So here we are. My last day of teaching. I'm looking around my pepto-bismol pink room that has been my home for two years thinking I've never seen so few things in here. My life has been condensed down to a red suitcase of middling size, a rust colored bookbag and a few plastic bags holding things which will soon leave my possession. What does it feel like to complete my service? I feel good, lost, confused, and a whole lot of other emotions that I can't really pin down. I'm leaving a life I've become accustomed to despite its challenges, errors and flat out backwardness. I don't know what I'll do not knowing how to get around in my space; how to define what it is I'm doing. But I know that there are those here who love me and want to see me. Some quotes from my kids this week;

"It would be easier to say goodbye to you if I were in 11th form and leaving school with you."

"If we're well-behaved in class today will you come back to us?"

"I'm going to miss you Miss Kari."

Reply after me asking a first grader if everythign was ok after he came up to me and just pressed his head against me, "NO! it's not ok, you're leaving. Who's going to teach us English?"

I'm going to miss my kids and have found myself crying a few days this week; there's a love there I can't explain. I'm going to miss walking the hallways and hearing hellos and getting hugs and seeing people genuinely excited to see me everyday. I'm going to miss calling my friends and laughing about Ukraine. I'm going to miss taking the tram to see people in center and meet for drinks and talk about our weeks. I'm going to miss giong to the bazaar with Druzhka and buying fresh vegetables and talking to babusiyas.

I'm sad to leave, I really am, and yet I know it's the best decision I could have made. Extending would've made me miserable. And I'm leaving with some really wonderful memories about what is happening here. I'm not sure what will happen to Ukraine in the future, but I know that my students will do wonderful things. I hope they will be the salvation for this country, but who can predict a thing like that..

So, the bags are packed, the celebrations had and planned and here I am in the interim waiting to see what my life will look like in my home country. A place I haven't really "lived" in 4 years. I'm looking forward to our reunion America, I hope I can find your secrets too. I hope I can start a new life there.

until we're reunited hugsandlove

Days til COS medical and Halloween: 16

Days til I leave Lviv: 34

Days til my COS: 37

Days til America: 42

There's a lot to do these last few weeks: parties, paperwork, packing and a whole lot of goodbyes.

How does it feel this close to COS? Surreal. I'm not sure what the future will bring for me and I'm ok with not being completely organized with my life going home. Leaving an experience like this is difficult because you can't imagine your life in any other situation. It's similar to the feeling of coming to peace corps only you're not filled with the ideas of a new place, language etc.

I think sometimes what I would tell someone applying to peace corps or someone who has just found out that they're coming to Ukraine. What would I say to help them along?

In all honesty, I'm not sure there's anything that you can say over-archingly to prepare someone for it. There's so much about Ukraine that is so specific and living here is a real challenge in a lot of ways for someone from the American mentality. I don't think I could've better prepared for my experience here, a lot of living in peace corps is just learning as you go; and I don't think any one person is more prepared than any other. When I think of me two years ago, I would've told myself to chill out about the language. It will come, though it will be difficult. As one of my friends said when we were talking two weeks ago, no one has a bad or good experience in peace corps based on language skills. We all do enough to have a good experience and language won't tip the scales one way or the other, it generally just ends up being a status symbol.

You will survive. Whether it's village life or riding a really crowded marshrutka those moments are temporary and you will survive. Your service will be made of small small moments and you won't remember most of those tiny moments. My memory of Ukraine will always include the bad smells and crowded marshrutkas, but it will include a whole lot of other things that have nothing to do with my struggle in daily life.

I'm making it seem like life here is a battle and it is in so many ways, it's not that that's a negative thing. Americans always have a negative connotation with struggle. I find it to be challenging, stimulating and I feel like in some ways I get a real taste of life outside of teh first world here. I view life as a battle here, I really do and often express to my friend if I feel like I'm winning the battle or Ukraine is winning. Most days I am, but there are spurts where Ukraine can get me day after day. But winning feels really really good.

So, people coming to Ukraine, be ready to fight and struggle and be ready to be challenged. Love all the moments you are surrounded by those who care enough about you to help you through the struggle. Make an effort every day to make a good impression on those around you. My best story of the week comes from the secretary at my school. She told me she was waiting for a bus and had seen me walking in the center of town with a group of friends. We were hanging around a statue waiting for a friend to join us and my friends and I were joking and laughing and running around. She told me she had seen me laughing and smiling and it changed her whole day. She thought it was so wonderful how happy I was and how I was enjoying being with people I loved and wasn't afraid of showing that publicly. Sometimes, I think the best gift we can bring as Americans is a sense of positivity in an otherwise doubtful and malcontent world. I'm proud that the thing people will remember about me here is my kindness and my positivity. That's a pretty big accomplishment. We can all bring something about ourselves that is uniquely american, our work ethic etc. Do your best to figure out what it is you want to show to the people you interact with; that's the best preparation you can do for peace corps and maybe for life too.

So here we are, the countdowns that is.

Days til COS medical and Halloween trip: 30

Days til I leave Lviv: 48

Days til I leave Ukraine: 51

Days til I'm back in the US: 56

Tomorrow is the two year anniversary of me moving to Ukraine. Two years. Today, I did word association with a friend to ask her what she thought of first when she heard two years. She said she didn't have a word, only a faint feeling of wanting some sort of ethnic food. She returned the favour and asked me what my association was with two years. My response: awkward. I told her awkward can sum up about 95% of my life in Ukraine. I'm either feeling awkward, feeling awkward for someone else or just in general realising that the situations I find myself in on a daily basis are really awkward. For example, today about 15 of my students separately came up and petted me because my hair was curly. I appreciate their love, but mistaking me for an animal in a petting zoo makes me feel, you guessed it, awkward.

I wanted to write a story about my new 70 year old boyfriend Pan Roman. He's an old man who somehow met some peace corps volunteers in the middle of lviv. Wanting to get to know them better or talk to them he contacted the local government and got them to tell him where all the peace corps volunteers are. Well, not all, needless to say my name was on his list and he's been calling my school since April or so trying to talk to me in English...not for very long of course, but long enough for him to want to meet me. Pan Roman had been telling me every time I talked to him that he was "an old man, well not old but I will say middle aged." Pan Roman also called my school twice a week during summer to see if he could catch me at the time when I was there. He finally got a hold of me the second day of school to resume our conversations that had been going on in the spring. I agreed to meet pan Roman in center on a sunday afternoon and brought my friend, Blythe, along with me. We had exchanged numbers earlier so that if there were an emergency he could call my cell phone as I wouldn't be at school on a Sunday. And so, he had proceeded to call me that Friday night while I was at teh bar with friends to ask me about the name Daniel in English and to say he hoped I wasn't too bored in Lviv. I assured him I had friends and that he didn't need to worry.

On Sunday, he called about 2 hours before our meeting to tell me what he was wearing and to tell me that he walked with a cane. Blythe and I walk down to the center to meet him. I see an older man with a cane and a dark blue tshirt start smiling when he sees two girls obviously not Ukrainian walking up to him and starts saying, "america? America?" Pan Roman as sweet as he is had been lying to me; he was most definitely not middle aged he was most definitely around 70 years old. Nevertheless, I help him up off the bench he was sitting on and walk him while he holds my arm for balance to a cafe nearby with blythe walking near us. Blythe had asked me earlier how I had gotten to know him and I responded with the truth, "in all honesty, I'm not really sure how he found me. He just started calling and I never really knew how he got the number or anything."

We sit down with Pan Roman to discuss anything in English really while he buys us coffee and syrnyky (little cheese pancakes) He must have felt so proud sitting down with two young American girls. He ordered for us and pat the waiter on his hip in a somewhat knowing or charming manner. Blythe and I tried our best to keep giggles in. Upon getting his syrnyky covered in a sweetened sour cream he accidentally dumped his hand into the cream and when blythe alerted him to this he immediately started licking it up and says to us with a smile and a wink, "like a cat, no?" We talked for awhile about how he found me, his health, his life in Ukraine, our lives in Ukraine. A few highlights, Pan Roman's comment, "i have so much money and nothing to spend it on." I suppose this is the reason he wanted to take out two american girls. He also asked us if we were married or in love. He told us that all love is suffering. Blythe asked him if he had ever been in love. His response, "once when I was 20. She was married to a Russian officer. I may have caused problems there." Obviously, they did not married. But Pan Roman followed that up with the mention of his wife. I suppose we don't all marry for love. He also talked about learning English saying, "The best way to learn English is to marry an American woman. You will be so scared when she is yelling at you that you will have to learn what she is saying." Pan Roman also told us we could be late, "because your boys will wait for you." All in all it was a great time at the cafe He recited poems and limericks making sure I had copied down some and memorized others by heart to retell and teach to my students. We walked him back over to his bench and he took pictures with us. He told us that he was going to join his friends to play poker, but he didn't play with russians because they are cunning and will find a way to win. He handed me two reader's digest and let us go on our way.

A few days later, he called to make sure I had found the chocolate and talk again about our meeting and about life in Ukraine. This week he called to tell me a few things, one that he has a hard time sleeping and so he is goign to call me later at night. So you know, he had called at 10:00p and may be calling around then later. Also, to tell me that he had been thinking about Blythe and I. He had decided that Blythe was strong and clever and I was soft and so he worried about me in Ukraine and wanted to take care of me and of course give me more 10 year old readers digest.

Pan Roman has become a fixture of phone conversation these days. It's nice to know that every week I'll get a phone call or two from an older man who cares about me and just wants to talk to me before I leave. He is sad that we are leaving and I can tell he would've been so happy to talk to me during my whole service, but such is life we do what we have the opportunity to do. But for now, I have a wonderful 70 year old boyfriend who calls me regularly, brings me chocolate and readers digests and cares that I'm doing ok. I count myself pretty lucky, even if it is only for two and a half months.

So, numbers here they are

Days til my close of service physical exam: 38 daysDays til I leave Lviv: 66Days til I leave Ukraine: 69Days til I am in the United States: 74

appts. scheduled with peace corps office in the last 2 days: 12appts. still to schedule with the peace corps office: 3appts still to have with peace corps apart from those scheduled: at least 3

So, the words here they are. . .

I'm leaving, leaving sooner rather than later. And I'm in the midst of doing everything to get ready to do that leaving. What does leaving peace corps feel like. . . a little like coming to peace corps, a little more stressful (the feeling of real life is pounding on that door), a little less American ( I feel that way, I am that way), the want to rediscover what America is and what it means. . . people always say peace corps taught them to live with less, I find it makes people want more. Like, Peace corps has taught you that you can live without a car, but chances are after 3 hour marshrutka rides you really want that car these days. I could be wrong.

How am I feeling: Good, accomplished, so far on top of the tasks that need to be accomplished. My DOS is two paragraphs from being finished, my site evaluation form is already finished and the majority of my paperwork is yes finished. Or at least, finished as much as it can be until October.

How are my students feeling: You're leaving in November and never coming back? NOT EVEN FOR LAST BELL????? How about you extend your contract? My go to response is the following, "my mom would be really mad if I didn't come home." A world where you do not want to come back to Ukraine doesn't exist for my kids.

How is it getting a schedule with students you like working with AWESOME: I'm currently teaching younger kids english (bonus they're way more fun to work with so 1-5 grade english) AND 5-11 grade French. Now if the hours get moved around next week so I have Fridays off and no class Thursday so I can work with the militia I'll be ecstatic! Updates on that later. If I've learned one thing in Peace Corps it's that during these two months I have the right to say nope sorry can't do it; I just can't do it.

My fifth form is loving French so much. I want all of them to be little polyglots. I suppose they already are, they know ukrainian and russian and a decent amount of English. Now french and they speak the universal language of hugs and stickers too.

This is a throw away blog about numbers and such. One I've been waiting to do for a long time. The next one I promise will be more pensive maybe even more entertaining. loveandhugs

Late summer realizations:

I prefer hanging out on my wood floor over my bed or chair. I'm not sure if this is because the chair and bed are that uncomfortable or that I've gotten so used to stiff, ill made chairs and beds that the floor actually feels like the luxe edition of the furniture. Sometimes, I feel like the caveman character people find who can't go to bed in the modern furniture and much prefers to sleep outside on the ground. . . that being said, if my wood floor is luxe, the fivestar suite is my tile bathroom floor.

Listening to more modern electro music a la passion pit and friendly fires immediately makes me feel like I should be shopping in a gap. Listening to anything with an accordion, brass band and clarinet makes me feel like I should be riding a bus or getting off a train. . . music dislexia or rather misappropriation.

I understand way too much of ukrainian, russian and other slavic languages to not notice when it slips into american pop culture like movies, tv shows, etc which is a surprisingly high amount. It only slightly ruins it and slightly makes it better. Polish still just sounds like Ukrainian with extra sh sh sh sh sounds.

I feel a kinship to people who lived in gulags which is borderline inappropriate given the fact that I've never suffered any kind of political oppression or soviet regime. But, you know, some similarities.

I'm surprised when my beer, water, coke and or anything that would normally be cold is cold. And, I'm not talking when it's really cold I'm talking when it's slightly refrigerated above room temperature I get surprised and feel the need to comment to other people. I'm so excited for ice and tap water I can hardly stand it.

I can tune into someone having an English conversation from about 20-30 feet away. This skill is going to make me an ultra creeper when I get back to America. I can pick out non-Ukrainians almost as well as a native ukrainian. Integration - check!

I miss home, I want to go to there. Today a girl who has applied for the same day as I have posted that it's 100 days until the hopeful COS date. That means America in less than 110. Egatz!

loveandhugstoall

Adventures in Odessa and Novodnistrovsk:

Once Upon a Time I took a trip with my two friends and fellow PCVs Joe and Meaghan.

Scene 1: Meeting in Kyiv. Joe took the GRE and Meaghan lives close by to Kyiv. We met at a pizza restaurant where Meaghan and I bragged about how much squash bread we had made. She made it with Kabachok (a light green zucchini like thing) me with pumpkin.

Scene 2: the train we all talked and made our beds rejoicing in our newish train car that had a window that opened. The ukrainian in the one bunk we didn't use closed it during the night. Joe being awesome opened it and stuffed his pillow in the way so the Ukrainian couldn't close it all the way. THe Ukrainian promptly wrapped his head in a turban like sweatshirt to not get the draft at night. Score one for train car comfortability.

Scene 3: Arrival in Odessawe tiredly walk to the hostel where I immediately scope out the shower and we hang around til we decide it's time for an adventure

Scene 4: Thai restaurant. Joe's never had thai, the closest he's had is american chinese food. He looks freaked. He's a good sport and rocks some chicken noodles. Meaghan and I delight and people watch and teach Joe about the importance of a bra that fits and is supportive. Joe feels like we've ruined boobs for him. I feel like he can take it, so does Meaghan, we show him no pity

Scene 5: Hostel owner tries to get us to come to a Ukrainian dinner that his gf's mother cooks it's 100 grv way over priced. Then he tells us people backed out so they need more. We slyly sneak out and have georgian food instead (WITH CILANTRO AND SPICE) also georgian lemonade is delicious bring it to lviv!

Scene 6: We walk around town all day. We find the special chair from Soviet movie that I don't really remember what it's about something about riches being stored in chairs. This explains more abotu how ukrainians save things than I would care to explain. We see men with mail order girlfriends a common thing in Odessa, it annoys us. We admire how beautiful and clean the city is and love the diversity. We go to the large bazaar which is SO clean. Meaghan gets an amazing shirt that says, "say me yes." We both buy captains hats for our friends at home.

Scene 7: we walk to the seaside port and see the wonders of the famous steps of odessa, apparently also in a soviet film. we get some gelato and enjoy along our walk.

Scene 8: Meaghan and I decide to go to the bar with some other english speakers. Bar has american atmosphere. Meaghan and I "hold court" aka getting surrounded by men who want to stand by us and talk nonsense considering my ukrainian might be better than theirs and they some can't speak english. Thus begins a 2 hour attempt to get us to play alligator (russian charades?) and them buying us lots of drinks. "I'm Irish, can't you tell I have a red beard and a hat." I didn't know that was the requirement but there it is

Scene 9: We wake up and bring meaghan to the train station after a thrilling round of jeopardy games that amused everyone in the common room including the hostel owner. Being the coolest people in the hostel is tough. Train station highlights include playing charades with Meaghan through the window and seeing a man with a fanny pack shaped pocket on the back of his jeans. Why did I not get a picture. . maybe joe did? Then we saw a typical eastern european brass band with clarinet etc. in navy gear greeting the train from Moscow

Scene 10: Joe and I leave Odessa

End Act I - Odessa

THe rest of the trip was hanging and laughing with Joe.

If you ever come to Ukraine as I'm sure all of you will. I highly suggest Odessa as a destination! Delightful

Coming home updates:

COS date requestedCOS packet receivedCOS Conference in T-minus 18 daysloveandhugstoall

And so it begins: the ups and downs of a summer day in Ukraine

Let's try and go every other for this: but in all honesty, this will be a little heavy on the downs although it's not so much downs and just challenges.

