal. She was tiny, as many old Mongolian women are. As in Hobbit sized. A meter and change if that. So here I come jogging along and she is lugging her weight in coal. Who on earth could not help in this situation? It was the “lady across the street” moment of Mongolia. Seriously it was. Think about it. Whats the thing scouts do? We help old ladies cross streets. Well in this country we don’t have a whole hell of a lot of streets and every kid scout or not knows how to start a fire and tie every knot on the planet from the age of three. So what do we do as scouts in this country since we have the American scout stuff burned into our memory? We help women carry their coal to their ger. That’s what I did. Really it was not trouble at all. The bags were sturdy enough and with a bag on each shoulder I walked along side this nice old lady who I had never had the pleasure of meeting from my little town before. We chatted away idly in Mongolian while walking too. Yes I had rested well…yes the weather was wonderful…yes I was running because I like to run…yes I am an American part of a teacher helping program…yes students and work are always good…and so on. A kilometer later we had reached her ger and he two grandsons ran out and grabbed the coal bags off my shoulder. The woman held out her arms to me. I figured she wanted to hold hands or hug me (at least in my part of Mongolia outside your direct family you never touch) but she grabbed me close and then sniffed both my cheeks (the Mongolian equivalent of a kiss) and waved me goodbye. Some days I talk about how lousy teaching at the school feels, how its not the reason I joined the Peace Corps. The reaction I got from this woman I had never met. The way I think from now on a woman as old as my Grandmother in America who had never even spoken to a foreigner before got to speak to an American in Mongolian about day to day life in town and how her only memory of me is giving her a hand taking a coal supply from one side of town to the other….THAT is why I joined the Peace Corps. THAT is what is worth giving up your dream job in America…THAT is how you bring about world peace. You don’t care about the big picture, you dedicate yourself to the grassroots, for better or for naught you help those to no greater end and to those who may in the end not even know your name…. When people ask me about the Peace Corps and what I did. Aside from maybe on a job interview I am not going to tell them about the teaching aspect of my time here. No I am going to tell you the American taxpayers dollars were spent allowing me to help old Mongolian women carry bags of coal. That it helped me introduce old Mongolian women to Americans for the first time in their long lives. That they actually got to see one of us in action on a day to day life and how we are really no different from the overwhelming majority of the people on the planet….thats worth more than a thousand well paid teachers, or all the wireless internet the earth can suck down on. It’s a good day. A really really good day.

March 13, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Ill not mince words here: I miss sex. Now yes to those keeping track via my blog its only been six months. I’ve had much longer dry spells than this before, but last time I had sex was far too enjoyable and it was with one of the hotter women who I have even been able to retain their attention too. Today I sort of sat reading an email Esther sent me from Hong Kong and just thought…dammit, ive never really missed sex like I do now.

Id like some professional opinions on this. (medical doctors please chime in) Do most people not realize how much they like sex until the hit their 30’s? I was a bit of a late bloomer, could that be why as well? Is it weather/exercise related? Is it because I didn’t get into shape until I was 25? Is it the thrill of seeing German women in the coming months? (relax I have less than 2 weeks there, nothing is going to happen and I know it) Could this be related to the idea this is the first time in my life that I have detached sexual desire from love? Is it because in this one particular case I have never found myself getting such a degree of pleasure from a woman? (TMI?) Additionally and far more importantly relating to my problem what the hell do I do regardless of the reason why?!?!

….next time I do Peace Corps in Germany, or a nation with women I am particularly attracted to!

Speaking of which: 10 days until my German vacation. The wind is back to full force here in Mongolia and I am glad for a small chunk of it I will find myself in Germany. Warmer weather, no wind, good running paths and plenty of tasty beer. Paradise! By the time I get back at the start of April it is only 3 weeks until graduation!

Tonight for dinner instead of using money to buy beer I bought some Chimjuu (bell peppers) Songin (onion) and Luuvan (carrots) to make a decent salad topped with extremely bitter Italian Salad dressing I created myself (I am not complaining of the taste of the dressing, its just a flavor sensation you rarely get around here) I also cut up some bread and had some nice Bruschetta with some hummus to boot. Just need a different climate, an ocean some olives and wine and you wouldn’t even need to know its Monoglia!

This upcoming week I plan to have an easy end to the third quarter. Ill show the kids a movie called “Mousehunt” on Monday and for Thursday and Friday ill test the kids on their directions by having them move “forward, back, left, right” for me. Ill do a UB run on the weekend to get my clothes and affairs in order and then I am heading back on next moday or Tuesday to catch that radical plane ride.

Fun closing fact. Once I have taken a plane from Ulan Bator to Munich, I will have finally gone all the way around the world. I have been as far east as Greece and was far west as the Similian Islands in the Indian Ocean, but I never really have gone all the way around. This trip will close that gap forever. Go me!!!!!

March 14, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

The wind is out in full fury the past couple of days. It has totally knocked off my exercise routine unfortunately, thank goodness I got that long run in. Seriously the wind is shaking the very foundation of my ger as I type this. It rises and falls, squeezes and bends. You really see that roundness of the ger stemmed from nothing than the sheer need to keep their homes upright. I checked the weather and its supposed to stay like this until I leave for Germany. Common Josh, its one lousy week left and then as much vacation as you can cram into the period of eleven days.

“Mousehunt” went over very well with both students and teachers in my school. Its good ole slapstick comedy of two funny guys trying to get rid of a mouse. Seriously what could go wrong right? I got them to write out ten English words of things they knew from the movie so I could call it an English lesson. Ill show them the second half Thursday and then Friday….meh, ill think of something. See Josh? Its not even Tuesday and the week is already sort of over!

March 15, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Nothing really to do today. The wind remains too brutal to run a whole lot and without classes I also REALLY am trying to stop using the internet. The only thing in the news now is that terrible meltdown in Japan and all it does is make me feel bad. Tomorrow ill have some classes, that will distract me.

I think I need to make 2 UB trips. Ill go on the weekend for some R+R as well as getting a package from the Peace Corps office and get all my winter clothes a good machine wash. (Don’t need them anymore) Ill drag it all back on Monday, and then on Tuesday get back to UB for my trip to the Airport the next morning. I promise I have not been counting the minutes to this thing, its just the only thing I can really think to type about when I sit down and start writing. The book is not going as well as I hoped. Writing about my early interest in Peace Corps is hard because I never really wrote it all down, and I have changed so much that sometimes it is hard for me to actually recall how I felt from the beginning….still, nothing but time to spare so nothing too big of a deal.

The news from Japan is getting worse and worse. Not good…worse still there really is not a whole hell of a lot to be done by anyone but those actually on the ground itself trying to get some water on these plants. Foxnews is critiquing our President for going on a golf trip while the Middle East riots and the Japan meltdown takes place….what exactly do they suggest? That he hold a fire hose or something? Where was this critique when our former president spent over one third of his presidency at his Texas ranch…America your memory and attention span is the equivalent of me when I was nine years old.

March 16, 2011. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

“Damn Cheap Chinese toothbrush. They can make a chicken taste like an Orange but when it comes to oral hygene they really phone it in.” –American Dad

I found out what both my American and Mongolian bank balances are. Relative to how poor I usually feel I was pleasantly surprised. I love when that happens! So I now have both plenty of Mongolian dough which I plan to spend on some luxury items I am also going to probably be able to go on my side trip to Vienna. I actually have been toying with the idea of going to some of the smaller towns of Bavaria and trying their starkbiers as well, and while I shamelessly both love this festival and this beer that may be a little too clingy even for me. Jury’s out, but I better figure out soon. Ill be in Germany in a weeks time.

Teaching goes well. Not a whole lot to report about that. I got a grant proposal out to buy more toys for our kindergardeners but they are going to move into our school next year (my town is building a new school for secondary education the coming year) and they will have plenty of room to wiggle about. I know a lot of bad things are happening in the world around me right now. The meltdowns, the likelihood of an American second recession thanks to the oil price spike, the famines, the uncertain days to come…but I tell you living in a small Mongolian town has a way of allowing you to ignore so much. It allows you to be happy, especially at the cost of forces beyond my control and at no cost to the moment of happiness I experience of the smallest victories. Buddha would be very happy for me about that. I know how some of my entries must sound, but I promise you I am not a Buddhist. I imagine my rampant drinking would immediately disqualify me from his good graces anyway. May tomorrow bring yet another wonderful day like today…or not…whatever.

March 17, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

“Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing…” –Dammit why the hell did a fictional car have to make such an accurate statement. It makes my quotes seem so stupid…yea they kinda are…

Ive been in Peace Corps too long. Too often I have been thinking of things to do in Germany and then fold when I think of the price. Screw it, im going for the cool stuff. Ill land on the 23rd, get a Unimator (it’s a beer) and then the next morning get on a train to Vienna. Ill spend two days there, including one where I go to a couchsurfers party. I haven’t actually been on that group very long but now that I looked at it I cant believe I was not on this sooner. By the by, as I am on it now if anyone swings by Bagakhangai my floor is completely at your disposal! So after those two days ill come back and spend a night drinking it up in Munich, then on the 27th ill take the train up north to Nuremberg. I have been there before and while there is no festival it’s a wonderful town and another couchsurfer meeting is taking place so ill drop in for that. Then on the 29th ill go back to Munich where there is yet another couchsurfer event taking place. The following four days ill go on long runs in the English Garden and along the Isar river and by night get falling down drunk on good beer. Less than a week away!

March 18, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

“that’s a German thing right? You guys like climbing mountains.” –Brad Pitt

Hehe…so something funny happened. The are remaking the movie “Red Dawn” for the modern age. We all know Red Dawn right? Soviets take over America…teens run for the hill…”Wolverines!”…all that good stuff right? Well for the modern remake we obviously cant be conqured by the Soviets anymore so China became the next big enemy.

None of this is new, and the movie is all but in the can. However, a plot twist of the modern age has sprung up. People don’t want the idea of China and America at war, so much so they are rewriting the plot of the movie so that thanks to some form of coup the North Koreans are leading the assault (with the assistance of their puppet allies such as China) this means that all the China flags and Mandarin spoken during the film is being post edited to be North Korean flags and Korean spoken… hehe…

The entire plot of Red Dawn is far fetched to begin with, but I am sorry this is going to destroy the movie…not that I imagine it will be all that good anyway. Were so afraid of making a fictional movie of superpowers fighting that they change whole movie plots! Lighten up everybody would you!

This does however mean now that the plot of the new “Red Dawn” will be shockingly similar to a video game now available in America called “Homefront” I have watched the gameplay on youtube. The main character you play is a guy with the last name Jacobs…how touching.

Today is the end of the third Quarter. UB trip this weekend, back Monday, back to UB Tuesday, Munich by noon on Wednesday. I have to think of something to do with my laptop. It’s a piece of garbage but I still require it to work for typing and interviews and the like. Hidden in my ger seems the most prudent. If I give it to my school to hang on to they will probably use it, and no offense town but I don’t really trust you all that much especially with a tempermental laptop.

Anyways, today is Soldiers Day, which also kind of doubles as “Mens Day” as well. There is a very nice pony show in which every veteran walks around in a dell with their decorations displayed and those in active service either put on the blue uniform (the womens uniform looks like something a flight attendant would wear) and they all march and salute and stuff like that. The officer members look like SS officers. The holiday celebrating the soldiers is very nice, but guys pretty much use it as an excuse to drink excessively. I hate it. I passed three mobs of drunken men on my way home from school today. I don’t recognize them, never spoken to the majority of the time and their large numbers brought out the absolutely infuriating machoism all Mongolian men carry. They are all crotch grabbing douches in that state calling me a woman and demanding I buy them more vodka.

I almost always drink alone in this country. Naturally I agree that this under normal circumstance is a sign of alcoholism, Maybe I actually an alcoholic who has never done anything unforgivable under the influence….but in this country if you are a Peace Corps Volunteer and you live in a town as the only foreigner drinking alone is a survival tool.

You think drunken Americans are annoying ladies? We don’t hold a candle to Mongolian men when it comes to being obnoxious hands down ill take a mob of tanked Americans over Mongolian men anyday. I think my medical officer would be glad to know that because I am the only foreigner in town that I drink alone. This goes beyond social order and into health too. My outhouse “sickle” is covered in blood, and it sure the hell is not mine…good gods why do they do this to themselves? Believe me I am the LAST person you will hear telling people not to drink. I myself have taken down whole bottles of liquor by myself at times as well. Yet let me tell you, the very second I go to the outhouse in the morning (gods bless my insane regularity) and I see blood…oh I am headed straight for sobriety! Common guys, quit killing yourselves this way…so unnecessary.

Postscript: 9pm

By the by I am officially upgrading my family condition from estranged to full on separated. Dad is not taking it very well, and as he uses my phone on a daily basis to attempt to contact my mother with unsuccessful and usually angry results I have begun to stop buying more time on my phone. Instead I let him use it, realize I have no tugriks on it and it usually means he retreats to his ger unhappy. Don’t get me wrong, midday my dad is a cheery, happy go lucky type but when he comes over to use my phone he is in the foulest moods, and trust me he is never more annoying than at that time. As I type this he is right now spent the last 25 minutes calling pretty much anyone he knows seeing if they can help pinpoint where my mother is right now. Luckily I can play both the fool and the foreigner and just let his fit come to its end. He’s not violent or even a drinker but if I ask for my phone back or tell him he has outstayed his welcome that would not end well. I obviously don’t know the specifics of what is going on, but it is safe to say that this is a problem he wants to fix but cannot. I have a gut instinct that his wife is simply done with him, and that nothing he says will change her mind.

The matter is beyond his control, and when you think about it there really is no greater frustration one can come across then that right? Its so out of context, but it even reminds me of my difficulty with Rachael. I see my Mongolian father sitting on the floor of my ger right now as I type this chain smoking away as he tries to call yet another person fruitlessly to get in touch with her and I wonder if this is how I appeared to my mother years ago when I sat in her basement for months crying and drinking because I had no actual way of addressing a difficulty with someone who would not speak to me anymore. I pity him, and can only imagine that is what everyone else has done who has seen me in my lesser of days of woe.

March 21, 2011. Nayras Café, Mongolia.

So, a little back and forth between me and UB and now my ger is full of clean winter clothes, some of which may never see use again as well as the logistics of having everything ready for my vacation locked away. I just came from the Peace Corps office and gave them a copy of all my hostels, rail and plane tickets, the idea naturally being to know WHERE I might go wrong if things end up missing.

Additionally, I got to find out that if I am interested in Peace Corps again in 2012 that all my medical information will indeed be able to transit over, including dental! The fortune that will save me. Also it turns out as an RPCV and willing to work any real field means that yes Geographically I can be a little more precise the second round. That was all excellent to hear. A good omen of my upcoming vacation. I am packing rather bare boned for the trip, but it will allow me the maximum amount of dexterity and the like.

The computer should be safe locked away at the guesthouse here. Ten days without a computer will do me some good. I think ill sober up the next few days while here. Stay in, drink lots of water, eat some good pizza….pregame so to speak. Theres a lot on my mind, but ill be honest I really am going to put all my worries of the future on backburner for a few weeks and just really get a good breather to help me strengthen up for my last few months of Peace Corps service.

Ill upload this to the blog now, make a vacation post when I get back. PICTURES!!!!!

Its now 21 months since i flew to Mongolia. Thats the longest ive ever not been to a German festival since 2005, and it also means that i miss this annoyingly catchy song so i decided to show the English languages roots by teaching "Viva Colonia" to my students.(For the record English was basically German with French used for higher class words because of the aristocracy. I Know that sounds dumbed down but i swear thats a pretty accurate statement)

The video shows me teaching the song with terribly written German and then Hohner is below playing it. Im sorry i dont have any shots of the kids, but we just started to learn the song and i needed to walk them through it so i couldn't play with my computer camera that much.

Ill spend tomorrow getting them to practice this song too. I should feel bad teaching them a song that encourages drinking, but then again "Yankee Doodle Dandee" was a drinking song too. Next year for my next Peace Corps service ill teach "Cowboy und Indianier" by Olaf Henning! I am less than 2 weeks away from Starkbierfest!!!!!!!

February 11, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Today’s Quote: “If I take one step further, itll be the farthest from home ive ever been.” –Sam Gangee.

Month….twenty. 20. Twenty months of Peace Corps service. Twenty months outside of America. I am glad this particular monthly anniversary took place on a Friday, it gave me time to actually write out a little bit about this. Before joining the Peace Corps I would have considered myself a well traveled individual. Honduras, the Carribean, all up and down and across the United States, Hawaii, all of Europe both with parents and by myself. Greece, even Southeast Asia. Ive been to plenty of places, but my service has demonstrated just how short a period of time I had actually spent either in travel or in living somewhere other than my place of origin.

Prior to Peace Corps service the overwhelming majority of my trips had involved less than a few weeks of travel. My longest trip taking around four or so months when I had gone through Thailand, Cambodia and Vietnam in the fall of 2006 after my meltdown. I used to remember how long that time had felt, even being somewhat of a vacation. Now however, i have passed that period of time in something that was not a vacation and doubled it several times over. I have been outside of the country over 5 times longer than I ever had before, living this time in a sub-zero tent than a Muay Thai bungaloo.

In that’s scene in the movie, when Samwise Gamgee is standing next to the scarecrow in the field at the Shire, realizing that he was as far away from everything he knew as he had ever been, that first step afterward looked to be so very awkward. Like every step that followed would be no different. He hadn’t even left the shire at that point, and he would travel the entire span of his world before he would return back. I take a person note of amusement in that their journey (there and back) had taken exactly 13 months to the day. Ive been at it a little longer, but in all fairness I don’t have a ring!

I don’t parallel my time in Peace Corps to Lord of the Rings. I just see how to those willing to leave their zone of comfort, find a form a strength unlike that of those who use routine and previous reliability to protect them. When you live in the same place and do the same thing again and again the routine becomes both your comfort and your strength. You become the master of that to which you are tasked. When you are on a great adventure of your life, you have no such mastery. Every day I find myself struggling to do things as easily as Mongolians a quarter of my age have already mastered. Instead though, when doing that which is not routine you begin to realize just how little you need to actually feel strong and safe. It’s a long road ive been on, and I do not refer to just Peace Corps service when I say that… I hated change more than any other person I knew for well over half of my life. I think near the twilight of my puberty the hemispheres of my brain switched at the last possible second. I shiver at the thought of how I was likely going to turn out too if that had not happened.

Despite how every day feels like an adventure and even boring days take a lot to be comfortable and certain of my purpose I feel a calmness within me I lacked before. As my months in Peace Corps pass I do not see myself interested in leaving, nor trying to stay on longer in the current role I have, and so I feel as though no matter how things unfold I am willing to support that which follows. Good for me huh?

This weekend I go into town to gather some English resources with my counterpart out of my own pocket. I make an additional 50,000 tugriks a month thanks to our bump in Peace Corps living allowance. 50,000 tugriks buys a LOT of textbooks in this country that otherwise would not have been bought. I had been living off my old salary fine, so my choices were that I could either buy some English textbooks for my kids that could be used for years and years after my time here is up…. or I could go buy some more booze to drink. Don’t think too highly of me, a flipped coin made up my mind for me.

February 12, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

100,000 tugriks. Around 70 or eighty dollars. Over a third of what I make each month. I could have bought a LOT of good beer for that amount or SOME really nice vodkas and whiskeys or even a LITTLE of the good wine with that amount of money. Or…as I did I went with Sarango to buy some English textbooks that she and my school will be able to use for a long long time after I am gone to improve their English skills.

What can I say, I am probably not the greatest Peace Corps Volunteer to ever exist but I have my moments.

I met Sarango at the ass crack of dawn of 6:40am. Ohf….probably the thing I hate most about teaching was how early it always began. I remember having to get up at 5:30 when I worked at Robinson High School so I could shower, shave and then walk the 5 kilometers to school so I was in time to get everything together. I was also working two other jobs at the time…im old now and even doing it once drained me. Bleh.

I try to think about the traits I have and whether I got them from my mother or my father. This is always tricky business. My mom and dad are both under 5’10. Neither are particularly quirky. Neither in their younger years were particularly ADHD. Both real salt of the earth types which I am not. Only a few things I think stand out. I think I got my dose of paranoia from my mom along with some other behavior traits from my mom. I guess I got the eyes and my great grandfather on my Dad’s side was quite tall too but theres one trait I didn’t get from my dad that I wish I had. My dad is really one of “those” people. Gifted with a talent loathed by those like myself that do not have it. My dad is a morning person! Lucky bugger!

I digress once again…

Still, it was my first time taking the train. Sarango kind of used me as a way for her to get a free ride/meal/errand in UB, but heck, ive been used in worse ways in Mongolia before. The train sort of overshot the station at Bagakhangai so we all had to run to get to the last car, once there we had to walk through over 10 cars to reach the seat portion of the train where we had tickets. It was sort of like walking to UB.

Maybe its just my time in Europe but I will say the trains in Mongolia are a little disappointing to me. Nice views and everything, but these trains need to run through everything from sweltering heat to -60 winter storms and so they are really built for durability more than comfort or style. No matter, it still got me to where I needed to go. On our walk through the train we first passed the “soft sleeper” beds and I will say I am quite pleased with the type of lodging my mother will be using to travel to Beijing once she finishes seeing me.

Oh wait, I haven’t written about that yet. My mother…my….mom…my loving, ambitious, mildly crazy mother, whose overwhelming trips out of America have been to Caribbean islands is going to make her first trip to Asia….by going to Ulaanbaatar! Seriously shes not even going to go to China first and ease her way to the wild country of Mongolia. Nope, shes getting off the plane in Beijing (BUSINESS CLASS!!!!) and then catch the next flight to UB. And I thought I was the one who didn’t do things half assed huh! Mother like son…not really but in vague ways yes.

There is no talking her out of it, and I get that “well my sons there and its now or never” but still! So she wants to come see me along with a female friend of hers the last week of May. I like that my mom is traveling with at least one other person…but…I mean this is Mongolia! Im an able bodied 6’4 man who actually can speak to my fellow Mongolian and this place intimidates even me sometimes. My mom is inching towards 60 for cryin aloud! Sky Father watch over her please. Earth Mother why don’t you get in on that too!?

So her initial goal is to land in UB, spend about 4 days with me as I find some tour group that will at least show her the countryside life and some nice scenery. I was worried my mom would want to do something bold and adventurous like I did at Khovsgul Lake, but she luckily has mentioned that she might need to find some sort of “cart adventure” as she does not want to ride all day. Given the types of horses and how close I came to getting myself killed last year this was music to my ears. I think ill try to find a group that does this thing where Yak’s pull carts of dismantled gers and supplies out into the countryside and then build a ger and you have a camping experience. That sounds authentic and diverse in various experiences without putting her in much risk.

Then I put them on a train where the two of them will share a sleeper bed thingy into Beijing and then see that country as well through a tour group. I am still in Peace Corps for that time so the two of them will have to conquer China on their own. Not that I would be much help as I don’t speak the language nor have I been there. I figure that’s a week trip of my own to do at the end of my service if I have the money and am not pressed for time.

My dad has a much safer strategy: “Take lots of pictures, ill rent a beach house when you get back to the states and you can show me them there.” Well played sir! Sharky’s pizza and some cheerwine too plz! Ill bring my dad back a warbow antique to put on his wall too!

Anyways, one thing at a time, back to going to UB…

I also found a wonderful store in UB called “good price” A misleading name for a store that basically sells all food American, and naturally charges for the privilege. It does mean though that for 6000 tugriks I am now the owner of a full bottle of real deal Tabasco sauce. I dropped a dab on my tongue tonight and….WOLF! The flavor and sensation of spice….REAL spice poured back into me. Wild fun. The place also sells liquors I forgot existed. Bottles of Jack Daniels for around 20 US dollars. Is that a lot? Ive never been a whiskey drinker, heck im not even really a liquor drinker, but just the uniqueness of seeing Jack Daniels in Mongolia made me almost buy the thing. I luckily had other things that needed to be bought instead. I may like my beer and my wine, but its moments like that that can assure you your not an alcoholic, at least by non-American standards.

We bought the books, Sarango and I had some great conversations, and I was back in time to catch the meeker heading back into town. It was a really good day.

February 13, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Sunday in Bagakhagai. It’s a beautiful day outside but still too cold to go out recreationally. The absence of the wind this year really does wonders though. Maybe last year was just really bad but this year the wind is almost feeling like its non existent. No crawling to the stores, no iced over eyebrows, in essence its just….cold. Not even all that cold either. Not even sub-zero during the day! Such a nice way to go through my second Mongolian winter. Though I dare believe that come March and April the wind will indeed pick up.

My school’s wireless network is down. They are not exactly sure what the problem is and the guys who set it up from UB haven’t made their way here. It means that on weekends the only way for me to use the internet is to go inside the teachers office itself, which is under lock and key with the key kept by my boss. My boss usually (like today) goes to UB on the weekend. Heck, anyone with monies pretty much goes to UB on the weekend in this town. They are all surprised how rarely (once a month) I go to UB. She took her key with her, and so while I am currently ten feet away from the source of workable internet I cannot use as such.

On the up side, it has afforded me time to write more. My computer is still unable to play anything but the most basic of video games (dos-box type. Mostly pre 1995 games.) so I find my computer use to be mildly incapacitated. Ah well, ill use the money of my end of service to buy another top end computer and video games of the PS3 that have come out during my term of service. Only four months left in this country… wows.

Peace Corps sent us an email asking those interested in applying for a third year or who want to be PCVL’s to apply. Im not going to apply. No point. Ive been rejected for every one of the training staff positions and I get that I screwed up at the beginning of my service, but I think if I am going to be successful in my ambitions like that I need to return to the states, apply again to Peace Corps to another country and start fresh and this time NOT act like a complete brat when I get assigned my placement! Not angry about it anymore, just a little regretful of how I had acted. It was unnecessary, and I know that I am better than that.

Like all bad ideas…it seemed like a good idea at the time.

Again, that line above is one of the rare times where I create my own original quote.

February 14, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I tell yea. You don’t use internet for one lousy weekend and Egypt’s military overthrows its government! It reminds me of last year around this time when I had only monthly internet access. Id look up CNN and a whole new list of celebrities were gay, some had died, and massive changes in government had all taken place without my knowledge. This was just a smaller dose of the same thing.

So heres a history lesson for you. Long time ago a lot of people were pagan. Actually a lot were not pagan but some did, and the rest were either atheist or maybe in a cult. Anyways, Caesar (at the time named Claudius II) was a Pagan in the 200’s, but there was one such cult that was gaining a little more ground than the others had. They believed that there was this guy who had been a Jewish carpenter who claimed that he was the son of god and that the 2nd coming was happening really soon. (Actually it was pretty much supposed to happen right after he died, but that part just sorta got swept under the rug) So now there were acolytes of this Christian faith in Rome walking around telling Pagans that their own faith was better and such. He liked to mention how much he loved the followers of Christ and all that good stuff.

Claudius didn’t like that. There was one priest in particular that was getting on his nerves named Valentine. This one was even marrying Christians together meaning there was going to be even more of these monotheists! So Claudius arranged for Valentine to be beheaded on February 14th. And so valentines day was born….we celebrate the day a religious man got his head cut off. Somehow we turned that into a holiday in which we buy each other chocolate and flowers. They actually also took a pagan holiday in which certain women were whipped/flayed for sexual pleasure (though the college class that taught me that was so long ago the name and details elude me.) Christianity did that, as do pretty much all new religions. They put their holidays over old ones to help with the transition of casual faith believers. What can I say, part of the fun of being a historian is getting to know why we do so many of the stupid things we actually do.

Speaking of stupid, I am beginning…no not beginning rather am convinced that the government center of Bagakhangai is not doing its job. Why? Because my school does it! Lotta people who don’t even really live in town have been in the lounge of our school today. They come with their ID’s from the countryside to get as far as I can tell some kind of “subsidy” money from the government. It turns a small teachers room into a place of noise and commotion. They are all surprised to see a white guy on a computer and they hover like being close to me will further help them understand this entry that I am writing. I find it annoying.

February 15, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

NOOOO!!!! I knew I had put it off too long. It was going to be one of the most disgusting photographs I was going to take during my entire time in Peace Corps. I was even going to find a way to put it into a book that I am writing too. But alas, I put off taking the photo too long and now the chance of a lifetime is gone forever.

…the “shitsicle” is no more. Now in all fairness the outhouse in our yard had gotten pretty damn bad. It wasent even just up to the floorboards it was protruding as well, but dangit I wanted to take a photo of it.

It does mean that at some point over last night (on valentines day) my host father must have gone into the sub level (actually not as bad as you think as everything is frozen solid) and literally chopped the thing down at its base. Damn shame, would have been a photo so disgusting it would have freaked everybody out stateside.

February 16, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

“Anyone can make a throne out of bayonets, the trouble is sitting on it afterwards.” –Boris Yeltsin

On Tuesday’s and Wednesdays my school only has one active English class. We have tutorings and some kid always needs me to help them fix their One Laptop Per Child Laptops but as per actually classroom work there is only 4th grade once each day. The counterpart I work with is actually a very nice teacher, but she is rather old school.

As well she should! She has been teaching in Mongolia since before I was born. She used to be the Russian language teacher, but as times changed and she read the writing on the wall she learned how to teach grammatic English and works both schools as both the Russian and the English teacher. As I said before, I have learned to pick my battles and to not get frustrated in it, and after MANY failed attempts to try to get the two of us to work in unison in a team teaching exercise I have abandonded such efforts. I just cant get her in any capacity to teach with me at the same time. She just would regiment half the class to me and half the class to her.

So for a while she and I have just taken one day each. She teaches Tuesday and I teach Wednesday. Commonly she runs the kids through a reading and writing set of drills and then the following day I teach the kids a song or get them to play simon says or some other type of non-grammatic form of lesson. Its not perfect, but this is what Peace Corps teaches us about when they say that the change comes slowly, if it comes at all.

This week she has suggested a new style she wants to try. She will teach both classes one week and I will teach both the following. Again I just let it go, and my other counterpart is awesome and so interested in working with me. I just wish I knew how I could connect closer with my other counterpart. Still, she seems perfectly cordial to me, so I cant be that mad.

It does mean though today I have no official class, so I decided instead to book my guesthouse reservation in Munich. I may not spend all my time in Munich but as a festival is taking place around that time I didn’t want to take any chances. Besides, in March/April a bed at a guesthouse in Germany is incredibly low. 11 day stay at a hostel one block from the central train station costs $200. That’s under 20 bucks a day. Believe me, for Europe it’s a good deal.

As for what else to do while in Europe, that I am coming up a little bit of a blank. I think I will take my mom’s advice and bring my running shoes. At first I was not sure about the idea, but now that I think of it a little running exercise in the English Garden would feel wonderful after all the drinking and eating. Out and about, fresh air, cherries, a beer with an 8% alcohol content, chesses, maybe even get back in touch with some old friends who live around that place.

And the women….. oh good gods the women! You know how I wrote a long time ago that Mongolian women are not exactly my type? Not saying they are ugly, and in fact I have (usually in UB) seen plenty of Mongolian women I would say I was attracted to, but all in all we have a type and Mongolian women usually are not my type. But German women….ooohhhh.

Maybe its my own German heritage, or just the cool ones I keep bumping into when I travel, or maybe I just have a type and in both looks and personality they always seem to fill it but German women are hands down the most attractive women on the planet. Period! In their young adulthood German girls are all with beautiful skin and bright smiles. They either have long flowing hair that makes them look almost elvish or angelic and the chiseled faces only add to their look. Its either long and flowing or they cut their hair to their ears, spike the tips and grow a grin that makes them look almost like predators in nature. Both styles I love. Even as a firey eyed predator German women, and actually all Germans for that matter have a similar trait. They have the upmost respect for law and authority. They don’t not cross at a crosswalk….like anyone! I miss that as well. People unnecessarily obeying the law. I don’t get that all that much around where I live now.

German women like to listen to foreigners try to speak German. I can still remember when my stepfather came with me to a beer festival and this gorgeous 22 year old woman literally started chatting my 60 year old Stepfather up when he uttered the 20 words of German he knew and talked about his home in San Mateo. I was very proud of my stepfather that evening.

It’s the women who even if they are at a beer hall table with three guy friends she is the one who will introduce herself and then include you in her band of merry men and perhaps other women. They have the metabolism that lets them eat and drink like men twice their size and they still can carry you home after you have had one too many (believe me I know) As they reach their 30’s they keep their smiles but their faces start to become lightly impish and their bodies somehow fill out even more. They still never get drunk and instead watch as men their own age continue to drink themselves to excess in their company, and they giggle among one another as you make a fool of yourself trying to impress them.

Even in middle age German women have surprises in store for you. They grow a little heavier as their diet finally overtakes their metabolism but they also cut their hair short and dye their hair. Not blonde mind you, but green, or red or gold or any other wild color you can think of. Seriously, like Milla Jovovich in “The Fifth Element” these 50 year old women whose wide smile is replaced by a serenity like grin. There are always smiling, I miss people who just smile in public, that does not happen a lot around here.

Even in late March the weather will be more than warm enough for me to buy a half kilo of cherries, sit down on a bench at the cobble streets of Munich, and watch the most stunning women on the planet just walk on by. Then at the Paulaner beer hall I can see all the Bavarian women strutting around in their traditional dresses…sorry if you’ve never been you have no idea what I am talking about. Its been a few months since I got to admire the site of a woman I was sincerely attracted to so there was a little more for me to write then I though there would be.

I suppose I could go see Vienna or Prague, but I don’t know. Money is of course a consideration but also just the idea that as a vacation going into the wild and unknown may not feel that enjoyable. Ugh, I sound like such an old guy when I say that! I better go brush off my German though, I haven’t had to say a word of it since the Summer of 2009. “Ich bin friedenskorps lehrer” “das auto is schwarz” “Ich liebe Viva Colonia und Cowboy und Indianier”

…Oh yea, German girls are gonna be falling all over me with terminology like that!

February 17, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I was raised throughout my childhood and young adult years in the city of Vienna…Virginia. Bet during the war they thought up a funny way of saying it so they wouldn’t be associated with the other place that we were fighting against.

So after typing up everything I wrote yesterday I decided to humor myself and see how much a train ticket from Munich to Vienna would cost. In all my trips to Europe in the past I have never actually gotten into Austria. The closest I ever got to was atop of the Bavarian Alps where the Eagle Nest was created for Mr. Hilter (I did that on purpose). Now it’s a restaurant and a place for tourists to snap photos. I recall ages ago looking up the price of a summer train ticket between the two towns and the price had been absolutely ridiculous. Something close to a hundred Euros for a one way ticket. So I punched in all the data and looked up the price. I checked it over several times. The ticket would cost…29 Euro…for a direct trip between the citys two main train stations. The trip from the Munich train station to the city is the same amount for a round trip. Same price coming back…hostels cost around 12 Euro a nite in that city in the month of Spring too….dammit am I going to Vienna? I may very well be getting around to doing that!

Good, so I will be going somewhere new during all of this. That’s decent sounding. It would be cool to look around for sites from “Before Sunrise.” I can also ask my stepfather as I recall he recently traveled there and hopefully could tell me a cool place or two that would be worth my time.

Late March/Early April is getting more and more exciting each day!

Okay, enough vacation stuff, lets get back to the matter of Peace Corps. In a couple weeks Peace Corps turns 50, or at least the real 50. Its hard to give Peace Corps an official birthday, mostly because its hard to decide what was the “start date” Some might argue that it was one of the many projects JFK and his followers created as part of “The Great Society”

Fair warning, I need to digress on this for a minute. “The Great Society” I love that title, it really does describe what I think was trying to happen in the early 60’s. I don’t refer to those who were the Vietnam protesters or those who spent all of the 60’s listening to new rock and roll music and took the carnal and drug like benefits of a liberal minded society and left the rest to whoever was listening to politicians. I mean those educated and dedicated liberal minded people inspired by a charming young Pesident and those people who actually understood that to truly change the world for the betterment of all that it would begin at the most simplistic unit: A single person willing to help. Comedian Lewis Black is a great example of this. He didn’t join the Peace Corps, but he did work on a Great Society project. He lived and worked with low income families in Appalachian America trying to get job training and family support for their children. He was paid pretty much nothing, and his project was shut down in under a few years when funding ran dry. In his book “Nothings Sacred” he even rants about how he still tries to envision us trying to sell the idea of helping people…because they asked for help. I know crazy right?

The Great Society had other projects in it too. Putting astronauts in space and eventually on the moon. I know it was a space race of technical superiority to our military enemies, but I think there is another element to our exploration of space some people are not aware of. That race may have had a ridiculous component to it that fueled it, but I would like to point out that this was not an all or nothing bet. Had America not won the race to the moon a human being still would have set foot on another sphere in this galaxy regardless of nationality.

Consider this: Space exploration is NOT profitable. Its not…nor going to be for hundreds of years either. Only now are there even beginning to be commercial flights into space by private companies because it is profitable. The long and deep look into space is something that will never bring back profits like Cortez did. These trips of exploration remind me of when James Cook took a ship to the other side of the planet in a rickety old boat so that he could scientifically take note of an eclipse. Literally that’s all he really did. It cost the British public fortunes in their taxes to pay for such a quest, and the individual benefit it brought to the British public was negligible.

So my libertarian friends would remark, why do we do this then? Why not keep the money we would otherwise be taxed and often wasted so we can all pursue our fortunes in our own special ways. For instance if the British government had not undertaken the endeavour of observing the Transit of Venus eventually someone who actually needed such information (most likely a trading company or something of the like) would have handled that. By the by, I equate libertarians to the old school philosophy of the Republican party before the second half of the 20th century threw everyones American politics for a loop. (Ronald Regan used to be a Democrat…so was Strom Thurmond!)

Space exploration and other such “impossible” projects is something we as a society should contribute to for a different reason than money. We should because it is things like going to the moon in a decade that demonstrates to ourselves and those we consider our children just how possible absolutely everything is. When we come together in such ways, we do something like we did in the 60’s. We invented technology that did not even exist at the beginning of a decade and in 9 years and with a computer weaker than your calculator flew 250,000 miles to a twirling orbiting ball around our planet and walked on its surface. We did that over forty years ago… take that same drive and determination, add in all of our technological advances over the last 40 years, and imagine focusing it in any other category of human discovery with the same degree of zeal we had in the 1960’s for space exploration. DNA, deep sea exploration, alternative and permanent energy sources, longevity, cure for cancer, coexistence programs, world hunger.

Maybe its just that I was not alive during its time and therefore can innocently grandise it into something that it is not, but I think its times like this when I realize why I am and remain a liberal. Individually and kept free from the obstructions and distractions of others, man is capable of great things. This is true, but when we agree to work together, really work together. When we forsake our own fortunes and initial desires for the hope, perhaps sometimes even slight hope of a community based goal…well…

We have the chance to all become something equivalent to a God itself. We become more than the sum of our individual bits, and we create and accomplish things that could never have existed or have ever happened.

That sounds like a god to me. Maybe that is why I am also kind of an atheist these days too. I am far too impressed with just how limitless our potential is.

…okay rant over…where were we? Yea so some would say Peace Corps was born when JFK became President and “The Great Society” got underway.

Others would argue the Peace Corps was born back in October of 2010 when JFK gave “The Peace Corps Speech” What is that you ask? Well if memory serves JFK was at a University and he gave the idea for a new government program of volunteer workers. He called it a “Peace Corps” I say that term a lot in the course of my job. I still just try to imagine what everyone listening to the man at the time he said it thought. The Peace Corps… So often the term “Corps” referring to a branch of a military organization that is assigned to a particular line of work. Instead it was going to be people, pretty much going and living somewhere poor and doing their best to give instruction and guidance to those seeking new skills and forms of understanding. It must have been such a thing to hear that man speak aloud.

Finally, we come to a day that actually had a real deal “event” so to speak. On March 1st, 1961, on the lawn of the White House itself, with JFK himself standing before them, the very first Peace Corps volunteers took the oath we all do when we swear in for service. It was a while ago, but I still remember my swearing in ceremony. Our Ambassador to Mongolia had to do the swearing, I guess the White House lawn was being watered.

At the end of our oath which btw is pretty much identical to the oath a President takes when he swears in, the part “So help me God” we were told that if we had an objection to such a statement (say perhaps you’re a Jehovah Witness or the like) we were allowed to not say it. Much like we were allowed to “solemnly affirm” instead of “solemnly swear” I know I already mentioned it, but I still enjoy reminiscing about the snort from my neighboring friend Matthew when I replaced that last bit with the phrase “…may the Force be with us.” Hey don’t get too mad, it was either that or “…so say we all.”

Most of us agree that last one is the “birthday” of the Peace Corps. We have all been asked to do a little something with that in our communities to try to get them to further understand the depth and degree to which the Peace Corps works. Today while I was out running…I had an idea. I get a lot of those while running. I begin to feel as though my running has begun to become a meditation of sorts. Often while running I lose huge chunks of time. I had made turns and decisions about where to go during my run that I had no idea that I had made. Its during these runs that great ideas enter my mind, and I use my running time to toy with them.

I had a ridiculous, montage parody idea. One similar in style to “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” but Peace Corps in mind. I am still working out a lot of specifics, and I don’t want to say what it is I am thinking of until I actually present it, but if I pull this off…well we never got the documentary off the ground but if I get this to work I think I will be quite happy.

March 1st 2011. Peace Corps will be turning 50 years old, go ahead and mark that down everyone.

February 18, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Unseasonably warm these days. Don’t even need a fire really anymore. Granted, I like it cold but still, last year around this time I couldn’t physically go outside and nowadays at midday sun the snow on the ground thaws a little! Today this morning when I rolled out of bed and started to put on socks I realized that it was so not cold…I don’t need to be wearing wool socks anymore. I went over to the cubbard and dug out my old run of the mill socks and put them on. Oh so much more comfortable (or maybe just clean…who knows) and off to school I went, this will keep my feet from sweating so much. Gonna like that.

February 20, 2011. The bus between UB and Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Ive been going to UB a lot more of late than usual. It may be that as my Peace Corps service comes to a close there is more both to be done and also to do when in UB, but in all honesty im not ever going for anything but a practical reason. My Uncle and my mom both had packages waiting for me at the office, and I didn’t want to have to deal with that on my birthday weekend, so I just came in for a Saturday/Sunday layover. Besides, there is no internet at my town this weekend…

So I am bouncing along back to my town, with two packages full of goodies, one of which hopefully has a new book for me to read. I went outside the realm of Star Wars and got one Fantasy based in nature this time. Looking forward to that. I bought all the provisions I need for a good birthday. Olive oil, cheese, lemon juice (to flavor my hummus) two bottles of good white wine, corn flakes…and….a 20 dollar bottle of Jack Daniels. Seriously that costs a lot more in America right? How does that work? How does liquour shipped in from the states cost less here? Honestly though the only people coming to my birthday party are my counterparts so I imagine I will keep my bottle of Jack to myself and drink it at a more convenient time.

Last night I got myself quite happy at American Burgers and Fries. I love that place. Some of the cosmo PCV’s living in UB dropped in and I told them they were welcome to meet me next Friday for the “shindig” I am throwing for myself. In essence it would mean ill buy the first round of anyone who feels like showing up…or ill just drink myself silly as I have done many a night. Ever since we buried my Grandmother on my birthday at 23 ive not really ever made a big deal about these birthdays anyway. So onwards we drive…the road goes ever on and on…out from the door where it began, a path ahead the road does go…

February 21, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

So, I opened a package. One sent from each side of my family. The one that my Uncle administered was pretty original. Lots of varying kinds of trail mixes and the like. Only had a little but already very tasty. There was one thing though. My uncle has snuck me a few bottles of hard liquor and the like. Very clever….but he sent NOTHING but vodka! No Jack Daniels, no Captain Morgan…..VODKA!!! Quite a good chuckle I got from that, and despite my aversion to the stuff I am sure I can put them to use on my birthday party on Thursday. Turning 30…heh.

Its really wonderful outside now. Cold but not daunting, and the wind is not there anymore. It means that I can stand outside without a hat on, and just sorta take it all in. Even in the winter (maybe even more) Mongolia is georgous, but too often the wind and cold deter you from seeing it. Today….absolutely stunning.

February 22, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Globus Hystericus. Also known as “A lump in your throat.” It’s a feeling I haven’t encountered in over two years. I am 99.9% certain this has no actual illment behind it. Its my mind giving me a physical condition to worry over. I had it when working on my Masters and applying to Peace Corps in the Spring of 2009. Now I find myself with the same annoying feeling.

Doesn’t hurt, clear mucus, nothing else is wrong with me and this stupid lump just wont go away. So I called Peace Corps medical for a favor. I go to UB on Friday for my birthday anyway, and ive asked them if they would be so kind to stick a scope down my throat and tell me there is nothing wrong down there. Personally I am certain this is just me not running my stress out so its manifesting but I might as well get a doctor to tell me im fine to maybe boost my psychological healing.

Common body work with me here!

February 23, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

I grow impatient. Its my lack of running I know, but I really do. Today I spent three hours helping my counterpart get her photos. “Her” photos is a relative word. She doesn’t have a camera, so she uses mine. Not for special instances, as in I give her my camera and I see it two months later when I say I need it for my birthday. Next her computer wont transfer the photos, so she wants to use my computer. So I help her do that, then she wants me to keep all her photos (were approaching 5 GB of photos) till I can put them on a flash drive that will transfer photos to her computer so she can send them to her friend. They are photos to be seen exclusively by a friend too btw…

I grow impatient because its on a morning like this where my sole use has been my computer is that I feel I am REALLY not satisfying the first goal of the peace corps. I am not working my way out of a job out here. I am a release valve. The guy with the technology that works and the knowhow to use it that they have no particular interest in learning so that they could do it when I am gone. Their solution.... the next volunteer will probably be able to do it too. I choose not to be angry about a lot, but today im angry about this as all hell. It’s a buildup thing, ive spent far too long used by my town in this fashion, and I don’t have the option of running my stress away. I know it comes with the territory and the job...and I usually can just let it go, but it has gotten to me today more than it usually does. This is why I have a damn lump in my throat too.

Lets talk about something else…

So according to Foxnews there is a television show called “Spartacus” which follows the dudes life as he fought in a Ludo (gladiator training center) and whatnot. The wife of the Ludo owner was none other than a 10 year removed Xena named Lucy Lawless. In this new show (on Starz) Ms. Former Xena is seen in various raunchy scenes of getting it on both with men but also scenes of other women too. Its funny, Xena was just a few years before my time but I remember the innuendo of the show enough to know that all the former Xena bars in San Francisco must have all been screaming jackpot to finally see here in a televised setting doing the thing they always expected she and Gabrielle had been doing off the camera. Based on the four episodes I ever saw of Xena (two from the second to last season and the 2 of the beginning of the last season) I was holding out for Aeries.

This is what happens when you join the Peace Corps. Even with the help of fast internet and Hulu you still miss out on stupid television, and when you live in a town without bars or cafes or movie theatres and your stuck indoors for over half a year you realize just why television was invented. Yes its oversaturated now, but folks before tv….life was boring. Now granted it still kind of is, but ill tell yea ive lived in both ways of life now, and my relativity screams for high def once again. Ive gone on enough walks into the hills to put “Planet Earth” to shame.

So today is ger cleaning and supplies buying. I have no idea how many teachers intend to come to my ger for my birthday tomorrow, and so ill either have a big party and drink a little, or have a small party and get drunk. Either way, I think this weekend is going to try to be the last time I drink until I make my way to Germany at the end of March. I could use a few weeks of detox I think.

11:50pm update. I just got done with a phone interview with Georgetown University. Unlike Cornell I do not believe that my Peace Corps (other side of the world phone convo) impressed them all that much. Not that it matters, none of these schools are going to hire me without being able to see me (which they will not until the end of June and by then they have all hired) So as I wait for a few minutes to kill I poured myself a beer (so much for detox until the festivities are done) and am counting down to 30….30….Nah, lets not make this a big deal. I feel young and healthy, I run marathons, I still love sex and I still watch cartoons…. I can be 30 if all of those things remain….29…. Well my 20’s…I didn’t start out all that well but that was the strongest finish I could ever have. Go me.

….now im 30…

…::belch:::…

February 24, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I saw on the news the events that are unfolding in Tunisia. I tell you, its funny what actually brings a country and its ruler down is it not? Those people have put up with that guy for decades! In the end their country begins an uprising that looks like it may actually throw the guy out…because their neighbor did it. Seriously did I miss some recent political misstep of Tunisia that started off their own insurrection…or really yea was it just the success of the Egyptian revolt?

So I am 30. Go me…

No philosophy, I promise. I know sometimes I write in this blog like I know what I am talking about. I wont even deny myself the idea that on VERY rare occasions I feel like I am genuinely on to something, but all in all…no. I just find comfort in occasionally writing things out that give me some peace of mind.

Lets not make this bigger than it is. My brother and sister were the first to send me regards on facebook. Very kind of them, we may have the Waspy interaction among adult siblings down pat, but we do truly all love each other that’s for damn sure. I like it, it gives peace of mind without being unnecessarily clingy. At the moment I am just cleaning up my ger for the army of people who will be showing up to sing me happy birthday and eat the bruschetta I am making. Go Mongolian life go! I wonder how many are planning to show…

February 25, 2011. The road to Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Noone came to my birthday party. Oh dear, I am 12 years old all over again and for some crazy reason of both bad luck and being a horrible pain in the ass noone has been able to attend my birthday party. (hehe…hey mom. You’re the one who had to deal with me at that age. Do you remember what I was like!?! :::seriously people in my bus are asking me why I am laughing right now as I try to type this. That’s the great thing about if you change when you get older. Your good memories stay the same and your bad memories either fade away or become funny as hell:::) Undoubtedly everyones absence is due to something happening at Ondortolge that noone has bothered to tell me. My reaction when I was 11 years old was to go sit in my room alone and cry. This time at 30 I went and sat in my room alone and drank. See how much more mature I have become? Okay…now for the disclosure: I am not depressed about this. I find birthdays as little more than an excuse to drink more than I usually do, and that is a lot.

Funny thing though, yesterday in the afternoon before I thought my guests would arrive I went out for a run. I hadn’t been running since the week before, and the lump in my throat and the general all around discomfort I had been experiencing was gone. Like really gone. Adding further proof that my pain was psychological in nature and not something that actually was affecting me, but also that my life is so much better when I dedicate 1/24th of each day in the pursuit of running.

Until the age of 23, I never ran. I remember not always feeling all that good but considering it takes me merely a week of inactivity to truly feel lousy, I can only reminisce on how terrible I must have felt before.

Good news about noone coming to your birthday btw? You get to drink all the wine your kick ass Aunt sent you! Yes I drank 2 liters of wine in about three or four hours. Ive gotten drunker before, but its been a long time before I got to drink something so ambrosic that I wanted to kneel before gods that I don’t believe in and offer my blood in exchange for more of what was in my cup. What can I say, even while not as drunk as I have ever been I still got pretty damn drunk! So now I am en route to a doctors appointment and then to return to American Burgers and Fries to drink to my 30th in a much more roudy crowd, a crowd of fellow Peace Corps Volunteers. Go kick ass life…GO!!!!

February 27, 2011. The bus heading back to Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Now Peace Corps Volunteers and the UB restaurant American Burgers and Fries….now THEY know how to throw on a shindig! Got to UB and checked in to UB guesthouse, figuring as last week the place would be empty. How wrong I am. Not only lots of people, but exclusively PCVS! Now actually all of the PCV’s at the guesthouse were M21’s who decided to meet this weekend at the Peace Corps office to discuss the formation of summer camps, but it was also just a good excuse to hang out. Shamefully I know almost none of their names as I both rarely see any of them and I am not that good at names to begin with. Im also at the stage where its too embarrassing for me not to know their names so I just pretend to not be a constant name “throwerouter” Wasent there an episode of Seinfeld about all this?

First things first, I needed to get checked out by medical about the lump in my throat. Prognosis: It’s a stress lump. They looked in my mouth, felt for actual lumps in my throat and all around anomalies and found none. No other symptoms or physical pain past the discomfort of the sensation itself and therefore any x-ray or the like was unnecessary….in essence I just need to work on my stress. You may be surprised to find me stressed as I have very little these days to stress over, but I have always been prone to stress bouts and my inability to run has augmented me in such a state.

So pretty much as soon as I can start running again I will be fine. Not as easy to do as it sounds though… This week the weather has brought new batches of snow to the area, and so now we find ourselves with even icier roads. The weather is also going to be cloudy for the next 10 or so days. VERY uncommon in Mongolia. I had no real other chores in UB this week, so I just sat at a café an ate. Ive been eating and drinking a little too well of late. While at medical they weighed me but I still had gained eight pounds from last summer. I could feel it too. Jeans still fit, and I still feel semi agile but yea there is some weight on me I didn’t have four (or even 2) months ago. Well I could worry about eating a little less when I got back to my site and didn’t return to UB for a month, and that evening American Burgers and Fries were cooking me up a massive calzone for all the Peace Corps volunteers who were either there for the birthday bash or were just there and joined the masses.

That part was fun, but the M20 UB ladies who were my guide for the evening took me two blocks up to an art gallery I did not know existed. It was….AWESOME. It was chock full of ex-pats! Hot ex-pats too! Some of them were playing guitar and we all just mingled and played around a little. I chatted up two VERY hot German women, who seemed to think me turning 30 was the hottest thing since the lava lamp. A fellow PCV was even nice enough to buy me a round of tequila. Now I may not favor my liquor but that shot of tequila was something else! When you drink vodka the sensation you experience (provided its not rotgut) is one of a cleansing type sensation. With tequila, the sensation is blinding and shocking. It tasted good.

It was rounding 1am at the art gallery/guitar thingy and I thought everyone was going to take off…and then something else was proposed by the UB ladies. We were going to a nightclub. Now then, I famously hate nightclubs. I don’t dance well, I hate screaming loud techno music and I especially hate expensive beers. But you know, I was drunk enough but still with my wits, I was so damn flattered that I kept being taken to all these places that I had not been to before, and most of all they assured me that a Philippine cover band played at the place too. The last one sealed the deal. It was a nightclub called strings….never had heard of it before, and like all nightclubs its built the exact same way. Dance floor, comphy seats for VIP’rs and a bar with expensive beer. We checked in our coats and got the one and only beer for that spot. I was drunk enough at that point anyway.

When we first got there the band was on a break, and head splitting techno music of some kind was being played. I sat at a table while the others danced during this and sorta went into a sense of serenity about my 30th birthday right then. I realized now that I am 30 I never ever again have to go to one of these insane and loud nightclubs ever again. Despite the noise I was having fun, and then when the band showed up and started playing the noise at least took on the form of music. It was a cover band, and was very presentable. We white folks were there in enough numbers to form our own dance circle which ambitious Mongolian men and women would join and we just wobbled around to Bon Jovi and Metallica and more. That might have been the highlight point too. When everything was just so damn perfect, and once again I felt like I was the king of the world.

We closed down the nightclub, and at 3:30am were in a semi-out of the way place in UB. We piled into a cab. 5 of us in a space built to hold 3. Some were literally piled atop one another. Hehe…that was an amusing and drunken ride back to the state department store. At that point we all had to walk back to our respective guesthouses. So there I was…30…alcohol…alone…at night. Additionally the side gates to our guesthouse courtyard close after midnight and given both the ice and my state of intoxication I did not trust myself to climb the iron fence (see? Even intoxicated I usually have my wits about me) so instead I went to the driving gate which meant walking down a pitch black alleyway to reach it. As I did so and a few rather burly looking Mongolians were chain smoking to a side of the alley all I could think was “wow…now would be a REALLY good time for someone to try and rob me!” But the Sky Father was watching over me, and through sheer blind dumb luck I got back to the guesthouse and into my room with nothing taken or stolen. I was asleep at 4am…and awake and sober at 8:30am….i was spared a hangover for a birthday present I suppose. Saturday was chatting with the M21’s about their summer plans and a movie night at the guesthouse with some of the 21’s. A lite Saturday so to speak. Appropriate.

I woke up today and its time to head back to UB. I didn’t get the front seat that I like which sucks because I was the first on the scene….but you cant have it all…right? Time to post this blog I suppose. I forgot to take a lot of pictures but ill have a few in a little bit. February is about to end. That’s sorta seen as the end of Mongolian winter. Now we move on to the chilly and windy days of spring. Not a lot of days left of Peace Corps service….Time moves right along.

My newest culinary invention. Bruschetta! Topped with a horrific bottle of wine and an episode of the cult favorite show "John Doe" from 10 years ago.

My whole teaching staff went to a place in UB called "Mongolian BBQ" which is a food chain of all you can eat buffet places. Quite good, and naturally i was continuously at the salad bar. The teachers all laughed at me non stop

Ah, the great building of the centerpiece cake. I was glad i got to see this as i had not last year.

For me Thanksgiving is always going to bring me flashbacks of this holiday in Mongolia. Its lacking coleslaw though...and wine...and Virginia dip...and i dont eat meat in America...okay fine its not the same, but its a pretty food spread all the same!

I love how dark this is while we drink white cups of airag. Thats me and Levi. We were the old farts of the Erdene training group (both almost 30!) That dude rocks.

There definitely is a family resemblance.

Thats got to be one of the best family photos ever taken. By the by, thats the widest my mother has ever smiled!

Shagai, our old Mongolian teacher. I am glad she got to hear me now...let her know it finally did all click

Go Erdene Go...Home Sweet Home

It's the greatest show ever. Its like Broadway off it's meds. It is never the same show twice, and allows for mild amounts of heckling. Oh, and it only cost between 11 and 16 dollars to see each month. Even if i dont live in New York i am going to find a way to go see them again. These are just two i pulled off youtube not counting the one i recorded and put on there.

January 28, 2011. UB Guesthouse, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “You see we don’t have a holiday called Tsaagen Tsar in America. We have Thanksgiving. This is where we clean up our houses and put on our best clothes so we can pretend to the people and family visiting us that this is what we are like all the time and they show up and they are all nicely dressed as if they wore clothes like that all the time too and we have happy-go-lucky conversations about family matters and then spend the whole time eating and drinking wonderful foods that we would not get to have at any other time and then the men pass out watching sport events on tv while the women all go shopping….so having just said that basically we have your holiday but it happens in November.” –I really did say this. Honestly I did.

Credit Card protection methods are racist! The idea of where something is purchased is how the cards decide if they will accept payment or not. Today I was trying to buy my plane ticket to Germany/Europe. It was all going along fine, and suddenly when I try to pay for it by credit card it denied payment. Did it again, didn’t work…

Obviously I was a little stumped. Got my mom on the phone on skype to do something rather funny. With her at the computer in Northern Virginia and me at a café in Ulaanbaatar, she went to the same website and punched in my ticket information along with my passport number and credit card. It went through. They seem to feel more confident it is a legal purchase when it comes from Northern Virginia instead of Mongolia. But you have no idea how small you are until you realize that you are on a computer in Mongolia talking to your mother on the other side of the world as she uses her computer to buy a plane ticket using your credit card and passport information that you relay to her so you can fly to a beer festival in Germany. Seriously what the hell did we do ten years ago??? I was 19 for crying out loud.

Morale of the story? I got my plane ticket. A flight from UB to Munich and back cost me 850 bucks. I am rather impressed how cheap that is. Gives me a nice big safety blanket for living comfortably the rest of my time here.

January 30, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Was spending a lot of time unnecessarily drinking, so I decided to come back to my town a day early. I am glad I did. I brought with me some cheeses better suited for pizza making along with some honest to Gods true granny smith apples. I love these apples, they type that you feel like you could crack your teeth on when you eat. Outfreakingstanding. Naturally it cost enough, but with February money arriving early I had more than enough money to draw on.

I got to sit in the front seat on my way back from UB too. I wish I had brought my camera. This is a beautiful country, in many different ways too. Some of its beauty comes in lanscape, sometimes in people, culture, music, hell sometimes an upturned van on the side of the road with the countryside in the backdrop can even look nice. Today when driving back it was windless, not even sub-zero outside, and not a single cloud in the sky. The way the sun shone on the lightly snowed ground in every direction, the degree of serenity and eternity I felt and experienced at the time. It amazed me to my very core. It was like I wanted to believe in a religion just so there was someone I could thank for such a site at the time. As I was sitting and able to see the driver something interesting could be seen. This driver guy…first off he rocks. I hear horror stories from other PCV’s about drivers who literally swig from vodka bottles as they tear down the road. My dudes a real straight shooter. A heavy drinker but always when work is done. Anyways the way I saw him scan the road. This back and forth day in day out job of his in which he must know every bump in the road by now. Even he, he wasent jaw dropped like I was but it was obvious that even he thought that this was a sight to behold.

…or maybe someone put LSD in the Tsuivan I bought from the woman at the black market. No clue.

I return to UB on Tuesday. Tsaagen Tsar approaches!

January 31, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

There is something screwy going on with one of my teeth. I have had this feeling before when I ate large quantities of meat but I don’t like it all the same. I may like my candy and my soda, but I could adopt a sugar free life and I would still have teeth problems. They are not the strongest part of my body. Fair enough I guess, just requires me to have good dental…or be a Peace Corps volunteer. Ill wait it out till at least the end of Tsaagen Tsar, see what it feels like then.

The schools wireless internet is also offline. Its all plugged in right but is not assigning IP. The servers not at the school, so I imagine its been shut down at the govt center. Nothing for it, and with an Ethernet cord I can still use internet in town. Gotta go pick one of those up while shopping tomorrow.

I have also tonight bought and have been drinking the worst and most expensive bottle of uh…oh sure lets call it “wine” my town has….its a day of a lot of screwy things!

At least one thing still works though. I got my running shoes on and got a good run in. That was a good thing to do. With the upcoming holiday I am gonna get good and bloated on alcohol and it will be a little while before I can exercise again. Even days of broken things feel good after a long run.

February 1, 2011. Nayra’s Café, Mongolia

Bus tickets…yea….well nothing for it. I came to UB a day early believing that since this is the eve of the biggest holiday in all of Mongolia people would be buying bus tickets out of UB like mad to go see their family members (like me) in the outer soums.

I imagine if I live here my whole life ill learn about….half the quirks I need to be as sharp as my fellow Mongolian. People aren’t trying to travel OUT of town, people are fighting to GET to their relatives who live in UB instead. Makes sense now that I think about it, but it means when I went to the bus station today and tried to buy a ticket for tomorrow I got a good laugh from the teller. She by the way looked shockingly like the woman who I had the runabout with the world “Dadal” last summer. Maybe that’s why she was laughing at me. Or it could have been that I was wearing my winter dell.

Yep. Broke it out for its second one time use of making me look quite high brow for Tsaagen Tsar. Its thick as anything and hot as hell once you get in a building, but when walking around Mongolia in the winter there is nothing more comfortable out there, bar none!

Well, a day early, and nothing to do until 10:30am tomorrow. I put my stuff down at UB Guesthouse again and just walked coatless to the nearby café to sit down and update a blog and eat a good sandwich. Being early does have its advantages I suppose. Pick up some fruits and the like as gifts for the holiday, then park it at a bar for some beer drinking. Ive had worse Tuesdays.

Postscript: Hey, someone tried to rob me and my friend! I went over to the state department to buy some fruit for the wonderful M21 named Allison who lives in Erdene at the moment. It was your typical method of two guys push in at a doorway while one grabs your stuff from behind. We have been trained in such methods and Cameron (the PCV who they tried to do this to) shook them off very effectively. They obviously didn’t try to rob me because as I was wearing a dell my pockets are behind layers and layers.

I tell you they were angry as hell it didn’t work either. They did seem quite professional, and it was only because we really knew what we were doing that we didn’t get robbed. Actually as I got a little down the road they still stood at the doorway getting ready to get back in position and I did something…risky. I …hehe….i waved at them. They saw me do it too. One of them nudged their friend who was not paying attention to see me wave as well. I let them know just how much I knew those asses were common thieves…and that they not only had failed…but I was going to mock them for it! Now yes, I was on the main road of UB and they wouldn’t want trouble with the police but there was no way of being certain my act of mockery would have gotten them hot headed enough to just run over and start beating the crap out of me…they didn’t, and I think in that ONE instance it was totally worth it.

Worse still was that later that night a thief was successful. Levi, one of the guys I trained with was also going to Erdene for Tsaagen Tsar and was bring his friend with her. A VSO volunteer from Portugal. A very sweet woman who owns a blackberry phone. Some jerk came to the restaurant we were at and was pretending to beg for food. She had placed her phone down on the table and then the dude had thrown the menu down atop of it pretending to ask us to buy him a meal. He slid the phone from behind the table right off and then took straight off. Jerk… It goes to show you it really only takes that one terrible time for them to rob you blind here.

February 8, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Now that…was one hell of a wild ride” –If I don’t get to die Kamikaze style I want those to be my final words…For the record, if I do get to go down in a blaze of glory like say firing proton torpedoes at a death star I want my last words to be “SAY CHEESE!!!!”

Well…a week without blog entries. In all fairness this has been one hell of a wild ride this week so it goes without saying my lacking in blog materials is something to be expected, but now its time to bring everything up to speed.

So I woke up February 2nd and checked out of the guesthouse. Putting on my winter dell is a little more labor some than I thought it would be. When its -50 and your stationary it will keep you nice and toasty, but if its only -20 and your moving around a lot, well that’s when you start to sweat. Sweat is not a good thing to have happen when its cold out. Eventually the sweat runs cold and your body now has to heat itself more in the process.

Also, I am walking through UB in a dell and its not Tsaagen Tsar till tomorrow. Tall white guy in a winter dell. I was the king of the eye traffic! Lotta looks and points. I mean, as a tall white guy in Mongolia that already happens, but now it wasn’t looking at me like that is cool. Now I was wearing something indicating that I was not a tourist. This…puzzled people. Got on the bus and made my way to the east bus station. Boy howdy. Compared to the nightmarish Dragon Center bus station that services the west of Mongolia this one handling the East…oh gods its infinitely better. Line….THERE WAS A LINE!!!! Four people sequentially standing behind one another patiently waiting for ticket purchases. I was afraid to move or breath for fear of disrupting this utopia. I stood behind them and the line moved briskly. No 25 ticket orders by one person or anything like that. The ticket cashier was alert and courteous. When I got up and said “Be neg billet tegeed autobus Erdene soum auoooarraee.” (I would like to buy one ticket on the next bus to the town of Erdene please) The teller didn’t even break stride. They had just understood every word I just said. Seriously I was in some alternate universe where Mongolians stand in line and understand my Mongolian speaking in the capital no less!

Ten minutes later my bus left ten minutes early. Buses are a lot different than the meekers I usually drive. They actually have seat seats that you alone get to ride in. This bus was also heated, though I was still warm enough I could have done without that. The drive to Erdene went on without incident, and the person I was sitting next to was neither fat nor drunk. WTH????

We pull up to Erdene and I file out. Erdene…looked just like I left it in July. Actually it didn’t even have all that much snow on the ground either. It was nice to see the big mountain again which my town has in the background. This country is stuffed full of mountains just like it, but dammit if I did not think this one was the best.

Some new stores, some stores had closed down. They had set up road indicators up the dirt areas and the basketball court had a coat of cement the 21’s had made over the summer, but all in all Erdene was just like I had left it.

I walked up the dirt road towards Allison’s ger, located in the yard of my old language instructor Shagai. Shagai’s yard was a bright red picket fence, and she had built a garage at her place too. Very cool looking indeed. If this town had a wealthy district Shagai definitely lives there. Allisons ger was a little bigger than mine, and her yard as always is defended by a dog. Allisons dog though….wolf….i mean it that was a black wolf. Chained and with good reason, that thing looked like it could take down a lion.

Allison however, is very very cool. Her gers size allows her a slightly different setup than mine. She has a very nice and large bed that puts mine to shame, and her refrigerator is also a freezer. She’s got quite the setup! Her family (as she is a woman….sexism!) also does her water errands and prepares a lot of her wood (though she chops some too) Lucky! So like all volunteers we met and just chatted for pretty much two hours straight. She rocks, and sounds like she’s in the same situation I was around 8 or so months into service. Doing okay language wise, getting the routine down and working hard even when hardly working. Good for her. I thanked her for her hospitality and gave a batch of granny smith apples/real oranges and even a lemon. It seemed to be a good gift.

We were later met by two additional M21’s named Boelyn and Ellie who had trained at Erdene last summer. All perfectly nice ladies I was glad to have met. Yet, after hours of chatter I got a txt from my sister telling me to head over by around 7pm to help with the preparations. No idea what that meant as last year when in Ondortolge no one really was here to involve me that much. Yet before I even left the yard I got to bump back into Shagai who had returned to her house at last. Mongolians don’t really hug, even old friends they haven’t seen in a while. So instead I sorta just stood in front of her with my arms out jumping up and down very lightly acting like a ten year old. She found it hilarious. She had just given birth to her 2nd son a few months back, and was way skinnier than I last saw her.

So after that intro I walked back over to my moms house on the edge of town. I always liked that walk when I was training in the summer. It was a long quiet walk that let me either clear my head or reminisce. The weather was mild, the green roof of my mothers house was in sight, and as I walked into the yard….a lot had changed, and a lot had stayed the same. A brand new white car was parked in the yard. Seriously just sitting there. I thought at first okay maybe it was a friend dropping by or something but as I looked around the yard and saw another change that was related to the car. Just didn’t know it yet.

The sheep and the goats were all gone. Yup…the only thing in the pen was the three cows and two very pregnant goats and sheep. My family had close to 100 animals last year. Its too late for them to be grazing…so where were they? This was explained to me later but I think ill put it in here. So my brother graduated from vocational school and got a job as sorta a mobile engineer here and around UB. It requires him to drive so a car would be of vital importance. Additionally, it meant he is seldom at home anymore. My sister works as a teacher and as my Mongolian mother is pressing 60, the handling of her livestock pretty much had fallen only on her. I made this deduction myself but I believe I am right. My mother, who loves her lifestyle could not continue to keep doing as she had as sole herder/animal caretaker for the family. Selling the animals gave them the necessary funds to pay for a car which would greatly increase my brothers degree and pay of work and also. The cows were kept so my mother could continue to gather milk from them. It was not a bad change, just something I never really saw coming.

So that’s what was different. Everything else? The rail car/shed, the outhouse, the homicidal guard dog, the garden, yup…they were just as I had left em. I went into the house to see my family hard at work cleaning the house from top to bottom. I really do have the Mongolian family doppelganger. Everything needed to be nice an clean prior to the new year. Oh why not…I got to work scrubbing the floor. My mom, brother and sister were all curious about my life and I relayed all relevant data. My sister had grown out her previous swim team haircut but I still had longer hair than her. My brother as always continued to remain very quiet and only initiated conversation when it was absolutely necessary. Good gods it my doppelganger family! After the cleaning was done I got to see something happen that I hadn’t before….we made the cake! VERY cool. Every family makes a cake out of flat breads and “white foods” of a sort. I got to take lots of pictures during this process as my family got the food ready and it really was interesting to see it happen. A base layer, the flat breads, orum on top, butter, goober like chocolate balls on the top. More butter and sugar cubes. We made a kick ass cake. Then they arranged the sheep meat, the salads (my family had cabbage salad unlike the potato salad so popular at Bagakhangai) and a giant airag bowl. Airag as you probably recall is the fermentation of horse milk and has roughly the equivalent alcohol content of beer. Its hard to come by, especially in the winter, and my family alone had it in town. Really a good treat. So one by one all the platters of food were set up and when all was ready you would really not be able to tell the difference from American Thanksgiving except for the types of foods prepared. My family all put on nice clothes and we sat and ate the “Pre-Tsaagen Tsar” Feast. This was completely unknown to me as last year I had no such guidance in these matters, I am very glad I came this year. So we ate a lot, good stuff too. They had all seemed to forget that I am willing to eat fat. I recalled to them when I nearly choked on the stuff a few years ago and they all double over in laughter. Didn’t find it quite that funny but hey…whatever works. We drank all the typical drinks. Milk tea…(ah..my moms is the best) sodas, airag, and of course vodka. I really wanted to go lite on vodka this year, so I made a deal with my mom that I would drink the required three shots of vodka on the day I came with all the other PCV’s. The horse airag though was excellent, and of course…buuz came out. Ah buuz, its more a winter than a summer food, but is by far Mongolians favorite meal except for maybe meat right off the bone. Whats not to like right? Its meat with the tiniest layer of flour to contain it as its steamed….Nothing not to like.

So I ate my fill and my family was kind enough to give me a life back to Allisons ger. We all went to Shagai’s house and did some more reminiscing. I like Shagai. She’s sorta your “have it all” Mongolian life type setups. Shes married, children, both her and her husband work good jobs, plenty of money, no alcohol problems, a nice house and nothing but a bright future ahead. The Mongolian Dream I suppose. She sounds very happy, and so am I for her.

As we later that night adjourned to the ger for rest I encountered something I hadn’t thought of. I was in a small round tent with three women, and we needed to change clothes. We did each other the courtesy of looking at something important on a wall as one gender and then the other changed. It did remind me that I do indeed live alone though usually. Was glad not to be seen though. Winter life is making me fat. This binge eating didn’t help either!

So I got out the subzero sleeping bag and took up residence on the floor. It was the second time I had ever used the sleeping bag, both times in this town and around this time! That’s funny. Allisons ger is also sort of built on a slant so for the entire night my body wanted to roll to the corner. But still, not all that hard to sleep. Boy I hope I didn’t snore too loudly. They didn’t complain but then again I don’t know if that means that I didn’t.

So the next morning we all had to…ugh…get up early. I hate getting up early, especially after a night of heavy eating from before. This was where we would have our first “Amar Bahn UU?” with the family to christen the new year. Each of us went straight to our host families alone and greeted one another. You basically get the closest human contact to a Mongolian without having sex with them during this time too. You ask each other basically if they are having a good new year and you “kiss” by sniffing the side of each others cheeks. If your younger, you support the persons hands in the “hug” portion of this too. Its funny, this is a country where we stack ourselves till were practically humping someone when riding a car, and yet we don’t actually hug all that much in this country…theres some psychology behind that I just know it!

After that I gave gifts to each member of my family. I gave my mom and sister money and some oranges and apples. For my brother, a pack of cigarettes. Not the crummy one he smokes either. The actual cigarettes that cost more than a dollar a pack to buy! Got my first sounds of grammar from my brother as he said thank you for the gift. Go me! We then sat down…and ate again. Pretty much the exact same thing, but they did spare me from having to drink that much. As it was 9 in the morning I was thankful.

After another feast my family told me that they would take me to Allisons hosfamily so I could meet up with the other PCV ladies and “we could start doing our rounds” Another quick car ride and then we reached the house near the school. The house I was taken into was stuffed full of Mongolians I didn’t recognize, and Allison was off collecting the other ladies. So basically I sat there and did the routine of greeting everyone and then drinking all the nice drinks and eating the foods. This family also had what is known as “Mongolian Vodka” it’s a clear drink about 10% alcohol content and tastes like slightly odd water. I had actually seen how this stuff is created last summer when I had been on my Hovsgul Nuur trip. It’s a machine as old as the Pyramids themselves, probably older. It takes a liquid, boils off the non booze and leaves you with the greatest percentage of alcohol you can get without a more modern distiller type thingy.

Perfectly drinkable, and Mongolians consider it their most dangerous drink. The idea is that unlike actual vodka this stuff doesn’t hurt to drink, and unlike Airag this stuff is potent enough to get you drunk pretty quick. More so, it sneaks up on you as well…

Ten or so minutes later explaining who I was the three other ladies show up and we drink the many drinks and eat the many foods. Pretty much the first day of Tsaagen Tsar was us tearing through houses. We went to Aditya’s ger, the other PC language teacher and the gers of several other volunteers who were not present, it was also during this day that Levi and his friend made it to town. Our group of four just became six! The first day….that was more liquor than food, not by our choice either. I as a man am expected to drink more, and while some houses were considerate some demanded I drink more. Never got drunk, but as night fell I was certainly done with drinking. You know whats not served at Tsaagen Tsar? WATER!!!!!! And being an idiot I forgot all the stores would be closed so there was no water to be bought.

We awoke the morning of the second day….not with a mind splintering headache, but one of a person who had forgotten to drink water before going to bed. Bleh. I almost never get headaches, and a hangover to me usually feels all around cruddy and not head splitting. Bleh to too much vodka!

The second day had also brought a blanket of snow to the town. We made our way over the hill together to my mothers house, who was thrilled to see us all having returned from seeing distant relations in UB. We sat around and had a great morning feast. They like the horse airag and Levi agreed my moms tea is best. I got some great pictures of us all feasting too. I know its home field advantage and all that, but I do think my family had the best Tsaagen Tsar spread. Small, but hardy. That sort of thing.

We went to mostly PCV families houses the second day. By the second day there were some drunken men passed out near houses. I guess the booze and food caught up to some. Not for us though. Actually the second day was more foods than it was alcohol…and some did not settle that well. I knew the feeling, the feeling of food in my stomach that my body refuses to process. Not drunk at all, just one or twelve too many buuz that one was not agreeing with me. As night fell the second night I knew what needed to happen. I just needed to puke it up. Or at least that which had not digested and just sat in my stomach. I timed it well, and not even all that intoxicated at all I made my way to the outhouse and had one really really good vomit cession. It came out in the chunk stuff, I could really feel pieces of buuz passing by as it came out.

One good puke later and all felt fine again. I love my body! We all returned back to the ger at the end of the day thoroughly Tsaagen Tsard out. The following morning my brother would give me and Levi and her friend a lift to UB. Charged us a little bit for it too, but I get that gas doesn’t grow on trees. After a few decompression showers I sort of spent the afternoon convalescing from the nights of alcohol…with a Gem beer. Good Gods I love my body!

Sunday was a meeker ride back to town. I had to go to the annoyingly infamous Bars market…I hate that place, but Naarantuul was closed, and my meeker had to go somewhere. We got back to town and I saw that my ger looked in pretty good shape. It was so warm that the water in my ger had not even exploded my water barrel! Kick ass. Sunday night I get a text from Sarango that our boss Tsetsge was having a teacher Tsaagen Tsar that I would be attending….luckily the day of no eating and only beer drinking had sharpened my appetite again.

Last year I had made the mistake of sitting in a spare room with the men instead of joining the women teachers in the main room with the cake and everything. This year I was much smarter. I was ready to rock this year, and rock I did. We all sat together, and the tradition of passing many many bowls happened. We drank and drank, and then salads appeared and we ate and ate. One was even tofu salad. Go progressive Monoglians go! There were a LOT of bottles of vodka and though it was a long table there were three serving maidens who each had a “sector” They were merciless, and not just to me either. Really they would not let you give back anything but an empty cup.

One woman next to me committed what is probably the greatest party foul in all of Mongolia. She had been taking her shot of vodka and then looked like she was drinking a juice bottle for a chaser, when she was in fact spitting the alcohol into the bottle. The men next to her on the other side found out…and…wow…. They were so mean to her. The women too!!!! Good gods folks, she meant no offense. I really tried to have her side but she seemed too ashamed of herself. Come now people, its vodka, not the blood of the Sky Father!

When the buuz arrived I ate my three. I knew was the perfect amount of full at that and I was insistent, so when they realized that was a dead end they proceeded to force vodka on me. That I could do. I was having one of those days again. I don’t know how but some very rare days I have an insanely high tolerance to vodka. I am talking about 3/4ths a liter of 40% stuff and still not drunk! Other times it kicks my ass after four shots. This night was the former. I didn’t get loud, or obnoxious, my Mongolian was still understandable and I really did just continue on as though it were a perfectly fun party.

Then it was time to sing. Singing at a Mongolian party is both mandatory and unavoidable. They give you some horse airag in one hand and a shot of vodka in the other and the idea is your supposed to earn your hosts hospitality by entertaining them with a song. I was about halfway through the line of people to sing when they handed it to me. I rose, looking and feeling very clear headed and sharp. So I made a bold move, and in Monoglian I made the following speech to everyone:

“Thank you host for having me to your home for Tsaagen Tsar. Almost two years ago I came from America and I moved to Bagakhangai. In that time we have all been able to work together at the school to continue to help improve in the teaching. I am happy I have been able to work with you and next year, perhaps both schools will have a new Peace Corps volunteer and you can all laugh at them for once again not knowing how to speak English.”

Mongolians don’t laugh all that much, the blatant display of emotions thingy… but somehow maybe its how I said it but they all really laughed at that…I sorta froze that moment, me with a shot of vodka and a cup of airag standing before people I had worked with for nearly 2 years and having them all agree and laugh with me. There are moments in life where you don’t take an actual picture, but you must truly burn them into your memory…because at that exact moment, life was more than good. Life was worth…anything really ….ah hell…happiness may be relative but id live a thousand years in misery if it meant I got to have one more experience like that again.

…but now I had to sing. I don’t know the title of the song I sang, but its one of the only ones I know. Not exactly Mongolias national anthem but something similar. A lot about pride and greatness. Everyone sang along, and I think it really helped to hide my own signing (see “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” for reference) and at the end they actually applauded me. I took the whole shot and downed the entire cup of airag. I felt like the king of the world.

We did the rest of the teachers songs, and a little after that it was time to go. We were given a “parting shot” which mine was about three times larger than everyone elses. I think the teachers were all aware that I was acting way too calm and collected for the amount of alcohol they had given me and as usual were trying to figure out what it was that would finally get me euphoric or at the very least don the drunken grin. I drank the last shot and they let me out like everyone else. It was when I finally left that the wave of drunkness finally got to me. Luckily I stumbled safely back to my ger and downed a liter and a half of water before passing out. Yesterday I woke up still drunk from the night before. One of those where you don’t feel bad but rather really unnaturally light and euphoric…ie: the rare “still drunk from the night before” teaching in that state is harder than you think!

Finally today and a full 24 hours removed from alcohol I am writing up the crazy ordeal of everything. I love this country, I love this town, I love this job, and I love this life.

GO MONGOLIA GO!!!!!!

February 9, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Life slowly returns to normal. Its been 2 days sober now. I needed it. I can feel myself slowly getting back to full strength and regaining all my wits. Dangit…used to only take one day when on a bender. 30 approaches I guess. Still between a size 30-32 though, even after gaining over ten or so pounds probably over the new year. Go body go!

Tomorrow I move the pictures to my computer. May actually cut this month in two blog wise and post this one because later in the month I have the birthday segment of my blog as well. Sounds about right. Nothing left to do but to go back to work. We are no longer having -40/50 nights though. At its worst at night it only hovers around -30, meaning that I JUST….barely need a fire before I go to bed at night. During the day? Heck I sit around without even socks on!

A very very mild winter here in Mongolia. Suiting, given the conditions of last year. Now that we are in post-Tsaagen Tsar mode a great deal has been happening in the office of my school. I eventually need to take a picture and post this office to demonstrate the size of it in relativity to what I am complaining about. Our school is only 4 classrooms, and so much of the time teachers do not have class as we have classes going on from 8am to 630pm to accommodate all subjects and classes. Next year we have a new school built and I am sure the M22 will be all thrilled about it, but for now it means that a lot of the time the teachers are sitting around with much ado about nothing.

I, doing my darned to intergrate and not spend my time locked away in my ger watching repeats of Psych and Firefly instead try to remain at the office for the majority of the day and contribute where possible and at least to sit and read or post something on facebook. It’s a room built for about 5 people, and now that tsaagen tsar is over people have excess buuz and bring them to school. Teachers, otherwise uninterested in sitting in an office with nothing to do often retire to their apartments to relax or watch tv. When food is present though, they converge. Imagine me in a student dormitory, now add this in. 20 loud, hungry, chatty, sometimes a little intoxicated, teachers running around bumping into one another and creating a huge ruckus as they all try to eat incessantly. I feel like my head is going to explode when they do that! It only usually lasts as long as the food…around an hour today…but G.M. Chrysler people. Calm the hell down and stop shuffling around especially behind me randomly slapping me on the back!

January 10, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Oh dear, I am bored. Not bad though, not like last month bored. This bored is more like on this particular day I have four hours until I get to teach again and as for right now I don’t feel like watching things on youtube for the 2,000,000,000th time. So, I figure ill cut my blog in half this month. One for the the Tsaagen Tsar section of February and one for the birthday section at the end of the month. I can also then post some pictures and videos relevant (and irrelevant!) to the blog as well. Fun fun…

December 29, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “The only real voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscape, but in having new eyes.” –Proust

Today while walking to school I noticed something. This keeps happening where ill pass the same place a thousand times and each time things seem slightly different than before. This time though Santa was looking at me. Yup. For the past two weeks a massive pile of snow has been outside the government office. This was strange as though it is incredibly cold around here we have had very little snow this year. Not complaining, it just becomes a sheet of ice and we have to go dig out the road when it gets bad. So I was not sure WHY there was so much snow/ice there but I just let it runs its course. Now I know what they have done. They started a snow/ice sculpture. With sub-zero temps continuing until March or even April they have carved out two 10 foot tall ice sculptures of Santa and Ms. Claus to stand guard at the entrance of our govt. building. How clever.

My mother would likely remark how tacky they look, and yes they are, but thanks to my childish disposition im rather for tacky!

Today it was still over negative 20 outside today. That’s subzero Fahrenheit but there was a great twist to the weather…no wind! Right after classes I threw on my running shoes and made my way to the rail tracks. I had some ger chores that I probably should have done like get some water but a windless day in winter is just far too rare. The run was exhilarating. I had a lot of built up energy and I ran a little faster than I usually do. I loved how without the wind the cold did little more than give my body that perfect go between of cooking in my clothes and also feeling cool on the outside. I got my body to sweat and though it will mean even after a water rinse I will smell a bit to get your body to sweat at least feels like the healthiest thing you can do it. I can feel the leftover garbage from all my holiday vices pouring out of me.

Best of all, running relieves stress in myself and lets me sleep. Like really sleep. Tonight will be the most wonderful dreamless unconsciousness I will have encountered in weeks. I gotta try and run like this at least twice a week if I hope to like last winter maintain my running form for summer marathons. You know, when January rolls around I should probably look up marathons to do back stateside. Probably try and run the NY marathon even if I am not living there.

December 30, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well mark the day. This is when I finally have made a decision to put my foot down and pull the plug on my eagle hunt in the west. It was going to be one of the four points I traveled to and did something one of a kind, but after getting monetary information on it it just reached a tipping point.

The only people who would take me out on a trip into the eagle hunting region in the far west wanted $2,250 for seven days, that included one day just flying to Olgii, One day flying back too. Meaning after you start horse trekking to the region for hunting id be there for 3 days. I spent 25 days at Khovsgul Nuur on horseback for under $500. This was just not acceptable. $2,250 will buy a PS3 to replace the one my brother somehow worked to death as well as buy every game that has come out since I joined Peace Corps with enough money to buy one of those new 3d TV’s as well. I cant logically fork out that much money for so short a period of gratification.

So, with the hunts plug pulled its time to think about China. That will be last week of March, first week of April. That sounds about right. Maybe not sub zero in Mongolia at that time but definitely still freezing. China will be warm, hell maybe even shorts weather warm. Flowers blossoming, Great Wall…fruit to no end… im sure they have their own cheap beer to drink…yea. So for 2nd quarter break ill go do the visa dance with the Chineese embassy. Fun!

Last night I didn’t start to cook dinner until late. A simple soup concoction of sheep meat, a potato, half an onion and some noodles. Ive gotten pretty good at this of late and since I got to run that day I was certainly in the mood for some good grub. Well to cook on my stove I need to turn off my space heater as it will trip the breaker if anything more than one active appliance is running in my ger at one time (how many appliances do you have running at once every day???) so I cook it up, slurp it all down an sat to watch “Sit Down, Shut Up” for the 10,000th time in the last two years and as I did…I forgot to turn back on my space heater.

