Okay, so before reading, keep in mind that I am super on my own here and in true need of companionship, so before you tell me I already have a dog in the States…well just don’t. I love Bailey, but she would never cut it here, so I must improvise…thus introduces Suga, the new love of my life. Suga is a white and brown maile tamaiti (puppy) who now resides, flea-free, with me She came from a friend in another village and currently weighs in at 3.5 pounds. She consumes a diet of whatever dog food they sell at Farmer Joe (currently of the Ocean Delight variety) as well as these chewy strips that she is convinced come straight from heaven (I think she actually hid one somewhere outside, and it reappeared days later). She was born in late November and is currently about 2.5 months old. Her favorite place to sleep is in my laundry basket or on the floor (like a true Samoan puppy), even though I made her a nice bed in her own laundry basket, with blankets. She barks like she might die when I pull her food out for supper and she is currently in a fit of teething, and mainly on me. Her name, Suga (pronounced soo-ngah), is the female version of “Hey” in Samoan. (Fun Fact: she was originally named Sole, the male version of “Hey” because I was told she was a boy…then we found out she was a girl.) She slept with me for about a week, until she peed in my bed once and that was then end of that. She will not walk on a leash (she just sits down and chews on it) but she will follow me anywhere I go, without fail; people think this is hilarious. She only listens to Samoan, though I am trying to get her to be bilingual. She loves riding the bus with me into town and is great at lying down at outdoor restaurants while I dine. She is a super easy dog, after having a beagle, so it is nice. My little brothers and sister here love her. They always ask where she is and if she is sleeping (apparently that is all she could be doing). She would really love you if you sent her a toy from the States because they are all but non existent here.

Well, I have to be honest, in the first week of school, I wasn’t sure I was even going to be able to learn these students names, but I did. In the second week of school, I was convinced there was no way I could teach math in another language, much less learn to read the curriculum manual which is in Samoan, but I do now, everyday, and I just finished reading the entire unit lesson for this week, all in Samoan. Even today, I wasn’t sure I would ever be able to get the students to understand that balloons can be used as a learning tool, but then they turned to their “globes” and started referencing the continents. It was magical (and yes, currently I am also teaching Social Science).

This has been the most intense 2.5 weeks of my limited teaching career, of my slightly lengthier educational career, and even of my life. As I walked home from school today, soaked through my pulatasi with sweat (it was another SUPER hot day in the tropics), I began reflecting on exactly what our class has accomplished in the past 2.5 weeks, and this is what I came up with:

1) Though we have absolutely NO routine (a schedule for the school day couldn’t be finalized until all the teachers are there…so finally today the missing link showed up and tomorrow we will have our schedule), the students have learned that when I clap, they repeat, and then they are silent…that took two weeks.

2) We have a behavior management plan that is working. There are fewer students’ names on the board each day for misbehaving. There are fewer students out in the hallway for hitting. There is just generally a lot less of me telling them to stop. They even tell me when someone hits them, instead of returning the hit

3) The classroom is finally functional, as in they know where things are, I know where things are, and we both know when things aren’t in their correct place. It is wonderful!

4) The classroom is finally semi-educational. We have a word wall, some verb tense posters, a space to display their artwork, maps of the world, and their own personal additions. It is still a work in progress, but it is getting there.

5) Though there is no routine with lessons, there is routine with the bathroom/water situation. I no longer hear “fia alu i le toilet” (I want to go to the toilet) and “fia inu se vai” (I want to drink some water) 35 times a day. Instead, we go twice, all at the same time, and that is it. They no longer ask. Peace

6) About a week in, I found out that six of my students don’t know the sounds of the English letters. They can write them better than I can, but there is no connection to their sound. I gave a spelling test on Friday, and those six students just strung together letters that looked interesting (but I have to be honest, it was funny to read…though I know I’m horrible for thinking that). BUT, in light of this whole situation, I have arranged tutoring for these six kids after school, and I am finally using that phonics book that we purchased during my time in the School of Ed.

7) Similar situation in math: some of my students have trouble adding four digit numbers, well some of them also have trouble adding 9 + 5, so these kids also get individual tutoring after school and now 4 more of them get it.

8) On a personal level, I have become excellent at taking notes on students and assessing their different levels and using that to figure out what I need to teach, so on some levels, I feel like a real teacher, which is exciting.

9) The students now raise their hands quietly and only the fewest of them shout out my name or call “lea!” (here!), which is so exciting, because 27 students barraging you with “lea! Tesi!” can be super daunting and overwhelming.

10) We finally, on some level, get what group work is about and that all people participate. We are still working on it, but the phrase “I lou vaega…” (in your group…) is no longer met with blank stares Exciting!