First off: the beginnings of the COS paperwork have been sent out and that is definitely an UP! This means that I'm starting the final paperwork for me to return to America. Heyo!

a down: I was cornered and groped on the city bus on my way to meet my friend in center. This isn't necessarily something that isn't commonplace in fact it very much is commonplace but all the same this one was a tad more aggressive and ended in me having to push the guy and his wandering hands off of me. Sometimes I get tired of it. I suppose that day was just today.

an up: I finished my time with the militia, at least for now. I'm on break until September and I'll be heading tonite actually to Odessa with two of my friends who I hardly ever get to see here!! So I'm looking forward to a warm vacation in the south of Ukraine filled with the joy of lots of laughs and fun times.

a down: Yesterday, was really hot like really really miserable hot. I've taken to sleeping on the floor of my bathroom as it tends to be cooler on tile than in my bathroom, however less comfortable and so the sleep is not as good as it should be, but such is life.

an up: I rode in 2nd class yesterday on the train. Normally, I take 3rd class which is something akin to a cattle car. The best parts about second class: air conditioned and the bed was long enough that my feet didn't stick out and get knocked by people walking by. Also, there were no people walking by because it's a private compartment! Win!

a down: Blythe and I made a recipe out of Baba's cookbook which was absolutely in every way disgusting. . . that always feels like a waste of money

an up: I've been able to successfully sit in Coffee House for 5 hours of free internet without being bothered which I find to be delightful in every way possible. Even better, it's air condtioned.

a down: WE picked up the tshirts yesterday and while this should be an up there were a lot of problems with the way they treated blythe, the shirt sizes and one being damaged. ugh such is life.

an up: I got all the info necessary for my OCS banking info they may actually give me money

I think ending on an up note is good so I'll leave it at that. I'm hoping that next week's entry will be slightly more exciting and include some fabulous details of my vacation to Odessa and my first glimpses of the black sea with Meaghan and Joe!

loveandhugs

Summer is here. . . and I actually have time off! Can you believe it? I'm not sure I can in all honesty.

SO this entry will be less fun more introspective. It's getting real that we're leaving (have I been saying that for the last three months?) The remnants of the group before us are getting fewer and fewer and we're here as the oldest group in country. More real is that people are starting to look at job opportunities including myself I guess. I started cleaning out my old apartment today. Finishing my large wardrobe and desk. I have a huge bag of clothes and shoes ready for the women's center and a bag for another volunteer and a bag of trash and a bag that will keep me til i leave in hopefully 4 months. I even started packing the small suitcase I'm using with the things I want to bring home. The more I get rid of the better it feels and more manageable for later. Knowing I won't be hauling things all over to get rid of them is a certain sort of comfort.

After meeting up with some PCVs and their parents I've really started to think about the skills I've learned in Ukraine:

Patience and Self Control in my expectations for others: When I lived in America and especially when I was younger I expected everyone to fall into my own timeline. Being in Ukraine has taught me that while realistic goals and timelines are important and sometimes people can take a few more days to stew and the project won't be the worse for it. I don't expect instant gratification, in terms of service, help or anything. Instead, I take control of what I can and let the rest go. I've learned to not act out and rather look into myself when I think about how I'm reacting to a situation. If something bad happens, my reaction time has gone down. It takes a littler longer for me to react and that in some ways is a source of self control.

And so, those are my reflections for today about life in Ukraine and what I've learned thus far. As I think more and more about service I'm sure these will be just the beginning but for now I'm happy, happy to have experienced and learned, happy to have met wonderful supports in my life and happy that this will add to my life for the rest of it.

loveandhugs

Emotional Control: I don't feel anymore that I'm an emotional being. I've realised that my emotional health has steadied here. I dont' react as strongly to anything and my default emotion is contentedness and surprise when things go well. It's a treasured thing to get a smiling person at a store or politeness on the street or professionalism when I'm dealing with businesses. Those small glimmers give me hope for Ukraine.

Deeper Appreciation for America: I don't want it to seem that Ukraine is only badness and so I've learned to treasure what i have at home or something that is good in the day and I can put up with a lot more, but that is indeed the case in some ways. Ukraine isn't only badness, in fact, I find a lot of positive in it. That being said, I've never treasured the way I was raised and the place I was raised in more. I think, I was allowed and encouraged to think for myself and to solve the problems that I encountered on a daily basis with critical thinking skills. I appreciate my education and my civic education and the freedoms I was granted as a child to develop as I wanted.

Living Simply is gratifying: I complain a lot about public transportation, but in all honesty I don't mind the hour I get on the tram to sit and look at the city and just be. I'm so much more comfortable in my own existence. I'm at home with my own thoughts and these days I think of myself as pretty good company for myself. luxuries seem greater when life is simple.

Standing up for myself in personal and professional relationships: I'm still working on this, but thanks to the help of many of my friends in peace corps who have taught, modeled and encouraged me to do this; I feel more confident voicing my needs and standing up for myself and not being afraid to say "No."

I'm really good at being an objective listener and reading people/situation: I think that this is what I've learned in the last few years that has really effected how I interact with people. I have realised that I can really read people and their tendencies, needs, etc. pretty quickly once having met them. That being said, I can read a situation someone is describing to me about a problem as well. I have never felt so trusted by people as I do here and with that I feel a responsibility to that trust. It makes me feel good that this ability can help me put people at ease with me and I can help others.

My face and facial expressions lend people to think I'm a little bit more helpless than I may be: Older people in Ukraine ALWAYS want to help me with things. Whether it's helping me find the right bus or tram or helping me with my tickets or store purchase. They always speak to me with a comfort and care that I associate with family members. Most often I get called sunshine, sometimes ladies sing to me, sometimes they give me a little extra fruit or vegetable for cheaper just because. They always ask me if I'm warm, what I've been doing etc. It's nice to be cared about by strangers in a world that can be kind of harsh.

The Ways in which Summer has welcomed me back to Ukraine post-familial Italy Visit

1. The smell of the latrine outside my building. Nothing says summer like the stewing smell of a latrine in the heat; makes me feel like Girl Scout Camp all over again. Thanks for the nostalgia friendly neighbor you make waking up at 7 and walking to school that much more like childhood.

2. My first trip back within Ukraine was of course my marshrutka ride home. . . my second was, of course, the tram. Yes, we're back to the beloved tram story. Well, there are two the first was my first tram ride back in country where my tram stopped in the middle of the busiest intersection in town in terms of marshrutka and tram crosspaths. Why you may wonder did my tram stop. Oh, because some one got a little lazy parking and crossed over into the tram line so of course we couldn't move. THe best part really isn't that my tram stopped for so long. It was that my tram driver just laid on the bell, as in ding ding ding goes the trolley bell. After about five minutes of that not working (I know you're shocked) She just decided to get out; so did about half the elderly male population. Some of them tried to move teh car adrenaline style, that didn't work and it set off the alarm. Which also didn't work to call the guy out. Mostly, because everyone in Ukraine has the same generic car alarm anyway. So, after about 7-10 minutes of waiting the guy whose car it is finally gets in and gets it going; old men and trolley driver yelling the whole time. These old men, best part, not even wanting to ride on the tram. After we got going they just kept walking on their way. Thanks for help trying to move the tram dudes I appreciate it!

2b. Tram story number two (don't these make you want to ride the tram) I am riding the tram home from Blythe's and a guy gets on about 2 stops before I get off the tram and sits in front of me he keeps looking back (I figure he's doing it because there's an African guy on the tram and Ukrainians tend to stare at minorities) I'm as always enjoying the soundtrack that is my ipod. I get off the tram and I here some one yelling, "excuse me, excuse me miss, Sorry miss," in Ukrainian. I ignore my soundtrack is going I like to speed walk home it's a nice slightly downhill walk where I don't have to watch out for much (except for the obstacles soon to be mentioned in story 3). So then, I feel a grab at my arm and pull away quickly releasing myself. The guy apologizes and says excuse me about 50 times interrupted by a few good evenings in the middle of the excuse me's. He then tells me not to worry because he's already on his way back to the tram because his stop is actually three stops later (reassuring, sir, reassuring) it definitely makes someone seem less creepy when they tell you not to worry they were just following you off the tram. So he explains that he saw me on the tram and had to follow me off because he felt this desire to get to know me and he's already leaving to get back on the tram but if he could just have my number we could get to know each other. What is my response, "I'm sorry I don't understand you." in my thickest american accent. And so what is the logical response to that obviously, "where are you from?" asked of course in Ukraine. I respond not here (like here like literally this place where I'm standing) he goes, what do you mean not here, I respond not from this place I'm standing not from lviv. I, then, proceed to walk away. He proceeds to not go back to the tram as he promised but instead follows me by about a block behind towards my normally quiet and peaceful walk home.

3. Summer brings a lot of things, new crops of fruit and veggies, new flowers, new weather, new spirit and apparently new roadkill. I know you all really enjoyed the series of suicidal ginger cats. It seems that dead pigeon season has hit lviv. I've counted no less than 8 dead pigeons on my walk to school, tram, center, etc. the past 2 weeks. Thanks Uraine you've really taught me to recognise and appreciate seasonal change, what will I do when I go back to the US without all these markers.

4. Ukrainian men think that summer means that they can approach you and talk to you. Even if you tell them you don't understand anything they're saying and even if they're with their girlfriend. Note story number 2b. Second recommendation: Blythe and I are shopping in the Lviv Opera Market buying some fresh cherries and strawberries (another seasonal sign of summer) and a drunk man is behind us in line. Normally, this is nothing really to worry about but he does stumble a bit so I tell blythe to move closer to me just in case. He notices that I pull blythe over and says, "sorry girls." we ignore and go on our way thinking we are clear of drunk man. We head to the indoor market where he proceeds to stare at us. Blythe tends to get a little more unnerved than I do. So we high tail it out of the market and head towards lunch. We take some winding paths to avoid another creeper on the street who has grabbed me before in public (it's always nice to recognise the creepy men who grab you by face and location! why hello sir, nice to see your aggressively wandering hands again. No but seriously, stay away) So, about 10 minutes later we decide on a place to sit and who comes up but our creepy drunk starer from the market. He sits down and stares you know normal. We are then approached by an ice cream vendor offering us two ice creams as a present. Blythe being the ever keen observer noticed that the creepy man had bought them. what then ensues is an exchange between us and the ice cream. Us saying no thank you, him saying please take them I don't want to throw them away etc. While it is extremely hot out sir, buying an ice cream really makes you seem like a stranger danger sit from kindergarten, but thanks for the gesture. Still not taking it.

4b. Waiting for Blythe at the market a man in a bright orange shirt comes up to me. He goes on a long speech whatever *please note I was wearing my ipod headphones. I tell him I don't understand what he's saying. He apologizes saying that I look sooooo much like a Ukrainian girl he never would've known (not necessarily a compliment). I tell him I don't speak Ukrainian well, he tries in Russian, that doesn't work either. It's a pretty normal exchange minus him telling me how happy he is to meet an American. The only weird thing is he is with his girlfriend like I'm kind of looking at her sometimes as she stands off in the corner and then he asks for my number. I'm not really sure how these things work here in a lot of ways but I'm pretty sure asking for a chicks' number in front of your girlfriend it's pretty inappropro. Holding her hand while walking away makes it awkward for me. . .

And, so, I'm back to the glories of Ukrainian life, including summer uniforms for the police which are no longer super navy dress blue but AWESOME grey linen with matching pants (WIN!)

missall loveandhugs

A walk home from work on a spring day:

- Weather can make or break a walk. Apparently, so can road construction.

- Let us take a moment to mourn suicidal ginger cat who succeeded in his plan today. In all honesty, I don't know if it was that ginger cat, but a ginger cat was dead on the side of the road. I was walking home and in all honesty, look to your left living cat, look to your right before you almost step on a cat that was almost hit by a car. I'm sad to say this is not the first time I've almost stepped on a dead cat in Ukraine, in fact, not even the second time I've almost stepped on a dead cat. Luckily, I've never made contact. The worst part is now I'll have to really avoid that section of my walk because lord knows no one is picking that thing up and I prefer to watch decomposition on video rather than up close and personal on my daily walks.

- I now realise what it was like for women in the 1910s during world war I that lived near the trenches. They have started to dig a long trench, by they I mean some sort of city workers and or private construction company. There's nothing quite like the feeling of about thirty men lined up digging in a trench when all you can see is about chest up while they ogle, whistle, tell one another that you are passing etc. I'm getting the impression that they feel most comfortable ogling from the trench, less chance of bodily harm that way.

- tomorrow I will be beginning the lessons on medical emergencies with the militia, this means we need to learn parts of the body. This can only end in bad places.

-Any day is made better by the assistance of your ipod. Every day of my life in Ukraine I appreciate my ipod, my ability to download new music, and the volume abilities of my ipod more and more.

- Birdsong is always welcome. As is the appearance of a blanket of crocus and snow drops.

- Today I saw a small boy covered in dirt standing at a gate staring at babas on the sidewalk. Stereotype fulfilled.

welcome to the warmth of the sun and the wonders of a nice wind and breezeloveandhugs

Adventures in Tram Riding:

- Admiring the view of spring time suicidal ginger cat looking like it's going to pounce out of the 4th floor circular attic window. In all fairness the others were filled with trash so perhaps it was doing some spring cleaning or mouse hunting among the wreckage, but it looked pretty suicidal to me.

- When riding trams in Lviv; try to avoid the seats that face eachother. creepy men will inevitably sit across from you and mumble at you the entrie ride despite the fact that you have yet to answer anything they have said to you and have strategically placed earphones in your ears. It doesn't matter that my ipod battery ran out 4 stops ago, respect my earphones they are there to deter you from talking to me.

- The number six tram is always crowded from where I live to the south end of town no matter what stop i get on on. I will accept defeat

- Loud obnoxious teenage tourists will always cut in front of you in the "fairy tale line" you're trying to create to buy your ticket. They are cooler than you and no matter your scowl they will not feel guilty. Win one for tourists teenagers lose one for me.

- While waiting at the stop for the tram laughing to yourself perhaps audibly because you saw something that strikes your fancy makes you seem crazy. People, even if your dressed nicely, will assume you are homeless and crazy and won't want to sit next to you on the tram. Lose one for the publics perception of you; win one for extra seat on the tram next to you that no one will take!

- when you are sitting on the tram often the tram vibrates, it's not your phone ringing no matter how many times you check it.

- babas will win in the fight to get up the stairs. they have bags not because they have to cart things but because they are awesome weapons for getting in front of you and the baba will win, she probably has fought for a place in line for apartments, trains, bread etc. for longer than you have been alive surrender to her supremacy

- The feeling of being on a disney world ride d.j.-ed by your own personal ipod soundtrack will never go away. Relish in it, it's WAY better than the crowded bus ipod on only to remain sane while six people are inappropriately rubbing against you soundtrack.

- you're probably going to have to wait anywhere from 10minutes to 40 minutes for the tram to come. It's a really nice time for self reflection and enjoying the comedy that is wild dogs guarding random buildings and barking at strangers.

- Always remember to punch your ticket in the puncher watching other people get cornered by the control check babas is fun from afar but I'm going to go out on a limb and say that probably wouldn't be fun for you. that being said nothing like the mellodrama of a 17 yr old student crying so that she doesn't have to pay the fine as they escort her off the tram. It's like watching days of our lives but in a language I dont' really understand. I fill it in with what I think is appropriate like, "but I love horatio why must I get off this tram so I can't meet him." "He is the father of your cousins baby you cannot be with him." "I will take my milk and smetana and other groceries from the grandmothers that would've been our wedding feast and find a new tram to him." "no we will corner you even outside until you give us your documents we will save you yet." Commercial interlude, by commercial I mean the tram keeps going and my ability to insert dialogue is gone.

Thanks Lviv Tram system you make any day better because I know you present the option for me to not only save 1 grv per ride but avoid smelly standing in the marshrutkas. Here's to you !

There is something about a spring day. . . a spring day that will tickle your face with its soft fingers, fill your lungs with some sort of magic warmth after a bitter cold that left them feeling empty and frozen and sprinkle its melting water on you as you walk through the city needing the small drops of the last vestiges of winter to bring you back down to earth so that you may reconnect with teh warmth of the newness you were forgetting in your daze.

Today was arguably the first real day that it felt like spring and I was able to venture out into the city with just my fall coat on, no gloves, hat, etc. It's amazing what fresh air and sunlight can do to the soul. It's even more interesting how different Ukrainians react to it than I do. Most people I saw, though, of course, there were exceptions were in the same coats, hats etc. they would be in in the dead of winter although today was somewhere around 50/55 degrees. Such is life, well such is life here. I picked up a pair of sunglasses in honour of the beginning of warm weather.

What can I say about life in Ukraine. Life is . . . . busy? I recently had a site visit from my new regional manager which went a lot better than i had expected. I have to say that she's extremely excited and supportive about the work being done by all the PCVs in Ukraine and I think she's right on about nipping all the bad talk amongst volunteers in the bud. She had great feedback for my lessons and was really happy with my work. It was nice after hearing all the volunteer buzz that someone from the office likes my work, thinks I'm a good example of a peace corps teacher and is happy with my overall commitment to Peace corps. Proof again, that everyone's experience here is different and doesn't have to involve the same experiences.

School life at my school of primary assignment is good and bad. Good because most of my classes are going well and bad because everyone is dying for spring break which thank goodness is a week away and the kids are getting spring fever and I can tell the older grades are starting to check out. The nice part about the week of spring break being where it is is that this week I teach 4 days. Then I don't have to see the kids for teh week and then it's almsot april which makes life a whole lot more bearable.