My space heater is really not impressive. Its over 10 years old and rattles like hell. If its warm the ger remains kinda cool. If its cold the ger remains kinda freezing. If the ger is freezing the ger remains freezing. This machine has one ONE singular but absolutely vital application. When it is sub-zero, it will keep the ger just freezing. I can sleep when it’s freezing, its not physically possible to sleep through sub zero if you don’t use your sleeping bag like I don’t. I woke up at two in the morning freezing my ass off and having no idea why. My coal fire had simmered down, but usually that residual warmth lasted till dawn.

I was groggy but finally I caught on that I hadn’t turned on my space heater and leapt out of bed to do so. The trouble was that now the ger was sub-zero and so I spent the rest of the night impressively cold. Live and learn I suppose.

Although in all fairness it is REALLY cold today. The wind came back with a vengeance and it feels like your fighting to walk into the wind every step of the way. I think It may be time to actually wear my winter coat instead of continuing to lug around the fall coat that my mother made me buy before coming to Mongolia. I still hate that coat, back in the states I have brand name the exact identical to the coat I brought here that was four years old and my mother demanded I buy a new one…I think at the end of my service ill leave this fall coat here so I can take back up the old blue coat back in the states. If coats had feelings the fact it got left behind must have really hurt it. Not that it matters, I always wear my black trenchcoat anyways. Given what I have been through and am going through ill be able to walk through a N.VA blizzard in a speedo and a top hat.

December 31, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Theme Song: “Time of Your Life” –By Green Day (its been cliché for so long that if you listen to it it actually sounds pretty nice again.)

Todays’ Quote: “To old friends, lost loves, broken promises and make sure we all give the devil his due” –a toast for all occasions, good or bad.

…well. How about that? End of the year 2010. The year of my life that I spent exclusively in Mongolia. Life is a funny thing. So I guess its time to pull some kind of lesson or philosophical quote out of my ass justifying my existence and summarizing what someone gains from such a way of life.

…

Guys I got nothing. My last year here (or year and a half) has truly been astounding. Yet to try to summarize this is like asking someone to summarize War and Peace. Yes you could, but there is no way you could cover everything. So if I cant summarize lets at least go down the list of things that happened.

I have been places I didn’t know existed, met people I didn’t know were there and did things I didn’t know I could do. I ran marathons AND ultramarathons. I drank my weight in vodka and ate a few sheep eyes to boot. I taught pains in the asses as well as possible future presidents, some of whom are one in the same. I lived in a shitty Soviet block apartment and came to terms with just how amazing that place was when I then moved into a tiny little tent. I survived subzero nights and sun boiling July afternoons. I was nearly killed many times on a horse, and I watched a passed out Mongolian on a horse literally fall on his face. I lived for months off the grid without internet and I lived in a tent while having T1 wireless a hundred yards away. I learned how to speak and understand the Mongolian language more and I learned how to start a coal fire from coal that literally is dug up 3 kilometers away from my town. I puked in a winter dell from too much vodka and buzz on Tsaagen Tsar. I have pushed meekers in subzero winters through ten feet of snow like my life depended on it (it did). I read a bible I had saved from being toilet paper at an outhouse, I read all the Harry Dresden and Star Wars books up to date. I lived through Mongolia’s coldest winter in 30 years. I met a really really hot woman who actually seemed to enjoy my company for a prolonged period of time even when I acted like myself (tall order!). I learned how to make more montage music videos both relating to Peace Corps and those just relating to boredom. I also wrote an extensive diary/blog that in my final six months I intend to edit and format into some sort of book to publish.

I…did stuff. Did I learn a lot? Yea I suppose so. Like I often mention I gained a great deal of relativity from my time in Mongolia. That is what Mongolia has taught me above all other things, relativity.

I imagine my first real encounter with relativity will happen when I get in line to fly back to America at the airport. Ill stand in line to get a ticket and I wont be scanning left and right looking for the fat Mongolian jerk who cuts in line or does not acknowledge its existence. I could stand in lines for hours now without a care in the world. Then ill get on a plane in which I have a 12 or so hour flight ahead of me. I could do that standing on my head (which I practically had to going to Dadal) but additionally I will have my own seat. As in I have a specific spot that is “mine” that only my butt gets to be on! Occasionally someone will even bring me foods and wines. I don’t think flying is ever going to be uncomfortable ever again.

Maybe the moment will be when I return to America and join a work force where its someones birthday and we have a cake where when they give me a piece they give me a fork AND a plate to eat it instead of just putting a slice in my hand.

Then back in America I am going to go to Giant the grocery store and stand in front of the Peanut Butter. There will be a jar of creamy…a jar of crunchy…and a jar of extra crunchy. I fear I may just curl up into a ball and start to seize when that display of options happens. Or it will be like that episode of the Simpsons where Mr. Burns is holding a bottle of ketchup and catsup for ten hours.

Then I will find some job somewhere where I will be doing bureaucracy that people actually read for some reason and “jobs with no real rush” on them are due within the hour. In essence Mongolia has demonstrated to a man like myself that there is a VERY very different world happening outside of the United States. Not even always for better or for worse either. It just is.

2010… I pledged to myself that I would not worry about my future, and I did that very well. Didn’t think about future jobs or careers, just let myself be here. I gotta say for the first 6 months of 2010 in which I had no internet for months on end THAT was a tall order. I read the small collection of books I had at the time, got REALLY good at Civilization IV (I hear the new one is not nearly as good) As time has passed I got better at interacting with my community so I was not alone as often as I had been before. This is not a country for introverts, no matter how many lonely nights I have been through. I am one of the most introverted people I know and this place has REALLY stretched my limit on that. I didn’t go crazy…didn’t go native, and if not for sheer dumb luck on the end of meeting a smoking hottie from Hong Kong would have been spent all on my own too. Peace Corps is to me in its own way a voluntary exile. A true test of my character.

Mom asked me two days before I left for service why I was doing this and while we had batted this question around before I finally summed it up pretty well. “I want to know if I am full of shit or not” I remember her nodding, not exactly a comment but I think she kind of got it. I was going to really do what everyone else talks about, and wow wishes were horses. I got a small little town with a rundown apartment and tent and in essence found the quietest, emptiest corner of nowhere and set down my bags for a rough 50th of my life. Yet unlike most exiles mine has a set expiration date.

Unfortunately, in a little over six months Peace Corps service will come to an end. So now with 2010 hours away from wrapping up its time for me to spend the next few months coming to terms with the rest of my life. Making another one of those watershed decisions that will for better or for worse effect every other decision of my life. I really need to stop running into these! Kibbutz? More Peace Corps? US Aid? Community College? PHD? High School History Teacher? What the hell happens now? In the words of the Buffy musical “where do we go from here?”

Ill narrow the decisions down by February but no matter what it is my ability to apply for most things will be hindered by my lack of a presence in America. At least I have my GRE’s all handled. So many Peace Corps Volunteers need to take those and must fly to Korea to do so. Nah I got that and my 2 rounds of MA programs already under belt. Of course, most those dealing with GRE are dreading the big upcoming 25 unlike my 30 here by February. 30’s are a good time to get the PHD right? Spend middle age working towards the doctorate and getting the professor job, make the money, embrace the gray hairs that I totally intend to highlight rather than dye. I imagine ill eventually need to get married in there too right? Some might read that and think “ah good…he got that Peace Corps adventure bug out of his system.” Its not like that at all…

Heres what I draw from my ideas of how to spend my life and it applies to everyone. There is NO bad way to spend out your life at all. Janitor/CEO/unemployed lay person/Peace Corps Volunteer/teacher/porn star/Civil War Reenacter/office drone… none of them are bad so long as it is what you want to do. I don’t work hard and play hard. I do what I love and love what I do…So the important thing is once you decide what it is you want to do you need to really try to enjoy yourself doing that thing. So if I go back to America and get a community college teacher job its not me “settling down” its me doing what I want at that time. The only person who you should care about what your doing with your life is yourself and THAT person should be the harshest critic you have.

So yea, 2010. Quite a year. Lots of highs and lows. Lots of twists and turns but let me tell you there is nowhere I would rather have been and there is nothing else I would rather have been doing.

Next year? 2011? Well, as 2010 proved to me you really never know. I got my year of not worrying about my future and it was quite relaxing, but I don’t think it will have the same degree of calmness and serenity of the last year. I get the strange feeling that while it wont always feel that way everything is going to work out fine in the end. I guess the only thing left to do is embrace it.

Meanwhile I have purchased and brought in 2 bottles of Bulgarian wine from Ulaanbaatar and a single bottle of “champagne” which I imagine will taste like “cooks” champagne from Giant (it should be so lucky) for just this occasion and not drank since Christmas to drop my tolerance so I sign off this reflection blog not with a quote but just a summary.

Ill never be the same again, and every decision for the rest of my life has been changed by my time here…so yea its sorta been like every year that has come before it since I was 24 years old.

Take care all…I platonically love you all. 2011…bring it on! (I am going to get tanked now)

Final PS: The President of Mongolia showed up to toast the new year on television…with a glass of milk. Seriously…probably the most pro-alcohol nation on the planet and the president doesn’t even want us to taper off. He wants everyone cold turkey. He received a round of boos from everyone watching TV with me at the time (all Mongolians) and I began to suspect and alien or robot of some kind had replaced the President. Baby steps dude, ask em to drink Champagne instead of Vodka instead dude…

January 1, 2011…wow…Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

2011 is the year of the Hare. To those playing the home game we in Mongolia follow the calendar of the animals, each one depicting its own type of year. The year of the Hare starts off well, and ends in disaster…hehehe…how enjoyable!

So, I got my oven back…for another three or so weeks. I get it now, it’s a Tsaagen Tsar thing. They want to make something special that requires an oven so they want to collect it for that purpose. So that means they don’t need it until the end of January. Well bollocks by that time do I really want to shell out the money to buy an oven for such a short use? No matter, I will celebrate with a grilled cheese sandwich tonight and then some pizza for next week. Havent made pizza since the beginning of December so that is overdue anyway.

January 2, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Good gods it felt so good to run today. I hate being able to run only once or twice a week, but I have to be careful. Today while running my….uh….well my penis got cold. Now luckily I noticed early and halfway through my run I “clenched” myself to ensure I wouldn’t get frostbite in a place I REALLY don’t want to get it, but it is something to seriously worry about! January is going to be a hard month, I can tell!

The wind disappeared. I know how crazy this is but there is still no snow on the ground. It hasent snowed in a month, and while it has been freezing or sub-zero everyday since aside from the ground ice chunks we really are still without snow. As I ran today I got to see further north, and despite being only 100km to the SE of UB we have just missed a great deal of snow that has blown through. Suits me, the all white look of last year was daunting, especially since it lasted for over 6 months.

So if memory serves correctly we should be entering the second “cycle” of the Mongolian winter. There are nine cycles about ten days long a piece. The peak at the 4th cycle (end of January towards the start of Feb), in which the horns of a 4 year old bull/ox crack (really no easy feat and unless it get impressively colder and a lot faster does not look like it will happen). The second cycle has to do with the freezing of Russian (ie: high alcohol content) vodka will freeze if exposed to the weather. In essence this means that Tsaagen Tsar (Mongolian New Year this time situated at Feb 3rd) will be when we start to go down in cold weather days to the point that you can see roads and go outside without everything on the planet freezing. In an earlier entry I decreed that reaching winter solstice was the halfway point of the winter. In terms of how dark it gets that is true, but I do have another month in which it gets progressively colder.

The weather definitely is picking up in terms of cold. Even with a roaring fire I cannot sit around in my boxers and at night I wear wool socks and the thermal pants to bed. Nothing for it, and its still wisps of nothing compared to the -50 nighttime temps of last year that lasted for weeks on end, but -40 is still nothing to blow your nose at either (you couldn’t anyways because your snot has frozen).

On the subject, I have another cold. This one is not bad at all, just a stuffy nose. I don’t even feel all that sick but I imagine this is inevitable when you do ger chores in the sub zero temps. A little over two more weeks and ill already be back in UB as the second quarter break finally arrives on the 19th of January. That’s a good time to spend a week in a heated building.

A quiet Sunday. The wind has finally started to pick up the pace. One of the reasons that we sleep in round tents is that they are best at deflecting the winds but they cannot keep out the absolute howl that comes from them. Beautiful in some ways, terrifying in others. I guess it just comes down to how well sheltered someone is from such elements.

January 3, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

In a mood. Its fracking cold outside and once again Sarangoo has invented another round of shit work for me to do. This time she wants her kids ready for their speaking “English Olympic” events. She seems to be of the mindset that though we only really teach and test grammar in classes (a fight I let go of long ago) we should still compete in events where the students speak English and that with three weeks until the competition begins it should be no problem for me to “whip the kids up into shape and have them speaking English”

I am and remain long past getting angry at stupid garbage like this, I just am impressed how no one around here bothers to try anything planned out and ahead of time when things could actually be productive. It’s inefficient and unproductive and does little except get our kids trounced by the UB kids who speak perfect English.

Nothing for it, nothing for it at all. As usual it boils down to me not exactly being swamped in work and feeling this is no worse a way to spend my time than anything else, just stupid really stupid. Its also cold…colder than I am even used to. Winter arrived at last.

…postscript: I went home and made a grilled cheese sandwich and forced myself to eat. Instantly I felt immensely better. I am far too tuned into my stomach! Its just another phase of us trying to compete with UB kids. We did it last year, we might as well go through the motions and do it again right?

January 4, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

(Note: This pry began on New Years Eve, but not to upset the end of year blog entry I put it off for a few days while I waited on some intel back from people I confide in and seek the console of)

I REALLY wish I had not snooped just now. It looks like Esther (actually her name is Lam) may not be able to make it up to Beijing in the end of March for when I head down into China. I am REALLY trying to get into the spirit of going to China for a while, but to be honest it’s a wall and tombs run with an acrobat show thrown in…it really is.

So today in a pouty mood I tried to think about what happens in the world around that time that I would LIKE to actually do. Only one things came to mind. Its date switches around a lot, so I did not think it was very likely that I was going to get it to synch with my vacation let alone the fact that I have no chance of throwing this together but I googled it and low and behold its happening between the 19th of March and the 4th of April. Then I did something even crazier and looked up flights for that time…and dammit if the ticket across a third of the world did not cost less than a thousand dollars.

…dammit am I going to go to Starkbierfest? Okay hear me out.

So I get off school on March 18th for 3rd quarter break. I am not due back to work until April 4th. What if…I took the train south to Beijing on the 19th of March. I stay in Beijing for a week, do the sights, shout the line from the wall, all that good stuff. Then…I take a plane from Beijing to Munich on the 26th. I know right!?!?! Well it gets better. After that I stay in Munich for the Strong Beer Festival, and then on April 2nd I take a flight through Moscow directly back to UB (avoiding a multi entry visa to China) The flight? $850. A one way flight from UB to Beijing is around 250-300 dollars, and I can fly over a third of the world from Beijing to Munich or from Munich to Ulaanbaatar for a little bit more than that. I have around 4000 bucks at my disposal right now not counting the 7 or so grand that comes from my end of service.

Am I really doing this???

January 5, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I hate teaching on Wednesdays. Actually I only teach one class, but as the warmest building I come to the school throughout the day where all the teachers (about 20 of us) all occupy a dorm room sized room and they get particularly roudy on Wednesdays. Too much free time for everyone I think…

Yep…im doing this. I know ive been there before, and I know that I have even done this festival before, but its just too well timed, too inexpensive for all the fly time and most of all its just too much fun to pass up.

Third week of January ill go to the Chinese embassy and find out what it takes to get that annoying and expensive visa and once I have that I will start booking the tickets and doing the paperwork with Peace Corps. I want no repeat of my Khovsgul vacation where everyone seemed to think I was dead…

Not even Peace Corps Mongolia can keep me from my German beer festivals. China AND Germany…heck ill even spend three hours each way on layover in Moscow….Who has a cooler life than me huh????

I had conferred with my father, mother and stepfather to sorta be a sounding board and make sure I was not doing anything crazy, but they all seemed to think that my plan was abandoning China altogether and going straight to Munich! When I told them I am going to try to do both that is when they all realized that I may be a little nuts indeed.

January 6, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

2nd quarter wraps up in two weeks. Couldn’t come soon enough! I mentioned earlier that 2nd quarter really is the tough one. Not tough as in lots of work, more like it is tough to keep in high spirits. It also means that my counterpart needs to write lesson plans to coincide with her unit plans, neither of which she uses, and in all fairness no Mongolian teacher uses them, and based on my time in the American school system I am willing to lay money that no teacher actually uses this as an actual teaching guide. It’s paperwork to make the administrators who supervise teachers look important. The truth hurts, and then it sets you free…

So English teachers are the only ones who type their lesson plans in English. The fact that my training manager and principal cant read or understand English is all the more amusing as it means we probably could write for our 5th grade lesson plans “We are going to teach our students the comprehensive evaluation on the preparation of mixed drinks like Mai Tai, Seabreezes and Zombies. The “Comprehensive Evaluation” would totally be the only words they would be looking for and therefore approve it. There are a lot of advantages to living in a Mongolian town or city where people have actually worked on their Mongolian. The odd joke I get to play on them is one of the few advantages of the other setup like the one I have.

Sarangoo has once again simply given me her old templates and told me to write hers up. Its that type of work I described in my last entry, but the standing argument that its not like I have any other prior engagements makes me just smile as she hands me her work from last year to update.

Two months from now I imagine it will happen again to the 3rd quarter stuff. Oh plz oh plz Sky Father and the Lords of Kobold give me strength!

Changing subjects!!! There are pineapples for sale in my stores. Okay, I know it’s a mild winter, but that’s a little scary. Pineapple…PINEAPPLE!!!! This is from the same town that had beets, carrots and potatoes last year.

I think I know what this is though. Tsagen Tsar is less than a month away, and this stuff is for partying. Actually noone would ever dream cut up a pineapple, but rather use it as pineapples outside of the tropics are always used as a decorative piece on a fruit platter for all to see and eat. I sorta keep scanning it again and again wondering if I was just making this up or looking at a disfigured apple.

My town still has cherry tomatoes and bell peppers. That also was a luxury that tapered off by October last year and did not return until May. Occasionally instead of drinking I buy those and make a lettuceless salad. My vegetarian has been patient for far too long, and this whisps of meatless days are making it realize that before long ill be back to hummus/pita/fruit/wine non stop. I really promise I am not counting the days, its just something that was so far away I couldn’t even consider it. My brain feels one way but my body is definitely demanding another.

Germany always had the best cherries… and strawberries… mmmm… strawberries. Who would have thought that going to Germany would entice someone to NOT have to eat meat! Oh…I just remembered….the pretzels!!!! Beer….wine…. the Augustinerskeller… Bierkeller 90…. the open air market beer garden… dammit snap out of it! Your eating horse meat soup and potatoes tonight!

January 7, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Didn’t feel like forming pizza dough today, so I made Bruschetta instead. Worked really well, especially because the bread is not the loaf stuff that I usually love. There’s a woman in Ondortolge that pretty much owns a bakery, and for 650 tugriks she makes loaves of bread that look like the stuff you buy in you American grocery store minus the slicing. The alternative and usually far more available stuff is just a round shaped loaf that is made in bulk in UB and found pretty much across the country. The ones the Ondortolge woman has are great for grilled cheese sandwiches, but the other type don’t. They do once you slice them though make for a great bruschetta stick, so that’s on the menu for today. I also was able to procure some cherry tomatoes to chop up as toppings anyway. I put a chunk of the cheese my family shipped to me for topping, much more effective at melting than the lunch cheese stuff I can buy in my delguur. Each passing day my culinary diversity widens and widens.

No alcohol this weekend. Spent a tad more than I expected of late and after the running I got in I feel pretty good of late without the desire to stupefy myself for comfort. The great seesaw battle of what to blow money on. Food that is not potatoes or alcohol….food wins this weekend.

January 8, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Weekend at last. I like weekends. Kids with UB parents are usually there and the school is MUCH tamer during this time. Noone comes to school unless they can use the internet. So its me and the kids with the One Laptop Per Child computers. I even occasionally do a small computer club when we get enough of us.

This last week, I dunno why but I was cranky as all hell. Its as an old M20 (old in times past not age) Nathan once said. Days last forever, but at the end of the week it feels like time has flown by. I am okay with that, at least on Saturdays.

Did another water carry today. 70 liters of water is heavy as hell, and even with a cart the handling of water in sub zero temps and wind can be hazardous. By the time I finally had gotten the jug back into my ger my pinky finger on my right hand was acting funny. I recognized the feeling, hadn’t had it happen since I pushed the meeker through the snow about a year ago. My pinky was….sluggish. I have no knowledge of its term medically but if my assessment is correctly my finger was getting ready to stop reacting to impulses sent by my body. It was on the fence, ready to slide one way or another. Its actually a little scary to encounter when you are in your ger knowing your in the process of warming yourself but you don’t know if you pushed yourself too long. Luckily feeling returned soon enough….but still…close call. Luckily I now have more than enough water to last the next few weeks, and by then ill need the container to be mostly empty so I can go to UB without the thing exploding.

January 9, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

No snow on the ground…were approaching the 3rd cycle of the Mongolian winter and still the only snow to be seen is the residual stuff from a brief snowstorm we had over a month ago. Its still just as cold as last year (maybe a few degrees warmer, but still subzero during the day and night) but without snow. Its strange, back in America on the East Coast snow is always an indicator that it is cold out. Here snow is so very different both in feel but also what it does to us.

A year ago I joined 2500 people of my town with picks and shovels as we dug out the road between Bagakhangai and Ondortolge. Snow truly cut us off. Walking was a perilous mission as every step brought you onto snow that had been crushed down to the most glistening of all ice blocks. I still walk on dirt.

Such a different experience this year than last. That was key to the last six months of living here being so enjoyable. The weather was mild and every experience was new. New counterpart, new town (sorta), new place to live, and more. Now at 6 months to go the new stuff is routine, and while not depressed boredom has begun to take its toll. February has a lot of holidays and begins to SLOWLY pull us to warmer temps, its this blasted January that takes forever to go through. Even the 2nd quarter break is not a full week off of school. Toughen up soldier!!!

January 10, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I just got off the horn with probably the rudest man ive ever not had to meet. I am actually in a good mood so its not like I had a bad reaction to anything. I just needed to know what a Chinese Visa requirement was for an American at the embassy in Ulaanbaatar. After being sworn at (IN ENGLISH!!!!) He then rattled off this list.

$160 which must be paid in US dollars to the teller themselves. (I would need to withdraw tugriks, and then go to an exchanger to get that amount….rounding up the exhange rate it would be around $200

proof of a flight out of the country (that I could do…but still?!?!? How many Americans are trying to live in China?)

Copy of bank account information

5 blank pages in my passport (don’t have in my original passport….and wtf?)

passport photos (don’t have…yea I can get em…)

itinerary ( 1)show up 2)stand on the wall and shout in South Park fashion…”Geawd Damnn Mongoleans…Staap Bwakeng Dooown Miine SCHitty WAWW!!!!” 3)go drink for five days)

one week wait… (meaning I need to bring all this together on a weekday IE: miss school come back a week later on a weekday IE: Miss school and pray to Sky Father nothing has gone wrong to collect visa’d passport which does not have enough blank pages)

This is what is required for an American in Mongolia to get the most basic run of the mill visa to the Peoples Republic of China. This is supposed to be a vacation, something without stress to enjoy…and they throw all this at it??? And to see a wall?...i don’t have the time and patience to work out a tour thing and the only thing I really want to do in China is see that blasted wall!?!

The train ticket cost from UB to Beijing was also way higher than I expected but putting all this together may have tipped the scale. I may just go to Munich in March for the festival and fly right back. The flight in and out of UB costs $850. There is no visa requirements. I know the place, love the place. The guesthouses (hostels) are under $15 a night thanks to it being off season…yea a slightly longer stay in Munich it is then!

China I can go to after Peace Corps service depending on how much I have left and what my future prospects look like. Failing that…well, China is not a young mans country anyway. The wall is not going anywhere, and it sounds like visa requirements in America are much much easier to work around.

Actually this all formed throughout the day. Before I decided to pull the plug I also received a nice surprise about JUST how cheap Munich guesthouses are in the off season. $14 a night for the one I looked up. Well…I mean even ten days in town is less than $150. That’s less than the cost of a Chinese Visa alone! Add on the plane ticket and 10 days round ticket is 1000 bucks…. now all I gotta buy is beer and food since I already own lederhosen (ebay)

Strange how things come together sometimes.

January 11, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “That guy wasent gay he had a mustache!” -Pierce

Month 19…cool.

I have taken up a new habit of late. I have always been prone to facial hair. Don’t use a razor for about 5 days and I have a full sized beard from ear to ear. It must be a civil war ancestry thing I think…anyway. I went through my beard phase in my early 20’s and since then have come to loathe all facial hair, and it simply meant I shave and shave a lot.

Additionaly a mechanical razor just doesn’t give off the clean shaven look quite as well, and prior to Peace Corps I usually just bought the razors and shaved. Even during my first year of service when I had running water (cold but running) I shaved without cream and without a mirror. Very impressive I must say myself. I saw the writing on the wall when I reached the ger, and my dear sweet mother was kind enough to send an electric razor to me. I would have bought one here but that might have been complicated. Men don’t grow a lot of facial hair out here that quickly. Most pictures Mongolians have of Chinngis Khan are of him with the large Merlin shaped white beard, no doubt demonstrating how unique he was to have been able to grow something like that!

Well I am not growing a beard, but I have begun to shave in the evening with my electric razor instead of the morning, it means that I am rocking the scruff look. Now in America, this would look rather ugly, and even I admit its not my default style, but as they have seen me clean shaven for a while I am definitely providing my fellow teachers with some impress as they see my facial hair grows across my entire face!

Lots of people wanting to touch it. A few guys in peace Corps not only have beards, but red ones too! (Tripp even had one!) No doubt to the amusement of their communities as any hair color other than black or dark brown is very uncommon.

On the home front I found tucked away in a corner of the Railway shop a cheese grater. It has probably never been used to grate cheese in this town but for me this will greatly help in the creation of pizzas with more sporatic cheese. Its great that in UB I can buy the block stuff and use that on the pizzas. The dude who runs American Burgers and Fries was kind enough to tell me one night where I could get ahold of blocks of cheese in UB. Those keep very well, and make all the difference between the lunchbox cheese you can buy in my town. Its funny, a few months ago the discovery of any cheese brought me to new levels of euphoria. Now that I have that I am hunting out better types of cheeses for my pizzas now. Its all relative, and we can always want more. How much we ever actually NEED…well last year demonstrated to me how little actually is.

January 12, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Okay, I cry foul! I just got done reading the news and saw that a female teacher in America has been caught sleeping with one of their male students. We like to cry over the little things in America, and I know how insensitive it sounds to call something like statutory rape a little thing but there is a point here. I have many theories on why this is but to prevent digression I will point out I cant really think of any news story I have ever heard of teachers in Mongolia sleeping with their students (I imagine the numbers may rise when you hit college but lets keep it at the K-12 range for now) but in America the story is very different. I don’t cry foul about teachers being punished for sleeping with their students, I cry foul on a sexist characteristic about this.

I have been meticulous about looking up crimes committed in America where teachers sleep with their students since I became a teacher back in 2006. I have always been VERY paranoid that even the baseless accusation from a student can destroy a perfectly innocent teacher. I always keep my classroom open, never drank near the bars of my schools, and most of all I kept electronically off the grid when I was in the presence of those as on the grid as myself. Luckily I’ve never been accused of everything and I pray to the Lords of Kobold that I never am. There is something aggravating about these news reports other than teachers violating their students.

What infuriates me is that when a male teacher seduces a student he’s either thrown to the wolves or locked up for 10-25 years. THAT should ALWAYS happen!!! What you may not know if you do not keep track of it is that a great number of the secondary education public school teacher seducers are in fact women, and that they are never brought to justice in the same way as their male counterparts. Mary Kate Letourneau had sex with a 13 year old student and spent less than six months in jail! The majority of female teachers who seduce their male students spend less than a year in jail and then get released on probation.

Most also do not even have to register as sex offenders after their release. Mary didn’t the first time she raped that kid, only when she did it again less than a month after being released from jail did she have to register as a sex offender. Imagine if the genders were reversed, that guy would never see the light of day again.

Those who make the community aware of sex offenders seldom bother to let people know that they are in the community either.

FOUL!!! Impressive foul!!!!

To further annoy me the people I expect to receive support of this imbalance of justice do not make a lot of noise about it. Liberals and feminists especially! The idea that female teachers who seduce their students is less of a crime than their male counterparts not only is inaccurate but it takes away from the trauma this puts on anyone affected by this crime.

The arguments as to why female teachers receive lesser punishments only make their case worse. Most commonly I am told that women teachers are not forcing themselves on the men and that the male student is just lucky as hell. This is what makes me more upset than any other statement on this subject.

Rape has NOTHING to do about sex or even liking something. Think of it like this: If a woman has an orgasm during a rape is it a rape? People under age are not allowed to give consent to sex and therefore cannot be considered consensual, regardless of enjoyment, gender or even wanting it.

Additionally how does that not work the other way? If an attractive male teacher consensually sleeps with their butt ugly female student how is the female student not just lucky as hell?

The reasoning behind this is as simple as it is fundamentally wrong. There is a standard set up where what men do to women is considered more destructive than anything a woman could do to a man. There’s a word for that type of thinking…its called sexism.

Argue anything you want against that, some of which are even academic good points but the reason those women don’t go to jail for 25 years or more is because a double standard exists and continues to exist until more people realize that the battle against sexism is about getting it right and not getting even!

I’m sorry for getting worked up this just really annoys me. Too often the feminist movement I think is so busy trying to undo establishment sexism they occasionally forget certain areas where an eventual equality among men and women does not necessarily mean advantageous to women. It’s like women who advocate being allowed to serve in the military but not be required to enroll in the draft.

Ladies, I support women being fully integrated into the military, much like Israel. I don’t think though women should “choose” to serve in the military, I sure as hell can’t choose! You can’t ask for the “right” to serve in the military and not the “responsibility.” When I turned 18 I was required to enroll in the draft, and no woman in America has to do that. I don’t get to choose if I want to fight or not if drafted. Ladies on the other hand still remain allowed to join the armed forces if they so choose but if we get into a “Red Dawn” situation they get to sit that whole mess out. Feminism is an important and just advocacy movement, but you cannot selectively choose where equality should shine, even if in other fields women are still not considered male equals by all. All or nothing everyone…all or nothing.

…okay so I got started on that. What was my point? I think we started somewhere about statutory rape and got to me complaining women are not in the draft. In all fairness though I made some valid points for all the ranting I did.

January 13, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Bored. Ive been a little more bored of late than I expected myself to be. I guess there is only so many things you can watch on youtube before you start to go a little batty. I tried to think about what I was doing last winter and realized that the inability to play video games on my computer anymore really does give me a lot more time than I expected it would. Nothing bad about it or for it. My computer will black screen if I stress the damaged video card and so I find myself simply resigned to typing and email. Meh…few more months and Spring is here. Maybe not shorts weather but enough to get me outside and walking around. There is still hardly any snow anywhere. Freaky in some ways not to compared to what it was like last year.

I could lie or not even talk about it, but it’s a well known but little spoken fact that alcohol is indeed a way to pass boredom too. I don’t advocate it or recommend it but much like last year there are many a days at 4 in the afternoon where you think to yourself…so what do I do for the next 8 hours?

I drink the mid shelf vodka. The staples if you will. Not gutrot and not the Grey Goose (or the Mongolian equivalent) I could make mixed drinks but that would only sully the good taste of juice so I just take it by shot. I drink alone, not out of alcoholism or to not feel sad or anything like that. I drink alone because if I were to drink with my fellow countrymen, they would make me drink more than I would like and they are not all quite as good at keeping themselves sane as I am when drunk. I LOVE living in a soum, but the real drawback I can think of is being the only foreigner in town. No Peace Corps buddy that I can sit around with where we each have our own beer and drink at our own pace. Meh…ill survive. Made it this far after all.

Vodka…one of the things I am REALLY not going to miss about Mongolia. Vodka, outhouses and rabid dogs are the things not to miss.

January 14, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today was a day of health. Mental, Psychological and Physical health. Was a little overdue too. I have spent one too many days drinking a little more vodka than I should have. One too many days not outside running or exercising (it is sub zero outside with howling wind most of the time though) and one too many days wearing clothes that I only hand wash. I needed a day where every chore and act I did on the grand scale made me feel better. I got it today.

It was the last day of the school week and when I finished my last class I turned off my computer. I made a run to the well with my container. It was half full, but I was going to be using a bunch of water and the line for the well was relatively short. The well is our towns water cooler/coffee maker. It’s the place where us ger dwellers circle around to watch the well slowly chug up water to fill our containers while we gossip and chatter.

I don’t use as much water as my counterparts do or at least that’s what they were talking about to one another wondering why it had been so long since I had gathered any liquids. We talked about who was pregnant now and who made a fool of themselves last week walking around drunk after getting kicked out by his wife. We sit outside while chatting and even on windless days it’s a little too cold to enjoy this very much but I can see how the well is definitely a point of consolidation for the towns ger dwellers.

With a full tank of water I stopped over to the store and bought yeasts, flours, carrots, potatoes, cherry tomatoes, bell peppers and some vinegar (I am pretty certain I am the only one buying vinegar in town) It cost more than enough but like last weekend I was passing on alcohol in favor of some really good and healthy food.

The wind this afternoon was still beautifully absent and before it could change its mind I put on my running clothes and headed out. I have to be careful when running in the winter. Run too fast and your body will start sweating in under 10 minutes. When you run 45 minutes like I do if you get your body to sweat early near the end of the run your sweat will be freezing cold, severely dropping your body temp. Ive had a close call or two, but I am pretty good at keeping myself from sweating for the first 20 minutes. I got back from the run feeling exactly what I wanted. My legs didn’t hurt, but they had stressed themselves, and the sweat I had coming out of me felt so purifying, like so much oxidants and even stress itself had come out of my pores. I filled up my sink with water and stood in my tumpin.

It was time to finally wash. Not wash like I do everyday where you get the “Carlin 4” (George Carlin’s guide to what you need to be sure is clean. Armpits Ass Crotch Teeth) No this was going to be a shower that took more than a single liter of water! Spoiled myself I really did. In all fairness it has been several weeks since I last had a hot water shower so yes I imagine if I had a sense of smell I may have been a little smelly but just to completely douse my hair in water again and then actually soap up my body. Black water formed in my tumpin’s lining.

With the shower handled I got my work clothes together and scrubbed them. REALLY scrubbed them. Cleaning your clothes by hand is a LOT harder than you think. Not just time consuming but intensive on your muscles if your actually trying to clean stuff. Two pairs of khakhis and three formal shirts later I had clothes that were only going to get cleaner if I had a washing machine. That cleaning would at least hold them for a week! I so wish I had taken a picture of my tumpin water before throwing it out.

The final thing I did was make myself some pizza and salad for dinner. Actually I am still working on that now, listening to my favorite band Within Temptation do their thing. I am waiting for the pizza dough bread to rise. I am SO glad I really got to clean house in so many ways. I could feel how easy it is in the slow lull of day to day life to build pressure. I am going to sleep SO well tonight.

Good start to the weekend marking the end of the 2nd quarter. We may have colder days ahead of us…but somehow it feels on a day like today that each day is going to feel better and better…all the way up until the warm days of summer.

January 15, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Its about time my town and the rest of the Mongolians are gearing up for Tsaagen Tsar. Though there are plenty of “days” in Mongolia rarely do any of them get people off work. Only two really big type holidays like that: Naadam in the summer and Tsaagen Tsar in the winter. We celebrate Tsaagen Tsar on the start of the fifth 9th of the winter cycle. Its purpose? The equivalent of the temperature new year. Solstice may be in late December and that may be the darkest it gets, but Mongolia gets colder and colder up until the fifth cycle of nine. It is at this point that we have a feast to both get a good full meal in our bodies, but also to celebrate that each day after that brings us to warm weather and grass on the ground for the animals and open fields to ride on. Its also a time for us to visit friends and family and to welcome them to all that we have to eat and drink and to show how we hold nothing back and offer all we have to those we live among… or at least that is the romantic notion behind it. Its all that, and three days off of school and all the vodka and buzz with mayonnaise soaked potato salad your liver and stomach can take.

I like the holiday, it’s the closest thing to Thanksgiving, and the mood is the same. Lots of talk about food and family. Last year it was hard for me to get into the spirit of the holiday. I am not accustomed to just going to my neighbors door dressed in a winter dell and am expected to just eat food and drink that they stuff down my throat. Eventually the teachers lassoed me into a bit of an apartment crawl.

So to prepare each home and family will make thousands of buzz. Those wonderful little dumplings of sheep and goat meat. They will buy shelves and shelves of vodka, and the wealthier members of the community will even buy the “Chinngis” brand vodka. It costs about $7 for a 750ml bottle, and tastes better than Grey Goose. Its 2 days pay for me so imagine the cost to someone in the town! This bankrupts families who all want to put on a good show for their neighbors.

As a result, the govt helps out. Each member of the community gets around 50,000 tugriks as a subsidy to help pay for everything. For some reason the school has become the place where members of the community come to gather their coupons for the subsidy, it has made the school a little noisier and louder place than I am used to on weekends. Nothing for it, and I do like the holiday so I take it in spirit.

I am also in a jolly mood for this years Tsaagen Tsar because I get to do something that I didn’t get to last year. I will go the day before to UB and immediately catching a ride to Erdene because I will be going to my Mongolian family for Tsaagen Tsar this year! Oh I am SO syked to see them all again. I haven’t gotten to since we dropped in for a night with Esther back in July. I get to go through the holiday with them in addition to a few fellow PCV’s visiting their families as well. I even caught a ride back to my town on the second day of Tsaagen Tsar so I will have a day and a half to go to every home I want to in Bagakhangai as well.

Getting good and exciting around here…

January 16, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Good weekend! Got to run twice, got to eat well and I slept better than I had in a long long while. The lack of wind was critical. It really does -20 to -60 or makes -20 feel like something you could walk around in with a banana hammock.

Well this week only goes until Wednesday, and then we put all of the 2nd quarter behind us. That’s it, I can feel it in my bones. The last month or so. Not a rut, but difficult and uncomfortable days. Its all going to be so much easier to enjoy myself. The running helped.

January 17, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Note: The opinions I am going to stress are mine alone and do not represent anything about the Peace Corps or the American government. That goes without saying and is on the top of the blog but this entrys kinda touchy so I just want to put it down here again to be sure everyones on board.

Im gonna talk about the shooter in Arizona. I have been living outside of the United States for over 19 months now. I have gotten my news from Mongolian newspapers, from BBC world news, Al Jazeera, Mongolia news networks, and the internet news networks of CNN, ABC, Foxnews and so forth.

I used to think we just advertised them more. Bleed its leads type of thing. Infotainment and the like. Maybe its because of gun laws, maybe a million other things but as time has gone on I have come to a conclusion. America is where crazy people go on rampages. Simple as that. Scan the history of Mongolia, heck even look into the history of the million person populated city of Ulaanbaatar and you will never find anything like this. Columbine, VA Tech, church holdups, Wisconsin school (is that where the kid held his class hostage?) and now Arizona. I wish I could tell you that America just advertise it the most, but I have learned that for whatever the case that is just not true. America is where rampages happen.

Are there murders in Mongolia? Yes, if you look up enough of them some probably even happen by gun, somehow I doubt it, and there has never been any “rampages” like America has done. Its not due to lack of means either. There certainly are enough guns in this country. I personally can vouch that every ger around Lake Khovsgul has a rifle that works in it. My training manager who lived next door to me last year owned and showed me his own rifle and he lives in an apartment block. Its situated next to his bed, disassembled fortunately but in very plain and accessible site with 2 pre teen kids living in the same room as the weapons.

Are there distraught or disgruntled people in Mongolia? Yep. Not any different than America either. Heck this country even has its own brand of Neo-Nazis. Seriously they use the non Tibetan Swastikas and dress like SS officers! They held a rally on Sukbaatar Square not too long ago either. Mongolia has a liberal drinking policy and so people upset can further enrage themselves by turning to drink as well, but once again these people never find themselves carrying out a crazy act of violence like has happened time and again in America.

Like America in small but sufficient numbers Mongolia has guns, cities, racists, alcohol and crazy people, but no lethal rampages. Why? What is the secret formula that brings about the carnage in America?

I don’t have an answer here, only the statement that I am sorry America but we are the only country where these rampages keep seeming to happen, and I have NO plausible explanation behind it.

January 18, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Didn’t need to hear this. My school has decided to push back its 2nd quarter break until the 26th of January. This means they are linking the holidays of the 2nd quarter break and Tsaagen Tsar. Not at all a bad idea except the the fact that I really could use a warm bed and some well rounded meals. I hate January…

January 19, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

My haasha family is fighting lately. Mom and Dad seem to be at odds about something and they are rarely in the same ger together. Dad comes over to borrow my phone. He barks some pretty harsh words into the phone and then retires back to his ger. Not a fun month for a lot of people huh! Screw the cold and wind, im going running!

Postscript: Very glad I did that. I found an elusive yellow pepper in my delguur today and so I bought that with the traditional green and red ones to help make a salad…Good eatings tonight! Running…it turns any day upsidedown!

January 20, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

There’s something funny about perspective. I don’t know how I noticed it today but after walking into my yard for the thousandth time today at the end of school I noticed something I hadn’t before. Nothing really had changed. I like my yard. Its not special or remarkable, but I like it for the same reason that we like our own silverwear or our own blanket. Its “mine.” Yet I have nothing no one else doesn’t…or do i?

The dog barked fierce (relax, he knows my scent and knows im friend not foe) the pile of coal is where it always is. My dad was walking around chain smoking and three guys I didn’t recognize were all working on a single car jacked up on builders bricks among the other three broken down cars/jeeps that are parked in our yard like it is all the time. I was instantly asked for my phone so my dad could also make his weekly shouting phone call to his wife whose still not all that interested in talking to him.

It must be because I actually live in the home, but I am in “that” home aren’t i? The one on the suburban block that everyone knows and laughs at right? Homicidal dog, broken down cars, angry residents. It’s the trifecta of the backwater yard/home.

Hehehe…we even had bombs in a corner of the yard not too long ago too….

It may not be easy to live in Mongolia, but when you stop and catch up to the moment living in Mongolia is pretty damn amazing and one of a kind. Earlier today I read some of my 2009 blog entries. Two years ago this month I was eating Brussels sprouts and egg paste with a nice glass of red wine with two beautiful women in the servants quarters kitchen of a mansion inhabited by the President of Pratt University in Brooklyn, NYC. Now I find myself here, the other side of the world in a tiny little railroad town of Mongolia living in a home/yard like this one and eating sheep meat from the sheep my neighbor at the end of the block killed a few weeks ago and heating my home just above the freezing mark with regional coal and the sound of a loud passing railroad less than 100 meters away in Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Dave Matthew, now THAT’S funny the way it is!

January 21, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

MUCH better week than last. Especially considering I had thought earlier this week that Wednesday would be our last day before the break. Now I just need to get through Monday and Tueday next week and ill be in UB for some R+R+B (Relex, Recreation and Beer)

Tonight I am going to drink some vodka and watch a crappy movie that I am long overdue in seeing: Snakes on a Plane. After all the buildup and hype I never saw it. I cant remember why I never got around to it either. Go crappy movie go!

Postscript:

I swear though the movie is no worse than say “Deep Rising” from 1998. Better still, can you imagine what it would be like if it had debuted now when 3-D movies are all the rage?

I think the fighting between my haasha mother and father is taking a turn for the worse. Tonight I have in my guest for company my little brother Ulaaka. Nice enough of a kid in small doses, but he has been running around messing up my ger and breaking my stuff because I believe that his mother or his father have had such a fight that neither has come home tonight and so he has no real way of getting into his locked ger. As it is -50 outside babysitting duty has fallen to me tonight, and while this is the only time this has happened I hope in terms of unannounced babysitting jobs it is also my last. Again, hes really a sweet kid, but he likes to pretty much break everything he touches in my ger, and its only a miracle that I have kept him away from my computer. He is also a dyed in the wool Mongolian, and so the food I had at my disposal to feed him was not up to par. Mongolians, like everyone but Americans hate peanut butter. You know, peanut butter was invented in America. Pretty much it’s the only 100% authentic American food. Would explain why no matter where I go in the world I am the only one who seems to eat the stuff. Luckily I had a backup roll of deli meat so I could get something in him. He hated my peanut granola bar too.

January 23, 2011. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Today’s Quote: “I am your father’s brothers, nephews, sisters, mother’s domestic partener’s roommate!” –Lord Helmet

Small and intricately connected world. I apparently am going to meet someone next time I drop into UB. Well that’s one way of meeting someone I suppose! We have been going back and forth by email for the past few days. Instantly my mood lifted. Just talking in such detail about ridiculous things that only a fellow American living in Mongolia could comprehend and respond in kind…there is something deeply psychological about that. I guess when Caitlin took off and I didn’t have anybody to txt message the calming effect that had on me went unnoticed until I found myself in a month not really talking outside of my superficial Mongolian conversations about potatoes, weather, cold, gers and teaching.

January 24, 2011 Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Something very annoying happened today. Once again my school screwed around with its schedule at the last minute, and changed the date we have the Monita party from tonight to the 26th. I am going to UB the 26th, and I specifically modified my schedule on the basis that the 24th was when Monita happens. Well, sorry guys, I am not screwing around with my schedule. I bought my Mon

I rarely…actually never write blogs that are not simply an archive of my daily thoughts, but like many PCV’s we heard about or saw on the internet the news about the 20/20 ABC news report about the Peace Corps, and I feel compelled to write something about this

Lets be clear from the beginning: These opinions are mine, mine alone and in no way represent the United States Government or anything about the Peace Corps. Lets also be clear that I am well aware that I am a 29 year old 6’4 caucasian male who can at least pretend to look halfway like the kind of person that you would think twice about bothering, so a lot of the difficulties and hardships some of my fellow volunteers go through I do not, but even with that in mind I feel as though I can make some valid points.

First off, I want everyone to be aware that 20/20 and ABCnews actually upgraded their story throughout the week. At first they were only talking about rape cases or sexual assault and suddenly yesterday the story about the death of a Peace Corps volunteer came up. Its strange, but your never quite aware of just how much of a slant the media actually has until it attacks something that you are a part of in some way. I didn’t know any of the volunteers the report mentions, I don’t know the background, I don’t know the people and I cant comment towards any of that. All I can do is tell you what I know.

I know that the Peace Corps staff I have worked with both American and Mongolian have never done anything but shown the utmost concern for my safety and well being. Ive never told them anything that they ignored or even sat on, they are always interested in finding ways to make sure I am as safe as I possibly can be. I know that the well being of Peace Corps volunteers is the NUMBER ONE concern of everyone who supervises me. And they don’t nearly get enough thanks for that!

I don’t take away about the seriousness of what the news special brought up. Rape and murder are naturally extremely serious and should be regarded as such. Yet from my own take on the news report it was about as one-sided as you could possibly get. Seriously, the only people taking part in the conversation were those who were victims or families of victims. Again I understand why they would answer in the way that they did but to the people in the American public who don’t experience Peace Corps the way volunteers do it is probably the only thing they have heard about us in terms of details and I can only imagine what they must be thinking.

We join the Peace Corps very aware that while every possible precaution is taken we are not volunteering at the Hilton ladies and gentlemen! As much as I may love what I do this is not a vacation I am on everybody. One of the three goals of the Peace Corps is to go to places that have need for skilled manpower and to volunteer our time and expertise in assisting others. That means we go to places that aren’t as bright and utopian as where you live. I have lived for over a year in a half in one of the poorer countries on the planet.

We may not be night patrolling the streets of Falluja, but we are in the places of the world where there is more crime and murder than in your suburban neighborhood. There is crime, there is murder, there are even a small number of xenophobes in this country who would very much not want me here (I even have a picture of Mongolians dressed up like SS officers at Sukbaatar Square.) There is a chance that something horrible might happen to me here, or any one of us for that matter. I don’t say that it is not a tragic loss if that happens, but all of us are here knowing that very slim risk exists. You should not make one of the last of the Great Society projects out to be unsafe and uncaring by only looking at the tragic losses of the 200,000 of us who have served in this organization, the exceeding overwhelming majority of us successfully and without incident.

The Peace Corps is far from perfect, but what 20/20 showed….thats as inaccurate out of context as you can get. Take it from me, I work for it!

This was on Mongolian television non stop around last summer at the World Cup. I had a lot to upload back then and not much now so i finally put it up. At least this video and song finally got rid of "We Are The World" It was on every ringtone in the country. Watch the Naadam competition and during the anthem you can see Elberdorgs phone going off and Michael Jacksons blasted song play. (okay no you cant, but you get the idea!) Ill get a few photos loaded by the end of the month to go with Januarys blog. Trust me guys its been a boring month! If you keep listening the two guys each do a segment in Mongolian. Thats hard to do as the verb is now at the end of the line instead of after the subject.

The key to taking a successful picture while wearing a dell is to act as though you had nothing more unique on than a t-shirt that says "Hillary 08" on it! Otherwise you will feel like every picture you take is staged.

I love this picture. Its me and the overwhelming majority of the old Erdene crew the night before thanksgiving. We just all somehow showed up to this place and reminisced. It was great to see everyone again, and we all looked so different in some ways, though i am the only one with a different configuration of hair! That old gang of mine...

This is when Peace Corps is done eating Thanksgiving food so we go to a roller ring, take over the place, drink lots of GEM beer and start manly dancing...its a Peace Corps thing...

This is the workout poster i talk about in the blog below about how all my kids exercise indoors doing drills like these. Doesnt it look like they are learning to do the chicken dance???

A salad of colored peppers, cherry tomatoes, onion and carrots (i didnt want cabbage and lettuce is only in UB) Not a bad round of fiber. The vegetarian in me is getting a little impatient for meals like this all the time these days

Another popular game by Peace Corps called "Set" you sorta have to play it to understand but it really stresses seeing patters and discrepancies as quickly as possible. Lots of fun.

Settlers and wine at Thanksgiving. First ever all 6 players playing too. I lost but it was a tight game throughout by all. We PCV's are quite good at that game. Its sorta our D+D.

I miss thanksgiving in the states...but we had food ill give ourselves that. It was strange to be back at the same hotel lobby, doing the same thing a second time. The 21's were all so giddy and the 20s all seemed to be the silent savoring ones this year.

After a first round of pretty much everything i resigned myself to salads and fruit. The vegetarian in me is demanding emancipation! Patience patience!

Need a translator for that one?

It feels like an episode of Sesame Street. "One of these things it doesnt belong here!!!"

Scout Ceremony. Sarangoo is the scout leader. These kids are actually allowed to wear their scout uniform rather than the school uniform if they so choose.

Might as well be hazing instead of initiation. Ah well, it seems like only 17 years ago i was jumping through hoops at scout meetings too. Go progressive Mongolia go

Even at its Ugliest, there is something to find beautiful about this place

-November 30, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “A single cloud blocks the radiance of the entire sun” –Thoureau

Good day today. Its actually gotten a little warmer out of late (still freezing but I hope -you are- warm. (hah Emily! Used that one correctly. Your probably very proud (hehe) ) Anyways I used it to get a good run in. Long under on tops and bottom, sweatpants, running shirt, jacket and winter cap…but I made it alright. It went really well too, I really turned myself loose as runs will be harder and harder to come by.

Nothing else to really report on. Worlds AIDS day is being revved up for. I am still impressed how much this particular disease gets the attention it does in Mongolia. Not in any way saying its not serious or something that does not deserve their attention, but despite being between two countries that have a high HIV rate especially by non-tourists who travel between them the amount of actual cases remains relatively low. I have no stats to back me up but just thinking about where we are I imagine more people get infected by the black plague than HIV each year in this country. Still, good to be progressive on this right?

Ill help out, in a rather disturbing way. I know that teens have sex a lot earlier in this country than others, but ive been asked to talk about HIV and condoms to ALL my classes….i teach 4th graders! They are 10!!!! Still, if I assess correctly they will be too young to even know that this is a sensitive subject to bring up and so will not snicker and whatnot when I discuss condoms.

Not feeling as hot as I would like of late. Think my high alcohol use last week and the communal living gave me the opportunity to catch a cold bug. No matter, im the walking wounded type. Toughening it out!!! I think ill make a grilled cheese sandwich tonight.

December 1, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Theme Song: “Bittersweet” –By Within Temptation

Today’s Quote: “Life is not a box of chocolates, or a bowl of cherries, or a cracked kaleidoscope, or a hill of beans, or a dime at a nickel slot machine, come to think of it life is not a stupid fucking metaphor!” –That’s from me.

A few months ago, just about at the end of the summer when I was typing up the blog entry for the Hovsgul Nuur trip I had a dream. I dreamt I hadn’t gone to Thailand. I stayed after I met her that summer and got a job out near Vanderbilt as a High School History teacher, and then moved to Chicago where she was pursing her doctorate and worked the most boring job alive as a Public School History Teacher. We were married, and had a kid.

I think she was pregnant again but not yet showing. We were living in an apartment just outside the city, one of those family friendly type setup places that new families move into and we were watching crappy television shows and eating Chinese food. It must have been one of those pregnancy food craving things. We argued about the name of the next kid, though I never recall us saying what the name of what our daughter was. Like all dreams specific things were hard to look at. I remember a bundle but never saw what she looked like. She had dark hair though I do remember that. The dream went on for so long, and absolutely nothing of interest happened in it. Housework and watching tv, picking up toys, things like that. It was like watching the life of the most boring people on the planet. I never even kissed her.

I woke up, and I found myself back in my action packed adventure life of Masters Degrees, Thai Kickboxing gyms, 108 year old Buddhist monk bracelets, New York dive bars, Peace Corps Service, living in a Ger on the other side of the world from where I had come from, German Beer Festivals, marathons, ultramarathons and horseback riding around 2% of the worlds fresh water and upcoming trips and adventures that served no other limit or master than my own ambition, and that has no end to it. I was back into a real life of freedom and limitlessness…and I sat up and began to cry. Its hard to cry out of context. I let it out, I bawled. I wanted to give it all back, and have just one more minute in a made up boring life I will never get with the woman I love. I didn’t have that dream again…I guess I am kind of thankful. Id be inducing sleep if I thought I could do that on a frequent basis.

I didn’t get to spend a boring life with the one I love, and instead I got to do and see things I never imagined existed and get to do until luck catches up to me, or I find another who I am willing to lie and say “I love you” to….and it never would have happened if the love of my life had not left me…you know I seriously promise you I am not a Buddhist but if I could have just five minutes of the Dali Lamas time I don’t expect an answer to fix or solve everything but I am really generally curious what he would say about my tale of woe. No doubt he would smile and ask me to talk to him again in ten years…as though my story were not unlike any other out there which I pretty much am certain of. I miss her. I miss her so much. To those who view love as I do we bedrock know that love conquers all. We also know that’s not a good thing…

Well, it’s been another year. Four years… don’t worry I wont repeat myself from last time. I haven’t gotten over her, and its clear to me that I wont. Its not the idea of her or of love, its not immortalizing love or any other argument people have given me about how to best treat my feelings for her so that I can just start dating again and not be alone as I am. No, in the end it just comes down to the idea that I am 29 years old and short of cancer, smoking/shooting/drinking myself to death or getting hit by a bus I have a long, long time left before I leave my woes behind me, and you cant cry your soul out. So you just carry it, and you come to terms with the idea that love may conquer all, but worse still is that life doesn’t require you to be with the one you love.

It doesn’t get easier…it just gets further away and publicly more pathetic to grieve. That’s another quote that I didn’t steal from anyone…. a good one too: “It doesn’t get easier, it gets further away and publically more pathetic to grieve.” I like that.

I can only imagine what she is like right now. Long married probably. Even pregnant or with children. I hope they get her beauty, and not her stubbornness. Wrapping up her doctorate…I know where she’s getting her doctorate but even after all this time I still wont confront her despite knowing where she is. I just can’t bring myself to do that. This is all long gone, and I know that, but in the great tragedy which is the two of us I simply wont have the final chapter me showing up to her University only to have her ask security to remove me from the campus or her husband try to punch me in the face. This story is already pathetic enough, and luckily to my knowledge the people suffering is just one-sided.

Was it a test? She stopped talking to me, not the other way around. No, it wasn’t a test, she just knew she was either going to disappoint her whole family or break one persons heart. She made a practical decision, and I guess she can seek solace in happiness with someone who forgave her for cheating on him with me.

More practically though, I learned something from Peace Corps Service about love.

Running from what you were or what you cant have wont make your feelings go away. You can cut yourself off, use the internet less than once a month, travel to the other side of the world, meet more people who have never heard of you, take up a job that passes the time and run till your absolutely certain there is no edge to this world and I promise you that if you truly do love someone you wont leave your feelings behind.

I love her more than you Mark and she loves me more too. Put aside logic, quantity of time and anything and everything else I promise I can tell you that to a moral certainty. If this ever gets back to you I don’t care how many children you have or how long you have been with her…I loved her more in the month I knew her than you will if you spend a lifetime with her and somehow I know that you know that too.

Don’t join the Peace Corps if your running from something. It wont help. You can give up everything you have and go absolutely anywhere, but your brain and heart are coming with you. I didn’t join the Peace Corps to do that, but i begin to see why they ask that as an interview question.

I am still free, free in a way that I never thought possible. That sudden truth you feel when you realize just how little you have holding yourself back from doing absolutely anything that you want to do is something else. I am in the Peace Corps because I want to be. After next summer….literally I have a million things I want to do, and I seriously could do absolutely any one of them. Nothing holds me, no one brings me home. Do I even have one anymore? Do I even need one?

I don’t want this anymore. I think in some ways I did before. My bouts of sadness and misery at least gave me proof that this was real. All those nights I drank myself into a coma or sitting in my mom’s basement punching a glass coffee table screaming “FUCK YOU!” That I wasn’t in love with the idea of something, and though this wasn’t a happy ending it was in fact real. Four years like this is too much. I don’t want to be miserable about this.

It took a long time but I finally reached it. I am not sad, not full of rage at myself and the world around me, not bottomed out with sorrow anymore. No, I am angry. I am angry at her, an emotion I refused to feel for so long but now I do. So now I can do something with that emotion to change.

I want what I see in almost every single person I have ever met who hit the same problem I have. I want the ability to simply ignore all my petty feelings in exchange for convenient ones. I want to burn away every single beautiful second I can remember with Rachel and replace it with the idea that a girl terrified about marrying someone she doesn’t even really love but is just expected to decided that if she ever WAS gonna bail it would have been this guy. I want her to be a stupid bad sushi and sake dream that goes away when I shake my head and gets replaced with some sex dream about college librarians and cheerleaders. It never works…

Shut up…shut up shut up SHUT UP! GET OUT! GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HEAD!!!

Ill live and be alone. Let me do that without bothering me. Is that too much to ask? I am okay with that. Hell I live on the other side of the world on my own in a tiny round tent where I don’t even have to use internet and I have enough alcohol to drink myself back into a coma if I so need to. Why do I have to feel this way every second of every day and just put on a face so I can still exist in society? Can’t I just actually be truly alone instead of always thinking of you?

I want to get over sadness like everyone else does by finding other happiness in the more enjoyable things in life and through it recognizing how little that person actually meant. I really really do want it to stop. I want to stop caring. I want to cry this conscience or soul or whatever the hell is the matter with me out and just stop caring.

No it’s the plot of “The Weatherman” in its own way. For better or for worse its over. Really really over. It may have been my fault, or it may have been her families, or her fiancé, or her friends, or she may even have been lying to me from the beginning hoping Thai women would do her dirty work for her but regardless who, how or even why, its over, really really over…and im not dead.

Life does go on…maybe that’s the greatest buzz kill out there to a hopeless romantic…You can live through pretty much anything…and life just keeps going on.

I still have one picture of her left on my computer. I probably should delete it.

Oh, one last thing and for the record I am stone sober writing this. Haven’t touched any alcohol all week. Not a drop since Thanksgiving. I wanted to see if it was making anything worse. It wasn’t. Besides…you cant buy alcohol in this country on the first day of the month!

December 2, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well…that will do nicely. So it was last night, and I had just finished writing that wonderful tale of woe that I did just above. I needed a bit of a pick me up and so I watched a new movie I had been given by a friend over Thanksgiving break. “Inception” I watched this and realized many things but the first thing I thought was “Well…that will do nicely.”

Its perfect, now I have something to vent into. Something to watch again and again without fail and I can start to write diagrams on papers and paste them all around my ger about how everything they did could actually work. There were several other levels of thought running through my brain as I watched that, the most prominent being “wow, if I smoked a LOTTT of pot I imagine that would either make sense or freak me out. Ive never done ANY pot and imagine that movie would be the reason to start. I get the feeling when im drunk and watching that it wont be nearly enough fun.

Great Sopranos like ending btw. The copout, the indecision, the “…well, if hes asleep some will be pissed and if he is not more will be of that too…OH WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT” ending. Bravo. Gotta hand it to Leonardo right? He makes a crap movie, and then follows right up with a kick ass one. Titanic/Man in the Iron Mask and so on. His last film before this had been his documentary “11th hour” and trust me it sucked every bit as much as this movie rocked. Fun fun! And you all got to talk about it with others when you were done seeing it too! Im stuck now for a while until I can find a community of people who can talk about dreams in dreams in dreams and so on. Oh I SOOOO want to find a Mongolian who speaks perfect English and have them watch this. Blood will shoot out their ears in no time flat! Fun fun fun!!!!

No but seriously I am pretty sure I can just start watching that night over night for the next six months and by the end of my term they will find me locked away in my ger naked with a gigantic beard and cords plugged into my head from the refrigerator and the oven screaming “I CAN WAKE UP NOW!!!!!” whee!!!

So as for today. Sarangoo has apparently run off to a computer seminar in the city. Even more amusing because she does not own a computer but seeing as she covered for me over Thanksgiving I wont give her a hard time that her classes got dropped on me for the next two days. Fun fun.

December 3, 2010. Bagakhagai, Mongolia.

I cant believe I have not written about this before, and so today I am going to talk about it a little. I would like it on the record that this counts as me saying something positive about the Mongolian school system that yes I do indeed bash on occasion…or three.

So this may not sound like something school gets credit for but bear with me and keep in mind how amazing this is. I am in a city of 3000 people. We eat the traditional Mongolian diet of endless amounts of meat and maybe just MAYBE a little more fruit than usual because we are on the rail line (or I just eat it all) in the winter there is almost noone outside who is not en route to somewhere and in this part of the town we lack the facilities for recreational sports on a widescale level.

Now for the amazing thing….noone in my town under the age of 30 is fat. Not one…not a single solitary fat kid. Not even like fat fat I mean they are all skin and bone. I didn’t realize how amazing that was until I stopped to think about it. Really??? Not 1!!!!!? As they become adults I can really only think of one guy who is actually fat either. (the chain smoking gym teacher!!!) Women…well yes they have a little more meat on their bones but not one of them I can think of would have a doctor telling them that they are overweight. Not one….not ONE!!!! How is that not blowing your mind? So why is this? All we eat is meat, we cant exercise outside for half the year…how the hell are kids not getting fat? This is not the sole reason but it helps. My kids do 30 minutes of aerobic exercise each day.

Not kidding, the minister of Education decreed that Mongolian students should engage in at least 30 minutes of active exercise a day, and as a result of the temperatures outside developed a cardio routine that we can do with students in classes and hallways. Can you imagine them trying to pull this off in the American school system. Better still, imagine it actually happened??? I don’t care what they put in the burgers in McDonalds. We (in Mongolia) eat more meat and fried potatoes than that guy from that documentary that was responsible for McDonalds shrinking its fries sizes (I know your for the liberal cause dude but dammit!!! Now I gotta go to 5guys for fries!!!) and we still are all in better shape than you sedentary Yanks. If Americans did what Mongolians did and still ate the same stuff…Oh good gods….waist sizes would plummet! But heres to the old Soviet setup of “boss says do it…okay no whining get in line!” type of work arrangement.

But…as I wouldn’t be me if I did not have something to complain about ill throw out this. Today was my first time teaching 9th grade. I haven’t been asked to teach with Sarangoo this class and today I found out why. There are only two students in 9th grade. Mustive been a low year for babies way back when huh? Well obviously you don’t need 2 teachers for this but as I was subbing for Sarangoo I figure no problem, just teach. I ask them for their textbook. They don’t have em. No problem again, not all students have this, and I can pull a lesson out of my ass as that’s what I usually have to do based on having no clue what is coming up next. Then I ask one of them for their dictionary. Don’t have that either…okay…that’s a little off. I mean by 9th grade this is the time in which they really should be getting their grammar down so they can pass their English grammar exams later. So at last I ask for the all knowing and having notebook for their English class…and the two students look at one another funny. Weve had a full quarter of school and you don’t have notebooks???? So…here is how I will react to this. Ill teach 9th grade any time they ask, much like I did today, I had them write verbs on the board. So long as im not accountable for the class ill not get involved. Peace Corps is an excellent place to come to grips with an unsufferable truth that there is just so much in even day to day life that is beyond our realm and control. Still…fun to teach 2 people only…no classroom management and a lot of individual attention.

But while were on classroom management I want to bring something up. Has anyone ever noticed that the concept of “classroom management” is really a late 19th/20th century invention? There has been education from the dawn of time in some form of another but with the implementation of public school systems and the removal of corporal punishment (both of which I overwhelmingly support) it has only been in the last 100 or so years that a teacher had to deal with pains in the assess. Before then…the kid got thrown out…or did not come at all! All those great Greek philosophers talking till they were blue in the face. Let them try even ONE of my pupils as a student and they wouldn’t get a single word in!!! Seriously think about that!

December 4, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I am sick. No fun. Good ole bug. Throat hurts, hypersensitivity and a runny nose. Too much booze last week and cold running I suppose. Looking over the Mongolia blogs of late everyone seems a little sick. Ah UB…the petrie dish of Mongolia! Nothing for it, it is what it is. Luckily I have always been the walking wounded type except when something knocks me on my ass. Then I need 2 days really in bed and im back without skipping a beat.

Still, I have chosen to spend some of the weekend in the school. I just came from there actually. Warmer and easier to maintain than my ger and it will give me a little internet as a pick me up. I am trying not to run again till this sick bout passes, but its only getting colder, windier and icier!

So, to aid in this recovery I have done something I have only done one other time since moving to Bagakhangai. You’d swear time had stopped in Mongolia as I did so too….i bought a drumstick of chicken. You see, my towns proximity to UB and railroad coupled with a winter so mild that even in December I am still wearing my fall jacket (that’s by far the most amazing thing I have written down so far!) our town has a few oranges and tomatoes for sale along with a meat that is not the animals of Monoglia (cow, sheep, goat, horse, camel) So with chicken/potatoes and carrots and spending a little time on the project I will be able to concoct some Chicken soup. I could even get some noodles and do chicken noodle soup! How cool would that be huh????? That and a liter of unpulped Orange Juice and I am pumping everything my body needs into it right?

Heres to my health!

December 5, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Most people in Peace Corps I know who live in soums love the sight of the moon. I don’t blame em, its something else. We live in towns without random lights scattered about and all that and so on cloudy or moonless nights you get a good grasp of just how dark this place gets! So when it’s a full moon and we live at a latitude where it looks like you could just grab the whole damn thing out of the sky it also lights up EVERYTHING. Its like a pale version of daytime…really! So that’s all well and good, but the time I like best is like tonight, when the moon is almost noon but the sky is clear….and the entire Universe does not seem all that far away at all! Next time I do Peace Corps in Mongolia I am going to bring a book on astrology. You can see absolutely EVERYTHING from up here…you really can.

I talked about this last summer, but it sorta slipped my notice when I was living in an apartment with windows I could not open. Every time I need to pee I go outside and look up…and suddenly whatever I was having to do a moment ago goes on the backburner…

Somethings a little strange though. Its getting warmer out. Were always below freezing but during the day its barely that and at night were barely hitting sub zero. Its December!!!! I should have trouble walking to the delguur let alone be able to linger and stare at the stars…

Damn this world rocks!

December 6, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

The best of news just arrived. My two life long friends, David and Martha. Who fell in love with one another the day they met (who I knew individually BEFORE they met one another), been together now for over 1/3 or their lifetimes and married with two children already have just told me that a third one is on the way. They are not even 28 yet and she has a masters degree, he has served in Iraq, and they are the happiest couple I know raising the salt of the earth in suburban Raleigh, North Carolina.

Those of my nature often bash the suburban lifestyle. We write it off as a haven that the scared masses feel safe in or a place lacking culture and excitement. Having been raised in the suburbs I can vouch that the suburbs are a wonderful place to grow up, but I am not sure if my adult years will keep me there. My friends however, they did not even dread it. They went all smiles and happy and their happiness is something I take great joy in myself. There my proof that when all the elements are right, love is truly a wonderful thing.

Naturally I expect the third born to be named either William or Josh (Jaina if a girl!)…and ill enter negotiations for it in the coming months, but for the time being…mazeltov you two!

December 7, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I read in the news today that right now the east coast is suffering from “arctic weather conditions” When I inspected the weather in New York I found that the temperature at night was 22 degrees Fahrenheit…hehehehHAHAHAHAHA….oh you absolute wimps!

Seriously? That’s all you got? Hell, this is probably the mildest December Mongolia has had in MY LIFETIME!!!!!!! and it is still sub-zero at night! I call wimps! WIMPS!!!!!

Now then, on to stuff about work. Nothing much to say, the “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” stuff is coming along. I can tell already that this will be one of those crowning moments of my Peace Corps service. It will become the viral video of the week on youtube and a thousand other ways that it will make me and my students famous without ever making any money. Very usual right!?

Better start cleaning up the ger. Peace Corps drops in for a site visit tomorrow and I want this one to go better than it did last year!

December 8. 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Site visit!!!! So I get my site area manager to finally make their way over here. My towns a little unique. I am technically part of UB but im not, and so if you’re a TEFL living outside UB but in the UB aimag (IE: ME) you get assigned to the Eastern sector (not central which does Tov Aimag which surrounds UB) We had a good laugh about all that for ten or so minutes as we went through the routine questions: You alive? You got coal? You drawn a face on a Tennis Ball and started calling him “Penn” yet? Sheep are still just livestock right? How many mistresses do you have? How big is the shitsicle in your outhouse? (hey, at least I haven’t taken a picture of it!)

I had nothing but good stuff to say and they seemed happy that I was doing alright in the ger. Every “challenge” I described has been done to death too. Like in my ger I can make either my space heater (on heating level 1)/my stove/my oven/my distiller/or my water boiler run but if more than one is running the circuit trips. Ive been doing this for around half a year now and gotten used to it but their response was that everyone has already complained about that. They also took away my non working smoke detector (that expired in 2002) And promised to bring me a new one or put it in my box.

They seem surprised by the lack of UB time I have. Apparently I am one of the first to live so close to UB and not go there every weekend or more. Nope, I like it here, and the ladies who live in the city that has a daily forecast of “smoke” must like the air quality.

So then we go to school and I get told if I give over 15000 tugriks ill get an antenna and my tv up and running. To be honest the only thing I want to watch is Russian ESPN (the biathlon should be running again) and I don’t think you can get that from an antenna, but yea ill get it. They said I was doing a great job and should continue on as is. I was in agreement. Worlds apart from last years site visit. As a soum liver much of my improvement to day to day life can be hard to demonstrate to the Peace Corps because when I do good work Peace Corps rarely hears about you at all. This I think was the first time in over a year I had demonstrated how much ive changed since I first got here. Oh the times…they are a changing…

Then the best part happened. I put down the suggestion that a TEFL volunteer from the next group should be placed both in Bagakhangai and Ondortolge. I figured an argument of some kind. Wanting only one teacher, something like that, and the only complaint I have about soum living is that you rarely have a site mate but that didn’t happen at all. They instantly agreed, and were thrilled that I was so happy here to recommend not only another volunteer but two. Outstanding! Really made the day great. Both towns got an application form and it means as I check out next summer another two will move in, and wild amusement will commence once again as 2 more noobs learn to speak Mongolian and feel the snot in their nose freeze.

December 10, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I made a movie with my students today. I am a very creative person, even without ego I can state that, but much of my creative thought is not that original. I watch tv, I read books and when parts of them are not up to my degree of coolness I modify them accordingly. What I did today with my students is an excellent example of this. I just got all the necessary video and photo footage of the 12 days of Christmas. Now comes the editing process. That’s going to tax my laptop, don’t fall apart on me now plz!!!!

That was so cool to make with the kids.

Were going to be famous on youtube I swear it!

December 11, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

That’s month 18 ladies and gentlemen. A year and a half of Peace Corps service and living on the other side of the world in a tent and on an abandoned Air Force Base. How very far ive come despite how little actually has happened. Life can be funny like that huh?

Got a phone call from Caitlin today. Had not heard from her in months not counting Thanksgiving and figure it was time to catch up and instead she just goes “im leaving”

Its strange but I totally get why there was no buildup. Just, “Hi Josh. Im leaving” It was the absolute LAST thing I saw coming and yet I didn’t do the dance of thinking I misunderstood that general statement and waste time going “wait, like leaving your site?”. I knew she meant it and that the girl with the other Tolkein Quote for a blog in Mongolia was packing up and moving out.

If you join the Peace Corps DO NOT become friends with me! Seriously everyone that I became best buds with of the M20 group has now left service. Its like the Defense Against the Dark Arts of Mongolian Peace Corps volunteer positions. She has her reasons, and like all who decide to bring their service to an end early we respect that, but when I put the phone down I wont lie that the first thing I thought was “dammit…now im gonna be bored for the last six months!” Selfish to the end huh?

She seemed quite chipper at being back to America for Christmas and missing the winter weather suddenly approaching (it is supposed to be -40C + F during the daytime for over a week) so I guess it just is what it is. Rob left, Matthew left, and even Caitlin left. Caitlin??? She was my best mate dammit. A geek like me but better at hiding it. An awesome cook, and the type of bud who would call you on your bullshit rather than let it slide. Good luck to you hot stuff! Go to bars and wear the Peace Corps pin and pull in all kinds of hot strange!!!

December 12, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

So, we get a raise. We used to make around 194,000 tugriks a month. Now we make close to 250,000 tugriks a month. HUGE bump in salary. Everyone is pretty damn stoked about it and I will say that even on my Spartan lifestyle the amount we were making was even taking me to the brink of my salary too. Very helpful, and it means I can buy slightly more luxurious things to eat like peppers and cherry tomatoes and the like. Fun.

There is a new factor that I imagine may draw some controversy, and I am oddly related to this too! To those that reside in Ulaanbaatar, an additional 50,000 tugriks will be granted as well. Now this is interesting because while UB is its own kind of expensive those living in Aimag centers of 20,000 people or more are still pretty damn cosmo and they don’t get any additional funds.

…now for the real kicker. Technically, I am in the UB aimag area…do I get a bump? I doubt they will, THAT would piss some people off for sure. I don’t really need a whole lot more money anyway, I just want it on the record that if I play semantics I should be getting that bump too!

December 13, 2010 Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Is it scary that I cry during the Christmas episode of “community”? Seriously that shouldn’t happen right? Damn overly sensitive mother who let me cry whenever I wanted to…does it suck even more that despite this if ever against even my own good judgement I have kids of my own I am gonna be the “Quit being a wussy!!!!” type dad. Sky father and Earth Mother please let me never have children. Now I know some may be thinking that’s a terrible thing to say but since the only people who read this knew me as a kid/teenager consider this. Imagine a kid like me again….okay got it? Now imagine instead of you as parents or siblings you have ME as the father???? Yea…not quite so cute and sweet now is it? Point made…

December 14, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Sarangoo once again delegated her shit work to me today. I rarely swear or am outwardly rude like this but I call this what it is. Its paperwork in a language noone can understand typing up unit and lesson plans that noone follows and checked by a boss who cant understand what I write. Shit work ladies and gentlemen. Shit work!

I remember all the bureaucracy I went through in my old jobs back in America. There was more paperwork but unlike here at least SOMEONE actually read the forms. I always thought that stuff was so useless but now I have lived and worked in a place where the paperwork is TRULY unread or used. I now understand the difference. We don’t change, and I hate bureaucracy. But when your delegated the task of writing up someone elses paperwork in a language they cant even read to be checked off so they continue to get paid….yea you gain a great understanding of how relative everything is.

So I did the work, only insulted her work ethic as she wouldn’t even sit and watch me do it so she could do so in the future. Government mule day… it is what it is. I could use a beer but I try not to drink except on weekends. Ill make the 12 days of Christmas movie as a pick me up. THAT’S why I joined the Peace Corps, not this fake paperwork garbage.

December 15, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Always something breaking out here. I mentioned before this country and its climate are not nice to electronics. Batteries drain, soot goes everywhere and things in general just break. I tried working on my “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” video and when I went to transfer from camera to computer it doesn’t work. It still runs and take pictures, but something doesn’t recognize anymore when I just plug straight to the computer. It could be any number of things, and Sarangoo will give me her transport thing so I eventually get the shots, but it really always is something around here isn’t it?

Now to change the subject. So, finished the bible today. Really I did. My sci fi books are in a lull until I get “Vortex” in the mail and a handful of pages here or there over the past few months and I finally got to the end of it.

First impressions…the bible starts off great. To be expected, its Torah. Strong opening, and a lot of the early books are history lessons. Occasionally a demon here or there gets thrown into what is more or less historically accurate and the read is pretty good. Then the bible really does become the Similarion. Its just…so….damn…dry. Not creatively written, no longer following the earlier history approach, and deities go 180 for no reason whatsoever. LOTS of contradictions, none of them properly explained…and its pretty much when one guy directs a movie series and then someone else makes the sequel (think Bryan Singer in X-Men 1 and 2 and then the dude who makes the Rush Hour movies got to direct the third piece of garbage X-Men movie!)

The ending tries to save it. All fire and brimstone… lots of descriptions about burning the world alive…armies of Magog…but the ending is still so anticlimactic. One of the good guys alone can wipe out the entire army of the evil ones and the army of good is supposed to be everyone in the good graces of God?????? If there’s no chance of losing this epic battle where’s the suspense???? Seriously guys, you had a huge meeting in Constantinople about which books to include and which ones not to. No individual book edits at all?????

Basically the bible is something that if your looking for answers you will find them, pretty much because it is vague and can be interpreted however you would like things to turn out. Case in point would be that yes indeed you can find plenty of verses to bash gays, and then a few books later you can find something that encourages you to support people in their own decision-making. Childishly simple, but it gets the job done of supplying answers. How we go about interpreting it and arguing about it with one another is a problem I reserve for our stupid ways, the majority of the book is stupid on its own accord. The opening few books are a GREAT read, but then the new authors just ramble on and on without any structure at all, and it comes to an ending that is impossibly one sided.

Summary: If your stuck in a ger for a year of your life…yea go ahead and fish this book out of the outhouse between UB and Bagakhangai and thumb through it. Otherwise….go read Dresden Files…that has way better shtick!

Now I need to find a Koran…

December 16, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

It was negative 47 C last night. Okay ill say it, THAT was cold. Ive broken out the winter jacket and in the morning I need to break up the ice in my water container so it doesn’t explode. I knew this was coming, just gotta take it. Good news is that the temp will drop back down to around -30 most of the time in the coming week. Scarf back on, ugly beanie hat and winter coat to school I go. The computer isn’t complaining about the weather too much though. I appreciate that.

December 17, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

Bored today while waiting for classes, so on a lark I started to look at UB through google maps…the result was rather amusing with what was and what was not on the map. Then I rolled it back two years to New York to see if some of the places and things were still there that I had been to before. Some are, The Kraine Theatre where I watched the New York Neo Futurists and Mamouns falafel place and all that, but something is not there anymore, and what took its place is quite comical. On the corner of 2nd Avenue and 4th street in Manhattan was a little bar that had the greatest name of all time. 2 by 4….Dive bar of all dive bars really. Blue Ribbons at your disposal, crappy pool table, Metallica and Guns and Roses non stop on the jukebox, the greatest place to spend 26-28 getting tanked. It had strip poles on the bar and for the longest while the bartender was this really funny 30 something former stripper who had the best relationship with me of “this is not a place for woes” this is where you drink yourself VERY happy. She danced on the bar rarely too…most of the time it was the odd drunk girl who usually fell off. I only made out once or twice there, this was NOT the place you went to get girls. The bartender had quite a laugh when the time it did happen the woman literally had to spin my chair around to get me to talk. Best of all it was cheap. Friday and Saturday from 9-midnight you could drink all the Budweiser you wanted for ten bucks. They made no profit off me other than tips!

So low and behold I found it had changed its name. Its now the Boiler Room. Actually the Boiler Room is a famous bar in NYC that had closed down from its previous spot and they had simply put it here instead as the owners of Boiler owned 2 by 4 as well….but now that means it’s a gay bar. A famous gay bar too! Still sounds like everything else looks close enough to the same….i guess I shouldn’t be so surprised. Its dead center East Village after all, it was just such a great dive place….no association whatsoever other than being cheap and gungy..my kind of bar…..ah well, as New York is best at demonstrating nothing ever lasts forever. Good memories of that place though, I sure as hell have that! I even met a gold painted smoking hottie bird that night from the Ukraine that night….wonder what happened to her.

…its Rachel’s birthday today.

December 18, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Wow, after all the -40 weather of the past few days now I feel as though I could sit around my get in my boxers. (ah heck, I do that anyway, OR LESS!) No but really at night its barely sub-zero and during the day the only thing that is annoying is the wind, but it is December after all!

Actually I even spent some time near sunset sitting outside. In the winter that is so hard to comfortably too. There was no wind and I just sat where you can see the nearby train station and the abandoned buildings the Soviets built to guard the place. I had just gotten to run for the first time in over a week and with the endorphins and my legs in the “feel good pain” mode I just started at the rusty old metal pieces around the beautiful Mongolian sun. Oh my my my it really is a beautiful world. I sat there and just let everything sink in, and I knew there was nowhere…NOWHERE I would rather have been.

Not going to UB this weekend, no point aside from buying olive oil and lettuce (I spoil myself this year really) and as nothing shuts down for the day of Christmas and the lovely UB ladies have arranged a Christmas party…well ill use next week for my monthly UB run. Gotta get this keyboard fixed too…or buy a garbage USB keyboard at least. I feel like this laptop of mine after 3 years of rigorous service is like the Millenium Falcon and each night I use it to edit movies that I make I whisper “hear me baby hold together”….please do..i don’t want the hassle of shipping in a new one from the states and 6 months in the winter is a little too long to go off the grid, especially when I will need a computer for job and future stuff…

Later night postscript: I just finished making the “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas and will be posting it on the blog and youtube tomorrow. I am rather proud of this. I do what I love and I love what I do. So many people “do what they have to so they can do the things you love” but I tell yea…I would…probably couldn’t do life any other way than this.

December 19, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I had forgotten about the wind. I recall it being tough all around, but in the summer nothing beats a 30 degree temperate day then a breeze on your face. Now the wind takes -10 F and makes it -40! Ive been in Bagakhangai for over three weeks now. Im not complaining really, it just means that I am aware that my clothes are not as clean as they could be, my hair is rougher that before (caked in dirt). Next Thursday I take a day or two off to go to UB for Christmas. Why not, ive covered for so many on so many occasions they can live without me for two days around here.

Changing the subject a little, my ger is hot tonight. I am sitting around in my underwear despite the -20 C temperature and the wind which has FINALLY died down. Heating a ger is tricky business, and requires practice, patience and blind dumb luck. I overdid it but by morning itll be cold cold…just as well though I needed my water bucket to like truly thaw out anyways. Im getting pretty good at it though, and ive come to bring to an end the neverending arument on the “newspaper on bottom and top or just on bottom” debate once and for all….

Hehehe…A 60 and 90 year old in Greensboro and their brother/son just all started laughing hysterically.

Long long ago, when dinosaurs roamed the Earth….and the Jacobs brood made fires in NC (needed about 5 times a year but routinely done in 60 F weather anyways) My father and Uncle no doubt invented this fake argument to get us kids in an uproar (or maybe just me as this sounds like something I would really be adamant about as a kid). So the argument was this….whats the best way to start a fire? Oh sure your start off with a bunch of light kindling, a few larger branches and topped off with the first dry log, but the newspaper…. Did: as my father and grandfather advocate that we put it both underneath AND above the metal bar thingy (wow ive forgotten what that is called) OR….as my Uncle Jonathan said that newspaper should only be found underneath the metal bar firewood thingy (I gotta google what that thing is called tomorrow)

Now naturally like all baseless, pointless and imaginary arguments the lines of the Jacobs household were drawn on this and for years we argued among one another to no effect. As both methods yielded fires I don’t think there was any quantitative data involved in this family debate. Except ONE time (when a ten or so year old weirdo kid made the fire btw) the upper and lower method failed and Uncle Jonathan really made sure we remembered that.

Well now I make a fire each night, and I am also the third prophet. For I have found the new way, the better way…the true way to get a fire going. Not top and bottom or just bottom….none.

How do you make a fire?

-You start with a household knife (like the one I bought a year ago when I moved here and I use it to cut bread as well)

-Then you get a hold of a log and you make slivers…really….REALLY skinny slivers. Watch your fingers!

-Then you make a LOT of them too.

-Then you set the newfound tiny kindling aside for a day or so to dry.

-You make a log cabin setup with the wood in your stove.

-You take huge chunks of coal and make a perimeter of the cabin.

-Then take tiny chunks of coal and scatter it close to the cabin and put a few final pieces on top (so it heats up the coal from the very beginning)

-Then with a single match, you set the cabin kindling on fire, and slowly add a few final chunks as enough embers form up.

-You let the coal run its course. You have made a fire using no newspaper whatsoever…

…and THAT is the secret to making fires!

The amazing thing is that you don’t even need a lot of kindling either. Ive been in town for a month or so and I am still on a single log piece of kindling. So long as you make a fire within 24 hours of the last one there will still be burning embers under the ash of the old fire. All it needs then is to be replenished with more coal with a few puffs of wind and your good to go.

I bet you three thought I forgot that little argument of ours didn’t you???

Postscript: GRATE!!!!! That’s what that metal thing is called… internet rocks! My apologies….i don’t have one of those either. Just a rectangle to hold coal and ash!

December 20, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Hulu is such a wonderful thing. I watched an episode of Law and Order SVU. I have such the hots for Mariska Hargitay. Her shorter hair days were better though. Actually I sorta got a thing for any women cops (don’t read into that too much) anyways this SVU episode was about alcohol abuse on college campuses and rape. It was strange to see a drama of this because this was what I dealt with for the longest while.

All things I worked on while I was there about were confidential so obviously I wont go into detail, but as a Resident Director of over three years I was a counselor on some VERY high level judicial councils of sexual assault. Its not pretty, not at all as much fun to watch on TV, and worst of all very very real. Actually I know what was the worst part of it. The worst was that unlike on SVU…you DON’T know everything. You don’t know who really is a victim and who isn’t at the end of 40 minutes. Its ten different peoples stories, all differning in “certain facts” and make up a story that turns everyone into a victim or a fiend depending on who you talk too.

Worse still is I don’t have an answer, or rather my answers don’t work. For instance, I didn’t drink until I was 22, and I stayed out of college bars even after that…you can guess why that’s not something easy to sell to others. I still am not so sure what caused such a good streak in me. Not religious, parents both drink (not a lot but you get the idea) and I do indeed like the taste of the stuff and drink it a lot now too…I guess it boiled down to me having parents who taught me to respect law and authority (go Mom and Dad! Eric your in there too!)

Back to the episode though, the thing to take away from this is simple: this goes out to EVERY guy plain and simple. If she is drunk, or acting like shes euphorically happy or anything that you would lead you to believe she cant tightrope walk….she is NOT giving you consent!!!! I don’t care if she mounts you through slurred speech or not! I don’t care if your BAC is flammable. Keep it in your pants and see if she feels the same way in the morning! If she is drunk she CANNOT give you consent. There is no wiggle room here or anything to figure out. Its strange, in a country with as much alcohol as this I don’t know what the rates of charged rapes are. Probably lower, given the liberal and early consumption of alcohol, young marrying age and lack of University scene outside of three cities in this country…that might be something to investigate.