My secondary work at the banking institute continues to go well although it's still early and so there hasn't really been time for any issues to crop up in all honesty. The classes are good and the students are motivated to learn which helps makes me feel a bit more useful than just doing whatever.

My work at the militia is progressing as best as possible. Minus the weekly surprise visits from some random news outlet i would say that all in all its been a rewarding experience to get to work with the adults in the town. I'm seen as a small girl not capable of much, but they challenge themselves to learn the phrases and questions I put ahead of them and I find it flattering to know that they put the effort in to learn where they definitely didn't before. It's good work and maybe some tourist will have an easier time because I was able to help with some English.

My peace corps work isn't taking over but has increased a hundred fold since fall. I'm now co-facilitating the regional collaborative, doing warden stuff, writing a piece for a young learners' manual, doing some presentations at the meet your neighbor meeting about collab and warden info and trying to organize so oblast wide social outings and volunteering outside of our primary organizations.

And so that leads to the rest of life here in Ukraine. With just about 8 months to go I find myself wondering where the time went while simultaneously amping up about my future in America. The best part about spring coming is that it has granted me the greatest gift of all distraction. Although I must say, I've been somewhat disappointed that it hasn't come all at once. That the leaves and the fresh vegetables and flowers of spring haven't started bursting out of nowhere on teh first day of warmth just because the sun has come out. I suppose they're a little more like Ukrainians in that way. It takes a few weeks for them to shed their layers and start emerging in spring wear and excitement. I have a countdown to Italy going something like 60 days left until I head out to meet up with my family . . . unreal is all I can say about that. Unreal.

so there it is for now. Nothing too new or exciting. I've started to dream about america and then when I'm conscious I get scared of going back. . . such is the dichotomy of the transition I suppose.

loveandhugs toall

I know it's amazing two blog updates in one month, let alone one week.

The past week has been a daze of running around. Not that I don't mind being busy, but hours upon hours have been added to my schedule the past few weeks not allowing for anytime for me to really experience anything more than needing to be "on" and fighting back constant fatigue. I suppose it's normal for people in this position and I try not to let it ruin my mood. Being busy can only serve to make me more productive or at least I would hope.

Most peace corps volunteers seem to fill time with projects and working groups; tv and movies; books and work and travel. I do all of this too, well maybe minus projects BUT the thing that I've found most fulfilling in peace corps has been the personal growth I've been able to accomplish. I've learned to balance social life with work life. I've learned to turn it on, learned to support other people in their own dreams and mostly I've learned that just being friendly and smiling has done more for my work here than anything I could've ever done in the classroom. I feel that way with peace corps volunteers too. Peace Corps Ukraine or at least the volunteers sometimes feels a little bit like middle school, and for all the goodness that having so many volunteers in one country brings, I feel like sometimes it does a lot to undercut people's confidence in themselves and the work they are doing. I know I'm not the best teacher in peace corps, there are far more people who are much more skilled than I am and implement things much better than I do. That being said, I feel much worse about myself when I hear other people's views of what I'm doing. I know that I'm social, I arrange get togethers. But most of this is for the sake of getting to know people and letting them know that they have someone they can talk to and who will listen without judging their projects. That I think is rare in peace corps. If I could leave one imprint on my students it would be to work for their country if I could leave one imprint on my community it would be the value of happiness in every day life and if I could leave one imprint on the peace corps community it would be to take a step outside yourself and look to support those around you and encourage teamwork among volunteers.

These days I've gotten another bout of homesickness, these seem to coincide most times with a group either having their COS conference and/or leaving. Seems normal that someone else heading home would put that into my head. This time it's the last group to leave before my group heads out. I'm amazed at how many of us there still are. 101 volunteers from my group still active out of I think 114/117 who swore in. It's unreal to me that we haven't lost more. I wonder if more will leave for grad school. I know there are some people who openly voice that they will. But I will hold on hope to be reunited with those who mean the most to me at our COS conference. And meanwhile, I'll be fighting through the homesickness until May when I'm reunited with the family. How unreal is that, only 3 short months until I see them.

loveandhugs to all

So here we are and it is mid February and I can hardly believe it. The winter has passed faster than I could have imagined at its outset as I dreaded the short days and long nites of bitter cold and snow. And so far, while there have been challenges the world seems to be softening under the warm temperatures and regular appearances of sunlight glistening between bare branches.

It is amazing how changed my life is from last winter. I walk to school now after a change of living situation following the incident at my old place. And now, I find that my mornings have a new sense of peace and quiet to them I never had when I was merely alone in my apartment. The feeling of walking every day to work allows me a sense of me time that was heretofore not a part of my life except in the small doses of walks to wherever I may have to go that day. I will say that the ability to enjoy this time comes mostly from the fact that I have my ipod. I remember once I listened to Ben Stein speak at my university and he spoke about how spoiled teh current generation is and he referenced the fact that not even the richest most privileged kings of past could carry a symphony with them wherever they went. I immediately thought of Handel and his water music to make the kind of perhaps argument of the first prototype of trying to have an ipod with you. Nevertheless, he's right, it's a kind of luxury that hasn't been imagined before and teh ability to create my own universe inside teh shared universe I live in has become a mainstay in my life here and of course in America too. It's the one way I feel like I can block out the hustle and bustle of life in the modern world. Odd that it takes a piece of modern technology to get me into the Zen place of disconnect. I suppose that's something that a lot of people are searching for in their spiritual lives. I find it in music and given my past it doesn't surprise me that that's the venue where it is most possible.

Life is twisting and turning and I feel with a new sense of urgency the need to start thinking about my readjustment to the states. one can only live in teh moment for so long when an international move is on the horizon. I met some other Americans the other day, wives of basketball players who play on teh European scene specifically Lviv. I felt like america and all its personalities was shoved in my face and I felt the need to decompress afterwards feeling a little scared and a little put off while feeling a little bit at home with it. I live some how in this in between; I'm not fully American in my ways and I'm definitely not fully Ukrainian and so I'm living in teh borderlands of two cultures both of which scare me in some senses. I worry sometimes about my readjustment; my change of expectations and the worries of information dumps that are surely awaiting me. It's gotten to the point here, as I'm sure i've said that I don't know what I'm missing, I dont' remember what things are like in some sense and I don't know exactly what I should be expecting. The girls I was with yesterday had an ipad. I've never even seen one in person. I've read about them a little, but other than that my knowledge is about the same as a person who's seen a picture of a television but has never watched one. Somedays I feel like a luddite. A little afraid of technology and wary of its presence in my life.

Here's to the next 9 months of preparing and getting myself ready for my next adventure and for finding a little solace now and again in the simplicity of music.

hugsandlove to all

It seems a good time to update the journal a whole new year and a whole new month of new experiences some good some bad but mostly new and exciting.

December passed in a haze of craziness: First, my aunt Teri came to visit. Easily the best week of my life in Ukraine to date. It felt almost like a different Ukraine then the one I had been living in and i was able to experience things with new eyes and felt the love that only comes with family.

Second, a week of quarantine where I was able to just do whatever I wanted. Then came my birthday party and the event of the season when in the middle of the nite 3 guys broke into my house punched me in the face and broke my nose and hit my friend over the head with a metal toy gun before the men could push them out of my apartment and made things safe again. Following the event, I was taken to Kyiv for medical and emotional watch. The week in Kyiv was unreal. I spent the day of my birthday in the car on the way to Kyiv and enjoying a Chinese dinner with Blythe who accompanied me there. I spent Christmas with our Programming and Training Director and his family which was really really really fun! And then when I returned to Lviv I had two days to move out of my apartment into a new one and then head to Egypt.

The week in Egypt was exactly the recharge I needed. Tanning relaxing and being with some of my best friends in an environment I never really thought that I'd experience in my life. I was able to do so much including riding a camel (easily one of teh highlights).

now I'm back in Lviv and back to teaching. Looking out into the calendar realising that I can't say I'm leaving next year but THIS year kind of scares me/excites me etc. The best part is is that my calendar is filled with things to look forward to. I've only just arrived back at school and I have only a few weeks of teaching left in the month of January partly due to the fact that I'll miss three days to do my mid-service medical exam in Kyiv next week. After that it's one short month of February and then my parents may/may not come. April may have a visit and May I'm headed to Italy to be with the family all together! I can hardly believe after that I've finished my last full semester in Ukraine and I'm into summer where I'll be loving every single minute of knowing that I'm headed home in fall. . . it's crazy to know how fast this is all going and exciting to think of home even if I am happy to be here. . . wow 2011 I feel like a lot is going to change and be in store for me.

love and hugs to you all

Wintry dreams and wonders. Something about winter always makes me feel at home. Maybe that's what happens when you spend your defining years in the arctic tundra of Northern Michigan. But the familiar feeling of snowy ground and rosy cheeks feels like home, safety and that everything is going to be fine and there are no worries. At least in its first moments winter and its weather tends to bring me comfort. Perhaps in two months when I'm done with walking around in snow I won't feel the same way, but for now I can feel the difference in my mood having to do with snow, coolness, long underwear and a newly found musician who's fitting my wintry bliss just right.

Two entries in one week suffice to say is a product of this happiness. I feel as if these past few weeks have been spent in a haze; one induced by the boredom of my work. My mom called me out on it last time I talked to her on skype, commenting that i just seemed bored. Which is true. I'm itching for winter break to come and to give me some refreshment in that department. But in all honesty today I played battleship with my sixth form and couldn't have been happier. It was good number and letter practice and I just really felt nice to take a break from putting on the show. My second form we actually did some learning. This isn't my favourite group from last year, in fact, its the group where I regularly have to break up fights. But it is home to two students who I worked with this summer at camp who adore me. And between one wanting to stand with me at the front of the room while I teach so he can hold my hand and the other one coming up to me when I was working with another student just to give me a hug my little christmas filled heart grew three times its size.

I talked to Kyle this morning; talked being metaphorical for facebook chat. I could go into the millions of ways and reasons why this conversation set the mood for a day without any problems, but suffice to say Kyle brings humanity into my life and reconnects me to my own life; and I'm grateful for a small moment where we could commune over my morning tea making me feel like my life in America wasn't too far away from me.

I started teaching the militia, by started teaching I mean I showed up for my meeting which was in all honesty a comedy of errors from beginning to end. There are a couple of things I can check off my life list: sitting in a police office with 3 men while they question me about my background (albeit in a non-threatening and more flirtatious manner). Having Ukrainian Militia men ask me to translate two things, "Hello" and "hammer." After being up-ed and down-ed by the first office I had a Seargeant of the Lviv regional police compliment my eyes and then up and down me ask me if I wanted to drink cognac and later in his office before he told me about his dead wife started singing a song about my beautiful "Kari Ochi" otherwise known as hazel eyes, which I don't have, he insisted I did because my name is Kari. Finally, he told me if ever i was in a bar and drunk men wanted "bad things" I should call him and he would take care of it. Thanks Sir! So, now, if wanted I have protective Ukrainian Militia detail and a lot of men who think I'm "their american" brought especially to teach them English and brighten their day with my coy blushing and giggling ways. So many life goals accomplished and only an hour and a half spent in the office.

so there it is a second entry for the week. i hope you're all feeling the warmth I'm enjoying right now in the soul sense rather than the temperature sense.

loveandhugstoall

Winter has arrived in the lacy snow that's covering my backyard and trees. It's funny to think of a playground school yard as your backyard, but I suppose that's what it is. The holiday season has begun with Thanksgiving already through the door and the anticipation of Christmas time activities already filling my head and keeping the time from passing quickly. I can feel the settling in; the familiar feeling of winter here. I feel my body saying, "put on the long underwear. You know what you're in for." The temperatures are dropping though they're nowhere near what they reached last winter my heater is already plugged in and starting to swirl the warm air around my room. Though it mostly feels like it's swirling warm air within a one foot radius. And so, the season of 3 pairs of long underwear has come again to Ukraine. There's a little solace in knowing this time next year I may just be in a decently heated living space. I'm excited for winter (at least the first part of it). Mostly, just the holiday season. But I'm happy to feel something familiar. This whole last year, everything felt so new, all these things at school or in Lviv that I hadn't experienced yet. And eventhough feeling like everything is new or different can be fun, it actually feels nice to know what to expect in some ways. I'm looking forward to school Christmas pageants and performances to watch. And small parties with other volunteers. It seems most are headed home for the holidays and while I get it the going home that is, I feel more comfortable with staying and not rocking the boat.

Thanksgiving was good. Lots of food, lots of people and a feeling of community that a lot of times I find myself missing. I think that volunteers really try to create a sense of home for one another which I really appreciate. I think that maybe it's the feeling of being completely isolated in a lot of ways (despite technology) that makes us cling to one another for care and compassion. Of course, there were typical holiday dramas that played into the day, but overall, the day gave me a sense of being a part of something that was a pretty decent substitution for the love of my family.

I accidentally bought beef tongue at the store the other day instead of stew meat. I really need to start reading labels instead of just blindly picking things up. It's not that I can't read or that I don't understand words, it's just a lot of work to pick up a package and read it and figure out what it says. It adds a lot of time to shopping. I used to put in a lot of effort, mostly because packaging here never felt real. Like I would find something I would expect to be one thing because of how it was packaged and it turned out it was something completely different. So, when I first arrived I studied and studied what the package actually said. Nowadays, I just sort of stick to what I know, trust my eyes or in this case eat the fact that I bought beef tongue instead of stew meat and start brainstorming or internet searching for recipes that include beef tongue and let me know how to cook it. I'm not grossed out by eating beef tongue and I'm sure there are some volunteers that would just pitch it and call it a loss in the living allowance column, but I just feel bad tossing perfectly good meat even if it is something I wouldn't normally pick out. The package recommends I use it for stroganoff. I hate stroganoff. My brother suggested Vietnamese dishes (good luck finding veggies or materails to make that in winter in ukraine, does the recipe happen to have beets?) So, I'm thinking I'm going to make a soup which means another trip to the store to get beef bouillon but who knows what kind of soup this is going to be. I'm thinking some sort of beef and tomato combination.

So, what's going on in the work department. I know that the world of TEFL is thrilling in everyway for all of you. I'm teaching, as per usual, my normal classes in the school though the schedule has changed. . . again. . . and probably will, again; as soon as the new semester starts, that is. Other than teaching at school I'm also teaching a private student named Pasia, who I wrote about in my last entry. She's really great and I'm thankful to have met her and gotten to know her. AND I'm now teaching the Lvivska Regional Police, I know, you're jealous. The president has issued an order that Police in the cities where the Euro Cup 2012 will be held to learn English to help along with tourists etc. who come to Ukraine to watch the games. That means I get to teach the exciting material of, "Can I see your documents please?" I'm secretly hoping to teach things like, "Hey, hooligans, quiet down before I beat you with my billy club." Probably, not encouraging the best of behaviour, but at least it would be more interesting to draw the visuals. l'll keep you all updated on what it's like to work with the Police as much as possible. My guess is that my nervousness before teaching them that I'm currently experiencing is probably unwarranted, but for some reason, I tend to fear the police here. Probably becuase no one wants to go to jail, especially not in a country that isn't their own where their language consists mostly of threats for students, like, "If you don't start behaving I will call your mother." I'm guessing it's not the best option as to how to begin a conversation with an angry Militia man but it's yet to be tested.

The countdown has begun until the end of the first semester, marking my second full semester here in Ukraine and the beginning of my last full semester here! I'm not exactly sure why I'm so excited about that fact other than things move TOO fast here. I enjoy all the small moments of socializing and teaching and all that goes with being a volunteer, but when I think about my time, it still seems like I've only just arrived. Nevermind the fact that due to constant staffing changes at my school I'm the second most tenured English teacher in the department. And now, as of this month, we're the oldest TEFL group around. The group that arrived before us already received the email about their close of service retreat and the paperwork will probably soon follow. Mine will be at the end of the summer from what I've heard. Well, on the reflection of how stunningly close and painstakingly far the end is I suppose I'll call this one at an end. Happy Advent season to all.

loveandhugstoall

So, the first post in awhile. October finished out with the great gift of one week free of responsibility of teaching. I headed to Poland with Linnea and met Ama there. You can check out the pictures on facebook if you haven't already. There are a few great things about the trip: one, it was my first trip outside of Ukraine since arriving (otherwise known as in over a year) two, it gave me a much needed break from the day to day challenges of being a teacher in a culture you don't always understand and three: I got to see Ama; a friend from America who knew me before Peace Corps. Peace Corps has changed me in innumerable ways. I look different, I feel different, I speak differently. There's nothing wrong with any of these changes, but it was nice to tap in to who I was before I came here and feel comfortable being around an old friend. More than anything Ama makes me laugh and makes me feel a sense of stability. Krakow itself was amazing. I think that most people when they picture Poland actually end up picturing something a little closer to what Ukraine is like, but in all honesty Krakow is cleaner than Paris and is super accommodating in terms of English speakers etc. We got to see the city and have ethnic foods and go to bars which specialized in serving something other than borscht and vodka. An all together win I would say. I will say the trip included some interesting travel moments; but the best was being able to say I've crossed a country's border on foot. Now, if only I could travel across by bike I think I'd have most travel modes crossed off.

After Poland, I headed to Uzhgorod, my first time visiting the bigger city in Zakarpatska oblast. I had so much fun and I have to say that I"m glad that I didn't take an all day train to head to Kharkiv for the party out east. Matt, Scott and I dressed as Snap, Crackle and Pop and those pictures of course will be on facebook soon. I forget sometimes what peace corps gatherings are like given that I spend most of my time with Matt and Scott drinking at the same bar in Lviv. But it's nice every now and again to get a good taste of everyone else's peace corps existence.

Now, I'm back to teaching and looking to the future. Everyone can officially start the 12 month countdown because that's how long I have left in my service. It's amazing to think I've been here 14 months; time is funny in that way I suppose. My work here changes day to day; I mean I'm always teaching but I find I do a lot more supporting of my younger students and a lot more giving perspective to my older students. I don't know what to say about the development in Ukraine. In a lot of ways, it's moving so quickly and I'm in awe of what they're accomplishing on the outside. New buildings are always being put up and redone and in terms of looks the city is really changing and I can see the changes even from only the 11 months I've been at my site. But, I wonder sometimes if the Ukrainian mindset will change at the same rate; I know the answer is in theory no. . . I really don't know. Sometimes I see such huge changes in mindsets, with my kids, with other Ukrainians. There's one person in particular here who I really admire in terms of breaking outside the bubble and thinking differently. It's a girl I'm tutoring who is around 20, her name is Pasia. She's an artist and the way she thinks about things completely turns my pre-conceived notions about the Ukrainian mindset into peril. I'm always glad to talk to her and interact with her. She's one of the only people I've met who actively engages with people from other cultures and wants to learn.

So what will November bring; a little thanksgiving celebration and the booking of our Egypt trip. Soon enough it will be December and christmas will be upon us. I'm looking forward to the holiday season, especially knowing it's the last one away from my family.

love and hugs to all

Here's to a crisp autumn. The weather is cold and after a hard week of homesickness I'm feeling myself on the mend. Homesickness isn't something I've ever really dealt with, but it came in full force this week. I suppose it's only natural. But I'm glad that it's passed and I can move on to other more exciting things. This post is probably more about promise than anything else, promise and plans for the future.

My grant is officially written. I closed myself in my house today finishing the grant and working on some other projects I've been putting off during my down and out feelings. I feel like I'm getting back on track and that it'll be soon enough where the project will be on its feet. Then, oh then, this week I got a lot of information about the future. This Wednesday I'm heading to Nosivka, my host village, to visit my host family and act as the adopt-a-cluster person. Can't wait to meet the new trainees and hopefully my presentation will go alright. I'm going to be doing a presentation on young learners and I hope my plans will be ok. Americans can be a bit more touchy and judgemental than Ukrainians and so I hope they're not expecting fireworks. At the very least I hope that my excitement can make up for that. I'm also giving some information on rubrics. Thanks to help from Joe who sent me some of his and then I am going to give information on how I grade my little kids. After that I'll be back home and then in two weeks I'm headed to Poland with Linnea and meeting up with Ama. I really cannot wait! I get home and head down to Uzhgorod for Halloween!!! Still have some costume stuff to do ! But that can wait til next week. And then warden training! Ah life is crazy.

We finally got the plans and price quotes for Egypt so that's definitely a go for new years! Seven days in the warmth of teh desert I'll take it!

feeling good and I figure after last week I should post when feeling good and happy. These posts are more important than the others anyway! There's still a lot on my plate, but I'm feeling more happy about getting things finished and I'm starting to feel like I can do it. I'm looking forward to possibilities.

loveandhugs

Sometimes I think that being busier is better. I think a lot about the amount of times in the states I was working two jobs in order to keep myself busy because I thought I needed to. Being in Peace Corps has oddly enough changed a lot of that. Granted I do work; 18 hours a week in school and I have something planned for about an hour or so a day after school. And on weekends, there's lots of meetings and travel normally. What really scares me is that I've become accustomed to waking up at 8am and taking my time to get ready for work. I enjoy an amount of free time (even when i have events) that isn't really possible in the states. I hope that when I go back to America, I'll still be able to read and to experience. . . but sometimes I worry.

School is going along at a lightning pace and I can't believe it's already October and fall break is rapidly approaching and I'll be heading to Poland. In all honesty, the trip to Poland is keeping me sane at this point. I've been having harder hits of homesickness; though I don't know why. In talking to Joe, he mentioned that everyone of my cluster mates that I am close with have had a chance to see their parents making being away from home easier to deal with. While I'm the only one who has gone cold turkey from my parents for a year. Worse, not exactly knowing how much longer I'm going to have to go without them. Homesickness is tough and it's taken me a really long time to be affected by it. I'm hoping that it will ebb and flow and that it won't always be so ever present in my daily life. I think that as things move along my mind will drift to other things and other plans.

I haven't been getting much reading done, instead I've found myself doing a lot of lesson planning and a lot of phone conversation. I'm hoping to get back to that too. Perhaps, this will just be a blog entry of hopes, the hopes that I want to happen before Poland maybe or just in general.

Well, everything else is going fine. My place is really cold. really cold and I'm trying not to think about what winter is going to be like. I forgot how cold my place really gets. I'm trying to avoid plugging in my space heater until November. But I might have to make it a temperature decision rather than a month decision.

that's all for now. perhaps a more substantial post in the weeks to come after some big events.

hugsandlove

A quick post to say:

It's been one year! Officially my one year anniversary here in Ukraine.

It feels surreal it feels weird, but all in all Peace corps was a good and definitely the right decision for me.

I spent the day teaching followed by heading to dinner with a teacher from school and her daughter. It was nice, simple and a great way to low key celebrate without anyone really knowing.

I feel like I'm hitting my stride here. I should probably check the peace corps health material and see if it says that this is where I should be in terms of my mental state. A lot of volunteers always tell me that the Peace Corps mental health pattern really closely follows there own; so I suppose it may be worth checking out to see if it's a product of my evolution here naturally or if I like most follow the grain. I wouldn't be surprised if it really is just following the grain.

Teaching seems more manageable, freer and not so much like work. The kids, especially the younger kids, are having ridiculous amounts of fun in the classroom. I'm so excited to be able to play games with them. The best part is that I get to reinforce what they're already learning in class. As we move along in the year, they will progress to more difficult units, BUT for now I'm working with them on remembering basic vocabulary, letter identification, number identification and pronunciation. Mostly with the younger kids. My middle ages are working on team games. Giving each other directions or whatever I know their weak points are from last year. The older kids have really varied English skills. But I'm having a good time, getting them to speak and experimenting with different class formats that I haven't been able to experiment with up until this point.

Socially, life is going really well. I, of course, spend most of my time with other volunteers and I have to say that my network while it grows remains pretty tight knit and helps me keep my sanity. One of my new friends, Blythe, arrived in Lviv in June and I've really enjoyed Blythe coming to site. I have someone to cook with during the week and just kind of debrief. She is a big source of calm in my life right now and she's really adventurous and excited to learn about new things so she makes a great companion at site. Beyond that, I'm REALLY looking forward to traveling to Poland at the end of October with Linnea and meeting up with Ama from Lac du Bois. I think it'll be great to relax and explore with them and enjoy some time outside of Ukraine. The newest group of trainees has arrived, so have my two advisees who I'm really looking forward to meeting. November and December bring more work and the holiday season which I'm looking forward to celebrating with everyone here. AND THEN, of course, heading to Egypt with people! SO wonderful

Extra-Curricular work stuff, I'm working on my grant still and am hopefully going to be finishing up by the end of the month and have it submitted in october so stay tuned for information on how to help fund my schools' project ! Beyond that, I'm the new facilitator for The Collaborative in our oblast, which is a group that tries to share information among PCVs about all sorts of things. I'm really excited to be involved in the planning and I'm hoping to get more involved of course. I have some ideas I think would be helpful. We'll see! I'm still acting as the safety warden for my region, which really isn't too much work, just knowing where people are. And I should have another training soon! I will be headed to my training site (hopefully) in early November to be an adopt-a-cluster person. Which means I will be visiting a training group and acting as a kind of visitor to let them know what service is like and to give them someone to listen to if they ever want to contact anyone should problems arise. I'm working on a safety manual with another peace corps volunteer for women and I'm hoping that will be finished up by December! AND I'm going to help another volunteer work at his field day event for kids with special needs!

Other stuff wise, I'm still reading a lot and have been doing tons of crocheting. AND Blythe and I have had the opportunity to can and preserve stuff from teh bazaar and make lots of tasty dinners. I'm loving the fall produce and atmosphere at the bazaar which brings a sense of fun to my life. I've been hooked up with two girls studying at university who want to meet up with me and take walks and speak English. One is the daughter of a teacher here at school and the other is a friend of a friend of a friend. I'm excited to have the opportunity to spend time with Ukrainians. And it'll be great to have something to do some evenings. Although in all honesty my schedule is a touch crazy and I could use the downtime in some ways.

I've started the grad school search in earnest and have some top schools and a premium contender as well. Now it's a matter of putting together a schedule for some other stuff.

My new goals for the new schedule include getting ready for the GRE, improving my language, more/continued healthy lifestyle goals, new responsibilities for collaborative and just trying to challenge myself while still remaining sane.

I suppose this was a kind of information dump. BUT currently, I would say I'm in the best place emotionally, physically, socially, professionally etc. that I've been in Ukraine and I just like to think about why. I'm celebrating my one year anniversary in Ukraine in a mere 7 days. And with just 14 months remaining in my service it's hard to believe everything going on in life right now. I feel really lucky and really peaceful.

missyouloveyou

So, it's September and my one year of being in Ukraine is fastly approaching. In some ways, I can hardly believe that I have been here a year. I feel as if I have only just arrived in Lviv. I feel comfortable and known and my school as if I have the ties that are necessary for valuable work. At the same time, everything still feels fresh. Perhaps it's because it's all repeated action from the things I was doing last semester. Being in a situation when things are repeated should make things feel old and not new, but maybe this is having the opposite effect.

At the same time, today whether because of illness or the chill in my apartment I felt homesick. It happens time and again passing in waves that is a blur between homesickness and just a want for something familiar; something, I experienced before Ukraine. Most days, it's linked to talking with someone from home or feeling that you're missing out on something. It wasn't necessarily like that today. It came to me even earlier than usual when I was first waking. Again, it could've just been wanting someone to take care of me when I'm sick, but I felt the need to be cuddled in blankets in home and not here listening to music and reading books under the familiar glow of the aged yellow lights of the brass lamps of the living room in Naperville.

The winds are colder and with them the promise of winter and a busy schedule taking me sailing. I've felt the newness of working with the older kids this year, and their excitement and ability to speak makes me feel a bit less like I'm teaching and more like I"m sharing. The small kids are still making sure I feel welcomed giving me hugs and small gifts of the in season walnuts they bring to class from their back yards. Nothing like cracking the shell open of the walnuts against the teachers desk to give to your 6 year old students who wouldn't otherwise to be able to open them themselves and in return you're given a grateful and completely honest hug. Kids hug better than adults not doing it out of practice but of sheer joy and happiness to see you. Being mobbed by my students with hugs is one of teh best parts of the day. It's the middle grades I don't know what to do with, the ones that want to take your picture but don't want to be engaged in a conversation with you. Ones that are too cool to hug you and too self conscious to really make an effort. And still there's that bubbling sense of interest in them; that they want to learn but are afraid that they will be exposed as something less than everyone else thinks they should be. Maybe not less but something different.

Getting a feel for this many ages has proven to be difficult. I've worked with all the ages in depth before, but as with all things the cultural differences seems to block any knowledge of how the kids operate. It's funny there are certain things that are so different from American kids. My 2nd graders prefer me to show them a model of drawing on the board or draw for them rather than do it themselves in their own way. When I ask them to draw their mothers most will say, "I can't do it." My response is always, "yes, you can. Just try" They are never too pleased with this. I think of all the times when I've been with young children in the States who relish the chance to draw in their own way, whatever they like. I may have a lot of problems with education in the States, but we do develop a sense of trying and creativity these kids haven't developed. I just want the kids to take risks, to step outside the box, unafraid of the consequences just to say that they tried, but some days I'm afraid they're all captive to the image they're supposed to be upholding. How do you teach someone to take risks, to try something just for the sake of seeing if it will work out, to experiment. How do you get rid of the fear of failure? Something to think about for the next year and a half of my service. Maybe that should be a secondary goal, get my kids to experiment with different ways of doing things other than following the formulas that I think are being shoved down their throats.

Still, the autumn air makes me simultaneously homesick and completely happy.

The winds will blow their own freshness into you,

and the storms their energy,

while cares will drop away from you

like the leaves of Autumn.

Highlights to the end of summer and the school year beginning :

My visit to my host family and the beginning of my scheduled life in school has made me feel grounded and more functional than I was most of summer.

Autumn is coming and I feel the need to cuddle up with all the comforts of home and acoustic soft music.

I missed my students a lot and working with them makes me REALLY happy. Some days I can be frustrated with their lack of listening; but I really couldn't ask for more kind hearted students.

I did a deep clean of my room. This makes me really happy. I'm even currently displaying the shame of the book stack I have. But I do have a pile of about 4 or so books ready to pass on.

I'm finally getting the time to preserve stuff now that I have a partner in canning. Blythe and I have already done apple butter and salsa and we've got plans for this coming Wednesday after a visit to the bazaar. This makes me really happy!

The weather has gotten cooler making it perfect sweater wearing weather aka my favourite season.

I'm feeling a new sense of opportunity with the new school year and this makes me really happy!

I miss my family and friends in increasing amounts; but with my one year in country mark so quickly approaching, I can hardly believe how fast time is going

I updated my wishlist to the right!

loveandhugstoall

So my mom has been asking me for weeks to post up a summer summary so here it is:

End of May: I finished school and enjoyed my first last bell ceremony. I was interviewed by a local news station, which in all honesty I thought was a video being made by our school to commemorate the end of the school year. Then later in the evening, I received texts from a Ukrainian saying that I had been on tv. ugh, well, at least no one other than the people who already know me in town would recognize me, one of the many benefits of being in a large city. After school ended, my friend Aida from Lac du Bois came to visit. She had been studying in Morocco for the semester and was touring around Europe before she headed back to the states. It was great to be able to travel and experience Ukraine with her. The country takes on a whole new vibe when you're able to travel with someone from the states who isn't here on Peace Corps Service. We traveled to some small towns around Lviv and, of course, spent some time in Lviv itself. After that, we headed to visit The Kyivska Oblast volunteer, Meaghan Joyce. We spent time in her town of Kovalivka which is nicknamed DreamLand. The local politician has rebuilt everything, this small village has some of the nicest roads I have seen in the last 10 months. Paved, no divits, it's pretty amazing. We got to dress like babas and go into the church and Meaghan was a great hostess ! We headed to Kyiv the next day to meet up with Linnea and see the city one day before we all parted ways. We walked all around the city, partly in thanks to my bad reading of metro stops. BUT we finally saw a good portion of teh city and the Chernobyl museum. At the Chernobyl museum, was a group of students from West Point, apparently learning about post-soviet Ukraine. After that, Linnea and I went on the pub crawl with the hostel and had a great time. The next day we split up, Linnea and Aida heading to the airport and I took a nite bus to Novodnistrovsk, the site of my cluster mate Joe.

JUNE: So, that brings us to June. Thanks to the pub crawl the nite before I really hadn't slept. SO, I took a nite bus to Joe's site and got there at about 5 in the morning. Joe, who had taken that same bus before had been waiting for me at the bus stop for an hour and a half because his bus had gotten in earlier. I slept off the rest of the travel while Joe helped proctor exams and then Joe took me on a tour of his wonderful town. I even got to take the nice hike down to the Soviet hydroelectric power station! BONUS! See pictures on facebook for the awesomeness that is said power station. Joe made a traditional Ukrainian dinner of Holobtsi, stuffed cabbage rolls. The next day, Joe gave me the grand tour of town, and we also got to hang out at his counterpart's house and had ice cream. Joe's town was super cute. Then, Joe and I headed to Chernivtsi with some of his students to take part in an English language drama camp. We met up with the students and took buses to a town in the Carpathian mountains called Vizhnytsia. There were about 40 students, I think, at the camp and Joe and I were there to help with English language, as teh students were writing their scripts in English. THe camp was great we were in the mountains and near the river. Joe and I really didn't have too much to do while we were there so we got to enjoy the free time of relaxing in the mountains, not a bad deal. One day, the whole camp took a hike up a mountain and had a cook out lunch. The weather was hot, but I had so much fun hiking up and picnicing with everyone there. Joe and I led some games and the whole week I played frisbee and catch with a lot of the kids. This was hysterical mostly because the kids thought that because I could catch a frisbee with one hand that I was an athlete, this however is probably teh furthest thing from the truth. Nevertheless, the kids were great, the plays were great and I had a pretty awesome time. I got home from the trip to camp and immediately started working again at my own site. The month of June basically consisted of me working two hours of playground duty per day and then starting my adult English classes. My adult English classes have been great, they allow me to work with students who want to learn english with no discipline problems etc. Plus the adults in my group are really funny and motivated. It's been a treat and has encouraged me to continue teaching for the year, something I was pretty down on at the end of the school year. Doing playground duty was generally hysterical. The camp was only for 1st through 3rd graders so I was working with all the tiny kids. I will say there is nothing better than walking into a room filled with tiny 1st graders and getting mobbed in hugs because they are happy to see you. The students at the school are so loving and just want to be told they're doing a good job. Somedays, I could've done without the playground duty, but seeing my favourite student a first grader or I guess soon to be second grader named Roma never gets old!