December 21, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia

Over the weekend I was putting the final touches on the “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” song. In doing so I had used clips of a movie called “Wallace and Gromit: A Close Shave” I don’t know if she remembers it but back when I must have been a teenager this 40 minute movie came out in very artsy select movie theatres, one of which was in Washington DC. My mom took me to see it. I know I told her how much I loved the movie and I still do, but I don’t think I ever told her how grateful I was that she came along with me as well.

That’s what happens as you age I suppose. You finally get enough experiences behind you that you start to feel happy about the times you spent with the people you love. Thanks mom…we must be near Christmas, im all nostalgic on my blogs!

I hate Tuesdays, I dunno why but this place really becomes a madhouse, and I am only here for one class in the afternoon so im in a small room with about 20 teachers all yammering and cramming food down their throats and one of the Mongolian Language teachers has spent the last two months try to cough out her lung, very unsuccessfully I might add. In essence its just a pressure cooker of irritation, and it has been a month without pause.

They want me to stay for Christmas Eve for a party. I had to politely refuse. Peace Corps is doing its own shindig and I have been in town now for over a month. A hot shower, good beer, pizza and people who I can talk about the plot of “Inception” in detail with is going to be how I spend Christmas Eve. Besides, noone in my town is Christian anyway and neither am i…in essence it would just be an excuse to drink excessively…and I do that more than enough already and I do it better alone.

Worry not, I told them I would be here for the New Years Eve party. Thatll be…well…drunk seems like the adjective to describe that. Were nearing the end of 2010 huh??? A full year in another country….and an exotic one at that. Pretty damn cool. Hell im 30 in 2 months…and about 3 or so months after that Peace Corps service comes to an end….seriously??? December 31st ill do a bit of a reflection blog entry I imagine.

Postscript: I just looked at the weather and it seems tomorrow its going to be sunny and -40 (F and C are the same at that temp) even during the day. Seeing as I have only one class on Wednesday I think ill make arrangements for an early UB trip. I need to get this keyboard fixed anyways. Good news is that the cold at that temp appears to be a passing thing. We still have barely any snow on the ground. I love the look of Mongolia this winter. Cold and crisp but not all one singular white color. So different, so beautiful.

December 22, 2010. Bagakhangai in the bus on the road to UB, Mongolia.

Last night I treated myself to a winter solstice feast. Four beers and the rest of my noodles and pasta sauce. I even timed it so I used all of the remaining water in my ger so there is nothing to freeze in the coming days when I am not here. I have learned the true gift of a ger dweller to actually time my water consumption. The eclipse was nice enough. Land of the Blue Sky sure pays off at times. I like Solstice for some reason, probably stemming from how so many religions have made a deal about it yet it actually has a physical characteristic to all of them. It is the darkest… that’s something to keep in mind.

I think there is something to realize about this. Yes it will get colder in January and even February, but as of today we come closer and closer to the utopia which is the summer. The days will grow longer, and the yearning to run will grow stronger. Food will grow in the ground once again and day by day we creep back to our blossoming.

I think in the past week or so I have become acutely aware of how cold and dark its been. Ive tried to stay in good spirits but I know what it is, its winter in a country where I sleep in a tent. Its not a complaint, just knowledge that this is what it is. I am not weary yet, but I am glad that this is as far into the woods as I walk, every step from this and each day that passes now brings me out, and it even means the ending of my time in the Peace Corps. Not a euphoria, just a reminder that even exiles must eventually come to an end.

Life is a funny thing is it not?

December 24, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

I got to see Harry Potter 7 in the theatre yesterday after getting my computer fixed. Okay movie, but now that all movies are in 3-D they are making too many shots where something is supposed to be jumping at the screen. Its distracting and unnecessary.

Ah well…the movie itself…yea okay better. Darker that’s for damn sure. It seemed like we jumped a little too dark from the Harry Potter 6. My favorite part was something that did not even actually happen. Its where Hermoine and Harry are dancing. That was great. I don’t know why I liked it so much, but it sorta showed how when things are REALLY REALLY bad you can still find something so simple to be happy.

As I watched it in a theatre full of Mongolians I did notice that all of the camping scenes really look like they shot the movie in Mongolia. Or maybe ive just been here so long that everything looks like Mongolia to me.

So with that done I went to AB&F and proceeded to drink my weight in good beer. Ah beer….i love that beer is so often associated with someone who has bad drinking taste and when I do it here its miles better than anything drink during the other 99% of my time. Bumped into some fellow PCV’s as well….based on what I remember I didn’t act any stupider then I usually do…so that’s good right?

December 25, 2010. UB, Mongolia.

Christmas was going out to eat Chinese food and then to a comfortable bar where we drank half liter beers costing about $1.50 each. It was warm, full bellied and in the company of good friends and people who were as happy to be there if you were. I could go into specifics…but really how is that not the ideal day?

Life is good…really really good.

December 26, 2010. Bus back to Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

The cold is back, and Im not nearly bundled up. I am waiting for the food vendors who actually have tsuivan to walk by. All the ladies that have passed so far only have Buuz…in all fairness Buzz are WAY more popular than tsuivan…but its my favorite food. I have two packages this time and though I brought my large bag I am really holding onto a whole lot of stuff. Itll get better tonight when I am in my ger and I have a fire going, but right now it is all a little much, and though not hungover I am well aware I was drinking last night.

Toughen up soldier! City life has made me soft.

December 27, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I have to surrender my oven tomorrow. I still cry foul, and I will deny them my oven when I leave and give it to one at a similar soum nearby UB. Foul! Foul indeed! No more pizza for them…EVER!!!

Shuffled out after classes ended to go buy some water. 70 liters of water to gather in sub zero temps….again the wind is BRUTAL! Luckily that amount should tide me over for 3 weeks when I leave for 2nd quarter break. I either will just chill in UB and get my Chinese visa for March OR ill go on an eagle hunt. The eagle hunt is expensive…perhaps too expensive.

Hang on…lets do the math here. 70 liters of water divided by 21 days….even if you throw in the odd liter and a half I buy from the delguur during the day and I would say im still just around 4 liters of water a day in consumption. Drinking, cooking, cleaning, four liters total….i don’t think you could shower in America and use less than that alone! I don’t care if I take over a sewage plant when I finish Peace Corps…I have the carbon imprint of a horse out here!

December 28, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “On the darkest night, the stars shine their brightest”

Well, that’s about another month I guess its best to put this up on the blog. In review what is there to say about December? December in Peace Corps is hard, especially if you live in a country that does not even really recognize the holiday. December is when it may not even necessarily get depressing, but sure gets dark. Dark in a country without lights on outside at night. Its cold and your first whiff of whats to come in that capacity, and if your heart is not in it its depressing, and if your heart is in it you still know your in for one hell of a ride.

It’s the time that you just got done having a good time seeing friends at Thanksgiving and you then slowly realize that you are bummed you missed that in America, and then a month from then Christmas is a holiday you realize you will miss as well. It’s a time when every kids ABBA soaked ringtone of “Happy New Year” is like Chinese water torture, and you can’t tell if you just want the noise to stop or be a different kind of noise at all.

It’s also the heart of the 2nd quarter of school. As a student and teacher in American school before coming here AND then teaching in Mongolia it seems the same. The 2nd quarter is the toughest. The shine of the beginning has worn off, everyones a little grouchier, and the summer looks far far away. It’s the time that even those who are truly all around happy can look bummed. The third and fourth quarter are both a week less in length than the first too and the 3rd quarter break lasts 2 weeks…we have not had an official break since the 2nd week of November. It’s still in the middle of an ever so long quarter.

In conclusion, its not always darkest before the dawn. Actually it never is….its darkest halfway through, and its during that time you need to realize that every further step you are taking is not INTO the woods, but out of it. That as cold and hard as life is now every step afterwards brings warmer and longer days, and the joys of rolling green hills and the endless smell of animal droppings that you miss the smell of in the winter as everything is frozen. In essence, I have reached the mid way point of the 2nd half of my Peace Corps years, and while I don’t despair or feel stressed I am going to enjoy how each day after is one towards a brighter, warmer future.

Life is good…and here is to even better days.

Okay. Now for the past few months i have settled into a routine of posting a writing blog near the end of the month and a scattering of photos at the middle. But today when i was looking up when "Harry Potter 7" would be in theatres in UB i saw that this movie was out. A quick youtube hunt brought me the trailer. Seriously....you remade THIS movie. Oh Mama Mia indeed!

I even know where they shot it too. We dont exactly have an ocean around here so they settled on Terelj from the look of it. Wild fun. I know you guys dont speak Mongolian, but the part where all three men (one country, one cosmo, one sorta all around normal) go up to the girl and go "Bee AVVVCH!" Thats them all going "im your father"

Cant wait to see Mongolian take on "Flash Gordon" or "West Side Story" ....actually please dont do that last one!

November 1, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “A Writer?!?! Why on earth do you want to be a writer? Your not oppressed your not gay!!!” –The Dude who was the serial killer in the 4th season of Dexter (he said it in a movie called “Orange County” and the show “3rd Rock From the Sun”…ive obviously forgotten his name)

Bombs are gone. Last night they were just sitting their collecting more rust like they had for the past two months. I woke up to go to the bathroom and I didn’t notice the missing bombs right away. I noticed that the yard seemed a little…clean. As if they had pulled some of the long grass and removed the odd nut and screw scattered around the mechanical yard. Then I looked at the spot where the bombs should have been…not there.

Bummer…I liked them. They gave the area a sense of…childish excitement. This “fall cleaning” is likely a sign that soon the Peace Corps will be dropping in to do the annual “So how does it look now?” inspection in which we go through the motion of having someone from Peace Corps make sure everything I need is here and if there is anything I have had a hard time relaying to my community to clear that up. Guess they want them to think I got a nice clean yard. Not like I have a whole lot to say against my community. This place is a Peace Corps Volunteer dream come true. Small, gers, but still internet and beans. I have the best of so many worlds and though my counterparts may not be falling over one another to learn new teaching styles based on some of the other stories of volunteers ten times better than me who had to quit because of how bad they got along with their counterparts things could be SO…SO much worse.

If I really was looking to complain about something…hmm. This year im alone here. The UB crew are pretty tightly knit, and as I only go to UB once a weekend a month or so its not like I have any of them on speed dial. My town is ideally suited for two TEFL’s, and I will be sure to tell them that when my time here comes to a close. Instead im just an oddly placed Teacher Trainer with a bunch of mildly successful projects and plenty of teaching work. I learned a long time ago not to delude myself that what I was doing out here was a game changer, I learned to realize that through a very very passive way I have made a subtle and yet significant change to a small little town that would never have had this kind of experience otherwise, and I think two years out here is definitely giving me the privacy and time I needed to work through some issues I keep to myself. Exile is not always a bad thing I suppose…

In all honesty of late ive felt rather estranged from my haasha family of late. Not angry, just as though they have resigned to leave me alone. Still, I get to interact with them way more than I did with my neighbors when I lived in the apartment, so alls well.

Last full week of the first quarter of school. Fun fun! Pardon me now, I got eleven or so teachers who all found out I have the ability to make pizza and suddenly they are all flocking to my tiny little ger to eat…fun fun!

November 2, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Ive seen and heard some pretty fracked up stuff in my time in Peace Corps, but tonight…what I heard….well it took the cake. It trumped anything else. Even more than when I watched from a balcony as a drunken man beat his wife and chased his daughter in a drunken haze into the countryside. Tonight my haasha father euthanized another round of puppies, and it was not fast and based on the noise NOT merciful.

The circle of life, it is what it is, if not him then the slow decay of winter, what is a flower and what is a weed, the gardeners choice. The list of metaphors goes on but as liberal as I may be I have far too often come across one undeniable and fundamental fact about life. Existence is here because of its willingness to kill others to continue to exist. Life is struggle and is red in both tooth and claw.

Some are bigger, some are stronger, and no matter how many committees or support groups we set up the world bows to this one undeniable fact. What I heard, it wasn’t even the sound of torture, it was the sound of people being very aware they were doing something that if they talked about it long enough they would convince themselves that it was wrong and that is should not be done or at the very least that THEY didn’t want to be the one to do it. That’s why it happened fast, the way warfare and mass murders happens fast. It needs to be done as soon as we can, before we talk ourselves out of it. That was….well…just nothing for it that was me cowering in my ger while something utterly awful happened that I was powerless to stop. I hate that feeling, because I am pretty sure it means that I acknowledge the truth of the longest fang always winning.

I guess the only time I will ever find out is if my own life is on the line. What a depressing and terrifying thought that is as well.

November 3, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Saw online the election results of America. My lack of proximity to the states has blissfully kept me away from the neurosis that can build from being around such political hubbub but it sounded like the election results were much what I predicted. The pendulum continues to swing, as 2006/08 were the liberals time to regain their strength, and now as they sit on the high horse the conservatives get to bite back now. On and on it goes. Ah well, ill be back for the 2012 presidential race unless I enlist again. That will be fun. I hope it’s the American version of the Le Pen situation in France where a hyper conservative gets the Rep nod and so the primary election is a blowout…I guess we just have to watch and see…

November 4, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Moogi called me and basically told me to do her English paperwork for her. Again id complain about this but its not worth it. Im not exactly pressed for time out here and its not like its hard to do either. I am pretty sure I could type up a page from War and Peace and turn it in and noone would bat an eye.

I don’t like it, but like I said I have expanded my range of temperance to the idea of fake cheating bureaucracy….go me!

I found out something rather amazing today by the way. Now one thing that occasionally happens among PCV’s is we compare and contrast countries. Sometimes its all in good fun, but occasionally those in slightly more rustic conditions claim themselves as a tad more “hard core Peace Corps” Though rather rustic I think anyone who volunteers for Peace Corps is pretty badass period, though the saying during tough times in other Peace Corps countries is “At least were not in Mongolia” I figured we were paid pretty low, but I mean common, its not THAT bad right? That’s the cool thing I found out today, putting aside climate and lifestyle and all the other hard stuff we do out here in Mongolia, we also live off almost the least amount of money. Theres only one other country that the volunteers get less money than we do. Your not going to believe it, but its Jamaica! And they get other fringe benefits in Jamaica…you know what im talking about right??? That thing…im sure Bob Marley was a fan of this.

That feeling they get from something that comes from their country among many others but not Mongolia….that mellow feeling of it rising and falling ever so gently…over…and over….and over…and over…again. Its like waves crashing down on them…again….and again…and again…it must be sheer bliss…

…

…

…

IM TALKING ABOUT AN OCEAN PEOPLE!!!!!

(sorry…just had to do that! Go California for not legalizing mowie wowie!!!)

…

but wow….we beat all of Africa for cheapest amount to live off of? I mean I know it’s a Spartan lifestyle around here even for me…but…Wow….

We are trying to get a raise of living salary which is looking quite possible, which we do by calculating what we spend on things each month and then submitting a form. I got chewed out…wait for it…because I spent less than the amount Peace Corps gives me! I estimate around 80 or so percent of us out here monthly dip into American savings to keep their heads above water. I did that over the summer myself too to pay for my vacation. The summer I was far more prone to drinking, especially because there was a smoking hottie from Hong Kong who kept me company in beer tents over the summer too. Now I usually only drink on the weekends and it’s the $3 liter bottle of vodka. What can I say….i can slum! I guess if you don’t drink a lot or drink something that’s the staple of a country you really can live off pennies around here.

November 5, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Esthers famous! Shes been back in Hong Kong all of two or so weeks and already she has her photos published in a travel book. Great shots too…some of which are even on my computer because she used it to move photos to a DVD. Go her, go her indeed. If she indeed gets her book published I am gonna be sure to ask for her publisher for my own book. “Three Shots of Vodka: An American Teacher’s Experience in Peace Corps Mongolia” Emily if your willing to correct my spelling ill let you be my manager for 10% straight off the top.

Anyways…when it starts to get cold out in a country where you are not near heaters or even buildings you tend to spend the overwhelming majority of your time with your clothes on. I am not a clothings person…not a nudist, but I am not prone to wearing layers unless I absolutely have to and a shirtless lounge is find by me. Its not that cold out yet, heck I don’t even have wood or coal of my own yet (im told coming next week) but it is the month of November in a country where the snow falls and stays in September and it was not until last night that I saw myself in the mirror with my shirt off.

Maybe I have just been running a lot without drinking a lot or maybe it has to do with the constant shivering burning calories….but wow ive lost some weight. More then that though im seeing my abs again. I mean they have been around for the last five years, but never standing out. They just looked like a guy who ran a lot and didn’t have enough money to eat. Last night…well I had my first vain moment in a long long while. I am looking good! Could I be one of those annoying people who actually looks BETTER as their chiseled 30’s approach than their impish 20’s?

Nah, its just been a while since I had a prolongued period of beer drinking and pizza eating in UB. A few full good meals will fatten me back up. When the real cold actually shows up im sure my running will not be everyday either. Still, I could be uglier…im smelly that’s for damn sure, but not entirely ugly…go me!

November 6, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia

Just a day trip, that’s all…just run in, grab the packages from my father and stepfather and run right back out. I hadn’t been to UB in a while, I guess that explains my naivety.

It snowed last night. First snowfall. Its not really all that cold yet, especially compared to last November, and the snow was moist in nature instead of the bristling stuff that fell for the majority of last year. This stuff made the road into UB a sheet of ice. Lotta overturned trucks on the side of the road and whatnot. Very grisly! It took us six hours to travel into UB. By the time I reached the city we passed the daily meeker already heading back to town. I guess I am glad I did this on Saturday instead of Sunday huh? No worries…ill just park it for the night and head back tomorrow. The city is getting ready for the cold, I can tell. Already foot traffic is down and the guesthouse is not stuffed to the rafters like it was in the summer. Theres a handful of 21’s here who are here for various medical things. I am glad I got to chatter with them. Good life good life….

November 7, 2010. The bus back to Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well a rather fine evening last night. I got to meet quite a few fellow M21’s who I sort of invited myself over for dinner at an Indian restaurant. Im sure that was semi-impolite but I think I was accepted in well enough. I got the packages which I cannot wait to get back to site to open. The next chapter of the Harry Dresden awaits me. From what I gather from the jacket of the previous book this ones quite the adventure!

The road is all icy again, and im not sure if it will get warm enough even with the sun to melt it off before more snow and cold arrive. Winter is creeping its way here. No worry, I had a really good summer/fall. Schools out for 2 weeks as of Thursday too so I imagine ill eventually make my way back into UB in the next week or so. Get some more good meals in me. I am a little more skinny than I expected. To come to UB I dug out my “bad” jeans. The ones that got torn and semi fixed last year at Swearing in. Have a lot of good memories in those jeans, but im afraid that this last great adventure in Mongolia will be their last before age collects its due on them.q They are size 30 waist and when I put them on I need my belt to keep them from sagging. Almost 30 and im still a size 30….havent let myself go yet!

For some reason im feeling rather nostalgic today, and I flash back to last January, when I was pushing this very bus through the snow in the middle of nowhere in sub zero temperatures and without gloves. What an amazing life this is huh???...

November 8, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia

I just read “Changes” by Jim Burton….well that fracking sucks. Epic to be sure, and now that I think about it all of 1 of 10 people I know read this book who also read this blog but what happened….the way the war ended. Dammit…really, really dammit.

Starting to get cold to the point that I cant just wait for my fuel to show up. Think I am going to have to kick some ass to get wood and coal that’s mine delivered to my place. For all the times the community has asked me if I am cold youd think it would have manifested into a pile of fuel in July or something, but yea, even for a mild season so far November at night is cold!

My counterpart overslept today…boss got a little angry at her. I cant tell for sure why but my counterpart has been a tad off her game the last week or so. I imagine she may just need a nice week off school like I do.

November 9, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Still no wood or coal. They have until tomorrow…then I get Peace Corps involved. I like to pride myself on my ability to live off and in just about anything, but this is no longer a comfort issue. This is me needing to actually not shiver myself through the night.

Were giving tests to all the kids grades. Kinda ridiculous given everyones guaranteed to pass…but eh whatcha gonna do huh?

November 10, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I miscalculated. I thought school closed after today, and it turns out it happened yesterday. Well that’s all well and good I suppose. It gives me another excuse to go into UB this weekend to fatten up and to see if the package from my mother came in. I would put off going for another week, but in two more weeks it will be the Thanksgiving holiday and I like to space out my UB runs if I can help it.

I think we resolved the wood/coal problem. I thought that I had been leeching my familys coal, it turns out that they are leeching MY coal. Well seeing as I occasionally had leeched their bark chips about 5 times since I moved in we will call ourselves square. They seem to want me to buy wood from someone in my community who sells it, but im in talks to see that resolved too. Peace Corps is supposed to be paying for all this and If that’s the case then they will give me money for that, but I sort of doubt it. I should be afforded my own wood pile. Well, im in UB for the next weekend so it doesn’t matter all that much.

Snow is about to pick up more. Were well overdue anyway. Time for the hard months. Today as I had time to spare I played around with a search engine I had not used in a LONG long time. Im reconsidering my thought of flying out West to go on an Eagle hunt in January….do I REALLY want to spend my vacation being colder than usual playing with birds in search of animals we rarely catch? More on that later.

Ill go to UB tomorrow….mmmmm….pizza. The good stuff too….

November 11, 2010. On the train to Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

17 months of Peace Corps service. G….M….CHRYSLER!!!! Wow…that’s impressive accidently no less! Spending it using the train for the first time even in my Peace Corps service to get to UB. Had to get my ass up at the crack of dawn to do it too…bleh…

So I found out yesterday I did not get selected to be a trainer for the IST. Okay, so im angry but atm I am REALLY trying not to do as I have done in the past when I get passed up for something I think I am the most qualified for. That goes nowhere as I learned from the past and just leaves a bad taste in my mouth and those I was trying to impress even less thrilled about me. I will however stress the reason I got for me not being a IST trainer was not in good taste whatsoever. I was declared something that is not true and…wow im a little curious just how much I openly want to write down about what was said, and the reading between the lines of what they told me that really makes me want to get angry over this too.

They did something I wouldn’t have done. Some of the higher ups around here I don’t think take me very seriously. Maybe that was even my fault from times past….but that’s just…nope…not getting angry. I need a pizza before I write and post anything else.

))…three or so hours later…((

…okay, yea I am glad I ate something. I got into UB, with a head full of steam and I ordered myself to sit down at Nayras and not to stop eating until I had some emotion running around in me other than anger. I ate 2 12-inch pizzas and a Cheese and tomato sandwich… I had no idea at all that I was so hungry. It was that kind of hunger you get where you don’t even feel the food going into you for the first ten or so bites. The woman gave me my first pizza and I had eaten it by the time she had returned a minute later with the silverware and I was ordering another pizza to go with it.

After another pizza and a sandwich that went a little slower I instantly started feeling better. My anger was no longer something that I just wanted to use to piss and moan about. With my astronomical hunger sated I found myself still angry, but at least now I was able to turn my anger into something more productive.

So, their decision not to use me as an instructor has changed some things for me. At this point, I am out of opportunities to demonstrate that my initial whining about my site and team player lacking skills (from 15 months ago) are simply not going to be forgotten no matter how ideal of a Peace Corps volunteer I am now nor how many successful secondary projects I perform. There’s simply nothing for it, I cant make those that knew me a year and a half ago forget, and I have no way to get back in good favor. Therefore I think I can rule out two potential futures I had been considering for the following summer.

I will not be a third year Peace Corps volunteer and I am also not going to apply to be a Peace Corps Volunteer Leader at least not for Mongolia.

November 12, 2010. UB Guesthouse, Mongolia.

Well, that was a good evening. We are linked to food, some more than others I am sure but when your hungry everything in the world sucks. Get a pizza in your gut and a beer in your hand and the whole world suddenly feels like a heavenly place.

Well without anyone around I am uncertain really how to spend my time other than eating and drinking. Not like that is a particularly bad thing, but you get my point right?

I got a text message from Sarangoo today. My principal and technically a supervisor called her to ask if they could move me into an apartment. They seem unsatisfied that I want to live in a tent and insist I move into an apartment with hot water and creature comforts. I turned them down, but they were being rather insistent. I hope they think im weird and not actually crazy. I wanted it, now im gonna get it!

November 13, 2010. Nayras Cafe, Mongolia.

Saturday. Ive done all my UB chores of late and I find myself already missing my site. I got an appointment to talk to our Country Director on Monday afternoon. I need to ask her for some raw data so I can get this documentary project off the ground. That coupled with the fact that the bus does not leave for my town on Tuesday means that I will be in this town until Wednesday. Im not missing any work and most people in my town who work for the school left the minute school ended, I just sort of miss the simple life I have there.

Ill be fine, its just now that ive had a monthly dose of good food I sort of find myself awkwardly comfortable. The idea I not only showered but I did so repetitively over the past few days, and each time I take one I lose that sensation I had the first time. I dunno but when you start to realize just how little you need to be happy when you find yourself with so much more it can feel unnatural. That I spent a month without a hot water shower and now I need to take one each day… I am trying to describe this without bringing up any Buddhist philosophy I usually use but its hard to do.

Ugh…even comfortable I complain. Im fine. I think I miss running some. Ill survive a few days more of luxury!

November 14, 2010. Nayras Café, Mongolia

Question…is it a beer with breakfast if your breakfast is pizza? In all the times ive eaten at Nayras café (PC Mongolias second headquarters) I have never drank a beer here. This morning after staying in at the guesthouse I guess I just was not feeling particularly conservative and I ordered a Budweiser to go with my breakfast of pizza. Ah…the finer things in life.

I miss Bagakhangai.

November 16, 2010. UB Guesthouse, Mongolia.

Good gods this year is spoiling me rotten. Almost no snow yet, its barely freezing during the day and the bright beautiful sky continues to shine. I love it. Even UB can occasionally look nice in weather like this.

Went to Peace Corps office today to get some flu shots and went on a fact finding mission involving some questions I got to ask the Country Director. I got pointed in the right direction about a lot of it too.

Tomorrow I get to say goodbye to UB for my town once again…ah! Ger sweet ger…and the whole back to work thing the following week. Granted I have to come back next weekend but seeing as that is for Thanksgiving I think I could stomach UB one more weekend. Besides, after that I am well aware that the cold will indeed be coming and that means if I so choose I can stay in Bagakhangai until the cows come home (which in my town is around 3:30pm each day) Horray!

November 18, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Hot Damn its good to be back. I could tell my spirits were lifting the minute I woke up yesterday thinking it was time to head back into town. I threw everything together, put on newly snug pants thanks to the excessive amounts of beer and pizza I have been eating for the last week or so and got set to move out. I put myself down for a bed the following week during the time of Thanksgiving as well. One might think returning so soon would bum me out, but you got to take into account that over 100 volunteers are converging on the capitol for this and UB guesthouse is one of the cheapest and best ones for us to. That place will be all volunteers. Horray again!

Heading back was a snap this time, largely because I did not have any liquids this morning. You see, I am one of these people who will drink over 5 liters of water a day if I have the choice. Now having a healthy body also means that stuff just glides right through me and as a result I pee a lot. In the world of plumbing I call America this has never been a problem, but now I live in the world of outhouses, and a high traffic area like the black markets outhouses are not a place to visit.

Its gotten pretty bad before. You cant be the only foreigner in a bus and be the one who asks em to stop once we hit the countryside so I can pee either. The embarrassment would be overwhelming!. So instead I just sit there, thinking of how to explain to my medical officer why I now need two new kidneys because my own have burst. Anyways, this time I didn’t need to pee, and the whole trip felt a lot more pleasant.

Theres snow on the UB mountains but as of now my town STILL does not have snow on the ground. Its past the midway mark of November. The snow is over two months late here it is so disgustingly beautiful outside for the month its not even funny. Im obviously savoring it. And so we drove an hour or so southeast, the snow on the grounds disappearing little by little. Cattle still roam the countryside, trying to get some free final calories in the animals before the snow buries their food. If the animals could take a blow like last winter and live I am pretty sure they could survive this milder one too (btw: they STILL say this winter will be as tough too)

We pull into town and life felt like time was slowing down. I got out and didn’t instantly need to guard my stuff, I didn’t need to worry about buses and taxis (though if I can help it I will never use a taxi again) I had so little left to bother me. I took a deep clean breath of air and thought ahead to my ger…and then started walking.

Ah, my ger. Had to have a txt message war to keep it over the break too! I get back and the final liter of water in my water container is frozen over. My sinkwaste water has frozen solid as well. No dead mice like last time, I guess they realized without me here to heat the place its not inhabitable. The sliver of bread I left behind was hard enough to snap the table if I brought it down hard enough. I had just put my stuff down and thought of all the chores I had to do to get this place livable again. Sky Father dammit its good to be back!

So yea, a couple hours of work followed. I stole a neighbors cart and got 70 more liters of water. Got the distiller running to give me fresh water by morning. Emptied the waste bucket (mental note: do this BEFORE I leave for trips in the future so its not a block of ice. Then I went to the store and got some more bread and a can of beans, topped it off by breaking some of my coal to use and from there my haasha father in an uncharacteristic display of grammar and assistance showed me a shed where he had placed my kindling wood and he assured me that as long as I used that the axe in the yard was also at my disposal. I got a fire going and then after washing off the coal soot I fixed a Peanut Butter sandwich and turned on some “Truth Beneath the Rose” by Within Temptation and taking a swig of actual coke coke.

I love Mongolia, I love Peace Corps, and I love life. Life is GOOD!!!!!

So that moves us on to today. It’s the morning and im at the school where my fellow teachers are all passing their time by playing endless games of volleyball. You all know my feelings about this enclosed space/whistle blowing sport and the fact that they complain I smell when I work out I am given the great honor of being the audience while they play. So ill do that for the next few days. Get a good run in before the snows and ice hit the roads and finally get some more complex food ingredients from the stores so I can get cracking on some more culinary delights.

Back to the finer…simpler things in life. It’s a wonderful thing!

November 19, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

NEVER….EVER…AGAIN! Strike the ending of my last entry. Right after I wrapped up typing that I got carted off to Ondortolge where I had been recruited into a volleyball team…im wearing jeans and a nice long sleeve shirt and some wool socks!

I have not had to actually play volleyball in over seven or so months. I figured, maybe…just this once…they wouldn’t use a whistle or scream when one of them was trying to hit the ball and that the room wouldn’t be a sauna. For a smart guy academically im pretty damn dumb!

You know they say that the ability for humans to forget their past pains and sufferings is the reason we have more than one child per person. If a woman actually remembered the pain associated with childbirth, she would never even have sex again! I have a far less dramatic example with volleyball in my town. It was everything I hated. Loud, hot, yelled at for always being in the wrong place, and most of all it went on from almost sunrise to complete darkness outside. Nine hours of volleyball. As before I sucked it up for the first four or so hours, and then exhaustion, hunger, and all around stress just started to take its toll on me. They wouldn’t let me leave and all around I spent the final few hours angry as all hell. I would hope my behavior has deterred them from recruiting me into playing volleyball anymore, but given the amount of time I have left in this country and how the cold weather will slow down the number of these stress test tournaments my town and school decide to throw I have decided what I put at the top of the entry. NEVER!!!!EVER!!!!AGAIN!!!!

I don’t care if President Elberdorj himself drops in and wants to play a few rounds. Ill come, ill watch, ill cheer…but I simply cannot do this again. Ive made a fool of myself one too many times.

Good news is that I think I might get that space though. The rest of this day is pretty low maintenance. Im off booze until Thanksgiving as my recent run in UB definitely bled me through a lot of my money. Good clarity for things like running before the snow comes, I don’t care how mild this fall has been it wont be long now.

November 20, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So life has finally gotten back to its calm and quiet pace. Ive decided with my spare time to finally start writing the “Peace Corps Mongolia” book as my blog is excellent reference notes, but it lacks an author like feel. The book wont be that different than the blog though. Think of it like a mix and match between Anthony Bordain and Frank McCourt and their writing styles. I actually met Anthony Bordain on a flight back from Hong Kong to New York. Granted I got to speak to him for all of two seconds but the guy was a bit of an ass! Never meet your heroes….hes not one of them but you get the idea.

Snow is falling at last. Not any more cold than last week, I guess the clouds have finally dropped in. Well enough I guess. Its still not all that cold though in my ger. I have fires available (now that I have everything that I need to readily make them but more so I find myself not particularly needing them still. I like the feel of cold, I do. That crispness and clarity I have when its cold, I really do like it. I also own a space heater. Now before you jump to conclusions first realize that it does NOT make my ger warm. In essence the rapid movement of air pretty much creates enough friction that things in my ger (like 70 liters of water) will simply not be cold enough to freeze in under the 8 or so hours I am not in the ger. That’s really all were talking about people.

Another month, when its REALLY cold again that fire though…mmm…thas gonna feel real good after a long day at work. A week or so till Thanksgiving…my favorite holiday of the year. Fun fun fun!

November 21, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So ive been thinking. I was planning on in January rounding out my Mongolia extensiveness by going on an eagle hunt out near Kazakhstan. About as unique an experience as one could get and all that good stuff. Cold as all hell, awkward and hard to do and cost more than enough because I would have to go through a tour group, but you….lets do it right?

Well I made inquiries with the only tour group I could get in touch with and they don’t arrange for this to happen alone. They want someone to come with. I invited my stepfather but this trip is far away and no picnic so he gave it a rain check (probably working as he always is too!) and the rest of my family…well…there the salt of the earth types and I don’t think salt of the Earth lasts well on horses with Eagles that crush bones and -50 daytime temperatures.

So unfortunately, my winter vacation may not happen. Not this time around anyway. All for the best perhaps, it will leave something inside Mongolia left for me to do!

Meanwhile…that means I need a new vacation. Something…springy I think. 3rd quarter break takes place late March/Early April and after that I am too far into Peace Corps to get to take a vacation out of country. I am not equipped or dressed to do a country like Japan or Korea. India needs more than a week or two, ive done Southeast Asia, and everything else is too far away for me to justify a trip. What to do…what to do… Well a third of the world lives directly beneath me on the globe right? I think I even know a really hot girl from Hong Kong that knows Beijing like the back of her georgous hand and speaks Mandarin/Cantoneese/English…and Mongolian! Yea…lets go to China!!!!!

One final thing that sort of set this straight was ensuring that my dear sweet mother, who is threatening a visit to Asia next summer would not be devastated if I were not able to accompany her on much of her travels. She travels business class and in the company of a good friend so no…no problem at all. I imagine she will be in Mongolia going to my town “um…nice, they like it cold here do they? So that tents yours um? Ah lovely…right along!” If shes truly Mongol crazy ill set her up with a 5 or so day tour group that handle gringos like her and me and she can safely ride all the horses she wants to before she goes to China.

So yea….instead of freezing my ass off in the winter in a place even colder than where I live now I instead get to spend a few weeks of the otherwise cold and windy Spring in the land of China. Theres something to think on for a bit I suppose.

November 28, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

…and on the next morning…My computer went dead. No fun, but I had gone through this before.

This is not an easy country on technology. Living close to smoky fires, frigid outdoors and a lot of animal hair all around never directly damage your machines, but the damage worms its way in little by little. Soon you find yourself in a town with no bars/cafes/ friends who have no passions in life other that drinking vodka until their innards explode and so on. So I got some good runs in, reread some of the less frequented books of mine and burned some more fires.

The primary reason everyone keeps asking if I am cold is directly related to the infrequency of fires I make (only one a day, usually at the start of dusk!) so ive picked up the pace and….they still ask. Nothing for it.

My ipod had been inactive for a while and therefore the cold had sucked all the power out of the machine so I had no music either. No fun, no fun indeed. Without internet I found myself once again not being able to go to CNN each day and check on current events. One blank screen and things suddenly got a whole lot darker. For instance, next time I was able to check the news I found out that N. Korea lost its mind (a little more anyway) and started to shell S. Korea. Really???? More impressive to me is that this has not exploded into a war already. I mean think about if this had happened ANYWHERE else…yea…. It seems even the South Korean citizens are sorta in the “Uh….government/military you guys wanna hit back already?” Granted that WILL set off a major war but to do nothing is going to make N. Korea realize they really can do anything they want.

Now for the most annoying thing to me about all this is that this was not then and still does not seem to be what the news agencies care about. They care about Dancing with the Stars and nonsense like that. Go figure….

Well Wednesday rolled in and I got on a meeker to UB. This computer needed fixing before Saturdays made up holiday. I go to the place I went before, the Mac guy is not there…not going to be there until the next week…well that’s a problem!

I know theres a huge store that sells all sorts of odds and ends for computers. I know what I am looking for to Zacvarcan….repair (or its equivalent) I scan the first floor and cant find it so I ask and a little errand boy gestures for me to walk with him into the basement. I know you kinda had to see the place and all, but I had it on very likely authority that I was being taken down here to be jumped, slaughtered and sold as scrap…oh and they would take my computer too!

Still we round the corned (of several dark alley rows) and find ourselves at a tiny cubbyhole that looks to be indeed a repair shop. The dude is all smiles as I try to explain things like “motherboard” and “video card” to him in Mongolian before he gets done laughing and he asks me to park it away from him.

…then I sit for about three hours. No idea what he did. I was too nervous/over my head to complain and so he finally gives me back my computer that I really really wish I had booted up and played with the keyboard before leaving. He asked me to go lite on my video game playing as indeed that would be what broke it last time (less Civilization IV I guess, more time to write my book.)

It cost a bit, but now I got a location with a dude with regular hours and a warrenty lasting the rest of my service. Cant guarantee this will keep working but at least I got a computer fix guy now…always something huh.

The next three or so days in UB was a constant state of intoxication. I would be upset with myself about this but you sorta had to be there. It was just….good gods there was a lot to drink and way too good company to not do so. Everyone stayed safe enough, and the drinks were all good enough. Did a little file swapping with some fellow computer users and in essence waited until Thanksgiving on Saturday. Went to that and….well, food of the gods never sounded more appropriate. We ate so much, drank REALLY good wine, and we also watched our old swearing in video from 15 months ago. Good gods we all look so young…MY HAIR!!!!

The next day we got in a meeker and headed back. I find myself here, back to work and about eight or so weeks from another school break. Horray!

Daybreak in Bagakhangai. It seems everyday this town gives me another reason to love it!

Im not sure why, but i think this is one of the most beautiful pictures i have taken here in Mongolia. Thats the town of Nalikh that i pass en route to UB. The snow had become a sheet of ice on the road and even the most stalwart drivers found themselves gliding and sliding. My towns driver is top notch as we never even skidded once!

The food i created for the teachers. It took an entire afternoon to throw it together, they would devour it in about ten minutes. The pizza anyway, it doesnt bother me, it proved that i am actually feeding myself which none of them seem to believe.

It didnt have meat...but i think they liked the pizza. The salad was untouched, i ate that over the next three days

Heres the students doing their English Presentations to the things that they were supposed to write, but instead copied from a flyer they got in a library and had me type. If you can read whats being presented you will see its the narration of a man from the 19th century!

Happiness is clothes that are cleaned by a machine. In all fairness even with me hand washing them they get pretty damn rank. My boxers were old when they got here, i dont know if they will survive to the end.

September 29, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “The greatest sign of intelligent life off this planet is that so far they have decided not to contact us.” –Some smart guy told me that once.

Bought a can of tomato sauce today. Its another one of the canned goods that I did not know my town had for the past year. With that and noodles I sat in my ger, using up most of the last of my water but on a two stover I cooked up a bowl of noodles along with tomato sauce to go with it. It was old as hell, from Russia but basically I really didn’t want to drink tonight so I spent my money on food other than potatoes. Good for me!

I don’t know how to describe how strange I found the sensation to be doing that. Last year when living in my bareboned apartment when I had finally learned how to boil water I would just eat the noodles plain. It would be another month until I discovered the use of butter and another month after that before I remembered that I had bought and brought spices. Back then as I sat in the apartment I felt like a sleeper agent who was spending his time waiting for a phone call where they would give me my activation word.

This evening as I sat looking at the wall of my ger and the pasta boiling on one burner and the sauce on the other I had an even stranger sensation. I felt…normal! Like I was not even in my apartment in Ondortolge from last year, but from when I was living in an apartment alone in the Bronx at Fordham University for the last two years. Seriously as I sat looking at the two stoves burn I couldn’t remember I am living in a tent right now.

When I turned around and saw a stove in the center of my room and the crappy bed I sleep on and not an apartment I was taken by surprise. It was such an ordinary meal for such an extraordinary setup. Im living in a ger, eating pasta that was probably 3 years old when I bought it and pasta sauce from a Russian company that still uses USSR for its insignia. I have been living here so long and in one grand wave of realism I came to the realization that everything I am doing is so one of a kind that I even had a weird burst of giggle in which I sort of blew snot on myself.

…and then I started eating.

Talking about food again, life is definitely boring again. School goes well. Its really easy now that I have adopted a “don’t get angry” policy at pretty much everything I encounter.

Yesterday I submitted my proposal to Peace Corps that we get started filing a documentary so it will be done by the 20th anniversary of Peace Corps next summer in Mongolia. If they read it and said cool or if they burst into tears laughing over and over again remains a great mystery.

….oh yea, despite how crappy it probably was, the food tasted delicious. Totally worth not buying vodka over! Least until the weekend.

September 30, 2010. Bagakhagnai, Mongolia.

They did something really shitty at my school today. It doesn’t bother me as much this year for three reasons. The first is that having been here for a year I knew their default position on this and so I somewhere just knew that it was just a matter of time before they did this. The second being that….okay I know how bad this sounds but im not all that interested in the teaching aspect of my Peace Corps experience this time around. I always like to teach, but I am not using it as an indicator of if my time here in Peace Corps is productive or not. Ill tell you the third after I tell you what they did.

Today and last night my two counterparts in class divided up their 4th and 5th grade classes. I take half the kids, they take the other half…no English clubs so that we could improve the skills of the English teachers to the point that they could actually speak English to their students. No seminars on using new and innovative teaching styles instead of the Soviet model still in effect of writing what’s on the board. No implementation by all students of those laptops they all now own and don’t know how to use. In essence I as a Teacher Trainer (not a TEFL) will do nothing to improve teacher skills in my 2nd year here. Nope, just take half my students Josh and ill see you in June!

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Nope…not gonna get angry.

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But I will say this…

Put aside I was a teacher before I got to Mongolia. Put aside I am a teacher trainer and I haven’t taught a single teacher a single thing in my 15 or so months here. Put aside most of the teachers of last year just dumped their classes on me so they could drink in the lounge. Put aside that it looks like that is what is going to happen now (without as much drinking and more internet useage). Put aside I know some PCV TEFL’s who never taught a day in their life prior to coming here and in their sites not only do they get to work together with their counterparts but they even are getting to organize training seminars to teach something that up until a year ago they had never done.

Put ALL this aside…

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…

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No im just not going to get angry at this.

I would sit around being annoying and rude for a few days and in the end I would still go along with the arrangement that they had set up but then they would be angry at me. Then as time goes on I would still be happy that I get to be a teacher as well as the other aid groups and services that I have provided to my community and the like.

So in essence this is going to be one of the first times in my life that I will learn from my past so as to not piss away the present because of something shitty that has happened.

The ger experience from the last year taught me something today huh?

At least my old strategy for classroom management is more warmly received at this school than it had at my last. The teachers here all still hit the kids, and once again its just something im not willing to do. Actually in my time here I have begun to see why they do so, and I begin to see that while I don’t agree with it I understand why its still very much in effect here. Today I had a disruptive kid, just a total ass. They know by now that I wont hit em, but today when one kid decided to defy me right in front of the whole class it was obvious that today we determined who was in charge of the class.

Unlike last year where I spent the first six months shouting at them and trying to move them all around. So today after he looked up and grinned while the whole class giggled I put his backpack on him, and then by the strap dragged him out of my class. When he tried to reenter to the giggles of my class I did something a little more dramatic and once again by the strap of his bag I dragged him out. This time I took him out of the school and ordered him not to come again inside until the next bell rang. I did this in the view of the windows of my class so they all saw it.

As I walked back into the school the teachers all sort of looked over at me and gave me that sort of grinning nod. The “I wouldn’t have done THAT! But im glad you did something look.” He sat outside miserable for 20 minutes and I imagine for the rest of the week the kids will gossip how he was banned from the school. Maybe next time he will not try to class clown it when I am around! Especially as colder weather approaches.

Its not hitting them, but in a country where I cant fail them I guess that will have to do. I miss being able to fail students, such an effective measure against so many! Maybe not all, but at least more than I have control over here. Let em fail students in this country and suddenly corporal punishment will come to a screeching halt.

Im going running…

October 1st 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Wow, it’s the first time in a long time that ive gotten to stay in my town without having to go to UB for some reason for more than two weeks. Kick ass! Now I can sit around and play with my new stove and run consistently and all that good stuff! Weekends rock! I think ill even buy some more tomato sauce and eat something that is not bread, butter, potatoes and plain noodles!

So I still don’t own a dog. The eight or nine or so little puppies of my haasha family’s offspring continue to run around the yard and whatnot. Getting taller and stronger. Ive already asked for one and they said yes, so I imagine when its time for them to euthanize the ones no ones taking they will hand me over one. Its gotta be hard for the dog to sleep outside with how cold its getting.

I could use a dog. Actually I could use a cat, but I think a dog will do what I need for my ger. I currently don’t have a dog or a cat, I have a mouse. I’ve even started to recognize him and it’s the same damn mouse that’s been annoying my ger for the past two weeks. I don’t understand what he is doing in here. There’s no food he can eat or get to (ive checked), the ger is freezing half the time so what the hell is it doing in here?

I guess at night when I crank up the heat he drops in for some sleep. Theres dirt all around the ger so the dude must be one hell of a burrower…or he figured something out, who knows. Point is I am both a cat and a dog person and I even am a hamster person, but the mouse thing is just not working for me. I figure if a half sized puppy takes up space in here he will take issue with the mouse and that will be the end of that. Meanwhile since I no longer sleep on the floor I am not that worried of being bitten or anything and so ill go with it for now.

Friday night. Im short on cash so im on half alcohol rations this weekend (I have money, I just need to wait for the end of the weekend when Khan Bank opens.) Maybe my fellow teacher ladies (im the only male teacher or staff member at the school!) will invite me over for some fun and games, or you know I figure ill get a good hour or two run in as well. The weather is not going to allow too many more of those. I spend the last two weeks finally getting my running legs back and now the weather kicks in.

…if it weren’t this it would be something else huh? Cheers….now im going to watch a Mono movie called Duane Hopwood.

October 2, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Oh gods, what have I done?

We make a lot of “mistakes” in life. You can interpret your mistakes in so many different ways. Buddha had a lot to say about mistakes btw, but lets keep this at a non-existential plane. Some mistakes are casual. Tripped going up the steps. Picked the wrong bottle of shampoo in the shower (ah…I remember showers) Other mistakes take longer to fix. Bad investments, wrong major, things like that.

Then you reach the upper circles where a singular mistake is something that will damage you for the remainder of your life. A watershed event of sorts, where you realize that what just happened has set in motion events that you could live forever and never undo. I personally don’t have too many of these. Only one I can think about is that I went to SE Asia instead of getting a job as a teacher near Vanderbilt after I met Rachel.

Today I discovered a new type of mistake…and I made it…and I have fallen…fallen so very…very…far.

Lets go to the backstory. With the internet now at my disposal after a year without I have found myself often enough with some time on my hands to play around at school. A day or two ago either my sister or a friend of mine named Erin typed in on Facebook “YEAY! The Britney Spears episode of Glee is on tonight!” To which I aptly replied “What the hell is Glee?”

That needs some explanation too. You see when you join the Peace Corps you cant keep up with television like you used to. New television shows have popped up in the past two years I hadn’t heard of that apparently are a huge hit in America. This is not the first time it has happened to me either, as I missed the creation of Survivor as I sat on a tiny little boat off the coast of Maine when Survivor came out. I believe that is why I never got on board with that show.

One of these shows which I then researched when my sister did not respond was Glee. A show in which through both a club and fantasies a group of kids (who actually all appear in their 20’s) dance and sing a lot of pop stuff to work out the toils of their lives. Ah, I can remember how much I thought my problems at 17 actually mattered…im so glad I was wrong about absolutely every single one of them….

So to get back on topic theres a show called Glee that I had never seen an episode of and yet after hearing about it being a show with a lot of singing and dancing its obviously not something for me….but there was the second part of the thing Erin’s post had said.

…Britney…

…Hello my names Josh and I am a 29 year old straight guy who still likes Britney Spears. To the people born after 1986 or so Britney was someone who when she was dancing around at 16 they were 10 or younger. An icon, someone to treat as a role model or something.

Meanwhile when Britney was 16 so was I. This was not a role model for me, this was a hot woman…actually that’s all I really needed. The songs were not all bad either, especially considering at that point all I ever listened to was Weird Al Yankovic (my family can all confirm that) Britney even turns my age of 29 in a month or two. So I watched Britney for a whole different reason…a really really good reason. Nope, not apologizing for it. Been laughed at enough im used to it. I like her, and I found her quite hot (especially that period when we were both around 20-22….yea that was sorta the golden age.)

So with Hulu and high speed internet at my disposal I watched the episode.

…and that brings us back to the mistake I made. The new type of mistake I made. The mistake that goes beyond you realizing that you’ve destroyed the future. Watching this episode certainly did that, but then it also did something I didn’t think was possible…

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It has destroyed my past.

The concerts I went to see her perform. The CD’s, the ridicule of defending her to my college class in English 101, the uploading of her music from tape to CD to mp3 to Itunes to Ipod itself. Ten or more years of enjoying Britney in so many different ways…

…

and after watching the Britney episode of Glee they make me want to vomit. Especially the girl who loved/hated Britney. I just cant believe I actually found pleasure in Britney in different ways…its just…I…ruined…her. I don’t think I ever want to hear Britney again nor do I think I can recall Britney from my past with a happy thought anymore.

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And its all because I watched a stupid new American tv show…

…good gods of Kobold…

what have I done?

Morale of this story: GLEE SUCKS!

October 3, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I got a text message from Esther today. Shes up at the town of Tsaagennuur right next to the Taiga in the north. Its amusing how I was there only two months ago. Well she just came back from the East Taiga as well. Her message made me grin. She had come back empty handed as well. No reindeer. Seriously they just aren’t round in the East Taiga on the main river areas. Now that the snow has come they likely have all backed up onto the secondary rivers that fuel the Tengis river.

So she seems rather annoyed and unlike me she has a tad more time. At points the snow was up to her hip, and given how hard that trail was in the Summer that is some tough stuff! Esther is the type for adventure so she is now headed to the West Taiga to find those blasted reindeer. That’s even harder to get to…Good luck Esther.

Reindeer aren’t real….i knew it!

October 4, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So I taught solo in the small little classroom outside the main building today. The kids are super jazzed to be taught by the gringo despite how hard it is to understand me or to read my handwriting but still it’s the enthusiasm that is all I needed. So I didn’t get angry and it turns out everything was alright with the arrangement anyway.

YOU SEE!!! I actually learned from my mistakes in the past! GO ME!!!!!

My water container I bought last week has started to leak out all my water. Ive had the thing for less than a month, its done nothing but sit at a corner of my ger and somehow its already become garbage. Ive seen grandparents carting around water containers that looked as old as they were that still held water and mine is already broke. Always something….

Luckily they are cheap. Gonna buy a bigger one next time i am in Naarantuul. That and a chair that doesn’t fall apart like the camping chair I bought.

To cheer myself up this afternoon I went on a five mile run. I love those as the weather is right now that perfect cold crisp feel that’s not like it will be in three months and the sweat that comes out of you then freezes and glasses onto your body and the snot in your nose crystallizes and expands puffing out your nose. You gotta love the winter! It is coming….IT IS COMING!!!

October 5, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today I was recruited into finding the Monoglian version of the World Cup theme song “Wave Your Flag” That was a hunt believe me. When I finally found it it turns out that I know the band that sings it. Its these four teenagers who are always used to express the diversity within Mongolia and I know the single qualification you need to be in this group (the ability to speak a lot of languages) Ive also been drafted to sing the English version of “Wave your flag” at the World Cup thing my town is throwing this weekend. Don’t get too excited, its basically a weekend of soccer, were just first going to sing.

Ill say this about the world cup, while it provided some great entertainment at beer tents over the summer with travelers of the world (I was cheering for a different team every five minutes) it also has finally replaced the Michael Jackson song “We Are the World” that has been blaring on every single cell phone in this country for the last year.

I got an email back from an old friend at GMU today, Brian Davis. I feel like reminiscing, so let me take you back to a day we all remember. September 11th, 2001. We all know it as a national tragedy. Indeed it was. Yet what happened the next day caused quite a stir at the dormitory I was living in. The RA we had had for two weeks named Josh had cleared out the night of the 11th and written on a piece of paper he stuck to his door. “I have left college so I can read my bible and walk more closely with God” That afternoon I was in Brian Davis’s office, asking to take over the position. They checked my GPA and when they saw I was above 2.5 and I hadn’t answered their questions like a complete moron I was moving my stuff into the RA room that evening. “Funny the Way It Is” never seemed to apply quite so much as to how I stumbled into one of my most successful and enjoyable careers of Residence Life in Higher Education.

Like all of us I wish 9/11 had never happened… yet I cannot imagine my life today if that event had not happened.

Well the man who gave me the job and was my direct supervisor for the next five or six years was Brian Davis. “Big Dog” never suited a man better than he. He was exactly what I needed at that stage in my life. Kept my rambunction in check and gave me the serious look to get me through those rare moments when I actually had to act the part of an adult in my career. It’s during my time as an RA I met my two life friends David and Martha as well.

But back to Brian, that man has been at that school since I was 13, and he has known me since I was 19 years old. Outside of my family, he/David/and Martha are the only ones who have known me throughout all of my 20’s. My oh my how I have changed. I will say though that I am glad were down to three people who knew me back when I was 20. I am tolerable now, imagine me emotionally 10 years younger and you get the idea.

In the email he was full of fun stories from GMU. I didn’t really realize just how much I miss that place until he started talking about it. He mentioned how the dorms they had been putting up brand new when I was 22 are now the buildings that the Freshmen are getting stuck in and how more and more is there that was not before. Unlike all the change that I hate for some reason I don’t mind that about GMU. Its like a happy resignation that I knew my time at GMU was not something that would or even could last forever. I loved all my time at that school, but by far the greatest growth and time of my life came in the summer of 2004 on that campus. The summer of the turn around. The watershed of my 20’s. Where I either got it together, lost the weight, passed the grad school, or fell from pride and find myself in the most standard ways of life. Running everyday, great food, great friends, maturity FINALLY catching up to me, Lord of the Rings out on DVD, …in essence the time of my life. Its probably the first time in my life I am not mad at change, because if it was still there I could pretend to relieve it but it would not stand up to what it was before. Now it’s immortalized. Forever a part of who I am and what I became. And now its something else indeed.

…so yea that email made me miss GMU.

My reminiscing definitely gave the option of “Returning to Higher Education” a few bonus points.

October 6, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Yesterday as I didn’t have classes until the afternoon I took the morning shuttle bus over to Ondortolge in order to go to the bank for the first time since August in addition to catching up with the old staff members at the other school. On our way we had to drive through some of the countryside on the outskirts of Ondortolge and they drove me past an old falling apart building. There are plenty of these and the Soviets had actually used a great number of explosives to leave craters instead of buildings when they left.

This building hadn’t been destroyed in this way but neglect and time left only one wall standing. As we passed it I could see why the wall was still there. On it was a mural drawn. It was something that only time and weather would destroy, but for now the faded image of this mural struck me so soundly. On it was one of the massive Vosstock rockets created by the Soviets during the Space Race blasting off into space. It had the image of a famous cosmonaut on it as well and the great propoganda regailing the heroes of the Soviets. It was a mural to the Soviet Space program. I had thought Mongolia contains only natural beauty. Today I saw something I hadn’t really seen all that much of in over a year. The type of history made by man. Some who know me know I sorta used to worship the space program, and it remains something I most definitely intend to continue to pursue in my quest to be a lifelong learner.

Ill have to go back sometime this year to photograph it. If I could I would take the whole 20 foot by 10 foot wall with me!

October 7, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Good classes today. Work is pretty simple. I got an email from my stepfather today. I hadn’t heard from him in a while and I am glad I got to. He sounded happy and healthy which is just how I like all of my family, and he has also agreed to ship in the next Harry Dresden book. That will be something to look forward to as winter approaches.

The people making the new school directly next to us are still hard at work despite the seasonal construction people usually wrap up at the end of September. These are not your usual blue collar Mongol workers. These guys are the real deal. The type who actually are on a salary and have engineering school experience. That means that what would take 3 summers will actually be done in one year. The school will be up and running just in time for me to leave. I am sure the next PCV’s to work in this community will be all smiles and thrilled to work in it.

I wrapped up my afternoon/evening with a 3-5 mile run. Wow once your in shape I tell ya, NOTHING feels better then running yourself ragged.

October 8, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today I got an email about applications for being one of the trainers at the IST training for the M21’s. I didn’t get to be a summer trainer, which I thought sucked because I have run conferences before. I was an RD for cryin aloud. So I filled out the application and will try again. Still, if I don’t get the job again I am not going to let that get to me. I really am trying to take a lesson from my ger experience and not getting angry at things that I don’t get immediately. Still, im hopeful. I filled out a pretty good application.

Today at 12 me and my fellow teachers at Bagakhangai were taken on a trip to Ondortolge for teacher training… ill repeat that. I… “I”….a TEACHER TRAINER….went with fellow teachers to be taught by another teacher trainer. Could I just say how proud I am for not getting annoyed by this at all?

October 9, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So the conference became volleyball, meat and drinking (your surprised?) Nope we arrived, and a school from UB had come to challenge my school to volleyball. All women, just like my school now. All of them were urban and cosmo as well, and in terms of sports my town handed their asses to them. Really, really handed their asses to them. Good thing about that is it meant the rematches were called for in November at their school in UB.

Anyways, we had a dance/drink thingy as we stalled for food to be cooked and the night which was going to be so boring became a blast. By the by, those women from UB are pretty damn cosmo. One woman with legs long enough you could climb up them walked across the room, reached into my pocket, took my phone and punched in her number before evil grin walking away. Damn that was hot!

So that was yesterday, todays a tad different. Today this school has been driving me nuts. I think its now so cold no kid wants to be outside, and with nothing to do and being the only building in the whole town that is heated everyone is in here playing ear bleeding music and wrestling and demanding to know what I am doing on my computer. Actually the kids of the town all used to hang out at the school on the weekend as well, but unlike the massive former sport barracks that was the old school this school is one corridor and four classrooms, throw in the 500 or so kids using the school and this place gets awfully damn crowded.

Then when they see that I am tying a word document they seem to think this is the most important thing they have ever seen and proceede to hover by the dozen. I am not a person who does well with needless attention when I am just sitting at a computer typing up. Especially when people pump in a metric ton of speed metal and screaming voices down the hall. Its my own stress test this year.

I guess the easy remedy would be to do something else on the weekend aside from the school. I used to go to UB but its been over three weeks now and aside from needing a new water container I don’t really see any reason to go into UB these days either. I am sort of waiting for the cosolidation drill that is supposed to take place some time in the month of October and use that to spend some time in a hot water shower and some pizza and burgers and beer….but ill see how I feel next weekend if the call for consolidation does not come.

Who would have thought sitting in a school I always sit in and not doing any real work could bring about stress?

October 10, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today my town put on a concert. Usually we go to the culture center in Ondortolge for these things but today is a tad different as its all and only for Bagakhangai kids. The theatre in this town is so damn cool. It used to be a garage for those giant oil tankers of sorts, and they turned it into a theatre. This town of mine really makes you wonder what the buildings we use in America will be like when our star is no longer in ascension. It makes you think, and it can scare the hell out of you if you let it. Or you realize that your one of many carbon based lifeforms that will continue to build off that which was left behind until the end of our existence as a whole, be it comet, ice age, solar flare, plague, or good ole fashioned war.

Remember, if the existence of time up until now was measured on a single days worth of time, mankind has existed since 11:59pm and 58 seconds! Blink and youll miss us!

Anyway, I digress…the concert.

Mostly little kids, mostly songs, mostly not that good. I know I know there kids, but I mean it some of those kids weren’t even singing just shouting of sorts. Really? Really?

Still, its Sunday so aside from wasting time on the internet it was not like I had a whole lot to do and such so I sat in the cool oil tanker garage and watched the kids in my town sing. Go life, go Peace Corps!

October 11, 2010.

Its beautiful in my town this week. Its got a cold, crisp feel in the air that doesn’t leave you bedridden as it will in January and February. The trees are all bright beautiful colors and the sun is still out and shining during the day, giving you a warm feeling even in the cold. I love October, it feels like a cold Thanksgiving back in the United States. Yea, that’s a good way to describe it.

Wow, 16 months in the Peace Corps. Seriously? 16 months? Blink of an eye…. 8 months or so of service left. Least until were back to the Summer, with beer gardens and no work. That means it’s the 2/3rds mark. What the hell it felt like the halfways point yesterday!

So Esther called me. She just got done roaming the Western Taiga and even claims to have seen Reindeer…I have my doubts. But still, glad to hear she was okay. Her visa is at its end, but were going to try to meet up one last time before that happens.

My mother complains that I don’t seem to talk about her much in the blogs for as much as she has been around since July. (I think it’s a little unhealthy how unbothered I am about my mom asking for more details about my relationship with a woman) No but its probably the healthiest relationship I have had with a woman in my entire life. I think it sort of a Jeaneane Garafalo/Ben Stiller type setup except shes way hotter. She’s a traveler like me, adventurous, drinks as much as I do, she’s also tough, smoking hot (im not gonna pretend like that didn’t help), and I must be doing something with her that makes her continue to want to hang out with me. Everyone go ahead and draw conclusions from that all you like. I even learned something that I didn’t know was possible…and it made me secretly very proud as well…sorry, cant elaborate on a blog.

We also did the smartest thing we could about our geographic hardships and both decided a while back at my towns Naadam that once she headed to Hong Kong we were just gonna let this go. We hadn’t attached outside the physical, we had a good time in Mongolia that was made better by one anothers company. Ill keep her email and we can share a pipe dream of her being my translator/guide when I finish Peace Corps and tear through China, but in essence were gonna let our time here in Mongolia be the beginning and the happy end as well. Nothing drawn out, nothing that goes sour. It ends with a smile. Come to think of it, this will be the first relationship of mine to ever end well. That’s disturbing to realize in some ways, and also may go a long way to improving myself.

October 12, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today we come across what one might call a “game changer” Up until this point I have only used my oven for baked potatoes. Pretty easy to make obviously. Potato and time make baked potato. Good storage food. Today though when I went to get a coke I found something in their fridge that I hadn’t seen before. I sorta kept looking at it and not really believing what I saw. There was just no way. I mean sure my railroad store has all sorts of diverse foods and yea they even have the odd can of tomato sauce…but theres just no way what I am looking at is real.

…

…BAESLICKK!!!!!!!!

…

you call it cheese.

It’s a food so rare in Mongolia that they don’t have a word for it, they use the Russian word for it. Cheese is something your not aware of how much you love it until you don’t have it, then its all you want.

Then I did inventory on what I have available.

I have flour for making dough, I have tomato sauce…and now I have cheese that I can shred up, and I own an oven….

…

…by Zeus and all the Gods…I can make a pizza. Well that’s it. I am never leaving this town ever again.

Okay maybe once or twice for errands to the black market and a trip out to see some friends and an eagle hunt but serious I now have every last whimsical thing I had ever dreamed of. I really may weep.

Now of course, these things are not cheap, but I figure if I don’t drink except on weekends and I keep up the diet of potatoes and noodles during the week then on the weekends I will have the time and the money to treat myself to homemade pizzas. Oh that’s a food blog if I ever imagined one.

Guys…it already was heaven here, now its heaven with the food of the gods…. Though they could use some hummus…wow I could complain until the end of time couldn’t I? A food blog is coming…keep an eye out for it.

October 13, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well, ive made a command decision. This had a lot of factors involved in it, but no matter, it is what it will be. After looking at Peace Corps webpage and weighing my career options I have decided NOT to apply for any specific Peace Corps fellowships of next year.

The reasons for this are as follows. 1) I can study anywhere and anything, my career post Peace Corps meanwhile will not be as diverse….though I am still unsure what it is exactly that I am going to be doing at the conclusion of next summer its pretty obvious that it will be somewhere area specific. If I start applying to fellowships I will need to bend my career around that instead of the much easier option of bending my academics around a career. If I find myself back in higher education its likely that I will have tuition remission anyways, meanwhile if I work for the government after this I will likely find myself in some kind of urban environment and Peace Corps has fellowships for universities in practically every single one. 2) It’s a little early to start working towards the doctorate…. When Peace Corp ends for me ill be 30. I have been in higher education for over ten years and posess 2 masters degrees. I know that Dr. Jacobs has a good ring to it but that will take time regardless, and meanwhile I am pretty sure that starting school learning again the instant I get back may be over pressuring. Ill see how I feel next fall, I can always audit classes anyway. 3) I may stay with Peace Corps…. If they will have me anyway. Basically I could make some kind of government administrative work my career easily. The trouble is I am not sure which is better…get in entry level, work to mid ground…then get the doctorate so I can get the endgame career options that require a doctorate OR do the doctorate first. Its hard to assess. But I am sure one way or another going for a fellowship right off the bat is a little premature.

Hey look at me…I learned patience! Or at least I learned how to demonstrate patience!

October 14, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So, its Thursday and tomorrow is the middle of October. Though if it were up to me id stick around im pretty much willing to bet all the money I have in the bank (around 20 bucks) that this weekend will be the consolidation drill where all PCV’s are required to “consolidate” and mine is the PC office in UB. So itll be an excuse to drink, eat and be merry. Good stuff good stuff.

Yesterday it started hailing outside a little, it was a tad weird as that hail along with the snow that has so far fallen has been rather moist. Very different from the snow I recall from last year. I guess its just not sub-zero outside and so the snow is not as brittle as it will be come December or so. Very well…

My teachers all ask me about why I am not lighting a fire in my ger. They seem convinced I cant. I think at some point I am going to invite them all over in the evening so they can watch me make a coal fire so they don’t bother me about it as much. I cant understand why this would bother them so much. It means im not burning fuel and I show up to world alive and healthy each day…whats the big deal? No matter…

I have eaten nothing but homemade pizza for the last two days, and now I head to town where they make even better pizzas…something tells me my diet has just immensely diversified for the next eight or so months!

Oh, heres something funny to end the blog on. On Monday, Thursday and Friday me and Sarangoo teach 7th grade. Sarangoo on the first week told them all to buy the school textbook for the English grade. They all bought the English 7 book. Problem is that they don’t start learning English until 4th grade when they take English 1. That means they all bought the book for the 11th grade. Well, at least they will be ahead of the curve!

October 15, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

So last night I was watching a movie called “Duane Hopwood” It’s a really vague movie made about three or so years ago. Unless you’re a real movie buff you have never heard of it and I wouldn’t blame you. Youtube it if you want to see the trailer, you will get the jist. Its not special, famous, or even really that good. It’s one of those films that I call a “mono movie” A film where not a whole hell of lot happens so if you fall asleep halfway through the movie and wakeup (as mono people are like to do) you can just keep watching. The other reason I call it a mono movie is that its really not all that much of a feel good movie. Not like a Greek tragedy, just a movie that wont give you a warm feeling at the end as so many others will.

It’s a movie about a guy whose pretty much aware that his life has turned to garbage and he has no way out. He just moves on from one day to another, drinking mostly because hes a sleepy drunk and so forth. When I watch the movie I sort of realize why I watch it so. I don’t yearn for anything in it. I don’t realize the meaning of life from it or how to live my life differently from it or anything like that. No instead when I watch this I realize just how easily the main character of this movie could have been me. One decision here or there, one lucky break I never deserved to get but still did and I could have just as easily been this guy. Some people lose things to realize how badly they wanted them. I watch movies like this to realize just how impossibly lucky I have been, and how easily one decision your not even aware of would or even could bring me around to a fate like this…

…that’s the kind of movie that makes me think,…

…

…and on that depressing note….im in UB!!!!

I just got out of the shower and let me tell you. That water….seriously aside from my bountiful hair I really have no idea where all that black comes from. Must be the ger living that has really kicked it up a notch. Well consolidation happened. I was first place for the soum consolidators. Little by little we all now trek in. It was the right timing for my once a month trips to the capital. Pizza and decent beer will occupy the rest of my time. Tomorrow I think I will go to the black market to buy a water container that is not leaking as well as look around. I have pretty much everything I need right now but its still not that cold out and so it would do me some good to look around. Ill offer to take a few of the M21’s along with me as well who may not know the place like I do.

Yep, life rolls along, but now with cleaner hair.

I just got some really bad news from my friend Esther….this is bad.

October 18, 2010. Naarantull Market en route to Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Okay, well I wrote something grim in my last entry I better clarify. Esther is fine, in fact shes here in this bus with me. I got a call from her when she was traveling back from Tsaagen Nuur and she had your worst case scenario thing. It was her and seven grabby drunk guys in the dark who refused to understand things like the word no or a sharp kick. When she got back to UB I wanted her to see a doctor but she wouldn’t, nor will she talk about it all that much. It’s a terrible thing to happen to her, and I am worried that she is trying to bottle it up and put it behind her, and that can be worse down the line…. More on that later.

So consolidation went great. Got to see a lot of the old gang, especially some of the Erdene crew I had not had the pleasure of seeing in a long long time. Everyone looks happy and healthy. The first day was lost to crazy conversations and pizzas. Saturday was when Esther arrived and I spent the day talking to her and hanging out. She had some errands to run related to her volunteer work, and an exit visa and all that.

Sunday was when I went back to the black market yet again to buy yet another water container to replace the one I had that was one month old and already leaking. This new one is twice the size and will hopefully cut down on the number of trips I make (I drink a lot of water)

Esther decided to spend her final few days in my town before she makes the long train ride back to Hong Kong. Lucky me. Its been an amazing time with her, and it is what it is I suppose. A really good time between two people worlds apart. It is what it is….i hate that expression! Its like when you tell someone “…oh I don’t know. Does anyone ever DO anything to anyone else???”

I also bought a chair. A really…really good chair for my ger. This is a video game chair. The type that feels SO good to sit on and you are in a relaxed position. It cost me the rough equivalent of a weekend of heavy drinking so I figure that’s a good price.

October 21, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Todays Quote: “Were grown men, over the age of 35 who moved in together. Were two tigers away from an act in Vegas.” –House

Well, Esther left. Headed to Hong Kong nearing her journeys end. Its strange, but seriously this is one of the healthiest relationships I have ever had. She taught me a lot, helped me heal some. Didn’t change anything really, just reminded me that being without the one you love doesn’t mean you cant be happy with others for the rest of your life.

She left yesterday, and as usual my ger is now an utter mess. Ill need to get motivated and clean it soon. Good news is that since I was gone for the weekend noone was around to warm my ger and it looks as though the mice in my ger have starved/frozen to death. I threw out two bodies of them in my garbage this morning. Fun fun! At least I have water though! That helps. I couldn’t find a cart so I had to carry it. 70 liters of water is heavy as hell!

The teachers are all being inspected teaching by the government this week so they are running around in a panic and generally concerned about how things are going. Its strange to see them actively preparing for English lessons and whatnot. It must be what I look like a lot of the time.

I read the PC newsletter for Mongolia and it turns out I was one of the volunteers of the month! Granted I nominated myself, but good for me!

So onto something going on in America. Right now it’s the 20th of October in the United States and so it’s the day we all wear purple to demonstrate to our gay friends that they are not alone and not to let a few assholes get to them by wearing purple. Do you all remember life 20 years ago? Seriously I was nine and I remember how uptight America was. Ellen came out and Newt Gingrich told us it was a slap in the face of family values. Regions of America would not air it! Its less than a generation later, and yes things are better…and as Hillary Clinton paraphrased yes things need to be a whole lot better too! Itll happen, little by little. History demonstrates that over and over again. By the by, everyone is aware we have had gay American Presidents right? Not Lincoln either…look up bachelor presidents of the 19th century, I wont just go out and say his name…look for the pretty boy bachelor, and better still once you find him and see his physique wonder if he was a top or a bottom. It’s a short list you will find him quick enough.

I am a little curious what homophobic people think how this is going to play out. Seriously near the end of current young adults lifetime when their kids are reading history books and the picture of the fence in Wyoming where Michael Sheppard was beaten to death I am a little curious if they plan to omit that they were the ones who picketed gay kids funerals or blocked legislation against gay marriage. No, I imagine much like those who threw food on blacks at the Greensboro sit ins or who swung clubs on Marchers back in the 60’s they will all simply grumble about how terrible the world is and fade away while their kids remain ignorant of what their parents inclinations had been. Just a little annoying that they have clout in this day and age.

Living in Mongolia brings about a different perspective on what exactly homophobia is though. For example, the amount of true homophobia is extremely low, especially outside of the major urban centers. It doesn’t exist, neither in practice or even in a physical word. Our mongolian dictionaries use the word “same love” to describe a homosexual. “Lesbian” is translated either as “Woman same love” or …”Lesbian” spelled in Cyrillic. I live in a town of 3000 people. I don’t know a single gay couple living together. However!...and this is where Mongolia demonstrates its uniqueness… I don’t know anyone who dislikes gays! Its just when your not raised in an urban setting you don’t get told your allowed to express your feelings in the same way. So while I believe I know quite a few men and women (some even I consider my family) who are probably gay, they simply don’t act on their feelings. Better still many of them may very rarely act on them and then simply never tell anyone in any way. Women with jobs and no children over the age of 28 are a red flag. Guys who drink a lot and alone or in a small group of friends he always hangs out with are another likely source.

But like I said unless your in UB no one really notices. Girls dance together, boys sit in each others laps and put their hands on each others thighs…its not the same problem in America, just Mongolias own uniqueness. Luckily since Mongolians take a liberal view to all the rules of their various faiths theres no one trying to stop others from being gay because it is a sin of some kind. At least there is that!

Now in UB, yes like every other city in the world your can find your racists and bigots whose idea of a good time is annoying those who do things that make them uncomfortable. But in a country with only one town bigger than a million people their numbers remain blissfully small.

October 22, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Today was pretty boring in regards to school. I didn’t teach today, because today all Mongolian teachers get inspected by their supervisors and if one is handy an agent from the department of education. All of them used computers, got the kids to work in groups, had a thought out and well calculated plan with a convergent conclusion to what transpired. In essence, it was the most beautiful fake thing I have ever seen. It’s a REAL damn shame that we don’t have anything in regards to this type of teaching the other 300 day of the school year. Cant win em all, and in many circumstances you cant even win a few either!

If I read the signs in the store correctly, they have decided that due to the number of education and government inspectors currently in town they are not selling alcohol. I love that…can you imagine that at something like a college liquor store or bar going (you all have finals tomorrow….no booze until they are done!) Oh that’s bloody brilliant. Except of course that the ladies sell it to people anyway if they tuck it into their dells when they leave. I used it as an excuse not to drink today and instead just chilled out for tonight. Then I started watching tv.

So recently I saw an episode of Modern Family and in it one of the kids (who was the stupidest btw) outsmarted their parents in a bet. The parents renigged on their promise based on the argument “yes but we didn’t think you would actually pull that off!”

Heres one of the things I cant stand about me. ANY other person on this planet could watch something like that and not let it get any deeper into their brain past a “hehe…dumb fake parents” and move on with their uncomplicated lives.

…to me that scene was an activation word…you know, like the one sleeper agents have. And in no time I flashed back to the Spring of 1999. I was a senior in high school and my parents having finally gotten me medicated and mature enough wanted me to graduate high school. I had only just finally gotten some stability in my life for the first time….yea ever and so I wanted to remain another year. They told me to bring a teacher to see if their was any validity to my argument. I brought Mr. Doubleday, my Culinary Arts teacher. Me, Mom, Dad, Chef Teacher and two administrators. Oh it was on.

I still remember my dad not even waiting for the pleasantries. Not rude at all just said before the rounds of hello had finished “So what do we think about Josh staying here for a fifth year?” I knew the deck was against me as I was now making all A’s and my problems were more of the annoying than dangerous type…but I had my ace in the hole. I brought the teacher who went on and on for ten minutes and talked about how benefitial more time at this school would be and how I should indeed be going to a fifth year of high school.

I didn’t know it as he was saying it, but I do recall the look of everyones faces, the administrators and my mom and dad. It was sorta that dumbfounded look that the Modern Family parents had when she outsmarted them. That look of “wow…weve been flanked here.” Then my parents and administrators all thanked Mr. Doubleday and then asked him to leave. After that they did the reacharound talk. They threw out my ace in the hole and it was obvious the rest of this conversation was dedicated to getting me to change my mind and to forget that I had found the exact thing they thought I couldn’t find. It didn’t work, and I remember there came a point where they ran out of patience or just out of persuasion dialogue and went…AND I QUOTE!!!

“….yes but were going to do this anyway.”

It was one of my only known moments of actual childhood intentional insolence when I replied “So then why am I here exactly?”

…I was pissed….i was….oh I wish you knew. My parents don’t even know to this day, but I didn’t tell them how angry I was (based on some drama from the year before I kept my angry thoughts more to myself those days) basically when I realized that they were pulling the adult card on me in a life altering situation (I was 18 by the by) I just rudely dismissed myself (dad kinda scolded my tone too… which I found hilarious given the tactics in the power play they had just done) and let the four of them make my life decisions for me.

Parents don’t have social contracts…they are only as good as their conditions allow them. They only play for money if they get to win. I am so glad I realized before I had children that you just cant win being a parent. You have to be the asshole, pretty much until the end of your life, so that your kids don’t truly fuck it up. Then you gotta spin some story about how they should live out their lives and try to have a social contract and all that psycho-bullshit that we tell ourselves make us higher thought order beings. Parenting must suck a lot!

…and I got all this anger rage and ugly flashbacks from a television show that is supposed to make you feel good! What the hell is wrong with me???

…I don’t forgive them by the way. It was the right call they made and in the long run I am satisfied with how it turned out and Im not angry except in realizing that they weren’t taking me seriously and in some cases I still have my suspicions they don’t and as many of their choices for me in the long run it was probably for the best…but nope, 11 years later and I still don’t forgive either of them!

October 23, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

My ger is teeming with mice. I don’t know where their nests are, my food is all locked in a cubbard, I don’t heat my place during the day…why and where the hell are these mice staying? I need a dog or cat. Some kind of animal that occupies my home and just lets the mice know there is a new sherrif in town.

October 24, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

It came to me in a dream!!! A vodka drunkkennes induced dream but a dream no less. It came in a happy memory dream too! That’s whats so cool about this. I have been thinking of shows to show the Mongolian kids on those rough winter days in February when Tsaagen Tsar and my birthday may not give me the strongest work ethic. I needed something PG rated and not a lot of talking as they kids (or adults actually) don’t speak any English.

The flashback was a trip to a movie theatre I went to with my mother in Washington DC. It wasent a big theatre, in fact the theatre was quite a piece of garbage, because we were not seeing anything famous, we were watching the clay animation movie “Wallace and Gromit: A Close Shave” Oh that’s just perfect! Its full of words they use on a fairly regular basis and would make for an excellent lesson. Additionally, I miss that movie. I remember seeing it, mom in tow. I love how most memories of my past now only seem to be good ones or if they were bad they seem funny now. Go vodka induced dreams! Thanks for the inspiration.

Well today I am gathering up some video clips of songs and things about America as tomorrow my school has “America Day” and they want to show and act like Americans. By the way: got a riddle for ya. What city is London Bridge located in? Its not a trick question. Everyone thinks London except for annoying history geeks like myself. The one everyone thinks is London bridge is actually Tower Bridge! London Bridge was dismantled brick by brick and bought by some Amercian who reconstructed it at Lake Havasu, New Mexico. THAT’S where London bridge is, so technically an American song! Try explaining that to Mongolians!

October 25, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

My family has been asking how is ger life now that it is around 5 degrees Fahrenheit at night. Its one of those times that I tell them the truth that this is not hard and aside from keeping a good fire going at night sleeping in this ger at the moment is not that different from how I have been living the last year. Actually my living arrangement carries with it a great deal more perks. In my apartment I was on the top floor and everyone I knew never came by first of all because my apartment sucked so bad it didn’t even have a bathtub or hot water and also my neighbors sorta expected me to go to them uninvited. A detailed explanation to my neighbors from Peace Corps did not help either. No internet sorta made me a shut in as well.

Now I live in a yard with a family I interact with on a daily basis and the majority of my time outside my ger is me working at school with the other teachers as the school is the most heated building in this town.

So yea, at present life here in the ger of Bagakhangai is tough but good…and I am aware its gonna get a whole hell of a lot tougher. The cold I am experiencing now I could handle standing on my head. Now granted, I have a high tolerance of cold pain but if its anything like the winter last year yea this is gonna get bad! Nothing for it, itll make the snow grainier and the snot in your nose freeze…buckle up! Ill take a picture if the vodka I have freezes.

The other thing that already solidifies at night and settles back but will stay solidified in about a month is the outhouse pile. You see, when its impressively freezing non stop (as it will be for over three months) when you go to the bathroom your droppings build and build off each other because it freezes to the previous waste before it can reach the bottom. Creating the eloquently titled….shitcicle! Is it not amazing what you learn living in a ger?

So today is technically American day in the school system. I was asked to play some American music. I dug up some classics like “Hail Columbia” “We Didn’t Start the Fire” and “Bonnie Blue Flag” I really have no idea how I got to be so gullible that I thought those would be played. They all screamed GA GAG GAGAGAGA!!!!! And after giving up I let them listen to Michael Jackson and Lady Gaga.

Not the lesson I would have done, but hey I guess I should be grateful they like something about America. “The evolution of Dance” was at least not booed off instantly (It lasted one minute)

October 26, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Ah, tonights dinner is baked potatoes. Im saving up a little money as I promised to make Sarangoo and anyone else who drops by Friday night pizza. By the following week I get next months monthly pay and can grab some more cash, so I need to save money now so I can spend it on Friday. Its funny to think that when you “save up” living in New York that means you spend less than 20 or so dollars a day. Here “save up” is around 75 cents a day, and a day where I blow all my money is around seven dollars. A beer at your bar is what it costs me to buy cheese/tomato sauce/ enough vodka to get astronomically drunk and a coke brand coke along with enough left over to buy three cans of beans.

Go Mongolia go!....okay im a little starved/delusional here and I need these potatoes to boil quicker.

October 27, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

So Esther is really gone now. Her last text was at Chinngis Khan Airport headed back to Hong Kong. Her old job awaiting her, an adventure of a lifetime under her belt. I gotta say this is by far the healthiest relationship with a woman I have ever had. Certain people read this blog so I wont go into detail but the reasoning behind why this relationship was so healthy as opposed to others ive had actually fuels my concept of love quite well. This was solely a physical relationship with an absolute whiff of emotion. I think I came to an understanding how if you don’t believe in love it must be quite easy to satisfy oneself.

Have I really turned into that guy from the failed show “Life” Love one that way and then go have all the mad fun you ever could with anyone else interested? Based on what I just did I imagine that would be nice, but for some reason I imagine women would not be so inclined to such a setup and that’s where things turn ugly. Esther might have been a one of a kind/perfect storm type setup. No matter, its over and I truly feel better having had her in my life for the time that she was regardless of what lessons I ultimately pull from all of this.

I imagine ill be getting rather cranky in the next month or so going through withdrawal from a rather enjoyable setup I had with Esther, but the most important part of learning from this relationship is going to be truly and happily letting go of a good thing that I knew was not going to last. The cold will help…

October 28, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

And then there was cranberry juice. This is getting a little scary. You see, a month ago a new brand of Mongolian made and manufactured juice was on the shelves. Its served in a cardboard carton instead of a plastic bottle (easier to burn) and is slightly cheaper than the Minute Maid stuff like orange juice. Additionally, the new Bio orange juice didn’t have any pulp, it was like pouring the painless sun down my throat and reawakening to the bliss of citrus.

So for the last month ive been on a bit of an orange juice bender. A carton a day is the average going rate. Yet today I had drank the orange juice dry because today it was not orange juice…its cranberry juice. I looked at the box and had a great flashback to none other than my 2nd alma matter Fordham University. I think the retired Jesuits have a bladder infection or something because the only juice the school serves is cranberry. So I am now gonna drink the hard berry down. I swear these flavors sorta scare me. I didn’t realize how much I missed them till I started having them in quantities and qualities that I have of late. Its just tastes…so…fucking…good. How the hell did I not appreciate stuff like this before???? I apologize for swearing, just trying to make a point that this really was a true joy to have to drink.

…also it means I can turn vodka and that garbage grapefruit/medley flavor juice into seabreezes…by far the gayest drink I could ever concoct…so instead ill just chug vodka and then take an equal swig of cranberry juice. I got to start making some wine again! Good thursday…good thursday. I swear I really am teaching all these days too!

October 29, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Ugly day, better evening. It was one of those days in which I got to see just how fully I am being utilized around here. Theres something here called “English Olympiad” Basically it’s a chance for everyone who wants a shot at saving some money to go to college in UB by winning a contest like this to write an essay on a theme and submit it. The theme was “books of our times”

As I mentioned before, my town through some gerrymandering got shoved into the UB aimag, meaning when we compete even regionally were going up against kids who lived in cosmopolitian city and get a good grasp of English from a very early age. Meanwhile my quaint little town has an army of people aged 3-18 who all only say “hello” to me and I am pretty sure most of them don’t know what that means exactly. Not stretching that either.

Okay, so the kids who try for these things are gonna crash and burn right? Not a problem, still by all means try. This is where the first aspect of the Mongolian education system kicks up and the kids all cheat. Not American cheat either where they write cram notes on a water bottle label or something, no these kids found an English book about book history and word for word wrote it down on a piece of paper.

My counterpart Sarangoo told me to type up what they wrote. I asked why they could not do so in the towns computer lab and was told that they don’t know how to type and the papers were due at the end of today and that they knew I was good at typing. Lets review, they copied verbatim from a book they did not understand a word of, and then they were going to have me type it so they could submit it on their own behalf…

…

TO DEMONSTRATE THEIR ENGLISH LANGUAGE SKILLS!!!!

…

This is again where I have been called on not to do just stupid work, not even fake work….ive been asked to do someone elses fake stupid cheating work! I think at this part of the day I was not having a stellar time and I was getting a little cranky. I don’t think I had eaten a lot and I have been running all week and I sorta just wanted out of their so I sat down and typed up the first plagiarized writing they put before me. Another girl showed up and asked me to do the same with her plagiarized writing. This girl had selected a piece by an old professor who remarked about how he can remember first touching a book and realizing that someone they didn’t know was in contact with them in a most intimate way. The twelve year old girl in front of me couldn’t pronounce the words she had written down let alone understand their meaning.

It was the third kid that made me lose it. I was

Rusty...Old...Abandoned in my own yard and still daunting....

BOMBS!!!!!

With one days notice here i am in my town about to run an Ultramarathon...i love the Peace Corps, and its "anything around the corner" style to life!!!!

Introducing 5 time Marathon and 1 time ULTRAMARATHON MAN!!! Over 50km...more than 30 miles...yea, you rest there Josh!

Me and my new counterpart Sarangoo. We rock in our formalwear...but were both jeans teachers. Go us!

Go Teacher Dude Go!! You may notice my students are a tad younger this year! I like that, were more age appropriate to me now!

This first video is just proof that while i dont always talk about it in my blog i am in fact teaching English. Now granted most lessons are far more boring than this but still!!!!

I SO.... did not make this video! Only a complete and total loser with nothing but free time and Imovie software could make something as geeky as this!

Okay, if you havent seen the movie the climax requires explaination.

-Its green man vs blue man.

-Green girl fell in love with blue man (traitor!)

-Green guys in love with her and royally pissed.