JULY: So after June passed with camp and work, July did the same. Joe came to visit the first week of July in tandem with the Fourth of July barbecue I held to welcome the new volunteers to the oblast. We have one new volunteer in the city of Lviv named Blythe who I think is wonderful! And two others in teh oblast who I've met and are also great! The barbecue was a lot of fun and I got to meet tons of new people, cook and enjoy the wonders of American independence. My security guard told me that all of America had come to my party, I told him while 30 is a lot of people, there were a few more Americans back at home still celebrating. After the barbecue, a group of us all left for Ukrainian language Refresher. I spent a week practicing Ukrainian, enjoying being with my friends and generally loving a week off of school. I came back to Lviv and started working again. But this time, only adult English classes. Since then, I've said goodbye to my friend Linda who finished her peace corps service and headed back to Seattle. I was really sorry to see her go eventhough I know she's happy to be back. Linda was a source of sanity for me and having her leave feels like my service will change somehow. I've also enjoyed some down time at my site just being able to read and do what I would like. I got pretty sick after language refresher and was out of commission for about a week. But now i'm back to healthy status and feeling ready for my upcoming month of freedom ! August will be open for me, no commitments and so I'm going to see my host family in mid-August. It's been a long time, but I'll be really happy to spend a weekend with them.

I suppose that's all. I miss home always and am starting to think about what life's going to be like when I get back. It's not that I countdown the days til my service is over, but with new groups coming and old groups leaving about every 3/6 months it seems like life is always changing and people are moving quickly on. Our next group arrives in country at the end of September and then the next group will be leaving in November/December; and of course the new group will be coming to site in December. It's hard to think that everything is moving so fast, but I suppose that's how time goes the older you get.

love and hugs to all!

The past month has whirled by through a series of visits (mostly), trips(one maybe two) and experiences that it's hard to remember what has happened. I always find when I get truly busy I have a hard time sitting down to write a journal, and thus, I normally don't write until so much has passed I feel like I can't catch up with everything that has gone by so quickly.

Let's start with what has happened since April in the event category. I travelled down to Drohobych where my friend Linnea lives to work a day camp for kids of like middle school to high school age. The day went well and it was my first experience in country working with any kids older than 7th grade which I enjoyed. Plus, there were a lot of volunteers from my group who showed up to work so I felt like we had done our part to add to an oblast friendly attitude. We played games and did learning activities and I felt like it was a good use of time. I enjoyed being with the kids and being able to recapture a part of myself I only really let out in the camp atmosphere. I think it's probably that I'm used to running around like an idiot whenever I'm at Lac du Bois so it makes it helpful here. Another volunteer who had brought her students had commented that her students said, "Kari has duracel batteries in her." Which I found amusing. I also got to see the fruits of my friend Matt's labours as he has taught one of his students to say "Suns out Guns out!"

After this, the visits began, on Thursday Meaghan another volunteer from Kyivska Oblast arrived. we had a blast being able to hang out before all teh rest of the people got there. The thing I like about having people visit is it gives me an excuse to play tourist in my own town. In all honesty, I don't get around Lviv that much. I stay at work most days and do a little walk around my neighborhood everyday but other than that I don't go into center but on the weekends. So I got to take lots of pictures and do some SHAMELESS people watching, which was in all honesty at a prime. The others all arrived into Lviv on Saturday, it was Meaghan Trout's bday and we took advantage of the long weekend for labour day to relax and spend time with one another. I had a great time with everyone. Though somedays I doubt my prowess as a hostess. It's hard for me to know what people may like to see in town. There are lots of churches, etc. But as far as anything other than just walking around the city I'm generally at a loss. The weekend was great, plus it was the "rascal" festival and so there were tents and concerts etc. all weekend!

After everyone had left from Lviv, my host sister and her French guyfriend came to visit Lviv. Things that make my head go crazy, trying to speak French, English and Ukrainian in one nite. it was as always great to see my host sister and meet her friend. The weekend after another group of about ten people came to Lviv for city day celebrations. The weekend was again crazy and organizing and trying to make everything work was tough. But we had a successful dinner party at my place and I enjoyed the weekend despite the rain.

This past weekend I went to a town about 3 hours North of me to celebrate the birthdays of some fellow PCVs and had a great time meeting more new people and catching up with people who I had seen in awhile.

Now let's see on the work front. Things are good and busy and good and busy. I'm working a lot writing tests, etc. for the end of the year. And I feel like I"m doing ok. I've become so tired that sometimes I feel like I"m somewhat impatient with the kids, but I"m trying my best to remain calm and have it work out ok for the end of the year. My first graders have taken to mob hugging me, which is cute and funny and generally funny. I like seeing all the kids in the hallway and saying hello and passing out stickers. I'm working with my director in English which has been nice. And she's offered me to take tennis with her tennis instructor. I've had about 5 lessons so far and am enjoying it.

Tennis class is something out of the story books in all honesty. I take lessons from one man who is older by older I mean I think his track suit is my age and his nephew or asst. or both I can't really figure it out. nevertheless, they are hysterical. The younger one who is probably in his 40s wants to learn English so he asks me to translate when he has a question, not too long ago he asked me what "Be Chill!" means. I told him it was something along the lines of take a rest. And so his next comment to me was, "OK, we will play 20 minutes then we will be chilll, then we will play, then we will be chill." Trying not to laugh during this encounter was extremely tough. THe older man, who I'm supposed to call Meister, tells me he likes my smile everytime we play.

My friend Irene, with whom I was speaking French moved to Congo about two weeks ago. I'm sad to have her go. We had a great going away/50th bday celebration at her house where a middle aged ukrainian man named Andriy asked me to dance and then told me I was a "perfect dancer" and followed it up with "you are like butterfly."

My friends Dan and Lesya had their baby! I'm excited for when I will be able to meet said baby! I'm going to try and let the schedule for both them and me calm down a bit and probably give them a call when summer comes. they're moving into an apt. and I'm sure have TONS of things on their plate!

I had a great dinner two weeks ago with my friends Linda and Christi Anne, fabulous Thai Food and company of course. I always love hanging out with them. It feels homey and comfortable.

My small Lviv family of expats will soon be supplemented by the addition of a new volunteer here in lviv, though from what I've heard said newbie will be in New Lviv which is like a 30 min bus ride from center and thus not close to me or Scott. The new training group will be sworn in in Mid-June and then will be out to site in no time.

Let's see what else, what else, I'm enjoying the many joys of spring time flowers and produce and loving that I don't have to wear a coat outside except for very recentely when there has been non-stop rain.

In other news, I started FINALLY my Ukrainian lessons just yesterday. I'll be taking two lessons a week with a teacher here at teh school, Lilia. I'm excited and feel like I'll finally be able to make some progress in the language. I know my skills have dropped off since training, but at the same time other skills in terms of confidence have grown. So there you have it.

In the coming months, I'll be on the road and so won't be checking emails etc. too often. My friend Aida from Lac du Bois arrives in just a week now and we will be headed to Kyiv together and then when she heads to Western Europe I'll be heading down south and going to Chernivtsi to do a camp with Joe for a week. From there, I'll head back to Lviv. I'm hoping at some point to head to Nosivka to see my host family but it's hard to find the time. After that summer will be in full swing! Thank goodness!!!!!

I suppose that's all for now.

hugs and kisses to all

Well, the business and general speed of things has continued throughout these past weeks.

Firstly, I had a horrible encounter with a mosquito last week leading my eye swelling up like a golf ball. Head to facebook if you're interested while my dignity doesn't cover facebook it covers the complete stranger land that could although probably isn't my blog.

Headed down to the carpathians this weekend to hit up a Half Marathon. Had a great time riding trains. I realise when I look back at these posts that I never really explain socialising in Peace Corps life, perhaps it's my own fear of looking bad or unprofessional or something. Either way, I had a great time meeting new people. And even more, as always I was happy to see Andy again. I can't help the feeling of comfort that comes over me being with my cluster pals. I think it's mostly that I just feel protected maybe we protected each other too much in training. All the same, it is how it is.

Well, the highlights of the marathon were in no particular order: being with fun people, having a great time and enjoying the weather. Oh and Shashlik.

My plans continue to mount up and I find myself not remembering what I'm supposed to be doing. My place is a wreck despite my huge clean out over easter and I have dishes and laundry that are waiting to be done. It seems every weekend from here to the end of school something has come up and I won't have those free days to do anything. perhaps it's my own fault for over committing myself when I had gotten behind already.

I've been having missing home days lately too. I think with the coming of spring and summer I feel mostly disconnected from the garden oddly enough. I miss doing things on the garden with my parents. After France, there was a new zeal in me to help them and I always tried to help with mulching and a couple beds or so every year. I miss not having something to dote on and take care of in the form of the green and oxygen producing. We rode through the Carpathians on our train ride back, I told Linnea a few times. I know that life would've been hard and my life is tremendously more "liveable" in a certain sense living in Lviv. BUT part of me yearns to live in a village and do some farming. Or at least some gardening. Joe has told me about his chances to get a plot, I find myself decidedly jealous.

Other than that, I've returned to teaching of course this week. Filling out lots of paperwork as the end of the school year comes. Journals that I'm never caught up on and other things as well. Had a great class with my 3rd graders today. As always, they make me want to be a better teacher and do great activities with them.

OK, that's about all here. I'm putting out the call for new music. If you can send me things using Yousend or just recommend new albums it'd be greatly appreciated I'm needing a change to spring me forward no pun intended!

loveandhugs

A post concerning Easter and other holiday-esque details

Easter in Ukraine is a magical time filled with busy markets, busy people and more importantly days off of school. My counterpart has returned and with her my hours have gone back to normal (A miracle). I love my third and first forms as per usual and have been making headway with both groups. I know they're learning I just wish they'd talk more! We'll see what happens.

1. A box of books arrived from the United States (awesome) I'm working on a safety project and starting some grant work for my school. And hopefully, keeping busy doing other teaching stuff as well!

2. It's staying light til almost 8oclock at nite making my life that much more enjoyable. Oh yeah and there has been sun and warm weather.

3. An actual talk about Easter. What perhaps are you wondering are the Easter traditions that I so wonderfully experienced? Well, let's start with the fact that on palm sunday they don't use palms but willow branches. Accordingly, I bought a bunch from a baba selling by one of the churches and am now proudly displaying it in my house. I also bought many pysanky or Ukrainian Easter Eggs (think of the ones that most people think are russian in teh states but are actually ukrainian). I have a collection of about 5 or 6 and I'm hoping it will grow with me as my time here does. But of course I'll have to wait until next Easter (my last) to get more. I'm thinking of buying 15 next year (a hefty investment at about 120grv assuming the price is the same. Not much for the states only 15$ but still) I want to bring some back with me to decorate wherever I may live in the coming years. So, Good Friday I went over to Linda's to watch a processional from the church near her house. They have a representation of Christ on a cloth and to symbolize taking him down from teh cross to put him in the grave they process through the neighborhood. Thanks to Linda I got a prime location for watching on her balcony! Then, I hung out with Scott, Matt, Jordan and Linnea. Linnea and I made a spaghetti dinner enjoyed the many joys of bazaar shopping on Good Friday and bought a Pasca or special Easter bread with frosting and raisins inside. THe nite was wonderful, as it's always wonderful to have friends around and just enjoy time and life. Saturday Linnea and I shopped and enjoyed the center of town and then relaxed at my place until it was time to go out again. We rode the tram back towards center and saw tons of people lined up outside the churches with their Easter baskets waiting to have everything blessed. From what I can tell and what I've been told this is what happens. You fill a basket with eggs, salt, cheese, bread, sausage, pasca and a candle and go to church. A lot of people in villages go to church at 3 or 4am and wait outside to have everything blessed. Here in Lviv, we saw them on Saturday nite around 7pm or so. The priest comes around and blesses your food and there you have it. On Easter Sunday, I headed to the architectural gardens with Linda, Robin, Jim and Linnea and we watched an amazing version of leap frog, I bought a painting we walked around the park it was fantastic and filled with people. Then of course, we met up with Scott and Matt. Monday I took advantage of my day off and cleaned my place top to bottom. I was supposed to do this spring cleaning before Easter, but unfortunately only had time after. Such is life.

3. the week

I headed back to school on Wednesday. I was feeling ill from the weekend but enjoyed a "surprise" Easter lunch with the directors and administration at my school. They have been so welcoming and nice to me it's hard to believe that I've landed in such a great situation. Then on Wednesday nite, I had a great dinner with Dan, Lesya and Scott. I had made a baby blanket for them (Lesya's expecting any day now). We had a wonderful dinner, great conversation and played a board game. It was nice to have company as it always is. On Thursday I was feeling pretty bad, but made it through the day. Friday, at my vice principals urging I took a sick day, but felt better in the afternoon. It was Scott's birthday so I went to join him in center for dinner and had a great time with him and Matt celebrating. Finally, I had some holobtsi on Saturday. I have been craving them since training and enjoyed every moment! I also got to hang out with some other volunteers. And came back home to enjoy a nice quiet evening at home.

4. Other stuff

I've been walking every Sunday with Linda, unfortunately today I couldn't make it out feeling gross again. It's been great to have someone who has walked this whole city over and over show me where to go. All in all, I'm going to be really sad to see her go come July, and I hope that our new volunteer will be just as fun!

I'm going to finally get on top of starting projects, calling the person about trading English for Ukrainian and getting to the yoga studio this month. I feel like I can hardly keep my head from spinning on week days some times, but I really do need to get out and start having a week life outside of work and home which is actually work too.

I'm, as always, more than excited for summer and everything that awaits. I'm thinking about a couple of trips, a friend from my French immersion camp may come and visit so I may take her around Ukraine. I need to go see my host family. I'm hoping to go and visit Joe and Andy at their sites. And I'm hoping that I can go and see two of my friends, Matt and Scott coach at a softball camp over teh 4th of July week. Enough trips for the summer add in enjoying Lviv saying adios to Linda and all that and it seems like it'll fly. Plus there's the added bonus of canning!!!!

Love and hugs!!!

The past few weeks have opened up a new world. In other words spring is here in full force, sunshine, daylight savings time and general pleasurable wonder. The kids at school are getting anxious for everything especially being outside. They come early to school these days fitting in a game of soccer before classes start, which seeing them so active about something makes me happy. I cant say I like having kids playing soccer right outside my window at 8am (soccer field is right outside my window) but I'm happy for them to enjoy the weather and breathe the air. I've been taking more walks although not taking pictures (half of new years resolution accomplished half not)I feel like the world has opened to a new town. I live in a completely different city with completely different people. I enjoy things that otherwise would've been dull and I feel the interest of spring and promise of a new existence bubbling under the surface of everything. My mood is really enthralled, ecstatic and some what uncontrollably happy.

Section One: Work Life

feel free to skip sections as you feel fit. First: I'm teaching my "new" counterparts lessons these days amounting to about 22ish hours a week. It's a lot to get used to and a lot of prep work. Some days are better than others but overall I'm ok with it. I know there are only 3 teachers in teh department right now handling at the very least 72-ish hours of English lessons, so it's normal that I"m teaching right around 20/22. The other teachers have a lot of lessons as well, so I'm not complaining. My troubles with discipline are still present; I'm slowly trying to work through them and have been taking advantage of the willingness of the other teachers or sometimes administrators to sit in on my classes to control the discipline. Discipline is super challenging for me here. I've probably said this multiple times in this blog, but honestly it's tough and something that most people in peace corps that I've talked to face. If you have any suggestions about classroom discipline I'll take it. I will preface by saying since reading Punished by Rewards I can't bring myself to do stick and carrot methods, so I never make threats to my students. I impose consequences after the action has taken place and explain why I want the action to stop as a means for stopping it. This obviously isn't working for me, but I won't change to stick and carrot, so if you could give other options between the two it'd be appropriate. Secondly, my projects are starting and I couldn't be more exciting. Thanks to my mom the local AAUW is donating their leftover childrens' books to my school. THe problem is I have to find a way to get CHEAP shipping. Meest from my research is the best option. If there is anyone out there who is willing to donate money to have these books shipped to Ukraine please contact me via the comments and I will give you my mom's info and the book collection info! Also, my darien Book Aid order is still being processed. Hopefully we'll get some good books. Secondly, I started the beginnings of a project this week as I'm going to start writing a grant for my school to get help in funding for their gym building project. It will take about 3 months as I've calculated for me to write the grant and I will be only helping them do this project, but I'm excited about the process. It'll be a partnership grant basically pooling on my resources and networks back at home to help raise funds and money!!! Thirdly, I'm working on developing some teach-ins and workshops in conjunction with the opening of the gym. I'm hoping to pair up with teh other volunteer in Lviv and have his Physical Ed. Master's students come and run a Girls' Sports day. Gender empowerment and just general community building. THere's also another volunteer about two hours away hosting information on Special Needs concerns. I would really like to finance/bring two educators to one of his sessions. I'm hoping as more volunteers come around the area I can build a network of service opportunities for the kids at my school. My dream is not only to help their English, but a little civics and service can go a long way!

Section Two: Easter Preparations

So, Easter prep is in full swing. According to Ukrainian tradition this is the week to clear and clean out to prepare the way as it were. I've bought about 5 Ukrainian traditional eggs. Pictures to follow later. And I bought a traditional willow branch bundle instead of Palms for palm Sunday. It's fun to see the mood of everything change. I even have some days off of school this week and next (bonus!) I'll take what I can get let's be honest

Section Three: Discovering my city

I've been privileged the last couple weeks to have some visitors and people here give me time to explore my city. I've been as I said earlier walking more and appreciating what there was. But I've spent time with Dan and Lesya (I've talked before of my general love of them). They graciously got me information about a wonderful yoga studio here in Lviv where I can take two yoga lessons per week for a very small 150grv per month (equiv. of 20 dollars/month) and Dan also found some information about me being able to trade English/Ukrainian lessons, another huge boost to acclimating to life here. I can finally say I feel like I"m becoming a part of my city discovering markets, bazaars and bounds of other places with the help of people here has made my mood sky rocket that much more. Linda and I went on our Sunday walk today. We snaked through center and markets and parks. I just feel like every new corner of the city is a new place where I feel at home. Ukraine I don't think will fit like France did. But the more and more I'm here and living life on my own, making my own way, I feel better and better. Having Linda and Dan and Lesya and Scott along for the ride sure helps!

That's all for now, a long and wordy entry without pictures nonetheless. I'll try I'll try. As the weather gets nicer and the sun is out longer it'll be easier for me to do this. I'm thinking a daily walk around 4pm everyday is going to be a must.

loveall

The weekend was wonderful. My first successful train ride in Ukraine. I enjoyed the wonders of Platzkart which to be honest wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I took a train after my classes on Thursday and then had a run in with the trolley police. Well, not police but controllers. First my trolley didn't come. Then after walking to where my connection was I got on. I was a little flustered and well, I'm generally bad at punching my trolley ticket. Like I should definitely go to remedial punch my trolley ticket school. Nevertheless, the controllers showed up, told me my punch wasn't right. I insisted that I had bought the ticket and punched it there. The lady DID NOT believe me. I told her again that I had that I wasn't from Lviv, but that I had tried my best to do it. She again did not believe me pulling out her very thick glasses to check it and count the dots. She called her friend over, I acted like I was really upset about the whole ordeal repeating that I wasn't from Lviv. They eventually must have thought that no Ukrainian would've put up such a stink and let me go without a fee or any issues. For teh record, I did buy and punch the ticket that day, I'm just really really bad at punching trolley tickets. New skill list to acquire.

After that, I stopped to buy a drink from a lady at the train station and as I didn't have correct change and she being a place of business obviously had NO kopecks, she paid me my 45 kopecks of change in what, that's right strawberry candies. BONUS! a little bit like Christmas not going to lie. After a long wait for the train I have a habit of showing up to early because I get nervous about being late. I got on the train and enjoyed three hours of looking outside at the Ukrainian country side. Side bar: the snow in Lviv had melted giving way to spring, seeing earlier notes. I arrived in Ivano-Frankivsk to snow covered sidewalks much to my anti delight. Joe's bus ended up being late, um a lot late but we'll get to that. SO I took a taxi to John's house, the wonderful volunteer who put us up. I hung out with John a senior volunteer from the middle of Iowa who was fantastic and wonderful. Joe showed up at the place an hour and a half later. Turns out Joe was supposed to get in at 7 or so some Baba on his bus told him. Then when 705 came around he called me to tell me that she said they'd be another 20. Or she wrote down 20 and he wasn't sure if she meant 20 minutes or 8oclock. I waited until about 735 when joe texted to say I could leave if I wanted. Anyway, Joe arrived and it was great to catch up and have time with him just like cluster. SO, we were told some people would be getting in around 6am. Andy being the joy of life he is texted me at 4am asking me where I was. At 6am a head pokes into the room and who is it but an ELATED Andy at seeing Joe and I asleep in the room. Andy proceeds to first jump on Joe exclaiming, "oh my god it's Fluffy." and then heads for my bed. We woke up the next morning had great omelets and then headed to teh warden meeting. Always a joy to spend time with Serhiy Pashinskiy. After all the discussions, I told him I'd be willing to take on a project, sounds like I'll be doing something with a girl's guide to safety. Joe is doing a much cooler project on re-vamping the Emergency Locator Form.

After the meeting we went for waffles/lunch and then headed to bazaars while we waited for John to get back from a meeting. I had fun just wandering around talking and not talking to people. It made me realise as I was walking that everyone else was always looking for someone to walk with or follow. Unfortunately I was not born with this trait. Sometimes it seems like my ability to be just fine on my own can be detrimental. I can't help that I don't mind just being on my own. Life is what it is. On the good side, I got some fantastic gloves and learned the lesson, never settle for the over priced gloves on the stairs when there's probably a half expensive pair in the back stalls. Luckily, I got the back stall cheap gloves. Made John dinner and met Ruth and Alexis who were fantastic.

The next morning, Serhiy Pashinskiy drove us to Kolomiya where the other region had "meet your neighbor" I enjoyed the company of their region and most of all really felt like I was on a vacation for the first time in a long time. we stayed at a great b&b and I laughed teh whole time. I missed being with my boys; plus I met some really great people. The bed and breakfast in Kolomiya was fantastic and if you ever want to go to the Carpathian foothills in a cute town I recommend it. That night we went to dinner and bar where I had a great time and a russian guy grabbed my butt. Awesome. Spent the next day in town with Erin a volunteer from Zakarpatzka oblast who is organizing a half marathon that I'm volunteering at in April. Had a fantastic time. And then, I enjoyed the many joys of taking a late train back and fell asleep on the train. I was sitting up with my head resting against the side of teh car and I drooled down my sleeve, CLASSY! The guy across from me looked at me like I was nuts. So much for good impressions and cross cultural learning. Got home late and woke up to teach. Luckily, I got to sleep in a little.

Unfortunately, after my 3rd form class, they told me that my new counterpart is out sick as in in the hospital. Awesome, I'm a total curse on these teachers I swear. So, I'm covering her classes for who knows how long. That brings me to 21 hours of English (no more French since I'm covering all teh English classes) and then I'm doing 1 hour of English with my director and starting Friday will be doing one hour of English with the director of Education in Lviv. Work is work! Kids are good and bad, but nothing beats it when I feel like we're getting somewhere or they're learning. So that's life, a full schedule. Lots coming up actually. But I'll spare you the plan of the next few weeks. Also, the vice principal asked me to run a demo lesson for the other teachers of foreign language so that they can see my style of teaching, ask for details if you want to know but not something i'm going public with.

In other news, I hate teh fact that there was a freaking snow storm and now Lviv is once again covered in heavy wet dense snow. PLEASE SPRING COME PLEASE!

I liked this I will share it

Like you I

love love, life, the sweet smell

of things, the sky-blue

landscape of January days.

And my blood boils up

and I laugh through eyes

that have known the buds of tears.

I believe the world is beautiful

and that poetry, like bread, is for everyone.

And that my veins don't end in me

but in the unanimous blood

of those who struggle for life,

love,

little things,

landscape and bread,

the poetry of everyone.

Roque Dalton.

So another few weeks has passed at site. This week I feel like I was able to see a lot of the city bouncing between dates and meetings and just exploring.

More project ideas have come to mind and after lots of meetings I'm working on deciding what it is I really want to do/ can do and how to do that. The week started speaking with my director and now I'm going to be doing tutoring with both her and the director of education for the city of Lviv. An opportunity that while it benefits them in the language department will hopefully benefit me in the end in the networking department and what I am able to do with my two years. On Wednesday, I had teh opportunity to meet with a group of people at a catholic charity that I was introduced to by Irene. A great party and interesting presentation on VanGogh and great to meet new people who I will hopefully become hooked up with and can do things with! On Thursday, I met with Linda which is always a joy. Talking to Linda makes me want to do something with my service beyond just teaching English. She's a great role model for service and life in general and I hope that even though she's heading back to teh states in summer we can remain in contact. Friday was meet your neighbor. Saturday I explored teh city finding great things to do at teh bazaar and it left me wanting to explore every bazaar here. I found a great spice guy and had a hand mixed spice in a small paper envelope to take home (great!) what else, the markets are great and now that springs coming I can feel the excitement in everyone around me. On sunday nite I went and saw Madame Butterfly with Dan and Lesya and their guests. As always things are wonderful adn I'm happy. new pictures on my facebook of the town. things are getting busy and I cannot wait for things to start taking off. I remind myself every day that patience is a virtue and hopefully if I work hard I will be rewarded. An unexpected high moment and reward one of my students brought me a beautiful purple hyacinth plant for International Women's day celelbrated widely in Ukraine, so much so that I have the day off of school.

loveyou all

Here we are at the beginning of another month. It's hard to think where time goes. Perhaps I'll just start contemplating it in a Slaughterhouse Five cyclical kind of way and then nothing will seem to pass quickly but to go and come as moments might or should.

Where should I begin. My Regional Manager came and visited last Thursday. The visit went well. By all accounts my seventh form acted quite well in front of him. There were some outbursts and I know that they were putting on a brave face and liking what we were doing for the sake of getting it done because he was there. But despite my discipline issues with them it was a good visit. My Manager gave me some hints as to how to improve my teaching and what I could do to help with discipline and varied skill levels in the classroom. And then we talked with my director which was a really great talk. She expressed her thankfulness not only at having a full time volunteer but also at having me as their volunteer which was really great. I was finally able to thank them for all that they have done for me thus far. So, mission accomplished visit finished for the time being and thus happy Kari and happy school.

The weekend was quiet, finally, I finished the book my mom sent and am down to my last english language book, though we'll see how that pans out in the next couple weeks. Another volunteer says she's going to give me some so that could be great. The highlight was getting to talk to my family. As my parents are in Detroit this weekend I got passed around the breakfast table and loved hearing from everyone in teh room. Beyond that, let's see, had another meeting with my director and vice-director today. They asked me about teaching English to someone in teh community one or two hours per week. I, of course, said yes. And I'll be doing one hour of English teaching with my director as well per week. All of this is good, a nice and varied schedule will keep me going and moving. I do best when I'm working a lot, well maybe not too much. But I do need things to keep me busy so I don't fall into a rut. The best thing for me is to have to work my hours right in a row. nevertheless, they also let me know that the cleaning lady is going to be coming into my place once a week to clean everything for me, vacuum, wash the bathroom etc. More reason for me to keep a tidy household instead of waiting til I have the time to actually get the cleaning done. I feel so spoiled, they often cook for me and now the cleaning. I told them that I did it on my own, they lured me in with the prospect of having it vacuumed once per week and then added that she'd also be cleaning other things as well. I'm trying to accept their graciousness by paying them back by working for them as much as possible in many domains.

Let's see what else. . . the discipline is still an issue and it makes me feel like a bad teacher. I'm trying not to let it get me down and help my students with something that only I can do with them. And so this month in 7th form is pronunciation month. I'm coming up with different pronunciation games and activities to try and help the accent. Unfortunately, i feel like I'm going to be met with some resistance. Each week this month, I'm going to be giving them a tongue twister to memorize. They will be able to read it on Monday/Tuesday with me and then will present it to the class on Friday, my hope is to have them turn into teachers. So that when they present the tongue twister on Friday they will have the class repeat it after them and then they will be able to help the class with their pronunciation as I have helped them. In between the time when I am helping each student I'm going to try and get different listening activities or something like this that the students can do. . . . we'll see it's still in the nest of my thinking.

A big long journal entry about pedagogical things, what can I say. The snow is melting and I'm crossing my fingers that this is it, this is spring. I can see pavement and ground, but there are still plenty of snow mounds. The school dog has taken to sleeping outside my room/apartment, I'm going to buy him some dog treats this week. He scratches the outside mat and groans when he wants me to come out and pet him.

Well, love and hugs to all.

So, perhaps this is my first reflection on ukrainian culture and language without coming from my own experience. here goes. . .

A Reflection on the names of Ukrainian months which fills my head probably more than it should.

So, the month of February is called лютий seemingly coming from the word (or at least to a non native speaker) любити which means to love. Which again could make my interpretation of it more skewed because obviously, I think this is related to St. valentine's Day or perhaps a tradition of love giving in February that is now linked to St. valentines. The Next month is березень or the month of the birch tree (I think!) And as I've been told it is in this month that you tap the Birch tree or as my host sister called it the tree that weeps for their juice (which is by the way delicious) my host family canned it and added lemon and it was fantastic. Next comes квітень, квітка being the word for flower. I suppose here it's March showers bring April flowers. . . Followed closely by May otherwise known as травень the month of herbs. After that I'm not too well acquainted other than the months I've lived here. So, November is лістопад (falling leaves) and October is жовтень yellow month. Feeling poetic yet? The Russian months from what I know follow closely to the numerical roman months that we're used to. While difficult to memorize given the fact that they are completely unrelated to numbers I much prefer the agricultural lean to the calendar of the Ukrainian language. It makes me wonder if in earlier times жовтень wouldn't have been different for each section of the Ukrainian speaking world. How long would these months last? Sometimes longer than others depending on the year or season? And when would you know that you were making that slight transition into the next. This lack of definite subdivision given by the numerical leaning calendar of our own leans itself to teh idea of Ukrainian time in general. My students are hardly ever in a rush and while they apologize when they are late, they rarely arrive early to anything. It's not that I prefer one way over the other. I will always be awkwardly early fearing that being late is causing my host or guests etc. undue concern and anxiety. But at the same time, I enjoy that there is something of a lax nature of time here. While I can't quite reconcile my own tendencies with the nature of time that I prefer, it still makes me think of a culture so rooted in its perceptions of teh world around it that it's months were given the names of the natural world around it. It may sound a little romantic and in osome ways I'm sure I'm romanticizing it. But I also just adore the visuals that come with knowing the name of the month. I like that when I think of October here, I will always think of teh yellow leaves littering the streets on my way to language class with my cluster mates in Nosivka. Similarly, I know that as these months pass it will be the natural world often that provides the backdrop and reason of my memory. Without sounding overly simplistic, I think language when wrapped in an idea to transport the platonic ideal of yellowness to the name of the month is really quite true to its form. I think that when you can wrap all the things yellow can be into the idea of a month it translates into the world around you and exudes that yellowness through structure or otherwise. In the end, after thinking about this development of language I thought to myself that I should reconcile the calendars I've been making with the names of the month, and so I'm including a picture of my march calendar featuring none other than birch trees.

In news about school, if you'd like it. . . My regional manager will be here on Thursday visiting my classes, meeting with me and the directors and inspecting my place to make sure I've completed my checklist. I'm nervous. He will be observing my 7th form class and I'm nervous about their behaviour. I know I'm not doing something right with them, they're acting out all the time. I'm looking for ways to improve my teaching with them and maybe having Bohdan visit them will push me to create something that will constantly keep them activated and engaged, but it's hard with the varying skill levels present in the classroom. Apart from that, I did create a lesson based on listening using some pop music which they loved. We listened to a song and i had them count every time they heard the words busy, telephone and call/calling. It was really interesting to see how close they were to my counts that I had heard when I listened to the song. Beyond that, we talked about why they may have heard the word too many times or why they didn't hear it enough. Sparking an interesting discussion about listening to people and things when speaking in a foreign language. And then, they were really excited and happy to have been able to understand some of the words as we dissected the lyrics a little bit more. The highlight was when they all at the end of class were able to sing along to the song using the correct words without ever seeing them in front of them! My third grade class has been altogether this week because the other teacher is out sick. They get excited to be all together, but what is more is that the class always likes to show me what they've accomplished, showing me what they do and when they finish their written work. They just like learning English and I'm happy to be their teacher. Today, one of my students who is particularly fond of my teaching gave me a hug and then turned to one of the other students in teh other group and said "Isn't my teacher Cool!" And today, I feel like I made some good break throughs with my first graders, while it's really hard to handle them as a class, they've been writing and reading better and better. I'm not sure what my end of the year goals for them are. But they know their numbers, they know their letters, they know their colours. and we're working slowly on days of the week; over, under, on. And now my and 's ownership. At the very least, I got more hugs in first grade today. I have two twin boys one who is super excited for English named Buroslav and one who is not excited for English but is excited to show me his new toy named Yaroslav. Buroslav as always delights in calling me over and saying "teacher I'm finished" or "Miss kari, I wrote it!" And today one of teh boys in my class who I think may be autistic and/or have special needs has decidedly begun to trust me and gives me hugs and wants to hold my arm and when I come over and tell him no today he said ok ok I'll listen now. So, today, despite having its frustrating moments there were some really good ones too. For this I'm grateful. I still miss everyone in the states and am gearing up for the next few weeks of meetings. ugh! But at teh same time there are great things coming out of these meetings.

So that's all for now, love and hugs!

The joys of a package on a broken, weary soul.