-She has a dagger in her chest.

-Green guys got a dagger and is ready to kill blue man.

-Green girl can use the dagger to block or to kill but if she pulls it out it kills her.

-Blue man is walking towards Green Man so she cant stop the dagger in time and therefore wont pull her dagger out and die....wild fun.

What a loser the guy (or girl) who made this must have been!

September 1, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Were back baby!!!” –Bender Bending Rodriguez

So after a summer schedule crammed with hot girls, Naadam festivals, long car rides, wild horses, marathons, and just about every factor that would keep me from being able to sit down each day and type up my comings and goings in this crazy little life of mine, I find myself here on the first day of school at the end of a long day and realize that the summer came to an end at the perfect time.

I yearn for my boredom and routine after a summer without any. Were all moved into the ger and life and therefore this blog will likely return to me talking about potatoes and annoying kids. Ah…life is good. By the by how cool was that last blog entry of mine? I seriously believe I have outdone myself on that one.

So today was the first day of school…again. It was strange to go through the opening ritual yet again. I got out my blue dress shirt, charged the camera and bright and early at 8am I arrived at my school….and waited for an hour while everyone late showed up. Totally saw it coming, and they gave me some airag to drink this time as well. Kick ass.

The ceremony a second time around was a lot more enjoyable. I understood everything that was being said this time and I knew what was coming up. This school operates a little different than the one at Ondortolge. That school gets both towns 10th and 11th graders while Bagkhangai takes all the kids from 1st-4th grade. I imagine it has to do with this school being centrally heated and better insulated or perhaps its just the way it is. Anyway that means that my English classes are going to have to be REALLY basic. Yet now that I think about it that could be an even better thing. Less pressure about tests and more time just trying to talk and speak. Heck the 1st-4th graders are the only ones who talk to me anyway in town…this could be really good.

So we did the ceremony and then the rest of the day is a “field day” so to speak and I was delegated the task of refereeing the soccer games. I really don’t know why they have this role. The kids make their own teams and call their own fouls. Actually the only time I made a ruling everyone got pissed at me so I spent the day basically watching bad soccer….worse ways to spend a nice day. Wont be able to waste a day outside like that for much longer.

The internet at the school is also top notch. Wireless and T1. Well, usually has internet anyways. Far faster and more reliable than the internet that was up about once a month for an hour or so on a single computer at about a 5kbps speed. Yea, its all relative.

My stores sell beans too…seriously if I learned how to make pizza I may never leave. Actually I will need to leave one final time before I consider myself finally “back” as next Monday I go to the wedding of my former sitemate Tripp. That’s gonna be a blast as ive never been to the Mongolian wedding, and apparently these things make all other Mongolian drinking habits look quite tame. Tuesday will be a little more sobering as I will be going to the dentist at long last. Not gonna like that I can tell. I never get out of a dentists office without some new cavities moving in. What the hell? I brush twice a day and I eat about a 1/10th as much candy as I used to. Common teeth! Well a necessary pain now to avoid other pain later. And you know, when better to go than hungover right? So I wrap those two events up and then return to my town where the next time ill probably shuffle around will be the consolidation drill we all do sometime in October.

Ive been like…here here… for over a year now. Egad!

Oh! One final thing I did today that will be just one of many new little chores I will take part in because I now live in a ger. I did a water run/sit. You see, as a ger resident I am required to get my water from a well. Yep, back to the 18th century for me! Well the well only operates at certain hours, and the whole community brought out there buckets and whatnot to get their ration of water. My 30 liter container paled in comparison to some of the drums I saw rolling around. It did involve an hour sitting around with the kids of my community (lugging water is a kid chore, kinda like mowing the lawn or something that doesn’t happen here) We made some great water container drum music and the scene of all of us in line for water will make a great picture the next time I remember to bring my camera.

Good times…day by day the days will unfold…WERE BACK BABY!

September 2, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Ah schools back. School is also easy. First week, no pressures, general introductions, things like that. The kids are definitely a fan of me and now that I have Mongolian on my tongue this is going to be SO much easier than last year. Its also easier because I have learned how to relax a little as compared to how I was feeling last year. Today I got bombarded for language clubs and I whipped those up like I had been expecting it all year (I had) The language clubs will inevitably die out as every English club I have ever had has before when people realize that just showing up does not instantly mean you learn to speak English….they are now the inexperienced ones. Tables turned indeed.

So there is construction workers just outside my school. They will be there for the remainder of my time here in Mongolia as they are constructing an additional school here in Bagkhangai. It will be done by the same Japanese grant that made the first one and will therefore be one of the best additions this town has had since the last one as well.

The teachers all asked me to go camping with them back in Terelj and I was majorly bummed to tell them all I was going to Tripps wedding and so I couldn’t go. Bummed out indeed. As always just too many things id like to be doing at the same time.

After school today I went out running yet again. I haven’t blogged about the last 4 days but ive run 3-5 miles each day now after a summer of almost no running at all after the marathon at the start of June. My legs may be reminding me that I have been negligent, but I am still up and about. Kicking ass in the running department with no more difficulty than if I had taken the weekend off. Gods I love my body!

I figure this habit of good food/exercise/rest will continue on until the cold kicks in sometime in October or so and then the “normal” pattern life shine will begin to wear off as do all things after so long, but right now lets just enjoy the basic and the simple. I am happy, and its not like I have to work to maintain this. Socrates talked about how humble people or impoverished people had found a most unique way. “Sparks no envy, free to any who wish it and only improves with neglect.” I may not be poor, but I get the idea and think its adaptable.

September 3, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Teaching is fun! Granted its week 1. The kids are sitting down, shutting up and NOT hitting each other and my counterpart and I are both recharged and ready to teach but today I took the kids through a fun medley of “There are seven days in a week” and it all happened so easily. Ah…now that’s the kind of teaching I am aiming for all year. Maybe I work better with kids than teens. Teens need law, kids need inspiration. Something like that right? As I said, we class clowns of youth may make great teachers we make the absolute worst classroom managers.

Tomorrow I head into what I REALLY want to be the last trip I make to UB in a LONG time. I somehow doubt that my package from home will have arrived (if it has been sent) The good news is that my gaming experience has diversified significantly since I moved to Bagkhangai. One of the greatest video games ever created: Ultima VII: The Black Gate has a module that allows it to play on my mac WITH SOUND! I didn’t have that with even the best PC module. Score one for Mac geeks!

Still, either waiting to be shipped, sitting at PC office or lost in China somewhere out there is a video game with my name on it. Starcraft II. Better still with my new internet connection I could even play people like my brother Russell in it at some point. I love that. Were brotherly adult siblings and instead of talking with the newfound internet he and I will blast at one another with video games….Freud would have a field day he really would!

Its been a great week of getting back to the simple life. No booze, great undisturbed sleep, 5 mile daily runs…seriously so long as I get that run in I really can take anything life throws my way. Ill be off the running course for the next four days but ive been doing it for five in a row. Im sure ill get it back quicker when I return.

Hey btw, with this newfound internet I looked up a lot regarding blogs from PCV’s not in Mongolia. Next time i join PC (an option in a year btw) I am going to apply either for Eastern Europe or the Caribbean or Pacific Islands. I realized reading those how much I miss a real beach or food that is good and flavorful in all conditions. Those areas seem to have that (note: Once again be clear you don’t get to “pick” where your assigned when you join Peace Corps and this is a dream sequence were talking bout here…just checking)

Oh, final note. Its Friday, which means for the first time in over two months I have spent a full week back at my site. Which sucks because I have to leave tomorrow for the wedding. Seriously if a wedding was not involved I would find an excuse not to go. Its felt really good to be back. The five mile runs, the same bed each night. People I recognize and know, a job and I have even been sober for the last week as I am away from the Gem beer tent outside the state department store in UB. All last year during the school year, despite extreme boredom I did find a way somehow to not buy alcohol during the weekday and only drank when offered by someone else at a party or something. In my second year I hope to carry on that tradition, mostly because I just hate the taste of the stuff. How the hell did that happen?

My brother and Dad both like the stuff (usually with tonic or a chaser but still) my sister would drink it if she ever didn’t drink diet coke and my mom…come to think of it I literally have no memories or visions of my mother drinking anything except like wine on Thanksgiving. I am most certain she has but that’s weird I can remember everyone else in my family drinking like fish. Responsible fish but fish none the less! Anyways the point is that I am really the only person in my immediate family who I think really does not like Vodka at all under any circumstances (ill be sure to bring a few bottles of Chinngis home to my brother and father, that’s a couple gifts right off the list right there. Im thinking of getting my dad an eagle for a gift too. They only cost around $200,000 for a license and dad could use it to hunt rabbits or squirrels or whatever eats at his gardens veggies…whatcha think, good idea?) I figure Eric my stepfather could use a warbow (he can hang it above the Mac Plus) and mom gets whatever she tells me she wants from this country.

…Anyway im talking about alcohol…

So while sober on the week it is a Friday and so for the first time in a week I went to the shop to buy some booze. I came across an interesting discovery and revelation that I had yet to buy vodka in Bagkhangai and so I examined the shelf. The brand of vodka I have drank for the last year called “Erroll” (sorry I cant type in Cyrillic on this computer) has gone up 100 tugriks. This not only means that they are abusing the inflation, but they have also no longer a well rounded number for the price of vodka which had been the 4,500 Tugriks ($3.50 for 3/4th a liter of vodka, good gods this country of mine!) Well I looked to the right in this store and low and behold they actually had a choice of vodkas to pick from that were all mid shelf! So looking at the next price tag I saw that the new vodka I will be drinking is called “Terguun” I gave it a swig while watching a movie tonight and it tasted distinctly different. I don’t mean that I like it, actually it tasted quite awful as do all vodkas I drink taste like but it had a distinctly different flavor from the previous vodka. There not flavored, and since its vodka I am a little curious how that happens where it tastes different. I bet I could hike to the school, google this information and someone could give me a complete and logical explaination… or I could take a few more shots, forget what I had been thinking about and fall asleep! Ah, life is really really good.

September 8, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

I tell ya, am I ever gonna get to spend a full week in my soum ever again? The trip to UB was one both of chores and of fun…and a touch of toothache.

So I get in to UB and head to my usual guesthouse on Saturday. Not bad, except they don’t have hot water. Getting a little tired of this and my hairs getting a little too bushy not to wash it on at least a monthly basis (relax, it get soaked when I live at my site)

I text around and find a guesthouse that a lot of PCV’s frequent that even has rooms for the beds so me and Esther could spend a few nights without everyone else around. I book the place down for Sunday Monday and Tuesday. Then I do some chores like buying a mouse for my computer (ive come into some new video games) and I did a load of laundry. The rest of Saturday was what I always do in Mongolia, alcohol, friends, and American Burgers and Fries.

That last one needs some explaining, and needs to be experienced to be believed. So eight of so months ago an American (of Mongolian ancestry) was growing up in Northern Virginia. Wait for it…he attended ROBINSON HIGH SCHOOL!!!! I obviously didn’t know this about him until recently, but the minute we met it was apparent that our accents were that (white boy with an international audience and teachers) type sound. When I later told him that I was a teacher at that school he reacted as all students would in that situation “Get the hell out of my place!” (joke folks)

He had a dream… and I gotta say his was a little more practical and useful than some other peoples dreams (myself included) He came back to Mongolia and set up shop near the center of town selling fries and burgers. Not burgers like all other tourist restaurants though. He buys his beef from cows raised by a Canadian in Hovsgul and gets charged accordingly for getting the meat that actually makes an American burger taste like a burger. Though he was open in the spring it was not until this summer that we PCV’s have really invaded the place. So every time you drop in you inevitably meet other volunteers and the usual fun ensues.

Sunday I moved over to the other guesthouse, and as the guesthouse is a block from the state department store where all the beer tents used to be I was saddened to see that they were in the process of being dismantled. Summer is indeed reached its end. Esther though made for a decent distraction, and we spent Sunday doing the catch up thing and eating and drinking incessantly.

Monday was Tripps wedding. I had coordinated that Esther, I and a fellow volunteer named Lindsay would take a cab out together, and when we arrived a short and fast talking host walked us into the ballroom where the party was taking place. The layout is what you expect in a Mongolian wedding. Bride and groom up front, and the closest members of each of their families branching off from them. We walk in…and theres no other gringos in the room…and the chair next to Tripp is empty. I figured id be quickly seated at some distant sattelite table with a view of the bathroom, instead I sat directly next to Tripp, looking quite snazzy in my getup btw.

The wedding was going great until the best man (whose me! Tripp told me NONE of this) had to give a speech. What the hell? I don’t have enough elegant Mongolian for this. Now luckily Tripps bride Mongontuya translated and I quickly retreated to English. It was your typical. “I met the two of you, you were an instant match, I can think of noone better together” (obvious paraphrasing) Then I finished on this “I wish you both good health, a long time together, and of course many children.” She translated this and everyone goes into a gasp.

Mentally I ran down the list of ways in which you can jinx or curse a Mongolian, and could think of nothing. Two hours later I find out FOR THE FIRST TIME that Mongontuya is three months pregnant…and yes it is INSANE bad luck to wish someone a happy child while she is still expecting. You don’t even really talk about a pregnant woman once shes knocked up. I looked over at Tripp menacingly and he had his typical smile and composure of a man of extreme competence looking at a man sorely lacking in this. Ah Tripp…worry not, id never harm a man on his wedding day, even one as sinister as you for setting this up.

I forgot my camera but Esther had hers and gave me her pictures. The pictures don’t do this justice, you sorta just gotta be a part of this to understand. BTW: for a few moments Tripp divulged the cost of a wedding as swanky as his in Mongolian. An eloping in Vegas with an Elvis impersonator costs five times as much! Score one for marrying out of country.

The next day we nursed our hangovers…actually no I didn’t. At 8:00am I had my dentist visit. They hadn’t bothered to contact me about it all summer (a quote from our med guy Paul: “Let me take care of that”) but the minute I did they made an appointment for Tuesday and so they went to work. I hate dentists. I could brush and floss until the world ran out of string and I would still get cavities. Weak teeth and a love for sugar I suppose. Nothing in my mouth hurt, but I knew after a year there was no way I was getting out of that office free. She shuffled around and found the guilty teeth. Two of em side to side. She also took a look at my old fillings a lot and made a lot of barking noises at the woman taking notes behind me. Teeth wise I have a high tolerance for pain so while it sucked I just sat there while she drilled and patched away. Couple hours later she was done, and my teeth had that annoying -your still numb but under the numbness you still feel the pain thing. She finally revealed she wanted to see me two more times. She wanted to replace four of my old fillings. Gods I love dentists. So the next time they can fit me in is the following Friday and Saturday. Oh wee! More UB time.

The afternoon I do my med exam with Paul our doc. It was pretty damn comical:

“Do you drink?”

“Only to excess sir!”

“Real funny Starbuck.” (he knew the Battlestar Galactica quote)

Others followed but you sorta had to be there to get the back and forth of it. Anyways he finishes his line of questions and just sorta looks at me bored and goes: “So how do you feel?” I tell him fine and so he offers to test me for anything I want. Quite different from the American health care system huh? Basically he said after giving me a brisk physical that if I want tests for anything that wouldn’t show up from that he could, but he put me down near the nonexistent percentage for most of them. I asked if he would make the same offer at my Close of Service and when he said yes I agreed he didn’t need to do any specific testing. Healthy living, genetic lineage and neurotic mothers have given me the armor to survive and thrive in the rough world.

So it was a long medical day and on Wednsday I could finally return to site. I was bringing back something from Peace Corps office that I had been waiting for. My package from my mother had arrived, and inside. Starcraft II!!!!!! Obviously the rest of my night is booked so excuse me…. Fun days in UB…and im back in less than a week for more drilling and scraping. You know at some point this school year id love to teach.

September 9th, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

So here is a funny thing. I sorta looked around at all the things in my yard today. While I moved here in the middle of July logistically ive spent only three or so weeks in this ger. My ger sorta sits in the middle of it and in typical Haasha fashion there is a small summer shack where my haasha family sleeps and lives and an outhouse near the right corner. A few oil drums for garbage and that’s it.

Yet today I was playing with the puppies. My hashaa family has a dog who just gave birth to nine puppies. I am looking into a period of time when I can inquire if for a year I can keep one for a pet. One of the little pups runs over to a pile of scrap metal near the outhouse. I had seen this stuff day in and day out but like all rusting metal in the countryside it just sorta blends in. I pulled one of the piece up to get to where the dog was…and realized just what this was a scrap piece of.

I should have known these were somewhere. We are on the remains of an air force base after all and while you can fly your fighters back theres just gonna be way too many things that they cant take away. But I realized right then and there what I was holding. I was holding a bomb. Not explosives, but the outer shell of an honest to Joseph Smith bomb that gets dropped from planes high high above. I imagine it was simply them removing the valuable explosives bit and just not being willing to drag the heavy casing back with them.

They even had the stabilizing propeller in the back and all. So there you have it ladies and gentlemen. In my yard, next to the outhouse…I have a half dozen or so bombs just laying around. What do you all have? A rake? HAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Oh yea, class was fine today. Good students…good school year…bombs in my yard.

Late night addition: Moogi just sent me a text about something happening tomorrow. Your not gonna believe this…I wont even believe this till I see it either.

September 10, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Last night was going so well. I had just finished typing the blog. I had the great photos of the bombs, a good cup of milk tea with the haasha family and I was locked in a battle of Starcraft II. It was all going so utterly well.

Then at 9pm I get a text from Moogi. “Josh, do you run in ultramarathon?” I obviously thought back to what I assumed was this countries only ultramarathon which is at Lake Hovsgul in July and so I said no I missed it. She replies “No the ultramarathon in Bagkhangai.”

What’s this? They plan on having an ultramarathon in this town? Seriously? Granted I had not been as active of a runner this summer given my beer and vacation habits but I figured with a month or two I could probably at least run a regular marathon. I say hellz yes and ask for the date.

….

…

…”tomorrow morning”…

…

…

I AM NOT MAKING THIS UP!!!

How in the hell did Moogi wait until the night before to tell me this town had any races planned let alone an ultramarathon? The race is practically in 10 hours now!!!!

Well, im in I guess.

I run to my cupboard and start craming every piece of protein I can find down my throat. I also drink a liter and a half of water with a Vitamin C enhancement pack as well.

I haven’t run past ten miles in over two months! I ran lightly the last two weeks, but were not even talking my standard marathon either!!! I spent that night really stretching out, knowing I would need to walk this and that if my muscles weren’t limber enough I was in for a curl up.

I got to sleep quickly but far too soon it was time to get up and stretch and drink again. I took the shuttle to Ondortolge where the race was starting, and was taken aback by just how many people were running. There were over a 100 people running the ultramarathon. That’s twice the amount that ran the UB marathon! The course lengths were as followed. You could run the 3km run, which a lot of my town and even students did. The next length was 50km. That’s 8km more than a regular marathon. (its over 30 miles!) and the final “ultramarathon” was 100k. I probably shoulda played it safe and just sprinted the 3k….but im afraid you guys by now probably know my policy about half assed things.

I signed up for the 50km. After the summer and the lack of prep time I knew I didn’t stand a chance running 100km in one day. The town did its usual horse violin/girl dancing performances before the race set off. I took a few quick photos. I told Moogi she could have my computer if I die when I handed her my cell phone and keys. She grinned a little too widely when she said “OK!” and I suddenly then recalled that Moogi had left me in the dark about this for so very long. Id complain more but by the time I could stretch a little more someone fired off a rocket and the race was on.

I am writing all of this fast, but its not even because I am in a rush, but that the time up to the race happened in the blink of an eye to me. Usually when I run marathons it’s the months/day leading up to the marathon that last forever. Then the actual 4-5 hours or running time breezes right by (especially because of the training preparing me for the race too!) With this it was all one thing after another.

The overwhelming majority of the people who had on running bibs seemed to be signed up to run 100km. The degree of “in shapeness” varied considerably. Some people looked like walking muscles, and others were middle aged mothers who were smoking prior to the start of the race. As the race went on matters would clarify. The people who orchestrated this race were from UB. You could tell the pack runners because that’s what they did…ran in a pack. It was 20 or so guys, definitely military. They weren’t running out and back like us either. They were just going to run from here all the way to Sukbaatar Square in the center of UB (about 100km away) very practical using our town as a starting grid huh? For the non military or the 50k runners it was an out and back course. Saved on water stations I suppose.

We started the run with the Mongolians all blazing a trail. I was the only foreigner running the 50k or 100k in this race. Actually I was the only non-Mongolian here period (check out the starting line photo…everywhere I go in Asia I always stand out like a tree among flowers!) Better still, I was the only LOCAL who was running one of the ultramarathons! How cool is that, im a foreigner, but im the local boy….gods I love Peace Corps, and gods I love this country.

So the running track went the way I hoped it would. It ran on the path I used to train for the marathon back in June. The problem is they screwed up the math of kilometers. Every 2 kilometers on the main road is a counter of how far you are from Sukbaatar Square in UB. Their count of how many kilometers we had run were WAY off…and they weren’t shorting up their screw up either. I am pretty sure we ran over 60 kilometers to finish the race.

Well the first half of the marathon was basically me trailing further and further behind the bulk of the runners. I recognized the people running though. They may have been strong, like almost all Mongolians I know but they had never run long distances before. I imagine they thought strength would bring them through. Strength is a wonderful thing, but to those of us who have run five marathons can tell you that strength will only take you as far as your stamina can.

I may have been behind everyone in the first 25 kilometers, but by the time it was the turnaround point I could see the Mongolians dropping. Some were trying to stretch their woefully overworked muscles (all that strength huh…) but others had truly just lay flat on the road waiting for a medic. My jog may have been pathetic in the beginning, but I was the only one I could see still jogging after 30 kilometers (the people truly in shape running the 100km were well out of site by that point)

I was aware of just how few of the people with 100km bibs were not even going to finish 50km let alone 100km. I had forgotten the degree to which Mongolians can be overly ambitious. No matter to me, but as I reached the 40km water station I was starting to hurt. I had dropped to a walk 5km earlier and while relatively I hadn’t worked out much this summer id been in shape long and hard enough that while I didn’t have a specific pain my whole body was hurting. My feet were particularly tired of pounding pavement.

With the big open expanse of Mongolia as our backdrop and it never really appearing to change all that much there were periods of time where I believed I may be reenacting that scene from the “Tripplettes of Bellville” where a machine has been developed to watch as I trot along while others bet upon which kilometer it is I drop dead from. Running can give you a dry sense of humor I suppose.

At 40km this is usually the conclusion of a conventional marathon. On this day though I have another 10k to go. Ive run 5 marathons before and never once did I finish a race and think (boy another 10k would rock right now!) but that’s what had to be done. The last 10k went beyond pain to more dangerous things. My body was past just giving me pain indicators and was at the point where it starts to change my anatomy. Its sorta like your brain and body going “okay I am no longer sending you warning signs that your stressing yourself too far. Instead what you will see differently is going to be so that you stay alive while you finish doing whatever the hell this is!”

I felt it when I picked up a cup of water to drink. My hands felt a little numb, and on a more serious note when I looked at my hands I swore they were four times thicker than they usually are. My fingers and whole hands were clubbing up. Additionally came the eyesight flashes. While there are not a lot of cars driving on the road I did start to see the world in different tinges for long stretches of time. I remember the colors purple and blue specifically. Finally despite only walking during the last 5 kilometers the top of my chest was starting to feel like it was being squeezed. It meant that my lungs were giving up too. In essence I am pretty sure that if I were not under 30, not as well exercised over the past 5 years or trying to run any farther than the 50/60kilometers I had run today I probably would have given myself a heart attack, but luckily as I staggered the final few kilometers across the air force base I reached the finish line.

I just ran an ultramarathon of over 30 miles….That was pretty damn ninja!

No medals (they give 4 year olds medals in this country for competing in English competitions when they cant speak English!) but I got the running big which shows I run 50km and I got a shirt saying it was in Bagkhangai that we ran the ultramarthon man. So I guess I could now label myself 5 time marathon man and one time ultramarathoner…but I think well just add it to the other marathons and make me 6 time marathon man! JOSH JACOBS

Seriously, they teach you when you join Peace Corps to be ready for anything this job throws at ya….didnt see that one.

Okay, now excuse me I need to eat 500grams of protein and sleep 50 years. I imagine tomorrow ill be so sore ill never again stand up.

September 11, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Well, it hurts. Just not the type of pain I had in mind. Yesterday, with less than a days notice I ran 50 kilometers. I got a plastic bib and a t-shirt for my trouble. Totally worth it! Upon waking up I looked over my feet to check for any blisters that have grown. None did. Too many years of running have calloused my feet. I remember the six months in the Spring of 2004 when I was finally getting into shape for the first time in my life. Running in sneakers, 50 pounds overweight, new at it. My toes each night were teeming with blisters. Now luckily with the proper shoes and a good tie they almost never blister, and so the only pain from my feet was a minor ache.

It was my thighs that stung so much. I imagined it came from too much exertion, but as I inspected closely I realized the pain wasent coming from muscle, it came from the skin. Running all day in essentially a speedo in the Mongolian sun had exposed my pale upper thighs, and now they REALLY burned. That was my greatest pain after a 50/60k run…sunburn. If it didn’t hurt so much id laugh harder. I got some more burn on my neck and back too, but I think it’s the legs that will take the pain for the next few days. Luckily the race was on a Saturday so I have the weekend to recuperate. I think in one of my bags there is probably IB profin.

September 12, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Im still trying to type in that I live in Ondortolge every time I title a blog date. Not that it matters as I hardly am ever not at this town or at Ulaanbaatar, but still you get the idea. Today the sunburn pain receeded and instead I just find myself all around sore. I am finding it cooler and cooler with each passing second that I was capable of running over 50 kilometers without even a sufficient buildup of training. Go me.

BTW: I forgot to put down yesterday that I have now been in the Peace Corps for 15 months. G.M. Chrysler!!!! Longest I was ever out of the country before this was less than half a year on a beach and at a Buddhist temple in Southeast Asia. Nothing half assed, that I most certainly can stress!

The ger is still working out great. The early part of September this year is bringing back flash memories of last year where this was the calm before the storm. I was still clean, full of zeal, and the weather was still merciful. Its all coming back, and I am well aware of that, its just amusing how much more confidence you have in life after living somewhere for a year.

I spent the day finishing the Human campaign on Starcraft II and then reading my Star Wars Book. I liked it, and it broke the mold of the previous books set 40 years AFTER A New Hope Now this series which goes on about the Old Republic is set four thousand years BEFORE A New Hope happened. New people and characters, new philosophies and when I envision these people I don’t have to imagine what Mark Hamill or Harrison Ford would look like when he is 70.

In another years time, I will have a metric ton of books that I don’t want to bother with lugging back to the states. Most will be out in paperback by that time anyway. Some M22 or M21 who bribes me well enough is going to come across this cache at the Peace Corps library next summer and think they died and went to Sci-Fi heaven. Good books they are too. Problem is I only really have one final book coming out for me. It’s Vortex and it comes out in December, and the next book in the series wont be out until I conclude my time in Peace Corps. Wow, having a series to follow really does make the months roll by.

School is back up tomorrow, but as I don’t teach on Tuesday or Wednesday and I leave for more dentist work on Thursday and Friday I will say that this week is pretty damn slow like the last one was as well. Its sorta like the swine flu break of last fall, only a little earlier and instead it’s a series of badly timed appointments.

Im off to bed, life is so cool is it not?

September 13, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

Okay, so hear me out on this one. Back on December 31, 2009 I made a promise to myself. I swore up and down that for one lousy year of my life I was NOT going to worry about anything that happened further down the road. That I would spend a year where here and now was all there was.

Its been nine or so months and ive done that. Its been wonderful to have so little to concern myself over. Its scary and freightening to have been away from steady news sources so long and so often that I would once a month find out what new politicians were dead and what new reform bills had been passed. Yet it also has been empowering to realize that I know exactly as much as I truly need to know. It’s the power of freedom ladies and gentlemen, and I have been exploring the sensation for a while now.

I still haven’t broken my promise, but today with the internet at my command I went to the Peace Corps website and came across something I had long forgotten about. One thing that Peace Corps volunteers have as a perk after service is the option to apply to a number of fellowships at colleges and universities across the states. Some masters, some even doctorates in things like Public Policy. Its an application for a fellowship which means that if I wanted to pick back up where I had left life behind in the Spring of 2009 then I need to have gathered the appropriate materials and have applied by Jan. 1, 2011. That’s three or so months away.

Whatcha think everyone? I have two masters degrees, one in Education and one in Modern European History. Would a doctorate in something like Public Policy be up my street? Think about it. First off, ….Dr. Jacobs. We already got a few non medicine doctoral holders in my family already. Be nice to fit in to that group. If I sorta buried myself in school and work I could probably have the doctorate by the time I reach 35, giving me more than enough time to then apply it to a career.

A doctorate in something like Public Policy coupled with the previous Higher Education/Residential Life experience and spooled in the teaching I have done would probably set me up for good with some type of high advancement job in volunteer work organizations. Spend my autumn years just working and helping till age finally catches up to me.

…it sounds like an amazing life.

I could do it you know… with my degrees, my health, my lack of debt, my ability to adapt to pretty much any enviorment you put me in I could be one of the best administrators of a US government assistance organization out there…

Is that the one I want?

Do I want to go to that Kibbutz in Israel?

Do I want to go back into Residential Life at Higher Education?

Do I want to just teach?

Do I want to search out community colleges to teach at?

Do I want to join the Peace Corps again?

Do I just want to keep traveling the world, finding out that if theres no end to the world then I should try to explore all of it that I can?

…its that scene in the book Traitor. I can think until the end of time and it will do nothing. I have to choose and act don’t i?

You cant go into exile forever can you?

You can go, be in it, even enjoy it for quite a while, but sooner or later life catches up to you and you have to answer your own question…

Who am i?

….AAAUUGGGHH!!!! This is why I promised myself I wouldn’t think about this until 2011. But still I need some advice. Ill enquire with some of the people I often seek council from. Ill also make a trip to the Country Director we now have. We met at MST, and she seemed to have a lot of sagely advice on people at crossroads.

…oh yea, the rest of the day went fine. I think ill start lightly trying to jog again tomorrow. A good three days rest with plenty of Orange Juice has done me very well.

September 14, 2010

Out of boredom and egotism I have submitted myself for consideration as the Volunteer of the Month award thing the newsletter is advertising. Better still it brought to my attention that they are looking for videos on a Peace Corps competition about my “My Piece of the Peace Corps” and naturally I have gone straight to work on that as well. Unlike the Volunteer of the Month award thing, I could actually win money if the video does well. It’s a rather exciting start to a second year I will say!

Tuesdays and Wednesdays are weird schedule days for me. You see, the 10th and 11th graders this year are on an experimental program where they are sent to Ondortolge to study with the other graders as theres only a handful of them here. As a result I only teach little kids this year. So just to review last year I worked pretty much as a TEFL and now as I work only with little kids I am technically a PT Primary Teacher. I would like it kept fresh in everyones minds that I technically still am a Teacher Trainer! Ill let you know when I do something about that.

Anyways so theres Tuesday and Wednesday where I technically have no English classes in my school, so I help out an old counterpart from Ondortolge Bayarcahn who is actually a Russian teacher. Kinda quiet and by the book old school type teacher. She teaches Russian to 4th graders in my school. Ive been assigned on these two days to assist her. Trouble is like last year our team teaching method to her is “you teach 20 minutes, then I will teach 20 minutes” I pick my battles in Mongolia and getting her to move on this is pretty far down my list, so on these days I just try to be present in the school and help out where needed.

Out of boredom today I watched a few clips of Entourage on youtube. I hadn’t ever really watched this show but unless you live in a cave its easy enough to know what its about. One guys famous and you follow the life of him and his buddies living the impossibly high life in LA. Now at first this seemed innocent enough, but something told me this was a weird setup. Not as in it wouldn’t be good. HBO doesn’t make series that don’t last or aren’t popular after all. Instead I just felt as though I should be mocking something specific about this show. I watched a little more and I felt like I was eerily close to some horrible, horrible truth. Finally I am watching the four of them at some outdoor restaurant wearing four very different styles of clothes that would make GQ proud and drinking beers and complaining about an obscure topic like anal sex and the four men find that each of them is at a different viewpoint and stage of that in their lives and we spend the next 22 minutes watching them all grow a little on the subject. Thank gods I was alone when I came to this mind shattering revelation.

I AM WATCHING SEX AND THE CITY FOR MEN!!!!! Seriously men have been watching this show for seven years? Its Sex in the City for crying out loud! Geeze…thank goodness my internet out here is still too spotty to get enough television.

By the by, I have been reading more of the bible of late. It sorta slipped by after the early parts of summer but ive been getting through a little each night. I gotta say though, after you get past the historical sections of the bible it starts to get into a pretty damn dry book. All about how to live your life and a lot less cool battles and death….i dunno if I am gonna finish this after all. I think the middle chapters of the bible are sorta like the Simalarion of Lord of the Rings books. Unless you are an impressive fan of the all around genre this part just feels like your waiting for the good stuff to pick back up.

If I assess correctly a lot of the Evangelicals use those obscure middle books to quote obscure and out of context lines in their various protests. You rarely see a protester at a rally holding a sign with a Leviticus X:XX on it do you? No its always more a new testament thing.

Light day, think ill go for some jogging.

September 15, 2010. Bagkhangai, Mongolia.

A few days ago I skyped with my mom. She was all praise about this blog (amusing given how its probably her and 10 or so other people who read it) but she said she particularly liked when I used pictures. She then paraphrased that my sister enjoyed this too because “There is no way we are just going to look at 5000 photos of Mongolia from your computer when you get back”

Eloquent as always my sister is. Worry not though. With my minor in IT and a Macintonsh laptop I have at my disposal the means of making montage movies! Montage movies are a particular genre. Before the time of video editing these things were only made by professionals that would make things like promos for movies and television shows. Nowadays however pretty much any loser with a laptop, a movie and song they love and a lot of spare time can make one.

Back to the photos. Well I have in the past made montage movies of my time at the Bagkhangai school year and worry not I will take the brightest and the coolest of my Peace Corps photos and turn them into a cool montage movie clip that will be around ten minutes long. Go me! So worry not sis, youll see the highlight reel.

Lets see…some Mongolian related stuff.

Today me and my Haasha father did a little maintenance work on my ger. My ger is brand spanking new, but the thing is that the ger belongs to the school. They haven’t really been in need of my ger so its sat in storage from what I gather for a good four or so years before I finally asked for its use and they rolled it out. Therefore a lot of the straps and whatnot are new in terms that the dye on the straps is coming right off but at the same time the straps are a little frail and some of them have snapped from nothing other than being wound around a ger for a few weeks. With the help of my dad we patched that right up. My door entrance however requires a tad more finesse. It was a crummy door from the first day. I decided to admire the design rather that realize the part near the hinges was all splintered. Ive used elbow grease to get it to fit into place but today when opening it the hinge finally just snapped off. This requires a little more skill to fix than even my father can provide so I find myself trying to pull up my “broke” vocabulary when talking to my boss at the school.

Im sure they will fix it eventually, and the door still can lock shut. I take my laptop with me when I usually leave anyway.

September 19, 2010. The bus headed back to UB, Mongolia.

You know, in all fairness I only post one or two entries a month, but now that I calculate that my average blog entry is over 20 pages long this really does have the potential being made into a book when I get back to America. “Three Shots of Vodka” Just remember blog readers, you got to read this book for free! Think about that.

So something happened after I finished that journal entry on Wednesday night. My computer died. Not froze, not the chimes of death. I mean that I pushed the button, the “CHIME!!!” rang and all I got to see was a black screen. I tried a projector and that didn’t display things either.

This meant one of three things had happened. The least likely was the most hopeful. I had put my monitor to sleep accidently and didn’t know how to activate it. The second being that the video card had fried itself and that I was no longer going to be able to use this computer, but if I ever brought this computer to a Mac store they could probably salvage my files. The third being that my hard drive fried itself, and that meant that I had just lost every digital photo I have ever taken along with my music and video files I have created. Those are naturally in order of preference as well.

Strangely, I didn’t panic. I just sorta sat quietly in my ger Wednesday night realizing just how imbued I had been to my computer. Go figure! Well it meant I could read more and write. I even broke out my old journal that I keep notes in as well. Good for me!

So on Thursday I take the bus into UB. Your usual ride in of bump and bump in a crowded bus. I remember when bus rides and commutes in America felt so long. Mongolia will make me a very tempered individual! We get in and I head to the only computer guys I trust in UB. I doubted my computer could be fixed but maybe I could get my hard drive data and then have another computer shipped in.

We spent around four hours on it. The dude working there had as much computer expertise as me, but he did have a tiny screwdriver so unlike me he could take off the motherboard. When he opened it I expected to find the video card that would be scorched in some place where it had burnt out. Instead I saw the hard drive and motherboard looking perfectly fine. This gave me my first spark of hope. He did what I would have done next in this situation and basically pulled the video card off the motherboard and then snapped it back in. When he did that, the test boot brought up the screen!

He tightened everything back together and charged me 60,000 tugriks to basically do what I could have done if I owned a tiny screwdriver. Not complaining, merely pointing out to those that say the IT profession is overcrowded that its pretty damn useful job trait to have!

The computer runs okay, though the internal fans are now continuously running at full speed and will not rest when the computer is not being taxed. Its not loud, just something new I wish hadn’t taken place. Again, my computer works, not going to whine THAT much.

I also instantly pulled out my external hard drive and moved 30GB worth of photos from the last six years and backed them up in case my computer ever falls apart again. Phew! If I could only be so luckily in everything that I do.

So I filled out some Peace Corps paperwork that day as well and said hi to a few volunteers I hadn’t seen in a while. Were all quite a social bunch. I also got to see Esther again. Esther is leaving pretty soon and while this UB trip was Dentist inspired I was rather glad to see her one more time, especially given that this weekend was her birthday. Cant celebrate that alone can she?

Friday morning was dentist stuff. The woman who works at that office knows her stuff that’s for sure, but how “good” can a dentist really be? Few hours prodding and drilling. Nothing for it, I like Coke and it sure beats the endgame pain. Ow ow and all that. She wants to talk to you when shes got six instruments hanging out from it, all that good stuff.

I spent the afternoon convalescing. Esther had some paper work to do. That evening she calls me up and asks if I want to take an overnight ger camp she used to work at and they would bring me back for my next dentist appointment Saturday morning. I will say I encountered for the first time in my life the experience where after being invited out to the countryside to split a ger and drink booze I went “well…I got to get up early and I have a denti…hey hey hey!!!! A hot girl just invited you out to the countryside for some partying moron! Pack your bag and get moving. My first memorable old guy moment. Just a slip!

She spent the evening talking to the people she had been volunteer working with and all that and I sorta just kept quiet. The ger camp was only 30km out of town and I knew the area as being only a few km from Zuunmod. The camp was only seven or so gers buried deep in a hill pass, kinda out of the way and not the advertising type. You go here to work, not vacation. Made for a nice place to sleep for a night.

The 6am wakeup call was no fun for sure though. They got me back to the town pretty quick though. I hadn’t been on the roads in UB at that hour. Even in front of Sukbaatar Square in the center of UB (and therefore the center of the country) there was only one police car and nothing else! Pretty damn cool.

The dentist that followed wasent. Actually I was still half asleep as she drilled away so I sorta was able to zone out. By noon I had finally replaced all my expiring fillings and to my knowledge my teeth were now in working order. Lets keep it that way teeth shall we?!

I also on that day posted my video submission for the “My Piece of the Peace Corps” project. Everyone go on youtube and look that up so you can vote for it (unless you don’t like it then screw you!) A final nigh was spent with Esther and a dinner at the spiciest Chinese restaurant in UB took place. That was a great thing to do and I can tell I am going to miss her. Havent really missed anyone in a long long time…its kinda strange to have that missing feeling again.

So that brings us up to speed on the latest UB run. Ill give my 3rd liver to Sky Father if he doesn’t make me have to come back for a period of time! Can I just stay in my quaint little inexpensive town and relax for more than the span of a week???

Phew…

September 20, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well back at the site. The internet is all screwy today, which I hope is just a tempermental thing secluded to today. Classes are back to their usual fun selves. I don’t really have a particularly challenging day like I did last year, or when I was a high school history teacher. This year the school year is pretty lax. They just don’t use me for the higher up grades because they have pretty much assessed that ill try to get the kids to talk instead of write…and that just wont do. So they stick me in the classroom with the little kids and let me play the clown all I want. Id be offended if I didn’t think this setup suited everyone.

Life is winding down as the cold weather approaches. My family has built their own winter ger about five feet away from mine, and though they still sleep in the summer house its only a matter of time before they take refuge in the more heating designed ger. Running requires the long pants and coats now as well. When you don’t live in the city, the winter becomes a period of time where you can put down your summer labors and relax some. Though I didn’t exactly have labors in the summer I was definitely FAR more active this summer than I had been in the spring and winter before it. I don’t miss summer per say, but I definitely realize that living in a ger will require me to get my body in the mood for some cold as hell weather!

So with no internet and classes done im sort of passing the time in the teachers lounge chatting and looking over at the wireless device trying to will it to work. I figure after work ill forego running and replace it with the exercise of lugging 30 liters of water over to my ger so I can boil up a round of potatoes and spend the evening trying to type up some survey information I can use for the documentary I am trying to prepare for when PC Mongolia turns 20. Just another day in Mongolia!

September 21, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Getting cold. Getting cold a lot faster than it did last year. Was not like this until October. Even in a ger without a stove its still to me not all that bad. Just a good blanket and your body heat handles the rest. I imagine when my family moves into their ger and sets up their stove ill ask for mine as well. The cold has at least gotten all those annoying spiders out of my ger at least too.

Though cold one thing the Fall season is still bringing is the rain. Now lucky for me my ger was covered head to toe in a rain proof tarp that actually did its job well. In another months time it wont rain again for over six months and once they add a few layers of insulation to my ger I imagine a light little crackle of coal will heat the whole ger quite nicely.

Peace Corps ger inhabitants are faced with a preference choice. Keeping oneself okay at night always brings about difficulties. Do you make a huge fire before bet and let it crackle out at night? Do you prep a fire the night before, shiver through the night and then light it up in the morning? Do you do some other pattern of your own? This is what I need to decide on pretty soon, because each one will require a differing amount of coal.

September 23, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Forgot to post something yesterday. In all fairness that may begin to happen more often. After all that happened over the summer and all the stupid UB runs I had to make the past month ive been really looking forward into getting some face time in with my town, and for the first time in a while ive been here now more than a week. I have no real interest in making a UB run anytime soon either.

Nope, its just a few easy classes of teaching followed by a good long run in the afternoon followed by hanging out with some members of my community and then a few video games and maybe a round or two of alcohol (gods dammit I HATE vodka!!!)

The ger is working out well. I have still kept my fire stove out of my ger for the time being. Though cold at night I actually enjoy it and it gives my room a lot of space and a little more time before the coal starts to make its mark all over the place.

I should probably spend this weekend making the questionnares for the documentary I am trying to throw together. Wont take long, and be good to get a ball rolling.

September 24, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Its strange how easy it can be to forget things. Like last year, its FIELD DAY! That wonderful time where the two schools meet at the field and we duel in games of wrestling, tug of war and general running.

I was having a particularly lazy day, so I didn’t feel like joining in like I usually would, but I did know that I could fall into the default role of cameraman. I will say the games were your expected amount of just getting the kids to run around and all that good stuff, but something weird happened. I finally got to run back into a lot of the kids from Ondortolge that I had taught last year. A lot of them had spent the summer out in the countryside helping out when the work in the summer kicks in. We had met again for the first time in over four months and egads! Those kids grew. Like GREW grew. It’s the first time in my life that I have taught for more than one year in any singular location (it’s a long story, im not THAT bad of a teacher) so I never actually saw my students through the years. It was sorta fun to reminisce with the kids, especially now that my Mongolian has sharpened. Good walk down memory lane.

Will say this as well, it may have been a walk down memory lane but its definitely not the same temp as last September. Last September I walked to Field days in shorts and a t-shirt. Today I was dressed in a thick longsleeve and sweatpants. It’s a good omen. It means the cold is gonna spread itself out this year. Way easier to deal with I imagine and just in time for my ger living….right???

This is gonna sound weird I know. I just moved into my ger. I love it with a passion. The uniqueness of it coupled with the idea that it still exists because even after Millenia of use it is still the easiest and most efficient way to live in this part of the world. Anyways I realized that though I have only been here about a month and I have another 9 or more months to reside in this room that I am typing from I seem to realize something so very very true. When I move out, I am truly gonna miss living like this. From 1 bedroom apartments in the Bronx to bungalos in Thailand all the way down to my Mom’s basement, I definitely have had some diverse homes, or maybe not homes but places where ive hung my hat.

The ger though…I tell you you can look at all the photos you want and you can listen to everyones blogs till the end of time but all that pales in comparison when you find yourself actually residing in a ger itself. One that’s not a hotel or Ger Camp type, but the ones where the things inside are the things you own and use. Your own unique taste goes into its layout, its style, and the way it all feels. We imbue, and when all you have is one room with no corners you get the idea of just how imbued you can become.

Cool…

September 25, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I just read in the news that Kathleen Heigl gave 1 million dollars over to animal shelters so animals would not have to be euthanized as much. She seems to think the euthanizing that takes place in American shelters is sorta barbaric….

Mrs. Heigl…would you like to know what they do to unwanted animals here. Better still, would you like to know HOW as well?

Its all relative…it really really is.

September 26, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

I really really hate vodka. That’s all I got to say about that.

So I had a bit of a flashback last night. I thought back to the time I was in Southeast Asia. I was sleeping in a bungaloo with a legion or so of English soldiers on vacation and one Canadian guy named Jonathan. One day we had gone over to a nearby beach that was not one of the bigger ones and as we stood waist deep in the crystal clear warm waters I remember Jonathan running by me shouting “Just think, we could all have jobs right now!”

That trip to Asia had come right after I had had one of those most stressful years of my life. I was 25 years old and I had GREY hair from all the stress. As I heard him shout that I remember just how blissful I felt. Of course, because I went to Asia I lost the love of my life…but at the time I didn’t know that. Ignorance is bliss as well.

Next time I join Peace Corps I am gonna try and REALLY request a country with an ocean. The cold, the endless meat I can easily take. Hell I can even choke down the vodka often enough. Its just the lack of water. It takes a toll.

This is my way of whining that I miss the ocean today more than usual.

September 28, 2010. Bagakhangai, Mongolia.

Well, I noticed punching in todays date that I have gone through yet another month. I guess that means its time to punch up a new blog entry. This one is obviously not nearly as epic as the last one was. Sue me, it cant all be a vacation. Yesterday some ladies came over to put the final touches on my ger. We installed the stove in the center of the ger and then wrapped up the ger one final time and put a layer of sand down around the edges to cut back on the breeze. It’s a complete ger now.

Still not making fires yet. Not cold enough for that now and there will be plenty of time for that later. Oh…I caught the mouse. It had napped in my garbage can (plastic bag) and so I was able to expel it from my ger. I imagine it being the clever little thing that it is he will be back shortly.

Life trickles on, and its good to be nice and stuck in Bagakhangai for a sustained period of time!

August 27, 2010. Nayra’s Café. Mongolia. (i waited to today to post)

Today’s Quote: “Shut up and take my money!" -Phillip J. Fry

Lets start with some photos of before i went on the trip, including my move to a ger...

Ah Mongolia. Only you could take the Soviet design, arguably the ugliest buildings on the planet and make them beautiful

Time to Move...

Thats the van we usually use to shuffle between two towns. I got a lot more stuff than i thought, we filled that sucker up!

Setting up that fire port

Well it really happened...all my bitching and whining and i ended up with everything i wanted. I REALLY need to learn from this for future events in life!

It even gets morning and twilight sun!

So the Hovsgul Nuur trip began back around July 20 or so. It began in UB. I had preparations to make. I had the tent, but I needed a sleeping bag. I just could not bring myself to lug that stupid -20celcius sleeping bag Peace Corps gave me that I have used once. No I instead walked into the “Flower Market” made a bee line for the camping equipment and found the absolute cheapest piece of garbage sleeping bag I could find. Ten thousand tugriks got me something that resembled a blue tarp that you could see through. So a half assed tent and a half assed sleeping bag. Do I know what specific places to skimp or WHAT????

Next up I needed a bus ticket to travel to Hovsgul (the town of Moron…you read correctly) So as I am about to leave my guesthouse for that bane of my existence known as the Dragon Market located in the industrial center on the edge of the epic sized town of UB, I bump into a Spaniard, and Englishman and an Italian (as would be expected) They want to camp, and they hear Hovsgul Nuur rocks, but they did not know how to get there…guess they are coming with me!

So we load into a taxi and split the cost it takes to get to that bus station. We go inside and all hell is breaking loose. The bus station is a madhouse on a good day. Its not a good day! People frantically shuffling, shouting at one another, seeming to think that if they are annoying enough they can cut in line (they can) I begin by trying to find which of the seven windows selling tickets is the ones that sell it to Moron. No signs anywhere, and people waiting in line are far too impatient to try to understand my Mongolian, so after standing in the shortest line for ten minutes I finally get to ask the lady at the counter of that line if shes the right one. Shes not, but to get me out of her site shes unfortunately stuck with the painstaking task of pointing out which line I should go in. After she had done so I should have guessed, the corner aisle which is particularly full and bustling.

So armed with my glorious Mongolian I put my stuff down and ask my newfound cadre of multi-European ethnic entourage to watch my stuff while I buy our tickets for tomorrow. I figure if they plan to rob me I at least have their passports and the money for three Hovsgul tickets of theirs. They can have my smelly shirts. Seven people are in line. By “line” I mean that there are seven people who from the window descend one way out. Ten other individuals (all male, mid aged, kinda fat, sunglasses on indoors, tough professional suits on…the kinda people that if you judge them at face value you shout DOUCHE!!!) are throwing their money and passports through the tiny window and shouting destinations. The woman behind the counter works at the pace of a government paid worker. Emotion and commotion long since unaffecting her. Good for her.

We made no progress. Two hours passed, three people were served. Something about the combination of one guy at the front buy tickets for the entire Mongolian army to travel to fifty destinations and the woman being unable to read passport numbers and just the good old fashioned its hot and im gonna work slow work ethic. I ran myself through my meditations and kept constantly checking my pockets as the people kept bumping and rubbing against me. Remember…we don’t change barring gross trama…and I hate lines and rude stupidity as much before I got here as I do now, but when I wait in America in the future that hardship and relativity to this place wont hold a candle to situations like this. Im gonna be like Yoda, if Yoda wasent green and tall and didn’t have the Force and all that.

So literally after three hours im next in line, the guys not in line but trying to shove/cut are eyeing me. GRINGO!!!! Is being shouted mentally by them all. If theres anyone to push out of the way its me. The teenager in line in front of me finished and I slide into the window place. I knew the guy who was gonna try to knock me out from the very beginning. He was one of your typical biggish and well rounded Mongolian men and he pushed, not lightly either. Grabbed the front of my shoulder and tried to pull me back so he could slide in. I had seen it coming, and I got the grip, with my right hand I held the money and passports and with the left I locked myself down on the sill between me and the cashier. The dude found me not budging and and tried again, and with that second pull I twisted my body around to look right in his eyes and with a sharp bark I said the only word you can say in this situation “HOARSH!!!” (HEY!) I caught him off guard, and my stare was tempered by the long line wait and a year in this country. I was still gambling because in essence this could be taken as a challenge and I had no intention of fighting this guy if he chose to stop pulling and start hitting. But luck finally caught up and the guy let go of my shoulder after a moment and as I turned back to the still glass eyed bored cashier drenched in sweat and uncomfortable in so many ways I said in the most polite and formal Mongolian I have ever uttered: “Four tickets to the capital of Hovsgul if you please”

I had drenched my clothes in sweat doing this, but I had the bloody tickets!

So the next morning I wake up in my guesthouse and I do something I don’t like to do. I gambled on trust. The guesthouse I usually stay at knows me pretty well by now, and I know them. But I had a laptop. Now I could have gone to the Peace Corps office and asked for a storage cubical for the month or something, but in the end I just relied upon my Guesthouse not stealing or losing my laptop for a month. Its not irreplaceable per say, but it does have files on it that had I lost them I would have once again lost a large chunk of my creative talent. That had happened to me long long ago, before I had lost my muse, and it sucked balls….but im ready to try trust again!

I packed up the backpack with everything I was bringing and a small day bag filled with my needed electronics and whatnot. It was a lean amount of gear ladies and gentlemen. You see, I imagined me riding a horse with the big bag on my back and whatnot and so I would find myself needing to keep it light…but im getting ahead of myself ill tell you it then. The point is the bag was light.

I sat at Nayras for a little bit killing time until my bus at Dragon Center left and tried to once again get myself all calm again. It did not go well. As usual in retrospect it is very hard to remember what it is exactly that I was worried about. Robbed, killed and hurt come to mind. The alone thing didn’t help, but as usual it did afford me the great luxury of traveling where I wanted, when I wanted and in the way that I wanted.

Freedom…I discussed that word and how I came by it a long time ago. It seemed to apply most right then and there.

So after worrying myself up, I said a few final txt farewells and got on a taxi to Dragon Center, and once again got overcharged being driven to the worst part of UB.

I got there and…waited. Nothing for it, I had to be early to be sure they didn’t give up my seat and the only way to do that is to do as Mongols do. Sit for long uncomfortable periods of time at and around the bus as we await some old guy who cant be bothered to be there at the same time. The bus itself was sorta a hybrid of the Russian jeeps that look like they are built to withstand nuclear fallout and a regular tourist bus. It can probably hol around 15 bodies comfortably. Its gonna hold over 40… (what are you new at this?)

The trio show up bringing enough gear to supply the Romanian army. There gonna be there three bloody days! Ah well, so the bus finally took off.

Next to a rather fat woman but at this point that’s the least of all troubles you can encounter in traveling in Mongolia.

Six hours or so passed. Little of note. Bump bump bump….ow ow ow…and so on. Then the storm was there…

Ive seen summer storms in my day, but that storm was scary as hell. We were off road by now as well. The whole bus was worried. It was one of those storms that blacks out the sun…like night time blackout and whatnot. Bus didn’t even break stride. We plowed through. The storm was fast and furious, and the bus is definitely NOT watertight. Ah well, add it to the pile of discomforts. The storm passed and a tire exploded. Spent the next hour collectively standing around outside while we fixed that.

Then night fell and everyone found a way to sleep. I can understand why boundaries don’t exist on Mongolian buses. We simply need to rustle up against one another until we finally find some variation of comfort to fall unconscious. We don’t sleep, its just a state in which our bodies barely register the passing of time. My personal favorite way is how I used to sleep on school buses (it took my little bus an hour to get to my high school…long story) Its where you turn your body into a U and prop your knees up on the seat in front of you and sink down until the sheer amount of space locks you in. Its not exactly great on your spine, but hey…I fell asleep!

Next morning we woke up, and the terrain was different. More rivers and forests, sorta like Dadal, but there were subtle differences even from that area. We crossed a bridge/ferry and oddly the roads started to get a little better. We passed the sign for Moron and found ourselves over two hours away from the city (the city encompasses the area around it…TEASE!!)

So then after a somewhat NOT horrific trip we crossed over a hill and Moron was there. Moron is interesting. Its built like a modern city in the center of a depression. Its back is not to any specific mountain like most Mongol towns and cities and to see a city of tens of thousands that expands out in every direction and then after one block just drops off into countryside is an amusing site to see. What can I say, im easily entertained.

So we hop off the bus and it’s a bunch of Monogolians and me and the trio. Were obviously en route to Khatgal at the base of Hovsgul Nuur. Dudes run up and start using broken English to say “Okay you come with me” and all that good stuff. I break out the Mongolian and ask a price. First I had to get them to stop asking for Dollars and instead ask for Tugriks and then I had to break the news that im not a Mongolian tourist nor an idiot. Thirty thousand tugriks for a fracking lift. I get they are in this to make money, but the minute I opened my mouth and started speaking Mongolian it should have been obvious they should stop wasting time and just charge me the standard 7000 tugriks to take my ass there. Well that didn’t happen and as the only Mongolian speaker I had to do all the arguing. NOT my favorite job, especially after seventeen hours on the road, but eventually I got the rate and the vehicle to take me and the trio. We loaded up and went through another long and painful drive on a well weathered road to Khatgal. There was probably some beautiful scenery along the way but mostly I was so impatient to see the Lake that I missed it. Theres a road project underway to make a decent gravel road between Moron and Khatgal, but they had only gotten to the stage of dumping out piles of gravel along the way. It was a tad annoying to bang along the grass and hills while looking at a pile of gravel that will one day be a comfortable road for so very many.

Anyways….another uncomfortable car ride later, we pulled up on the park…oh wait though, first the car started to smoke. Not in an overheat type way from the hood, but from under the seat of the driver himself the car bellowed out copius amounts of smoke.

Ill give the driver credit, he stopped once. He looked at the engine piece under his seat, tapped it with a hammer once or twice. Started the car back up, and again the car started smoking. However, as the vehicle still worked he just drove us along. How amusing. We had to pass a checkpoint to enter the park, and I imagine that a smoking car wouldn’t be allowed in the park so as we came down the hill to the checkpoint he killed the engine and coasted through the checkpoint, even waving at the guard as we passed, and then turned the engine back on. Ah…sneaky

So we get to Khatgal and get dumped at the gas station. By now the trio were a little cranky as well and demanded to be taken directly to the lake. They didn’t seem to grasp that Khatgal is on the river at the base of the lake, and I was in no mood to instruct or complain, so I just let the do their thing. I walked towards the town and flagged down the first walking white guy I saw. “Sup dude, you know where the guesthouses are?” The dude didn’t even flinch. Just pointed in the direction he had been walking from and said “try Bonda Lake Guesthouse” So I did. Its funny who things work themselves out.

The guesthouse was right over at the river, and was obviously a staging area for those destined to horseback ride and whatnot. I go through the gate and ask the sweet ladies “Or bahn uu?” (Have you got a bed?) They give me my own ger with a king sized bed in it for 4000 tugriks a night. That’s under three dollars a day. Good gods I love this country. So I get some of the best sleep of my life on that bed and eat up a lot of the day. Finally I find the owner later that night. Hes Bayara. Dude knows his stuff, especially English. We were both very proud of our language skills though so our conversation was a Mongolian speaking in English and an American speaking in Mongol. Theres a joke in there somewhere…

So I didn’t mince words, the conversation went something like this:

“Hi, im here to see as much of the lake and the Taiga as I possibly can. I obviously need a horse and a guide.”

“How many are there of you?”

“Im alone”

“You ever ridden a horse before?”

“Not really no”

“How long do you want to go?”

“Twenty five days”

Ill give him credit, he maintained a poker face but I know this guy was mentally screaming jackpot. I told him id need a discount for being there that amount of time, I also told him id be happy to tag along with any group he knew as well. He shot that down pretty quick. Almost all people who go on riding trips go for a week, two tops.

To have someone who wants to go out that long and that far…yea I rock to this guy.

Ill give him credit for a different reason too, he knew his stuff. I went to eat dinner and before I finished he told me he had what I needed. A guide from the northern lake town Khank that would go on the trip and knew how to get me to the Reindeer people as well. Kick ass indeed! He wanted twenty thousand tugriks a day. That’s ten for the guide and then five for my horse and the pack horse they wanted me to bring. With saddlebags I really thought I had brought little enough that I didn’t need a pack horse but they wouldn’t have it any other way. Twenty thousand tugriks is around fifteen dollars a day. I think the only people who have ridden horses in my family did so on shore leave from cruise ships and they spent over a hundred dollars for an afternoon. Not bad, not bad at all. I said yup and asked when we shipped out…

“tomorrow” he said and then walked away.

Well tomorrow came and we didn’t go. It rained and was ugly as hell. Luckily if we hauled ass in some places we knew that we could do the trip in 24 days instead. So we did so.

The day after I awoken from a great night sleep and as I am wrapping up my breakfeast of Tsuivan in walks a guy. His name was Khmer….yes as in the peoples and language of the Cambodians. Well that name simply wouldn’t do, but for the moment lets press on. So we do the handshakes and intros and then we lock down the price amount and the day I need to be back in Khatgal and all that good stuff. Then we go to my ger and inspect my stuff. My tent and sleeping bag both got laughed at. The owner came back in a few minutes and gave me an additional sleeping bag as well as a glove to wear when it was cold out for riding (its freaking July!)

The tent I swear up and down to be waterproof and seeing as they didn’t have a spare they shrugged and just threw it in the mix. Then they inspected my provisions. Muslei, a few packets of noodles, some vodka and the power bars my Aunt had sent me. Again, we would need more so we both went on a delguur run. Just so you know, for that initial amount of food Khmer took out a flour sack and put it all in one bag and then put it IN my backpack (remember that piece of information…its important later)

We go to the delguur and I watch Khmer in action. He buys the important stuff first. A kilogram of pipe tobacco and about fifty sheets of paper to make cigs with. Then he additionally buys four packs of cigarettes and a metric ton of matches. After the essentials are covered, he then buys two kilograms of curled noodles and some square blocks of Monoglian bread (the type that doesn’t fall apart, its solid as a rock, and tastes about the same) Not having a clue what to get, I buy some terrible honey for the bread and a can of coffee grinds (don’t have a clue what I was doing) I kept asking if I had enough stuff and he assured me that in eight days we would arrive in Khank and could resupply again. (wait for it)

So we bring back the new provisions to the guesthouse and he tells me to grab all my things. So I put on my horseback riding gear and stuff away the odd shirt and pair of shorts I am not taking into the big packpack that will be staying behind at the guesthouse (as well as everything else in there…did you catch it?) and i take my clothes and tent and walk outside the haasha of the guesthouse out to where the river is. Khmer is waiting there for me with three horses.

This is where the new names for this trip were decided upon. Mongolians don’t name horses, and theres no way im hanging out with a Mongolian whos names a Southeastern Asian language. He needs to be way cooler than that. We had three horses so on the spot I gave everyone their appropriate title. My chain smoking,grey hatted, five foot tall, bad toothed guide in this amazing part of the world would be Gandalf. He would ride atop the brown horse named Aragon. That left two horses, my own to ride and then the horse that would serve to carry all the heavy stuff. My love of the books more than the movies (and I do love the movies a lot btw) is what led me to the next decision. I would ride the horse named Gimli and the unfortunate pack horse would be Legolas. That elf got WAY too much publicity in the movie and Gimli is a Dwarven wrecking ball in the book unlike the comic relief of the movies. I however, despite all my personal vanity and love of the books and my ability to identify with a lot characters in the book (I always kinda picked up the Faramir vibe) but no I would not take up a LOTR character name for this journey. Instead it would just be little ole me riding with Legolas, Gimli, and Aragon as Gandalf took me to things id never knew existed….oh good gods im such a geek I feel like I should be stuffed into a locker by the Dungeons and Dragons club!

Actually my name was not Josh for this journey. Gandalf kept forgetting my name time and again. When he did remember it (after I would tell him it) he would never get the “ish” part of Josh down and instead went with John. So I was a John to him…get it??? Waka waka waka…

Okay yea, back to the trip. So we load all the stuff up and i watch for the first time as we tie all our gear to Legolas. I gotta say its not that much stuff at all once I looked at it. I realize that a pack horse is supposed to be shared by three or so bodies, and I know this was just there way of getting another 5000 tugriks out of me a day rather than just giving me some saddlebags to use on my horse, but at fifteen dollars a day they can “rip me off” all they want.

Then I got on Gimli. Lets recap here real quick. I am not a horseback rider in America. It wasent an option and aside from a few vacation afternoons and a few minutes on a horse from the previous Naadam ive never handled a horse in my life. Now, lets describe the horse. Its Mongolian bred, and these horses are short, fat, and wild even after a lifetime of servitude. Finally lets keep track of the fact that this is not a day trip or even a week trip. Its 25, (well now 24 days because of the rain) day trip! Say all that you would like about me and my faults, as I have many. I am arrogant in some ways, overly cocky, I cry about my problems rather than fix them, I claim to not care what people think about me and then do, the list could go on and I know a few people could help add to it. Yes I have these faults and more but as I mounted this half wild horse and realized what I had just agreed to do I allowed myself a grin as I realized one fault I surely do not posess:

-I do NOT do things half assed! Good for me, lets hope it doesn’t get me killed!

A quick photo and we were off. Our first day on the road…scratch that, there wasent any road! No we were out there where on the motorcycles and the horses tred. The first day was sort of surreal and hard to explain. First off I spent a lot of time getting used to the saddle. Gandalf seemed to prefer the Russian style saddle. It’s a little bar of cylindrical metal that is covered by a light cushion seat. The cushion can shuffle left and right and I think the goal is to sit your ass down so that the metal bars are along your spines base or something to that effect. Trying to do so on a moving horse presents a “challenge” Furthermore, the stirrups are built for short people. By short people I mean that people under six feet tall if the stirrups are the furthest out will have their knees extended far enough that they can ride comfortably. Im 6’4. Whee!!!

Nah we just rode over the river at the base of Hovsgul Nuur and took the path into the mountain passes. It was strange to not even really see all that much of the lake that first day. We pulled up to a small spot along the way. Hovsgul Nuur is a lake fueled by a trillion or so rivers, all of whose water is fresh enough just to scoop from the stream and guzzle down. Initially Gandalf brought us to a spot and said the creek was about 500 meters to our right. After spending an hour setting up camp and searching for the water we found out there was none to be had.

Did you know rivers dry up? Like completely? One day waters here, the next its just a pile of sequential rocks. This is something that would happen a lot to me on this amazing journey of mine. I think in some ways everything I came across I realized in some way happened, but based on my lifestyle and interests I had never actually bothered to LEARN learn about these sorts of things. Others will come up as time goes on.

Anyway, the problem of a lack of water was quickly remedied as we made our way a few more kilometers down the way and reached another river section. We quickly made camp and Gandalf set up a rock fire pit. Though the East side of the river is actually largely uninhabited and very rarely traveled to we would encounter the odd firepit used by previous travelers than ourselves.

There was always two sure fire ways of knowing if the travelers had been Mongolians or foreigners. The first would be if there were any discarded cans or bottles in the immediate area. We foreigners do love our canned goods, and it all gets left behind. Far easier to identify is a Mongolian fire pit. Its not like us Westerners who make a circle of rocks and then a fire. Mongolians take three rocks and make a point that you can put a kettle of some kind on. The rocks provide an amount of shield for the fire from wind and its also just an all around efficient setup.

So he breaks out the kettle and after a scoop of river water we get a small fire going from random wood around the area. Then he pulls out our food.

…I told ya it would pay off. In all our haste to depart, when I had grabbed my stuff and handed my big backpack over to the guesthouse I realized upon looking at the food that I had left all my own food supplies back in that back, that was now over 20 kilometers away. Good gods I always do this. What the hell? So Gandalf starts asking me if tomorrow I want to ride back to Khatgal and start off again. Oh yea btw Gandalf does not speak a single word of English btw, every conversation I have with this man is in Mongolian. Anyways I say hell no and ask him if we have enough of his supplies to feed the two of us until we reach Khank in the north. He says maybe, and on that note I said we don’t turn back and keep going.

Boy, am I the seasoned adventurer or what???

Well theres nothing for it so we sit down and watch tea boil. Its me all alone with another guy Mongolian who doesn’t speak a word of English. We talk about exactly what you would expect. We cover the whole “tea” conversation. Talk about fire, the nice day, the good horses, will it rain tonight…and then we sat and watched the fire for four hours. We also drank tea, a LOT of tea. Dinner that night was pasta noodles and some bread….thats what were going to eat every night on the road for the next 24 days. It was too early in the trip for me to be overwhelmed, but even as happy as I was that evening it did catch up to me then that I may have just bitten off quite a large chunk here.

Gandalf’s tent is actually his travel bag as well. Mongolians are pragmatic and practical in nature. If some technology or tool makes their life easier they pick it up without a moment hesitation. The clothing Dell and their traveling tents are excellent examples of why nothing from the West has replaced them. The tent is outstanding. It’s a tarp, completely waterproof and requires no poles or cables like complicated western gear that will wear down or break after constant use. The tent is also used to be one of the two bags that is strapped on to the horse for transport the next day, so it requires no space. The only thing it needs are two pieces of wood to make a T shape and wooden stakes you can make anywhere. The tent is also large enough to hold 2 people and all the gear that comes with it. The piece of clothing known as a Dell is also still the best way to go. Its long and sturdy. Its warm when its cold and airy when its hot. It can be a blanket, keeps the bugs and mosquitos off your body when riding and from getting cut by branches along the trail. It also has a huge body sized pocket that can hold your odds and ends.

Well I helped him set up his tent and while he laughed at mine and said theres no way in hell its going to repel water I was too early in the game and too proud to take up his offer to use the other half of the tent. After my 50th cup of tea I went to bed around 9ish (it was still lightish out)

I woke up the next morning to realize that it had rained last night, and the tent did NOT in fact stop water. Check that, it stopped SOME water. The water had slid down the side and collected in the four corners of the tent. Thank gods I kept all my electronics in my small backpack and wrapped in my rainjacket! I got out of the tent and a rough night of sleep (didn’t bring a mattress….what the hell did I think sleeping on the dirt would feel like?) I put on a happy face as Gandalf woke up as well. He got another fire going and made a morning pot of tea. We were on a strict Mongolian diet of one evening meal a day along with about 500 cups of tea. How the hell do people in this country get fat? A lot of them are too!

Well the tent was a total bust and Gandalf laughed his ass off about that and me forgetting my food again and again. In all fairness if a guy twice my size was screwing up in the ways that I was yea id laugh at him too. Gandalf always smoked too. In one day of actual time on the horse he had gone through one pack of cigarettes and in the evening and morning when not on the horse he hand rolled unfiltered cigs to smoke as well.

…actually I want to bring something up at this point. I have been in this country for a year now and I have even mentioned the cigs before about how there not taxed all that much (its around 2%) but the pipe tobacco is something else I am a little confused about. This country LOVES to smoke, so why does noone use a pipe? Seriously ive been here a year, over 60% of the population is regular smokers and ive never seen a single pipe in my time here. Pipes are small, durable, easy to take with you if your traveling, low maintenance, seriously why does noone have a pipe in the country?

Anyways Gandalf like all Mongolians likes to do his vices collectively so after rolling every cigarette he offers me one. That morning to humor him I gave one a try. Ive smoked the odd cig in my life and even used a Philly once or twice to light fireworks on Carolinan beaches. I had never actually just full on inhaled the real deal tobacco (hookah doesn’t count…right?) So I gave one a whiff and…..WOLF!!!!!!.... good gods it was like smoking a pack of cigs in one breath! I know one bad habit I am not going to be picking up!!!!

Knowing this would be something he would only give me more of as the days rolled by I had to come up with a way that he would guilt free be allowed to smoke around me while I had accepted hospitality. So I turned up the dramatic effect and coughed profusely to let the guy know this was not something I could keep doing and as it made the chainsmoker that he was look like a badass he seemed pleased by this. Cultural difficulty solved! I rock!

We broke camp and started to take off, and then it started to rain. Not too badly, but a steady stream of water. Now luckily I had brought three pieces of clothing with me that I was wearing both during that rain but also during the overwhelming majority of time on my trip. Check out the picture. Those cream colored pants, that blue rainjacket, and that floppy hat. Ready for a plot twist? All those clothes were bought over ten years ago for a far different adventure.

You see ten years ago (good gods!) back in 2000 I had spent the summer going on an Outward Bound journey. 21 days of sailing and rock climbing off the Coast of Maine at a little island called Hurricane Island (I still have and was even wearing the shirt of it on this trip) I bought all these heavy duty clothes thinking that 21 days in Maine would be tough. What can I say, I was a FAR FAR different person 10 years ago. Back then I was a tad overweight so all the clothes I bought still fit very well for when I was packing for Peace Corps. That raincoat is built to withstand monsoons, and while Maine didn’t rain much on a day like the second day of my horseback trip I was sure as hell glad it was on me. That hat kept me from roasting to death and kept the insane flies off me, and those pants are these thermal things that breathe better than cotton and insulate better than long underwear. Ten years later and that clothing FINALLY pays off. What can I say? Theres something to learn from everything, even clothes.

Yet on the subject of clothes there was one small catch about wearing my blue coat. Gimli used to be a race horse. Race horses in this country take off at the wave of a blue scarf at the corner of their eyes. My bright blue coat seemed to bring back memories to Gimli and everytime that I moved either of my hands Gimli bolted. To go from light trot to a full of gallop of your life is a terrifying experience. Your probably not holding the bar in front of you, Gimli has forgotten hes top heavy, and the only way to stop him is to get the reins and practically break his neck pulling. This happened half a dozen times before noon. It was wet, cold, ugly, (didn’t see the lake at all) and I was sleepy and fearing for my life and a bit hungry. The second day was definitely the “you asked for it” day.

Yet at noon on the second day I came to a huge cultural moment and I found out something about Mongolian hospitality. At noon we came down from one mountain pass into a sort of small clearing. A small sliver to our left was of the lake but it was mostly trees and one small ger with its back to a hill that blocked it from the rest of the lake.

Gandalf pulled us up and we hopped down. We had been riding for three hours and after yesterdays riding being my first and my stirrups not going down very far as I dismounted I got my first taste of saddle soreness. It wasent bad in the thighs for me, but in the knees. As I realized how different this was from my usual exercise I prayed to the Sky Father that my running work after this insane adventure of mine would still work.

Anyways we had pulled up to this random ger and dismounted. Gandalf tied the horses up and I proceeded to ask if he knew the people who lived here. I got a matter-of-factly “no…its Mongolia” (literal translation) from him. He walked up to the ger and opened the door without so much as a knock. Inside was a stern looking middle aged woman who was playing with the fire. Gandalf walked in and sat down on the floor. I naturally did the same. Within moments milk tea was given to us along with bread, orum (think of it like butter that’s really milky and sugary) and sugar as well. Gandalf and the lady spoke about the paths around here and how the weather was effecting it. I couldn’t understand every word of it naturally but eventually even I was invited into the conversation. Gandalf had forgotten my name and when I said it they both replied “John” Ah well…

Yes, but what we were involved in right now was a lesson in Mongolian hospitality. People in the countryside must be a hotel/inn/bar/info center/store/ all in one. For in a country as vast as this one if people traveled between one town to another and could not stop at countryside ger for food and drink hardly anyone would dare make such trips let alone survive. There not nice because its nice, they are nice because it keeps everyone alive. How very pragmatic…very practical….VERY Mongolian.

So we came out of the ger less than an hour later feeling a little drier with some warm milk in our stomach and some calories in our system. That was lunch ladies and gentlemen. The rain got worse in the afternoon, but we rode on. My horse continued to terrify me to even scratch my face because I had to wear my blue coat. If I didn’t have it on my horse didn’t really care what I did, it just hated that coat! We trekked on and on. The second day was not particularly pretty either. No real lake views, and lots of hard trekking on terrain that I wasent particularly a fan of. Lets let a few more days pass and then ill describe the various terrians I encountered in this journey of mine.

At the end of the second day the rain had still not let up, and Gandalf brought us to a clearning where once again two gers had there back to a hill that allowed a small sliver of the lake to slither through. Gandalf rode us through a massive patch of bog that finally brought us to the front door. This group was larger than the part we had met at lunch. The kids were out rounding up all the cattle (they had over 700 total!) We were once again invited in and given cups of tea and dinner. Dinner was meat on the bone. One of the most common meals of the Mongolian countryside. My manners lessons paid off well on a day like today. I held the knife correctly, cut only towards me and never pointed my blade at anything. I also picked every bone I ate quite clean (not as perfect as Mongolians can but they knew I was doing my dogged best)

After a miserable day atop a wet wild horse there is something so enjoyable as something as a warm ger and drying clothes. The feel of food that would usually be so bland to me being the food of the gods. We don’t change, we only gain in relativity. I like that mantra, and unlike a lot of other mantras that one I am pretty sure I invented on my own so I am going to keep bringing it up.

Though I was quite happy with just the food and tea, they had an ace in the hole. They made Airag. Yet this was not the Mongolian vodka that you buy in a bottle. No this stuff tastes like water, and has about 15% alcohol content. I love the stuff, and the intoxication definitely helped. So there we sat, Gandalf smoking like mad (oh yea, they all smoke indoors in small round rooms, thank gods I cant smell that well) and chatting away with the very friendly family while I drank both our rations of alcohol. It was a VERY good night. We slept on the floor of the ger, which after using my crappy tent I will say the floor of a ger is a wonderful wonderful place to sleep.

I woke up the next morning feeling like a million bucks. Theres no real breakfeast in Mongolia but they fed us bread and they even made more alcohol. They offered me some but I quickly explained that I rarely drink in the morning. That went over way better than I expected it to. I also got some really cool shots of their distiller and how they use it.

Its actually a rather simple device, no wonder alcohol built the pyramids!

Well the day was a little nicer outside and after too long we strapped the gear back onto Legolas and rode off further up the East Coast of the lake Hovsgul.

The third day took us to great new heights…literally. We spent the majority of the day trekking up this one massive mountain called “Greater Santin” As we rode up the pass I could only keep thinking how tall the mountain must be if this was the pass. At the top I stopped to grab some shots of the Ovoo at the top. It was quite well decorated, and I did the ceremonial three clockwise rotations of the thing to ask the Sky Father and Earth Mother to protect me on this voyage of mine. The ride was long and perilous. The muggy weather and the forests we trekked up the pass were packed with bugs that not only attacked me but also our horses.

Do you know why horses have tails? Its one of those facts that I knew but didn’t know cause it never effected me but a horses tail allows it to swap at its back so the horse mosquitos get brushed off it. It does this because if a horse gets bitten just enough it will go wild and buck like crazy. I would know, it happened. I wasent prepared for it either and lets just say thank gods im in some of the better shape of my life because with one loose hand and two very strong legs I got the horse back under control.

The other problem was riding downhill. Do you remember that scene in Lord of the Rings when the Rohirrim charge? Granted I guess if it’s a warhorse they train it differently but I learned very quickly how hard it is for a horse to travel down an incline. We would dismount and walk them down. It’s a shame, I was hoping to recreate that scene as its one of my favorite scenes. Actually my favorite part of that scene is just after the Uruk-hai have all lowered their lances and just before they all clash theres one of the Orcs who gives off this absolutely primal “ROAARRR!!!!” What can I say? Im a fan of defiance. But no it was slow trekking but LONG trekking. We spent over five hours getting to the top of the pass and we needed to be near water as we would camp that evening and the nearest river was quite a long way down. We made it just before dark, but luckily we set up camp pretty quickly. We barely even had one round of tea before we started boiling water for pasta. We were hungry as all hell as the mountain pass had no gers to stop in for rest and food. It was the day that I realized how important and useful that hospitality really was.

We ate hungrily and said very little. After three long days I was beginning to realize just how well I do alone. It’s a blessing for sure, but also probably a bad sign that I can spend days at a time in someone elses company and I truly feel no urge to make small talk. I then also thought about just how much a rant when I am in the company of English speakers, and I think that means that very often when I am making small talk I find the overwhelming majority of things I have to say to be pretty damn useless. Buddha had a lot to say on the issue of speaking well and not when not needed.

So little was said, much was understood. We sat and watched fire, we ate like we had ridden for seven hours on empty stomach, he smoked more than the fire did and we collapsed into sleep.

I woke up at 2 in the morning to rain pouring on my sleeping bag. My tent was once again leaking and the rains had returned. There was little to do at this point in the night, and I was still too proud to go ask Gandalf for help. I stretched the tent as much as I could so the tauntness would carry most of the water just to the four corners and I kept the electronics bundled up. By the by, its about 30 degrees colder at night than during the day on the East side of the lake. Not easy to handle when its also cold out!

I got up the next morning with about four hours of unsatisfying sleep in me. The rain had naturally stopped at dawn, and while I complain about the night rain at least the morning sun would burn off a lot of the rain before we would pack up. I assessed all my stuff and luckily everything that got wet could get wet. This was where Gandalf would ceremoniously come out of his massive Mongol tent bone dry and laugh at me profusely while once finished with his laughing asks me to just split his tent. Stupid pride!

We were still way up in the hills where we had camped and as we broke camp and packed up we spent the morning walking the horses down the hills. By the afternoon we finally reached the beach clearings of Lake Hovsgul. Good gods that lake is massive.

Its 1% of the worlds freshwater and having seen how much there is I am surprised there is not even more. The fact that that water is so pure means that the lake freezes over enough that Russian tankers can drive over the surface in the winter and even by the month of June there are still ice chunks floating around in it. The lake is also supposed to be teeming with fish, but as not the most avid fisherman I wouldn’t know, though I will say the lake makes for one hell of a photo.

By the fourth day we finally had reached the trail portion that hugs the lake and I spent the day clicking away on the camera.

This is the only photo ill comment on. Im 29 years old. I got a full head of hair, zero debt, i run marathons, i have my advanced degrees, i get to be a Peace Corps volunteer and last but certainly not least i still take a half decent picture...life is good!

The access to the water also meant that plenty of gers were up for their grazing duties and allowed us plenty of spots to stop in to get some milk tea and some bread. By the way, all gers have two things that sort of took me by surprise. The first is electronic in nature. Every ger we stopped at had a television. One of those old school, UHF dial type televisions no less! Additionally they were getting their reception not by antenna, but by fracking sattelite dish! Meaning that in every ger that we came across there would be some type of American movie on. One was even watching (on Mongolian state television btw, Mongolia has no copyright laws) Toy Story 3 translated into Mongolian. As I haven’t seen the movie and intent to see it proper I focused on the conversation in the ger instead.

Yet to power a television and sattelite dish would require more energy than just a car battery could supply. So every ger we encountered at Hovsgul Nuur called up their worship of the sun to give them the strength they require. By that I mean every ger has a set of solar panels! Some even have wind turbines. America and the rest of the world catch up with this. These people still live in round tents that they have been in since the dinos died off, and THEY have upgraded to solar and wind power. What the hell is taking us the progressive “West” so damn long. Didn’t we invent the bloody things? Common people get with the program!

Finally there is one little tool that all Mongolians have as well literally hanging by the sides of their beds. A rifle. Seriously everyone had one and every last one looked like it was waiting to be used. What exactly are they shooting? My guess was poaching wolves, but I couldn’t tell you and my questions didn’t get answered.

Halfway through the fourth day we had a full view of miles and miles to our west across the lake, and while it was clear directly above us it was very obvious that a summer storm was headed our way. Gandalf kept pointing at the sky and then did this: (Points at the sky, then points at the ground, then with two hands made a two fingered body with one and then with the other brought his fist down on the body) I knew what was going on before charades, but then he did something I hadn’t ever seen a Mongolian do. He brought Aragon and Legolas to a gallop pace. He was running so to speak. Ive never seen a Mongolian in a hurry, EVER!

Free tip, when a Mongolian runs…especially the person supposed to take care of you, why don’t you go ahead and run as well! We were in a large clearing area with the lake on our left and the nearest trees were up in the hills about 2 kilometers ahead of us. We full on charged up the hill. I gotta say that second day in which my horse went wild at random moments had given me enough practice to actually hold on when my horse started to gallop. The storm was crackling to the left and you could even see the part of the lake where rain had begun to fall. We made it in the knick of time, and Gandalf dismounted and we stood with our horses butts to the rain as the storm blew by. It had quite the punch I will say that and I get why we were off our horses. Even stationary and sheltered under trees the wind and rain was strong enough that I needed the tree to keep from being blown off, let alone if I had still been on the horse.

Cool as Mongolia is ten minutes later the storm was gone, the sun came right back out and the only memory of the rain came in the form of a wet damp feel in the air so hard to come by in Mongolia. We rode on and made camp with another Mongolian family that night. As always I gave 5000 tugriks over to thank for the hospitality of a meal and a floor to sleep on. Good thing we chose to sleep in a ger too, that night we had a much longer summer storm.

Day five carried on and we rode on. Usually guides take people around at a leisuirly 4 hour a day trekking pace. I had ignored the pain in my legs and out of sheer desire to see more I had pushed Gandalf and our fellowship on faster. This meant that I knew we had to be ahead of schedule for our encounter with the town of Khank, the hometown of Gandalf. Halfway through the day as we rounded a corner to an open area far to the north of the little island in the middle of the lake I asked how much further to Khank. “Tomorrow” came the reply. We did a 10 day trip in 6, we rock!

The night of day five was more rain. Once again my tent was not up to the task. Worse still was on the morning the rain didn’t burn off, meaning everything I owned was wet and without the sun to heat things up things were getting really cold. We didn’t even make tea that morning and rode to the nearest house, where we strode inside wet and exhausted. Once again, hospitality kept us going and alive We took our time here, because at this point even Gandalf was cold and soaked through. Also because of the proximity to the town of Khank (You could see it on the horizon after a brief depression) The road was long and wet, but after six long days on the road and a wet finish we reached the town of Khank, where Gandalfs family lived.

Up here in the town of Khank its far more Siberian than it is Mongolian. The view no matter where you were gave you a shot of the georgous lake, imposing mountains with imposing peaks that on the other side lay Russia, Siberian forests stretching in every direction, lazy rivers feeding the massive lake, and quaint little log cabin homes that are cool in summer, hot in winter and give the countryside the feel that your entering some kind of wonderland or fairytale. Its an amazing place to live.

BEHOLD! The Mongolian Navy in all its splendor!

Gandalfs family was very welcoming, but its pretty clear their family by association. This is nothing new though, and everyone was nice. I could see the change to a Siberian diet when they opened the fridge, and tomatoes and cucumber salads were provided with oil for dressing instead of mayonaisse. It was food of the gods. We also had our first beer in a long long time.

In essence the first day we spent in Khank was lost to food and alcohol and the use of a fire to dry our clothing. I didn’t mind it one bit obviously. We spent a whole other day there. Didn’t really do anything other than recover from the alcohol bended and air out our gear. I knew my clothes were starting to really get smelly by then, but I just couldn’t bring myself to ask for a tumpin to wash them in. So they just stayed in the storage red bag and hoped that I didn’t smell THAT bad. I probably did. I also bought from the family one of their summer dells for 11000 tugriks (eight or so bucks) That would save me in so many ways when I got back to UB.

This must be where Stallone trained in Rocky IV!!!!

Hey check it out everyone! I found out where Uncle Jacks Beachouse car ended up....SIBERIA!

Will say this, the family pimped us out with food to go. Bortsuks and hardened curds which made for breakfeast foods we were loaded up on. I also did my part and bought the next round of noodles and breads as I had leeched off his for the past week.

We loaded up on the 8th day and headed out again, we needed to go over the tip of the lake. I guess at this point it’s a good time to talk about terrain. We had ridden over a lot of ground by the 8th day. Some ground rocks, other ground makes you fear for your life. Lets describe some of the ground.

Grassland. Simple as it comes, easy for a horse to ride on, the only thing to watch out for are the tiny little Marmots that scare horses to death and send them instantly on a fear induced running spree. Your 50 times its size you stupid horse! Still, grassland is a piece of cake.

Dirt path. By far the best. Its weathered and hardened, devoid of Marmots who fear being out in the open, and the horses know what it is and how to use it.

Rivers. Not quite as enjoyable. Rivers wi

Blog Entry July 4-15th 2010. Bagkhangai. Mongolia. (You read the location correctly)

Today’s Quote: “It’s only hubris if I fail.” – Gaius Julius Caesar

Rather than backtrack and try and put down a bunch of reactive entries into this blog about my vacation out to Dadal I decided instead to just write it all out in one single entry. Here we go.

Fourth of July started off with a BBQ. The day before I had lucked into a few conversations with some of the fellow M20’s still in town and they informed me that a BBQ party was being thrown somewhere in town. Naturally we all were interested.