Today, my friends I received a glorious package from my parents. After a long hard day of teaching kids who are generally uninterested in learning, I find that a package will delight and tickle my soul. And so, here is a props to my parents for a complete restocking of pants in my wardrobe. I officially have thrown out all full-length pants i brought with me in exchange for new ones, that happen to fit better. Also, props for the fact that my mom stocked me with the Stromberg family Best of 2009 mix. First of all, Cheryl is a genius for coming up with this idea when I was in France. This being our third annual mix, I'm excited that I will be back for the 5th annual where I am hoping we can add a category like best song from the last five years you wish you would've put on the list but didn't because you found out about it after the new year. etc. etc. This mix is filling my life with great new music and great new moods.

And now, for more news about ukraine and the like. My kids have gotten used to me being here and being their teacher. It's amazing how quickly kids adapt to those kinds of things, it's amazing how quickly I've adapted to this. I requested a set of books today from my director so that i can lesson plan appropriately. And I've started giving tests etc. etc. etc. in the next few months I feel like all will be passing quickly, sometimes too quickly. The snow is . . . not melting. what else can I say. probably not much

love and hugs to you all

An Account of a weekend of Valentine in Drohobych. . .

Despite what you all may be thinking, I really don't like to travel. That is I LOVE going to new places and seeing new things, but I hate the "getting there." When I can, I try and stay as comfortable as possible in my own surroundings. But, of course, the want to see new things and calling from friends and family will often push me out of said comfort zone aka my house or town and make me bite the bullet and do the actual "travelling."

This past weekend, was one of said trips when I ventured to visit Drohobych. To be honest, it's not that bad of a trip especially by Ukrainian standards. It takes approximately 1 hour or a bit more to get from my bus stop to the main bus station from where the buses to drohobych leave. Upon my arrival, I followed the directions I was given, bought a ticket from the 3rd cash register and loaded teh bus ignoring the place listed on my ticket and just picking, because no one really follows those listings anyway. Unfortunately, being a Friday nite the bus was packed. And so, when a man who had bought a ticket got on the bus and there were no seats left he made who ever was in his seat move. And so, boy and girl from the seats moved. Next comes teh two people in their seats who had to get up and move and consequently made me and the girl next to me move. I go up to the front where everyone assumes being that I don't speak ukrainian well, that I'm the one without the ticket. Not the case. I show them my ticket. And after saying sixteen times that I have seat 3 they agree with me; because they read my ticket. Only problem is girl in seat 3 is not having it and is not going to get out of my seat and keeps saying, well I have seat two and those boys are in my seat. After awhile and a lot of yelling on the part of the driver who was explaining that someone must be without a ticket. 3 girls get up in the back and get off teh bus because surprise surprise they don't have a ticket. I get the bad seat in the back because 3rd seat homie wont stand up and I don't want to cause a scene. As you can guess there was more than just me trying to figure it out becuase there were 3 people without tickets. Me, a girl, and surprise surprise my seat neighbor a 18 year old boy drenched in cologne with a penchant for falling asleep on my shoulder. This bus ride lasts another 2 hours. I get to Drohobych, taking the only marshrustka available to where linnea says I should, "look for a gaudy orange building." I don't see said building but the stop was teh end of the line. Luckily, upon getting out I saw what I thought was a gaudy orange building (good description). Linnea and I proceed to get groceries at the store where I almost knocked down the baggage drop cabinets trying to shove my backpack into it, an older lady yelled at linnea to move out of the way of teh cheese, and the homie at teh check out didn't understand when i asked for a plastic bag. Actually, the trip/weekend was good, it was just we had bad luck with weather and travelling. So, the next day after a stunning walk around town in the snow, seeing some old wooden churches that were fantastic and enjoying a tour of 6 sentences and time for me to ask questions in the church built in the 15th century; we headed to Truskavets, Linnea's other town. That bus ride was like getting to know people on a whole new level. We squeeeeeeezed in and stood in the front enjoying the many joys of a marshrutka so crowded someone on the outside has to shut the door. It's a little bit like zipping an overfull suitcase. Except we're people and it's oddly uncomfortable to be touched and squeezed against that many people you don't know. So, we took the another marshrut in town to what we thought was the mall, but what ended up being a supermarket with Everything a person from teh states could want. Hot chocolate in many different flavours, bulk grains, garlic powder and curry. (bonus find!) We returned to drohobych and went to a nice english pub and enjoyed some french fries. And spent a quiet evening at the house. In the end the trip was great. I still hate going on busses (the bus rides back were less eventful but still bus rides). But I think that the pay off for knowing that I'm using public transportation equals it out. I love trains (for teh most part) and I really love the trams and trolleys here in Lviv. These forms of public transport are easily my favourite. I'm hoping my years here will convert me to a person who will go on any transport in the states because I can stand anything.

In other news, I bought oregano at teh store in Truskavets and made a fantastic spicy italian soup tonite. The 8th grade class is going to interview me for some reason. Still teaching the 1st, 3rd and 7th form. Still am in desperate need of stickers. My students waver and I tihnk the school wants me to start doing some kind of English club for teachers or adults. we'll see. My counterpart has officially left teh school so I'm looking for a new one. AND other than that I read a lot last week. Am hoping to do the same this week and yes I'm still looking for books. The snow has forced me mostly indoors and I'm thinking about heading to center this week to pick up some yarn so I can crochet a baby blanket for some friends here who are having a baby in April. They have really welcomed me and I'm looking for a way to show my gratitude via baby present. I'm so excited for the melting season. . .

Missed the family and friends this week! Love you all and hugs!

Hello to everyone in the wonderful world of blog land.

things are as always going really well here. I'm enjoying the wonderful world of Ukrainian winter and the snow, which I'm ready to get rid of, but accepting as a part of the general existence here. Still, the thought of summer tends to creep in my head and I can't help but think of all the things that will be possible once the snow is gone and I'm able to walk wherever and spend time outside.

This week, life has been pretty standard. I've been teaching, as per usual, and just kind of taking time to lesson plan etc. This week we had visitors from AISEC, which I believe is some sort of students exchange program for people from different countries who speak english to run programs in other countries, again, in English. So, we had visitors from Turkey, Brazil and Taiwan come and visit our school and let the kids know about different countries etc. etc.

Suzanne came down to visit today. Had a wonderful time walking around the city despite the cold and enjoying the company for the late afternoon.

I'm making progress with my 3rd formers, something that bolsters my confidence if only a little bit. I also successfully taught my 1st formers under over and on and so we're working on questions like where is the ball.

At the urging of my mother, I'm updating the wish list on the right. so take a look.

What else can I say. . . big day tomorrow. Elections here, don't know which candidate will win. I live in the west and so Timonshenko is favoured here, but who knows what the outcome will be.

The best part about tomorrow is it's burrito cooking nite at Dan and Lesya's with Linda and Christie Anne, so I'm happy for even more company.

Let's see what insights can I leave. Peace Corps time passes quickly and it often seems as if nothing is really going on. I like to take moments each day to think about what i could've done better and also what I did raelly well. No matter how boring or self-indulgent it seems. I finished reading Bill Moyer's on Democracy this week, lent to me by another volunteer. It's filled with quotes that make you want to get up and do something. I try to remind myself that in my own small way I am doing something. It's amazing how much you can trick yourself into thinking you've never done anything. By Ukrainian standards, I'm an old maid. I'm 25 years old, no husband, no kids and no long term job. I kind of bounce around doing whatever. But I tell myself that the whatevers that I've been doing for however long are, despite the fact that my life is small, still salient and important. i think we all crave to be the big person every now and again. To have the personality and power to influence others and make a difference in how things happen. We fantasize about what we would be doing if only guaranteed the appearance in some cataclysmic or climactic moment. The truth is, I've thought, more than once about sending a letter to obama about my reflections on America living my post college career out of the country. I tihnk in some ways, I've forgotten that even though I'm not a HUGE personality, I'm still doing something that is worthwhile. this isn't to say I question my peace corps decision in anyway. I'm more than committed to my work and school life here. But, I will say, working in Education can wear you down, I suppose working in any field can, and some days when nothing seems to sink in it's hard to remember why you're trying to teach anyone anything.

On a more positive note, I've finished 13 books in my 19/20 weeks here. I'm grateful for teh simplicity and the time that my life offers. There's nothing quite like knowing that you will have the time to enrich your soul and mind.

FOr teh first time this week I rode a mashrutka at rush hour. mistake, I've been squeezed in ways I never thought possible and now have a thorough sympathy for sardines and chinese acrobats in boxes.

love and hugs to all

this is a simple simple blog to one give a shout out to Dena aka Deener who sent me a glorious package.

And to the staff at Hill Middle School especially one Ms. Sue Johnson who organized getting a card together with letters from my old co-workers! It really made teh day to have some notes from home!

In other news, parents meetings are this week. Which means that I awkwardly wait in my apartment while they have meetings in the cafeteria.

Also, this week is AISEC week aka a group of young people from all over the world come to lead different activities and meetings with my students in English. yesterday, I did some hosting, but today I had a French lesson with my 5th graders. Who I think beleive I'm teh funniest person who has ever lived. They are pretty much alone in this department, other than my mom, who mostly just laughs at my misery and not necessarily my jokes. In fact, that's a common theme amongst people who are close to me. . . perhaps my tries at sympathy are laughable, skill to work on, looking more pathetic so people will do things for me to comfort me. Such as, giving me free vacations.

Peace Corps gave us all the "awesome" gift of an extra day of leave! woo! why you ask are we graced with such an awesome gift. Oh it's because we all got vaccinated for H1N1 within the end of the month (nothing says vacation like swine flu vaccines). I'm currently undecided as to what to do with said day off. First, I have to figure out when my vacations are, hard to do, because asking is awkward. next, I have to plan a vacation. I'm thinking about Turkey with some friends. Because it's cheap and quick and well, nothing says I need a vacation like Turkey.

Today, I had another interesting encounter with the lady who runs the kitchen and cleaning in school. Something along the lines of her telling me that the Baker didn't bring the bread today and so when I was eating my soup there wasn't any. I told her this wasnt' a problem. She joked about the weight I've been losing here. She kept doing an action like she was a synchronized swimmer or beauty queen just come out of the water. She made another joke about one of something, i didn't really get it. I really dont' understand a good half of my life here, but I've adjusted to not knowing/having any clue about what's going on around you and just kind of going with the I mean I guess this is teh right way to do things flow.

I had a dream I owned a scooter. . . one to get around in teh states, I wasn't there but I remember making the comment about me getting the scooter specifically for life in the states. I also thought about 20 minutes today about the state of my parents compost pile (I don't know if this is dedication to teh compost and/or extreme amounts of free time that plague most volunteers) I considered no short of 200 different ways to improve it, what the earthworms that my parents say are the size of boas look like how they're effecting the ph of the soil etc. etc. etc. how to work in more animal matter into the compost. . . This is an odd manifestation of home sickness if that's what it is. But over teh next two years, I've decided to dedicate some time to reading about productive/the best ways to compost and raising chickens. . . . don't judge

that's all for teh random thoughts of the day love and hugs

This week has been filled with unexpected engagements dates fun and all the other things that come with unexpected. The weather, in case national Ukrainian forecast doesn't reach the US, has been well, cold, to say the very least. We've been at about -20 celsius, that's -4F without the windchill, and I mean while It's not the coldest I've ever experienced in my life it's cold. And normally as I awkwardly try to tell people in Ukrainian when they ask me if it's cold like this in America, I say, yes, but the buildings are warm, which happens to not be the case here. However, Eternal gratefulness to my school director who sent (via the cleaning lady) a nice warm wool filled or even synthetic I'm not sure, comforter that has increased my warmth by leaps and bounds. Also, in case you didn't know, I saw my breath in bathroom this week. That's right on the inside.

Well, a lot has happened this week. It's hard to really summarize. I think I'm landing on my feet in some respects with my classes, though we'll see what my role will be once my counterpart returns. At teh very least I'm loving LOVING my French classes and am so grateful to be teaching that. I honestly think I'm a better French teacher than English teacher but there it is. Let's see, saw a fantastic performance last night at the Philharmonic of a dual showing of Four seasons, One, being of course Vivaldi's and the other being Astor Piazzolla, a tango writer! Both fantastic with amazing violin soloists and amazing company!

Let's see other than that I think I'll hold off on everything else so as not to ruin the skyping I'll be doing this weekend, namely with my parents.

I would like to send out awesome all-star awards to the following: My parents, Amabelle Smith, and Kyle Bladow for sening my packages filled with love and goodies from home. I just sent out a batch of letters to the states so hopefully those will be arriving soon. And among the next batch will be thank yous for all of these kiddies. I'm sufficiently stocked on Irish Breakfast tea thanks to Ama and Kyle to last me through any amount of time!

love and hugs to you all

Here's a quote I found in Bill Moyer's On Democracy, lent to me by a fellow PCV.

I've made it the official goal of my service in a esoteric theoretical way.

Things are going good. Big surprise it's cold. I'm cold, my apartments cold, I deal by wearing clothes, lots of clothes, like maybe about as many clothes as I wear in a week in the states in one sitting. It's normal no worries. Spring is coming and so is heat where I'll probably write about how many clothes I'm not wearing because it's so hot.

Michael Ventura from Letters at 3 a.m.

"The dream we must now seek to realize, the new human project, is not 'security,' which is impossible to acheive on the planet earth in the latter half of teh 20th century. It is not 'happiness,' by which we generally mean nothing but giddy forgetfulness about the danger of all our lives together. It is not 'self-realization,' by which people usually mean a separate peace. There is no separate peace. . . The real project is to realize that technology has married us all to each other, has made us one people on one planet, and that until we are more courageous about this new marriage - ourselves all intertwined - there will be no peace and the destination of any of us will be unknown. How far can we go together . . . men and women, black, brown, yellow, white, young and old? We will go as far as we can because we must go wherever it is we can go together. There is no such thing as going alone. Given the dreams and doings of our psyches, given the nature of our world, there is no such thing as being alone. If you are the only one in the room it is still a crowded room. But we are all together of this planet, you, me, us: inner, outer, together, and we're called to affirm our marriage vows. Our project, the new human task, is to learn how to consummate, how to sustain, how to enjoy the most human marriage - all parts - all of us."

Let's tell a story about how when I came to Ukraine people said I would have a host mom during training and a host mom (maybe) when I got to site. Now let's tell the reality about my many Ukrainian mothers and the different role each one takes.

First and foremost there's momma Nina. My host mom in Nosivka. Momma Nina helped me adjust to Ukraine, cooked me tasty Ukrainian food, helped me learn to can things and make compot, and made me less afraid of really scary root cellars when she made me go down there during the power outage to get pickles and juice for my guy friends that were over. Now, Momma Nina fills the roll of far away mother who tells you you need to visit all the time, asks you what you're eating, and then tells you good job for managing to cook chicken. I Love Momma Nina and even though it seems every time she calls I'm in some awkward situation where picking up the phone is not an option she calls back two or three times in succession to give me a chance. Every time she calls it brightens my day and I miss Nosivka a little, but I miss Momma Nina more. Plus she's a hoot! No one makes me laugh more than Momma Nina when she's making fun of Bucks the cat.

Secondly, we have my director here at my new school, who when I see her wants me to eat whatever it is she has with her this day and spends time with me while I eat it and makes English conversation with me. I don't see her that often, to tell you the truth, but when I do it feels like someone's on my team, like someone cares about how I'm doing and that makes being abroad a little less scary.

Thirdly, if I can clump I will try we have the two vice-principals at my school. Who always say hello always ask if I'm cold in my apartment if I need anything if the classes are going well if I'm getting enough sleep. They are peaches and again always ready to back them up. Recently, when I was having problems with one of my classes one of them came down and fought for me and told the kids what was what. While I realize that I cant depend on her for discipline again feeling like someone is in your corner is beyond enough for teh day to day struggles that come up.

Fourthly, there is teh woman in charge of housekeeping and the cooks in teh kitchen. They continuously ask me why I am not eating the hot lunch they provide at school. The real reason I don't go every day is not becaues it's not tasty but because every time I try to pay they won't let me and they tell me the director said I shouldn't pay. But I feel bad because peace corps gives me money to afford my own food and so I don't want to take advantage of their unending generosity. THey've gotten me up to eating in there at least once a week if not twice after some strong talkings to from teh head of housekeeping, who when last nite I told her I had sandwiches in my room, she said that's not a hot meal and doesn't count. She's also the peach who wanted to take my bedding and wash it for me. I told her I wash my clothes on my own in my shower so she brought me a bucket and a stool to put it on so I didn't have to bend down to wash. Again, totally wonderful and nice. They also ask me if I'm cold all the time, do we sense a reoccurring theme?

Fifth and Finally, we have another English teacher. Who brings me jams and is going to bring me wine and she always wants to talk to me and is convinced that I will find, in her words, "the other half of the apple" and will marry a Ukrainian man (who are in her words splendid) and that she will thusly be invited to the wedding. Sometimes I think she just likes to see me laugh awkwardly when she brings it up. I tell her I'm too young to be a bride, she seems to think otherwise. But she always makes me smile and feel welcome.

So, there they are, my Ukrainian moms, the ladies who day to day ask me if I'm cold, hungry or looking for a husband. I will say, I love the kids here, although yesterday was a hard day. I do love the students and their enthusiasm to see something new, but these ladies make my stay all the nicer all the warmer and all the easier to transition.