Finding the place…now that took finesse. Me and about four or five others (some not even PCV’s but all Americans) got into a taxi and drove to the direct south of the city. If UB had a suburb area it would be this place. Up on the hill, overlooking the city, new buildings, kinda out of the way of all the traffic approaching the city from the north, west and east, yea it’s a suburbia. It also means that this is where private and international schools set up shop. The party was at one such school. Everyone knew kinda where it was but noone knew exactly where…good recipe for walking around. After thinking one building may be it we got out of the taxi, and literally walked in a 5 or so kilometer circle of a huge complex that turned out not to be the place. Fun fun.

We get back in the taxi and tell the driver the same thing we said to the last guy who had only stared at us blankly and in less than two minutes we pulled up to a huge crowd all of which were westerners. BBQ baby!

It turns out that this was the real deal. Hot dogs, hamburgers, real buns, cokes, sprite, a potato sack race and other contest and even the United States Marine Corps brought there marching band instruments as well as some rock and roll equipment. Back when I was a kid I used to attend the fourth of July festivities of the town of Vienna, Virginia. I remember everyone gathering at the playground of Vienna Elementary School and just eating drinking and being merry. I think as a kid all I truly craved was the fireworks but I will say the more you age the more you appreciate your youth. Its funny, I always thought I was going to be angry about how much I didn’t appreciate it but it turns out I just get to enjoy it in some ways now instead. Cool.

Cooler still was who threw this little shindig together. The good people at the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. They were all out in there traditional white shirt, black slacks and nametag looks (in the winter they wear these baddass black cloaks with a white nametag instead. I actually own a similar looking cloak back in the states, and I miss wearing it on random occasions and throwing everyone off) and they all seemed as usual quite chipper and happy. Say what you will about LDS and their beliefs, they threw one really good barbeque. I even got to ask one of the big questions I had had for a while then. While standing in line for food a mid-50 LDS man stood behind me and while waiting in the long line I finally got to ask “when you talk to people from small towns and from the countryside who offer you tea, how do you refuse without being impolite?” He told me such a simple answer it should have come to me before. “We simply say that our faith does not let us drink tea and instead we ask them for some milk.” That’s just brilliant. Your still asking for something to drink that the person makes or bought and therefore still respectable. Dang that’s smart! I even got to meet a handful of Mongolian LDS members dressed up in the white shirt black pants attire as well. That was a first.

There was even beer, which I am sure LDS kindly turned a blind eye to so that we could enjoy a cold one with the great food. Me and the fellow volunteers sat back and relaxed and ate and drank until we were so merry that we all headed back to town by either meeker or walking and felt the wonderful feel of an American culture item taking place even in a land so far far away.

The next day, I made preperations for Dadal…

I knew Dadal had meekers leaving for it, but I didn’t know when or where. I started by going to the Eastern Bus Station. It services the towns out East as well as the treks out into the Gobi. Made sense that’s where the bus would leave from. I found the bus to reach the bus station. It’s come to that. I am so sick of arguing with cab drivers that I have actually worked out the bus schedule to a town I go to less than once a month.

So I get there and ask the booth in my very refined Mongolian when and where is the next bus to Dadal. “You???” (Mongolian for what) says the lady behind the counter. I repeat myself. Another question about what. I try patiently again, getting a weird flashback to that time back in NYC when I needed to get a form signed for medical clearance and noone seemed to let me through the red tape. This time she says “Choir???” (how the hell does Dadal sound like Choir?) and for a fourth time I say Dadal and proceede to make an imaginary map of Mongolia in front of me and to point in the Northeastern portion of the country where I wanted to go and just kept saying “Dadal…DAdal…Duadal…DaHDal…” and on and on and on, literally going on like this for a good fifteen minutes.

This is a real buzz kill whenever I convince myself that my Mongolian is actually conversational. I know I am not the most talented linguist of my class, hell maybe im not even in the top 50%. I don’t pride myself on my ability to learn other languages, hell I even consider it one of my greatest weaknesses and barriers to getting along with so many I encounter and meet, but dammit ive spent a good year REALLY REALLY trying…even I should be able to ask something as simple as a ticket to the town of Dadal without all this!

Finally she asks me for twenty two thousand tugriks, an encouraging sign as that’s how much it said it would cost to get there in my Mongolia book and so I pass her the money and she proceedes to give me a ticket. Luckily I had stopped to read the ticket and saw that she had sent me to Dalanzaghad!!!! (The southern gobi capital! Its 110 degrees down there today!) Finally I tell her wrong and just write the town name down. She reads the piece of paper and I swear to Zeus and all the gods its true when she replied to me by saying “AHHHHH….dadal.” She said in the exact same tone and accent the exact town I had been uttering for the last ten minutes. No difference of any kind whatsoever and she couldn’t understand me. Infuriating….

Luckily I at least found out that the meeker would leave for Dadal tomorrow at Naarantuul Market. So I at least knew where the thing would take off.

….but I sure as hell didn’t know when. I packed up my small backpack (too small) and got my tent assembled and at high noon proceeded to go to the black market. I walked up and down the rows and finally found a bored driver sitting in a meeker with a tiny scribbled “Dadal” sign on it. I said to the driver “you going to Dadal?” He replied in eight or so hours. A smart move would be to retreat back to Nayras café by bus, order another pizza, splurge on a beer and simply comfortably wait this whole thing out.

I’m really not that smart. No I sat in that empty meeker for six hours without a single changing event. Noone came to the empty meeker but me and without books I just sorta sat there. Occasionally walking literally around the meeker but otherwise spending my time just sitting inside the damn meeker wishing it was not so hot outside.

Then, sure as the tide or the rising of the sun, at about 7:50pm, after seven hours of waiting in an empty meeker an army of Mongolians carrying over two tons worth of equipment swarmed down on the meeker. What followed next was an hour of everyone jockeying for both position and for the ability to somehow bend the laws of physics by getting all this equipment into a space that literally is smaller than it. I have lived in this country for over a year. I have seen and done a great many things. I have found that if I wait long enough and pay close enough attention I can begin to understand why things that otherwise do not make sense finally do. However, I do say without fear of contradiction that I have NO idea how they get all the stuff that they do when they pack a meeker. Though I will say that even bored and at that point as uncomfortable as I was I did get a great memory flashback of me and the Jacob’s all driving down to the beach in the minivan. How we used to stuff it with every toy and thing imagineable and how somehow, despite a seat for everyone that THAT seemed like a full car. We don’t change, we just gain more relativity. Remember that!

Well once the laws of physics were literally bent far enough that everyone and everything was inside the car we proceeded to load out. The van only had six seats in the back, and when we left the market it had eight. Definitely a tight fit, but very doable. So we pull out of the black market ninish (by now darkish) and drive three blocks east and….stop to pick up two more adults and two kids. Literally nowhere to put them, but in they must go. The kids sat down on the floor among our feet, but the adults were a frail old lady and man and so somehow, I haven’t a clue how but somehow we found ourselves all in the space built for six people. Now I was uncomfortable….at the start of whats supposed to be at least a 12 hour trip!

Off we go!

Now the problem with driving at night is that you cant see anything out the window. Unlike in most of America much of Mongolia is not inhabited and so on and on and on there just blackness at night. Everyone is uncomfortable and awake still and for five hours I was just repetitively asked “Daar uu???” (are you cold?) I kept saying no and in a meeker of 12 bodies of six seats I sure was warm enough. My leg was also uncomfortably shoved up against the side of the meeker. Nothing about what we did was comfortable, but I also sat on the seat of the meeker by only one ass cheek, requiring me to shuffle every twenty minutes to keep from going insane with discomfort. In the beginning this wasent so bad, but at 2am rolled around one by one the people in the meeker somehow fell asleep. Every time I shuffled they would all awaken, and so I simply sat there, impossibly wedged with my legs screaming silently into the palm of my hand in pain and discomfort as we drove on in the pitch dark.

At three in the morning we stopped to eat at a sorta diner. They stay open for yutzes like us who are traveling to far off places. I hadn’t eaten in over 18 hours, but I really wasent that hungry. It did mean at least that I got out of the meeker for an hour though. I sat and ate Tsuivan and spread my legs as far and wide as they possibly could. That was something to feel after so long. Though a marathon runner I have never had much flexibility above the waist. We were still on the actual paved road between Ondorkhan and UB and I was already in pain. Note to self: Bring Motrin IB next time! Or get drunk to the point of passing out before getting into the car!

We drove on, I think I got about seven minutes of sleep once we loaded back in. The sun came up and I saw were were now off the paved road, and had not even taken the dirt/rock road common past that point. We were on the grass, and only two tire marks led the way. At dawn the rains came, making an already perilous journey treacherous.

You ever notice how rain has almost no bearing on our driving in America? Sure maybe we give ourselves another ten minutes to get somewhere and all that and maybe it’s a tad harder to see outside but by in large with paved roads and brightly lit areas rain is little more than water off a duck to Americans. Without the amazing development which is pavement all roads turn to mush. This is how the Roman Empire grew so mobile and strong for its time….roads.

Well two thousand years later and Mongolia still has yet to get a whole lot of pavement. The journey came to a crawl. The meeker/minivan so designed for bulk transport from one paved city to another and with a weight in it that would have crushed Midas himself was banging along mud and grass heading to some remote and distant town. After twelve hours we came upon a town. It was not Dadal but the town of Bayan-Ovoo. Not even close! Ready for the kicker? The town was butt ugly. Maybe it was the cloudy sky or the more than usually run down Russian buildings but I felt like I was in a ghost town that noone had bothered to leave.

Everyone got out and for the first time I was able to lie down and actually sleep for more than seven minutes. No one seemed to leave the meeker at this point, but I realized that this was only the beginning. Half an hour later we all piled back in and for some reason some of the passengers had bought even more stuff that was crammed inside. My leg was smashed so hard against the side of the minivan I feared for its circulation. Nothing for it…time to go.

And so we trudged on once again. This time not heading north on the gravel/dirt road that exists to the northeast, but instead cutting our own path to the northwest. By midday we reached the town called Bayan-Adraga. It’s a town just before a river that has no bridge. The water is about four feet deep where we crossed it. The minivan stood no chance alone, and so tractors were contracted to pull us through. We were drive straight into the water, water so deep that the water came to one inch from the windows and the side doorway started to flood with river water. I am sure this happened a number of times, but I could just see the tractor breaking down or the cable snapping and all of us slowly drowning among one another in such a place. Not a pleasant thought.

Luckily we made it across the river safe but the next two hours were far more awkward. The rain from earlier that day had made the driving path a swarm of mud pits, all of which we needed to drive through. Some we made it through…some we did not. Ah, the mud push…good times. Lots of great pictures and its exactly like it sounds. Its me and a bunch of other exhausted Mongolian men pushing a minivan in the mud while the women look on at us as if were doing manly things. A tractor had to help us out one time when the meeker got particularly stuck. The track remained muddy for a while but eventually we passed the towns of Binder and Batshireet off in the distance. Though the road at this point was nonexistent and we were literally just driving through the grass I will say that I was rather impressed with the scenery of the place. Though in some ways much like where I lived the number of lakes and trees gave much more ambiance to the area. I could see how such a place would make people appreciative of nature. But by this point I had been traveling for over 18 hours (over 24 if you count the time waiting at Naarantuul) The final six hours of the journey were overkill. Tempers were starting to run high in the meeker too as conversations started to run into towns and families reputations. I luckily played the fool and said nothing. I had also abandoned my seat and had put my backpack in my lap and took up seating on the thin space between the drivers seat and the back seats. Still, watching one hill lead to another, the endless nothing in every direction and the feeling as though you have been at this for all time can be a daunting feeling. Evening was coming and I just wanted it all to come to an end. It wasent.

There were these moments where the driver began to lose his patience and was driving VERY VERY aggressively too. We would drive off the mud section and into the grass portions. The vehicle was moving fast and there were these very scary periods of mud skiing taking place where the tires would get clobbered in mud and we would find a turn in the “road” and glide onto the grass where the mudded tires had no traction and we found ourselves fishtailing in an impressively top heavy car out in the middle of nowhere. Each and every time we blissfully did not hit anything or simply flip over as I was so certain we would. Yea that was a scary bit.

Then…as the number of trees grew and after all hope had been lost of reaching the town by nightfall one final massive hill was scaled by the beaten up minivan and with a final lurch we crossed back onto a gravel/dirt road….DADAL…was finally found.

35 hours. That’s how long it took us to go about 350 kilometers, as the eagle flies anyway. Heres a good way of thinking about it. Imagine driving from Northern Virginia to the beaches on the border of North and South Carolina. Okay. Got the image of the road in your head (dad I know you got that hardwired by now) Okay so start driving out of Vienna, Virginia. Take the highway out of town, head south on 95 and enjoy a lightly traveled road. Doing good? Okay, now pass the town of Fredricksburg…and that’s where the road ends. No dirt or gravel…ENDS! Imagine trying to drive the rest of the way without a road. That’s what this was like….oh I almost forgot, take the contents of your house and stuff them ALL into your car along with you.

…I made it to Dadal….and I had no idea where to stay.

Technically I had a tent and all I had to do was walk to one of the random woods surrounding the town and pitch tent for the night, but Naadam was tomorrow and I wanted a guesthouse so I could put my stuff down during the day and enjoy myself, but I found myself without such an option if I camped. I wanted to find pretty much the only open guesthouse in the town, but the place had no phone number, and I had no map of the town or even an idea of where the place was. All I had was a name and a job. His name was Dorjsuren, and he was a retired mathematics teacher. I started to ask around town about the guy and all I ever got was random people pointing in some direction and saying “teend” (there) NOT helpful!

I was tired, hungry, unshaven, my leg hurt and most of all it was 8:30pm and getting dark outside. I had all but resigned myself to the countryside. I was walking out of the town cranky and miserable. It was a terrible start to what had already been a most trying couple of days…and then there was a woman.

What is it about women? How can a single woman have so much influence on a single persons future by doing nothing other than simply being there? Is it their whimsical ways? Their ability to bring us to reason and sense when we would otherwise not have it? Their talent in driving us insane and making us crazy when we are otherwise sated? Is it how they encourage bad habit in us when we are turning over new leaves, or how they guilt us away from our vices when we indulge? Is it the way they smile at us and all out Ego goes out the window? Is it how amazed we are that such fire and ire can come from so small a package? Are we bewildered by the way in which women do things in their bodies like traveling alone to Dadal that my physically more powerful body was barely able to survie? Is it that in every woman we meet we can find something to gawk at and be drawn to? Or is it that I just found a beautiful being before me who saved my entire first vacation from being a complete and total mopefest… I cant say. Probably more of that last one more than anything though.

All I can say is that I met a girl that evening on my way out of town. A local hashaa guy had pointed at a building when I had said Dorjurens name and had also blathered the word for inside during his rant. I walked over to the old abandoned factory to find that it was in fact a renovated culture center and a series of musical and dance performances were going on as we spoke. I walked along the entrance doors believe the guesthouse owner was somewhere inside and that’s when I saw this pretty young woman. She was smoking a cigarette and seemed so out of place. It took me a second but I caught on pretty quick and realized that while Asian she was most certainly not a Monoglian. She stood like someone impatient about something and when I went over and asked in Mongolian if she spoke English she replied “teem” (yes) and I realized she knew as much Mongolian as I did. I asked if she knew a man named Dorjsuren and at that moment the clouds in the sky parted and a beam of light shone down on her as she replied with a willowy reed of a voice.

“…yes, I am staying at his guesthouse.”

::queue music fanfare::

:::Rose petals rained down around us.:::

The Sky Father and Earth Mother had blessed me with a goddess…after having a little fun of having me run all over town for the past hour but still…a goddess in the end!

Dorjsuren was inside watching the festivities and so I spent the next hour chatting up the pretty young savior of mine. Her name was Esther (she has a Chinese name as well but she would only tell me it once…her names Esther dammit!). She’s a 26 year old traveling worker from Hong Kong. She spoke Cantonese, Mandarin, English and she had been living and working/volunteering in Hong Kong for over four months and spoke about as much Mongolian as I did. She too…had chosen Dadal as some random location of Mongolia she had not yet had the pleasure of visiting and thought it would be a great place to see a small town Naadam take place.

Great minds ladies and gentlemen…we do tend to think alike.

Eventually as night fell Dorjsuren finally emerged and with Esthers permission I was welcomed to the guesthouse as well. We were driven pretty far to the corner of the town (about five kilometers away) and there was the cabin. There are very few gers found in the northeastern section of the country. I can see the reasons why. Lots of trees for wood, cold in the summer inside a log house, hot in the winter, more space and since they don’t have to be as mobile as they did in the nomadic days of old the houses are quite nice. Inside the guesthouse cabin was four beds and only me and Esther were each others company. The bed was a spring mattress setup and though a little too flexible for my taste I was so sleep deprived at this point that many times what I heard Mongolians say would come off as English to my brain. Pretty cool actually when you think about it. But after brushing the fur off my teeth I fell into a coma at 9pm that night.

I awoke feeling like I had been dripped in the fountain of youth. My whole body felt energized and alive. A quick shave and some water in my hair gave me a clean feel as well. I am not a Buddhist, nor do I align myself to any particular faith of this world. Heck I even find philosophies in Star Wars literature by authors like Matthew Stover to have some merit and use in them so I am the last to advocate people to believe in any doctrines or thoughts on how to live out our lives. What brings one of us joy would be seen as insane to another and what makes that person happy would be the hell incarnate (me and my sister are an excellent example of this)

I do however feel that the difference of those two days demonstrates a key argument of the beliefs of the Buddha. That there is suffering, and that said suffering is in every form of life and living that exists. In essence I agree that everything is a form of suffering. For example, when I was in the meeker those past two days with my leg crammed horribly against the side to the point that when I woke up that morning I had a bruise running up my entire calf, this was a form of suffering called pain. I was in a position that if I continued to allow myself to remain in such a position it would continue to be perceived as pain by my mind. I could temporarily end that suffering by shuffling my position, but then if I waited another hour that position too would become painful and I would have to move again to avoid pain.

Pain…

Pain is not so much suffering as it is in it of itself a God in some ways. It is the instructor and master of every sentient being on this planet. From Presidents to single cell organisms. A worm knows that if it hurts to go one direction it will go in the other. It’s the fuel in the engine of change of this world. If Joan of Arc had not felt the pain of war, she would have lived out her days as a carefree child and England may yet still be ruling France or if the Holocaust had not taken place Jewish sympathy and motivation would never have reached levels high enough to create a Jewish state and if the Jewish state had not been created then Yasser Arafat would have lived out his life as a comfortable landlord and on and on and on in a never ending cycle of pain and change. We hurt and hurt and hurt until…finally…someone does something about it.

More than that though is you realize pleasure to be suffering as well. When we feel dirty we shower, and then we don’t feel dirty anymore, but soon we will feel dirty again. If you go from showering once a month to showering once a day those showers once a day will not feel as satisfying to you than if you hadn’t showered for a day. Pleasure has no baseline that you can perpetually maintain. We eat because we are hungry, but once again we will feel hungry. I miss wine, and when I finally get to drink a good sip of the stuff the first taste will be like ambrosia. Yet when I return to America and drink wine with dinner each night it will lose that first time experience of bliss and will require more to satisfy me. In essence comfort and luxury are suffering for a simple reason. They do not last.

Buddha used this and found that the only way not to feel the suffering was not to react to anything differently than anything else. To an enlightened person. The sitting in that car should bring no other feeling of comfort than sleeping in that nice springy bed or drinking a cup of wine. I have obviously not reached that level…but the understanding of how or what is required of you to find your center is a good first step.

Well that’s a conversation I had with Esther that first night and it seemed like a good place to put it in this entry. But for that day though we had something bigger and grander to look at … and that was NAADAM BABY!!!!!

Me and Esther got there in time for the opening ceremony. It was a tad more regal than the ceremony I went to in Erdene last summer. This one included men on horseback taking the yak haired banners to the center of the naadam ring where soldiers took control of the banners and had them planet next to the flag both of Monoglia and of the region (which has an uncanny resemblance to the flag of Germany…which gave me a great laugh) Actually most peoples summer dells from the area have the same three colored insignias as well. Its is supposed to represent something regarding if the people of the town have been bestowed an honor of some kind. I didn’t get an accurate enough answer out of those who responded. After that the games sort of took off. The first day of wrestling was kind of childish though. The people wrestling ranged from sumo to kids not even ten years old. Unlike last year I decided to sit this year out. I didn’t know this town, and so my involvement may have been less warmly received. Also, had I got hurt here in some ways (some wrestlers this year in fact did!) that would have been a pain in the ass to explain to Peace Corps that I needed them to pick me up from some far off and distant soum because I decided I wanted to wrestle. The horse races were rather competitive though and I really like them.

Esther was a huge fan of horses and often when I was watching the wrestling match at the top of the stands she was looking the opposite direction to the outside where all the horses were racing around. To each their own.

That night the two of us got drunk on cheap beer. It was just the two of us and Esther once again broke every Asian steryotype I was ever told. Shes half my weight and drank as much as I did. She swore, quite well in fact too. She smoked quite a bit and most amusing of all…she had never heard of how you can use the big dipper to find the North Star. We spent the night sitting on the step of the guesthouse drunkenly pointing at stars and making ones up. I will admit it got a little lewd near the end as we pretty much just stared making up body parts of Greek and Roman gods in the sky. I asked her if the Chinese had any constellations and she proceeded to rant at me about how much she disliked mainland China and wanted to know why the USA let mainland China push them around so much.

That was the first time id ever heard someone with that point of view from Asia so it took a moment to adjust. I explained to her that places like Hong Kong and Taiwan are very close to the mainland and therefore easier for them to influence. I explained to her that outside of Chinas immediate space Chinas power quickly diminishes and therefore while centrally a force to be reckoned with internationally China is not as strong as others make it out to be.

This answer pleased her and coupled with both the booze and the promise that with working English, Mandarin and Cantonese she could easily find a home in America we resigned ourselves to talking about the World Cup instead.

The second day of Naadam was much like the second, but our guesthouse was joined by two other nice ladies from Italy. They were both in their 30’s and working their way through the world, as do many who wind up between China and Russia. They seemed nice enough and we all found the next day a driver willing to take us back to UB. That evening I explained that on the road home was the town of Erdene, my home last summer.

So what was going to be me all alone ended up being all of us pledging to camp in my family’s yard the following day. The bus back to Erdene the next day was late. We would have complained but after waiting at the Naarantuul Market sitting on the step of a log cabin you’ve been sleeping in with three beautiful women with the Siberian woods in plain sight believe me when I say that I endured.

The trip back was a godsend compared to the last one. No three towns to visit this time around. No we headed Northeast out of town for about two or three hours (the sunny three days before had dried up the mud and made that transport a whole lot easier) and then we turned onto a gravel/rock road of sorts. The scenery was the steppes. The long endless feel that in every direction eternity lurked. People lost out at sea often talk about how daunting the world appears when you can see nothing. It works the same on land too…its just a lot harder to find a place like that. I will say this though, it is a beautiful world. Ive already seen enough of Mongolia to know how gorgeous this place is, but each of Mongolias rolling hills needs to be seen for its own uniqueness in it.

On and on the hills rolled by and the further we drove the more solid the road became. We made excellent time, and the bus was not like last time stuffed to the rafters. There were only seven of us traveling in a space built for six. We could have done that standing on our heads. We reached Ondorkhan by 5pm, which meant we now had a paved road all the way back to Erdene. The Monolian passengers of the vehicle started to buy alcohol at this point and the journey got a little less pleasant. The ladies didn’t drink so they wanted me to do so and while I don’t mind drinking I just on that day really wasent in the mood for vodka. I hate vodka…

Hours rolled by, and though I had hoped to be at my moms house by sundown our driver at 9pm got a little peckish and stopped at a roadside restaurant for a two hour dinner. This meant that as we rolled up to Erdene it was practically midnight. As I stated, theres no real outside light at night in this country. I knew my moms house would be one of the first houses we came across, and so I found myself exhausted and hungry trying to use my flashlight to spot the house. Luckily the green roof was hard to forget and I flagged the driver down exactly where we needed to stop.

It was too late to get food (though we had all not eaten at the restaurant in hopes of getting some) and my mom was asleep. But my sister did let us all sleep on the floor of the main room, and so as it were two Italian girls, a Hong Kong volunteer woman and a Peace Corps volunteer found themselves snoring in the TV room of the Peace Corps volunteers families home…you know some moments in life just cant be captured well by camera.

We woke up famished and conversational. My mother was looking very sturdy and well as usual…but my sister. Geeze!!!! My sisters looks change a lot. Last time I had seen her in January she had sheared her hair to swim team length. Now the hair had grown back but as she was immediately heading to the city she had decided to dress up in the most ridiculous outfit. It looked like something women from a Cosmo magazine would have worn in the 1960’s or something.

As usual I said nothing aside from the fact that she looked well.

We went on a quick hike up the big hill in the town so the ladies could get a good view of the place. They enjoyed the hike and I just liked the company and the chance to see the town again. However, we were pressed for time and we all wanted to get over to UB to run some errands.

We got lucky and got a couple eager and cheap drivers to drop us right off at the guesthouse we had luckily gotten space in. At this point we all separated and ran our errands for the day. For me the big one was going to Peace Corps office and finally getting the Ger power cord that they had been unwilling to ship and that was needed before I could move into a ger. The box was heavy as hell, and tourism life from the past week had made me weak, but I got it back to the guesthouse. I took a shower and put on a new shirt for the first time in over a week. Everyone who knows me can vouch I have a VERY weak sense of smell. It was a pain in the ass when I was an RD and couldn’t tell if people had been smoking pot. Yet when I got out of that old shirt, showered and put on new clothes I held the old shirt up to my nose and took a whiff…

KNOCKED ME DOWN!

I am not saying this for dramatic effect, I literally stumbled back and fell onto my bed. That was rank! I wonder if the ladies just hadn’t said anything or they had smelled as lovely as me having been traveling for a week. What the hell am I going to smell like when I go to Hovsgul Nuur for three weeks? A sink washing turned up grey water for five or so minutes and then I hung it out to dry. Wolf!

So the next day the Italians and I parted ways, and I can only hope to get facebooked by them at some point. Esther however, was coming with me. Not wanting to be in UB for Naadam and since we were still getting along pretty damn well she decided to see what my town looked like. We got out of the city with no time to spare as it was the start of Naadam. My soum looked so quiet after all the hubbub from the last week. Esther was bummed I hadn’t moved into a ger yet but as she has lived in a ger for over a month back in May it wasent like she was missing out.

There wasent much to show her around town. We walked along the Air Force Base and I introduced her to a handful of the Peace Corps Volunteers who we bumped into. Mostly we just hung out. I have no idea why I got along so well with her. We just clicked, and I was truly grateful for the company. I started to realize that my personality is not one that rapidly enounters people. I don’t make best friends with those I see the most by default like many others I know do. No, it takes a particular set of circumstances for me to really meet someone I like, especially now and where ive been. Its lonely, and I don’t really mind that but I do think that every once and a while you need to connect to someone like that. It reminds you of how your supposed to feel. Alas, work called her, and by the following day she had to head out. We plan to meet again in June, and I certainly want to see her again.

After I saw her off in a meeker I called up my boss Baasansuren. Enough was enough, it was time to move. I told her in my broken Mongolian that I had her power switch thingy, and ten minutes later after she had picked me up in her car and they took a power indicator from my apartment we drove to Bagkhangai.

…the ger….

It was shiny and new and dead smack in the middle of a smallish yard. The ger itself is also rather small. It’s a four wall ger, fairly common but in terms of height its also rather short. About four and a half feet tall at the widest part and I can only stand upright near the center of the ger. This doesn’t bother me at all. First off it makes me feel sort of like a giant, but also in the winter this smaller space will be MUCH easier to heat. The ger was bareboned and empty, but as I opened the box and handed her the power equipment she told me to pack my bags as tomorrow morning I was moving.

Its strange…I had thought forward to this for a while. Ever since I moved into my apartment, which I grew to love and appreciate I knew that it was home only for a year. Ive been so excited about moving that you can probably find a ger reference in every single blog entry I have made. I had been delayed twice from moving (on June 1st they hadn’t even bought the ger yet let alone built it) and suddenly in one fell swoop I found myself moving the next day.

That’s a good reference to life in some ways. The majority of time we spend looking forward to something happening that feels like it never gets there. Then, something big happens suddenly but your so mellowed from the waiting that it suddenly takes you off guard. Lifes a funny thing…

Packing was not easy. I got a lot of stuff. Where the hell did all this come from? I looked at the pile of care package boxes and got my answer. In essence I got a ton of books, all of which I love (thank you mom, dad, Eric #dude Dresden is a lifesaver# and of course myself for the Star Wars books) along with a winter dell, kitchen gear, food, and many other things.

I woke up the next morning to a knock on my door…time to move. The jijuurs from the school disassembled my bed and carted stuff downstairs into the large van that we use to transport students between schools. It’s a big van, and I still filled it up pretty good. It started to downpour just as we drove off for Bagkhangai.

We pulled into the house and began the ballet of room arrangement. Gers traditionally are set up in a particular order, with your bed at 3oclock and your shrine at 12 oclock and so on. Many PCV’s have less orthodox living styles but I personally felt that if I didn’t like it I could move it all around later so I left the Mongolians to do my decorating for me. The system, like all things Mongolian is based on practicality and order. By the time the Mongolians were done arranging there was still a huge pile of boxes in the center with books and other things they had no idea where they should go. I told them I could handle all of that later (my stove is still not installed and is outside my ger, but its not like I need a fire at the moment and for the time it gives me more space.) As the women filed out to the house in the yard for tea I looked at the jijuur guys who had broke quite a sweat helping me move and knowing full well that if I offered money they would refuse I said the magic words.

“Airag uu?” (want some vodka?) They all grinned. I pulled out a 3/4ths full bottle and they drank it up in under five minutes. I definitely won parting gift points with that! The ladies concluded their tea and the men snuck away with them mildly drunk…and so after all the shuffling I found myself….home….again… wow I move a lot.

Finding a place for everything was a little tricky. I didn’t want to put my books on the floor but it was not like I had a whole lot of choice in the matter. I made a big stack so if a flood happens they wont all get wet. I put some clothes in the dresser but the majority are still in the bags under my bed and my little knick knacks are all back on my dresser including the great Jacobs/Matthews pictures (got one of us at Oktoberfest too Eric) The gers size suits me. When I had lived in the apartment it felt like I had too few things in too big of a space. Now everything fits just about right.

I finally threw the final box aside and sat on my bed (at 3oclock in the ger) and it all came to me. One of those flood moments where you really get caught up in the moment and I realized that I truly had moved into a tent. All my bitching and whining at the beginning about my placement. About my shitty luck and the stomping of my feet and here I am with absolutely everything I wanted all over again. When will I stop making bad first impressions and learn my lesson already that if your patient it will all work out? Probably never. Alas…here I sit, you may have noticed…its been one hell of a couple weeks.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it!!!

This was one of the "safer" tractor pulls i went through during the trip. We got stuck and had to push ourselves through the mud often enough as well, but i dont have pictures of that as i was pushing the bloody meeker!

Archery Baby!

The military guys take the banners from the horsemen, though one horse had better ideas. That drop was such a party foul!

Believe it or not, ALL of that is going to fit into the meeker. And twelve bodies in the back seat! Now drive...FOR TWO DAYS!!!!!

The road to Dadal (if you call it a road) Things got ugly!

I woke up the morning after being sardined into a stuffed meeker for two days with a bruise the size of Nebraska on my calf. Ouch

A beautiful woman from Hong Kong named Esther. She is the reason that my Dadal vacation was so successful. What is it about women and their ability to make and break everything?

Okay look closely! Esther is stone sober when this picture was taken. The beer shes holding is not even open. We had come back from the first day of Naadam exhausted and the hot hosher we were eating knocked us both out before we could even start to drink...we drank them the next day. Hehe

One of our fellow travelers back to UB. I know it was pitch dark so we didnt see this until we had stopped for dinner at 11pm, but nice hand placement pal...

Okay so a Peace Corps American, a Hong Kong volunteer worker and two random Italian ladies find themselves sleeping in a Binet style log cabin in a small Mongolian town during the Naadam celebration... again, no punchline here thats just funny as hell.

Naadam Baby!!!! Dadal setup was a little swankier. We had stands to sit in and they actually had the horsemen with Yak hair standards march into the grounds. One of the horsemens horses was wild and wouldnt be approached without going crazy. It was really funny actually.

The Mongolia treat their military with a great deal of respect, and they are hard workers, but everytime i see them on display i get the feeling there this tin soldier mentality. Still, they are the ones who plant the yak standards after the horses have carted them in

When you live in a quiet town like mine when you bring a pretty girl along theres not a whole lot to show her. I settled for taking her out to the Air Force Base. The mound we are sitting on is one of the bunkers that used to house Soviet Migs....my how the mighty fall huh...

Nice archery shot taken by Esther. This town made a bigger show of archery than other towns. Good for them. I wonder why this is not as popular...must have to do with Temujin getting shot with an arrow in his war against China.

I took my new tent out for a test outside of Ondortolge before i left for my vacation in Dadal. This is me ten kilometers outside of town. It looks like that in every direction. You dont need to travel far to be in the middle of nowhere in Mongolia.

This isnt a vacation photo but the packages my mother and stepfather sent me. Hey Eric, apparently your package is the only one that the Mongolian postal service decided to randomly inspect. Mustive been a Dresden Files fan too.

June 7, 2010. Naarantuul Market, Ulaanbaatar Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Ahhhh….thatll make your bull run!” –Simpsons character talking about drinking wiskey from a civil war flask.

Sitting in a nearly empty meeker at 1 in the afternoon waiting for it to fill so I can go home and get some sleep. I can already tell I wont have the energy to write a blog entry when I get back. When you get done reading my next entry I hope you will be able to understand why. Ill try and update it tomorrow. Its not like ill have much else to attend to at that point given that its unlikely Ill be sent to my Ger sometime next week…unless that falls through as it so far has every single time.

June 8, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “To become the god that you are, that we all are. To know no bounds and to never fade away…” -Ilyria

THAT…was one hell of a weekend. It all began on Thursday when I got to UB. I posted the blog and got myself posted with a new blog entry. It was another long one and I even threw on the video of Lewis Black shouting THE @#*$&%* PEACE COPRS as well. Thursday I needed to relax, and relax I did. I got a load of laundry done and I sat in Nayras doing my usual thing of internet after not having access for a long period of time. Fun fun…

I woke up Friday and headed over to the Bayanor Hotel to get registered for the Marathon. Technically I had not signed up yet so I had a faint fear that I would be denied entry or something even though the form said we could register on the fourth. I get to the bib pick up spot and find out that its run by Germans. Instantly I lighten up but then something happened. Something I didn’t think even existed. Unicorns probably exist, someone can probably even demonstrate speed reading if we asked around long enough. Yet what happened in that hotel lobby rocked the very foundation of my life….

I stood before them and tried English to ask for a registration form…and they stared at me blankly. I had met Germans (plural!!!) who didn’t speak English. I know how arrogant I am to have assumed that but after all the time I had spent traveling both to Germany and to other foreign countries where I met Germans I had never met a single one who had not spoken English. Though a year ago I took German courses without constantly practicing a language the specific words I had needed were lost to me. So unless I needed to tell them that their car was black or that I needed a beer I had encountered a language barrier.

Mongolian saved me. They had a translator working with them, who didn’t speak English. However, he did speak German and Mongolian…This is too complicated to even be ironic. The Germans would say something, the translator told it to me in Mongolian which I then mentally translated into English so I could respond in my Mongolian to the translator who brought it back to German. The term “going the long way around” never seemed to apply more than in that moment!

Here I am wishing for a good portion of my adult life that I would have mastered the German tongue and here I am talking to a German translator in Mongolian. Seriously I would ask for the form in Mongolian, he would translate it in German and then I got the form. We had to have a similar dance with money. Weak as the media would have us believe the US dollar is still the de facto currency of our current times. When traveling through South East Asia back in 2006 many of the cheap hostels I stayed at in Cambodia and Vietnam would not take the Riel or Dong and would only take US dollars. The marathon organizers wanted me to pay the entry fee in dollars too. All I had were Tugriks. Luckily with some more Mongolian translating I was able to get them to accept Tugriks for an added amount of money. Of goodie! I had my bib and the race started at 8am.

After that major translation job I went over to the information area and saw something that didn’t quite add up. I saw the race course and while the information was all in German I luckily learned how to read German very well two years ago. The race course had changed. No longer would we be running in and around the city. I was actually glad to see that. The idea that they would shut down all the roads in the city for six hours on a Saturday was absurdity. What I saw and read though made even less sense….no…. well get to that when we reach the race. I will tell you then.

With the packet in hand I had the rest of Friday to rest up and prep up. Marathons are psychological in nature. Once you run as long as I have your lungs and legs will make it no matter what. Your brain on the other hand needs some convincing. I had done this four times before and always felt the exact same way. The day before a marathon you worry and wonder how the hell you can pull this off. I needed something to take my mind off it, and I found it.

Friday night was a concert. Sukbaatar Square lit up as everyone and their uncle went to a free concert in the center of UB, which in essence constitutes the center of the country as Mongolia is in essence a city state. The warmup bands drew very few numbers, but there was an appearance by The Lemons. They were great, and as a fan I liked hearing them. They did some of their less known songs too and so we all got a treat. The main event was an American band. OZ…something. Sorry I didn’t know them, but they came from LA and were fans with a horse violinist and a throat singer from Mongolia so they came to perform.

I was with fellow volunteers and the crowd reaction was rather comical. While outwardly I find Mongolians very expressive I will say that in concerts Mongolians are statues. They don’t clap along, they don’t dance (not even the wild celery dance!) they don’t sing and they don’t even really clap. Americans do, and the only Americans in that crowd were from the Peace Corps. Peace Corps Americans REALLY get into it. We created our own little dance floor on Sukbaatar Square, and ten minutes into the concert more people were watching us than the band. We rock.

Better still was near the end of the concert. The horse violinist started to break out a little and the lead guitarist started going one on one with the horse violinist. It was a Mongolian version of Deliverance. While I am sure the meaning was lost on the Mongolians, even they could understand it was an American and a Mongolian dueling. At long last the Mongolians started to get psyched up in the crowd.

By far the highlight came at the end. The lead singer and the throat singer did a duel of voices. The American was hopelessly outmatched. You have to hear throat singing to believe it. It’s a noise that you seriously question if it should be coming out of someone. The American basically sang along as the Mongolian dude literally held one note for over a minute. I apologize for not having any pictures, but I didn’t think to bring one for the performance. Wouldn’t do the scene justice anyway. Standing in the crowd and watching the two guys go at it I had to sorta remind myself that I was in the Peace Corps at that point. I felt like I was at the MCI Center or something watching something I would have spent hundreds to see. It was one hell of an amazing night.

Saturday morning. Marathon Morning… I woke up before my 6:30am alarm. Went through the yoga poses and stretched as much as I dared. Ate my first powerbar and luckily cleansed out my body (one of the harder things to time so that you don’t feel the need during the race) It was an ugly day outside. Seriously ugly. Raining already and the clouds were not scattered as they often are but instead littered the sky. Though not pretty the fact that the temperature had dropped was very helpful. It would help to keep me hydrated and capable of running.

I got to the starting line of Sukbaatar Square ready to roll. Before the race we had an opening speech, this one in German and Mongolian. We were asked to hold up signs indicating our countries of origin. Germany had every other country beat put together including Mongolians. They had someone sign up from Singapore who did not show, so for a while I held that flag. A dude who organizes the US embassies kid running club was doing the 5K with a bunch of little ones, but the only one there from America going the long way was myself. The only American running in an International Marathon. That’s a little intimidating.

Well we gathered at the starting line as the rain started picking up a little and off we went along Peace Avenue on the newly designed running course….

How do I put this so its relative to you? Think for a moment about the island of Manhattan. A drop of space smaller than a quarter of the area of Ulaanbaatar, and home to more people than this entire country has and then some. Think of how many people commute to that tiny island every day. Buses, trains, bridges, hell even ferries. You got the list? I do. Brookyln, Manhattan and GW Bridge. Now the Staten Island Ferry and the two tunnels. I think the one up on third avenue to the Bronx as well. Also the subways that lead to the Bronx and Brooklyn. Finally the trains that go from Jersey straight to Penn. Think of all those ways in and out of the island. Now shut every one of them down. Not stall, stop them. ALL of them. Every, single, one! That’s what they did to UB and Eastern Mongolia. In the countryside there are very few cars. I figure my main road as one of the busier ones and on average no more than one car travels down the road a minute. Inside UB the roads are a honeycombed mess allowing experienced drivers to slither through certain parts of the city without touching a main road, but the Peace Avenue. By far the only thing that constitutes a main road in Mongolia. It cuts the city and even the whole country in half literally. Keep following Peace Avenue long enough West and youll pass the Dragon Bus Station and three or so days later your going to reach Olgii next to the border with Kazakstan and keep going East on Peace Avenue and you will pass Nalikh and go straight to Choivolsan in the East on the border with China. Peace Avenue is the one and only artery that is commercialism and traffic in this country….

They shut it down.

For five hours on a Saturday morning they shut down Peace Avenue. I know the previous idea of running throughout the city would have been difficult. This was just flat out insane. To intensify the insanity I add this. There are fifty three of us! This is not the NY Marathon where tens of thousands are running. No there were just over fifty of us. We didn’t need one lane of traffic let alone the whole thing, but that’s what they did. On the way out of town on Peace Avenue we could see all the cars they had already stopped up. Drivers sat outside their cars angrily wondering what the hell was going one hour into the run. After an hour I had reached the outskirts of the city and were running out into the countryside.

Actually this is the exact road I take between my site and UB. It’s the road that goes to Nalikh and then on to Bagkhangai and beyond. By this point there were no cars to stop, everyone knew the roads were closed to the UB. The east was sealed off from UB, for no other road led to it but the ones we were running on. The faster runners were on their way back and with only 50 or so running (a few marathoners had bailed) I was at the back of the pack alright. I run a 10 minute mile and I am near the last of the runners. Morale booster! Better still by the time I hit the halfway point and turned around I couldn’t even see where the next runner was they were so far ahead of me. Not good.

By the third hour I had a wall hit. If you’re a runner you know what this means. At some point in every race your body feels as though its encountered a wall and you simply cannot take another step. The feeling of this “wall” takes on many forms. Some just feel like all the warmth in your body got sucked out while others feel that their legs are no longer connected to their bodies. I on the other had had a different type of wall experience then I had before. Someone shot me in the legs. The right a little bit more than the left, but yea. Someone full on took out a gun, pointed it at my thighs and just went BAM!

I didn’t fall over, but my jog became a run and a walk. By this time, I had reached the city limits again. It was hour four, people were pissed. I mean Mongolians are emotional and don’t like stupid things. Four lanes of traffic were closed off and I was the only person on the streets besides the cops. People were seriously pissed, and while I didn’t draw the race course and agreed with their assessment of the race course EVERYONE blamed me. So in addition to having bullets shot through the muscle in both my legs I also felt the hated jeers of every stranded body and car in UB. Not fun. I crossed the finish line with a final burst to finish just under five hours. Not my slowest marathon ever but if I hadn’t had that sudden onset burn I could have done better.

….the name is Josh Jacobs. Teacher, Pisces, former vegetarian who in a year will never eat meat again… oh yea and FIVE TIME MARATHON MAN!!!!!!!

….better still. I know its because of extraneous circumstances but I finished FIRST PLACE FOR AMERICANS in an INTERNATIONAL MARATHON! As I said its because im the only American but yea…first place.

Caitlin was there at the finish line to cheer me on. She so rocked. Though I should have predicted at the end of a run that long that your in such pain that you make awful company. Still she took pictures and helped me limp back to my guesthouse. Its funny, I sort of walked like those Mongolian men whose legs don’t quite work so well anymore. No medal, not even a T-Shirt!!! What the hell? Ah well, as I expressed to Caitlin I will make a medal out of yogurt caps and paperclips like they did on that episode of the Office. And I have my racing bib, that makes for a good souvenir.

No blisters on my feet from this race. After running as long as I have your feet tend to callus up some. The pain I had experienced during the race subsided from being centralized in my thigh muscle to being just a general discomfort all around. More amazing was just how tired I became once I got back to the guesthouse. My body had been running red hot and now I needed to shower and get into warm clothes and covers as my bodys immune system was gonna be pretty weak during the next few hours. (this is why ive gotten mono several times before, this happens to a lot of runners actually) went to bed at 2 or so and woke up at 7ish. I was still really tired, but I had one other thing to do that Saturday.

While I had been down below running, seventy five or so noobs were coming. Gotta go wave hello at the airport. I hadn’t been to the airport since last year when I had arrived at 2 or so in the morning. It was still light out as we approached the airport, and I had my first American flash back in Gods knows how long. Chingis Khans airport is the splitting image of Washington Dulles International Airport. The layered drop off pick up spots and the arch stuff. I know other airports have a similar design as this, but when you lived outside of IAD your whole life the building sorta sticks with you. I even saw that airport before I left for LA even though I left from Regan Airport (again sorry mom) so seeing the airport during the day was cool. When we got inside it turns out a LOT of 20’s and 19’s had come to be the welcome wagon.

An added bonus was that the security camera of people getting off the plane from Seoul was displayed in the pickup lobby. So though they couldn’t see us, the 20’s got to see the M21’s walking through the airport for the first time. They were all so clean and full of smiles. One of the guys was even taking pictures of himself. I imagine we also looked like that when we first got there, but they just seemed so young to me. It was at this point I realized that we really were at the halfway point of so. That there were now Peace Corps Volunteers who had been in this country a shorter time than the 20’s had. It rattled my train of thought as to how that could be possible. I felt as though I had just stepped off the plane last week. I know I have done so much and encountered so much, BUT A YEAR!?!

Id have stewed on it longer but by that time the entry doors opened and the first new volunteers did what I did a year ago. They walked out into a crowd of cheering volunteers such as myself…WELCOME TO THE PEACE CORPS!!!!!

Their reactions to this welcome wagon were mixed. Many just smiled and tried to hide their intimidation and confusion. One amusing soul seemed so surprised that it looked like she was trying to turn her cart so she could go back the way she came. One of the best responses I saw came from a guy who hiked up his backpack and ran through the crowd of cheerers giving hardcore high fives and shouting Hell Yea as he ran by. Good for him, good for them all. With that group of seventy five (supposed to be 76 but one pulled the plug) we suddenly still had all the M20’s and a substantial number of M19’s left.

Mongolia is chock full of Peace Corps volunteers. Kick ass!

Some of the PCV’s were headed to the nightclub that we frequent when in UB for more celebrating, but having stood on my feet for two more hours to welcome the M21’s I didn’t trust myself, and luckily I found four others going home so I split a cab with them. I went to bed at 11:48pm and woke up sometime around 10ish. It was incredible to sleep uninterrupted for so long. Especially on a bouncy mattress and in warm sheets. I could never do it justice with words, but do you remember how you felt looking at Frodo resting in that huge bed after he gets saved from Mount Doom? Remember how you felt as though it made up for all the nights he had spent trekking Mordor and sleeping on the rocky ground? You personally hadn’t experienced any of it and yet you were so happy and comfortable seeing him now resting? That’s how I felt, or the closest I can express it.

Sunday afternoon was a day of calories. I don’t recall just how many pizzas I ate but I do remember having breakfeast with Caitlin and remembering just how much I apologized for not being as polite as I should have been to her at the marathon. Being the kick ass chick that she is she accepted the apology and turned the conversation to things we had left to do for the summer. We are ambitious individuals I will give ourselves that.

Sunday night was pawned off on alcohol. Granted its sorta become a traditon of mine after marathons to drink a lot. Something about chasing that DVT. After pounding my legs for as long as I had in a race, the chance of a clot increases. If a piece of that clot travels up to your heart you can have a heart attack and all that stuff. Now being under 30 minimizes this risk, so to up the stakes you can always drink alcohol and have a few cigs. With two fellow volunteers in hand, we tore up the bars, big time. LOTS of beer. I am sorta glad I didn’t drink the night before as I was way too tired to have done so successfully. Waiting a day gave me my constitution, and the company I went out with rocked. Gods I love beer, but worst still I miss wine. Still, the stuff was liquid ambrosia. And we drank till we started ranting at one another about random things and giggling about abstract nonsense. At 29, I imagine many people would advocate that drinking myself to stupidity is probably not wise, but as I didn’t even start drinking until a was 22 and never went on a real binge until I was 25, I give myself a little wiggle room. So far my drunken stupidity has always been pretty damn harmless. Worst I can think of was when I knocked over some beers at a table in a beer tent, and everyone pretty much forgave me.

I woke up Monday mildly hung over and after getting back into the meeker to drive back to Bagkhangai I tried the final step to getting a DVT by sitting in a car for hours on end. Alas I am just far too healthy that even that didn’t get me a DVT and I found myself back at site at long last. I fell asleep as I predicted and now with the day to spare I have been catching myself up blogwise and also just walking out and around my site.

Moogi contacted me today and told me the noobs arrive at the sites on Thursday. Good, thatll give me something and someone to look forward to as the days roll on. Back at site, and will probably stay for a few weeks. Bank up a lil money and get ready for my first camping trip. This summer started with a bang and already is looking further up. Yehaw.

Hell of a weekend huh?

June 9, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

“Be careful of your use of the word “impossible” strictly speaking pretty much everything that has been claimed as being impossible has eventually happened”

So I didn’t bring this up in the previous blog though it happened over the weekend, but now that the person has left the country I feel the urge just to pass the sobering news on. There was a fellow volunteer that I trained with last summer who as of now no longer is serving the Peace Corps.

He had mentioned this a week ago but I didn’t really believe it until I saw him with the seperation paperwork the day before the Marathon. As we roll into a year of service a number of M20’s have begun to explore new ventures and some we who are “vacationing” back in America over the summer I am taking bets with others as to how many M20’s will be left standing at the end of the summer, but this particular person rattled me.

Not his reasoning or anything, his reasons behind leaving were his own and were sound but what made it all the more home hitting was how I thought of this guy. I would like to pretend that I am Peace Corps White Knight or something. That I am the beacon of hope in a world of despair. That I am the working radiator in an endless Zudd…but if my blogging and even a light dose of reality settle in I cant pretend that any of that is true. I consider myself a completely mediocre Peace Corps Volunteer trying to help but not exactly sweating blood sweat and tears out here. Not the best, certainly not the worst either.

The reason I was so shook was that this guy was a better PCV than me. By far. I know that and I mean it. He cared and dedicated himself in ways that I haven’t even imagined. He faced hardships where he lived that all my graphic detail about living conditions make me look like the Hilton. More still in all that time he never once blogged about it or even really complained when we would all meet up. If the M20’s had a White Knight I would have said it is him…and he is leaving after a year.

That can really sober a person, especially if you’re the sentimental type like myself. Still, the way he described it I think he is doing this of his own choosing and that is a good thing, so I wish him the best and good journey wherever life leads him.

On to today. Nothing really to do at it, but I went to school anyway. I tried to get the computer lab to work with the printers along with fellow Mongolians for a good two hours before we all threw up our hands in disgust and went to lunch. A driver error that ten seconds of fast American internet would have cured was us spending the morning trying all the different drive files we have saved as we don’t have internet. That was no fun, but as we all failed together it was a bonding moment. Something I have learned how to latch onto and to enjoy the feel of after so many similar experiences.

On the subject of internet I have made a Summer decision. I will not get internet until the end of the summer at least. From what I gather GMobile or some company is trying to extend their coverage to my site more thoroughly and when I have their assurance that it is covered ill take my chance and buy the card then. Meanwhile I have lived for a little under a year without the constant bombardment of internet so I am sure I can keep it up for a second if need be. I dunno, its mildly liberating everytime I get back to my soum to realize that theres so much intenet information I can no longer access. All the stuff that I would read or do that would just drive up my neurosis is all gone. I think I do well like this, but end of summer I might change my tune.

The Bagkhangai/Ondortolge trainers come to town tomorrow. I cant believe how many gringos were gonna have around here by tomorrow. I figure ill take pictures of their welcoming bowls of sotatsae and then ill give them the day to just relax some. I remember how overwhelming the first day here can be. Ill meet the Ondortolge people I suppose but then that means that when I move ill have to find where the other six volunteers in Bagkhangai are. Shouldn’t be too hard. Fun fun…

June 10, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “We don’t want to be one of “those” couples” –Bill Compton

Its nice to have ugly days of weather without the cold. Better still its ugly outside because its raining. Trust me, we needed the rain. It hasent really been good and wet around here in forever. The ground needed it especially. It does however mean that were not going to get to move around much these past few days. Luckily if memory served from the ten day forecast I looked up when I had internet the rain should soon subside. That and the new American neighbors will mean the kids will be out in full force. Ill bring my foxtail, the kids love that thing.

It was fun this afternoon to walk around town and to talk to people. Its kind of funny. There are some people in my community who still don’t talk to me. If this were an Aimag center that would be more forgivable but were in a town of 2000 or so people and we live in buildings that put us less than a hundred yards from one another. I can speak this language. Maybe I cant talk to you about politics but dammit at this point I can have those boring superficial conversations that we all have in 90% of our day to day lives. Still, some people refuse to understand me. Its not even for lack of hearing, they flat out refuse to hear me say anything in Mongolian. You cant make people listen to you, but I think it was important for the community to realize just how used they are to having an American in their town who can speak to them in their language. For later that afternoon twelve more bodies are going to show up and live here for over two months in which they know how to say NOTHING.

I am sorry, that’s totally schadenfreud I realize it but after a year of banging my head on a table trying to learn a hard language and not being able to communicate as well as I would like I am FINALLY not going to be the worst Mongolian speaker in town. The noobs loaded up and shipped out to reach the two towns at 3pm.

They showed up and though I wasn’t sure what to expect it all felt FAR too familiar. Clean and happy campers showing up looking around like every single crummy apartment complex was the 8th wonder of the world. I talked to them briefly but I knew that there on stimulation overload so after Moogi gave the host families some brief “don’t shove food down your new kids throats” types of advice I let them be. Ill invite them over sometime this weekend for an icebreaker. Ill be curious to see how all of them are doing.

Ger update: I leave for Bagkhangai on the 20th. That’s next Sunday. Sure, why not. That works. Moogi seems to think I get to keep my fridge. Dang…my ger’s gonna be pimping!

June 11, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Im gonna have a good year aren’t i?” –JD

June 11, 2009-June 11, 2010. And that’s a year. Wow. Sorta sneaks up on you. I mean I sorta knew in the back of my head that the summer would mean I had been here for a year. But that’s the kind of thing that you just sorta need to experience. I have spent a year in Peace Corps now and a year abroad on the other side of the world from where I grew up.

Any life lessons to take from it? Any great moment of life clarity in all of this? Not especially. Oh sure I brought up a few points over the year about how the longer I live and the more I encounter that I haven’t before I gain a wider spectrum of relativity, but I cant say I have had an enlightening moment. Some people are philosophers. Some people could do the things I do and come to some conclusion that they could relay to another in some great quote about life and how we live it. I resign myself and I have no such delusion. I am a clown.

Not with the makeup and the props, but in the way I simply react in contrary to how many others would. The way I lead my life is a constant attempt to find the things in life that scare or frighten or bother us and to find humor or amusement in them. People watch me, from pushing snow stuck vans to singing made up songs of “12 Days of Mongolian Christmas” and find amusement from it. It helps them to be the people they are as well. Its where I fit in in this world I suppose. Some are fighters, some are parents, some are teachers, some are students, some are philosophers, some are workers and the salt of the earth. I am the clown. The one who lives and speaks in a way that makes others less afraid of themselves.

Some days I hate that, but trying to be something your not or even acting in contrary to the way your inclined is superficial. You can call a cat a duck its whole life, call the cat Donald, let it play with fellow ducks and even teach it to quack instead of meow, but throw it in the water and it doesn’t swim. We like to think were all special, and we are when you think about it but we don’t change, we just get older and a few just get a little wiser as well.

Now the good thing is that even those of us who identify with less glamorous roles still do amazing things if we bother to notice. In this year I have learned much, both about myself and about the way of life that while so disconnected from the way of life I was used to I still find we have so few unsuperficial differences. I find amusement in many things I come across and I think that I help people in my own unique way as we all do.

Additionally, I get to live in this country for another year. Now settled and with more of the language and customs already known, I feel I connect a lot more with those around me. Many things to do, or not as I choose. Six months into a year that I pledged to myself I would not be looking into the next step. So far I have done well in that task, ill keep it up.

SO….thats clown philosophy for ya. Speaking less deep I found my time here to be an amazing thing. I have new PCV’s for company and a beautiful day outside. I think ill go hiking, maybe walk past a few animal skulls and reminisce on how that used to be something that would scare me.

A year of my life in Peace Corps, a year of my life in Mongolia. Lifes a funny thing you know?

June 12, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

“A mob is no less a mob simply because they are on your side.” –John Adams

Yesterday was fun! I hung out after the M21’s finished their Mongolian lessons and afterwards I got to eat lunch with a fellow volunteer and his family. He lives WAY out of town, in pretty much the most remote ger of the ger district. I knew the parents as they work at the school. They live that far out because like my host family they are herders. Not too many sheep or goats, but they got a metric ton of cows. Lucky for him that means a lot of beef, way less fat!

Eating lunch was great just because I got to be a mild translator for some of the conversation. Never saw that coming! Neither of his parents know any real English, which is ideal for learning and I explained this in Mongolian and they went into a mild rant about how unlucky those with mild English knowledge will make the language learning process more difficult. Actually it just draws out a little bit of the Mongolian language learning, but so far the 21’s seem a LOT better at just going with the flow, good for them!

His ger though….dear gods. HE HAS A KING SIZED BED!!! Not a wood slab, BED!!! That dude is gonna live like a king in that. The rest of the day we sorta hung out on a hilltop and just chatted. There was a rather amusing moment where one of the volunteers asked “so…what happens now?” Yup, its time to learn about boredom! It takes a minute to catch up and realize that we are indeed off the grid and learning how to entertain oneself can be boring. Now luckily come the start of next week the M21s will have language lessons all morning and then cultural lessons and practice teachings in the afternoon that will eat up a lot of time Monday through Friday, so they will be fine. As for that particular day we spent an hour or so throwing rocks. Strange how I never thought to do that before now. I also threw aroung the foxtail. (hehe…hes gonna sleep like a king in the king sized bed…im just realizing that I made a joke by accident)

All the volunteers said how in their homes all they can do is stare awkwardly at their host families. Ah memories, and while I have full confidence that they will all bond with their families over time I do recall that it is a rather awkward beginning. I gave them the advice to sit with their dictionary during the long awkward sittings so at least they have an excuse to focus on something other than just the staring. Hehe…ah memories.

I told them I would walk them out to the Air Force Base on Sunday, I figured its best to give em a day to sorta get really settled in and adventurous on their ownselves. I also am going to break out the spaghetti sauce my mom sent in a package a while back and I will make some spaghetti for the 21’s and myself.

One of the volunteers is 22. Good gods I remember what I was like when I was 22. I wouldn’t have lasted five minutes out here at that age.

Meanwhile today we had a summer storm. Seriously tough one too. We were walking between the center of town and the ger district when the temperature dropped ten degrees and the weather was seriously boding. We got into a house just as the downpour began and all the ger owners realized they hadn’t closed the flap at the top of their gers. Many had left belongings on the floor, and I hope there all alright for everyone.

Even I living in an apartment have a less than leakproof window in which my entire kitchen was flooded by the time I got back to my apartment. Bleh. Well…theres your tradeoff. The rain is finally back its just a little more than you might expect.

June 13, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Don’t worry, that could happen to anybody” –One of the cited quotes in the Mongolian/English book Peace Corps gives out.

My room was BUSY today that’s for sure. Armed with a single large can of sauce and four packs of spaghetti, I created the only meal I am capable of. Spaghetti w/sauce. I had eleven bodies to feed, who absolutely crammed into my apartment after we had gone on an uninterrupted tour of the Air Force Base (no Russian jerk anymore) Apparently I said the “ask your family to give you a bowl” order to myself as noone had, and I only had one bowl. What can I say, bachelor lifestyle I suppose.

So I knocked on the door of my neighbor and asked if I could use ten bowls and forks for the evening and they responded without even raising an eyebrow. How comical. So the feast was prepared and somehow I made exactly enough despite having never cooked for more than two people in my life at one time. For a guy named Josh somehow having exactly the right amount of food is very Jesusy.

The sauce…oh good gods that tasted good. The spices and flavors were so unknown and so unexpected. I had truly forgotten what this stuff tastes like. This is not even the good stuff either. Its your ordinary out of the can nonsense. Wow. Though terrified the food would not be any good it turns out everyone loved it. It was a smaller than average bowl, but the M21s are all being stuffed by their families with food so that matters little and they all loved the flavors as I did. Its nice when things work out well.

Afterwards I walked them out to their ger district and made sure none of the parents were frantic that I had kept them out and fed them, and from their I just made my way back to my place to clean up a little. I know I have seen a lot of the 21’s very soon into their training but as of tomorrow they have the same schedule I had last summer of being at school by 8ish and aside from a lunch break not being done with training until after 5pm. Then in a weeks time from today I also move towns, and so my interaction with this group will shorten as well. Tomorrow I will probably head to the black market in UB to procure a tent and camping supplies for my upcoming trips to the countryside. Better to do that now while I am in the town that the meeker leaves from instead of once I move and need to spend a few weeks learning the ger life. Probably just a day trip, in the market and right back out is all.

June 14, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Tired…so very tired” –Robert Lee

Ill do the UB thing Wednesday. Pick up packages, get more spices, buy the tent and be back on Friday. Personally if there were not errands to run in the city I would stay in town but ill survive. After that ill leave the last weekend of the month to go out East to Dadal and Hoh Lake where Chingiss did his thing.

It appears that I am a topic of discussion among host families to their new children. The general concensus about me is that I am crazy. What specificially I do that’s crazy that they choose to latch onto is that I run outside when it is cold. I like that. I was worried they would say I was antisocial as I live alone or that I don’t spend every waking minute at my neighbors places but instead im just a tall white guy who doesn’t get cold often and runs a lot. Hells yea!

Today my neighbor and former boss was being helped home after a bender. He has been drinking a little more than he should of late. Granted I drink a lot too but I have a few less years under my belt than he and so I bounce right back. Something to keep an eye on I suppose.

June 15, 2010. Ondortogle, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “You have business cards? You’re a stormtrooper!!!” –Stewie

Caitlin called me up today to reflect on the year of Peace Corps service we have both been through. Cailtin is spending part of the summer out in Olgii working for some type of day camp. I get it, it’s a change of scenery and some actual work which can be a big thing for us volunteers. Were the working sort after all.

Also set up today a hangout with Tripp. Its so surreal to think in a month hes out of here. Granted we only hang out once every other week or so but he has been a great buddy to have in a small town like this one. Hes the one that showed me where most of the things in UB were and was always willing to bring a package or two to my site when I didn’t feel like going to the city. Granted it looks like he is gonna remain in the country and all that but still. How surreal. If an M21 gets placed here I hope to be as good at helping them as Tripp has been in helping me. Oh yea, it also means I wont have anyone to play Settlers with either. Bleh….but I get his oven…Yeay!

Though I don’t get to see the games live, the world cup is occasionally shown on my Russian ESPN channel. I liked the game of US vs England. Common dude, I could have prevented that goal!!! Go America, were not completely getting our asses kicked. I remember where I was last World Cup. A beer festival in Erlangen, Germany. I was even in Munich during the Germany vs Costa Rica game. Damn that was fun. Mongolia is not so much into soccer as they are the sports they rock at like Wrestling and Horse Racing. Ah well, theres always 2014…wheres that happen?

June 16, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “And they said unto the Lord….how the hell did you do that???” –Rowan Atkinson

Water always tastes better after a run. Something to do with the whole “the further you move away from a center the bigger the backlash. When I go back to the states in a year and get a glass of Foxtail or some other four dollar bottle of wine it will taste like liquid ambrosia, and as time goes on and I get to more commonly drink the stuff that long awaited euphoria will dissipate. Originially I tried to see how I could use this new understanding to change my life. Eventually I found that it didn’t have to change my life, only how I decided to interpret my life and I found the knowledge far more useful then.

So yea, I went out for a run. I had put off running long distances since the marathon as both of my feet’s third toes are still black. I have full sensation in both of them and neither hurt, but that run had obviously done something to them. Just keeping an eye on them. The run felt amazing, and I was out there like I hadn’t missed a step.

I am officially pulling the plug on the ultramarathon up at Hovsgul Nuur. The reasoning being threefold. The first being that if I were to run up there I would need to bring all the gear necessary to run a marathon. The shoes, the clothes, the gels and so on, and if I intend to ride around the lake I need to pack down to the bare bones of things. Price also killed the race. The race is organized by camp Toilogt (everyone obviously calls it toilet, and the name is strange because that means nothing in Mongolian either) and they want fifty dollars a night to stay at the camp an I would need to stay both the day before the race to get medically checked out, id have to spend over 100 US dollars to enter the race and then I would need to stay the day after as well. Also as traveling alone the idea of the safety of all my stuff as I actually run the race and…yea theres just too many variables for me to do this the right way. Ive had expensive races before, but even that’s a little too rich for me. The third reason is that in September the Gobi Desert Marathon takes place, and two marathons in four months is more than enough (the Gobi Desert has a medal as well).

Instead it means that I will be heading up to Hovsgul Nuur to fish, horseback ride, meet the ancestors of the native Americans, and other once in a lifetime stuff. I know I need a guide once I get up there but with conversational Mongolian under my belt its my hope to get one of the cheaper guides who knows the area but doesn’t speak English as well. I am sure in July I will be able to find a handful of adventure minded travelers who can go in on the cost of renting the guide.

This means certain camping gear needs to be bought. A tent, water purifier, and maybe some type of cooking apparatus. I figure im well bought at 100,000 tugriks all things there included. In essence I am trying to spend no more than 2000 US dollars on my summer outings (including the Gobi Marathon) so that I can go on that Eagle Hunt in January out in Olgii. That will be expensive, but once in a lifetime truly. One by one a lot of M20’s have already begun to head out to their vacations either in Thailand or back to the States (a lot to the states!) but ah well.

Actually one additional expenditure of money has been on food. Not food in UB, but food in my community. Upon traveling to Bagkhangai to photo the M21’s arrival, I spent some time looking through the shops and found that this town has full on cans of beans in the store. Red kidney beans, black beans, peas, and even corn. Now while they are relatively as cheap as in America (little under a dollar a can) that would be out of my price range to live off the stuff, so instead I find myself taking a draw or two out of my American bank accounts to eat a little additional fiber this summer. I weighed options about if I wanted to use my American money to give myself some more luxurious living arrangements, and yes I have some reserves, but given that I am already drawing on my money to send myself on trips throughout the summer its not like I am already drawing external revenue sources, and this one would full on be healthy for me. So yea…ill eat some cans of beans.

Ive decided to remain at my site until my move on Sunday. Ill grab the camping gear after ive settled into my tent. Boring…but then again it beautiful outside so its not all that bad. And now im eating beans!

June 17, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quoute: “It is your god that despises wealth and the pursuit of it, not mine!” –A Pagan Roman General arguing with a Christian Magistrate over taxing rights.

Last night there was a disturbance going on outside my apartment. From my balcony I saw the man I had seen a few months back. The one who struck his wife and had chased after his daughter in a drunken stupor. He was obviously on a bender again, but this time he had gotten a little too hectic for people to ignore. It was strange to see but basically from what I can gather he had been ejected from his apartment by his wife for being drunk and he was not entirely too happy about that (though as I explained that unlike in other places ive lived women really do have complete and ultimate say about who is or isn’t allowed in the home) so basically he started shouting swear words outside up at the balcony where his apartment was. His friends came over and started to try and calm him down, but he was far too gone to be reasonable.

The man took a swing and that was all it took. He got flattened (all this time and despite all the fighting I have never seen a Mongolian flat out throw a punch) by his friend who had his knee on his back and his other friends held his flailing arms. After the drunken guy flailed for a second he basically passed out the guys scooped him up and carted him away to what I imagine is one of their places to sleep it off. I don’t have a lesson here, its just me observing how this family based culture handles these things.

Beautiful day outside. Not even a whole lot of wind even. I love it. This summers amazing. Boring at times without a whole lot of work but all around amazing. Will the landscape of this country ever fail to amaze me? Seriously every single time I look off into the countryside I feel like im in some far off world or staring at a computer simulation of something that could never exist. Then I remember that for a year of my life I have indeed been in a far off world.

I wonder how that felt to travelers in earlier times. Not Marco Polo, but ordinary individuals who through one set of circumstances or another found themselves living far far away from what they probably considered home. War probably was the most common cause of this, and they would be taken to city centers and not small towns like I have ended up in. What extraordinary lives we all end up living when we bother to notice.

You ever do that thing where you pick a different time in history and while keeping yourself financially at the same amount of money you think of how different your life would have ended up? Today I walked to the top of a hill and played around with that. What can I say? I do alone well and I do boredom pretty well too.

HUGE news: After writing that I went back outside and bumped into the M21’s heading off to Bagkhangai. They told me why and I decided to tail along. They were chasing after a unicorn. Something I new doesn’t exist and could only exist in some fairy tale world. So we walked along, they all seemed happy and to be doing great. We got to the other town and at the school they all pulled out their laptops…

…and the wireless bars all went to full….

Clocks all stopped, inspect my butt for flying monkeys, the Red Socks won the World Series again, up became down, disco came back, there is INTERNET in Bagkhangai!!! It gets even more insane. You see, Bagkhangai the town exists along the main road/railway that literally cuts the country vertically in half. Meaning that even though it is only a town of a few thousand that it is not getting its internet wirelessly, but through an actual line, giving it speed relative to what you would have back in America. Seriously ten computers were running IM messaging and Skype and all of them ran at top speed. I felt the urge to cry seeing that, I really did.

Literally I could feel the Earth stop moving and stand dead in its place. Not only does the Bagkhangai school has internet, it has full on Skype capable Wifi. They also have a huge pack of the One Laptop Per Child computers. Kids who don’t have textbooks are suddenly going to have the whole world in their hands….THAT so to speak, is a huge game changer. With wireless fast internet at the school I will no longer need to worry about an internet card and the classroom lessons I can do with the power of the internet are truly limitless. Google Earth, videos about Native American dances (the future generations of ancient Mongolians) as well as American school interactions. This second year of school is gonna be amazing, and with a town that has beans for sale I truly think I may have hit nirvana.

I lose plumbing…and I gain internet. Fair trade. I believe in unicorns now...

Three days till the move…

June 18, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I should warn you guys. Im a screamer…” –David Crocket’s final words to the Mexicans about to execute him.

In a years time I have grown to appreciate a great number of things. Beans, communication, diverse foods, wine (which I already had a great amount of respect for) but the sun is probably the one constant I can pull from Mongolia. The sun is why I survived the winter the way I did, and on boring and lazy June days like today I sit out on my balcony in my crappy hammock and with the light breeze and the bright shining light of that globe you feel like your literally bathing in the light. I will in my own way probably worship the sun for the rest of my life now. I always was prone to being connected to the weather but it took Mongolia for me to realize to what extent. I am doing a lot of retrospective thinking of late.

As I thought more about how in a few days I will find myself no longer off the grid, I realized that this past year has taught me a lot about myself and my relation to the internet. The internet is what it is. It takes the continuous and neverending flow of information throughout the world and provides an outlet for it to anyone who can receive it. In essence it brings the world to anyone, anywhere.

For a year I did without. I showed up to UB once a month or went to Tripps place and simply checked my email to make sure my family was okay and to order the next Star Wars book. In essence even this amount of internet I could do without, but there was also pizza to eat as well of course. When I was without internet I could feel the world get bigger and bigger, and I found that so much of what was going on in the world no longer affected me. The constant battle for health care reform was something I knew nothing about. I didn’t know that a tanker blew in the gulf, I was unaware of so much…and it didn’t bother me at all.

Could I do this for another year? With ease…in fact I begin to see how I could truly do without the constant flow of information for the rest of my life if it came to that. Yet I found the resources of the internet to be something that I could put to use even in my tiny little Mongolian town. I could provide more vivid English lessons to my students, and I could use the communications part to raise the funds to purchase dictionaries for my students (missionaries give bibles…I give dictionaries…theres something about that that seems so utterly important that I cant properly articulate) in essence I found out why I still not utilize the internet like I did in America. Where all I did was use the internet in excess to bombard myself with unnecessary information that eventually lead to neurosis and worry over matters that should not. In essence when the world gets smaller, everything in the world can effect you. When the world becomes massive, things that affect you fade away.

Also, when I saw that there was hi-speed wireless in Bagkhangai but I didn’t bring my laptop, I thought to myself “ah well…ill be able to use it in seven or so days, no big deal.” A year off the grid has taught me some patience, and the requirement of waiting and needing something became something I learned.

Try this someone. Turn off your computer, dont use your cell phone unless you have a physical emergency, and don’t use any of the communications tools for three days. I am curious how you would do. Ive done it for a year…youll go through withdrawal at first but when you finally get that feeling that you no longer need worry about everything that is happening in the world the world becomes a far more enjoyable place.

June 19, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “You gotta accept the good, because believe me there gonna make you accept the bad.” –Quentin Tarintino

Dammit, last night I did that annoying thing I do when im surrounded by new people I don’t know. I try too hard to make what I have to say interesting and it just comes off like some rant. Okay lets back up. So Tripp invited all the 21’s over to his place to hang out and what not and while I was there that’s just what I did. I didn’t do anything all that bad but in retrospect but gods dammit I hate when I do that!

This is why I do alone so well, or live and interact in a country where I cant articulate myself very well…

For example today I spent most of my time either running, throwing out some final pieces of junk from my place and saying a few VERY brief goodbyes to neighbors who I will likely all see again just not in the immediate future. 90% of the day I was bored out of my mind, and I really didn’t seem to mind all that much. I do alone well…

Ah well, shaking it off. Another georgous day. This summer has been full of very slow and very boring beautiful days… and I couldn’t be happier. Oh sure some days go a little slower than others but to be honest when its as nice outside as it has been the past couple weeks it can go as slow as it would like. I also phoned into Peace Corps today to let them know that I was going to head to Dadal to do some camping in the next two weeks. Peace Corps told me happy camping…they so rock.

I move tomorrow but ill believe it when it happens. Not as in its surreal to finally be moving into that round tent that ive spent pretty much the origins of this blog bitching and moaning about but just the idea that im already 20 days behind moving schedule so ill be surprised if this deadline holds. I hate myself in someways for just how much I want to live in a ger. Some abstract observation it says about me that a lot of my embrace of the exotic or interesting in this world is superficial in structure or something or another. I know this is me thinking too much, but an ego as I stressed a long time ago is a terrible terrible thing. But as Sky Father and Earth Mother are witness this is something I want SO badly, and whether it happens tomorrow or some day down the line it really is coming about.

Its strange to look around and see just how little stuff I have. I held on to all the care package boxes my family members have sent me and even with all the books (both the ones sent and from the Peace Corps library and all the new kitchen gear I have aquired over this year I still barely fill all the boxes and my tumpin with stuff. Even with all the boxes filled I look inside and absolutely every single thing I see has no real permanence. The books will all be donated to Peace Corps at the end of service, ill give my kitchen gear to my haasha family. Though I will bring back some of my sturdier clothes its also pretty obvious that some of my shirts and boxers have seen the end of their days. May be for the best, turning 30 and I probably shouldn’t still be wearing Nintendo pajama pants.

The only real souvenirs I have at this point that aren’t clothes are a Beer Stein from the bar “Greater Mongolia” and the bib from my UB marathon run. I have a winter dell and the shirt my mother made as well but aside from some war bows that ill buy in UB im pretty sure once I give everything I plan to give away ill be looking at no more stuff than what I left with.

I like that for some reason.

Not a lot of stuff…which is good because im going from a one bedroom apartment to a one round room ger with wireless internet at a nearby school. Who has a cooler life than me?

June 20, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “The brave, are the first to die.” –Magneto

HAH! Told ya I would believe it when I saw it happen. Apparently they are not satisfied with the Peace Corps power discussion and so my move to a ger has been delayed yet again. As usual I am employing the laughter defense mechanism to avoid being upset by this delay yet again. In all fairness I guess it really does not matter when I move to the ger, and im all packed up. I let Moogi know about my camping trip and she said just to go and not worry about when exactly it would happen. Fair enough.

I could go to UB today, but if I do then I would need to go on Monday to get the tent but I then would need to spend an extra day in UB because meekers don’t leave from Naarantul on Tuesday, and bored though I may be I would really like to limit my UB exposure. Monday is out because that means id need to wait until Wednesday to go into the market and then leave on Thursday, so now I wait until Tuesday so I can come back to my soum on Thursday. Yea that will work.

Might as well go walk over a few hills while im just lounging around.

Oh yea, its Fathers Day. Better call up the gallopin geyser. (hey, he still calls me bear at the age of 29!)

June 21, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Today’s Quote: “Are your legs wet? Are you seeing pyramids? Because your knee deep in DeNile.” -Bob

Well that’s just not fair. I was going to be the coolest son on the planet. A world away and yet on Fathers Day I was going to call up my dad who in no way was expecting this to happen and wish him a happy fathers day. He was not even going to be aware that the only reason I knew it was Fathers Day was the Fordham University calendar my mom had sent me in the mail had the specific date down on it too. I had my phone card, punched up the number and it tells me “you have 25…seconds” dammit!

That’s not right. Not the unfairness of it, that card had over 20 MINUTES left on it last time I used in back in April. Well, I can go back to the Bagkhangai school tomorrow and send my dad an email and when I go to UB on Tuesday I can buy another….but you know so much in life depends on timing. No fair! Actually this is not the first international card that’s short changed me either. The first one I ever used lost over thirty minutes when I called my mom the first time…but its not exactly like I can explain myself in enough detail to a customers support desk in UB either…Well, happy Fathers Day dad, and know that seriously I was going to call. I even tried to use the international calling feature that would have blown through 20000 tugriks worth of time on a phone in a minute but the phone would not even have let me do that! Blasted…

On to a chipper note. While I haven’t moved towns yet I have by lucky chance got to meet my soon to be new haasha family in Bagkhangai. Shes one of the teachers and seems a very happy and nice lady. Its so different being able to communicate from the very beginning with someone I will be living with. Im already invited in for dinner whenever I want. I had to fight the urge to leap over the table and kiss her at that point and then I called myself into check and reminded myself that I will NOT in fact be fed like the M21’s are every single meal, but it did instantly support a theory of mine that apartment buildings like the one I am currently in makes it a lot harder to have the more open type of Mongolian closeness that is prevailant in Ger/housing living in this country. I got a five year old younger brother like I did at my Erdene home. Thatll be fun. Emotionally im a kid and I have about as much Mongolian as he does so I get the feeling were gonna hit it right off. He wears this pimp ass NY Yankees hat. I tried to explain to them that they are an American Baseball team that I used to live near when I lived in the Bronx. Probably the funniest part was that the only thing I didn’t know how to say was “baseball” in Mongolian. Its pretty much the only sport we don’t play around here. Ill look that up.

So heres something. Its boring around here. No school, noone wants an English club, and the PC people are all busy with their language lessons. Now ive mentioned boredom quite a bit in the past few entries but in all this time I haven’t really complained about it. I like the peace and serenity that Mongolia has in the summer. Sitting on the hammock with an overpriced beer doesn’t hurt either but still…the calm and quiet is nice.

So what do I do with my time? Well I occasionally go hiking as I mentioned. When I go tomorrow to go buy a tent in UB ill even be able to begin practice for camping and whatnot. I also play with the kids in the town square and go running and all that. Additionally I read books, and here is what im getting to. I have a lot of sci-fi books because…well that’s my thing. Dresden Files, Fate of the Jedi, that sort of thing and such, but if you read too much of the same thing for too long you can go a little batty. Its like just before I came to Mongolia I spent pretty much a day watching on youtube an entire Spanish version of ER called Hospital Central, and it winded me into a nervous and neurotic ball. Probably should have looked up a few other random shows to level it out.

So as with reading I have diversified. I actually have been making significant progress in a book I hadn’t really gotten around to reading before. Not too many have, even those who I think are a bigger fan of this genre. Now granted it’s a long book and a little dry, kinda like the Similarion if you’re a Tolkein fan, but once you get the pages turning its not all that bad. Its strange that this book is not read more thoroughly given its popularity as well. I think the reason most people don’t read the whole thing is that usually someone else is reading it to them and they only take a small chunk and read it out of context. In truth the whole book is pretty chronological and is more abstract history than anything else. I rescued this book from an outhouse between UB and Bagkhangai and with time to spare and a newfound enjoyment of diversified reading I have started to get through it.

Im reading the bible…(anyone who didn’t know what I was reading based on those clues is a total lunkhead.)

Yea, go figure. The bible. Now in all fairness I had a headstart. In college I took a higher level college course of “Judaism between Old and New Testament” and as such I pretty much had scholastically read the first

What the Arvaikheer crew does for recreation. Caitlin you got the true gift. I still laugh everytime i watch this.

That right there is an army of M21's in Ondortolge, Mongolia who were fed spaghetti with pasta sauce my mom shipped to me a couple months ago. They all seemed to think it was an explosion of flavor. They have only been here a few weeks, they cant be tired of Mongolian food yet!

If you look close at the kids hair, you may notice hes got a swastika shaved into it. It is a tibetan emblem and you notice that unlike its Nazi cousin this swastika goes counterclockwise instead of clockwise. Still, when your raised in the west you have such a different take on this, especially when someone shaves it into their hair

Introducing Josh Jacobs... FIVE TIME MARATHON MAN!!!!

Me coming to the end of the race. Thank goodness it was raining because i was REALLY out of liquid at the end of that race even with all the rain.

Peace Corps Representing!!! I like Chinngis in the background. Seems appropriate.

Behold what my water filter gets out of the water i pour from my sink. Doesnt that make you thirsty???

May 3, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “G.M. Chrysler I cant afford that!” –Seymore Skinner

Well THAT was an anticlimactic weekend. I was planning on heading into UB after being away for a month. After nearly a year without the steady stream of internet I was planning to buy the internet modem card that my site mate has with the money I have been saving up from my bank account. After that I was going to drop in to the UB guesthouse for a night of fast paced Internet (relatively) and beer drinking and general carousing. Anticlimactic.

They place was sold out of modems, and so I proceeded to the guesthouse where the internet was down. To top it all off I didn’t get the salad dressing mix because of a mixup of time schedules and because it was the first of the month there was no booze sold in any store or restaurant in Mongolia…. So yea….shoulda just stayed put another week.

Next week I am going to try again for the Internet card. No overnight either. Just out and back. Were still not even completely certain the Internet cards work on a Macintosh computer either. Maybe this difficulty is doing me a favor in that I should continue on without internet, but no…if I can get it I will. The question remains if it is possible. My lack of frustration at all those things not coming to fruition I think has to do with learning how not to base your happiness in life on success of failure….or im just getting used to life in which things truly don’t always work out. Either way it’s a growing moment.

I got back to my apartment yesterday to see that the wind had blown my window open. Luckily it hadn’t rained or anything, but I needed to do a lot of dusting to get my place back in one piece. Now I find myself without the power of Google Earth and I need to think up something else to do with the school kids this week. I sort of want to save a film for the following week so maybe ill get some grammar lesson.

There was one nice thing I got out of the weekend. Some Irish guy I had never met accidently left one of his shirts at the guesthouse. It had been a month so it was free to a good home. Usually I am pretty selective about my clothes. They got to look generally grungy, but have both a practicality and simplicity to them. This shirt fit the bill. Grey, blue stripes not parallel or consistent along the shirt and it has three large buttons at the neck that have a white sheet going underneath it. It gives the illusion that I am one of those people who actually would wear layers of clothing but in fact its just one so it works out nicely. I am still wearing it today.

School was long today but probably my greatest team teaching experience to date. Moogi and I are getting a squad of 11th and 9th grade girls (the boys don’t even bother) for a sort of English competition happening in Nalikh at the end of the week. They needed some serious help, and that’s what we did. Moogi and I worked really well together, and at the end of the tutoring (it went on from 1pm to 7) I showed her with the schools internet how to look up other grammar subjects. It was the first time I really felt as though I had provided my counterpart with something other than alternative labor sources. Like this was something she could use long after I was gone to help others. That’s what we want in Peace Corps, and it took a LONG time but I finally hit home with something. Wasent even that big a win, but it was a win…nice.

Downside is that I came home too exhausted to run. Ill pick it up tomorrow, after I get a few more meals and sleep in me. Speaking of which, im off to bed. Night all.

May 4, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Don’t bring an eel to a swordfish fight” –Sue Sezno

All this week I am at the school seriously working. Sunup to sundown training dedicated kids who are competing in an English competition to hone their English skills. They sit attentively and pay attention, and I suddenly after months and months of banging my head on a desk trying to get students to pay attention I suddenly find myself with my every wish. Throw in the weather and good gods it’s a bloody utopia around here!

It actually means I need to work now, but I am not complaining. Though I am prone to laziness I feel that the past nine months have proven to me what type of teacher I am. Some teach because they are good motivators, some teach because they like to be the law. I see that I am not that kind of teacher. I was a pain in the ass when I was a student, and I see now that outcasts and class clowns do NOT make good teachers when they get older no matter what Dead Poets Society would have you believe. No I am a good teacher to those who like to learn. Its more a partnership in learning something than it is me teaching. That makes the argument I that if I decide to become a teacher for life to work in some kind of community college. There I wouldn’t have to wear ties either….

I got invited to a teacher hang out at Mother Rock this weekend. It’s that place that I saw last summer and I am glad for the invite. I think the teachers are all looking forward to kicking back after the school year (technically we still have this month, but aside from the English teachers getting the kids ready for their English competition and the University entrance exams) every single teacher and student mentally is checked out to the point that I am pretty sure that they are just coming to school out of instinct. The hangout will be nice I think…and if anything it will get me outside a little bit more. As I switch schools some of the teachers I am not going to see all too often, and it will make as a good way to say some informal goodbyes.

My counterpart Moogi has decided that she’s too fat. As a result she has decided not to exercise, but instead to simply stop eating certain days of the week. Its now becoming a game of figuring out if Moogi is eating today based on how cranky she gets at school. I kept my opinion of her diet to myself. She should just do like I do and run till your legs fall off. Way healthier, but then again shell probably outlast me when I keel over from a heart attack on a marathon. That is funny the way life works out.

When the sun is out I can run in my running shorts and the wife beater. Still a tad cold but a thirty-minute run can be done in such gear. Life is good.

May 5, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “Having a job you love is a lot like cocaine. You do it a lot and you often forget to eat.”

CINCO DE MAYO!!!!! Well its not like you need an excuse to drink in this country but once again I have found one. No one knows about the holiday obviously so this will be a gringos only party of my site mate and me. Maybe well go crazy and do a power hour, by far my favorite of the drinking games ever devised.

Btw, about the quote. I don’t know why, but this week despite almost no difference except for longer hours has been the greatest week of teaching so far in my little under year of time in Mongolia. Everything seems to be clicking, and the ones we are teaching are demonstrating to me that yes there is an acre of students who will never again use English in their lives and so they see no reason to learn, but there are others in that acre. Ambitious one’s with a desire to learn, to grow, and to find out more about the big bright world out there. That’s what I’ve found this week, and I am glad it finally showed itself to me.

That and the warmer weather of course. I try to imagine myself back in early August when I was walking around in shorts and a t-shirt loving the sheer dry heat that would be complimented by the light breeze. Were not there yet, but were getting the hang of it I think. The kids playing soccer outside are back in shorts… there game is as fast and cutthroat as it had been seven months ago before the epic winter kicked in… you know, Einstein really had something going with the whole time is relative thing.

I got some interesting news from my mom at home. My mom has an old friend that she is almost always hanging around with. They are your perfect odd couple. One is conservative and one liberal. One religious, one not, there’s other differences but seriously the two couldn’t be more different except they are both middle class, happy middle aged ladies who despite all the differences keep each other level, stable and happy. Perhaps one of my fondest memories of our two family moms was when we would go to church on Christmas Eve. One eve for some reason my body decided I needed to faint right during the whole “Peace” thing and I was dragged out of the church into the lobby and woke up staring at two doctors and a nurse (I will say, if your going to faint…do it in a Catholic church!)

So anyway, I asked my mom about how her friend was doing and for the first time I didn’t get a just “fine” response. It turns out that her friend is getting really involved with the whole “tea party” protesters and is really a part of the political process these days. My mom naturally finds this to be something she wants no part of and actively opposes and therefore their differences which they usually choose to simply ignore in favor of friendship are not quite as easy to overlook as before.

Now that friend of my mothers has really been one of the better things that’s happened to my mother in forever and as such any such circumstance that might damage their friendship might worry me, but then I thought it over and realized this is just a phase. The liberals are in charge, and for the past eight or so years the liberals were the ones who were sticking it to “the man” Heck even during the Clinton years in essence it was a conservative senate and house against this quirky guy from Arkansas who won because of Perot….

But now the liberals ARE the man… so now the great process is reversed with the liberals sitting high and mighty while the conservatives get to form the rallies and talk about how those in charge are screwing everything up. I say let them. I mean common my fellow liberals…do you remember what a stink we made back in 2000 and 2004 for that matter? It’s just their turn. So yea, not worrying all that much, true friendships transcend politics.

Taking myself out of the political theatre of America for a year has given me much to reflect on. I think I found out how important politics is. Politics is as important as you choose for it to be. Literally it is what you make of it. Out here, away from constant internet sources and newspapers and television telling me a thousand different ways to think I find a great deal of satisfaction in NOT knowing every last thing that is going on. On the other hand, this is in essence an exile and that if everyone followed in my example and withdrew from politics we would find ourselves at the mercy of the few willing to pursue politics.

I think having a lot of people with influence and vie for power to be a healthy thing. Keeps anyone from being too strong for too long. The founding fathers would probably been disappointed with a lot of the decisions we have made in our times (heck we elected a black guy for crying out loud!) but I think they’d pat themselves on the back when they realized their power structure still allows a man like G. W. to be president for eight years and then a black guy for (hopefully) the following eight.

Enough thinking….cinco de mayo…time to start drinking!

May 6, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “So what do you do when the power goes out? Me personally I sit in the dark….and I wait…and that’s it” –Joe Rogan

Power went out last night. Water too. Stayed that way until later this afternoon. So obviously Cinco de Mayo fell through. I spent my time reading my Mongolia tour book. And as can happen…I got an idea.

My biggest gripe about where I live is that im pretty much in the center of Mongolia. The Kazaks’ and those out east may disagree but Mongolia is pretty much a huge example of a city state. All roads lead to UB, and all commerce, business and power comes from this central point. So in September I will run a marathon down in the deep Gobi desert and the ultra marathon up at Hovsgul Lake will also give me time for some fishing and horseback riding. I had originally planned to trek out west at the start of the summer, but now I am realizing this leaves all of the east unexplored. Its where the old empire used to be stationed and is teeming with cool looking wildlife. More then that the east is a place that with my Mongolian and confidence I can pretty much do this by myself and don’t need to jump on board with another tour group. Not to say that if I spot any cute German girls I wont pull my horse up along side them…but you get the idea that I can take an off the beaten track trip (well….an even MORE off the beaten track. Mongolia is already pretty damn isolated even if you go by group.)

So now that’s gonna happen this summer instead of going out west. There is a final reason why I am putting off the west, and this is where the whole ambition/masochism/insanity kicks in. The west may be cool but the problem is its not a unique brand of cool. Horseback riding is all doable along Hovsgul Nuur, and the east has all the hills and creatures to look at. There had to be something the west had that the rest of the country didn’t….eagles….they have EAGLES! Better still these aren’t prop pieces, they full on hunt grown wolves with these things. So I looked up in my book about those who go on hunting expeditions with their eagles. The whole, horse trekking through the countryside till they spot a fox way off and they let the bird fly… They only do it in one very isolated spot near the border with Russia/Kazakstan/China and they only do it in the dead of winter….

…oh this so has to be done! I will save the West for a winter break trip. It will actually require me to get a guide and all that and will cost enough but this is truly legendary. With that I will have ventured to every amazing corner of this country and can pat myself on the back for an amazing trek. And to think…all the M20’s are going back to boring old America this summer!

As for today, nothing new. More teaching and tutoring. Looking forward to my trip with the teachers out to mother rock on Sunday and will give the whole internet thing a final try on Saturday when Tripp does a UB run.

May 7, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “One log is not a fire. One person is not a family” –Mongolian saying

Well I ate like a king last night. A Mexican king no less!!! Armed with fajita materials and assisted by Tripp we cooked up some food with spice. Now that’s what im talking bout. Was a great feast, though I will say I am spoiling myself a great deal these days. Something tells me the summer is gonna be a lot like that. Something about the warm weather and the free time will likely lead to me spending quite a bit (relatively!) Im okay with that at this point though. For the feast I invited over my spices loving counterpart Moogi. She can be a real pain, but when everything’s said and done I am glad I got to spend a year here working with her.

School is winding down more and more. Gym can actually happen outside now and pretty much everyone is finding a way out of class to go outside. I haven’t the skill to stop them, and to be honest if I were not in formal clothes id be joining them. Their behavior in class is truly appalling. I have absolutely no control over them anymore, not that I ever really had all that much.

The good news is that if I take up teaching as a profession back in America I can rest assure that ill never have such little control over a class ever again. I think that’s what destroys good teachers. Universal education is a wonderful thing, but the problem is that you spend enough time getting kids to do the whole “Sit Down Shut Up” thing that you lose your will or desire to teach once you get five minutes. Frank McCourts much less famous but far better book “Teacher Man” is a good read if you want to grasp why teachers burn out.

The upshot is that today I made a friend. It started this morning when my toilet had slowly been leaking water down into my neighbor’s bathroom. As this happened they came up to inspect it and call the jijur. We started yakking and next thing I know I am invited for dinner tonight. That rocks. I think he was a little taken aback at just how much Monoglian I know. We hadn’t really interacted since when I first arrived here and my initial knowledge of Mongolian made conversations impossible. Not so much now obviously. That’s cool…given how my other neighbors have become a little more reclusive these days it might do me some good to have a few more to interact with.

Another really cool thing however happened though. Tripp wraps up in a month, and he owns an oven (he got it from Lief) regardless where he ends up his abode will have an oven and so he is giving it to me. Great guy that Tripp! This means I can make baked potatoes!!! Outstanding. Even better, I can also try to get enough materials to make some makeshift pizza or something like it. (chili ketchup for sauce works and then its just a matter of finding and keeping quantities of cheese from Mercury market in UB. Pretty much half the recipes in the cookbook don’t work unless you have an oven. Now the possibilities are….okay not endless but now its going to be that the types of foods are not available and not the means are not available. Like so many other things in life we replace one difficulty with another…but at least I can premake bake potatoes so for the first time I can premake food that I can consume to eat later at will. Yehaw. Ill get nice and fat out here in Mongolia after all.

Tomorrow I try again for the Internet card. Somehow I doubt itll happen, but you never know. If I have it ill start to look up some stuff for my trip out east next month. If I plan to do this without a tour group I will probably need a little more info on places and things to look at so the internet will help with all of that. If not I can always just wait until June and then use the Internet in UB…. Ill live if the Internet thing doesn’t happen.

May 8, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Ill tell you why…its none of your damn business that’s why!” –Senor Chang

I have GOT to stop going to UB. Good news is that may actually now happen. I went alone to one of the two internet card providers in this country and found out that they don’t work on macs. The other says that connection to my town is iffy (they put up antenna for all the major cities in Mongolia which only amount to about thirty or so towns and my tiny town is 30 miles from the nearest big town, so its TECHNICALLY possible but I don’t want to buy this card and not have it work and I cant return it.

So next week (which I needed to go to UB anyway because I need to get in a meeker to the BBQ) I will go with Tripp and ask that if I buy the thing and it doesn’t work am I allowed to return it. They say yes, ill give it a try, they say no and im out of options. Ill live one way or another, but in anticipation of buying the thing I have taken out nearly a million tugriks from my bank account. Now I can put that money to my summer trips, but just having a million tugriks lying around can make one feel a little apprehensive.

I went to the state department store in search of salad dressing. Nothing. It’s the biggest damn supermarket in the country and they don’t have it. This means that I need to pay a visit to a very special market that ONLY has Western stuff to get it and that will run me up a fortune, but hey I got money now right!

I didn’t get any time on the internet in UB either because I couldn’t spend the night, as early tomorrow the teachers myself included all go hang out in the woods at a ger camp near something called “Mother Rock” In essence my UB experience was just all rush and absolutely nothing productive came from it.

…and then the screaming babies on the ride back. What the hell!?!?! Never having kids. Seriously I am going stateside and getting a vasectomy right after I take a shower. This screaming ball of snot and agony…how the hell do kids not go hoarse? I can’t make those sounds for more than five minutes. This kid was inches from my ear and the mom tried every trick in the book. Two and a half hours! Forget hoarse, how the hell did the kid stay hydrated?!?!?! Then they grow up and start punching each other in my classroom…good gods I am never having kids!

And now with gale force winds and the 40 degree Fahrenheit weather keeping me from enjoying the outside I sit in my room and really hope that Mongolia is burning out its cold and wind. This is getting to be a little too long to put up with without feeling some stress.

Final note: As if demonstrating that it always can get worse. It starts to snow again and the bbq hangout got canceled. Yea, now I really am just flat out angry. It’s the month of MAY!!!!!! Stop fracking snowing and warm up!

May 9, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “What is it with you and rape?!? No one’s raping anyone!” –Dexter

Two extremely anticlimactic weekends in a row. Should have stayed in UB. The extreme wind outside canceled the teacher trip to Mother Rock and so I find myself confined to my cold apartment room as my friends in the community all were much smarter and more informed and went and stayed in UB today.

Wind what the hell??? Its worse than it was a week and a half ago! It’s a bright sunny day and temperature wise we may even be at 50 degrees but relentless winds that simply never stop have been hammering my town for this entire weekend. No one is outside. Not one person. Even when we were in the middle of the snowstorms there had always been someone outside on some errand of some kind. Now we cant even go out to mother rock because of this stupid wind. The wind is actually strong enough that the temperature outside despite being 50 is actually below freezing, and when condensation falls it comes down as flakes. Snow in May and week long winds that make concrete groan. I know I wanted the rough stuff but COMMON!!!! It’s the merry fracking month of May! This is supposed to be that glorious month when you get to finally get some tan on your skin and you get to burn off your winter fats. I could use a little of both, and all in all I just need to get out of this bloody room, and I physically cant go outside today….ugh. I even have to wear my wool socks again….ITS MAY!!!!!

The only consolation is masochistic in nature. My counterpart told me she has NEVER had a year of weather like this in Mongolia. This is tough even by Mongolian standards, and while I may be bored out of my mind and a little physically uncomfortable from sleeping on floors in cold apartments with toilets that are leaking water down into my neighbors bathroom….yea im still in one piece. Go me…

On a slightly more chipper note, though the BBQ hangout got canceled I got another invite from those a little annoyed that the BBQ was canceled. Caitlin, a fellow M’20 who lives in the town of Arvairkheer (about 8 hours west of UB). She’s the one with the other blog that has a Tolkien quote for a title as well. “There and back again…” (while I admire the classics like that one and in all fairness its even more accurate as mine suggests I am wandering when in fact ive been confined to my room for the past six months I do stress that her quote is much more famous as it comes from a movie and mine is an offline Gandalf gave Frodo for advice since he was on his own…oh good gods I am such a geek and a girl sometimes!!!!) Anyways she invited me over to join the six or seven volunteers in some general hanging out. She also offered to make me Thai peanut chicken pasta, and instantly I was sold on the trip. Would also be nice to see her again, we haven’t crossed paths in about six months as she’s not a TEFL and therefore her schedule runs differently than mine.

So in essence instead of going a little to the east next Friday ill be going a little to the west. See people, but a slightly more calm version of it. That’ll be nice.

Oh yea…mothers day today (im not smart or sentimental, its on my Fordham University calendar) probably should call up mom.

May 10, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4 fast ones

Today’s Quote: “The bureaucracy is expanding to met the needs of the expanding bureaucracy”

I hate new bosses. I don’t hate my specific new boss actually, in fact personally I rather like the guy. But new bosses all do the exact same thing. They take some specific characteristic of your work that works perfectly find and modify it so their new rule of power is looked upon like a change.

This is my long way around of complaining that my bosses have decided to require individual lesson plans instead of unit plans of Moogi’s work and my own. (i.e. I need to type up lessons for the two of us) Putting aside that we are two weeks away from finishing school and putting aside that no one in this school uses year plans, let alone the unit plans and definitely not lesson plans… Now I have to sit in the teachers lounge as everyone makes a huge racket and the crackly television plays “We are the World” over and over again like the song “The Circle of Life” did back in 1996 when I was on a driving trip around Hawaii as a teen. In essence its all just stressing me on something that SO does not deserve my time or attention, and its becoming so unnecessary that you cant even tell yourself “you don’t have anything else to do” to fix that. Bureaucracy is one thing; this is just making stuff up.

Got to call mom last night. She sounded all right which cheered me up a little. After complaining a lot in my past few blogs it was nice to get her take on a lot of my problems. Her solutions are always FAR more dramatic than anything I had planned, and so it reinstalls a touch of sanity in me. For instance after complaining about how many of the modem cards don’t work on a Macintosh my mom suggests that she purchase a $400 PC laptop and ship that to me, a notion I instantly shot down of course but that degree of overreaction gave me a little bit of an ego boost… I am not doing that badly, I just need to break through this rough patch.

My mom, who no doubt has told every single person within shouting distance about Peace Corps and Mongolia additionally has been telling me about this movie called “Babies” Come to think of it, shes has been telling me about this since the dawn of my time in Peace Corps service. Its apparently about three babies raised in three different cultures. Mom’s always too excited that one of the babies they document is from Mongolia that she has never bothered to tell me what other two nationalities the other kids are. Personally while I think it will be cool that Mongolia gets some publicity I fear that they reason they would have chosen Mongolia is so that they can show a kid raised in some form of “rustic” life. While indeed those born in small distant soums and the countryside do get a frontier type of upbringing the thing is that the majority of Mongolia does indeed have excellent hospitals and kids that just have a few culture unique growing up ceremonies such as a hair cutting ceremony and are otherwise just another batch of kids (despite the fact that Mongolia’s population growth is less than a precent). Still, after listening to my mom talk about this for over six months I figured it would be wise to place it on the blog. Anyone who reads this who doesn’t know my mother (all two of you) likely have internet and can google whatever this documentary is.

The wind died down today. I needed that more than anything. I needed to run, sweat, feel exhausted physically and all around tire myself. Wow, why the heck am I so cranky of late? This is not like me and when I think about it I don’t really have a whole lot to complain about.

I mean common me! Its Monday, not even a stressful day. For the first time in the near 11 months of service I cant wait for Friday to get here. It must be the idea of hanging with my fellow volunteers for a couple of days that makes me cheer on the weekend. Twenty days till summer vacation…Twenty days….ill even get some new neighbors around that time too.

Postscript: Immediately after writing this I went out to run. Wow….I REALLY did need that.

May 11, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “We are wolves in a world of sheep” –Temujin’s brother told him that after they wiped out the Koreans.

And that’s 11 months living in Mongolia. That’s eleven months of Peace Corps service. And so here I sit in my quaint little apartment for the last month actually and I realize that in a month I will be removed from my indoor plumbing and kitchens and be living in a round room filled with flies and new labor chores ive never had to do like chopping wood and gathering water from wells, all the while continuing to make approximately four or so dollars a day with two Masters Degrees and two years of professional administrative skills…WHO HAS A COOLER LIFE THAN ME!?!!?

But seriously I feel much better today, rather strange given that Tuesdays are usually one of my long ones. The weather turn around has given me exactly what I needed, the ability to go outside and move around. The chance to run my body exhausted and to tan my face in the sun. Mongolian weather is good at this tease like way of giving you one day of misery followed by a week of good days and then the other way around the next time. Well the timing could not have been better.

Mongolia is the living example of the concept of opposites. Mongolia teaches comfort by inflicting pain in almost all ways. All comforts are a blessing and a curse as are all difficulties. I know the pain that is to be hungry, and so my food tastes all the better. I know what it is to sleep on the floor now, and so I understand that a flat mattress is comfortable. I know what it is to be in a Zudd, so now I find luxury in 40 degrees Fahrenheit. I know what it is to be bored, so I know the joy that I can get from a phone call back to loved ones. Its like what I said a while ago: we don’t change, but if your willing to realize it we continuously gain relativity. I thank Mongolia for that, I used to think that our PC service was supposed to be about learning new teaching stratagems and bring them back to the states, but now I found something much more useful that will exist well past my time as a teacher.

So as for what happened today. Once again I was used by my counterparts as a source of a computer that actually works along with a work force that can be delegated the tasks that would otherwise be theirs to do. Once again, my ability to not get annoyed at this demonstrates just how adjusted I am to my life here in Mongolia. Nothing for it, and I will say that while the concept of being a free labor force insulting you sorta need to remember that as unglamorous as all this is…I AM a free labor source. I demonstrate work ethic and willingness to contribute to my community.

However, I do begin to understand how in the second year of service many a volunteer begins to raise the bar higher in terms of expectations of counterparts contribution to work materials. A friend of mine with a team teaching problem would not team teach if they did not plan the lesson in advance (wow…if I did that id only work five hours a week!) and some used like me as secretaries decree that they will only type up tests that they have a say in the making of. In essence using our mad computers and typing skills as a bonus to them willing to work with us in some form of teaching capacity, and not like I find myself today pretty much doing the bidding of my two counterparts….two or so weeks until school wraps…ill grow a pair for next year. Trying to change the system now would only rock the boat and not fix anything.

Wow I really am quite okay with this aren’t i? Must have to do with running!

May 12. 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “There trying to kill me…I get that a lot.” –Harry Dresden

I am feeling REALLY good for the past couple days. It’s the weather. They just turned off the wind and 20 degrees became 55 with a bright sunny sky. I felt the wonderful irritation of my skin tanning today. Nothing too severe, its just remarkable to feel such a foreign discomfort once again. The daily runs giving me a boatload less stress as well. Best of all, when you run like that the desire to drink drops. Been sober for this week and I think it had more to do with boredom and being stuck inside but whatever the reason or reasons everything just feels SO much better now. Come to think of it I cant recall the last time I was sober for a week. Its not so bad. Little more energy, little less stressed, little more bored….all relative of course. Probably a good sign that I recognize the pros and cons.

Four or five months of good weather await me. Good gods who needs to go to America when you got weather like this? Granted theres no beach, but really that’s just getting really picky.

I probably need to ask my boss what day exactly she wants me to move over to Bagkhangai. School is over in two weeks but after that is when things for the school and my bosses will actually start to get a little busy. They gotta roll out the red carpet for the M21’s and all the paperwork and details that go on with that. I got that marathon on the 5th, meaning I gotta head into town a few days earlier to cram down some calories as well as get my bib and stuff at registration. I imagine the final couple days of May would be ideal. I could move, put my stuff down, give everything in my ger a once over to make sure nothings not working or anything like that and then I would head in town for the race and be back in town in time to take snapshots of the noobs chugging down their first bowl of soutatsae… its strange you would think after a year of being in one of the most unorganized and poorly scheduled countries on the planet that I would have picked up that bad habbit. No worries, im sure another year will beat me into it.

Some PCV’s hit the near midway mark and despair at the idea that there only halfway through. Though I have some crummy days I can tell how good of a thing it is that I get to spend a second year in Mongolia. If I left now…just as I got used to my floor…just as I got used to meat….just as I got used to showering once a month….just as I learned how to speak a language that will be next to absolutely useless after I leave this country….if I were to leave now I would indeed be seriously bummed. This second year is gonna rock, I can feel it. No heavy booze and daily runs….i love the summer!

May 13, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

“This is not art, it is cottage porn.” –Lyla

Only a couple classes on Thursdays . I got to use the internet for five minutes today and found out something pretty cool. Starcraft 2 is coming out this summer. That’s pretty amazing actually. Not the game, I am sure the game will be fun but its just this is the first time ever that Blizzard Entertainment actually made a computer game and is gonna release it without taking three or four years to finally roll it off the assembly line. My computer is a couple years old, but it’s a Macbook Pro and I imagine it will be able to play the game. Something that will help to pass some of the quieter winter nights in seven or so months.

I found out today that a gang of the traditional Mongolian dancers in my town are leaving for Japan next week. I imagine its one of those “we pay for the tickets, you get to perform” type of setups because they are going on “tour” so to speak tearing up dance floors with the traditional male trio dance where they start off as a flying eagle, then a man on horseback and finally the gusting winds. They perform this pretty much every time we have a ceremony and its quite good, but after 212 performances its sort of just becomes a dance. I do though think this is a great opportunity for the teenage boys of my town. Heck, I’ve never even been to Japan!

Lessons are sort of over as far as school goes. Doesn’t mean the kids are out of control, quite the opposite in fact. Actually for the past couple days the kids have been seated quietly in their desks with their heads down pouring over their books frantically studying. On the first day I just sat there, afraid to move that whatever I would do would somehow undo this utopia. Then I realized why the kids were behaving as such.

If there is one word I could use to summarize the behavior of almost all Mongolians I know it would be pragmatism. They are grounded, calm, collected, logical individuals who are not easily fooled or manipulated. I personally like it a great deal, and I think a healthy dose of pragmatism can be a healthy thing. I think it may explain why a great number of Mongolians are either not religious, or if they are religious are extremely loosely tied to their faith where restrictions to lifestyles are mostly ignored or overlooked (such as the Red Monks of Buddhism, or the Islamic Mongols to the west who drink as much vodka as the rest of us.)

It does of course come with drawbacks. It can lead to limited imaginative flights of fancy and so creativity can sometimes be difficult to come by. Also if they do not see any time in the future when they will need to speak English they wont bother to learn it. Yet pragmatism does mean that when an examination is coming up where their scores will be known throughout their community it means the week before they button down the hatches and really get into the studying spirit.

Its so strange to see the degree of maturity kids can suddenly display after months of screwing around. All the tests are grammar based so there is no real need for me or even my counterpart to help. It all grammar! There’s lines to memorize and there memorizing it. They have become masters of what I perceive to be an imperfect system…no wonder its so hard to introduce a different style here.

So were not really learning in school anymore, just cramming. Still, the kids are doing the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. There sitting down and shutting up…I may cry.

So here’s a funny thing. On average I got a real shower in about once a month. Worry not, I soak up the grime collecting zones of my body more often then that but I really only get a hot water shower at a UB guesthouse in only one or two times a month tops. (the past two weeks I’ve never actually spent a full day there so I haven’t showered since April.) There was an initial period at the beginning where this was uncomfortable, but now I tell ya I actually have begun to enjoy the effect dirtiness can have on me. Without washing all the dirt, dust and grime that gets caked into my hair after a run my hair has a natural spikiness to it. Seriously I am around 6’5 because of my hair now. Also without the daily dose of showers I have a much greater sense of awareness about my body and how I feel. Showers desensitize us, but living in more Spartan conditions gives me a sense of real feeling.

After 11 months of this I do wonder to myself how will I ever be able to go back to it all. Showering everyday. Wearing something new everyday. Every type of food I could ever want to eat. No meat, no vodka, no windstorms that make it impossible to walk and living in a place where I am completely understood all the time. Sleeping on a mattress that I really like….THAT is really going to take some getting used to. Maybe ill get one of those bed setups where I don’t have a bed frame and just sleep on the ground.

When I first arrived here Mongolia seemed so new and interesting. Now Mongolia is the norm and everything about the way my life was before I got here seems so weird to me. Well…at the very least I have another year to come to terms with that, and afterwards nothing is really stopping me from leaving Mongolia anyway.

Ger news: I asked my boss if she knew a specific time that I would be moving to Bagkhangai. I am in no hurry but I found out that the next batch of Peace Corps Volunteers are coming a week earlier than we did (and they get to stage in San Francisco! I wish that had happened to us so I could have said goodbye to my stepfather in person) And while its not a requirement it would in fact be nice to be already moved in before the noobs arrive. When I spoke to my principal boss she obviously didn’t fully understand me but all I got as a definite was the month of June. I tried to explain the marathon and the eastern vacation would have me in various locations but I am not going to worry about it. Now that its warm enough out my balcony hammock swing is the most comfortable place in all of Mongolia.

Meanwhile, I am really getting revved up for my trip out to Arvaikheer tomorrow. Caitlin and I have been texting back and forth this week. You know how some people get along because they just are able to communicate well with one another? Well Caitlin and I have really good texting repore. That type of thing where we convey in two words what would usually take thirty if we were just talking and would lose all its wittiness were we to use so many words. This is going to be just what I needed. It will give me the charge to get through the final couple of weeks of school on my own too as my counterpart will be taking off to go get trained to be a Mongolian teacher for the new bloods showing up in under a month. Good gods in a month it will have been more than a year. That’s just flat out spooky. Days last forever, weeks flash by, months can feel like an eternity but after eleven months if you had to ask me if I was asleep back in America a week ago I couldn’t really tell you. Five star on the whole “time is relative” thing Einstein.

Caitlin claims to be the master of the game of Uno. Never has a challenge been issued to someone looking for a match so badly as I. Best part about meeting up with Caitlin is that this will allow blog readers to get to read the comparisons and contrasts of two of the more frequent blog recorders serving as M20’s. Better pack up, good times lie ahead.

May 14, 2010. Dragon Bus Terminal, Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Today’s Theme Song: “On the Road Again” by Willie Nelson

Well, this is an original spot for a blog entry. There are several bus stations in UB that service the country. I live to the east of UB and so I go to the black market, close to the bus station hub for the East. For the road west….well I have never been this way obviously. So I went to the Dragon Bus Station that handles traffic going west, such as me en route to Arvikheer. The trip to the bus station was not fun. I got one of those cab drivers determined to be an asshole. He kept pretending not to understand me so that he could change the price of the trip out here. It infuriated me on several levels. Money of course, also the manipulation, but I think what really gets me pissed is that he is calling my language skills into question…and that asshole understood me (wow I never swear)

So now im three hours early for a seven or so hour bus ride out to Caitlin’s town. I will say this about busses, while travel of this sort is never comfortable its loads and loads more comfortable than the meekers that I take to go back and forth from where I live. At this station are the jeep/buses that make the three day trek to the distant Hovd and Bayan-Olgii locals as well. I like the build of those jeeps, they look like they could (and have) withstood a nuclear fallout and they are designed to take a LOT of abuse. They have almost no shocks and riding in them is a bone crunching stress test that would test the will of anyone. Good luck and may the force be with them!

I meanwhile am just passing the time with books, music and blog entries. Caitlin told me this sometimes becomes somewhat of a party bus, but given the people currently here I somehow doubt that. Wont bother me one way or another, but as I said this is a long trip.

…2 hours later. Still waiting at the bus station. A few ladies and a dude in commando pants are currently occupying the bus. If this is anything like the meekers they will remain empty for another 59 minutes and then suddenly like were stuffing a clown car in a country without clown makeup will rush the bus and an otherwise completely comfortable setup will be trashed with loud and drunk people. This isn’t a complaint by the way, and after 11 months I have even begun to get into the spirit of it (figuratively, I NEVER drink while traveling for safety concerns) but still its strange to be so certain of what’s to come. Fifty-nine minutes to scheduled departure, we should play betting games about when buses actually leave…

May 16, 2010. Arvaikheer, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “He uses more swastikas than the history channel!!!!” – Lewis Black

…sorry I didn’t add more on after that en route bus blog. As the bus loaded up I didn’t want to demonstrate to a bus full of Mongolians that I possess a top notch laptop computer. So the bus ride sort of took forever. My bus driver was a bit of a coward and wouldn’t run over a patch of dirt without stopping and getting out of the bus to look at the dirt.

This winters zudd really ripped up the roads, so a huge bus spent a lot of its time bouncing up and down the dirt countryside as the concrete was all torn to shreds. I got into the town at 9pm. Pitch dark, never been here, and Caitlin is not there at the bus. Luckily I got her on the phone and after five minutes we united and I found myself in a karaoke bar. Five minutes after that I found myself singing “Play That Funky Music White Boy” at the top of my lungs. Caitlin later took me back to her ger and I fell asleep on her floor.

May 18, 2010. The backup cargo station, Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “EEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” –the kid sitting next to me. Hes a foot tall and has been making that noise without pause for over 2 hours.

Babies what the hell? Once is to be expected. Twice? Sure. Three? Yea all right. Four? Well that’s my luck I guess…but EVERY DAMN TIME???? COMMON!!!!! So today sort of all fell to hell. Its Tuesday, and of course I had been expecting to go back on Monday as I’ve never really been in UB on the weekdays as I am usually teaching. Before I got into a cab for the meeker back to my town I went to a unique supermarket and bought a couple of things. The first being a couple bottles of salad dressing. Its been a LONG time, but at last salads have come to Mongolia. I also bought a bottle of hot sauce for my counterpart Moogi. Part gift, also part apology for not being here at school today. Given what came next I would have given a significant sum to have made it back yesterday.

The cab driver was an asshole. Nothing for it, but he really was. Wouldn’t charge by the kilometer, overcharged me, and he drove me to the black market where the meekers usually meet knowing full well that it was Tuesday and that the market was closed. This meant that the meeker to Bagkhangai would not be coming to the black market but instead was on the other side of town. So now the asshole gets to double his rate to double back. That’s just money, and while yes it’s the principal of the thing that doesn’t bother me all that much.

I get to the cargo station. Some might see the black market and call what they see as madness. I respectfully disagree because once again, I have relativity. This cargo station is basically where every store owner in a hundred miles drops in every few weeks either in a meeker or in their own cars to grab the essentials and common items. It’s a third the size of the black market, and three times as busy. Madness would be an understatement. Luckily I have gotten the hang of the language and though id never used this station before after three failed attempts from drunk/bored drivers I finally got someone to point me to where the Bagkhangai meeker was. I got in the meeker, and was welcomed by a wall of screaming. I mean blood curdling. You’d swear they are waterboarding the kid he is whining so much. Nothing is even wrong! Usually I wouldn’t pull out my laptop in public, but I am seated in the meeker that is going to my town and it allows me to distract myself in some way. He’s not paused screaming since I got in here. I imagine we got another hour sitting here before we even start moving, then its another three or so hours banging down a road to Bagkhangai. I swear to the Sky Father himself that if I get home alive I will never leave my town EVER again. The trip out west was amazing, but for a distance of 300-400 miles I have never been on such a march of death type transport in my life. Make the bad buses stop!!!

May 19, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 3

Today’s Theme Song: -“The Peace Corps! Seriously!!! THE $^#%@*! PEACE CORPS!!!!!” –Lewis Black

I must have been a little more tired than I thought. The kid made sleeping an impossibility on the meeker ride back and a complication at my place kept me up and socializing the minute I got home for an hour so when my room was finally cleared out I just fell unconscious, but I feel its time I caught my journal/blog up with previous events.

So when last I left us it was a Friday night and I had finally made it to Arvaikheer. You know, aside from day trips to Nalikh during training, Arvaikheer is the only other town I’ve been in with a population over 5000 people aside from Ulaanbaatar. It was a curious sensation. First off, when I woke up on Saturday I had awoken to recall a lot of the catch up I had gotten from actively socializing with the members of this Aimag center. There was a LOT I had not known. As it is gossip I treat it as such and there was even some about me that I shot down that no one would believe me about, but once again its both Peace Corps and gossip so there’s nothing for it except to say that its my story and I am staying with it.

When I left Caitlin’s ger that morning I found myself in the middle of a full on town/city! I live in an apartment that if you turn right instead of left your instantly into the countryside with the nearest human made thing being the air force base miles away. Caitilin lives in a town five times my size with no building bigger that three or so stories. Needless to say (I hate when I put that down because obviously I am gonna say it anyway) the town is a little more spread out. It was not a particularly sunny weekend for Mongolia, but even so the town is still rather pretty. Surrounded by big hills and mountains (something I’ve sort of missed) and on a major road line of Mongolia, the town is both progressive while quaint at the same time.

Case in point about the progressiveness would be the vegetarian restaurant that exists in the town. It was very tasty, even if I just ordered vegetarian tsuivan. Funny still, the café seems to be run by someone who is a fan of some person on television called “the Grand Master” or some other regal title. Its this middle aged woman who talks about extremely vague and nondescript difficulties we have in life and how she needs not encounter them as she lives a stable life. Her monologue is translated into 15 dialogs, and an apparent past time of the PCV’s living in this town (there’s five or so, plus a few living in soums a few hours away) is to find the language on the screen aside from English that they understand and to sing along with the Grand Master. Obviously, lunch was fun!

One thing the aimag centers and the capitals have that I don’t back in Bagkhangai is people who are black. Wow, that sounds really weird to type but its kinda true. In the M20 group we had 69 volunteers and while we were diverse in terms of ancestry we didn’t have a single black person. When you don’t see anyone who is black for a long period of time after attending/living in some of the most diverse schools and places in America it really can just hit you that you forgot what it is to see someone who is black. The bigger cities also have Western volunteers who are not Peace Corps or American. Almost every European nation has their own version of the Peace Corps or some type of volunteer program where you take your skills and attempt to help out. To my knowledge I am the only Teacher Trainer who lives in a town instead of one of the cities, and while I definitely prefer my setup after living in it for a year I will say that if there is one thing that the cities have an edge on is the number of fellow volunteers you get to hang out with.

Most of the time though I spent was back in Caitlin’s ger. She is a fellow volunteer who gets a kick out of living in a ger, and so she had nothing but encouragement and interesting things to say when I told her about my upcoming ger move. Watching her in action doing chores and what not was an important lesson. Gers are fun… but its because you make them fun I think. As I had spent a night in a ger during the dead of winter, it was important to be in one during the spring as well, as more lessons awaited me. You see, in the winter there’s nothing for it. Its cold no matter where you are, but in the winter when its -30 outside you can put a fire in your ger and get that winter lodge feel of sitting around comfortably in a set of thermal underwear. In a ger at night its freezing but if you put on thermal underwear you roast, but if you try to sleep in boxers you freeze. Granted, I was also sleeping on the floor, but it was important to note that a ger doesn’t get all easy the minute the snow melts.

Coincidently, and very amusingly, the owner of said ger has a unique background prior to Peace Corps service. She is a French speaker and comes from the great state of South Dakota. We both remarked about how when we were interviewing with the Peace Corps they ask two questions in a row “Where do you see yourself working?” The next question is “Are you willing to go wherever you are needed?” I loved that, first of all because in the first question I answered “wherever I can be of assistance I will go” but also because it’s the REAL question. It’s the question where they find out if your interested in helping or if your interested in living somewhere specific. Anyways, back to Caitlin…

I come from the state where and inch of snow cancels school, and South Dakota is like Mongolia except they block their engines rather than start fires under their cars to defrost them in the winter. You would think that if my tolerance to the cold is strong that she could live in an icebox, but its not that way at all. She put on (and im not making this up) thermal tops and bottoms, thermal socks, sweater, sweatpants, a -20 sleeping bag and a blanket atop of the sleeping bag! I was sleeping on the floor with a blanket and my Nintendo pajama pants and a pair of boxers (cold but doing alright) There was something so funny about all of that but I just couldn’t think of how to say it without either it not being funny or insulting someone so I just giggled myself to bed at night.

Id like to tell you that the weekend was spent expanding my horizons, but in essence it was a weekend of laptops. We had files to exchange and youtube videos to show one another. Every Peace Corps volunteer at this aimag seemed to have internet access on their laptops (slow but still) and so they all seemed not only FAR more informed about current events than I was but also they had resources for their professions that I did not have. Of course, all this was forgotten when I was told that Lewis Black had plugged the Peace Corps in one of his more recent rants about Glenn Beck. As I have pledged so many times before, if I ever find a way to get internet in my town on my Mac I will do so.

Food was what motivated me to this as well. I ate French Toast, and Thai Spicy Peanut pasta. FOOD OF THE GODS! Caitlin said she was glad a guy had dropped in because it meant when she had leftovers that they would be instantly eaten, which of course they were. I have got to get married one day, though Ill probably fall in love with a girl who doesn’t cook either and we will need to live in New York so that we don’t starve to death!

And so indeed we spent the weekend paying way too much for good food and yakking with one another about our woes and playing killer games of Uno (I am 4 for 6 games) It really was heavenly, especially because this was a pack of PCV’s I haven’t had the pleasure of hanging out in over six months. Wow, time really is moving along. Most interesting to note were the varying attitudes of many of my fellow M20’s. Some seemed rather sedate and grunted. Others were like me and seemed to have some particular days of hardship and difficulty while at a whole were euphoric about what they were doing and that we have yet another year to work here. A select few also seemed ready to mark the passage of time by carving notches into the wall of the number of days remaining. The weekend as a whole allowed me to recharge and reenergize, and though I spent a fortune in food and transportation (more on that in a minute) I am glad I went.

Sunday night a hailstorm broke out. We were at the veggie place and when we saw a flash of lightning outside we figured if we hurried we would beat the storm back. When we stepped outside we found we were in the middle of a hailstorm. Seriously full on, hurts your face, BB gun sized pellets and lightning so close that it lit everything up in every direction all the way to the distant mountains. So we spent five minutes walking in this stuff, and Caitlin seemed no fan of the lightning so during that time I picked some really random topic and just started talking to her. I have never been afraid of lightning and while I have had a close call here and there in my life I know how unlikely the odds are of getting hit…but on a night like that and after nearly 10 months since id last seen lightning it reintroduced itself with a passion! We are about to enter the summer months, and spring is finally here! Go Mongolia!

So to leave on Monday I had to be up at the crack of dawn. The bus station had moved from the center of town to the far corner of town. This happened literally overnight. Thank crikes I had bought my ticket a day early to find this out. So I got to the bus and loaded in. I will say that in terms of comfort while the road may be longer these bus riders have it way too cozy! How does a bus with over 40 seats not have a single crying baby? Noones carrying huge crates of things or live livestock with them either!

The distance was long though and while the trip was enjoyable, the bus arrived late. Realizing I couldn’t make it to the meeker back to Bagkhangai in time, I just was going to have to stay in UB overnight. The Dragon Bus Station is on the far west of UB. Though the walk back to the center of town is pretty easy as its just one long road. So as punishment for myself for getting overcharged from a cab last time and due to the fact I was restless and I needed some exercise I walked it. Turns out it was around 10 kilometers and I was carrying all my gear…. Stern punishment! I got back to the guesthouse and a shower later I was using internet high speed style. Caught up with the family and I got a pizza to top off my already broadened palate. I was instructed by my sitemate Tripp where I could buy Salad Dressing and I did so. Some French and California type dressing. They didn’t have any Italian, but a year without salads doesn’t make you picky. I also bought hot sauce, as a gift for my counterpart Moogi and an apology for being a day late.

The next morning was recorded in my previous entry of crying babies and overpriced taxis and crazy markets. When I finally did get back to town I had Moogi and 2 school custodians at my school wanting to try to fix my still leaking sink. They spent an hour before deciding just to cement the leaking pipe and turned off my water. It was when I finally got everyone out of my room that I realized how tired I was. I saw on my watch it was only 5pm, but I didn’t stand a chance. I fell into sleep at long last back on my own rock hard floor. We imbue, some more than others. The things we interact with on a frequent basis become a part of us, even to the point that we can tell the difference between the uncomfortable feeling of our own floor rather than that of our friends. I lay down and felt as though I hadn’t slept in a million years.

I awoke to the setting sun for an hour before once again going deep into sleep, and when I awoke I saw that it was 8am and I had saved myself from missing school as I had forgotten to set an alarm. So now I find myself on my busy day without a whole lot of teaching going on because we are giving the kids the end of the year tests and its all reminding me that while I don’t know if I have a home anymore I sure as hell missed the towns of Bagkhangai and Ondortolge. Ill stick around for a couple of weeks…take it a little easy on the money.

And so we find ourselves here today. Normal life seems so foreign, and yet throughout the day ive felt myself calm little by little as I found myself not moving from one place to another or going to things I haven’t to before. The key to enjoying your work I think comes from having a hobby (like traveling) that you like to do while doing it and yet at the very end you find yourself glad to be going back to work.

“Work” though is pretty much over. The state required tests are being given and its too nice outside for the students to be bothered to come in from the outside today. After all, we graduated three weeks ago! Still, I find a way to put myself to use among my counterparts and in interacting more with my community. Its also the first day ill be able to run in a while (though the 10K walk a couple days ago definitely helped!) and I am spulging one time only to actually try and construct a salad to eat for dinner tonight.

Ah, Life…

May 20, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles:

Today’s Quote: “You know those guitars that are like…double guitars???” -Otto

This is a first. I am writing a blog entry in the school canteen. Usually I don’t like to flaunt my computer this much, but the school is half empty now that kids don’t come here unless they need to take the state tests. I just checked my tab at the canteen and I have just enough credit to feed me into the next week. Its very obvious that I am the only one in their books in the black and no

May 2, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “The things you own…end up owning you” –Tyler Durden. But, then again, he didn’t live in Mongolia did he?

Okay, well I have been forming this list for the past few weeks. I wanted to be a helper in all capacities, especially to the M21’s who are showing up this summer. The M19 and M18’s were all a huge help to me and I wanted to do the same. Before the M21’s show up I wanted to form a packing list. There were a number of things I am glad that I brought and other things that I regret not bringing….heck there are even things I brought that I regret, and while this list is completely my own opinion and in no way endorsed by anybody but me, I would like to think that those who bring a few of the things I list will find themselves rather pleased with themselves down the road. Once again, this is NOT an official list: but that doesn’t mean I don’t think it wouldn’t be a good idea.

The List of Items to Bring to Mongolia:

Hammock

Real simple, lightweight, and nonexistent here. Go to the army store or its equivalent where you live and grab a garbage string ten buck hammock. It’s the easiest way to get a comphy place to lounge in a country that hasn’t gotten the hang of a mattress let alone cushioned chair! If you find yourself with an extra five pounds to carry and some space in your bags (you wont but still…) while your at the camping store look for one of those collapsible lounge chairs that they make these days. This country has NOT gotten the hang of comphy chairs, and if there anything like my placement the chairs in your home will likely be ones they took from the school canteen with nails sticking out of them…I plan to buy one of these from the camping stores in Mongolia, but bringing it from America would be insanely cheaper.

Vegetable Peeler

Lets go through the list of non-meat foods that Mongolia has. Potatoes, Carrots Beets and more Potatoes. In short, your gonna havta peel a whole hell of a lot of food while here. My Mongolian mother would peel these with a giant knife, and while I admire her bravery and her dexterity I neither have her skill or bravery to peel in such a way, so instead I brought a vegetable peeler. Don’t buy the cheap one either! Go to some food utensil store specifically and find one top notch design and buy it. Okay, now bring two more…heck bring 5. They make for great gifts to Mongolian families and somehow I always seem to lose them. Cheap, small, useful…all the good things in life have those characteristics…okay most anyway. While your at it get a can/wine opener as well. Cant hurt.

Adaptors/Converters

First off….THERE IS A DIFFERENCE! I am a well traveled individual, but this was the first time I was taking appliances out of country for a long period of time, and as I stood and looked at plug adaptors and converters my mind hit a blank. An adaptor does what it sounds like, it takes the plug end of something in America, and allows it the correct plugs to go into sockets in this country. This means however that unless your appliance is able to convert that power your gonna destroy the electronics of said machine. (the mac store sells a package of all adaptor standards throughout the world, and it works for laptops as well as Ipod chargers and other Apple knick knacks so I recommend that if you go Mac like I do)

Heres a good rule of thumb. If your laptop has halfway between its power cord a square or rectangular box your in the clear. That is a converter and so all you need is an adaptor to convert the power from Mongolia to American standard. (pretty much any laptop less than five years old is pretty certain to have automatic conversion) But digital camera chargers and electric razors may not have this feature, and so you will need to purchase a converter. Now to save myself worry I bought everything that automatically converts power so I would only need adaptors, and personally I recommend it, but its your call. Bring one or two more adaptars than what you need….they are small and you never know.

Electric Razor

Im still amazed how blindsided I was by this. In Mongolia, we very rarely to

never have hot water. Even more rare is having a mirror above sinks. In fact the only reason I have a mirror above my sink is because one day while walking through the countryside I came across the rearview mirror of a car on the ground. All of this suggests that to those of us with Germanic ancestry (like myself) and who grow a beard in under two days need to shave, and shave a great deal. Buy an electric razor! You wont cut yourself. Everywhere you go in Mongolia you have some form of electricity. Just be sure you also bring a converter of power for your razor. If your truly old school bring a razor you can sharpen and practice how to shave blind. I learned how to do that, but its not something I would recommend even for the most dexteritious of us!

Handsfree Flashlight

While your at REI or North Face or whatever camping/mountaineering store you head to for supplies be sure to buy a headlamp. I was amazed how cheap they are. I bought mine for $20 and your gonna need it. Especially if you live in a ger. Its great for nights of reading when your power goes out and bathroom runs at night are tricky, and a handheld flashlight can be dropped down…yea… buy this! Cheap, easy to find, doesn’t exist here, small for transport. All the qualities you look for in things to bring to Mongolia!

Television shows and various video/audio files

Yes…you want to assimilate to Mongolian culture. You plan on spending as many evenings as possible drinking tea and listening to the eldest woman in your town tell you her worldly wisdom and her grandson play the horse violin. I COMPLETELY understand where your going with that….but what are you going to do with the other 60% of your time? Look you could be the most extroverted person on the planet and have pestering Mongolian neighbors and I promise you that being a Peace Corps volunteer in Mongolia comes with a lot of lonely nights, especially in the winter when the weather will confine you to buildings and neighbors cant be as hospitable because of the economic and weather woes of the winter. Bring video files for your computer. I came here thinking I was gonna spend maybe an hour a week on my computer because I would be so busy getting to know everyone in town….yea….bring stuff to watch on your computers. I recommend tv shows because they last longer and seem to have more replayability than movies….but of course bring movies too. Not even stuff you know or even like either.

My advice: Go to Itunes and pull up some random search for comedies or some title you have never heard of. Download a bunch of random seasons. A great feature about ITunes is that you can transfer the same video file to 5 other computers for free. So when you arrive and are sitting at Nayra’s café you can swap your video files with one another. One of you buys Star Trek while the other of you gets Saw VI and you give each other them.

Last bit of advice. There is a television cartoon show called Samurai Jack. I luckily brought that with me and without realizing it I found the excellent TV show to show schoolkids. The show is action packed, but PG rated, and they speak very little and very slow English in it so the students do not get overwhelmed by all the talking…so you can buy it….or you can try your luck that ill give you my copy when you get here…your call. If Avatar is out by June someone bring that…ive been meaning to see that… Bring Star Wars too…I forgot to bring that!

Kid Movies

I don’t care what field of Peace Corps you enter, your going to be dealing with an army of children. Kid movies are the way to go, but you need to think this through. They don’t understand a whole lot of English, so your gonna need movies that don’t consistently blabber on (Gilmore Girls is obviously out!) A great kid movie without too much talking is called “Mouse Hunt” with Nathan Lane. Its what it sounds like. Couple guys trying to get rid of a mouse…trust me the kids will be laughing their asses off, and theres barely any talking. Spongebob works but they see that on their pirated television. “The Tripplets of Bellville” is a great artsy cartoon movie with no talking in it that the kids will get a blast out of (be sure to skip the two seconds where they show a womans breasts though, the rest of the movie is completely harmless, and full of music too…which Mongol kids love. These films may be designed for kids but trust me. Three months into a Zudd and these will be your own best friend as well.

The Classic Books

Go to Barnes and Noble or one of those bookstores and there should be a table with all the classics. There in paperback, cheap enough and huge amounts of reading in a small package. Get em, bring em. Great Expectations, War and Peace, Sherlock Holmes, The Republic…blah blah blah. You got lots of time to spare in the coming years, might as well get these under your belt while out here. I love our PC library but its full of the Tom Clancy spy novel knockoffs that a 10th grader (in Mongolia) could write.

If you’re a Sci-Fi geek like me bring Douglas Adams’ seminal piece the Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and the L Ron. Hubbards ten book set Mission Earth as well. Better yet grab some books ironic to the Peace Corps such as “Give War a Chance” (I like that one actually) or “The Art of War” or even the book I think called the Five Rings written by that Japanese killing machine Miyamoto Musashi. Trust me….

Oh one other one, its not about Peace Corps or even Mongolia but its called “Rule Number 5: No Sex on the Bus.” Its an Australian telling his adventures as a European tour guide. Trust me youll laugh so hard no matter how many times you read it, and in Peace Corps sometimes you need a good laugh…

If you’re a true bookworm you may want to look up one of those electronic book pads that you can buy and download whole books onto a tiny electronic pad that will save on space, though I cant vouch for them as I don’t have such a device. My buddy Matthew did, and it looked pretty cool when he showed it to me. Also, if you buy books that are series based (I read Star Wars: Fate of the Jedi and of course the Dresden Files) this is a good way to remind yourself of little gifts arriving by mail as time goes on. My book series started a month before I left for Mongolia and the last book of the series will be released the month I return from service. I know how cheesy that sounds, but in a country without a whole hell of a lot of cheese you may just like it too!

Mosquito Net

We don’t have a whole lot of Mosquitos except near the lakes in Mongolia, but in the warm months we sure as hell have a metric ton of flies (fly: yatlah …probably the first word I ever truly learned how to say in Mongolian) Some of you will be doing your training in a Ger, and yes the flies and a few spiders will come, but also even living in houses without air conditioning or even doors that block off access to all the bugs that will intrude a meat infested hot home can be annoying. Some families may even have a net all ready for you, but seeing as they are incredibly cheap and small I would err on the side of caution and bring one. Cant hurt right?

Yo-Yo’s and Rubix Cubes

They cost a dollar, weigh less than half a pound, and will make you a million friends in Mongolia. I gave two of em to my cousins and kept a few for myself and still play with them to this date. You are about to withdraw from a great deal of stimulation, might as well bring some basic toys.

For the Rubix Cube, you can attempt to learn how to complete a rubix cube alone but there is an algorithm to solving it that you can watch on youtube. (punch in something like rubix cube solve or something like it) That way you can give them a rubix cube for them to try and solve and when they get frustrated you can demonstrate how to solve one yourself. Youll make yourself look awesome and if you still want a challenge with them you can always time yourself.

Maps

Go to a book store and ask them where they keep their maps. The big ones, that encompass whole countries or regions like all of America, Europe or China (with Mongolia covered as well) They make for good room decorations and fun lesson plans. Small cheap and light….see the pattern?

Inflatable Mattress and pillows

Didn’t bring this myself, but now that I think about this it would be ideal. I sleep on the floor of my apartment right now because my “bed” is made of solid wood without padding and has nails jutting out of it. BTW: Beds here are almost all single bed sized too! As a mildly stoic individual I have grown to love sleeping on such hard surfaces, but I can imagine that’s not everyone’s cup of tea. I imagine there are blow up mattresses that will make your sleeping arrangement far more comfortable than mine is, and it will be light and not take up a lot of space in your bags. Same with pillows. Now a pillow I was able to buy at the black market, but still…bringing one from the start would have been wise now that I think about it. Wow…I really do wish an M19 had made a list like this one before I showed up!

Duct Tape

Yup…the good stuff isint here, and I can think and have performed a million and one uses of the thing during my service in Mongolia. Bring a couple rolls along. Cheap not in Mongolia in good quality, and small for transport too!

Jump Rope

You may be the yoga king/queen but if you’re a cardio man like myself a jump rope is your only form of indoor exercise. As my previous winter entries proved there are some days where mother nature decides to ground you for weeks on end, and a jump rope is the best source of indoor exercise. Small, cheap, easy to transport…. Go ahead and grab a yoga DVD for some more winter exercise while your at it.

Good Big Set of Coloring Markers

Buy a BIG set of various colors, shapes and sizes. Cheap in America, small…and non existant in Mongolia except for the crummy Chinese knockoffs that break and dry in seconds. Anyone teaching needs these with a passion!

Frisbees, Foxtails and Hackysacks

Common…were Peace Corps. I don’t care if you’re a registered Republican who plans to vote for the Palin/Huckabee ticket in 2012, were all a little bit hippy at heart around here. So bring hippy toys. Though to give you some depth on it I add this. Frisbees are a little tricky to play with in Mongolia, because the wind is strong here and it comes on sudden and fast. Light discus can suddenly change course midflight. My Frisbee is the best one you can bring. It’s the orange ones without a middle. Literally just a ring of rubbery orange. The wind cant manipulate it as much. As for foxtails, I don’t know if you know what that is and you may have to google it or Amazon to buy one but in essence it’s a long sock with a ball at the end. You twirl it and throw, and the person tries to catch it further down the sock (harder) to win more points…Or you just throw it back and forth at one another with no points involved at all. This is especially useful in Mongolia because the wind doesn’t effect it as much and you can still throw it around like you do a Frisbee. Hackysacks aren’t completely necessary because when bored we even just hack with rocks, but you may as well go buy one and throw it in your bag. Small light and cheap….bring em. Fun note: A while back in some Aimag center a PCV made a Frisbee golf course. Wouldn’t work where I live because we don’t have trees but I think that makes my point.

Board Games

Didn’t see this coming. If you have sitemates this is especially important but also just all around use for close English knowledgeable Mongolian friends as well. Go to a place that sells board games and buy 4 (yes FOUR!!!) games that you may not know of. Monopoly Clue and Life can be a part of those five while your at it too. Take the games out of the box and ziplock all the pieces and cards and monies for the games and bring them along. Without the boxes the games take up very little space, and weigh very little. Especially given the usability of games. Youd be amazed how much fun game night with fellow volunteers is. In particular one game I can vouch for is called “Settlers” and that game is a minute to learn and a lifetime to master type. Its popular both here in Ondortolge and Avarikeer to my knowledge… probably other sites too. Mongolia has chess/checkers sets but you cant go wrong with board games.

Decks of cards are also of course useful. Playing stip poker in Mongolia can take around five or six hours as we all wear 20 layers. (and yes I am kidding I have never actually played this!!) But I will say the game of “Uno” is a blast and easy to teach Mongolians…especially kids

External Hard Drives

Flash drives and large terabyte sized external hard drives are useful. Almost everyone brings a laptop to service, and the transport of info from one computer to another is a lot harder when you don’t have the assurity of T1 connections everywhere you go. If your weighing options about buying/bringing a laptop may I suggest a Mac. Not to be cool, but Mac’s don’t get computer viruses and I can assure you that EVERY single computer in Mongolia that’s a PC is teeming with viruses and you don’t always have the internet to update your antivirus software…and yes macs are cooler too.

&*$#

Okay, my ancestry prudishness and knowledge that certain members of my family read this blog will mean that this one im not even gonna write what it is down, but I will describe it and most of you will get the jist. There is something that all men (and to my knowledge women) have in some form or another. When I arrived I did not bring this thing with me in Peace Corps service…and that was one thing I wish I had brought. Your going away for two years of service to a country that has VERY long winters.

Now I got lucky and about halfway through last winter a few fellow volunteers who thought a little bit farther forward than I did loaned me some of theirs, but yea…bring some of the thing im not writing down! Got it?

Final fun side note: I am even aware of a few female volunteers who brought the other thing that women sometimes use for the same circumstances that aren’t on computers as well….im gonna take it based on everyones snickering that they understand what im talking about. Good…moving on…

Clothing

The long and the short of it folks…clothes that don’t involve warmth should be the ABSOLUTE VERY LAST THING that you pack. You need good thermal underwear and shirts, and about four sets of really good wool socks. The type of stuff your gonna buy from REI or some type of camping store. After that…every other piece of clothing you bring with you to Mongolia more likely than not is not going to survive. We clean our clothes by hand and its hard water out here. My clothes are already showing the signs of decay, and I got a year to go! You need to worry about stuff you CANT get in Mongolia, like some of the items ive listed above. Bring ONLY ONE OR TWO of your most comfortable (not favorite but comfortable because these clothes will not survive, and that will likely bum you out to wear out your favorite) shirt, long sleve shirt, business shirt, business pants, jeans, and shorts (one of which doubles as a bathing suit!) Then bring a sweater and sweatpant. Then a handful of NEW boxers (NOT WHITE! Hehe…) and a handful of regular socks (both will wear out within a year but youll buy new ones here) A summer coat too that can take some rain (buy your winter coat when you get to Mongolia) THAT’S IT!!!! Stop putting clothes in your bags and go get some more unique American stuff to include instead!

Wine

Actually you obviously cant bring this, but I just miss the good stuff so damn much ill think up any excuse to get someone to bring some along. If you want buy some wine yeast and yeast strengthener and make some yourself with the grape juice you can find in the bigger towns.

Heres something I would argue against. I brought this but now that I think about it its been rather unnessecary. A solar shower. To begin with, this thing is bulky as hell and costs a LOT of money for in essence a garbage bag with a hose attached. Now, I grasp that we all have different living arrangements, but even in distant soum’s and gers without plumbing each town does have something of a “shower house” usually near a water station and for a thousand tugriks you will get a hot shower. Ive gone months without a thorough wash, and while I get you may not be all on board with this you cant use a solar shower in the winter anyway, and in the summer you will have either an apartment with plumbing or a yard to splash water on yourself without that device. So I would argue against bringing this, and if your truly annoyed when you get here that you don’t have one you can buy mine from me for twenty bucks. Its been used twice.

April 23, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Orders not back up with force are called requests.” -Vergere

Did you know that since I have arrived in Mongolia I have made twenty archived entries into the blog (not counting photos or video) Wowza… Last night Tripp dropped in and loaned me five minutes of his glorious internet. Its funny to think that in a weeks time its possible that I will own an internet card. Once again I will have ready access to pretty much any information I want to see at any time. Granted this will be incredibly slow, but I think going for a little under a year of my adult life without the use of the internet has suited me very well.

I learned a lot about myself during this time. I realize what the internet is to me. Like all things it’s a blessing and a curse. It helps me in some ways and hinders me in others. I think the boredom I sometimes face in the winter months will drive me to internet use that may not be particularly useful (I imagine ill be watching a great number of montage movies on youtube) but I hope to keep myself more busy next winter than I did this one. My ger residency will probably help that. Having continued and ongoing internet access may prove useful both in teaching next year but also in communication and general interaction with some that I have been less than chatty with. (those kids are gonna have an absolute blast with Google Earth. I am gonna show them all where I used to live)

…..Besides, in a month I move towns and I am losing plumbing…might as well gain some internet. If nothing else just consider it a practical decision.

Even with internet I intend to make blog archives like this one. At first I figured these entries would fizzle out as life got boring, and over some of those winter months it most certainly did, but now I have grown to like writing these, and this blog is as much for me as it is for anyone who bothers to read it… Strange how I never kept a diary or journal and now I do a daily record….what can I say, im pretty damn strange.

So last night Tripp also told me something shocking. My town does Naadam in August instead of July. What the hell??? I had a lot of trips planned with the intention of being back in my town for the Naadam celebration and now they don’t have it??? Well I guess I could also go to Erdene, see the family and watch their festival, or I am sure the trainees will get carted over to Nalikh or some other nearby town to do that festival and I could tag along…. But that may mean I am not around for my towns Naadam. Tragic, but like all things in Mongolia I have stopped trying to understand why things happen and instead have simply tried to jump on the band wagons as they roll by.

So this week wraps and I find myself a little lost about what to do. I might try hiking this weekend, its finally getting and staying warm enough.

April 24, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Were a generation of men raised by women…” –Tyler Durden

Yesterday after school I was sitting around my room. I got a txt from Peace Corps office telling me that there was a snow/sand/wind storm coming this weekend that was gonna be pretty bad. This was no problem though, as the weekend was going to be spent around here and not traveling to UB. I got a knock on my door. As usual, this is extremely odd. I don’t know if it was my fault or the simple fact that apartments don’t make for as congealed of a community as haasha families but aside from kids wanting to play cards I pretty much don’t get any visitors. (the haasha family is gonna help keep me more of an open person next year, I can tell already)

I opened the door and who should it be but Borte, Tripp’s lady friend. (That’s not really her name, it’s the name of Temujin’s wife and no Mongolian women are called that anymore, but I don’t want to put names of anyone not in Peace Corps that may not want them) Apparently Tripp was off doing something in the town of Nalikh an hour or so away and she while stepping outside for a moment had forgotten to bring her key.

She doesn’t personally know anyone in town and was freezing to death so she came to my place. Thank gods I was here! So with that in mind I spent about seven hours in my apartment yakking with her as we waited for Tripp to return. It was nice to talk to her. Her English is perfect and we had a lot to talk about in detail. She was curious what I thought about Mongolians, and I found when I actually explained it to her that this is the first time I had really thought this over.

Mongolians, much like Germans, Thais, Italians, Americans, Israelies and pretty much any nationality on the planet that I have spent enough time with or around to meet a bunch of said people have the same thing in common. People are a mixed bag. Some good, some bad, and a wide bell curve of ordinary people just interested in living out there lives more than willing to just be a ship in the night that just slips right on by. I also described how I think the process is not linear. Those in stable families and given every opportunity become sociopathic asses while there are those who come from nothing and make themselves into what they are today. A million nurture factors come up against who we are as people and when you stir the pot long enough you get whatever makes up…regardless of our nationality.

I talked to her about how I was moving to the other town in a little over a month and she joined all Mongolians in looking shocked and awed at just how crazy I was turning down a house in favor of living in a ger. She said that and the fact that I live alone that the people in my town will all call me “Old Man” The greatest irony that could exist would be that I end up hating living in a Ger. The outhouses where your poop freezes into a mountain and stacks up in the winter to the point that you realize why they cut two holes in the outhouse, the chopping wood when its freezing outside, the handling of coal for so long your hands are permanently black, flies, spiders, freezing at night, difficult to maintain temperatures, lugging water from a well, sleeping with your shaving kit in your bag so your shaving cream and toothpaste doesn’t explode….and doing all of this for a year…..no im sorry that just sounds like WAYYY too much fun for me to pass it up. All my bitching and moaning and once again I end up getting absolutely everything I ever wanted. I have GOT to learn my lesson about this, it would make matters SO much easier right from the beginning, and would save me some fatigue.

My own American sister has often looked upon what I liked doing with a certain lack of understanding. If she reads this she must truly be wondering… which one of us was switched at birth? Seeing as I have two VERY stable and salt of the earth parents I imagine it was me. My younger brother is a lot like my sister too, and im also a middle child, you know how that works…

We also talked about Asian/European/American men and women in regards to physical appearance. This is where I confessed my attraction to women from Europe and America to me have a slight edge over Asian women as well. Actually nationality for me has nothing to do with that either, but I described how the women I like are generally tall, long wavy light hair, bigger…yea..., colored eyes…and it was becoming pretty obvious this is going to be found a lot more in European and American and even Israeli girls than Asian.

This shocked her as practically every western man she had encountered had said the exact opposite. Go figure! (next time I do Peace Corps ill shoot for Macedonia or Bulgaria! And having said that lets be clear to everyone reading this that you pretty much are assigned a country based on your qualifications alone and not your “which women of the world do you think are hot?” list) She on the other hand could do nothing but rip Asian men and said that guys from Europe were the only way to go. I dunno, it just seemed like one of those conversations where you don’t learn as much from the person your talking to be realizing how a lot of the generalizations you make about people turn out to either be true or false. I also asked her what she though about black men, but she said she never had a tour group with a black man in it (she had a black American woman once though) so she had no opinion.

I discussed how age difference matters for me plus or minus five years. To her this was just flat out stupid and her retort of “Why don’t you like younger girls? They are fun!” was one moment where I laughed back and realized that I may the only one who actually is having a problem with this. She was also having a hard time accepting the idea of my self-imposed celibacy because I had not found the one yet. I tried not to come off like a complete girl to her so I described myself as the type that “mates for life” Which actually to her made a lot of sense, though she thought it was a stupid way to live and gave it a good laugh to reward my honesty. I did mention that celibacy only counts in regards to sex and that I do indeed date and make out where warranted, though this to her probably made me sound like a Mongolian young teenager.

The problem with talking to her or any other Mongolian is the same reason its hard to talk to an American and to get a median of values and ethics of a particular culture or people. In a country as big as Mongolia theres a wide range of Mongolians. Some city, some countryside. Some devout, some liberal. She for example is a city girl, young and pretty with skills such as language knowledge that enable her to provide quite wealthily for herself as well. She interacts with people from all over Mongolia as well as other countries.

I thought of myself and realized how I would indeed be similar to her as well. Born into the American bourgeois, raised by parents with slightly opposing but never radical political thought, raised in the suburbs of one of the most internationally diverse regions in the WORLD, college educated and two masters degrees so I posess qualifications and skills that also ensure an adequate amount of wealth for comfortable living, and I too have spent much of my adult life interacting and traveling through many of the countries and peoples of this world. In essence, I believe that we are both very progressive individuals, however a great number of those both in America and Mongolia that would not have encountered this amount of interaction may not share these views.

The ultimate litmus test I think of a country’s wellbeing can always be found in looking at its percentage of middle class. (India has the worlds largest middle class but is still relatively poor given that 1 billion people live in the country… though I do see India, not China as the next great world power) Its not about being wealthy, but the ones who have found themselves one or two steps up Maslows hierarchy for an extended period of time (as in several generations). Its in this that people start to overcome prejudices and are more open to learning about people who they consider different, and then realize that were really not that different. Its not about finding out whose right or wrong….everyone thinks they are right and that will get you nowhere but frustrated. Its far more useful to find out WHY people think they are right. I think that is where you can both understand people more but also predict their reaction to changing events.

…wow… sorry everyone there was a bit more in there than I expected to put down…getting back on subject…

She works as a tour guide leader for Westerners and said that over the summer if she picks up any groups of hot European girls that she would be sure to swing by Bagkhangai so I could “personally” give them a tour of the abandoned Soviet Air Force base in town or even tag along for some adventures out in the countryside! See??? Not getting to be a trainer is getting sweeter and sweeter this summer! Though it is becoming clear I will need to stop off in the black market and get some gear. A water filter and a Chinese knockoff tent….that shouldn’t be too much Borte estimates it around 50-60 bucks. I was expecting WAY worse, and push come to shove I will shell out more, this summer escapade WILL happen.

She mentioned that when she talks to Westerners about how she knows people in Mongolia who work in the Peace Corps the answer is universally the same. A bunch of smiling faces of people so proud that something so noble from America as the Peace Corps is out here representing. An ego is a terrible terrible thing and I will say that comments like that are enhancing it probably in an unhealthy way but truly how cool is that that everyone seems to know us!

Strangely though, when I met a pair of Austrians a month ago in UB they knew of Peace Corps but believed that we were some sort of volunteers who join the military but don’t want to fight so we volunteer as such. I was glad to help them sort that out. I gotta one day get a sticker or something to throw on a backpack. I had actually tried to find one before I left for service, but Peace Corps is obviously not really in the souvenir business. Ill figure it one when I am back stateside.

So while last night was unexpectedly chatty I am afraid this weekend will be rather boring. The snow/sand storm has hit and the wind is pretty damn strong out and the moody clouds have brought the weather back down to freezing even during the day and the color of the clouds let it be known that at any point there will be dumping snow out of the sky. Out of boredom I made a video tour of my apartment and to top it all off instead of buying alcohol I bought eggs and tried to actually cook them. I think ill stick to hard boiled ones from now on…or the alcohol. I could call up Tripp but given that hes helping me out next weekend I don’t want to overstay my welcome and so instead I am playing a few video games, which in fairness I have not done in quite a while.

It will hopefully be the last weekend as such for a while. Next weekend will be quite busy both as graduation at my school happens and then I head to UB both to aid in editing some video with my computer and then seeing if the internet card is available. After that weekend it’s the month of May, and while March and April certainly have shown me that Mongolia does not follow the temperate zones of the past it cant stay THAT cold THAT long…can it? For the record again im not actually complaining about the cold…for I do like the cold, I just want to spend more and more time outside! Picky picky huh?

April 25, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “It’s like having drunken midgets running around your house” –Dennis Leary’s explaination of having kids.

The skies cleared but the weather and the wind most certainly did not. Were back into freezing temperatures with wind that knocks you off your feet. It was amusing to go outside to buy some potatoes today and as I walked past my main city square it was absolutely deserted. For the past week kids were playing and people loitering in the area as the 5-10 degree weather allowed us some degree of outside interaction…and now its all just gone cold again. The abandoned look is so depressing now that I have seen this place active again.

I bought, peeled and boiled a kilogram of potatoes today. With the cold weather back and the lack of time in which I had just eaten plain old potatoes like this it was amusing just how much this all seemed to feel like it was September or October all over again.

Boredom has definitely hit me of late a little harder than I would like. Peace Corps docs told us this was the time to watch out. The time just before the dawn of warm weather. Its not like in December when you are VERY aware of just how much more time you have in the cold left to endure. Instead with it being the end of April you constantly feel as though tomorrow very much could be the day in which it all goes warm…the tease. The 25th mile of a marathon as I wrote about before. I was glad that Peace Corps warned us about this, it reminds me that I am not alone in all of this.

So to pass some of the time I picked up my phone and started txt’ing a lot of the volunteers I interact with the most over this past year. Many a volunteer now has internet either personally or they live in an Aimag center which has an active and fast internet café so I find that they often know a LOT more about whats going on in the world than I do.

The majority of them are M’19’s and therefore at the end of this cold weather they even get to go back to the world of Wi-Fi everywhere you go and a diet of fruit, fruit and nothing but more fruit. So they are even more on edge than I! Hopefully ill bond with the M21’s, my group the 20’s I just found far too tame and sedate and distanced from…or maybe I just picked a clique of M20 friends that all decided Peace Corps was not for them…either way befriending the 21’s is a wise step, and having made all my dumb mistakes BEFORE they arrived im sure ill hit it off.

So we all had one major gripe that I wanted to post. If you watch American television, Peace Corps every now and then gets mentioned. Usually a character is either a returned volunteer or is intending to volunteer. We find the characters and their qualifications to always be wildly inaccurate. For instance that girl from Community would NEVER have been able to join the Peace Corps without a college degree. Barney from How I Met Your Mother was planning on becoming a volunteer in South America despite not having a perquisite knowledge of some Spanish, and though I personally don’t know this one someone told me Callie from Greys Anatomy would never have been let into service either.

Though we all agree that Survivor could not only use a volunteer, but if they really want to give the contestants a hard place to live they just need to be dragged out to Mongolia. Where in Mongolia though is hotly debated, as practically every region has its own unique difficulties. The north reached -56 Fahrenheit this winter, but has lakes and rivers for camps. The Gobi is of course one of the least populated areas on the planet. The Altai mountains are exotic and beautiful as well as rugged and difficult to live in, and finally us steppes folk can vouch that the rolling hills are no rose garden either. Someone call up that guy who runs that show!

We also like to txt about what we see from exactly where we are. A sort of “What are you wearing?” question that is more Peace Corps specific. Arent we a quirky bunch??? I often wondered why at my previous job the returned volunteer guy named Anthony never really talked all that much about his time in Peace Corps. I know this is a rather chatty blog but as I mentioned before this is either a book deal when I finish service or its some kind of defense mechanism for me to have something to talk in depth with. (good god, my computer is Wilson!) But seriously one on one talking to someone who hasent personally done this…I haven’t a clue what I would tell you. Ill have to put some thought into that.

Much like yesterday I decided instead of drinking alcohol to buy something exotic to eat today. Todays menu item was a jar or pickles that I have been looking at in the store for months now. You know, if there was ever a sign of a bachelor lifestyle it was me sitting on the floor my room, where I sleep on a floor next to a bed with nails coming out of it, sitting full lotus style eating half-assed pickles from a jar while watching “Black Hawk Down” As usual it’s the moments in life you don’t take pictures of that you will remember forever.

April 26, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Theme Song: “Nice Time” By Bob Marley

Today the culture center put on performances by the kids in my school. Some were some of the dances of the show back in March, and then there was a few skits too. I may be bored out of my mind these days, and I get that they are kids….but those performances were just absolutely unacceptable. Noone knew ANY of their lines and half the time was spent just fumbling around with microphones. Quite unimpressed.

Today the weather defies decription. The sun is out and shining, its about 25 or so degrees Fahrenheit outside…but the wind. It was bad yesterday, today its legendary. Buildings of cement literally sway under the power of this wind. I begin to see just how easy it was for early many to worship the elements as deities themselves. There are moments where walking into the wind I cannot even inhale air its so powerful. When I look at my balcony made of concrete and steel and see pieces of rock grind apart from the tension of the parts bending to the wind… you know now that I think of it if I were ever to become a man of faith again I would be shamanist or some kind of worship of nature itself. Living in Mongolia has given me a really close look at what power there is in that. This kind of wind is only usually found during a hurricane or some kind of storm. Not counting the wind it appears a bright and sunny day… even after a little under a year it all seems so out of place.

I gave my friend who lives in the deep Gobi a call today. Evidently this wind is taking place all over Mongolia right now and the sand storm that this wind would cause, thank the gods its not yet hot in the Gobi because wind blowing hot sand at this speed would melt and flay your fracking flesh. He texted me saying that he is indeed being stretched by this weather. What its like in the mountain passes of Gobi-Altai…this is no country for cold men!

So tragically this means I am spending yet another day indoors. Goin stir crazy these days, but as I always say…nothing for it. If the wind blew like this on race day I would seriously question if I could successfully finish a marathon. The 20 mile run will take place sometime this week but first this weather has really got to calm down some.

Peace Corps dropped in today. Bagkhangai and Ondortolge housing needs inspection. Basically the applications for host family volunteers is all in and now Peace Corps needs to pick which families have the best setup for hosting. Here in Ondortolge where I don’t think there allowed to host them in the apartments (too luxurious) the list of spaces cant be very big. From the window I counted the number of houses and gers that exist in our town and the number was under thirty. Given that some of these are not going to have the necessary accommodations (a specific “bedroom” and a door…plus a bunch of other stuff im not gonna list) that would indeed cut the list of spaces available pretty damn quickly. Well im sure there experienced in picking out good ones. They picked out my host family in Erdene didn’t they? Cool side note, my sister whose an English teacher is getting a major feather in her cap. She gets to be an English teacher in Erdene for the trainees this summer. That is GREAT news not only for her but to the M21’s that she will be teaching. Lucky buggers.

Anyway a great side note to Peace Corps arriving in my town today is that it means that they brought the package that my family had sent me. I was going to have to lug that back from UB this weekend but now they have saved me the trip. It was from my dear sweet Aunt, (actually while perfectly kind and nice to me I am not sure that dear and sweet would be adjectives I would use to describe her) who sent along a plethora of spices and boxes of wine. The wine I most certainly will enjoy, and the Mexican food will make a world of difference in terms of actually enjoying the act of eating again, for a meal at least. No matter, care packages are kinda hard to screw up. Aside from Tootsie Rolls I cannot think of a single thing people can send me that I wouldn’t like…never gonna let that one go am i? I am however trying to bank up some of my stored foods for when I have go on some of my summer explorations.

So that’s life I guess…

April 27, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Im pretty sure at this point you don’t even know who Ghandi was…”

Well Moogi had some Peace Corps news for me. Turns out they found enough workable spaces in Ondortolge and given that this is where all the logistics of the two towns are and where those that can teach them how to play horse violin of dance, they are going to have 12 volunteers in Ondortolge and 6 in Bagkhangai. That works too, but I imagine that will make for some close quarters to the volunteers in Ondortolge. Good so they’ll get to bond.

The wind doesn’t go away, and it gets colder. Quite unfortunate given how I am feeling these days. I need some outdoors time, I can feel the general awkwardness and discomfort from all my time spent indoors, and unlike in the winter when there is a VERY good reason not to go outside the fact that its just 25 or so Fahrenheit with wind that knocks it down another 10 degrees is what is making me annoyed. Its too damn pretty outside to be this fracking cold. I have officially decided today to go to Mercury market this Saturday after I try to get internet and buy the insanely priced bottle of salad dressing so that in the month of May I can feed myself some greens. Cabbage, onion, carrots, some peppers and maybe a crappy and overpriced tomato….That simply was inevitable, and with this weather I could use a morale booster. I could also use a good run, but with this weather I seriously fear whiplash if I were to run into the wind.

Classes went well today. Moogi and I sorta did some of our best team teaching, and I got a further explaination as to how and who I am teaching next year given that from now on all 10th and 11th grade classes are taught exclusively in Ondortolge. Works for me, it may mean that my goal of donating a dictionary to every kid in my school a real possibility. Though the classes went well I can tell that autopilot has been engaged by both students and staff. In the younger kids this means being wildly rambunctious as ive mentioned in previous entries. In the older kids it means absolute silence and a lack on interest in even opening their books, let alone repeating after me. Nothing for it, and if I wasent so bored out my mind I would probably find school to be a boring thing too.

Nothing else to report on really. It’s the end of April and theres snow on the ground and its been below freezing during the day for six of the last eight weeks. What’s the temperature where you are just now? I remember at the start of the cold weather while sitting in my kitchen boiling water to make boiled potatoes I asked myself “will I go mad?” I am pleased to report that if I were to have it would have been earlier, but sitting on the verge of outdoor stimulation and recreation I am not going mad, but I can VERY easily see how some who do not share my love of new (albeit boring) experiences may have found themselves in a different point of view.

One thing I am still astonished at is the number of M’20s that are using the summer to go back to America. Seriously between the number of 20’s I know going back to America for vacation and the ones I know that got jobs as trainers I can only think of a single volunteer to visit during my travels over the summer. Perhaps my astonishment carries with it a touch of jealousy…but then I thought it through a little more. In terms of money between going back to America or tearing it up through Mongolia, that’s a wash. Though the cost of the ticket would be daunting, my families abodes and leeching off their free stuff would probably balance out to some of the crazy stuff I have planned for the summer like Horseback riding around 1% of the worlds freshwater, traveling out West on a bust ride that takes 3 ½ days, and so on. Yet as I mentioned the only thing that really peeved me off about my placement was my lack of proximity to some of the more distant locales of Mongolia. Unlike at the last break though where a lack of fellow travelers cut me off, I make my pledge right here and now that I will travel alone if need be.

Actually ill stop myself right there, that’s whats annoying me. With all the M20’s back in America or teaching the noobs, the M19’s leaving and the M21’s all learning how to say “bi Maahand dortay!” all summer there will hardly be anyone for me to drop in on. This will NOT stop me from excessively traveling this summer though…mark my words. Instead I imagine the summer to have Mongolia teeming with tourists, and theres gotta be some traveling German girls like the ones I met back in June that could use a tall white guy with a grasp of the Mongolian language to wander this amazing country with. In fact I will say that id probably have tried to travel back to Germany or Eastern Europe before I would have looked up flights back to America. It seems so healthy just how detached I am from America while still knowing that’s who I am. Cant explain it I guess.

April 28, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Nobody gets out alive.” – Al Swearengin

Today was yet another presentation day of sorts. This one I think having to do with the kids infrastructure and all that. Basically they had kids read a prepared text verbatim about the stats of kids graduating this year (the 100% pass record is still going strong despite the fact we haven’t even given, let alone made the tests!) I dunno, I think I had a few bad dreams last night and was not in the mood to sit for four hours through yet another procedural ceremony. I once put down how I didn’t think that peoples personalities changes all too often after young adulthood, barring extreme traumas or alienations, but while sitting there with time to spare I thought this through.

I find pomp and procedure for the sake of procedure infuriating; of this I have no doubt and my unwillingness in the past to oblige those who find use in such to be a major weakness. My time in Mongolia so far has not changed my dislike of this pomp, but I feel as though it has done me a kindness and a lesson. I now know what REAL pomp looks like.

I used to bitch and moan about having to wear ties to work. The idea that I was to be respected more for wearing formal clothes to me just reeked of skin deep assessments of one another. Come to think of it to this date I still feel as though the idea that we judge and rank someone on the types of clothing that they wear is the exact opposite of what we should be doing. I made a stink about this in my previous professions, and did everything short of direct disobedience in an effort to frustrate those who enforced these policies.

As I sat today in that crowded auditorium going through yet another “ceremony” as opposed to the two we had last week about other issues I think back to my dislike of formal clothing….THAT was my biggest complaint! THAT was what infuriated me, for I hadn’t four hour ceremonies about things that were fake to begin with. I don’t think that procedure for the sake of procedure is any less annoying, instead I now have some relativity. No matter where I live or what I choose to do with the rest of my life I begin to see that every other difficulty I have is gonna seem so mundane and minute compared to some of what I am going through during my time in the Peace Corps. What? They don’t have MY brand of hummus? Oh wait, I lived in a country where I ate six things almost all involving meat for two years. Aw dammit the heaters broken……ZUUDDDDD!!!!!!!

We don’t change, but the longer we live the more relativity we aquire…. Least I hope so. So yea, if I choose to wind back up in some formal profession back in America and I roll out of a full sized cushioned bed and shower just like I had the day before and I am about to go to some heated/air conditioned office and make more than $3.50….yea ill wear the damn shirt and tie. (But there both gonna be jet black, if were going to judge people superficially I might as well come off intimidating)

For the second long day, teaching wasent all so bad. The kids actually seemed half interested in studying quietly today for some insane reason and me and Moogi used the quiet to type up the tests for 9th and 10th grade. And by “we” I wrote them up and Moogi looked on in amusement at just how much more fun life is with a secretar….Peace Corps Volunteer living in your town. Savor the flavor Moogi, I move in a month….to get used by another set of lucky teachers. Fun fun!

The wind died down today. By that I mean that its scaled back from wind tunnel to a simple pain in the ass to walk into and be sure to spit to the side instead of in front of you kind of wind. Tomorrow I gotta get a small run in to prep my legs for the 4 hour ordeal I am going to put them through on Friday. This last week has been impossible to run, and I really could use a few more 3-5 milers, but I am out of time. This run needs to happen right here and now, and my UB trip this weekend is not gonna give me the luxury of doing it then. Wish me luck!

April 29, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Number of Miles: 20+ not sure exactly. Probably a lot.

Today’s Quote: “Sometimes I feel as though im David in a world without Goliaths…”

Too damn nice outside. That beautiful Mongolian sky shining down on us. I tell ya with that georgous orb staring at me all day and having felt the elemental power of the wind shamanist worship of nature and the elements of the Earth is getting more and more inviting. Warm enough, probably even near 50 today and the wind…down to about a steady 15-20mph, you feel it but after the wind tunnel of the past month it felt wonderful. Couldn’t pass it up. I hadn’t run in a week, and that had been the 18 miles run no less. Hadnt really stretched all that much, and had a very empty stomach….what can I say….do I know how to run or not?

So I did my dance of returning from school and instantly changing into my running clothes so I couldn’t talk myself out of it. I munched down a few of the power bars my Aunt sent me (ill save the goo for the actual Marathon…again Aunt Susie and everyone who contributes to her packages you all so rock) and with a belly full of water I headed out. Two hours into the wind, two hours and a little chump change from walking a little bit back…. WOLF!

As ive said before, once you get a solid few months of 3 mile runs or longer youll find that your brain gives out well before your lungs or your legs do. You just gotta find ways to trick yourself into being alright or distracting yourself. High decibel music can help on longer runs, imagining your doing a Rocky fitness montage also works. Basically I have a vivid imagination, and so even in bad shape….i still run, and run a whole hell of a lot!

Running the way I do presents a challenge though. I run on the main road between my town and Ulaanbaatar, and while beautiful I am afraid that in the 30ish kilometer run there is not a single shop, store, or even structure. So basically without my running belt you gotta ask…how the hell do you hydrate? I bring water with me, but you should know water is actually a pretty heavy and bulky thing and without the ability to strap it onto your body it can be very cumbersome. I ran to an hour and fifteen minutes before I put the half finished bottle down on the side of the road so I could pick it up on my way back.

Mongolia is dry….i mean DRY!!!! Were just north of arguably the most inhospitable desert on the planet, and all around it just feels like the air itself is trying to suck every drop out of you. Running makes you sweat, and I was already pretty dry. Near the end of that run I was so dehydrated it literally felt like sand was coming out of my pores.

Still, I finished and with just enough energy to get back into my apartment and down a couple liters of water and a package of tuna to get my body a little protein. When you are physically in the act of running long distance, eating is critical, which poses a difficulty because when running eating is the last thing you would ever want to do…thats why those goo packages are so important, one quick disgusting squirt and you got 250 runner friendly calories coursing into your body. However, once your done running the feast of food and the beer they usually pump out to the champs rocks. I remember the first marathon I ever ran at VA Beach where Papa Johns had signs along the marathon course that said “Pizza: Carbohydrates, Fat and Protein all in one!” Only at a marathon would a pizza company take pride in something like that!

So that’s that ladies and gentlemen. After nearly 5 months of being house ridden by freak windstorms and the toughest winter in 30 years I was successful at in a months time bringing my long distance runs from 6 to 20. Now with a little over a month before the race I spend the next two weeks just going 3-5 miles daily and around 10 on a weekend run (suddenly that distance seems so utterly small!) and then in the final two weeks 3 mile fast runs every other day until its time to tear up UB. I just realized that I don’t know if we get a medal for finishing this or not….no matter, but it would make for a nice decoration in my ger. This Marathon has special importance to me, for if I successfully complete it I will be a 5-time Marathon Man. VA Beach….Richmond….Phuket, Thailand…. Philadelphia…..Ulaanbaatar. (Itll never be said I am not a diverse man.) That’s something for all of us to brag about! I should really get my brother in on this, hes at the age when I did my first race, and it would be nice to talk to someone during the races…scratch that my brother almost never talks in the first place…ah heck he still should run a marathon with me…my sister and dad too….and mom….and my stepdad…..come to think of it even Grandad and Grandma should get in on this! I can just hear my Grandad going “good night!!! As we reach mile 15 and my Grandma would just keep saying “my land!!!” as we hit the 20 mile marker Okay…im obviously encountering a “runners high” right now so ill change the subject.

One thing I do love about running is the ability to basically think about…well everything and nothing at the same time. I only bring my Ipod with me on the weekend long runs though, and during a brief period of walking/drinking without music I was thinking about stereotypes that people have of Asians. It was a line in a movie I was watching, and then after NOT laughing at the stereotype I analyzed why. I came to the following conclusion: I live in an Asian nation that breaks EVERY single Asian stereotype that exists!

Seriously how did I not think this was so cool until just now? Throw out your stereotype and I can counter it. Heres some of the biggies. They cant drink, or if they do they redden up (im quoting Ms. Margaret Cho btw…) Whooooboy, Mongolians can drink! Seriously in terms of alcohol content and amounts drank, Mongolians outdo even Russians. Men and women as well….they all drink. Heck 5th graders are given the fermented horse milk in the summer! Theres a major stereotype out the window.

Next up….Asians are short and thin. Not in Mongolia at least. Granted the all meat diet probably contributes to this and at 6’3-6’4 I am the tallest man in a town of 2000, but I can state I know a couple six footers in town and by and large (pun intended) Mongolians are probably on average only an inch shorter than Americans! They also are all fat, and by “fat” I mean they carry their weight in their gut, but unlike in other countries like America noone here is out of shape. The fattest guy I know who chain-smokes the most lethal cheap brand of cigarettes Mongolia makes is my schools Gym teacher. That’s amusing….its like watching a pulmonologist smoking outside of a hospital or something.

How bout the whole: “All Asians look alike and its impossible to know how old they are” Not true on either account in Mongolia. I can tell you a total strangers approximate age in this country just by appearance and EVERYONE in this country looks a little different from one another when I take a look around. Though as I mentioned in a previous entry, everyone in my town believes I have the exact appearance of the red bearded sitemate of mine Tripp…we look NOTHING alike. All Westerners look the same to Asians I have met too, but hearing that got me thinking and this is what I assess from that.