Tonite, in a fit of daring, of teh not at all kind of way, I'm going to the theatre with two other teachers at school who have lovingly adopted me and I hope will be good friends. We are going to see Gogol's the marriage, in ukrainian, I probably will understand perhaps 3 minutes of the hour and a half show, but hey, I'm up for anything and am telling myself not to say no to any invitation.

Miss you all. love and hugs

After indulging myself at only one page of Perez Hilton I found out Kate McGarrigle died. more reasons for my parents to have folk as their theme next year at the waffle extravaganza.

So here we are, exactly 31 days into my time at site. How has it gone? Well enough, but I'm hoping it will go better. Not that it's bad because of anything here. I just want to do more, to be better, etc. The many lamentations of a person too self-critical to ever see any success (or in desperate want of flattery). Either way, no flattery needed, I'm working towards better things.

Let's see. Nothing seems more illusive to me over these past months than summer. Since finding out I was coming here to Ukraine, every one has said over and over here that summers are a magical time filled with an open spirit of welcome, fun, revelry and an abundance of fresh fruits and vegetables better than anything you can imagine. As the days are cold and generally short (though I notice a marked difference in teh amount of sunlight that is out per day), I find myself dreaming about the mythical wonder that could or will be summer. I think about bazaars and days spent in the parks walking wherever I want to go and not slipping on ice or freezing my nose hairs. Most days I feel like summer is a fairy tale they tell us to get us through the winter that it really can't be this good. but everyone seems in agreement. And for what americans have in yearning for summer ukrainians can trump them in spades or any other suit. It's as if the whole of ukrainian spirit is directly in line with the season. In winter covered and bundled so no one can see you and summer, well i don't know. but it souns pretty great. So there it is an entry aout nothing I know but the promise of something.

In other news, I'm headed to the a play all in ukrainian this sat (wish me luck) by Gogol annnnd I'm headed to the philharmonic on the 28th for a dual playing of four seasons one vivaldi and one (a ukrainian I think composer of accordian fame)

Well, it's back to the wonderful world of school year time. Unfortunately, my school braek passed by too quickly and now it's back to teaching. I used to think that France made me low key. That I learned to just kind of go with the flow while I was there because nothing was really bad enough to get worked up over. That's the thing, in France, that was the case I rolled with things because there weren't any waves or upsets or anything like this.

Ukraine, on the other hand, is a master's class on how to roll with the chaos wave and just move past everything that may have been a problem for you in the past. My week started out in what I thought would be a quiet manner. As far as I knew, my counterpart wouldnt' be at school and I would be observing some more until the vice-principals had conferenced and gotten my schedule together. This however was not the case. I ended up teaching that day with only 5 minutes notice. and at the moment, I know I have classes to teach next week. I have no idea what they are what teh subject is or when I'll be teaching. And so, like the zen part I knew was in me somewhere I'm accepting this and moving on and riding the chaos wave. And telling myself I'm a good enough teacher to fake it til I make it when it comes to the first lessons and until my schedule is cemented at least for teh week. This is a quality Ukrainians have down pat and I'm jealous. I mean I think it's good. To be able to just let things happen as they will, while some would argue is less efficient takes a tremendous amount of stress away and forces you to at teh very least trust yourself if no one else. This breeds general awesomeness and so i am happy that I will be in teh boot camp of developing this skill for the next two years.

This weekend some PCVs are coming to hang and socialize as per usual PCV fashion. I'm excited to see the homies and happy that I'll be able to. I've been hanging out with more people and enjoying the fact that someday this snow will melt and I'll have a completely walkable city!!!

In other news, let us have a moment of silence for the fact that I opened my back-up and consequently last stick of American deodorant today. This item has now been put on the critical red level of things I would love to have sent to me. It's a little bit like the warning levels of safety in America, but more light hearted and somehow less trivial (excuse me if this offends). I'm going to put it out there I feel like my need for deodorant has a greater concrete meaning to it than the safety levels in the states, but hey that's me.

OH YEAH! I'm sending out letters, SOON. So if you want to be on the mailing list send me a note and I'll put a letter in the box your way sometime between now and the end of June.

Here's to winter time, resolution steadfastness and general awesomeness of surroundings and people

lovetoyouall

And here we are. . . It's officially the 6th of January and the eve of Ukrainian Christmas. I am hanging out in the school relaxing and thinking about all the cool things that this Christmas might entail but then it really doesn't feel like christmas and I'm enjoying sketching and reading much more than taking to the streets in teh very cold weather. SO, what's new, exciting? I had a wonderful new Years with a few other volunteers. We celebrated in grand style here in Lviv ringing in the New Year in teh center of town right by the opera house and new years tree.

Now I'm enjoying the wonders of vacation. Since Christmas is later our winter break goes after new years not before so while all the kiddies in teh states are rushing back to the work, I'm enjoying the free time that you all had before. Pretty soon I'll start thinking about planning for my classes too.

My mood is good, I'm finally excited to start teaching the kiddos as soon as break is over. I've enjoyed a good run just observing classes and now the work will begin as with teh new semester comes a schedule of things to do! I'm also looking into brainstorming with my director on things that I would like to do in teh future for projects.

I'm thinking about finally caving in and buying a bucket. It's not that I don't like doing my laundry in my platform shower, I mean I do even if it does take me three days to wash my very small wardrobe, actually half of my very small wardrobe. But the idea of soaking my clothes in detergent is pretty swanky. The fact that this excites me is somewhat depressing, only because it's a sure sign that the effect in living in Ukraine took a rapid change on my mental processing that I didn't necessarily expect to happen so quickly.

In other news, I'm reading The Omnivore's Dilemma by Michael Pollan. An old book which I'm sure all you cool hipsters have already read. Either way it makes me want to either a. get an internship at polyface farms or b. be a grass farmer.

Also, if you will notice to the right. Is my newly updated wish list. I think the best way to send things is the flat rate mailers by the USPS, only use USPS for mailing things because then it doesn't have to be inspected. You'll find my address on a prior entry if you feel so inclined!

LOVE YOU ALL

A christmas holiday in three parts:

I: Christmas day. I spent the day observing classes in school and then was able to watch a christmas program put on by the younger kids. After the program I got everything ready and took an hour mashrutka ride to Susnivka a village an hour north where I enjoyed a fantastic dinner party with a fellow volunteer in community development annnd her ukrainian co-workers. We laughed, ate, drank limoncello and vodka and had a fabulous time.

II: the day after christmas. I return to Lviv opting to walk home from teh bus station (good choice) the snow was melting and it was puddly and beautiful and there was much teh fresh air. I hung out and skyped with the family in the afternoon and then puttered around the house. Until later in the evening where I dropped my beautiful terabyte harddrive which is now out of commission. I'm taking donations for a new one. My parents called again at 4 in teh morning and I got to hear a little from Amanda my college room mate and the other kiddos in the house. Very very nice.

III: Two days after christmas. I hung out doing chores in teh day like shopping getting ready for a party and other stuff. I did some more laundry etc. etc. etc. ANd then went to Linda's house where I met lots of cool and interesting people and had a fabulous time with fabulous food. I did walk to Linda's which again good choice for teh walk but bad choice forgetting my directions. I got a little lost but nothing too horrible. It ended up taking me an hour and a half to get there instead of about the hour or 1:15 it should have but I'm ok with that. I had a fantastic time. I enjoyed a cab ride back (15 hrivs) aka a third of my daily allowance but worth it for the luxury of a car ride at 10pm. I talked to the homies at the house again on skype and enjoyed a wonderful evening.

With the crashing of my hard drive I've begun to get really creative with my time as i can't sit down and watch a 30 min tv show or movie everyday. I'm budgeting myself with books, draw, clean, read and have started doing pilates and tae bo as they're the only videos I had teh sense to drag over to my computer and aren't on my hard drive. I'm looking into the exciting world of theraband exercises that the peace corps gave us. I haven't brought much else in teh way of hobbies other than crosswords which I'm planning on doing tonite. But we'll see how exciting things can get. I'm on a 45 griv (aka about 6 dollar budget) for each day. So I can't really go and buy things to help me with my hobbies. I have a crochet hook but no yarn. I brainstorm a lot. Any ideas are gladly appreciated. Especially as on Thursday vacation starts and I won't even have classes to fill my days for at least half of it.

Love you all!

Hope all of you that celebrate are having a wonderful time with family and friends.

I have successfully completed one whole week here at my new site. I've started meeting the kids, and I forgot how much a small child saying hello to you and making the effort to speak English when it's not their native language can brighten your day. Either way, I'm really happy at the new school meeting new teachers. My vice principal even brought me some delicious home made pickles one day. I feel so very safe and taken care of here. Tomorrow, I'm venturing on my first small travel to a village called Susnivka to visit a volunteer there for Christmas. And hopefully, I'll get back on Saturday so that I can go to another christmas party on Sunday with people here in L'viv.

Part Two: New Adventures of Kari and the modern conveniences she lives without.

Today for the first time in my peace corps service I washed my clothes by hand. yes folks that's right by hand. And I didn't even have a bucket or a tub. I have a platform shower and I washed my clothes right in there. Granted at the moment they're hanging on my radiators and other doors in my bathroom to dry. This was my Christmas Eve accomplishment. So while you all are sidled up next to teh fires in your homes I'm hanging with my fresh clean laundry and a crossword puzzle loving life and missing my family.

Part Three: Where Kari learns about Great Britain via the amazing cultural source that is the 8th grade textbook.

Nothing says I love English speaking culture like reading a textbook about learning English. I always like to see the differences between what I find in my own actual experience and what the textbook describes. This being said the characters in my French textbook in high school were pretty lame. And most of the people I know can agree about their foreign language texts. However, here at my school we have pretty recent books aka published after 2000. I mean let's be honest they aren't the most acurate and they are concentrated on Great Britain but I'll take it. My favourite quote being one describing the differences between the types of bands you listen to and how to tell if you're rap, pop, indie, metal etc. The indie description: you listen to new british bands that not everyone likes. you buy your clothes at a street fair or second hand store (this makes me laugh) the Rap description: You listen to black bands. You wear bright sunglasses and a hat. (this makes me laugh harder). All in all, I probably couldn't encapsulate the essence of those musical and thus cultural styles in a sentence, but I can't help but get a good giggle out of what was presented.

well happy ribbons and decoration and all that. I miss you all ! xx

Hello everyone! Well, it's official i'm sworn in as a peace corps volunteer and I'm at my new site!! so, the drum roll for all including me last week is where is my new site. WELL, I live in LVIV! Not many of you know about Lviv, understandable, i don't know anything really. Other than the fact that, when I was doing research about Ukraine i found all these articles about the interesting and artful city in the west.

for the record here's my new address:

Kari Stromberg

м. Львів

бул. Липиського 16

індекс 79058

Ukraine

So, what can i tell you in only a few short minutes? i live in an apartment attached to the cantine/cafeteria of the school where all my basic needs are met. The staff here is wonderful and friendly and glad to have me and I'm glad to have them as well. My room is cold, but beyond anything I could have hoped for. I'm grateful to have running hot water and a flush toilet and use of the cafeteria kitchen when i need to cook. They provide me with everything including letting me use the school internet whenever i need. I am the luckiest PCV this side of the Dniper. So, in short, I'm happy I'm excited and I'm spending my birthday today with the PCV in my town who has been here for three years as I venture out and try to navigate the bus system to get to the center of town using limited ukrainian.

love and hugs to all

Here it is, my last blog before heading to Kyiv for swearing-in and site announcement where I will become a so-called official peace corps volunteer.

Not much has changed in the last few days, only that I wanted to post some pictures before time ran out. Oh yes, well, I've passed all my tests save for one big one tomorrow. The Language Proficiency Interview. Other than that, life moves and undulates and keeps me busy and I continually miss you all.

Here's a pic of my host family to keep things interesting: that's my host father Yuri, host mom nina and host sister Nastiya

So, I'm coming down to my last week in training here in Nosivka. I will soon be leaving the comfort of my host family, cluster and overly planned schedule and will be heading into the real unknown.

Yesterday, I went to the "Big" city of нижин with Linnea in search for shoes as mine, (the ones babusiya took earlier) are falling apart. The thing about it is, I have big feet. even for the US, I mean a size ten is pretty standard and you can find it anywhere, but still selections etc. can be limited. I knew coming into the Ukraine deal, as I did going in to France, that finding shoes to fit my said large feet would not be easy. But I had been lead to believe that if I made the trip to the big city I would be able to have said larger sized shoes. So, let us begin with getting to the city. We got off at what we thought was THE bazaar, turns out it was a tiny bazaar about a 30 minute walk away from teh bazaar we really wanted to go to. This being said, we walked the rest of teh way to the bazaar, no big deal. Along the way, a woman walking by us tripped, in my sadistic humor of laughing at her, instant karma came along and I ALMOSt, and by almost I mean my foot was less than an inch away, I almost stepped on a dead cat. Yes, a dead cat, on the sidewalk. I took this as well as one can when they almost step on a dead cat. I will say that the day was considerably better than if I had actually stepped on dead cat. All the same, I have learned my lesson in indulging my desire to laugh at others for tripping, now all I see is dead cats.

Second, we go to the bazaar. There are so many booths. I am so excited I see lots of different kinds of boots in so many colors and styles. This is a good day, there are so many more boots than I have ever seen at the bazaar in my home city. After finding a couple booths with styles I liked I asked for a size 10. No luck, I try a few more, still too expensive or no size 10s. I go to the last booth and ask for a boot in a size 10. She legit says to me, "Size 10 (or in this case 40 b/c it's europe) no I don't have that, seriously, go to a store" awesome. So no luck in the shoe department.

After that, Linnea and I went onto the street where there were three men dressed up in furry costumes. One as ALF (yes the 80s tv show puppet), one as from what linnea tells me the squirrel from Ice Age and the other as spiderman. I'm not sure if any of you know this, but I do not in any way appreciate people dressed in furry animal costumes, masks freak me out and I don't know what they're thinking or doing and I just don't like it. I've found that furry people can sense this fear and thus always come after me. I hate this. Alf snuck up on me and I ran away like a three year old child scared of santa. They were trying to pass out puppet show tickets, but i was not having it. Oh well, we did have a nice time at the cafe afterward.

Let's see that's life for now. My final week. A lot of tests etc. coming up. My final lesson with my favourite 6th grade class. AND other awesome stuff. I'm looking forward to seeing everyone at our swearing in retreat in Kyiv and I'm sure that all will be well and happy. I'll try and post just once more before i leave Nosivka or Kyiv in case of no internet at teh site.

OK, so an update a tad overdue. Well, here we are in December. What has changed? Not much. We're all off quarantine now so it's back to the grindstone of language class, teaching class, teaching sessions, our community project (which went off yesterday!) and any other thing they decide to dump on us.

I am happy to say that I have made wonderful friends and am getting along quite well with my host family. I have enjoyed another thanksgiving abroad, for which (with the help of others of course) I made a full thanksgiving dinner, minus gravy because we didn't have any drippings from our obviously free range turkey. As I told my mother, free range is the only option. I try to cancel out the bad environmental policies of Ukraine with the good ones. No one is near as wasteful here as in the US. For the most part, it's all locally grown food, as everyone pretty much supports themselves in the vegetable in fruit department. Everyone composts. And most people walk or bike wherever they may be needing to go.

Beyond that, the redo of our kitchen and most of the downstairs of my host family's house is almost finished. This is great because it means there's a chance that I won't have to stare at topless women as I make my way down to the bathroom. Apparently, Ukrainian papers are filled with topless ads which are now littering and protecting the woodfloor of the bottom floor of teh house.

Ah yes, my host mother and I have had many great conversations over the past few weeks where she has begun to joke with me. A couple days ago when there were no lights and I went into the root cellar to find a jar of pickles she joked with a friend to close the door on me and then she said, "bye bye kari!" Thanks Nina, you're a peach. Actually, she makes me laugh a lot and I am pretty happy to have her around!

In the boring department for you and exciting department for me, I finished my interview and will soon find out where I will be placed. By soon I mean, I'm actually leaving in two weeks so I have to find out where I'm moving because I can't live here anymore. They tell us three days before we leave for our new site where we are to live. Again, I said this before I leave. In peace corps, I know pretty much everything that's going to happen it's just a matter of specifics like where, when, etc. These specifics are very important to American life, and I'm learning to live without them in my life here. Also, in my interview I stressed I wanted to be somewhere creative and so I'm hoping an art like school pops up my way. Harder to place us TEFLers in some ways. Specialized schools in arts etc, like the YD people get generally also don't specialize in English and thus don't need us. But I really would like to be somewhere with some kind of art or music program. Drawing albeit corny and middle school pictures has become a great stress relief here.

The highlight of my day, I received a package from my parents containing wool socks and another containing Emergen C of teh raspberry variety. I consider this a small victory over the Ukrainian mail system which I'm not going to lie I have a hate hate relationship with. I appreciate teh fact that it gets mail out and all but my thoughts on pricing and effectiveness have yet to be addressed. I don't plan on changing this, but it's one of those things I'm finding harder to adapt to.

So that's that, a small post about nothing really at all. Oh yeah, I mean, I'll probably post pictures before I leave this city as I won't necessarily have internet at my new site, I'll work on it. I'm slow it happens!

love and hugs