Pretty much Mongolians fly in the face of every single stereotype that Asians are bestowed by Westerners that I know of. Now at first I wondered if this was because as some in Asia would classify the Mongolians as having ancestry from the far West and not the early Chinese civilizations, but then I realized something that made even more sense and best of all demonstrated something enlightening to me.

Stereotypes exist to classify something or someone you don’t know a lot about…. After living in Mongolia for around a year I now understand and see a lot more than I knew before, and so all of those gross summaries of certain people from Asia do not apply to anything I see. That’s the cure to undoing stereotypes, not disputing them, but instead learning more about one another their undoing will occur naturally. That’s the kind of discovery that at 29 can keep you a liberal and a hopeless romantic into the years when those who are more conservative in nature would say “the age of innocence comes to a close, and the age of reason gains ground” to quote a more conservative family man/friend that I know.

Life is good…..running can do that…

April 30, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Never trust a computer that you cant throw out a window”

Graduation day. Now granted I would be headed to UB now if I weren’t here for this but even with that bias I will say this ceremony has a shocking resemblance to the first day of school. Everyone washed their hair, everyone put back on their bank teller/French maid uniforms and in essence we stood at the front of the school while the big shots all talked about the kids hopes and dreams.

Okay actually it wasent all that bad, it just seems to me a little ridiculous to have this a month before school actually comes to a close. Its another beautiful day outside. Still need long sleeves but seriously I don’t know if I even need my Fordham University jacket anymore. I am really grateful for these past two days of weather after the week before. I sorta needed a pick me up and as ive said before I am tuned to the weather. Being able to sit at the culture center steps and watch the kids play some violent form of basketball…it just makes me feel good. Gods that makes me sound like such an old guy! Im gonna start talking about going to the pond and looking at the ducks after this!

Tripp stopped in to say hi at the graduation too. It was good to talk to him. He is coming to the end of his Peace Corps service and is looking into staying in Mongolia to work. His knowledge of Mongolian is practically encyclopedic so I guess he can really write his own ticket. Lucky him. Its strange to think of being around here without him. As he will likely be residing in UB its likely ill see him now and again but in the many occupations I have worked in people come and go….its not a lonely life, just one where you realize that really clicking with people is not going to keep em close forever. Go figure.

Tomorrow is a busy day. Only got one full day in UB and theres internet cards to buy if there available, I gotta edit that software for the alcohol awareness video in the Peace Corps office, then I need to buy some salad dressing (yes I am doing this!) and I gotta spend a little relatively fast internet time. Pizza eating and beer drinking too…lets not forget that either. I figure ill upload this entry and start a fresh one for May. Additionally I got something Ive been building up for a while. An unofficial and informal packing list for those who in a little more than a month will be finding themselves in Mongolia. It sorta started as a lark, but now that im putting a few final touches on it it surpasses my greatest hope.

I hope UB has a couple PCV’s wandering around. Would like to catch up with a few, and I REALLY want this weather to stick around too…I may delude myself but with the weather this warm they may have even started to open some of those beer gardens again (benches and tables for outside drinking, but when you’ve been cooped up all day a beer garden takes on many forms!)

March 25, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Yea, Korean food rocks….why the hell did we do Peace Corps in Mongolia?” – A mildly inebriated PCV demonstrated both their assimilation, desire for spice and their cultural sensitivity when they blurted this between chopsticks of Korean Food earlier last week.

Well you will notice a lack of a weeks progress in the blog from this one and the next (all ten of you reading) Well that’s because the past week I have simply been far too busy. What with eating pizza, drinking something other than vodka, applying to run a marathon and grabbing two huge jars of Peanut Butter and and about ten great geeks book that will keep me occupied for months….well ive simply had no time for blogs. But at long last I find myself back at my site with my rock hard bed, closed food stores, windy skies and iced over roads with dogs who seem to be the only other people in this country that actually enjoy Peanut Butter….home sweet home.

So yea…UB. Every time I show up in that town something new happens. This time I was not the only PCV in town, in fact quite a few had shown up. We all bunked in the same room and did what we usually do. Talked about the two things PCV’s talk about with one another: Food and Sex. We hung out at Greater Mongolia bar where the bang Altan Urag plays their 20 minute performance and we all did our best not to eat the plates as we ate every type of food put in front of us.

Some of us went on day to day private chores like seeing girlfriends or going to interview for upcoming jobs or sign up for marathons but in essence it was a week of us hanging out. Its still just too damn cold outside to do anything fun really, so everything involves going into a place. The roads are losing some ice but its just not possible to escape it yet…It will! Give it a month or two more.

We swapped music and games and gave each other in depth conversations. The conversing with someone that you can articulate yourself with is something you never even realize is a luxury until you fight to make yourself understood. Go figure.

While many PCV TEFL’s have another week off including myself last night I was becoming aware that this decadence was getting to me. It was costing a fortune, I was getting bloated from all the eating I was doing and in all honesty daily showers aren’t even that enjoyable to me anymore, so I headed back. Luckily I had taken all my winter clothing to UB to wash in a washing machine instead of doing it by hand, meaning that my clothes that I wont be wearing anymore (thick wool socks, heavy winter sweaters) are now all clean and so next fall when the cold returns I wont find myself slipping on something smelly and uncomfortable. I am not a man of forward thinking in regards to the little things in life. Glad I did for this!

So I got out to where the Meekers leave for Bagkhangai and I had no such luck Iike I had in previous meeker trips. I was the first to arrive and waited an hour and a half before anyone else started to pile in. Without movement my feet were getting pretty damn cold. Then we loaded the van up with drunken men who thought a tall white guy would be something fun to poke and blather at and three more screaming babies. Are we exporting kids from UB or something?

The standard two hour stress test followed and while the ride was certainly uncomfortable I was amazed at how much I seemed to be enjoying it as it was a reminder of where and what I was heading back to. After a rather bumpy and painful ride we pulled back into my town. AHHH….

Well now I find myself back where I was a week before. Happy but rather bored, all the delguurs are closed as they don’t resupply until the start of next month so I am fighting the urge to just start eating peanut butter right out of the jar….i am better without than with that’s for damn sure.

This will be a brief blog archive though because in a couple weeks time I will go back to UB for another soirée as there are some birthdays but also that I figure I may not get to go to UB in the month of April at any other time. With the melting snow, the ability to go outside and just flat out being busy teaching I may forgoe a mid April resupply. Havent decided yet…maybe im just spoiling myself more than usual these days.

Got a few books to read…nite all!

March 26, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “I talk and they laugh at me, so I get angry and they laugh more…” –That was me describing to a scout leader from UB how the community and I get along.

Today a scout leader from UB (their office is next to PC’s in UB) to describe the history of scouts to the kids in our community interested in joining. It went well, and it was great how I could even remember and understand a lot of what he said and what was written. Tripp was their as well and we had both been Cub Scouts stateside (he bailed at cub, I stuck around till 2nd class boy scouts) here most scouts begin in their early teen years and continue until they are 25 so its much different. Still, something to take up some time during the day.

Warm enough outside to melt a little snow, but the ground is not absorbing it so it just freezes into black ice, not giving me the chance to run and then I cant just lounge outside because the wind is doing a real number. Were getting close though, I can feel it. Next week I plan to run all seven days, maybe even tomorrow if the wind dies down.

Interesting side note. Back in UB me and a few fellow volunteers were watching a few episodes of Big Love that somebody had from HBO. It’s a fictional story about a polygamist family living near mormons incognito and all that. As ive mentioned before Mormons are the most common Caucasians living in Mongolia next to Peace Corps volunteers, but as I was watching something came to mind that brought me up short. We have PCV’s who don’t drink, or at least only drink beer, and yes the taunts and jeers from hardcore Mongolians is annoying but theres plenty of coffees and milk teas to at least demonstrate willingness to interact and socialize with Mongolians. Then I thought of Mormons. They don’t drink any alcohol, don’t have any caffeine so all soda and coffee is out, and they wont drink tea so that knocks off “soutatsae” milk tea and the dark tea drank during the winter. We don’t have very good or very cheap juice, and the only people who actually drink water in this country are PCV’s so I just got to wonder….how the hay do Mormons keep on their feet in this country outside of UB, let alone relate to Mongolians when they pretty much cant drink anything made by Mongolians to drink?

Ill have to ask one the next time I come across one. Crazier things have happened though. I heard of a PCV who not only was a vegetarian but also had a milk lactose intolerance and they survived… I myself intend to find a way to survive without meat once my Peace Corps service ends as well.

March 27, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “Clowns get hit with pies…” –Nicolas Cage

I woke up last night around 2am rather sick. My throat began to hurt and couldn’t really find a good reason for it. I just drank a lot of water and tried to get comfortable to no real success. Don’t feel sick at least so I just need to keep an eye on it.

The sun was out and the temperature at mid day was probably above 40 degrees. It was so bloody refreshing I just couldn’t stand it. I slipped on my running shoes and went out jogging. It was perilous to say nothing else. The melting snow is becoming slush and ice, and I had a few close calls today. The good news is that I have a sneaky suspicion that the next few days will be more of the same. The sun will be out and the wind will be light enough to keep melting more of the ice buildup on the roads. I am going to try and run every day this week. Difficult or not I do need to be sure that I can finish that marathon in June in UB. The price of the ultramarathon up at the Lake may be the dealbreaker for that. I will probably just show up and see if I can register that way and if not ill hitch on to a group horseback riding around the lake. Ill find a way to make that trip nice one way or another, and then in September that one down in the Gobi desert.

Today the warm weather meant the last straw in regards to my winterized apartment. I am sure that the temp especially at night will continue to drop well below freezing but I miss my balcony too much. I broke out my pocket knife (well done Eric for making me pack that!) and just chewed away at the foam and newspaper that had been lodged into my windowsill. It took a lot less effort than I anticipated. Twenty minutes or so later and I pulled the outer and inner window layers open and was greeted by a whosh of semi cold air that aerated my apartment for the first time in over five months. My hammock looked to be doing its same thing and as I lay back in it I reminded myself how good of an idea it had been to bring that with me in Peace Corps service. Its still too cold to sit outside for a prolonged time, but given where I was a month ago I can tell little by little that the Spring is moving in and Summer is just a little behind that.

Life is good.

March 28, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “I will not kill my sister…I will not kill my sister…” –Dexter Morgan

Another day with the temperature above freezing. Little by little the snow outside is melting away from the roads and the ground. Out in the distance I can see brown on the distant hills and everyone is outside and you can see their faces because they only need to wear one coat in the 40 degree weather. The wind was also gone today (HUGE!!!) so I went out for another run.

Had a great cultural moment on the way back. As I wrapped up my run 2 pre-teens were walking back over the hill and one seemed to be walking funny. I slowed until they caught up with me and I recognized the two kids. They were both in my classes. Neithers families are farmers or herders, they work in the government center their families do. Yet one of the kids had a newborn goat zipped into his jacket, making a bleating noise over and over again. It was so cute despite still being wet from the process of birth. He sat tucked into the boys jacket who what I gathered was bring the goat to the family the herd belonged to. I would get that herders and their kids would know how to handle newborn goats without difficulty, and I even have cousins who work farms in America where a newborn still wet from the birthing process would not cause them to bat an eye or flinch, but these kids, who personally own no livestock had no qualms whatsoever with just scooping up a newborn goat and taking it back into town until its legs started working better. Just another fun culture moment I suppose, and I sure hope he washed his coat after!

After my run it was 11am and as I returned home some of the groundskeepers of my school invited me over for vodka. I have proven my willingness to integrate in any way that I can, but good gods vodka at 11am!?!?!?! Its not even a bloody holiday! I tried to explain that I don’t drink until after 5pm (and usually beer or wine but that I kept to myself) and I think they didn’t understand me because they just took off with a gruff. I know I understood what he was saying and I know what I said made sense, so he either simply didn’t understand my accent and gave up, or he is disgusted with me for not willing to start drinking at 11am with vodka…this is a great example of where I think you pay the price for your wish not to drink in this culture at the cost of not making it to social events. Now in all likelihood those guys were some of the more serious drinkers in my town and not getting into it with them may be for the best…but you get my point.

After Tsagen Tsar I really have lost all interest in drinking vodka ever again, and while I expect I will still drink it as the need arises I am under the impression that the warmer months actually means a great deal less drinking of vodka by Mongolians in exchange for lighter alcoholic drinks, which I most certainly get on board with.

Postscript: I just saw something really awful from my balcony. I will tell you about it tomorrow.

March 29, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of miles: 3

Today’s Quote: “The lessons that we never forget are often the ones we wish above all others that we could.” –Someone smarter than they act said that.

First and for the record. What I am putting down in this blog is NOT common in Mongolia. And by that I mean that statistically I don’t believe Mongolia is any worse off about this trait than America is, but that to me doesn’t make it a good thing…just something I wish wasent in either place.

Last night it was 35 degrees outside. How do I describe this in a way that makes you realize how warm that is for me? The snow had been melting all day long and the snow disappears more and more with each passing day and the brown ground beneath never looked more georgous. With my balcony reopened from my work disbanding the winterization I had taken the liberty that afternoon of buying a few Sappos (the Mongolian equivilant of a bad Corona and sat back on my hammock for the first time in months. A comfortable seat never felt so good. The wind was light, I was in a short sleeve shirt and was mildly buzzed on bad beer.

Then I watched from my balcony something pretty damn bad. It was a spousal abuse in motion. Usually beatings between husbands and wives takes place behind closed doors and I didn’t recognize the man but he was obviously in a drunken rage and his wife who was trying to coax him back into their apartment started to take a swing at him. He was drunk and she was nimble but even five floors up I could hear this beating take place. All happening in the courtyard of my apartment building.

As a full grown man and raised in a certain culture this sickened me, but what made it worse was what I did next…nothing. I bit my tongue not to shout at him to stop. The results would not have been fruitful no matter how it worked. He would have either ignored me, hit her harder, or raced up the stairs to attack me himself. If I had physically intervened I would be instantly found guilty of attacking a Mongolian citizen (as a foreigner the details would mean absolutely nothing) and the man even drunk would probably have overpowered me anyway because while I am willing to fight back my desire not to hurt someone is a trait I doubt I would have found in the man beating his wife. I could call the police, and in the end I called my counterpart to ask her if she would, but the response was what I thought it would be. She wasent being beaten to death and the drunken man was not armed, this was a domestic problem and needed to be handled as such. In Mongolia there is a saying “don’t bring your donkey between a man and a woman” In essence meaning that if its not about you, stay the hell out of it.

There are reasons given as to how this is not total abandonment. In this country I have noticed that a woman truly does have total control over who is and who is not allowed to stay in the house at night, and many a night I have seen intoxicated men who have been thrown out of their house to wander aimlessly by their wives for having one too many. Also like I said the woman was not being pummeled nor was the man using a weapon which based on the inquiries made when I txtd made this sound that if this indeed got any worse they would indeed intervene. Women subject to abuse are also capable of taking her kids and moving to her friends houses where her friends and neighbors upon being brought into the situation by one of the two involved are then viewed as allowed to act upon putting an end to this.

Its not an excuse, and doing what I did disgusted me no less. As a full grown man and fully capable of doing something that would at least immediately stop this drunken man, did absolutely nothing…

There are sociology cases where people in large crowds absolved themselves of blame for a crime like pillaging or murder as they blamed the crowd and not themselves. There is no such feeling for me. Watched by over a dozen out of our windows I and my community did nothing while we watched this…and I do feel disgusted by that.

It even gets worse. The five year old daughter of the two of them watching from five feet away was shouting at her dad to stop. When the wife ran inside the man turned his attention to the girl and started shuffling back and forth towards her. The girl ran away, and the father either drunk or unwilling to run just kept walking behind her as the little girl kept 20 yards from him. She kept running all the way away from the apartments and kept running into the countryside, the father slowly in pursuit shouting at her to stop. She kept running, and did so until they were out of my eyesight. That type of response by the kid leads me to believe that she was accustomed to her fathers behavior and how to counter it….

I think what made this so disturbing to watch was how long it went on. I just watched the kid run further and further out into the countryside. Turning every 15 yards to see if her father had given up wobbly chasing after her before turning to run a little bit more and repeat. The length of time this went on gave this a sense of realism. The idea that most people not personally involved in domestic violence see the quick flash of disturbance. The angry husband and wife shout two things at each other before they slam the door and the conversation and interaction becomes private. There was no such barrier in this circumstance, and for ten minutes I watched something helpless to stop it effectively and unable to walk away without thinking about it, so helpless to change their personalities I just watched. I don’t know what my take on god is, but if there is one, and the idea that god is responsible for the free will of mankind then I think I get the idea of why Arkadi and Boris Strugatski wrote a book called “Hard to be a God”

This is not a happy blog. I don’t have a happy ending to this or a moral. That’s what I think I am learning a lot about in Peace Corps. I am little by little coming to the sad horrible and unavoidable truth that not every wrong has a right, or at least not a permanent right. You can do everything possible, try to lead by example, and in the end so very very many things in this world are just gonna be so messed up. I guess you just have to hope that even when you realize this that your still willing to do everything you can at all times…

In every outcome of that story, whether I had intervened or not would have still led to it all being unbalanced. Lets say somehow, that I had calmed the man down in some way. His wife and child, sitting on a time bomb are going to be in that same situation again and I wont be there that time. And he had parents and teachers who should and for all I know did tell him that doing that was wrong…so why me? So why not me? Why is it so hard to find just one possible solution to the endless number of difficulties I see in day to day life. Its psychologically exhausting to realize that your best just wont due…

I talked to my counterpart about it the next day. She didn’t know the couple either….maybe it was just a bad dream from the bad Mongolian Coronas…I doubt it.

March 30, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “As a teacher I know that’s not true.” –A teacher was once told that respect had to be earned, that was their response.

I don’t know what the heck is going on. Maybe its near the end of the month so money is tight, maybe there is something in the air. But after seeing that domestic fight the day before suddenly I am noticing a lot of fighting going on around my apartment. A husband and wife were screaming (literally the first time ive heard a Mongolian scream) at each other in the hallway of our apartment block this afternoon and the wife threw the husband out. Geeze…

For the record: To my future wife, if I ever get violent you take a pillow and just wait till I fall asleep. There are a lot of terrible ways to turn out, someone who abuses their spouse is pretty damn high up on my list…anyway…

The cold and wind is in high gear today, and if the forecast is accurate it will be for the next few days. This break of mine was botched big time. I was too invested in going with others out west that when everybody pulled out I chose not to do it alone. It’s a reasonable excuse, and given the weather I may or may not have done myself a favor, but I instead spent the time eating insane amounts of food, gaining some weight because I still cannot run long periods of time and basically waiting to start teaching again. Wasted two weeks. Next year ill use these two weeks and go to China or something. I think my goal of limiting my stimulation is failing. Given I am two months away from no plumbing or a television with three really crummy channels either it may be time to reevaluate.

Crummy day outside. Not one of the 300 sunny days we have here in Mongolia. Today at the school all the teachers showed up (they get paid if they do despite the fact we don’t have kids) and they were all thrilled that a grant had gotten them modern cooking appliances for the canteen. The amount of stuff they were given is literally larger than the kitchen itself. They even got a buffet salad bar. I nearly wet myself thinking about the concept of a Mongolian salad bar…anyway, so my time at school was hardly required.

I am concerned about the weather. If I don’t start getting some longer distance runs in the next two weeks theres no way I can stack them up to 20 miles by May 1st. (then you taper off little by little till the Marathon on June 5th) and if I don’t build up my legs I am going to have to walk a large chunk of that upcoming marathon. I want to exercise. I want to be gasping for breath and legs that collapse when I try to bend them so badly. I want the cracked skin and the desire both to pee and throw up at the same time so badly….but this bloody 30 degrees outside with 20mph winds and ice on the main road!!! Not cold anymore but too damn cold and windy to exercise. Blasted…

So I caught an email from my mom today. Apparently she is headed to North Carolina this weekend with my sister. Wow, cant recall the last time my mom headed south without leaving for Aruba! Well that means that with her computer the prospect of Skype is not out of the question with my Grandparents…and while I would like to run more than anything else right now I will say that seeing my grandma and granddad on the computer screen and saying hi would truly make my day…and I imagine theirs as well.

So…having left behind UB a week ago I imagine I will be heading back again this weekend. As a man who had definitely had enough of UB by the time I left last week I did not plan on returning so soon, but for this very rare circumstance I will make a rare exception…of course a fellow PCV is celebrating their birthday next weekend and ill probably drop in for that as well and ….ah blasted….alright school will help get me back on track.

For all my whining about not being able to run I am pleased to report that the snow is still trickling off little by little. When you have seen the ground as a sheet of white for five months anything brown looks beautiful at that point. Common weather…let me run more…longer…farther! It’s the first ever International Mongolia Marathon! I want to at least jog across the finish line!

March 31, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “If that’s a crime then lock me up…” –Creed

Today at school we did the same thing we have done the past three days. Sat in the computer lab playing spider solitare (they don’t like video games apparently) and trading off using the internet. I got to use it yesterday at its awesome speed of a kilobyte per second of bandwidth. I took a quick look over at CNN and FOXNEWS…you gotta listen to the news…even the propoganda, because you gotta know what there saying so you know what those that listen to the propoganda think…see? Didn’t think about that huh? Every time I turn on the news after being out of the loop for a few weeks or so something else has come up I wouldn’t expect. Ricky Martin’s gay…not that that’s surprising just amusing that news like that would be higher up on the list than the Moscow subway bombings. I also found out they may be making sequels to Independence Day…do you realize that that movie is over 14 years old? Granted I was that age when it came out but G.M. Chrysler im old!

Luckily, blogs take up little space and I was able to look back on a year of blogging because I had guessed correctly. Last year on this date something pretty damn legendary happened.

I knew it was en route because I had gotten a call from someone at Peace Corps asking me if I was still a lockdown for the launch date and all that but that still doesn’t mean I wasn’t excited. I got the Peace Corps package and I knew exactly what it was. I was even pretty sure at this point where I was going but based on the number of blogs I had read at that point I was not willing to be sure of anything. I took the package from the mail room at Fordham University and I went over to Edwards Parade Lawn. I sat on a bench. If I recall the day was not especially pretty, but the students were all shuffling about to classes and I sat in my black trenchcoat and my black tie/shirt combo that I wore as part of my formal process at the school. I opened the package and that thick blue folder was in my hands. I was invited to serve the Peace Corps…in Mongolia. That blue folder I still have with me, and I will say for all ive bumped around that sucker has remained pretty sturdy. Good for it.

Ive read many a blog entries and heard many a reaction to getting their invitation letters. Some rip the package from the mailman’s hand and go screaming thrilled to no end back into their house to tell their friend and parents the good news. Some just come up short and wonder why they didn’t get placed somewhere else. Some probably even read that, scratched their head and went “Mon..gol..lee..yah………is that next to Moldova?”

For me, I just sat there. Quiet and collected on that bench reading the same lines over and over again about both the country I was invited to and also the type of work I would be doing. There was a lot of emotions to take in. I had originally been cleared to enter Peace Corps service in 2007. I had been given a career and educational opportunity at Fordham University that would not be as easily found when I returned from service so I put it off...and in 2007 I had a nagging suspicion that that was the first way that a long term goal I had had of joining the Peace Corps may not come to fruition. I spent two amazing years working at Fordham University. I learned new administrative and leadership skills, continued on as a life long learner with another Masters Degree, and probably most of all I matured some. Not completely, but enough to make this experience far more enjoyable. Had Peace Corps not been for me, I could have easily found another excuse to put off Peace Corps…maybe until I got promoted to Area Coordinator, maybe when I finish that doctorate, the school is subsidizing my classwork at an amazing school after all. Yet I remember the knowledge that I was 28 and had wanted to join since I first heard about the Peace Corps specifically when I was 20…that’s a bit too long to keep someone like me bottled up. That’s how you know when Peace Corps is right for you btw. When you have a million good reasons not to, or at least a few other thing you could just as easily do instead of serve…and then you apply anyway. THAT’S how you know…least my opinion.

As I sat there holding that package last year today, I needed a minute to just realize that while I in many ways contain faults I wish I didn’t have. That I was secretly arrogant in some ways and a pain in the ass to others… with that packet in my hand and a feeling of desire to join the service so I could help and teach others like I never had before…I realized that one of my greatest fears was not true. I am not full of shit. I am not all talk. My liberal lifestyle and viewpoints on the human comedy were not a grandstanders jeer. I really did want to help…and I really was going to.

Of course, getting that invite just set off a brand new process of gathering paperwork and signing specific forms for visas, my bank account information and various other things I needed to compose for Peace Corps Service. Also the following month I was presenting my Masters Thesis, getting my Teachers Certification in Virginia after the most trying two or so years of my life and managing a building of 250 Freshmen whose viewpoint on alcohol was getting worse and worse and so my euphoria about what was going to happen in 2 months got put on pause until about Mid May. Still to those reading this who got their letters around this time I tell you regardless of how you reacted. Whether your blindsided by Mongolia or like me your recruiter seemed to think this place was perfect for you from the moment you started your application process I promise you that us Peace Corps Mongolia Volunteers are the real deal.

We wear our service like a badge of honor and if your hearts in this whether you’re a vegetarian wine drinking beach loving tall white guy like myself going to a meat infested vodka swigging landlocked country of people about 5’5 I promise you to a moral certainty that there is no greater nation in the world to serve as a Peace Corps volunteer and you will have the absolute time of your life.

About eight or nine weeks until the M’21’s arrive….ill wave at you all when you show up. Look for the guy with the sign that says “Be intimidated!!! I was!!!” Funny how a year can look in perspective…

Now on to some logistical nonsense. I woke up today to the harshest wind I have heard and felt in the time ive been in Mongolia. It even blew in the windows to some of the apartment stairwell. It also brought a fresh blanket of snow, killing my chances of running for the immediate future….buzz kill! With that in mind and the prospect of saying hi to my grandparents on Skype I have decided to head back to UB again tomorrow. I may even cut this hair of mine as well. Would be a good way to start off the 4th quarter I suppose.

April 2, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Ein Pizzarae!” (That’s me today accidently using German, English and Mongolian in the same sentence to order a pizza)

I think I am getting the hang of UB. Yes it’s a tad more luxurious than I would like, but given that I plan to spend pretty much all of April and May at my site running (sky father willing) I will allow it to happen. So I got in and tomorrow I wake up at six in the fracking morning to Skype with my grandparents and Jacobs family members. I have spent my time eating pizza as always but the hostel has been particularly crowded with German and Austrian travelers. VERY cool. The current ones are only 20 years old. I thought back to what I was like at age 20….good gods I wouldn’t have lasted five minutes let alone there women. Not saying women are weak, quite the opposite, but of those preyed on by thiefs and robbers it’s the fairer sex that gets the attention. I think ill take the German ladies ive met out to Greater Mongolia to hear Ultan Urag if there interested. I like that band, and the beer rocks too…its sorta amusing that beer seven months ago was so lousy…and now having drank pretty much all the different types of beers Mongolia has to offer I will say that stuff is like liquid Ambrosia. Seriously if I drank an Augustiner I would hit nirvana.

So now I find myself VERY slowly downloading a movie from Itunes called “The New World” Its perhaps the most boring movie on the planet and as a result is probably the most accurate movie about the experience of the settlers of Jamestown out there. Yup…life is quite good. Maybe this afternoon ill do something crazy like take a nap followed by a rigorous round of book reading, might kick it into overdrive and even write in the diary I keep that I seldom use based on how often and accurate I keep my blog.

April 5, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4ish

Today’s Quote: “I know your not gonna believe this, but theres was nothing left after I sheared him. He was just hair and sneakers!” –Porky Pig in his role as assistant to Duck Dodgers when he saved Dodgers from the Orange furred monster that Marvin the Martian had as a pet….i cant memorize the periodic table but I can describe in detail every single cartoon I have ever watched…go figure

Lot going on so lets get this blog started in here. The rest of my time in UB went well again. Met some Germans only 20 years old out for some culture before their University started. Good Gods I remember what I was like when I was 20…wouldn’t have lasted five minutes, and there girls too! Not to be sexist though, just that women travelers are targeted for looting and violence far more than men.

The skype to the Jacobs side of the family went great. In order to sync up times I had to get on skype at 6:30am in the morning (6:30pm there time) That might have been bad enough, but then I also had taken the Germans out for some drinking the night before and though not hungover I definitely had a voice about ten times deeper than I usually sound. Still, it was a great kick to see my Grandma and Grandad live. They looked like they were doing great. It was amusing for me that everyone was drinking wine while talking to me on Skype. Cruel punishment! Nah but seriously it was all good.

So I stuck around until Sunday for some fun. We got in the meeker that they stuffed to the rafters and headed out. Unlike my previous trips no babies this time, only old people. I like them though. Youd think that like in America some of the more nationalistic or xenophobic would be those not as accustomed to seeing Americans outside of television like the elderly, but luckily the goal of the Peace Corps seems to be doing well because everyone just points at me and says in Monoglian “He looks just like Lief!” You know how Westerners are considered racist when they believe all Asians look alike? Well I am pleased to report that to Asians all Westerners look the same as well. Everyones racist! Don’t you all feel better now? Collective guilt. The glue of society and what makes the world go round…wow that was a little too dark coming from a liberal. Now in all fairness me and the teacher from three years ago do indeed look the same in some ways, but no they even think me and Tripp look a lot alike which we do not.

We got back to site and I realized that I forgot to get my haircut. This morning I woke up and decided enough was enough. Time to cut this stuff. My hair was cut by one of the groundskeepers of my school. He sat me down and wearing my formal polo and no cloth over me just literally starts shearing into my hair. So with my thin and thick globs of foot long hair pouring onto my clothes the teachers and stare and mock. I have long hair, they laugh and say im ugly. I get a haircut and they laugh…cant win. On the upside I am now 50 pounds lighter and my ears are cold for the first time ever as my hair no longer covers them. How about that? But the hair is now much more appropriate for running too which I plan to do some of this afternoon because classes it turn out don’t begin until tomorrow. Well that’s fine with me.

Last piece of news. Oddly I had predicted this was going to happen from the very beginning. No idea why I was so certain I just was, but I didn’t get a job as a trainer this summer. Some of my friends had found out if they were or weren’t working this summer by email and having not gotten one I gave PC office a call. A one minute phone call and an apology for having forgotten to send me an email I was told I didn’t get the job.

Those that know me can vouch I don’t handle failures well. I am not a good sport despite the best efforts of my parents to beat it into me and enough failures in my life had come up in important enough areas that my body made me almost bedridden with fatigue I got at some points. Now I still stress thought that a lesser amount of frustration at failure CAN be a good thing. To at least have some sort of force egging you on to succeed will probably lead you to trying harder than you are used to. But no my previous encounters with failure were unhealthily severe. Yet when I was told I had failed to become a trainer this summer for the first time I can think of I took it well. Really well. Maybe theres hope for me yet….

Or maybe it just made me realize that I can go to all corners of Mongolia over the summer and spend some time informally helping those at my site. So I will shell out the cash and go horseback riding around Hovsgul Lake. Go see Eaglefestival out in the West, and even go east and…well im sure ill think of something. Ill save my trip to the Gobi for when I run the Gobi desert marathon in September. Who has a cooler life than me?

Additionally as not an official trainer I can now give the advice that PCV’s give to trainees that is not covered in classroom exercises. The real low-down so to speak. So pat me on the back. I failed at something and for the first time ever its not the end of the world. Good for me.

But I am still so gonna cheer the noobs on when they show up at the airport.

April 6, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 5

Today’s Theme Song: “My Happy Ending” By Avril Lavign

The trick to being a good runner is learning how to get over putting on your shoes. You heard right. Basically once you get into good enough shape to run 3 or more miles at a jog without stopping the physical act of running is in fact a very pleasant experience. Fresh air, endorphins, your doing something that you know is good for your body, knowledge that youll sleep like a log that evening. Yea, a runners high does exist. It just takes six or so months of running 5 times a week 3 or more miles to find it.

So with all that good feeling you may ask why I don’t always get around to running? Well the weather was a pain in the ass for the last 5 months this much is true, another problem is getting to that first step. You see, after teaching in a foreign language for the majority of the day, putting up with my counterparts sarcasm/insults and all around fatigue from a day of pshychologically draining work, getting into the mood for running is hard to do. So…you gotta trick yourself, or rather that’s what I do anyway. Basically when I get back to my room I do what all bachelors do. I throw my bag into the corner, hang up my jacket and proceede to get out of all my formal clothing and start to walk around my room in my boxers.

The next five minutes are critical, for I have to choose between my pajama pants and spending the afternoon lounging around or lying on my hammock until sunset, or I can put on my sweatpants and running shirt and go right outside. So in those five minutes I run to the bathroom, drink a liter of water, and eat a piece of Peanut Butter bread. If done effectively, I put on my running clothes and get my body moving. Ten minutes later I am thanking myself and so goes another day of preparing for the UB Marathon 2 months away. Ah, life is good.

Well, that was an interesting day today. A few bits to cover. First I showed back up to teach for the first time in over two weeks. I should have recalled how the first week of each quarter has always started. The kids are busy gossiping and the teachers who all took their vacations to heart give the kids a mundane writing assignment so they can create assignments to use in future weeks (do I sound bitter? The scarier thing is that’s not with an ounce of sarcasm. I wrote that as though I were copying a Chinese Food menu…mmmm…Chinese Food….)

Well I was also told that my Training Manager (the guy whose my neighbor) has been dismissed from his post...again. Oddly enough, this is the exact same time this happened to him last year and for exactly the same reason. I didn’t mention the reason before and im not going to now….its just something ill write in my diary and not this blog and ill let you all imagine, I assure you the real reason will blow yours out of the water. Anyways the person now working his job was rather remarkable if you ask me. It’s the 27 year old Mathematics teacher of our school named Sukbold. He was the guy who tutored me last year in Mongolian, and hes a hard worker and great guy. Hes also they youngest teacher in our school and somehow he was the one selected for the job. This dismissal and replacement is complicated and delicate to talk about so I learn what I do from hearsay but no women were considered for the job and the male teacher they picked was the youngest in the school. I believe what I am looking at is a true meritocracy. You go Mongolia! Make Temujin proud!

So todays school reminded me that the reentry into active student teaching will be gradual, but I made some accomplishments. Though we didn’t enroll in English Olympics those students interested were able to get a copy of the test given this year and they asked me for advice on how to take it so I helped them out.

Peace Corps also showed up today to have tryouts for the various teachers interested in being the Peace Corps Mongolian teachers for this summer both here in Ondortolge and in Bagkhangai. Curious and with little else to do I stuck around to listen to them talk about how their sample lessons went. As an unbiased observer I was amazed how little cutthroat of drive this position brought. I figured theyd undermine one another left and right to get the job. Instead they gave each other advice on their lessons and everything! Go figure…

April 7, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 3

Today’s Quote: “You shall not pass! The Force is with me and my Kung Fu is strong!” –The ultimate superhero.

Long Wednesdays. Were back into the old posture of some days of the week lasting forever while at the end of the week you look back and have no idea where the time went. Today was I think the greatest example of team teaching I have ever done with my counterpart though, was thrilled about that.

Seven more weeks of long Wednesdays, then the summer arrives. Everyday a little warmer, a little less snow. Its quite revolting to see just how many animals have frozen to death and been out by the roads up until now. Hard to miss now that the weather has been above freezing for the past week during the daytime. Nightime is still a bit cold out.

Someone in class with one of their cell phones said that its gonna be back to -20 Celcius and a snowstorm tomorrow. Weather…especially the winds but the snow too…you gotta stop this. I haven’t run longer than 12 miles without stopping in over six months and I got two months to get back into that. I needed this weekend for that. Seriously, you had your fun..lemme have a semblence of a Spring. Its like 70F in Washington DC these days…buggers.

April 8, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Theme Song: “Hands Clean” by Alanis Morisette

What the heck was the matter with my counterpart today? Everything I did and said seemed to make her angry. Cant see what, I ran both classes today, I kept the kids in order, I even invited her over to hang out with me and Tripp tonight and she gave me no more attention than some annoying accessory she kept having to ignore. What the heck?

Ill be honest next year is looking more and more promising. I could easily have worked here another year at this specific school but a chance at a more outgoing and less insulting counterpart really wouldn’t hurt. I cant tell if its me specifically or if this is the way she always acts around Peace Corps volunteers. Maybe it really is just me, but in seven more weeks I will be happy to try something else. In the meanwhile seven weeks will be a blink, especially now that I can go outside and whatnot.

Actually today I couldn’t go outside that much. It didn’t snow and it stayed quite sunny but the wind was powerful. It was tough to walk so running was probably out as well. No matter, today can be the rest day and tomorrow I can run and whatnot. Though there are PC volunteers I would like to see and a package with a new Star Wars book waiting for me in UB I don’t know if I want to go back to UB again. Its so bad that I am literally thinking of going to UB on Saturday, grabbing the package and then going straight back to Naarantul and back to my town without even spending the night. That would cost 10000 tugriks. 6000 round trip from my site and 4000 round trip by cab to the PC office. About 6 bucks, and a little under two days pay….wow I really must like these Star Wars books. Though in all fairness I haven’t read a new one in the series since last September. 8-9 months…eep. I choose a book series to read in Mongolia well though.

Well I haven’t really drank vodka in a couple months, but tonight me and my sitemate might break it out again. Cheaper than beer and to be honest its been a while since we hung out. Off to have some fun. Hope everyones life is going along a little more interesting than mine.

April 9, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 14

Today’s Quote: “Never Spit Into the Wind” –This was a tip given at the start of Warcraft II games. Its amusing that this is the only country I can think of where the wind is actually strong enough.

Gods I love running. Theres something so liberating at being able to make you body function for so long a period of time. I woke up this morning having spent the last night downing a bottle of mid class vodka. It was the first vodka id drank in over a month and as ive mentioned before my tolerance to vodka is finiky. Some nights a shot will knock me unconscious and other times I can drink the bottle and barely feel the buzz. Well last night I drank the thing and came out feeling fine. Hadnt really eaten in the past 10 hours either. How the hell does my body work?

So I woke up right as rain and went to school. My counterpart blew off today so I taught classes….Seven weeks to go. Afterwards around noon I headed back to my room. It was a balmy 30 degrees outside and the wind was strong enough to almost make me lose my jacket. Not ideal running weather obviously. No choice though, tomorrow I need to go grab that package in UB and I needed a long run….like today! So I put on the clothes and with a wind strong enough to knock me off my feet I headed outside. It felt amazing to run for so long. An hour out and an hour ten minutes back. I spent the first hour running directly into the wind. That hurt. I brought a Cliff bar that my Aunt had shipped me (Aunt Susie you so rock) and a tiny water bottle that I needed to hold in my hand because if I didn’t the water iced up. With the wind at my back most of the way home I got the whole run in. The meekers that run between our two towns keep stopping to offer me a ride. Mongolians are not real “runners” I suppose. Must be because of all the horses…

Over two hours of running without stopping after six months unable to run more than twice a week for a half hour and I did so after drinking a bottle of vodka last night….hey look everyone! I get cake, and I get to eat it too….and then theres more cake! Lifes not fair in a lot of ways, but every now and then you win the lottery and life is not fair to your advantage.

Well that run was encouraging. A half marathon. If I can run for two hours without stopping especially into a gale force wind for an hour of it then i can likely build that up even more in the coming weeks. In a couple weeks ill bank up to 20 miles and after that I can begin to taper back to 7-9 miles on weekends and faster 3-5 mile runs during the week. And if all goes well I show up and finish the first ever UB Marathon. I do hope some other PCV’s decide to run this race.

April 10, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Today’s Quote: “No you get to live and experience all the joys of male adulthood. Acne…Shaving…Premature Ejaculation. Its all yours kid.” –Arnold Schwarzenegger

Today I did a UB run. Literally I got up this morning and loaded into the meeker. I went straight from the black market meeker dropoff and headed to Peace Corps office. There was a package waiting for me there. Big props to the M18 Greg for the heads up about that. Had I not heard I wouldn’t have come to UB for another month. Yes the goodies inside packages are always nice, but there was a Star Wars book with my name on it. After that I had an hour or so before the Meeker headed back to my town. Out and back. That doesn’t count as a UB trip right?

With that hour to spare I walked over to a store in UB called Sky Video. Its practically the only legit DVD store in this country outside the State Department. I looked at the titles and settled on a two pack of Saw IV and Saw VI. I just finished watching them this evening. Im not so much into these movies for the gore and carnage, but rather the psychology behind them. The whole will to survive thing. I think that’s why Saw IV was by far my favorite of the Saw Movies. The mentality of it and the plot twist was rather impressive, even for a Saw movie. Also the first trap of the movie, where one man is blind and one cant talk and they are chained to one another with the key on the blind man and the mentality that because they didn’t trust one another they couldn’t both survive. So I was glad I got that.

Since Saw VI came out last October I hadn’t seen that, but I will say that I was not as impressed with this movie. Actually I really didn’t like it. In every movie of saw before this one, every person put in a jigsaw trap has a chance to survive. Now usually they don’t survive due to their inability to work together or overcome a difficulty they have, but before Saw VI everyone had a chance to survive from a jigsaw trap. It’s the mentality of Jigsaw that he wants people to survive, for in surviving they also become rehabilitated from their addictions instantly. They even covered this in Saw III with Amanda making traps you couldn’t escape.

In Saw VI though, its pretty much just a vendetta. In every trap somebody has to die, and though I get it that the mentality is that Jigsaw is getting his revenge on the people who have killed others, traps in which someone must die are in complete contrast to the message in the previous five movies. The ending of Saw VI was the only thing that saved the movie for me. Jigsaws apprentice making it out of his trap (very cleverly too) means that the next one will be interesting with the whole 2 remaining apprentices and all that. Naturally were all waiting for Dr. Gordon to show up, which I really doubt will happen but hey…another Halloween, another Saw movie. I think they got 2 movies left in em…which may mean I even get to see the last one in the movie theatres back in America…lucky me.

Back to the package. I will say this about the packages I get from home…the personality of the person sending me things is directly related to what kind of things I get in my packages. For example, when I ask my mom for Peanut Butter and Star Wars books in my package I get these things, but then she also sends Grape Jelly and Nutella as well as various dried fruits, ponytail holders for my hair (which ive cut but heck…I got over a year of service left to go) and tuna fish packets. In essence its full of tiny little knick knacks and cute little things that are so like my sweet mothers personality. My Dad sent me a package and with it something was sent by each member of the Jacobs side of the family that again is very like my dad. Especially the tomato seeds and growing kit. My stepfather meanwhile. I ask him for Peanut Butter and books….and he sent me EXACTLY that. Peanut Butter and books. Im not ripping any package format I just find it amusing how I could tell you who sent me something based solely on the contents and my knowledge of their personalities. Fun fun…

April 11, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Aye me lads! Weve got enough gold to choke a whale!” –Pirate for rich.

Snow….its snowed last night. Its 75 degrees in Washington DC last week when I talked to my family and here I am almost at the middle of April and it snows! You know some of us are trying to RUN around here!!!! Ah blasted. Well that’s no good. Though the temp is only around 20F here so the snow is not the bone dry scratchy stuff that was falling in February….but common!!! Ugh. I called up my sitemate Tripp and asked if this happened last year. Even he is floored by the type of weather we have been having. Tough Zudd! When running a few days back I was amazed at how many dead cows and goats were just lying around along the countryside. The cold and the lack of grass just wears the animals down. More amazing is that this isint even where Mongolia is being hit hard either. I can only imagine just how bad it must be in Aimags like Gobi-Altai up in the mountains that have been in the negative Fahrenheit temps since November and still are!

Well in typical style I took the Star Wars book “Backlash” and in a days time read the whole thing. I think I learned how to do this when I worked at the 10th hole snack shop at a country club one summer. The idea of excessive amounts of spare time coupled with mildly interesting books (Red Storm Rising was the popular book that summer for me, and other Clancy stuff) My opinion about Backlash? Eh…not bad not good. For me the problem is that my favorite character is long dead and demonized. Technically this part of the series is the characters trying to find out why my character went bad but in essence they have moved on from him pretty much, so I am disappointed before I even read em. Wow, mom’s right. I am a harsh critic! All in all it’s a fine read I just wish something would happen in these books that I somehow doubt will. Nothing for it, just gotta keep reading or take up knitting.

Oh yea. Today that’s 10 months of time in Mongolia and in Peace Corps service. Wow… When I skyped with my family last week they all asked if I missed anything about life back in America….and I came up short as I really didn’t all that much. But I tried to assure them that this wasent a bad thing. In fact I think the reason people miss something is because they don’t have something at their current place as much as they like. My relationship with my family is strong and solid. No unfinished business, nothing I haven’t told them and I think it’s the same for them about me. Were just all in all okay. I do miss being able to go into lengthy discussions with people about specific things and not my half assed Mongolian which is hard to use to talk in depth.

…that and wine of course, but maybe that and the pretty girls is why I miss Germany a little more than I miss America. No matter, I am fine where I am….if only it would please stop snowing in the middle of bloody April!

April 12, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I don’t believe this im surrounded by assholes!” –Lord Helmet

Snow again today. Common its fracking mid April! It doesn’t need to be warm outside but its fracking snowing. Some of us want to run round here!!! Granted not a whole lot of us but still dammit.

School internet was working today and though there was a long line I stole it for two minutes to check mail and surprisingly got to have a momentary conversation with my mom. She brought something up that I want to comment on though. When I told her I wanted her to consider going to China sometime in March next year during the time I would have two weeks off of school she brought up two things. The first complaint she had was that China would be “Freezing” in March….she is aware that Latitude wise Beijing is further South than New York right? Although for a woman who goes to Bermuda in the Winter months yes I can imagine to her 50 degrees must be freezing. I haven’t experienced 50 degree weather in so so long. I swear when it hits 55 outside I am gonna start sweating again. I should be thankful for the weather though. The summer brings the warmth…and that brings the flies….LOTS and LOTS of flies….nah I still want the warmth.

Moving on from that, she accused me of planning too far ahead and not being here and now. Seeing as four months ago I pledged to myself that I would exactly NOT do that I want to comment. First off, this was all abstract thinking. Nothings planned out and if anything it’s a way for me to amuse myself. Not all of us have internet and the weather still limits how long I can spend outside! I am here and now… the only difficulty with here and now is that in the snowy months the small towns of Mongolia can simply be excruciatingly boring. Lack of internet though doesn’t let me plan stuff out though, and so I feel I can state that I am indeed here and now…I just like the idea of Chinese food….and I imagine that next summer ill have something else to do. A job, another round of service, the desire to travel Trans-Siberian. I haven’t made the plans but I know there eventually exist. No I keep my pledge and ill stay here in the true and utter boredom.

Moogi took my cinnamon. I brought some with me ten months ago and Moogi has this insatiable urge to eat cookies that her and her scouts are making so I just handed it over. That won me a few popularity points. Its amusing to me what makes you popular in Mongolia. Wealth isint all that impressive to Mongolians. Its seems to be how creatively you use your wealth that counts….such as procuring spices. Go figure.

By the by. During the five minutes I had internet today I looked at fellow volunteer blogs and an M19 wrote something that I think explains why a lot more dead animals can be found out in the countryside now. This winter was a bad one, which I for the record believe that means by the odds that my 2nd Mongolian winter will be far milder…always get the hard stuff done first! Yea but they mentioned that after November the temperature in Mongolia never went above freezing at any time. So for over half a year the snow that’s fallen hasent melted, and the ground underneath therefore up until last week was bone dry. The animals need food, and while grass will eventually begin to grow again the animals which have been on starvation rations for so long are simply running out of gas as they don’t have food now either. The endless cold and no food at a time when there should be grass growing would explain a lot.

Its rather amazing how all the M19 blogs I have read are gonna be done with service in three or so months. The color-guard is changing….the noobs become the veterans and another mountain of noobs will take their place. Life goes on…as it never ends.

April 13, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “Reality can be a real bitch.” –Niobe

Good day of running. Stupid wind…it’s a real buzz kill. I remember running back in September on days where there was no wind. It would be shockingly quiet and serene. You have no such luxury in the Spring. Its running into a blasted wind tunnel half the time. Though like I said before the upshot is that when the wind is gone I imagine being able to run quite well because of the tolerance it will help me build. Its like that episode of Samurai Jack where the monkeys tie a huge boulder onto Jacks back so that he learns to “jump good” Whose with me on this one????

Onto Peace Corps work stuff. I found out when graduation is for my students. Your not gonna believe this but the ceremony is at the end of this month about 2 or so weeks away! The reasoning is logical if ridiculous and goes as follows. We have a graduation ceremony for 11th, 10th and 9th graders (the 9th and 10th graders who wont be continuing on and are leaving school to get a job that doesn’t need a college education) on the 30th. We test the students (who will all pass as every student in this country must….you know we rip the American Education system for not teaching kids how to lose well because we fudge numbers to get kids to pass…I have seen how it works in other places now!)

So they take our test and to those brave souls trying to go to University they take the English entrance exams. That test they most certainly can fail, and so Moogi and I have turned our 90% grammar based classes and made them 100% grammar based as this is all the English they are tested on. Id complain but even the internet is probably bored of my arguments against this by now. I still try to speak as much of it as I can to them while we learn it….ill redesign my strategm for next school year. The reason it’s a month before the close of school though is that some of the students truly serious about the University test at that point withdraw from the town and head to UB for more professional English practice. May will be a good month of teaching I think. It will finally be warm enough to go outside and with that I can perform some kinetic English lessons. “I am running! You are running!” So on… Or maybe just anything with warm weather sounds to me like the greatest thing on earth. Who knows.

Not much else to say. Started putting the word out to fellow volunteers not working as trainers this summer of some travel ideas. With as much time as I now have and no intention of taking any days off next year my VERY vague ideas are to UB Marathon in early June, wave to the M21 noobs…spend a few weeks learning how to live in a ger, then in late June go out West. Think of something cool to do, and then be back in Baghkhangai in time for Naadam in Mid July. Then get up to Khovsgul Lake in time for the ultra-marathon in the middle of July, and finally trek around the lake and go see the Reindeer people before heading back to get set for teaching in Bagkhangai. All vague, nothing even researched by internet, and plenty to do before that…but I like to think this is the best ive ever been at failing to get to do something and moving on. Not the greatest failure of my life admittedly but…baby steps. Off to wash off the salt buildup from my run. Cyas!

April 14, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of Miles: 4

Today’s Quote: “Do any of us ever really get what we deserve?” –In Treatment

Its 40 degrees ou

Damn that hair rocks! Kept it short my whole life, now i grow it long in the country where men with long hair is the most unattractive thing on the planet. Go figure....

I love Bonnie in my town. Hes got so much dirt in his hair its almost like dreadlocks.

This dude lives a bit out of town, and drops in with his camels once a month or so to resupply. How utterly cool is that shot? As he passed by he was singing a Mongolian song about the rolling hills and the winter and his mothers tea....culture moment...

Every time i think about how Whole Foods sells "organic" carrots for like five bucks a pound i want to pull my hair out. I find myself peeling carrots that were pulled out of the ground a few hundred yards from where i live. What can i say...things become relative when you join the Peace Corps.

An empty meeker driving to UB. NEVER happens....and then it happens

Caesar and Brutus himself dropped in a cold Janurary night for a hangout. Very honored of course.

The One Laptop Per Child laptops are in the hands of every 4th and 5th grader of my town...Oh hellz yes we can!

This was the kids putting on their performances at the culture center. Doesnt it look shockingly like the end scenes of the Star Wars movies?

Okay, so a Peace Corps Volunteer, a couple Americans, three French girls and a whitty Spaniard go to a bar....there no punch line thats just pretty damn funny.

TSAAGEN TSAR!!! TSAAGEN TSAR!!!!

When your as hot as me, you can make a dell look really good

My birthday party. Not making this up. Its not considered a good wedding or a good birthday until everyone is drunk and at least one fight breaks out.

Me, Tripp and a friend of his

Dont worry, i got the horse by the teeth! Thats my moms house and the guy holding the horse is a tank! He won the town Naadam wrestling tournament.

Thats the outside of my school. You notice that the ice is piled up as high as me, and its the sheer dryness of it that keeps it so stuck to it. Give it another month....maybe itll be gone then, but that ice has been like that since November

March 1, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Today’s Temperature: Around 10 Fahrenheit….and wind and snow!

Today’s Quote: “Tell me your greatest strength so I can undermine you. Tell me you care for most so I can take it away from you. Tell me what you crave so I can deny you and tell me your greatest fear so I can force you to face it.” –Darth Plagieus, Palpatine’s Master

Great quote huh? What can I say…im a sucker for a good quote, even from fictional Sith Lords that don’t even have books written about them…yet…

Got back to my site good and exhausted as I always do. The meeker ride was both lucky and uncomfortable. I took a risk at noon that the first meeker would not have launched yet. I think I am getting more situated to taxis in Mongolia…ie every car on the road. Literally without even making the hand gestures of “are you going to travel?” I went to the first driver stationary on the road I was walking along and gave the Mongolian for the black market. Its fun that the well established price of going to Naarantul is 2000 tugriks, but every time I go in they try to charge me 10000 until I say something to them in Mongolian. They laugh on cue and then get their regular fare of 2000. Well after giving her her money I walk to the place where the Bagkhangai meeker leaves from and literally as I am walking there the meeker starts to back up with one “space” left. It was good luck in getting the meeker but this means that its stuffed to the rafters and on this trip its full of babies. Not kids but babies….AND THERE ALL CRYING! I didn’t even know my town HAD this many babies. Add to the fact I almost never hear them cry and I need to wonder what the hell. I imagine its when one hears the other they all chime in and cry…so a two hour stress test went horribly wrong as the babies all screamed and I sat awkwardly on the incline of two of the seats. Imagine if I lived 12 hours away! Ah well, least that’s one thing I no longer care about in terms of placement. Two hours away looks and feels as isolated as any other town in Mongolia really…anyways at least I got home without pushing the meeker either.

My hair was light as a feather and flowed to either side of my head instead of straight behind me as it does when caked in dirt and sweat after a month of only water rinses. I tried to regain my strength but unnaturally my legs demanded more of that wonderful strenuous activity it had gotten to do the week before. I did a little jump rope, but I was simply too clean to want to sweat up so quickly.

UB as always was nice. No PCV’s this time and instead I bumped into a couple cute French girls, a whitty Spaniard, and two Americans one of who was black. He was the first black guy I had seen in a really long time. It sorta put the idea that I as a tall white guy stand out in perspective. The American guys just couldn’t get over the fact that I am able to speak Mongolian. They both spoke Spanish and therefore a language that a good portion of the world speaks and here I am in the only corner of the world where this insanely difficult language is finally at a competency level and they stare wide mouthed as I rattle off to the waiter our drink order. Who knew that knowing an obscure language would get me cool points??? The Americans had seen the movie Avatar and seemed to think that the way I speak Mongolian sounds exactly like the language the characters speak in the movie. Havent seen it so no idea but as the design of a lot that is in Star Wars came from Mongolia we do seem to be a treasure trove for fantasy. I think the idea of following the day in the life of a youth hostel would make for an awesome TV show, for theres just far too many interesting plots in them. I took them out for a drink at a place that I got props for bringing them to good food and all around it was great.

Good thing we went in the group too because the kid street thief/beggars were in high gear. I was shouting at the group to full on push them off themselves as the kids quickly abandoned trying to rob me when they realized I would actually push them off me when they tried to grab my stuff. The men in the group instantly protected the women and within 50 yards the kids were all shouting wildly incorrect English cuss words at us and we all felt rather proud of how well we had handled that.

Mongolia and especially UB has an amazing child care system in place. Orphanages that could accommodate every lost soul exist in the city. There not religiously affiliated either and as a result are more nationalistic in nature than pious. The problem is that not all boys and girls are on board with staying there. Its not where you can just drop in and sleep the night and then head out to do whatever, no to stay means you full on are required to contribute and be a part of the community and do chores, go to school, and in general keep your life on track. Its like the family based culture of not being out there only for yourself, and as such I see the program as difficult but giving kids with a lot of disadvantages about as honest a shot of making it in the world as any other system out there.

Obviously not all kids are on board with this…and these are the ones shouting and pushing foreigners around for money and such. I emphasize they are an exceeding minority to those staying out of trouble…but it was just an interesting site last time.

When I got back to my apartment in the evening I had a visitor. This was most strange as I almost never do, but to top it off it was a woman not from this town either. Shes an English teacher in UB and the daughter of one of the elementary school teachers in town. We played cards for a few hours and just chatted, I think she was looking to hone her English skills. A divorced 20 something girl with only one kid spends a couple hours Sunday night with the white guy in his apartment. My that must have made for some tasty gossip in town, but luckily as a man I can only be its victim and not its creator….at least stereotypically.

Today at school I found out a lot of new stuff. The schedule has been changed yet again as from now on all 10th and 11th grade students from both my town and Baghkhangai will be taught in the Ondortolge school. At first this sounded cool but then made me realize when I teach next year at the other school I wont have 10th and 11th grades to teach. I just made new curriculums for em for bloody sake! Ah blast, but from what I gather the other school will keep me busy as well.

On that new information was passed on to me. I was summoned early to see the principal, training manager and Moogi to help translate for some kind of meeting. I rarely get to talk to them when I want to bring something up so I imagined this was quite important. We sat down and I listen to my neighbor and training manager ask me a question. I had been expecting a school question so what I thought I heard almost made me laugh. When Moogi translated I actually did laugh.

“Josh…next year at Bagkhangai do you still want to live in Ger?” Makes sense now that I think about it. This had been something I had brought up nine months back and they undoubtedly thought that after nine months in the wonderful apartment I am in today I would realize just how much easier and more comfortable apartments and houses are to the gers which I by no means need to stay at if I didn’t want to. Surely nine months living in Mongolia had knocked a little sense into me yes???

I don’t know how they reacted to me laughing but I replied yes. At this they kept looking at me so strangely. My towns are in the UB aimag and are quite progressive. Few wear dells except on holidays and with running water, fewer mice and radiators why in the hell would you want to live in a ger? Old school elderly are the only ones who prefer rocking out in gers if they have the choice between a ger and a house or apartment, which I do have the choice of.

In their defense I see how idiotic this must sound. For an adventuresome American the idea of living in a tent for a year probably sounds awesome, but you got to realize that gers and living essentially in a tent for years or even their entire lives is nothing new to anyone here, and as such you gotta give it an American perspective.

For instance, would you request living somewhere in America where you only have dial-up internet service providers “for the thrill of actually having to punch in to the phone line?” rather than a T1 Broadband connection? Its just flat out nuts, but in essence that’s the type of thing I am requesting to do. When I first got to Mongolia, I seemed to take note of all the crazy things that Mongolians do. Around late November I came to an important revelation that it was the other way around. Mongolians don’t act strange, Americans do! Mongolians don’t eat insane amounts of meat. Americans flat out refuse to! Mongolians don’t disrespect personal boundaries, Americans need 20 feet of personal space at all time! And so on!!!

The principal and training manager meanwhile finally realizing at long last that if I am crazy it’s a very unique brand they said. “Okay, but then you will move at start of the summer to ger so you can practice how to survive in winter.” I had initially been planned to be moved in August just before school opening. Now I am tentatively scheduled to do so the first week of June when school here wraps. Meaning in less than a hundred days not only do I move towns which after a little under a year here is suddenly hitting home but also that after all my earlier bitching and whining and complaining to all those within range after finding my site placement I find myself getting absolutely every single thing that I had wanted from my Mongolian living conditions as well. I will have lived in a house, apartment and a ger….the Mongolian Hat Trick. You know if I ever try to make this blog into a book I think I might call it that. Actually I had a rather clever name picked out in parody of that book about the women trying to learn so badly in certain countries called “Three Cups of Tea”. I may name my book “Three Shots of Vodka.” You think Oprah will pick that up?

But yea, so to all those who are gonna be future PCV’s in Mongolia heed my warning. I did not react well to my “luxurious” living arrangements when I first found out. I sat around moping about something to the point that I had to reintroduce myself in October when I saw a lot of the volunteers at consolidation who didn’t recognize me happy. Coming off like a complete moron and jerk is a surefire way to not build bridges to your fellow colleagues. I was just lucky that a feature of PCV’s is to be willing to forgive and forget as long as your willing to get it together yourself. Don’t we rock?

Also let me tell you whether your in the Gobi desert with a ger and ten camels outside or your one floor below the President of Mongolia with mirrors and hot water in a suburb of Ulaanbaatar I warn you, do not react negatively. Youll come off like a complete moron and if your actually interested in serving in Peace Corps more than caring about lifestyle then you will find yourself enjoying yourself no matter what corner of this amazing country you find yourself in. The work is amazing, and as I am the type that makes work my life I find where and how I live to be great as well…I just wish I remembered that at all times it would save me some apologies later.

When I realized what month we had just hit I came to the conclusion that in less than a hundred days I have not only a new town to live in but also a ger. I still txt with a few volunteers here and there and all those with gers tell me the exact same thing. Im gonna be in love with the idea for all of ten minutes and then the shine wears off and you realize you live in a round tent in a country with -40 winters. I haven’t a doubt they are right, and an ego is a terrible thing…but still. I just cant bring myself not to find some whimsical pleasure in the idea that for a year of my life I will occupy a round tent on the Mongolian steppes as I attempt to teach English and master a language spoken by only 3 million people on this planet. (More people speak fluent Hebrew than speak Mongolian!) The more I let things happen and stop trying to make everything into something that its not the more uniqueness I find. It’s a far less stressful way to live your life.

March 2, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: 30 degrees Fahrenheit…don’t buy it.

Today’s Quote: “When you make love to a woman you get revenge on all the things in life that defeated you.” –Ben Kingsley

Okay my weather beacon tells me that its 30 Fahrenheit outside. That’s rather strange because it feels really cold today and theres no wind out like yesterday. Seriously that’s as warm as its been in months and to me it just feels like a day where a hat is optional with a winter coat. Maybe I am just not feeling too good. Mustive been all those hot showers I took…..

Last night my school had a talent show of sorts. You see as ive explained theres no real loners in Mongolian culture. Just doesn’t happen, cant happen. It’s a little too rough and tough to do it by yourself, and last night I guess in school systems you see examples of that based on their dance/music performances. The clicques at school are also the ones doing the various performances. Noone gets assigned to perform here. When you have no internet and no ability to go outside for extended periods for months at a time you find yourself out of ideas as to what to do other than throw on a good show.

Fortuitously I actually brought my camera and got some great pictures and videos of some of my students performances. Some were traditional and played with the classical instruments, and others were dancing to Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face”

It’s a very refreshing thing that I observe in Mongolian culture is their pragmatism. They have traditions for one reason alone, they still are the most effective! If something better comes along they have no qualms about replacing a tradition with an update. This is regardless of origin of new updates or its methods. In essence, through pragmatism I see Mongolian as one of the most liberal societies I know outside of the United States and general travelers who require liberalism as well. Anyways ill be sure and upload some pics and videos when I get a chance in I imagine three or so weeks when I have a week off school. Never really been to UB during the weekdays I suddenly realize…huh.

Today the new schedule kept me busy as hell. We have three additional classes now and I have been given two of them. Eeep. Luckily I think I am finally getting the hang of teaching in Mongolian and in essence when you truly realize just how the system is setup there so very very little stress other than the amounts you put yourself on that you have no problem whatsoever. As usual reflection is easy as hell, its figuring it at the here and now that requires so much practice.

Tomorrows a long day too, but I don’t teach as many of those classes as I do today. Monday, Thursday and Friday each have only 2 classes, though there annoying spaced out so I need to arrive early and leave late and do very little in between. Still, as I mentioned long long ago there is so utterly little else I need to do so I may as well use the time to bond with the fellow teachers. Bring the warmth weather plz, getting bored inside!

March 3, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Today’s Temperature: 3 degrees Fahrenheit…no way the UB gauge saying its above freezing is true!

Today’s Quote: “Its all a dream…” –Julia

Got great news for the town of Bagkhangai! Today a van rolled up while Moogi and I were doing a lesson and who should pop out but two of the Peace Corps staff members! Todays item up for business…the reestablishment of this town as a training site! This is great news for everyone. Town gets credentials bump, pay over the summer for the Mongolian host families and teachers and I even get some new blood to intimidate with my semi competent Mongolian and war stories of the worst winter in 30 years.

The big debate is which town gets to house the volunteers, Ondortolge or Baghkangai. Both the teachers live in Ondortolge, but as ive described 90% of my town lives in apartments. For training, PCT’s are forbidden from having such a luxury as an apartment with power and water so they need enough Haasha families willing to take bodies in. That number may unfortunately for the teachers mean they need to commute to Baghkhangai. I am a little indifferent, but if they are in Bagkhangai that means ill see em on a more frequent basis unless I become a trainer in which case ill be seen by em everyday. Either works as ive said.

Tuesday and Wednesday have become workhorse days followed by Thursday and Friday being almost non-existant as well as Monday. Its strange but then again I think as the weather warms I will enjoy the days with extended periods of being able to be outside again. Fun fun indeed.

I did something today as well that I hadn’t in a long long while. With the temperature and wind defeating me for outdoor exercise yet again today I found myself at 3pm in my apartment wondering how to eat up time until school started again tomorrow. My options ran along the line of 1)playing my ocarina 2)practice Mongolian 3)go buy some alcohol 4)read every book that ive already read 6 times and read it yet again 5)watch yet another video clip or listen to yet another song on my computer 6)Play video games. These were all things I have been doing a lot of lately (cept the alcohol thing, but I want to break into the Mongolian millionare club at the end of March and I rather enjoy sobriety after being drunk for such a period of time so nah) So today instead I did something I haven’t done in over a year. With the trusty help of IMovie and Quicktime Pro I created a montage movie. Its amazing how with no computer knowledge outside an IT minor in 2004 (IE everything I learned is 2 generations out of date) one can make full on top notch movies oneself now thanks to how idiotproof computers are getting. While I am glad it does not exist now I am pretty sure that barring an end of world scenario of some kind my winter years of life will be spent with a vizor on my head playing a video game that reacts to my thought pattern given the speed to which technology is growing. I am okay with that btw…

Anyways so yea I made a montage movie. Heres the kicker, it took me longer to upload the video file into the editing software than it did to make the bloody movie itself. I made a montage of the love triangle in the Movie “House of Flying Daggers” featuring the music from Within Temptation called “What Have you Done.” Ill weigh options about if I should post it here or on Youtube…or either. This was sorta done for kicks…and I will say it did provide some variety, which was what I was going for.

Please melt snow, I need to go hiking again to get my legs used to going great distances! Three months until the First International Mongolia Marathon!

March 4, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Not fair? You keep saying that, I wonder what your basis for comparison is…” –David Bowie

I am abandoning my temperature gauge as of now for two reasons. The first being that while still too cold to go outside for extended periods of time its not nearly the -30 I was experiencing a month ago, so the point seems moot. The second being that I usually estimate the temperature based on the UB thermometer I can see on a Mongolia news channel. As I live two hours away I have often estimated that this is the closest I am going to get to knowing how cold it is without actually owning a thermometer…remind me to go get one sometime, they gotta sell em somewhere. Well today the UB therm dared to tell me that its 7 degrees Celcius. That’s 44 bloody degrees Fahrenheit! It cant be more than 10 degrees F out given the cold and the wind! Aside from not wearing wool socks anymore I have to wear the same clothes I have been wearing for almost a month now. Not that I don’t invite it to be 44 degrees outside…its just not!

So on to life. Sorta big news today regarding one of my students. I hadn’t brought this up in a blog entry before because I wanted to make an all inclusive blog instead of drawing out little by little update. One of my 11th grade students is pregnant. Actually she has been since the start of the school year. Today her doctor (our school doctor) ordered her home to wrap up her third trimester and give birth. Teen pregnancy and out of wedlock pregnancies are something once again that I think Mongolia handles WAY better than America. Heres a handful of examples.

To begin with everyone in town knows the father. A little risqué given that one is in school and one is not, but hardly something to cause a stir beyond gossip. The pregnant woman lives with her family, as everyone does until they marry or find a profession that can support them. The father of the child will of course help out as well. The pregnant teen has gone to school every single day the entire school year, and was not sent to another school as can happen in the American public school system depending on what state you live in.

Most of all I find the idea that shes not only not shunned but flat out pampered to by both the teachers, the community and her fellow students as a sign of how much easier Mongolian culture handles sex and its consequences. As a nation of liberal Buddhists/atheists/a handful of Christians/ancient pagans (not as many…but still) the idea of sex before marriage is and has almost always been quite expected and welcome, but even young people having sex is not out of the question either. On AIDS day back in December I did notice a lack of material advocating abstinence, and instead went into detail about having safe sex instead…saved a lot of time if you ask me.

Though getting pregnant before your 18 is probably not Plan A for everyone the age of pregnant women in this country is still quite young. I dunno it just felt like for a situation that would have rocked any community in America I have lived in and the school systems as well this pregnancy in my small Mongolian town was handled with the alertness and intensity of someone with a cold. Something to keep an eye on and handle accordingly. Though as a man in his late 20’s this obviously does not effect me as it might others, but I still found the situation so refreshingly received by the community I live in. Its another one of those examples I come across where I realize that its Mongolians who act sane and Americans are out of their minds…go figure!

So yea…she now doing her homework and classwork at home and should have the baby with enough time to walk on graduation. How fortuitous! (Though they literally just walk out the doorway with everyone watching, but still graduation)

Today I helped throw together some stuff for her to study. I hope to be one of the people who throws in a candidate name for the baby naming ceremony. I am thinking of Gandalf, you see it sounds a lot like a common Mongolian mans name Gambert, and forever my geek like impact would effect the Mongolians I have lived with….but somehow I doubt ill make the cut.

March 5, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “MAHHH MAHH MAHH SHOLEE!!!!” –This is the canteen lady shouting at me what food was available today. Meat Soup…what weve had for the past three days.

Today the UB thermometer reads -23 celcius. That’s -9 Fahrenheit. It doesn’t feel that cold either. Granted were still down in the low single digits but I doubt its below 0 F. Again this is why I am abandoning my daily temperature gauge as its just too unreliable. But tragically despite the inaccuracy its simply still too cold to go outside and run or really do anything fun. Its funny to look at the snow around here because much of it has been here since November. Snow in Mongolia is incredibly dry (climate thing) To those that make snowman know dry snow doesn’t glue itself easily to its fellow snowflakes. Add that the temperature here is not only freezing but then -30 below that and the snow crystallizes with itself, turning into either ice or this really grainy chunks of stuff that’s absolutely ridiculous to see. We cleared some off near the school entrance and it still sits in these giant chunks. Ill be sure and grab a picture.

Developments in computers have happened at my school. Everyone in my town aged 8-11 now owns their own laptop. Not bad huh? Thanks to the 1 Laptop per Child program and progressive school teachers with minor connections to parliament my town scored big with these machines. They’ve been distributed and as you can imagine the kids are going absolutely batty over their new toys. We don’t have wireless internet (or internet for that matter) so their use is limited to typing on screens but still, huge step for the community. It actually reminded me of an early computer that my family had in their house. I was a kid who used computers before computers were at every university, let alone home. I remember the first real computer being a Mac Plus. I can still picture the 7 inch screen right now…I played Mathblaster and Carmen Sandiego and Reader Rabbit on that thing…and now I am in Mongolia typing on a 17 inch Mac Powerbook Pro and all my Mongolian kids have computers…we come a long way.

Meanwhile in the computer lab I have brought a little more fun to the kids at the school. They have computer games, and better still educational ones! Yep, Mathblaster, Reader Rabbit, Carmen Sandiego. You see when I was young the only computer games I was allowed to posess were either educational in nature (such as these titles) or something stratagem based such as Sim City. I believe it was this early molding that gave me a taste for video games such as Civilization IV and Tropico 2. My brother adopted a more Doom like approach to his video games and…actually come to think of it I don’t think I have ever seen my sister play a computer game in her life…What the hell does she do all day then?

I also installed DragonsLair 3-D. An amusing game in which is not so much a fight and slash but one must solve puzzles in order to get to the next part of the level. Its handy as it requires very little English to play it, and is so far the most popular game. I gave a tutorial to the teachers of both the computer lab and the various subjects on how they could use the games in their classroom development and that went well too. I guess its sorta up to them about how much they plan to use it, but after watching kids play minesweeper for 9 months straight in which not once has any of them figured out that you are supposed to be deducing where the mines are based on the numbers that pop up I can only hope that ANY type of computer game would bring better recreation. So yea, one of my big projects is in its final phase…implementation.

Yesterday with five minutes of internet at my disposal I applied to be a trainer for the M21’s and snuck a peek at other PC Mongolia blogs. Apparently some are not getting funding approval for their projects. As my town is both progressive and well funded I find myself very rarely having to jump through such hoops. (I paid for the very cheap games myself) If I had been placed in one of my more distant locales that I had initially imagined I believe that is what much of my time would be focused on, but instead it seems my goal is to take the already acquired resources and be sure their being put to optimal use. I actually had to twist a few arms in my community to finally get them to distribute the laptops. So yea, we may all be PC Mongolia volunteers but we all have our unique circumstances don’t we?

You know what the month of March in Mongolia reminds me of? Its mile 23 of a marathon. What? You’ve never run 23 miles in your life? Ah no worries, let me fill you in. Basically your body is out of sweat, out of energy, your skin feels cracked and broken and though you can still use your legs you haven’t had any sensation in them for the past hour. Yet despite this your still moving along, somehow aware that three miles are all that separate you from an amazing accomplishment and a tall glass of water and food that is not a power bar. In essence the idea is at this point you have come so far that there is no longer a question of IF you will finish this race. After 23 miles if you have to drag your broken body across the finish line you will. Its just that you’ve been at this so long you just wish you could get it over with.

That is the same way I feel about March in Mongolia. Its technically the first month of Spring. I am long past -40 Fahrenheit days. I no longer wear wool socks and on days when its not particularly windy I can even go to school without wearing a hat. In essence the hard part is over. Baring an act I am not aware of I will make it through the Mongolian winter. I am aware of just how close I am to wrapping up this winter and having long sunny spring days of 50 degree afternoons and ground that goes from ice white to brewing brown all the way to the sea of green again.

Its all so close….but right now its not warm enough to go outside recreationally, and THAT is what is driving me crazy. I want to run, and hike. The hiking will be critical. I can jog 5 weekdays a week, but on Saturday or Sunday I need to get my legs used to doing strenuous work over long periods of time again. This means that I need to do what I did in October before the snow came and just pick a direction in which I just start walking and don’t look back. As the days get longer this will be easy….but the snow on the ground needs to melt and the wind needs to cut back to the point that I can at least move when I am against the wind.

Sorry for the long blog about little. I chose to pass on booze this weekend and with the weather being what it is I just cant seem to get out as much as I would like. Hope the states are warmer, heard the east coast had a tough time with it.

March 6, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’ Quote: “Dang! That hundred dollars could have bought me…ONE gallon of gas!!!” –Al Gore

So today I turned on my TV and instead of just looking at the temperature and turning it back off I flipped through the channels. I haven’t done this since the start of February and when I flipped to the channel that used to have Al Jazeera (hasent been on since October) I saw a new news network on. BBC World! Kick ass! I loved this network and hadn’t seen it in ages.

Well with no pressing agenda I watched a special they were doing on the internet and they did an experiment I could relate to. They went to Nigeria and brought broadband connection to a remote village that had never had internet before, and then they went to Seoul and they took away internet from 2 families. Wow, I wish BBC would have sent out a notice, I could have told them what I was doing! Wouldve made for a kick ass documentary.

Actually my circumstance is a little different. You see before Mongolia I was indeed quite the internet user. Living on a college campus from 2000-2009 allowed me to stream information at an astounding rate. There really was no wait for any info out there. Now when I came to Mongolia I got one feature of my living arrangement dead on right from the spot. The internet in this town is next to absolute zero. The internet café is used solely to play Warcraft, the schools internet 99.9% of all days is dead, and my sitemate contains the only reliable method in which I could use the internet all be it at a snail pace and I use mainly to blog post.

So indeed yes I did go from cutting edge to cold turkey, but in Mongolia where its not like you have a whole lot of options yes I can see how its not like I have many options here no matter how much I miss the internet (which honestly I really don’t all too much) Now if I lived in America right now and tried to keep myself off the internet I don’t know how successful I would be at that. As with food the act of denying yourself something you have is far harder and more painful than the discomfort you face from having nothing available to eat at all. As always that lesson may be one of the most important ones I have learned since coming here…That and be sure to eat something high in fiber after you’ve eaten over 2 pounds of goat meat in one sitting…youll thank me later.

More still is that I could very well have internet like my sitemate. With my laptop and a flash drive internet device that I could buy in UB for 250,000 Tugriks (about 160 dollars) I could have internet service practically anywhere in this country. At the moment I think I have around a million tugriks…not counting some chump change in an American bank account I am saving for some summer traveling.

Some of my fellow volunteers who have already done so I inquired about if they liked it. They all say the same thing, it’s a blessing and a curse. To have the ability to research or communicate at anytime does exactly what it does to us back in the states. It means that important things get handled NOW and not as soon as physically possible allows. So at the moment Ill pass on getting internet, but when I move to the next town in June it may just be something to consider. In essence I would give up indoor plumbing and get semi-slow internet service. Or as a fellow volunteer so eloquently put it, Outhouses and DSL. Jurys out…

March 7, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “A person who votes is noone, a person who counts votes is everyone.” –Joseph Stalin

Today I estimate we were just above negative Fahrenheit numbers, but outside it snowed. It was again that annoying thing of being weather where after much colder temperatures it wasent so much the cold that kept me indoors but the lack of ability to run that hindered me…so today I went for a walk. I don’t worry so much about finishing the Marathon in 3 months. Once you have run one marathon you begin to realize just what the human body is capable of and unless you get WILDLY out of shape you come to terms with the idea that your willpower gives out long before your legs or lungs truly do. However, the cold has all winter kept my runs very short. 30-40 minutes. I needed to get myself used to movement and activity for hours at a time.

Today I put on jeans, a pair of wool socks, my winter coat, hat, gloves and scarf and two layers of shirts and went out walking over the snow. I walked for just under three hours, and in doing so I walked approximately 13 miles, a half marathon. Not all that bad, and I easily could have doubled that based on how my legs feel. This is a good sign, my fastest marathon was done in 4 hours and 32 minutes, and I am a little curious how fast I will run this one.

Now at midday I find myself a little curious as to what to do next though. I really am not in the mood for alcohol this weekend, so I imagine a combination of a little Mongolian language learning followed by some video games will have to do. Ah it aint that bad. I gotta get some laundry done, though noone complains about my clothes and my standards are abhorrent even I can tell I am a little overdue in getting everything cleaned up.

Ive started to think up a side project that I am going to start next winter so I don’t find myself quite as bored as I did on some days this winter. Bayarcahn knows Russian, and since I know Cyrillic maybe I should try and learn a little. Would be a little more useful to know a little Russian as a skill on a resume than Mongolian. Maybe ill take up the horse violin if I can find someone to teach me as well. In essence I need an indoor hobby. The spring and summer will give me plenty of new abilities and opportunities to keep myself busy. The amount I am gonna run when the snow melts will put even me into shock!

March 8, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “A nations strength is not measured in its ability to wage war, but in preventing it.” –Gene Roddenberry

No school today. Some random holiday that my town apparently exclusively celebrates and noone bothered to bring me into the loop. Remember when I said Mongolians are pragmatic in nature? Their holiday schedule is one such example in that I believe the holiday took place on Saturday but in an effort to better coordinate it at a time when people would be in town the actual celebration is happening today so they can milk a day off work as well. Clever, America this is another place we should take a page out of the Mongolian book!

Showing up to school when you think theres class but there is not. I remember all the blogs I read before coming to Mongolia and for some reason this seemingly unimportant side note of a day somehow finds its way into every blog I read. Go figure. Not like my Mondays are all that busy anyway, I usually just team teach three classes with my counterpart Moogi so its not like I feel like I am missing out on all that much.

You know now that I think about blogs I think I remember getting my Mongolian placement in the month of March. I imagine a few volunteers are getting their invitation packets as we speak. The majority of the M20’s I talked with about this said that upon realizing they were going to Mongolia their thought process is always the same. They had believed they were heading somewhere else, but upon realizing they were going to Mongolia they quickly realized how cool that would be. My interviewer had told me from the word go that Mongolia was my likely fate, but I kept it under my hat for I didn’t want to be wrong and therefore disappointed. To all those getting invitations to Mongolia let me tell you something. Having been a volunteer only this time and never seeing or being in any other PC country as a volunteer I promise you as close to a moral certainty that there is NO other country on this planet more unique, amazing, difficult, and rewarding to be a Peace Corps volunteer in as Mongolia.

Pat yourself on the back you lucky buggers, and go buy some wool socks. And eat as much exotic fruit as you possibly can and drink insane amounts of good wines before you come. I remember a month before I entered service I asked my friend and former volunteer if I should start eating meat and less fruit to prepare myself for Mongolian food. He laughed and told me that you have two years to get used to it, eat nothing BUT fruit and spices before you come here. And hummus….and wine!!!! Youll thank me later.

Got a good lesson for each of my classes this week. A little physical moving around followed by some putting some of what we just acted out into writing. The week after is the last week of the third quarter. Test week obviously. Then a week off school. As always it’s the days that last forever but whole weeks take mere moments.

Last night I had a last year dream. Ever have those? That’s where you dream about exactly what you were doing a year ago that day. Well that’s what I had happen. I was standing on Fordham University’s main plaza in front of Keating Hall and on the step was none other than U2. I was an RD working security/crowd management. I was close enough to have touched Bono himself. Never really was a U2 fan but you gotta realize what a world this is when you find yourself in situations like that. I miss Fordham. Left a job I loved to do another job I love. As my dad always told me, that’s a good problem to have…point taken.

The day wrapped up with another drop in from Bolor. Bolor is Mongolian for crystal and it’s the name of a Mongolian teacher living in UB. I mentioned her earlier where her mother lives in my town and is one of the teachers at my school. I believe that while she never formally introduced her Bolor was made aware of a tall bachelor in this apartment block by her mother and she dropped in at the start of the month to say hi and has done so again. She is 23, divorced, not legally but here that’s tomato tomatoe difference (got her early relationship out of the way is the mentality if I understand it correctly in a culture where I explained that love is far more mild and healthy than us lovesick romantics that America and Europe are so famous for brewing up), only has one kid, and has a job as an English teacher at a complex school in UB. In essence, a Mongolian catch…and even long out of the dating game I think I understand what is expected of me when random single women come to my bareboned apartment to chat…

Added bonus is that of the Mongolian women I know she is definitely one of the prettier ones too. I have a type and rarely do women from Mongolia fit it but still, quite pretty. She came to celebrate womens day with her mother and sister and spent the last hour before going back to UB hanging out with me. Its so amusingly awkward. We sort of sit in my room and just play around with Mongolian and English as my room does not exactly have a whole lot of exciting traits to it. More then that this sorta was a most unique encounter when a girl I didn’t even know just randomly knocked on my door a week ago and I invited her right in. I don’t even want to imagine what her mother two floors down thinks we are doing! Nah I think its pretty obvious she wants to be more than friends, I dunno. Its all very complex and luckily the awkwardness keeps us pretty superficial at this point. Just gotta keep an eye on it.

She was looking over my family photos and she saw what I looked like with short hair and again commented on how much more handsome I am with shorter hair. It’s irony thick enough to choke a whale. I have thick dark brown hair that grows like a weed and in America I kept myself a quarter inch past marine my entire life. Now I come to a country where the crew cut is the hottest thing a man can do and I grow my hair out to its insane length of today. Girls want me to cut my hair….what do you all think? Ill add in a picture in my hair at next blog posting. Nine months without a cut, that’s easily gotta be a record.

Wow…cool flashback. When you all took your sociology class your Freshman year of college did you have to read “The Forest People?” Its this English guy who lives with a bunch of pygmies in Africa and its amazing stuff and all that but I do suddenly recall where a woman was put to him and he had to use amusing tact to get around not sleeping with her and not losing face with the village. I am not at that stage yet, but I suddenly think I get how those like him and James Cook must have felt when they tried to turn down the company of exotic women. General all around awkwardness….i imagine many other volunteers would be turning this “problem” of mine into a solution. Jury’s out people, im not sure how to react at this point. She is nice and pretty, and she brought me cake this time. What do you give as a gift that’s not alcohol anyways? Fruit probably…like I gave my mom.

March 9, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I have a pressing urge. To go…farther than any man has…or perhaps even can…” –James Cook

Great long day of school. Classes went well, even the 7th graders gave me a break today. I spent the rest of the time helping out with team teaching the other classes. After school wrapped up I was invited over by the building jijur (administrator) for some meat and tea. I was rather flattered, and glad to be given the invite. The food was excellent too.

Big news. Next week is test week for the third quarter, and after that I have 2 count em 2 weeks off school. Outfreakingstanding. That’s enough time not only to drop into UB and wash clothes and all the regular chores, but then I feel as though 2 weeks is enough time to do something rather daring. This is all in the developmental stage but right now I am thinking about going out west. Some of the old Erdene crew got stationed out there and seeing as I bitched and moaned about not getting put far far away from my site I can at least travel to them, and see some old buddies in the process. Its still a little too cold to enjoyably travel though, and where I propose to go is so far out that those living in the distant aimags don’t drive but fly (on PC’s dollar, insanely out of my price range) You think I can make three days in a bumpy and rusty old Russian shockless jeep to the most impossible reaching corner of Monoglia in one piece? If you said anything but yes perhaps I should remind you I am the dude who not only survived a trip on Cambodia’s only active 20 hour trainline, but I even made the Kessel Run in under 12 parsecs!

Nah but there would be a drawback, not being able to run. Today something amazing happened. As I walked along the snow/ice blocks to school today I was not flailing for my life as I always had before. In fact my footing seemed quite stable. I looked down and couldn’t believe my eyes…my feet were sinking in. After Id guess over four months of non stop ice and freezing temperature the sun and the temperature must have actually reached a level at mid-day was able to thaw and melt a tiny fraction of the snow around me. I thought about all that ice right then and there. All the dirt, feet, urine, booze, and endless dust that had settled in with it. A tapestry of waste…It would have brought tears to my eyes if I wasent a little dehydrated.

This means though that if the weather stays like this I could be looking at daily runnable weather in the coming weeks, and id like to spend it on foot then crammed in a van. In essence I like to think of it like this. I live in the center of Mongolia. I will go north this summer to run the Hovsgol Lake Marathon, and in the fall I go South into the Gobi to run the Gobi Desert Marathon, and that leaves everything out west and east to see….Might as well see it all right? Ill think it over, and text a few of the old Erdene crew to see if they are game. This might not be something to do alone if at all possible.

Run a hundred miles….or travel over a thousand…..decisions decisions…

We also had a staff meeting today. Three hours, I kid you not. Fordham University gave me a good stomach for sitting in an enclosed space with people id rather not spend as much concentrated time with listening to dry exchanges of information 99% of which has no bearing or effect on me whatsoever but egads peoples! Though this was a special case and something was indeed up this week. There had been a bad round of gossip or so and two people in particular were really going all out. Moogi tried to let me escape, but in an effort not to distance myself from the fellow teachers I hung in there. It wrapped up soon enough.

It sorta flashes me to something my dad briefly mentioned about being one of the bosses in his company where his subordinates basically all have these long drawn out arguments in meetings over whats best to do. When they got tired or arguing with one another they would just nudge him awake where he either says “were doing this..” or “were not gonna do that” and the conversation instantly ends. Say what you will about being a businessman in America, but I think teachers and the field of education could learn something about meetings from my dad and the American businessman!

Ger update: Peace Corps called me and asked for the name and number of the people who will be my hasha family in Baghkhangai. No doubt they just want to feel em out and make sure there cool with having a tall white guy who doesn’t know every word of Mongolian for a years time and that the ger has things like electricity and a lock on the door.

But apparently when I asked for this information I was told to stall PC for a few days as the principal of my town is reassigning me to another ger. Its likely what is known as a four wall ger. PCV’s are either in 4 or 5 wall gers. 5 walls are bigger, not by much and that doesn’t bother me. Its easier to heat a four wall. Five wall gers are usually for families and such and a bachelor can quite easily make a home in a four wall. Aside from that I don’t know the family yet. Hopefully we will get along. Now that I have some Mongolian and this being a town I have spent very little time in I can treat this as yet another fresh start and this time I am going to be sure that I am active with my neighbors. Mongolia will break me out of my Anglo-Saxon reserve even if it kills me! Its also official that it will be the town of Bagkhangai that houses the new bloods this summer. Itll be nice to be helpful like Julia was to me last summer. Erdene is also gonna house another batch of trainees too. That means my mom and sis are likely gonna have another American son or daughter. Right on! So would that like make us half brother sister once removed or adopted brother sister? My family on my mom’s side has a few genealogists, ill ask them.

March 10, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of miles run today: 4

Today’s Quote: “Out of my mind?… Well that’s between me and my mind.” –Jubel Earley

New opening indicator in case you skimmed past that. Ill discuss this in todays blog but as I no longer log the weather the amount I will jog each day will be put up whenever I do go out running. As much of this blog is for me this also will be a passive way of reminding myself to run more, though after a day like today I wont need any reminders.

So yea, on to today. Wednesday is a long day of school. There from opening to close, and with classes all in between. They went very well, and today Moogi and I did some of our best team teaching to date by creating a test for next week to wrap up third quarter. Then as I mentioned I have two weeks off. Yesterdays ambition to travel out west for the sake of travel got its plug pulled for two reasons. The first being that when I sent out some feelers to the old Erdene crew as to what everyone was up to not everyone seemed to have two weeks off like I did. I think some school systems stayed closed a week longer that we did during swine flu and the backlash was that they needed to be open for one of these two weeks that we now have off. I also pulled the plug because I feel that even with my trip in July up north I should still have more than enough time to go as far east or west as tickles my fancy. So yea, ill spend the two weeks here running.

Speaking of running. Today the weather was so warm. I could tell the minute I looked out my window in the morning and there was no ice on my window as there has been for over four months. The sun shone like it always does (that sun was my saving grace this winter) and as I was in class I knew that after four LONG months of cold, ice, falling on my ass and snot freezing in my nose itself that Spring at long last had come. (I love it. For one day the temperature is probably around 38 Fahrenheit and I think I am in a sauna!) The snow little by little is trickling away. Better still is that aside from the huge piles of ice that form when a certain hill configuration is formed the constant wind of this country and dry snow kept the layer of ice that covered everything in this country to only an inch thick. With the warmth out the ice just trickles away. Already I can see mounds of brown out in the distance and the road is now bone dry and ice free….spring is here. When you live an uncluttered life you begin to come to terms with just how remarkable things like a world without snow or clean water actually are…everyone’s really psyched about that “Avatar” movie I have yet to see…who needs Cameron when I have a different colored ground!

No delusions anyone! I am well aware that in the blink of an eye another cold front will sweep in and may even bring a new round of snow, but for I think the settled temperature will be just above freezing from now on, leaving me less encumbered in movement as I don’t have to wear my massive coat and hat, and able to spend more and more time outside, like I did today when I went out running. Yep, I threw on the layers and went outside. Maybe I don’t have the power I did before the freeze at the end of October but right now I can keep myself going at a run for over 4 miles with energy to spare! With three months until the first Marathon that is absolutely perfect! That gives me 10 or so weekends to build my runs from 8,10,12,14,16,18,20 miles. (these don’t really make you stronger….you need to convince your mind that its physically possible to keep yourself moving for such a period of time) Add to that that I have ice free roads and a comfortable schedule I should be good to go.

Now lets talk about hair. I have made a command decision. This is no country for long haired men! The women of my school (you ever been yelled at by a 12 year old about your hair?) are simply fed up with the length of my hair as it is. Yes, my long and I am sure in America quite handsome hair is simply the ugliest thing that Mongolians have ever seen and when they saw a picture today on my computer about what my hair looked like back in the summer they were simply fed up and demanded that I cut my hair….so heres my plan. At the end of April I will take a meeker into UB for my monthly resupply and R&R and during this time I will go to one of those random barbers and at long last yes I will get a bloody haircut back to my summer length. Now before you say anything hear the rest of this out! So I figure that means that it will be nice and short for the warm summer and the marathons and all the good things that come from short hair and such…but then that means that 14 or so months later my hair will have grown past the length that it even is at now and then I will wrap up my term of service and can return to the states for the first time in my life with long hair and into a society where such a fashion is popular, though given my luck Mongolia and America will switch and ill find my hair length unsatisfactory yet again. Personally I will say that long hair to me feels novel but is not my style. I am a crew cut Peace Corps type of guy. Still….a lot of what I do feels novel so for now long hair suits me just fine, but I got Mongolian women breathing down my neck these days!

Hair and running….these really are the days huh?

March 11, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Head of State, a Sith is just a Jedi who went off their meds.” –Daala

Beautiful day outside, and the temp is only just below freezing, but gale force winds are out in full force and unfortunately that drops the temp down another 20 degrees. Ill have to use today as my day off of running. Shame I wanted that to be tomorrow, course its not like I have a whole lot pressing going on either day.

After a week of trying I was finally able to get my grandmother and grandfather on the phone today. Ive been trying like mad but something is wrong with the receiver in the area or something because every time I tried calling they said the gateway was blocked or something like that. No matter, I got through. They sound happy and in good health. Just what I wanted to hear.

Nine months in Mongolia…nine months in the Peace Corps. What a life…what a world…Another rather large anniversary I think happens in March as well. Peace Corps just turned 49! Not bad! Not bad at all. Way too many feats and accomplishments to list em in a blog entry in which I don’t have the internet to check facts so if you want to know more just take a look around the Peace Corps website. I like that ill be a volunteer during the 50 year anniversary of its formation. Peace Corps, perhaps the only true survivor of the great society. Say what you will about money spending bleeding heart liberals but we like to help dammit!

On to movies. Tripp loaned me a movie called Taken. I am glad Liam Neison is still getting roles. He and Harrison Ford keep seeming to get the same roles where the all American dad (though Liam is English) keep seeming to find their family in danger and they risk all to save them. They have their niche, like Jodi Foster doing the single mom or battered women roles, or Ben Stiller playing a short man fighting not to display his inferiority complex…digress…okay so the plot of Taken has Liam’s daughter kidnapped on her first trip out of the country to Paris by some ass of some kind and he has to rescue her.

Interesting cast I will say that. Frankie Jameson (played Jean Grey in X-Men, though my favorite role was the woman in Deep Rising) plays the mother…btw remember when I said I had a type but didn’t specify in earlier blog entries. Shes pretty much a walking example of my type if you were curious. Also Shannon who died in the second season of Lost plays the girl too.

I love the mentality of the movie of how “your not safe and can be kidnapped anywhere” runs into complete contradiction with my life. Unlit empty train cars in Cambodia. Thai meekers filled with massive and drunk thai guys. Drinking towns away from my hostel at German beer festivals. Wandering the rice paddies of Northern Vietnam. Did all my traveling alone and in countries in which not only did I not speak the language but I stood a foot taller than everyone else so blending in was not an option.

Never once even worried for my safety let alone got in trouble. Now luckily I have had a few things going for me when it comes to travel to far off places. I traveled poor and light. Also I am a guy and while I may not be strong enough to win a fight luckily my build suggests that I could. I also didn’t start traveling much until I reached 24, and at that point I had finally gotten myself organized in life (still waiting on maturity but I learned how to hold myself in a more confident manner.) Theres just the confidence thing. Your gonna get robbed (or in the movies case abducted) if you look like you cant handle yourself or don’t know what your doing. Best advice you could ever get: Fake it till you make it everybody. A lie is a lie…unless someone else believes your lie, and then it’s a commonly held belief! Cool movie too…

March 12, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Number of miles: 5

Today’s Quote: “Well…another day another doughnut. And now for your edification and enjoyment without further ado and with no more dilly dallying around…” –The way the greatest teacher I ever knew started his classes.

Ah…beautiful day! And with this being Mongolia that is really saying something! But yes indeed today the sun was even brighter, the snow little by little started to melt in certain spots and all around you can tell that the winter days are little by little finding their way behind us!

Went out running after classes today, and felt great once again. Each time I run now I see a little more dirt on either side of the road. Off in the distance I see more brown hills instead of white. Inch by inch the season of spring is arriving. So perfectly timed and utterly invigorating. I forgot just how good exhaustion feels. To balance an exhausted mind with an exhausted body. It brings sleep that babies envy. Come Sunday ill start my long run weekends. Eight miles will be enough. A 15k. Some of the road still has a smidge of ice near the other side of the air force base so 2 out and back runs should do it.

The rest of this evening will be spent playing some Settlers and sending a few quick emails. Ill pass on updating the blog until I get back to UB next weekend. I sorta have been enjoying being off the grid a little more these days now that I have the luxury for going outside for periods of time.

March 13, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “I vote he’s not in charge!” –Charles Gunn.

Yesterday sadly was a tease of weather. I woke up this morning to blowing snow and bitter cold yet again. I am very glad to have gotten those runs in when I did though. After the run its great to throw water on my face and to feel all the salt trickling out of my pores. Nothing feels better than it, and unfortunately I cant do so again today. Clean the room, play some video games, maybe even a few rounds of cards with the neighbors…ill think of something to do round here.

Oh but big and bummer news. There was an M19 I knew that I liked and got along with really well who I just found out bailed on Peace Corps service. Dangit! Really wanted to hang out with her, and she was an M19 for cryin out loud. She had another 5 or so months to complete in service. Ah blast. So now Peace Corps finds itself one body shorter…too bad really. Actually if the hear say is accurate the reason is a good one, but the reason behind that reason is Peace Corps doing, and though I would never doubt the infinite reasoning which is Peace Corps I found that to be a bummer as well. Sorry again for the cryptic talk, want to keep this all basic.

March 14, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “Hey! Do not hit me with that truck!” –John Hancock (the movie not the famous guy)

Something rather amusing happened last night. I was heading out to get a few beers for the evening when the store had a new brand. It was in Cyrillic but the translation made me laugh, and brought a little bit of New York to Mongolia…by way of a Russian beer.

Near the corner of 2nd avenue and 4th street (the east village, by far the best part of New York, an opinion shared by the late George Carlin too btw) is the Krane theatre which one floor above is a little bar called the KGB bar. Its all red, posters of Lenin and stuff, rather cheesy but still kinda nice. Anyways they sold a beer that I really liked called Baltika. It comes in 6 different flavors designated by numbers. Last night, the beers were right there.

In manhattan a beer of baltika cost me six bucks. That’s more than I make in a day here, and that more than some make in a week here! The beer in the store cost a thousand tugriks…about sixty or seventy cents. Its all relative huh? Speaking of manhattan, I saw on BBC world news that its 50 degrees in New York right now. Oh good gods when it gets that warm here again…..tick tick tick.

Boring day…boring weekend for that matter. The snow yesterday coupled with the howling wind and cold grounded me once again. Come back warmer days (and by warmer I mean 40 degrees…seriously that’s all I really need!) So yea, my blogs talking about beer…hey think of it like this. If your this bored reading about my boring weekend, just imagine how boring it must be to actually go through with it! Ill play the ocarania. Getting pretty good at it too.

March 15, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Quote: “So…it’s a show about three hookers and their mom?” –Brian describing the plot of Sex and the City.

This evening the students of my school put on yet another show. Basically it was exactly the same thing that had been put on a few weeks back but this time it was done at the school. Watching the dances does show all that Mongolians dance and sign pretty much about the same theme over and over again. The dance is usually men riding horses or portraying the shagai dice that

-February 13, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -15 Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Everything is going to be okay….Everything is not going to be okay” –The themes of the movies “Before Sunrise” and “A Scanner Darkly”

So two nights ago my buddy wanted to play video swap since I now posess some new material. I drop in and as usual the conversation ended with him loaning me one of his dells for Tsagen Tsar which happens tomorrow and some mild amounts of vodka drinking….really don’t like vodka… Eight months trying to get used to the thing, I don’t flinch when I drink the stuff anymore but in all honesty its like learning to take a multivitamin without throwing up…you don’t get used to the pill, you just train yourself not to express it as much.

Last night I was watching a movie I hadn’t seen in a while. It’s a Richard Linklater film called A Scanner Darkly. I like Linklater, though my favorite movie of his is little known called “Before Sunrise” It’s the movie of an American and a Frenchwoman who have a love at first site type of connection and spend only one night together in Vienna, Austria. I miss Germany and by extension Austria as well… Year and a half Germany…anyways back to “A Scanner Darkly”

Its hard to categorize and all I recommend is that you watch it to understand it. Its strange how I came to know that movie too. In the fall of 2006 I was in Thailand in a small little bungalo which I shared with a dozen or so English soldiers on leave. The soldiers were there for…well figure it out…but I was there for the beaches and the kickboxing and closure and a lot of things that didn’t really have anything to do with Thailand but one way or another that’s where I ended up. My time in Asia was another one of those things that opened and closed doors on so many possible outcomes of my life and as such it was a blessing…and a curse.

Anyways at the bungalo we had a DVD player and TV, which was ridiculous as there was only one pirated copy of a movie available at the house. Yup…A Scanner Darkly. As the majority of my time in Thailand was spent either working out, sitting on a beach, and sweating like mad and the majority of my fellow roommates were getting literally in touch with the women of Thailand I found myself many a nights with little to do other that sit in the bungalo watching this movie over and over again.

Its one of those movies that is not there to cheer you up, that has no pressing conflict, and the movie after everything is said and done will leave you drained both physically and in spirit. I call this type of movie a “mono movie” and I have several others that fit this description. “The Weatherman” “Bringing Out the Dead” “Fight Club” “A Scanner Darkly” all fit this description. BTW: The term mono movie has two meanings behind it. The first is accurate in describing how the movies give you an all around fatigue from viewing them but the term also applies because these are also movies best watched literally when you have the disease mono. The movies are not action packed, the people often speak quietly or even whisper during the movie, and you can fall asleep a third of the way through the movie, reawaken for the last third and you wont feel like you missed anything.

I know that subjecting oneself to something that I describe in such a way may sound masochistic, but luckily I did not have such an experience watching it four years later. The film is excellent and I am glad that I now have it. In fact I am considering creating a list of movies and shows that I recommend PCV’s bring with them to Peace Corps service. I am also gonna make a packing list too….to the avid blog reader prior to service that I once was I will say that was never information I found in the Mongolian blogs and as we are on the other side of the world that is something worth knowing in advance. Lets just stress btw that my list will be very unofficial and merely my opinion. I do not speak for Peace Corps….disclaimer and all that…

So the good news is that I now have a winter dell that I can wear in addition to my blue shirt for Tsagen Tsar. I am amazed how comfortable a dell is, and I do make those things look good! Ill need to remember that and get one for myself. It’s a type of clothing that is exclusive to this country during only its cold months and If I wear this anywhere else ill be made fun of….but in all honesty that is my style isint it huh?

Ill make the next blog long and descriptive and be sure to have lots of pictures taken, but I also uploaded the blog so that this one can springboard into Tsagen Tsarr. Buuz eating, vodka drinking, and all around craving merriment. Ill let tomorrows blog describe it. I am gonna take it easy today with some video games and books….got me a long few days ahead.

…the next morning followup: I wrote that blog entry early in the morning. At 11am the power went out. It stayed out the rest of the day. Occasionally the power goes out for an hour or two…that’s as long as its ever been out. I was fortunate in that I own several flashlights, but I was impressed at how quiet and dark things got without my apartment having power. It reminded me of living at my host families house when at night I had a planetarium with how dark it got. Next year when I move to a ger away from these apartments and the weather gets warm enough for me to go outside I will look forward to star gazing again

February 15, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -10 Fahrenheit or so

Today’s Quote: “All bad ideas have one thing in common, they seemed like a good idea at the time” –Josh Jacobs

Tsagen Tsar….wolf! Its like Thanksgiving but with a hell of a lot more drinking involved. So I went to my neighbors yesterday and sat down, got pumped full of food and booze as we all sat around in dells. Good food and drinks too. I think we should have fermented horse milk to drink in America. We have horses, and the stuff actually starts to taste pretty good after a while. Beats vodka that’s for damn sure.

Anyways I got another two days of this so ill keep this entry short. I of course got some pictures so ill be sure to include that in some future photo update.

February 16, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -12 Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Theres nothing hotter than a woman who can kick my ass.” –Spike Speagle

I woke up this morning and couldn’t even remember what country I was in for a few minutes. Thirty minutes later and a gallon of water and I finally got my head back on straight. No blackouts, just general discomfort. Visited some more neighbors and did my best to put on a happy face when I couldn’t understand somebody. I lost count after 30 of the number of buuz I ate too…

I give up folks. Theres no secret mantra to vodka drinking for me. Some days I can drink a bottle of the stuff in under an hour and recite the Cyrillic alphabet backwards…and other nights the stuff just turns me inside out. Theres no tolerance to build, theres no food/drink combo that takes the sting out. When I finish my term of service in Mongolia I am going to drink vodka probably ONE more time in my life and that’s it! (I figure ill bring a bottle of Chinggis Gold back with me and my dad and brother can split a bottle with some Sharkys pizza down on the Carolina beaches)

…so yea…Tsagen Tsar rocks again. Its thanksgiving but with more drinking. Fun thing about it is that this technically is supposed to be the turnaround point weatherwise. After this holiday its supposed to get warmer and warmer. Of course, this being a particularly brutal winter ive decided not to expect the snow to be fully gone until April. March is gonna be a tough month, not because it will be cold, but that it wont yet be warm and its been over four months with ice on the ground and its too cold outside to go for a walk. That’s what will be tough.

This is the last night of Tsagen Tsar. We return to school tomorrow morning with what I imagine will be bloodshot eyed teachers and tired students. This week of teaching will probably be a wash…no worries though.

Oh and while nursing my head I watched a few films ive been meaning to get around to. The House of Flying Daggers and Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon. The movies were alright but the love story involved…I hate love triangle movies. They hit home for me, and worse still is that when I am honest with myself I am not often identifying myself with a character I particularly like. In the triangle that was my own personal mess I saw myself more as Lancelot than Arthur. More like Leo than Wind. More Zekk than Jag. More Tristan than the king. In essence im the one I hate, the pot stirrer and the one that ruined everything… good gods im such a girl sometimes! Nursing a hangover and I can still drive myself crazy by thinking too much… Alright, gotta go shave and get back out there. Time to knock on a few more neighbors doors.

February 19, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -5 Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “She killed you!!!...i helped her, that one counts as mine!” –Two heroes arguing over whose done more

Tsagen Tsar technically only lasts for three days, but in my town even here on Friday I have still been invited to feast and drink at various members of the communities homes. One of whom I intend to go to after I wrap up this entry. Its an amusing holiday that I am sure many other bloggers will comment about and go into far more detail about the ritual involved but ill do a very unjust summary of the holiday.

You go to all of your friends homes (if your rural Tsagen Tsar can last for almost a month because you have to travel to them) You greet them with “Good Tsagen Tsar” (good new year) then you sit down at a table with a large cake and plates of meat from a whole sheep that’s been killed just for the holiday. This has a lot to do with standing and whoever has the most meat and more importantly fat on their table is obviously the most generous and fortuitious of the community. (The whole face thing, ill come back to that later.)

After this your technically required to eat at least one mouthful of potato salad, a piece of meat the head male of the house cuts off the animal, and then consume three buuz. Oh yea, you also need to drink three shots of vodka minimum. This country very rarely does the minimum! We usually show up to a house where they bought four bottles of top shelf vodka (the stuff even I cant afford!) and noone gets to leave until someone throws up, a fight takes place, someone passes out, or we run out of vodka. Usually we run out of vodka, though I have seen the other three circumstances happen…and remember most of my counterparts are freaking women!

Each party is different and some families are extremely formal and traditional and some are progressive and jokingly go through the motions. It’s a lot like America for thanksgiving. The ritual is all around the same for almost every family but theres degrees of variation…though I don’t think there is ANY American family that drinks as much as Mongolians do on this holiday.

I will say this though. I have learned a very important thing about myself this week. I am a man who has the power to drink, and to drink a great deal for that matter. I am tall and sufficient in build and carry with me ancestral roots of those who have drank much for many generations and I find myself in communities where of age drinking has always been acceptable (I didn’t drink until I was 22)

Yet before this week I had never been on a bender. I had been to beer festivals in Germany but that wasent the same as this, and my BAC in Germany was surpassed the first night of Tsagen Tsarr. From Monday all the way to this morning I imagine I have had a little alcohol in my blood system and thank gods im young because I don’t know how middle aged guys could pull that off and come out in one piece. Actually given the amount of blood I have seen in some of the outhouses I believe that its one of the circumstances where they simply don’t care and just drink away and to hell with their health. Ill be honest im not the biggest fan of that, but like so much of what you encounter in Peace Corps service you have to pick your battles and its recommended that you only pick ones you can win.

Yet I will say having gone through a bender now, having spent over eight months in Mongolia and doing everything I can to match my counterparts in their drinking habits and having woke up this morning with blood that was probably flammable I reach only one conclusion. I am not an alcoholic. I just don’t have that drive that others do where the discomfort they experience from high amounts of alcohol is not overrunning the desire to be intoxicated. Just not my thing…all I want is a glass of wine and some hummus instead of meat. Neither are gonna happen here but its their not a habit I intend to bring with me after I complete my term of service.

Before I run though I did want to stress something though. Tsagen Tsar is an important Mongolian holiday where one is supposed to demonstrate their wealth and generosity to their fellow community. I understand and respect that, but many in my community are poor, and yet spent abhorrent amounts of money to make their display seem magnificent. In February many family’s who receive stipends of support from the government, and from what I gather almost all of that money is spent on making sure there Tsagen Tsar display rocks. I understand the mentality of wanting to put a good foot forward, but to me the display seems so unnecessary and draining on an already poor families resources. This seems to happen for other holidays as well and I just think that if these poorer families cut back they would then be able to spend the money on feeding their children later in the month instead of them taking up more welfare. To me the idea of putting on a good show is so annoyingly fake. Noone one doesn’t know each others wealth in this country and its gotta be known by those putting on the display that they are not kidding anybody. Maybe I just hate fakeness more than I used to and the more I observe day to day life and reflect on my time back in America I find lies that are agreed upon to be even more distasteful than I used to.

Again these are thoughts and observations that I keep to myself as I am both new to this culture and to my community, I just wish it was not always this way. Well I think this next house will be my last Tsagen Tsar. Not bad, I got through it with only one vomit of food, which I luckily hid from most of my community and never passed out. Back to carrots and potatoes and some water as well. The weather warmed a little these past couple days. Maybe I can try running tomorrow after I sober up. Itll probably be a good way to burn off the 20000 calorie diet I have been on this week.

February 20, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: 10 degrees Fahrenheit. WE BROKE OUT OF NEGATIVE!!!

Today’s Theme Song: “Fire” by the Mortal Kombat Soundtrack. Good running song

I woke up this morning sober for the first time in nearly a week. No endless amounts of vodka and fat and meat being crammed down by throat by overzealous Mongolians who seem to think that if they load me up with this stuff ill either do something stupid or ill become a full blooded Mongolians, both of which I think they want me to be.

I looked outside (my windows were no longer frozen over) and the bright sun looked as amazing as it always did. That sun definitely got me through some cold days, and when I turned on my TV my news network told me it wasent even negative Fahrenheit weather! First time in I imagine two months that’s happened.

Not willing to let myself think of anything else, I put on my layers and went out running. I had a lot backed up in my body in terms of fatty foods and alcohol and I needed a really good sweat to burn it out. I was really out of shape, and it only took me a 5K to run out of gas. Its funny where neither my lungs nor my legs gave out but instead I just felt all around beat to hell, but at the same time I loved how it meant that i was getting it out of me. Like I was turning a corner from the months of decadence and cold groundings. I sweat it all out, ran water through my hair and shaved with a new razor blade. I felt like a million bucks. A salad would have put me into Nirvanna, but I had to settle for the rest of the fruitcake my grandparents sent me.

I know this is a false illusion of warmth. It technically still is freezing outside and something tells me in a week or so the temp will drop back down to what it was before, but Tsagen Tsar does take place when it’s the coldest out. When a week ago it was in the -30s and now its in the positive if still freezing numbers, you come to realize how cold is relative, as is discomfort from the elements. Its halfway through the woods, and every future day brings me back to the summer, when I can walk the hills and go running for hours on end…provided I get my running legs back in the Spring…thatll be tough but then again I love how I feel right now.

Ill clean up my room and throw out some empty mongol soda bottles to give my cleansed body a cleansed enviroment but I tell ya the day already feels like something good is just gonna feel better and better. Maybe this wouldn’t work in a place where I could shower everyday and had salads to eat whenever I pleased, maybe there is something to the idea that comforts truly are another kind of suffering. I try not to overthink that and instead just realize how I wouldn’t feel good now if I hadn’t felt bad before… someone else think that one over, im gonna go clean my place up.

February 21, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: 8 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Theme Song: “When its Over” By Sugar Ray. Another feel good running song

The weather stayed the same. The sun beamed down and the temperature outside was in the positive Fahrenheit temperatures. I ran again, and this time I had company. Mongolians are really in spirit not all that different than me when I think about it for more than a few minutes. I think that while they may not have my tolerance for extreme colds they find temperatures like this to be perfectly acceptable to take a stroll outside. Today as I headed out to run I threw out some empty beer bottles into the garbage rectangle I wrote about once and some kids noticed me in my winter running clothes.

They run up to me and start shouting over and over again “GUUUEEHHNN YAHAHOOOO!?!?!” (are you running?) to which I respond yes in 50 different ways and as I start to jog they follow along. Maybe ill have my running club after all! Well those that tagged along were only 10 years old and weren’t expecting to run. They were dressed in jackets for the winter and after a few minutes they were shedding layers and huffing profusely.

It reminds me of my time at Fordham University when I was an RD and I had a running club with some of the 18 year olds in my building. To me there were a lot of good reasons to have a running club. It bonded me with my community, it kept the kids from drinking as often and it kicked some of the energy out of their 18 year old bodies. All of this was good, but the joy in running lightly and having someone a little under 10 years younger than me huffing and puffing was a bit of a guilty pleasure as well. Even in our good acts you can find selfishness in what you do, don’t change so to speak just be aware.

So its me and 3 ten year old boys jogging along on a cold but sunny day. Many in the community loiter around the steps of the culture center, located at what may as well be the center of town. As we came back the kids were all dying and parked it to cough up a lung, but I did the last ten minutes of my cardio running around the square. I was great entertainment for all those who were outside watching. It reminded me of my first few months in Ondortolge before the winter set in, only this time I could communicate with all the various members of this community, and they were far more welcoming of this tall white boy who recreationally brings himself into a sweat that doesn’t involve soccer or volleyball.

Still the run did more of what I had been hoping, reminding my legs about pain. I had worried that the previous lack of activity would mean that my legs had lost their tolerance for running, but luckily its my lungs that are giving out before my legs. And tolerance for cardio breathingwise is WAY easier to retrieve than rebuilding leg muscles that can go for hours at a time.

So my room is clean, my clothes are clean…enough, and all around I feel great. Last week of February is here. Turns out I turn 29 in a few days. Its funny how my birthday snuck up on me. Not that that is the first time this has come up before. When I turned 23 we had to bury my Grandmother on my birthday, and ever since that year there has always been something going on with everyone I know that made celebrating it difficult. Only one I really remember was when I turned 27 I had my birthday at Starkbierfest in Munich, Germany and I celebrated it with random Germans I met in the beerhall who got me drunk on beer to the point that I was actually willing to even dance. I miss Germany, and if I hadn’t joined the Peace Corps I probably would have headed back to Munich for Starkbierfest as I did last year…ah well. Sit tight Germany, only a year and a half of service remaining.

I have started to buy some beers and I have saved a box of wine and hummus that my family sent me in care packages. I think ill have the hummus on my own and then invite my fellow teachers over to my place where they can taste American wine and we can sit around yammering like all good Mongolian parties contain. Next weekend ill also drop into UB to restock and resupply and afford myself a birthday cigar (since Cubans are legal in Mongolia) but in all honesty im looking forward to the end of next week more than my birthday. Though temperatures will remain negative for probably the next two months, the end of the month of February marks the end of the winter months in Mongolia and we move on to spring. Itll be cold, but once you’ve felt -40 degrees Fahrenheit and pushed a car through the snow in it 20 degrees Fahrenheit can feel like a sauna.

Cant wait to see the hills all green again, though this winter has been everything that I ever wanted from the infamous Mongolian winters I do look forward to running without sweaters and sweatpants and being able to lounge outside with others and watch the beautiful day pass us by. In the pictures I look on about my time last summer in Erdene I still have a hard time remembering just how green it all looks when the weather is warm. Each day brings us closer to summer now.

February 22, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temerature: 28 degrees Fahrenheit…its getting hot in here!!!

Today’s Quote: “Oh I don’t know…does anyone ever really DO anything to anyone else…” –Say that whenever someone asks if you did something to someone else, it annoys the hell out of them

Interesting day. It just gets warmer and warmer outside, I spent my time after class outside running. I think it was November the last time I could run three days in a row, my legs hurt but in the way I prefer now. Some areas on the road are melting and the livestock are all scrambling for food as a layer or two of snow and ice fell off the ground.

As I was outside running I continuously told myself not to be fooled. While this weather is lovely and all theres no way in hell that we go from -30 to positive 25 permanently in under two weeks. To demonstrate just how psychic I am when I returned to my room I had gotten a txt from PC security saying a snow/sandstorm is coming through in the next few days. Still, these three days really were what the doctor ordered. The burning of a lot of sedentary stress and all around displeasure from stagnation melting away.

I had to wash up though as this evening I was required to sit through yet another one of the teacher meetings. Long and boring, and with aspects I still do not fully understand. For instance, during the meetings Bassansuren or Battarhuu will be talking on and on. Then suddenly they will stop, literally for five minutes and NOONE says or does anything. They just all stare at one another blankly. I have yet to get the courage to ask whats up…maybe they have a collective consciousness im not aware of.

So I did the math and at the end of this week I will have been in my town non stop for six weeks. That’s the longest I have been at my site including the first five and a half weeks when I had consildation drill. I got a couple packages so I am not starved for entertainment or exotic foods but it stands to be that I should likely make a trip this weekend if the sand/snowstorm is not that bad. I think the physical process of going somewhere else coupled with a hot shower would do me some good. Additionally I still need to update the old school video blogs and register for the summer marathons. Yea that would be wise.

February 23, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: 20 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “You make me so happy I never had any of you!” –Pamela

When I woke up this morning, I looked out the window and was taken by surprise. It wasent so much that it was snowing outside. Obviously I had gotten used to that by now and the weather advisory txt I had gotten said a storm/wind surge was in route. Instead it was the fact that the snow seemed so utterly foreign. Without the biting wind and bitter cold that sucked all moisture from snow and blew it to hell the snow did something you see back in the states. It gently and in clumps fell from the sky itself and went straight down to the earth above. Thought id seen it all here in Mongolia, but never a day out here wont surprise you.

Classes sucked a bit. I am no fool nor am I able to convince myself of lies to make myself feel better, which trust me ignorance is bliss. Though I am the largest and the tallest and strongest in my classrooms those are the ONLY things that are keeping the kids in many of my classes from flat out ambushing me and holding me hostage. Simply put if im not willing to do what other teachers here do then they are well aware that anything I will do is so utterly unimportant. Its like being a wolf without fangs and everyone knowing it. Looking and being are two VERY different things, and pragmatic individuals like Mongolian teenagers are fine observers of the human condition.

I will give myself some credit though. In a country where my forms of classroom management ranging from having them write ten times in English “I will keep my hands to myself” (he threw his paper at me!) to sitting in the corner (where they just get up the minute you turn around to teach the class.) These methods are flat out laughable and the other way is as common as sending a misbehaving student to the principals office (we don’t ever do that here in fact I get in trouble if I send a student FROM my class for getting into a fight) I still have yet to even consider such a possibility. You know while PC would never advise us to take advice on classroom management from our Mongolian counterparts I never actually remember them telling me NOT to do so…

I apologize for the cryptic talk, and while this blog is mine and does not represent the US govt or the Peace Corps I still wish to ensure that this blog doesn’t make waves, and is just my day to day thoughts about this crazy life I am leading here in Mongolia. Given how I am the one with the disruptive students while my fellow teachers are doing fine, I guess its me with the classroom management problem anyways.

Also as my counterpart is currently doing some kind of scout convention in UB I have been taking on all 25 classroom hours this week. Though a Teacher Trainer myself and splitting courses at a complex school even TEFL’s running an smaller towns school’s English education rarely have more than 10-12 school hours a week. Even that’s WAY longer than it sounds….trust me!!! Maybe ill call in the favor near the end of 3rd quarter at the end of March and spend a week getting pampered in UB. I mentioned last entry im overdue for a visit.

Last night I was feeling a little blue so I headed over to my sitemates place to play a few board games and to hand over some stuff he had loaned me. The game went great and for the past two and a half months I have been beating him at his own game every single time. I do recommend that all future volunteers bring along a game called “Settlers” Even the main board breaks down so the entire game can be brought over in three big ziplock bags. Might even try to buy the game from my sitemate when he brings his term of service to a close this summer. Were a week away from wrapping up February…Wow…for a whole lot of time this year is really rocketing by. Well the game went fine, and at his house he had a guest from UB, his lady friend. Least that’s the term I am putting on them, its obvious they are close enough. It was nothing I hadn’t seen before, just another one of those things that reminded me that I really am an island out here.

Several of the people I still seek counsel from have suggested that I pursue fellow volunteers in addition to the lovely ladies of Mongolia as I am single and advancing through me 20’s. Not at all a bad idea, and Mongolian women certainly are among the list of hot ladies, (relax, German girls will always hold the top of the list, followed closely by the argumentative but progressive Palestinian women I would encounter at GMU) but I am in a town of three thousand and the overwhelming majority of women are married by 20, and I am pushing 29. More still, while I have heard that it has happened I am not going to pursue an affair for simple pleasures. Putting aside moralities that actually are a big thing to me but also there’s just WAY too many dramas involved with that. Also as I am a volunteer who only leaves his town of 3 or so thousand once a month and no internet its not like I have continuous communication with many. This is not in it of itself a bad thing, it just sort of reminded me what life would be like if I weren’t in the midst of Peace Corps right now.

This is the problem with being a unreligiously affiliated person who actually stands on personal guidelines of principal. Your not being moral for some cosmic eternity of bliss but rather out of some unfinished set of ideals that lead you to believe that the long run of life is more rewarding when done in this way. It also means when you do good the only person you can really take praise from for being and doing good is yourself. This is also why I find those not particularly religious to be some of the more honest people you can come across for their good is based on themselves and not some deity of sorts. How many atheists have broken their words in treaty negotiations and so forth? Athiests not agnostics, Augustus Casesar was an agnostic not an athiest…now granted theres not that many atheists out there but still…point stands.

Turn 29 tomorrow….i guess ill take that as it goes.

February 24, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: Around 15 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “I am as old as I have ever been…AND IM LOVING EVERY MINUTE OF IT” –A mildly drunken American shouted that in a smoky bar in Germany two years ago.

Turned 29 today, im okay with it. Granted 29 is a fun number. Eldest of the fun decade right! I dunno, like I said before ever since we buried my grandmother on my birthday so many years ago birthdays have just been excused reasons to drink a bit and maybe to do something fun out if it doesn’t conflict with work schedules.

Well I show up at school and Moogi is asking me “what food are you making for your party…..one of the “charms” about my counterpart as ive mentioned before is that she doesn’t know sarcasm, but in addition she also has this feature of not bothering to remember things that annoy her. For instance, she loves American food and as an American expected me to be a chef of many of her nights of entertainment. Back in August I politely explained that I had no perquisite knowledge of American cooking abilities (I lived in NYC for the past two years for crikes sake. A cheese platter stretched me!) Moogi decided this displeased her, and instead has asked me practically on a weekly basis if I will make any American food for myself (and therefore her) Its just one of the things ive gotten used to…among many. Well today being my birthday though I decided to spoil myself by consuming my two favorite things. Wine and hummus. Both impossible to find readily in Mongolia and were lovingly shipped in by my family in care packages which after 6 weeks at my site during the winter months I am breaking out for tonight.

I have just cleaned up my apartment for god knows how many people decide to show up for this shindig of mine. I bought some garbage beer and if few enough guests come or enough of them bring their own alcohol I may teach them how to do a power hour drinking game. Given we are only a week from Tsagen Tsar I would like to avoid vodka tonight if at all possible. Given its my birthday…ill give that a 50-50 shot. Ill save a birthday cigar for this weekend when I go to UB.

You have no idea how small you can feel until you find yourself scraping hummus out of a can and trying to figure out how to open a box of wine in a Mongolian apartment on your 29th birthday for Peace Corps service. When you live in the here and now you find out just how unique every day is huh? Alright, ill add on a postcript after whatever type of party I have ends.

29 years old…spending the remainder of my 20’s in Mongolia and in Peace Corps service. Didn’t see it coming, but now I cant imagine it any other way…I like that.

February 25, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperatue: -2 Fahrenheit Was nice while it lasted.

Today’s Quote: “Never underestimate the power of negativity” –A professor once told me that

I gotta say ladies and gentlemen, last night might be a good enough reason for me to reconsider this lack of desire to throw a party for my birthday. One by one my neighbors friends and fellow teachers dropped in. I had more people in my room yesterday than I have had people over at every other time combined. Not too shabby indeed. They liked the hummus, and when I explained the bean that hummus comes from got a real kick out of the name. You see, garbanzo literally sounds the same as “gar” (hand) “banzo” (excitement) and therefore in a language that literally just says what it is the word garbanzo in Mongolia means masturbation. Waka Waka Waka!!!

But seriously the party went well, and everyone went home happy and drunk. I have some great pictures too of some of our escapades, including when my counterpart took a swing at my sitemate. I think that’s a Christmas card worthy picture to tell the truth. Today is the painstaking job of putting my place back together after the party. They didn’t like the wine as much as I thought they would. I think it had something to do with it just being too damn strange, especially coming out of the box it did. Well I liked it, so the important people were covered.

The rest of today will be dedicated to a run and getting stuff ready for my UB trip tomorrow. Though today I was well fed on leftover hummus and peanut butter it will be nice to eat something pizza like in a few days. A late birthday present to myself if that makes any sense. The cold is back, but as I had prepared myself for such an outcome its not all bad. Its still running weather and the wind/snow/sand storm never materialized. Each day brings me closer to warmer weather, in theory anyway.

February 26, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: No idea, but im in a heated building and had a hot shower so no matter

Today’s Quote: “The great thing about being smart is that you can achieve a lot without really doing anything.” –Community

Well im showered and shaved and comphy in UB. I went to Nayras café and found the internet to be slow so I just updated some emails to family before returning to my guesthouse. Now all I need to do is get some chilling going on on a comphy mattress. Ill update more on tomorrows blog. Today I feel like just sitting and relaxing. Take care all!

February 27, 2010. Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

No time for a quote. Got a little to write here. Unlike last month I seem to be the only PCV not stationed in UB to actually be in UB this weekend. No worries, that’s nothing a little hostel cant cure. Sure enough last night I met a Spaniard, two French girls and an black guy born in America who has been living in Sweeden for the past 20 years. Gods I love hostels. There fun and don’t know the city, so tonight ill take em on a semi-beer crawl to some of the finer establishments we have in the city. Though I consider myself pretty fearless the most common robberies have the following combo. 1)Alone 2)Alcohol 3)At Night. Yea 2 of the 3 are hard to avoid…but I gotta be able to find a group to wander with. No worries, im not taking us off the beaten path either.

Nice to meet an interesting group of bodies to travel with. You get the feeling that fate and an invisible hand is bringing you together. Also everyones got interesting stories and whatnot. Just a good way to spend my time in UB this weekend.

February 28, 2010 Ulaanbaatar, Mongolia.

No time to talk, and the internet is slow today. Had a great weekend, but as always its time to head back to the land of potatoes and cold shaving. Pictures come next month when I have some better internet. All the best everyone!

January 20, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia

Today’s Temperature -33 degrees Fahrenheit (its official ladies and gentlemen…THIS is a Zuud!)

Today’s Quote: “IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT?!?!?” – Josh Jacobs

Good week off! So on Friday I headed into UB. It was seminal, as I sat in the meeker waiting for the inevitable 50 or so other people to show up and flood the van something probably once in a lifetime happened. Nobody came! Literally a meeker built to hold 15 (that usually holds 30) was empty around the time we were to go. And go we did…in an EMPTY van!!! Click went the camera.

So the weekend in UB was everything I needed. Got to update the blog, got the English resource book that my counterpart has been whining so profusely over. Bought new minutes on my phone card and got a phone card for a particular task I will do tomorrow morning. I got to talk to my mom and sister on skype as well as send some particularly useful calls out to some people I was overdue to sending. In essence I got a month of cosmopolitan chores under wraps. Well done indeed. My mother, like most peace corps mothers is an avid blog reader. My mother is always on the look out for signs of sadness or depression, and everytime I then see her on Skype I have to assure her that I am not in fact depressed. My blog has become the new away messages I used to put up on AIM. To me they were quirky ways of relaying quotes or thought processes at the time, my mother saw them as cries for help. Much as she finds my VERY rare annoyed or sad blogs to be a sign that I am in mortal misery. I do admit the end all solution would be to simply NOT post the very rare blog where I express anger or sadness, but personally I rather like to see those additions. They give this blog a sense of true realism. The idea that we go through a month without any days of difficulty or hardship no matter who we are or what we do is utter nonsense. So ill keep writing what comes to my mind on that particular day…..BUT NO MOM IM NOT DEPRESSED!

There was one bad bit of news that had made its way to me by the time I reached the city. I kept in under wraps from previous blogs because to my knowledge it wasent common knowledge at the time and I didn’t want to be out of place in giving the news. My good buddy Matthew, who I had known and been friends with since Los Angeles California when I met this grouchy but amusing banjo carrying dude I decided to befriend is no longer a Peace Corps Volunteer. This REALLY bummed me out. He was the second of the three cynics. Now hes gone and theres noone but me of the three with over a year and a half of service to go! Egads!!! Well when I got to the Peace Corps office this weekend I found he had left me the tab he owed from a steak dinner I had comped him for with a single note so very Matthew style: “Go buy your own dammned steak now!” I know this must suck for Matthew but I really do think he will be alright. Chin up buddy, youll be alright! Another fellow M20 volunteer decided to bail that I knew pretty well and liked. I think time and weather are starting to have their effect on some.

Anyways, then I did what I always do in the city, and drank many beers in the company of those I can have ridiculous conversations with. Theres a gang of M19’s I keep seeming to connect with in UB (who are mainly Tripp’s friends but I actually do feel quite welcome and liked by the group) I discovered a few new drinking holes that I like with good beer and then we even ended up at an apartment in UB which an M19 occupies playing low stakes Texas Hold Em. I gambled a lot and lost a lot, and it was all so utterly totally worth it. I spent so very very very much money and I have officially decided not to care about anymore. How relaxing to have such an option.

Then on Monday I teamed up with an M19 named Julia who lives over at my old training town of Erdene. It was high time I dropped in on my family for a visit. As sitting around after talking for so long would be awkward I had asked if Julia could put me up for the night which she so easily could. So that settled everything and I made my way out. On our way out our security advisor told us that the Zuud expected to come in over the end of the week may be reaching us by Monday night. Nothing for it and already committed, we made the 2 ½ hour bus ride back to the town I trained at. It looked so different now….it was covered in snow instead of being bright green!

Well I drop my stuff down and head to the edge of town where my moms house is. Lotta emotions, but none of them feeling all that bad, the next few hours sorted them out. I got to the house mid afternoon and find that a freaking ger now is planted in the middle of the yard! Given how empty the yard had seemed before it seemed so very out of place, but then I figured that some of the neighbors not as fortunate as my well off mother may be needing some help, especially during the hard winter we are having (more on the winter later)

So the only family member that is home is my brother Gambert, who is also in the middle of work (there picking up some large machinery piece in the yard) but he makes me tea and asks about my town. We had spoken so very little during training, given how I couldn’t say anything in Mongolian and he couldn’t say anything in English we both simply acknowledged politely one anothers existence and went about our business. This time it all seemed different. I could talk to him…in detail!...about how I had been faring, and now we could even joke about our lifestyles with one another.

As he was the hardest to communicate with and I was doing so beautifully, it was the ego boost of the lifetime…which was especially effective an hour later when my mother walked through the door. I tell ya, though a tad stoic my mother was by far the sweetest and most decent mother any gratefuless bugger such as myself could ever luck out having for a parent in Peace Corps service, and on that day I think I proved to her how her patience and help months before had benefitted me. We spoke perfect Mongolian with one another…I was amazing even myself how well I could communicate. There was nothing I couldn’t express about my life, my job, my town and new friends. I even could describe to her that the lack of buses during Tsagen Tsar is the ONLY reason I would not find myself at Erdene during the three day holiday. I even got a laugh from my stoic mother when I told her winter is my favorite season (because all the insane flies are dead!!!) We drank tea and bonded as we always did, and I even helped out now and again out in the yard with the animals (which are covered in extra furs so they don’t freeze to death)

My sister came through the door last, and she had just cut her hair to swim team length. It was rather amusing when the thought “oh my goofy sister…” ran through my head as I saw her. She seemed pleased at my Mongolian and my sister and mom ganged up on me and demanded that I come for Tsagen Tsar next month. I told them I would really try, but we are towns apart and travel during the holiday is next to impossible. Well as night approached I retreated to Julia’s Ger. It was my first night ever sleeping in a ger, and I gotta say. Theres no part of ger living in the winter that I don’t think ill mind. Its far too much to explain here, but a ger is either the temperature it is outside, or around 80 degrees depending on if you have a fire going. Ill be curious how often I heat my place. Sleeping is interesting though because you start the night in boxers and by the end you got both pairs of wool socks on with two layers of everything and sleeping in your sleeping bag. That was the first night I had ever used my sleeping bag. That things fracking comphy!

But the night passed quickly and the next morning after going to my moms house for buuz (buuz at 10am…ugh. But she makes delicious food and I had promised) I got in a meeker and headed back to UB. In UB I further wrapped up some chores and did a final night of beer drinking (gotta open a cheap wine bar in this country!) I headed back….but on that second time in UB the Zuud came.

As I said before, snow doesn’t so much fall from the sky in this country than get blown fiercely by the winds. Now in UB this is not all that bad because the buildings do a great job of blocking the gales that exist around there. But the cold had hit, and on this morning when I left for the black market to get to the meeker that heads to Bagakhangai I had found the Zuud had arrived. Sitting in an absolutely crammed Meeker we headed to the town in slow fashion after getting beyond city limits. Nothing to block the wind out here, and the snow on the ground blew over slowly all the roads, making knowledge of if we were even always ON the road a little iffy. True proof of my assimilation of the culture was how I simply closed my eyes and left it to the Sky Father and Earth Mother to see me home safely. The trip had some scary moments as we traveled straight into nothing but white haze that had about 10 feet of visibility, but there was a crescendo, or precipice of events for the day/year so to speak.

You see the snow is constantly moving, so piles of snow are rare. You need a certain circumstance of the curve of a road followed by a particular hill pattern to find large thick amounts of snow on the ground in any one place, which is actually helpful because otherwise the roads would be covered in snow for 8 months of the year. Well about halfway home we came across a large pile. Nothing for it…we had to plow through it. So he got a head of steam and plowed in….and we got stuck. We made it about halfway through 20 yards of foot deep packed snow. The van couldn’t go forward or backwards. Miles from the nearest GER, no AAA, buried in snow and its -30 degrees Fahrenheit. Like so many of the things we end up doing, we didn’t really have any other viable options. The women all sat in the car while me and the other men (about ten of us aged 18-80) got out. Some were wearing winter dells, some had Mongolian business suits on, (I had my jeans, winter coat and hat, no gloves) and ALL of us just started to dig….in -30…with no shovels….and our bare hands.

We were at it for nearly an hour, we needed to back the van up to try and plow again. In all that time no vehicle came near us either. It was the coldest I had ever felt in my time in Mongolia. My hands were frantically having blood pumped into them by my body fighting with all its effort NOT to frostbite as I dug them into deep snow and threw it aside, my fingernails centimeters from frantically spinning tires. I was shivering ten minutes into the work. The snow still stinging the sides of our faces as the winds howled on and we all worked with this dry and sand sized snow. White faces/beards and hair streaks were all growing. But noone was angry…we were all grinning and looking at each other. I remember seeing one of the older guys wearing a Del, who had ice all in his beard and a snot icicle coming from his nose. He gave me a two mittened thumbs up as we dug along the right tire wheel. It all was happening as though this were one of those wild country stories you never think exist….Then it happened….

We had been at it for an hour, we had removed enough of the thick snow and had gotten the vehicle to back up some. We had dug out some of the snow ahead and ten yards deeper the snow receded and we all gathered behind the van to give it one final hard push through the tough stuff. By this point we were all getting REALLY cold. Touching the van brought no sensation to my hands whatsoever as the men gathered their strength and one shouted “NEG….HOERRR…..GOORRREENNN!!!!” (one two three duh) and we all started to push.

The van moved, EVER so slowly the whole ten yards through the thick snow. Our will testing the most powerful winter I have ever encountered in my life. As I sat there with my side against a vehicle pushing I had a perspective moment where I realized that even if we got the van through (which was a BIG if) we were accomplishing relatively so very little. We were moving a van through around 20 yards of snow and were still around an hour from our destination. There was going to be no warm hut for us to enter to recover our strength from this ordeal and I was not sure at that point if my hands were going to be alright. Here I was giving everything and I was accomplishing so utterly little, and for some reason every endless and seemingly pointless struggle I had ever gone through or ever will go through seemed to be there with me at that point. I started to realize just how remarkable even some of mankinds greatest failures are, let alone success. I realized that its never about what you’ve done or will do…its about what you gave in the endeavor. I also thought back to all the times I had snorted at the Mongolian winter concept being daunting. I remember all the times that I had snickered at how easily I seemed to take the cold. And there I was in the middle of nowhere, pushing a van through snow that threatened to bring us to a stop here in the middle of a massive blizzard and I tripped as we came inches to the finish with two of the Mongolians landing atop of me and as I rose my head up with all of our hands still pushing the van even though we were down in the snow…I had that moment…

The van was spinning its wheels like mad, and as I looked up the tires were blowing massive amounts of snow directly into my face as the rest of my body was buried in the snow on the road already. I know how staged this sounds but I swear to all the gods people believe in this to be true….i looked on all of this, and saw not only the Mongolian winter testing my previous gall but every other endurance trial I have and will come across in life as snow continued to splatter my face and nonexistent hands anymore and I gave the bumper all the strength I could find and I screamed in English at the top of my lungs “IS THAT THE BEST YOU GOT!?!?!”

Two seconds later the van jumped twice and the next second reached the cleared off section of the road ahead. You would think that this would have brought me and my fellow laborers to celebrate, but we didn’t. Maybe we were all just too damn cold, but the second we were free we raced back into the meeker and did our best to warm our bodies. I was more worried about my hands and took off my coat and immediately stuck my hands into my armpits. At first I was worried, but little by little feeling returned. I looked over at my fellow dig out crew, most still with snow and ice on their face like mine and while we didn’t celebrate we patted each other on the back and smiled at how ridiculous we all looked. The women looked on at us with amused impress. Its at a time like that that a Kodak moment seems so appropriate, but in retrospect I realize that a camera could never have gotten the perfect shot of our toil to accomplish something so utterly miniscule in scale. I say that the greatest moments of our lives don’t get their pictures taken….but we have some pretty damn amazing moments let me tell you.

We got back to town shortly after and I threw my stuff down and fell asleep under my blanket for a good two hours before I woke up to write about as much that has happened this week that I can still remember. What a day, what a world, what a life. I love this country, I love the Peace Corps, I love this life….you got to remember days like these, because today…life is good.

January 21, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -28 degrees Fahrenheit, but the wind is around the same number of miles per hour. Its absolutely brutal!!!

Today’s Theme Song: “Beat the Drums” by Jab We Met

Wow. The wind is REALLY picking up the pace. Seriously outside today the wind was strong enough to cause me to walk at a slant when I went to go get some supplies from the delguur today. On a day where its like that outside I did what any self respecting volunteer would do. Threw a blanket over myself, put on another layer of socks, and spent the day eating beef jerkey from a care package my dear sweet aunt sent me and watched some of the new video clips I got on my computer.

Ive decided to spend more classes showing the kids some film clips from my computer. I got hold of some sesame street clips from Youtube and I also wanted to show them a few cartoons I have been holding onto as well. I think we can make a project out of translating what is said in the cartoons as some of them have very little translated at all.

I really wish you could hear what it sounds like outside. For a man like myself who really wanted to know what a Mongolian winter feels like I seemed to have gotten my wish. Volunteers and friends of volunteers who have been in Mongolia for over five years report to me that this has been the harshest winter to date. Already felt pretty good about how well I had adapted to the Mongolian winter, that just made a good feeling feel better. It also means that with no scientific background to this claim whatsoever it does probably mean next winter may not be quite as harsh either.

Tomorrow I think I will try for some exercise. All this jerky has given me an abundance of energy which I spent the day sitting under a blanket keeping warm with. Good gods people its cold outside.

Oh, final cool note I forgot to mention. I was looking up marathon runs in Mongolia when I was in UB earlier this week. I knew of two, one in the Gobi desert around September, and another was an ultra hike marathon taking place at the lake to the north. I was on board with both, but I found something especially cool. Come June 5th there is the first ever internationally recognized marathon taking place in Mongolia. Is this one on some distant and impossible to reach hillside? Not at all…its right in UB. Good gods that’s perfect. Its mostly flat in UB, and in June the weather in this country is PERFECT for a marathon. That will get me fired up and ready for the hill marathon at the lake up north in mid July, and then I get a rest until September and wrap them all up with a marathon run in the Gobi desert. You really cant get a more diverse set of runs over the summer time then that huh? Better keep limber this winter, and I better break out the long weekend runs this Spring. I brought it up to fellow volunteers, seeing if I could get anyone to run it with me, but they seem a little shy. Not sure they could get 26 miles in. I wish they could see me when I had been 23 years old, I was not the runner I am today, and in a years time I did my first marathon quite well in fact. (hell most of the people I talk to ARE 23 years old right now!)

January 22, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -26 Fahrenheit, with a similar wind from yesterday

Today’s Quote: “Remember today little brother, because today…life is good” –Boromir

This day was much like the one before me. It was too cold for anyone to be outside for prolonged periods of time and so I made the most of it with my time in my room. I looked over the English resource guide book copy that I had been given by the incredibly hard workers at the Peace Corps office. As always, I believe there to be some kind of worldwide conspiracy where certain days of my life have been erased by the Men in Black because there is no way in freaking hell that I was given a booklet like this and I just discarded it or forgot about it. Remember what I said about a healthy dose of paranoia?

As always I made an excuse to go outside despite the temperatures. I dropped off a bag of beef jerkey along with my other garbage and as I was walking to the garbage dump the dogs went absolutely stir crazy. I threw the bag at the last second the final 15 yards to the pile to ensure that the dogs would not accidently bite me in a frenzied rage. With the scent of dried meat off me I was able to get the soda bottles thrown into the mix as well. Fun story about the soda bottles. Due to the price of coke I buy only the Mongolian brand of cola. It tastes like garbage and likely has almost no caffeine in it but as ive stressed before my experiences with food comes down to tastes and not all around satisfaction from foods and drinks. Well the bottles are literally just for Mongolia and bottled in UB. The manufacture date is stamped right on the bottle and its quite a treat to look at one of these labels and to realize that the soda was literally made less than a week ago and now im drinking it. Very vintage pleasing!

The rest of the day was spent watching some of the new video files I procured from my fellow volunteers during the previous weekend spent in UB. This winter will NOT drive me mad with boredom if I can help it. Tomorrow I will read the Tom Clancy “Splinter Cell” novel that my dear sweet Aunt sent me. I may not know all the plots from before, but I did play the game one time and have the voices for the main characters locked in my head.

Aside from that I spent the day as before curled up in a blanket trying to fight the cold. My hair is all poofy because its been washed as it always is right after I go to UB. I imagine that when I get a week of time here more dirt/sand/grime will help keep my hair down as it has before. Who would have thought CLEANING my hair could bring about repercussions. Last night I had a freaky flashback dream to when I was a kid and I got into arguments with my dad about how many times a week a grown man (I was 13) needed to bathe. It figures I only agree with his assessment once I move to a climate and enviroment where that is not a possibility. Go fig. Alright, im off to watch an episode of some conspicuous TV show. Maybe ill see if my Russian “Cheating Lovers” show is on! All the best.

January 24, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: About -20 Fahrenheit and a wind so strong I cant WALK outside!

Today’s Quote: “Well it’s a test, and seeing as the room is setup arena style and no number 2 pencils have been provided I imagine it’s a fight to the death.” –Spike

I really cant stress how impossible the weather in this country is to fathom. Today outside there is not a cloud in the sky. The sun is beating down on us like the giant orb that it is. None of this is uncommon, but today its windy. Windy to the point that I couldn’t walk. Seriously I had to crouch down and shuffle to the food store today because I was literally being pulled off the ground when I stood a certain way. Its not snowing, but with that much wind and the dry snow all it does is throw it around as I walk. Absolutely incredible. I feel like I must be stoned with how much I talk about the incredible weather!

Well last day of being completely lazy. Tomorrow I pack up my back and head to school for the start of the third quarter. For the best really, I miss work, especially because I cant exercise. As usual when I am lazy that’s when I get the most ambitious for running but right now I am weighing options and wondering if I truly have what it takes to run an ultra-marathon. The race goes from sunrise to sunset and I dunno but I really think I could go 50 miles in a day if I knuckled down my training in the spring. I figure in a months time…February is the last month of winter and while Spring is still very cold I figure we will be back in the 20 degree Fahrenheit weather and ill be able to get a run in everyday then. Five miles a day on weekdays, and progressively longer one day of the weekend. I can go fifty miles in a day right? Next UB trip I gotta sign up for these. Some of them have offices in UB and im gonna go to them and sign up to make matters easier. Damn its windy outside!

January 26, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: Around -25 degrees Fahrenheit. Bloody wind

Today’s Quote: “What if they come through another door?” –A Rebellion soldier just before stormtroopers cut through the door in front of him

Busy past couple of days. Not a whole lot of teaching but as always I find the other things I do in Peace Corps service to be the real heart of the matter. So yesterday we didn’t have school (something about extension of 3rd quarter break.) and instead we met to see the new schedule and get caught up with one another. I liked it. I had spent a few too many days in my room watching new goofy video files I had borrowed from fellow volunteers. Got to see everyone and show them me as well.

Then I got a ring on my phone. Almost noone calls in Mongolia, txting is simply way too cheaper and I don’t know enough people who can communicate effectively with me over a phone. So while the list of suspects as to who was calling me was limited, I was especially surprised to see that none other than my country director Jim Carl was gracing me with his time! So I pick up the phone and apparently I am overdue for a site visit and the Country Director HIMSELF is making the appearance!!! HOW COOL IS THAT!?! Oh hang on it gets better. Now he is also bringing along the man who is on the cover of my cookbook. The chief med officer himself! Ill keep his name a secret though just cause I don’t know if that needs to be known by everyone. Paul for a first name.

But I say again….two VERY high level administrators of Peace Corps Mongolia are dropping in on me! Naturally I was a little anxious just because I had no clue why I would merit such high level drop ins, but Jim Carl assures me that it’s a routine visit so theres nothing to worry about at all. Good enough for me…and again so very very cool. Better clean up my place and roll out the red carpets. Break out the green tea instead of the black tea!

So to end yesterday as a cool day I found out that a town hall meeting had been called for the evening. Apparently it was an appraisal of public service projects that had been installed or enacted last year and proposals for new projects this year. I even was coerced to vote on getting blood work testers available inside the town. It was hardly necessary though, the entire community seemed to want this above all other things! Still, I liked watching how the crowd interacted with them. It gave color to a lot of what I consider to be very subtle politics. The Mongolian socialism is far different than other models of socialism I have seen.

So often when we think of socialism people believe that it is the government that controls all things. While true unlike other more corrupt national governments one thing I noticed about Mongolian socialism is that it is grass roots. Everyone is involved, and when everyone is involved that means that EVERYONE is the government in their own unique way. I am not advocating socialism/communism any more than any government here, I am simply saying that much like the United States and The United Kingdom both have the same form of government, the differences become very apparent when you actually live and experience it. Cool civics way of ending the day.

Today on the other hand started off teaching. I was all set with lessons for the four classes I teach on Tuesday and we had even gotten off to a flying start at 9am. The students had been out of school for a week and were craving some amphoric letter writing and I had a juicy one for them. I wrote on the blackboard about “my house” You know….i live in an apartment/house/ger with my family/alone. I have three rooms, in these rooms are….and so on. Great use of the vocab their trying to master, sentence structure, writing about something they know. Win win win, right?

Well just when I am about to tell the first class that they should start to write their own house down in their books my neighbor and boss the training manager walks in and starts to address the students. This happens now and again, and I will say that while it’s the hardest to understand Mongolian when it is not being spoken to you, I am getting better at it because after he finished I got the official translation from Moogi, which made a ridiculous idea fact….”we are not having school today…we need to shovel snow!” ….I LOVE THIS COUNTRY! Not sarcastic. How cool is that?

Last night the wind blew pretty hard, that special circumstance where the direction of the wind and the location of the snow synced up with the 5km long road between Bagakhangai and Ondortolge. It was bad…so bad that Mongolian drivers couldn’t get across….thats freaking bad!!!! Well I was told to get out of teaching gear and into snow shoveling clothes. By 10:00am we were walking past the air force base on top of a foot of ice/snow burying the road underneath. 5 freaking kilometers. No snow machines, no machinery at all. Picks, pikes, shovels and bare hands….did I ever mention I am the owner of two masters degrees and a state certificiation for teaching in the state of Virginia???…nowhere else id rather be. I got to work…

…along with the entire town for that matter. They shut down the school so all the kids could assist with digging, and all the other departments brought their tools to help shovel as well. Its an amazing sight to see 2000 people collectively digging snow. All I could keep thinking was (whose in town?) Good thing im not a burglar! But seriously everyone was out there. Governors and government officials, social workers, drivers, water station, power station, cops, teachers, students and a skinny white guy who found one of the coolest jobs in the world. As snow has blanketed the roads the past couple of weeks exercise has eluded me. Being able to dig was a decent alternative.

Freezing cold, biting winds, wearing only jeans and my winter jacket and working with roughly a foot of pretty much ice. Imagine this in America….you cant! It doesn’t exist. We barely clear OUR driveway, let alone roads. We hire people in the government to do that, its not OUR problem. Here the mentality of community and being a part of it is not an option. Whether you use it or not, the communitys problem IS your problem. So for roughly 5 hours we dug. I loved it, got to bond more with the teachers (who I dug along side with) and while we didn’t clear 5 km, we got enough so that rides could take the more exhausted or freezing workers back to the two towns at the end of it.

I got back to my room after all of it and the strange thing is that after I got back inside, had some water, changed into clothes not drenched in ice chips and sweat and sitting in my bed, it was only then that my body began to shiver. I think I have one of those metabolisms that burns me hot like a furnace (hence the sweating when its 60 degrees) so for five hours my body kept even the bitter cold at bay while my counterparts all wondered how I was surviving without long underwear and three layers of pants on (they think my leg hair is amazing btw) but when I got back to my room I think my body shut the furnace off and all of it flooded on to me. Kinday cool….ah hell the whole day was cool…EVERY day is cool out here. Didn’t teach, and instead I shoveled snow… welcome to the Peace Corps. (seriously though M21’s pack the warm stuff because the Mongolians were shivering today! That’s saying something)

January 27, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -24 degrees Fahrenheit. (wind go away! I want to run!)

Today’s Theme Song: “Save Tonight” By Eagle Eye Cherry (great song to sing at night when driving home from a day spent working at a movie theatre. Not that I know anything about that)

Frankly speaking I am not sure if my counterparts are grasping the idea of “Team Teaching” I know we regimented some of the classes into I teach this one and you teach that one, but the whole TEAM teaching is hard to get past them. Preplanning an assignment that isint writing things on the board for the students to copy verbaitum is where I seem to lack the vocabulary necessary to explain how I am trying to get us to teach at the same time and together. Sigh….i can see how this might be a little annoying. But then I just think back to my time teaching in the American public school system. I think a great way to battle the frustration some TEFL teachers have with a lack of progress is to have experienced the same circumstances but with even more resources at their disposal.

More still today is the day I teach the 7th graders. I had asked Moogi to remain in the classroom as her presence (and the potential of her classroom management skills) can keep the class tame enough for me to teach a lesson. Well today though I was in all of her classes she saw fit to leave me with around 40 of the roudiest kids youll ever meet. I got better at controlling them but it still wasent pretty.

I have been doing some research and found out why this grade may be so particularly difficult. This is part Education Masters Degree and part logic, so bear with me. 7th graders are about twelve years old or so. Mongolian kids I don’t think completely align with the student development theory that is so widely used in Western schools. I think if Piaget or Kohlberg had observed Mongolian students in action they would have changed their tunes. In essence, students in the Mongolian school system have key difference from other education systems I have been in. To begin with, they don’t…cant fail. Seriously some don’t bring notebooks to school, never speak, don’t learn a single thing, and leave with a diploma. I choose what to get upset over and I let this one slide. In essence the argument for not failing them is that if you fail them they will leave the school system, and the rebuttal that if there not learning anyway then whats the point is lost for understandable reasons.

The other has to do with the playground lessons of Mongolian life. As I said, Mongolian’s are family based in both life and discipline. The concept of “using your words” or “keeping your hands to yourself” falls through. How many of us didn’t beat the crap out of one another as sibilings when we were kids? Well that was all well and good, but in the West we are often taught NOT to behave this way to those in our community. Mongolians have the mentality that the community IS the family, and so the rules of the house apply everywhere and to everyone. When a twelve year old takes a swing at you for breaking up a fight he was having with someone else, you learn that Mongolian students know from a VERY early age that there is no teachers to protect you. Someone doesn’t like you and wants to beat you up, you can either gather your posse and fight, or you can back down. Usually they will fight, even if they know they will lose. Saving face…losing at least means you were willing to fight. This may explain the lack of geeks in this country, especially among men. I try to imagine myself in my early days being raised in a culture like this….Sky Father protect me!

Anyway, so the students don’t have the subtlety of Western students who use tact to defeat their bullies or to outwit their adversaries. Instead they honorably fight one another, and take their lumps when needed. But the need for work and employment may also explain what happens to students once you get past 7th grade.

Seventh graders are also the most numerous of all grades. As you go up in grades the number of students dwindle, especially among men. The idea being that you cant exactly “fail” in the Mongolian school system so ageing alone assures you can advance to the next grade, but some students/families who know their student has no University ambitions don’t exactly see the point in educating themselves.

I don’t see this as being ignorant as much as I see pragmatism which I so prevalently see in Mongolian lifestyle. If its seen as useful Mongolians will learn the hell out of just about anything, but if I am the only person in their town that speaks English why exactly should he learn it would be the mentality many students and families have. I have rebuttals to that argument, but theres only so much a PCV can or even should do… anyways…

So after 7th grade some students leave the education system and either mess around, or start working. Labor, learning to drive, water and power station errand boys, in essence they begin to take up apprenticeships in their community. The classroom numbers dwindle, making classes easier to control but also the only students remaining in these years WANT to be in school and therefore are paying attention and working hard.

Just to be clear, I am not ripping either Mongolian or Western school systems or students here. Its just after a period of time in which I thought I was doing something wrong I have begun to rationalize how the difference between the mentality of the students may be the barrier that I am so often encountering. Ill keep an eye on these observations. Would be a great doctorate thesis for education one day huh?

Well after school I started cleaning up my apartment a little. Nothing too extensive, just sweeping the floor and taking out a load of garbage. My last site visit went pretty well and I just want to be sure since I have the higher ups showing up that I make a good impression, but I like the two guys showing up and they seem to know me despite the number of volunteers they must encounter on a daily or so basis. I cant quite stress how flattered I am by their recognition of me each time. The chief med guy is impressive simply because I haven’t even gotten sick in my entire Peace Corps service (not counting puking up bad NON-mongolian foods!) As for Jim Carl, maybe im flattered just because I think the guy is just so damn cool. Hes my Dumbledore of sorts, and to answer your next question yes someone left a copy of Harry Potter 7 in the PC library and I have been reading it of late.

Enough of all that, im off to eat. Cyas!

January 28, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -25 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Just remember, if im not back in one hour. You take this ship…and you come and rescue me!” – Malcolm Reynolds.

Well the place is in order (as if it isint always!) and I am filtering the last of my bottles so that I can put on the idea that at all times my apartment has clean filtered water ready for drinking and the floor is always swept. Actually I was rather proud with how clean my room already was. I do have a pile of clothes that could use an all around wash, but I figure that’s usually a weekend chore, and it gives the room the look of a bachelor pad, which I undoubtedly am!

Rather excited to see the two of them tomorrow. My sitemate Tripp is apparently gonna see if he can leech a ride to UB with the country director and doc tomorrow. For a moment I was pondering if I should go to UB with a free trip and all, but I decided against it. Its only been a couple weeks since I was last in UB, and the package with video games would not have arrived yet. So in essence if I went to UB now it would just be an excuse for me to spend money, and in all honesty a quiet weekend sounds rather nice, so ill stick around.

The wind is REALLY picking up these days. Today it was bright and sunny but you couldn’t see more than ten feet because the damn wind kept a constant whirl of snow all around me. Literally you look up and see the cloudless sky but everything else is just pure haze. I want to run!!!!! Me want run!!! Waaahhh! Another month and through pure hope I think that while it will still be freezing outside, it will be acceptable to pound pavement. Which gives me three months to get into marathon shape, and four and a half months to get into ultra-marathon mode. Let me run!

January 29, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -30 degrees Fahrenheit….bleh

Today’s Quote: “Go forth and sin boldly!” –Martin Luther (ya gotta love a monk with a sense of humor)

Well the visit was quite grand. Jim Carl and Paul the doc showed up all dressed warm and cozy. I showed them inside and gave them the tour of my apartment. After those ten seconds were up we proceeded to rant for a few hours about day to day life and how things were going. I told them how I was doing and everything seemed all smiles. From what I can gather they think I am doing fine out here and I agree with them. Yehaw! I got a good picture of them too, ill be sure to post it.

It was amusing to reminisce with two guys who were former volunteers and made a career working for Peace Corps and various other Aid organizations. Its an obvious career possibility for me, and the work seems quite interesting obviously. Jim Carl seemed to especially understand my appreciation of being off the grid being in a town where I do not have daily or even weekly access to the internet and the world of information that comes with that. As a man who lives in UB and has immense responsibilities he does not have such off the grid abilities but mentioned that that disconnect from the world news that people have in the states without even realizing it was something he enjoyed very much during his two years of Peace Corps service, and like I said I agree that its refreshing as well. A quick visit to the school and an exchange of pleasantries was all it took to conclude the meeting. It was obvious that Jim Carl had quite a few volunteers to see, and I don’t blame em. Given the colds and winds outside almost all outside business should be as brief as possible.

The rest of the day was spent doing a little writing and watching the movie Luther. If I know my actors correctly, the guy who plays Luther in the move “Luther” was the homicidal nazi friend of Schindler in “Schindler’s List” Hes much nicer when hes not a Nazi! As far as religious movies go its probably one of the better ones out there. As usual its dusted up and makes Luther into something he was not, but I liked what they did with the characters. Sorta a more boring version of Dan Brown, and when things get boring in movies the more and more likely your getting a movie into being something close to historically accurate (see “The New World” for an accurate demonstration of how boring and accurate align most often)

I can begin to understand now why they said that people beg for the end of the winter. Its not the cold that bothers me at all. In fact I love the cold in some ways, but with the wind as strong as it is I cannot run or even spend more than fifteen or so minutes outside. Damn shame… I wanna run!

January 30, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -15 Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “I got a jar of dirt! I got a jar of dirt!” –Jack Sparrow

So after typing up last nights blog I got a call from Moogi to get my ass over to the school “its time for teachers day party!” You gotta love Mongolias love for teachers. Teachers salaries are the second highest paying career in Mongolia (behind businessmen) and teachers definitely like to party. They have one day a year on February 1st called teachers day when the teachers dress up like students and the students teach the class. I will say that there are large periods of time in which I am a tad bored, but then Mongolia does something like this, and it all becomes a riot. Anyway’s, that’s the cute stuff, but the fun stuff is that its an excuse for everyone in the community that is or was a teacher to party all out. And party we did.

The feast as usual was amazing. Fruit of all sorts, good buuz and some all around amusing singing. I tried to show them how to do Cotton Eye Joe but noone in this country seems to get how to do solitary dancing, so I imagine they thought I was encountering some wild drunken flailing…which I wasent!

Then there was the booze as well. Dang teachers in this country can drink! I did my best to walk the fine line of drinking enough to demonstrate my integration and general merriment, but not getting drunk enough to make a moron out of yourself. I walk that line very well btw! No wonder drinking alone in this country is a sign of depression, drinking in large groups is way more amusing.

Well I am spending the day today trying to let my body balance itself out and to relaxing. I haven’t played my video games in the past three weeks and that may be a good way to pass the time this evening. Its getting a little less windy outside, I figure if it gets just a few degrees warmer I may try for a run tomorrow. My legs scream for punishment!

January 31, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -10 Fahrenheit

Today’s Theme Song: “You’re the Best” –Karate Kid Soundtrack (another good running song)

Got up and the sun was out and the wind was minimal. It was now or not for another month, so I layered up and before I could talk myself out of it headed out the door and out for a run. I am losing my speed and strength. Too many months now and not enough sporadic running is taking its toll on me. I got to around three miles before calling it quits. I may find winter in Mongolia a fascinating thing, but its gonna destroy my finish times for that marathon in June. Ill only have about three months of training prior to that given how cold February is turning out to be.

You may have noticed that I look upon the cold temperatures and remark about how cool I find living in such weather, but please don’t think im a sociopath in realizing that for the millions of people living in this country don’t think this is cool. Many people do not have my accommodations, or income, or tolerance to cold, or family to support and cold weather makes this a MUCH harder living experience than I am going through. Please be aware that I am aware of this and realize this...

…but then I read a newspaper yesterday that put the cold of this winter into perspective. There is a Mongolian Times newspaper I sometimes get from the school and read so I can practice my Mongolian, but they also have a few columns in English as well. The newspaper said that this winter has officially been designated a Zuud. No surprise there, but what I read next truly shook me. Meteorologists are now saying that this winter is the harshest winter Mongolia has ever experienced in over 30 years. So that means that the winter I show up to live in Mongolia is the harshest and coldest that it has ever been IN MY LIFETIME…. I knew it was cold, but the coldest in 30 years??? Holy FRACK!!! Again this is not something Mongolians would agree with me about but that is so fracking cool!!! (Please pardon my Battlestar Galactica swearing…i seldom swear…blasted good parenting)

Better still, having gone through an impressively cold winter this year, the law of averages would suggest that next winter (when cold weather may lose its coolness factor by that time) may be more mild. I cant wait to have an M-21 stationed in my town whose freezing their ass off and I can go “you think THIS is bad?” Wont be long now. Were already in 2010. Days last forever and weeks fly by…

Additionally, I have spent some of the weekend watching a television series I had never heard about but was sent to me in my last care package by my dear sweet Aunt Susie. It’s the most bizarre and fun show I have seen since Firefly called “Fringe” I am burning through the episodes but I can tell I will be watching these again. I think the X-Files was just a few years before my time, and this show is definitely the same theme but more cutting edge effects and better acting making for an awesome show. Plus the main female character is REALLY hot! That matters to late 20’s males holed up in Mongolian towns for over half a year.

February 1, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -25 degrees Fahrenheit. The wind came back

Today’s Quote: “Sex is a lot like pizza. Even when its bad, its still pretty good” My best friend David

Ill get to today’s blog in a moment, but I just had a REALLY good idea. You all know that show “The Amazing Race” and how they get duos to race around the world? Well to get on the show you need a “niche” of sorts. You gotta be fraternity brothers, or 9/11 firefighters, or the estranged mother and daughter. I think I just thought up the greatest combo for the amazing race!

My best buddy David is in the Air Force and is currently serving in Iraq, and I am in the Peace Corps teaching kids in Mongolia. The Soldier and the Peace Corps best buddies. Damn id watch that duo even if it wasent the two of us! Were also both in shape, capable and good working together in stressful times. Next time I get internet ill propose it to his wife Martha, who is also a very dear friend of mine as well.

On to today…so today was teacher day officially where the students teach the classes and it gives the teachers an excuse to put on the ridiculous school uniforms and play around in class. In essence it’s a wasted day of goofiness. I liked it. As usual I forgot my camera, and am all the more grateful that I have two years of service and not one. On a more salacious note, it was rather amusing to see the female teachers putting on the schoolgirl uniform of Mongolia. I don’t know a single thing about the sex lives of Mongolians, but I wonder if they use today as an excuse for a little roleplaying that evening. Somehow I doubt it, the uniform as I described it before is a bit of a cross between a maid outfit and a bank teller and based on what I observe Mongolians aren’t too into make believe, but I just tried to imagine a teachers day in America. Oh hells yes that would be used as an excuse for fun by teachers.

I got a little too ambitious though and this afternoon I went out for a run. Though it was about the same temperature outside as it was yesterday unfortunately the wind was out with a passion. All my layers, all my clothes, all my tolerance for cold and I felt -20 degrees Fahrenheit blown at me at 15mph. It took ALL the energy out of me and I ran solely to keep my body from freezing to death. When I got back in the apartment the snot in my nose was still literally frozen and I spent a minute holding my nose to get it warm enough to melt out. I know that I miss running but I need to be careful about doing that. When its windy like that the cold saps my strength, and even a mile or two out of town is enough distance for me to get hypothermia.

Those were the biggies. I am weighing options for tomorrows assignment. With Tsagen Tsar coming up in two weeks ive decided to do one goofy lesson and one serious lesson and I cant decide whether to do the goofy one tomorrow or serious. I am leaning towards the serious because the kids may be mentally checked out the second week and a goofy lesson will grab their attention more. Ill sleep on it, as I sleep very well out here. Im gonna have a spine like Buddha by the time I finish Peace Corps with how often I sleep on a solid floor.

February 3, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -18 Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Don’t call yourself. Dozens of people experiencing time travel have tried calling their past selves and the conversation has never been productive.” –Ford Prefect

Uncanny… I am off the grid. I don’t have internet where I live, I don’t buy the hundred dollar flash drive that would give me wireless where I live. My school’s internet is pretty much non existant and my buildings computer café thingy hasent had internet in about five months. NONE of this bothers me…okay it gets a little boring but its what I wanted and its what I got. I am happy that I don’t have that endless and inexhaustible supply of unneeded and stressing information bombarding me every time I open a web page. This is all fine and dandy….but I still find myself required to use the internet once every full moon or so and EVERY time I have used it its saved up all of its frustration for me let me tell ya!

So we fill out progress reports as being volunteers. Ill be honest im not a fan. They remind me all too much of paperwork that I so joyfully left behind in professions that try desperately to quantify their results so that they can make graphs out of it and impress people who don’t know this unneeded information at large conventions with powerpoint slideshows… it feels like something that would be complained about by Douglas Adams in his Hitchikers Guide to the Galaxy books.

Anyway its actually not ALL bad and given that it’s the only real paperwork I need to fill out to continue my service it could be worse. So im not responding to email, so the office txtd me and asked why I haven’t submitted my report. Apparently I am the only volunteer who either doesn’t have internet, or doesn’t drop in to urban centers on a very frequent basis because they REALLY wanted my report.

So last night I bribed my sitemate Tripp into using his internet. Tripp was making some moonshine (inspired by me btw!) and was all too happy to let me use his computer. I filled out the report.

I think I know why else I don’t like these reports. Noone will bother me or use the report to indicate to me how I am doing my job well or not. No Peace Corps doesn’t do that and I am grateful, and this complaint goes beyond Peace Corps and into a lot of what I encountered in the public school system of America as well…but in essence these reports are part of a trend I understand but still cannot stand. People are trying to quantify help.

“You helped an old lady cross a street AND you ran an English club free of charge? Well done that’ll boost you into the orange category for assistance output! Well done indeed! You keep up the good help there Josh!”

Do you see what I mean? It’s not THAT bad but that is a more sarcastic version of what this information is for. Schools that assess a teacher’s performance based on the degree to which the students learn and benefit from their standardized tests and curriculums are trying to quantify something that you cant bloody measure.

Helping is not supposed to be a gauge. Its not a race. Your not supposed to compete with other helpers to see if you are the best helper. Why the hell aren’t we all just trying to help? It’s the opinion of this helper that if someone is helping less than me in some quantifiable way than you are losing the whole point behind what me and the person you are measuring me against are TRYING to do by helping. Stop measuring what we do and instead go teach an English class yourself. Or help the people mix concrete for the basketball courts…

…allright so now that that rant is out of the way back to the form. The internet that my buddy has is fast enough and I cleared through my email, and tried to attach the finished progress report to send it back…wouldn’t send. No reason why it shouldn’t. Got an IT minor here and its just an excel attachment but it just wouldn’t send. Now if this were America I would just shrug and go to the nearest computer and attach again with their T1 connection….i have no such option here. I spent the next hour banging my head on Tripps desk screaming at the excel file to send. Tripp watched on and giggled. Tripp takes pleasure in being a man of extreme competence (not smugness) it helps you to laugh at yourself after being angry for an hour.

So I gave up, txtd the people at PC saying the send was a no go and then Tripp handed me a swig of filtered moonshine. I took the drink and once my eyesight returned to normal I declined an offer for a second. But it took the edge off and I returned to my place with the constellation prize of a few old DVD’s that Tripp had copies of. I am as far off the grid as I ever have been in my entire life….and the one in a million times I actually need to use the internet it gives me nothing but trouble. Go figure.

I hate internet these days….and luckily I think I got my one bout of annoyance with internet out of the way for the month.

February 4, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -20 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Only I know that for certain…” –My mom said that to a comment my brother and me had made. We were so scared about how true that was we broke into hysterical laughter.

It would appear that this is a week of annoying paperwork for so many. Today the majority of my classes were canceled because we needed to make the school look in great shape…the social workers were dropping in for an “unscheduled inspection” lets all laugh at how unaware we are of the unscheduled inspection of the school by the social workers.

To get back on a rant though, this is what I meant when I said that schools and organizations are far more concerned about looking good instead of doing good. They spit shined the school today into something that wasn’t true, no one believed to be true, and the social workers played along with the lie. It’s a lie agreed upon by many. The greater tragedy is that on its own devices the school is perfectly acceptable and useful. So why not be real with a little dirt instead of spotless and fake?

Well the physical inspection was one thing, but they also wanted to look at the various lesson plans that everyone is required by law to form. Well seeing as noone in my school makes these today’s classes were cancelled so the kids could polish the floors and the teachers could on the spot type up and print unit plans and lesson plans. I was even called in as an accessory as Moogi wanted me to type up lesson plans for her after school English clubs which she has not had since the swine flu epidemic in October.

This is one of those moments where I realize how well adjusted I am to my service in Mongolia. Put me in any work environment back in the states where I was told not only to write bureaucracy… not even fake bureaucracy….but someone else’s fake bureaucracy and I would instead type up a list of places for you to stick that…instead I typed up the list for her. What the hell…we didn’t have any classes after all.

I did this not for the social workers, but for the bond I got with my counterpart for assisting her in such an escapade. Shes grateful I helped her to keep out of trouble. We have that bond now. Collective guilt….its the glue of society and makes the world go round. Jokes on her though, because in one English club she showed Star Wars VII to her students! Well I am glad that’s over.

New fun ridiculous thing going on though. Theres a guy living in Bagkhangai who is trying to go live in America. He found some program where he can work for the Russian embassy in the United States working as an interpreter because he understands Russian. Wait for it….he doesn’t speak or understand ANY English! Hang on, it gets better! So they want me to tutor him. The test after all is in three weeks. Not to worry though, he has the list of questions they will ask him in English. So all he wants to do is know how to answer correctly and with a proper accent so he can get the job and work for the Russian embassy in America even though he is a native Mongolian…..id ask Dave Matthew to play “Funny the Way it Is” but hes too busy laughing his ass off at the moment.

Again, I shrugged my shoulders and we set up tutoring times. Without my labor English Club its not like my afternoons are swamped around here. Actually its rather amusing to teach someone how to pronounce sentences that he has no understanding of at all, truly it boggles the mind. But its only for a few weeks, ill go with it. Add it to the pile of interesting things I have been called on to do during my service in the Peace Corps.

…I have got to get into the Spring and start running again. Today seemed so utterly normal!

February 5, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -20 degrees Fahrenheit

Today’s Quote: “Adopt, Adapt and Improve…” –Round Table Motto

I have a theory. Supported by a few drinks in my system and not all that much to eat today but still, I think this theory holds up. We have a LOT of award ceremonies in Mongolia, especially in the field of education. Now at first I just chalked this up to ego, but today put a new spin on it for me.

My day started at the crack of dawn because I had to teach 11th grade at the first block. Thing is that’s the ONLY class I teach on Fridays. Usually this rocks but now at noon I teach the Russian/Mongolian/English student at noon. Nothing to do but sit in the teachers lounge and…lounge. Which I did this morning. I am beginning to realize that Friday night is most certainly date night for the couples of Mongolia. The teachers (who are all married) use Friday to comb and clean their hair, they put on makeup, and try to look their best. Date night indeed!

Well today we also had at 4pm an awards ceremony. It was a twofer. One to give out awards for the winners of the volleyball tournament, and the other was for the students to present some dance and song performances to the teachers for teacher day which took place last Monday.

Heres the theory. These award shows are at night usually on the eve of the weekend. Everyone gathers, we all clap in unison, and the ladies all gossip about one another while the men use the time to txt on their phones while someone up on the podium says some random stuff that only a handful in the crowd listen to. Am I the only one who thinks that I am describing church right now? Mongolians are not particularly pious, especially for any organized religion or any gatherings of worship…but Mongolians LOVE ceremonies, and the rituals look remarkably similar to me. Whatcha think, am I close with this assessment do you think?

February and March are gonna be tough, I can tell. As usual it is Friday and the theory holds true. Days seem to last forever but at the end of the week time has rocketed by. I know it will still be freezing outside into March and even April, but I just want the temperature down enough to allow me some daily outdoor exercise. I can almost feel my legs atrophying and I can feel myself getting out of strength. I cant exercise indoors that well, and I do worry for my safety when I go outside for running in this weather. Cabin fever too, yea I feel that.

Silver lining though. Though I wont be going into UB likely until the end of the month my sitemate Tripp has graciously decided to collect two packages my mother has sent. I am crossing my fingers for some new video games. I have put the Civ IV game away because I really was gonna give myself an annurism if I kept playing that. Alright, time to relax a little tonight. All the best all.

February 6, 2010. Ondortolge, Mongolia.

Today’s Temperature: -25 Fahrenheit, strong wind and snowing…

Today’s Quote: “Pic..pic…pickle.” – The Janitor

So I woke up this morning with a painful feeling of restlessness. There was nothing for this, I needed to exercise no matter what. So, without even looking through my ice covered windows I threw on my clothes, ran down the stairs and threw open the doors…only to find that it was indeed snowing and the roads were completely covered over while the wind howled…cant run.

Unlike other times though, today was not a day where I could deny my body