11) There are some students in my class who can truly draw, and wow, is it impressive. Just being able to watch that happen as a result of my assignments is really cool.

12) Many of these students have come alive in the classroom. I don’t know how their class has been before, but to begin with, I thought I would have trouble motivating many of them, but after some simple, solid praise, about 90% of them fight for it. (I won over one more today. He didn’t turn in his homework the first 2 weeks of school, but today he not only turned it in, he also mastered 4-digit addition. It was intense!)

Looking back over this, I realize how much I have learned about these students in the short time that we have spent together. I realize how important I am to their day…I spend over 6 hours in a room with them and control every aspect of that. They are an awesome bunch of students. They speak slowly for me in Samoan because they know I am still learning. They have started speaking more loudly, because it helps me to hear and understand them. They clean the board, sweep the floor, put up the chairs, and hand out materials the second I ask (sometimes they even fight over who gets to do it…a pleasant change from other classrooms that I have witnessed). They are beginning to care about one another, protecting one another from the older kids.

It is no transformation, for sure, but it is certainly a start. Soon, I will begin teaching the English and Math for the year below my current class, so half of my day will be spent away from them, but I really think we have gotten off to such a great start that the rest of it will fall into place. The greatest challenge has been trying to convey the importance of what we are learning and how much I care about them. In an American classroom I would simply tell them these things, but here, nothing is simple and there is certainly no talking about things like knowledge, love and respect, only because they are not yet in my vocabulary.

I honestly came to this thinking it would be easy. I am one of the most qualified in the program, even though I am only 22. During training I excelled at everything. But to be honest, I have never felt more inadequate, never felt more like I am not doing enough, and have never felt more like I am in over my head. It’s quite scary to think that you are here as an expert in English teaching, or even just as a resource, and you can’t even wrap your mind around what is going on in the school. It’s daunting, overwhelming and exhausting. It’s as difficult as teaching in America would be, only in a different language that I honestly don’t know that well. Go me!

I know things will work out and that is why it is helpful to look at the progress we have made as a class so that I know things are achievable. As I stand in front of the same student, explaining how to add 9 and 5 for the tenth time, it is helpful to know that we really are making progress, even if not in that particular moment. I am excited to see where they are at the end of the year, compared to where they are now. I think back to when I first arrived at site in December; it was the final day of school, the day of their prize-giving. It was so exciting to see how well the students had done, and it will be even more exciting to see them there, doing that, after I have been with them for a year, knowing that I am that much more a part of their lives. That is definitely something I look forward to.

Quite literally this is what I have been doing lately...it has oficially been raining for four days, and non-stop for the last 24 hours or so and it is not letting up. The rivers are super high and there has been flash flooding all over Upolu (not sure about Savai'i), but it has been super intense. I feel like I am always wet and so much for doing laundry because it never drys...grrrr. But, rain does mean that when the pipe is off, we can still collect water for showering, laundry, and cooking. But oh, how I miss the sun! It is actually super cold here now, because of the rain, and by super cold, of course I mean like 70 degrees, instead of 85, but I never thought I would be cold...but now I definitely miss that long sleeve shirt that I didn't pack.

School starts in one week. What does that mean? Well I'm not sure exactly. I have been told that the first week is for students to clean and prepare the schoolgrounds and for teachers to prepare their lessons, take registration of students, and the like, but we will see soon enough. I hope that spending some time with kids will help to remind me of exactly why I am here and what I came to do. But surely soon enough, I will be trying to keep my head above the metaphorical waters of teaching in a country where I only marginally speak the local language. I expect it will be difficult in ways that I have not yet even imagined, but hopefully also very exciting.

The other part of our program, village development, has already been and continues to be super overwhelming. There is so much that the village wants me to do, but it all involves a lot of money, so that means a lot of grant writing and now work right now, but hopefully soon enough, that will change.

Anyhow, miss you all back home and I hope things are well!

Every morning I wake up, as I take a shower in my wooden box of a shower with my little trickle of water, I hear a pig squel before it is is then subsequently shot (and this is 6 in the morning mind you). Then I get out of the shower and immediately start sweating because even at 6 in the morning, it is hot as blazes here. I walk back across my family's compound to my little house where I get ready for the day and I continue to sweat. After my breakfast of cereal or pani (bread), I begin the arduous job of trying to get to know people in this village. I begin walking around at 8 or 9 and won't finish until 1 or 2. As I arrive at a neighbors house, I greet them in the formal way "Malo lau susuga. O a mai oe?" (Hello sir. How are you?) They respond fine, and then it gets awkward because they do one of two things at this point. They either a) start speaking in all Samoan and so I just smile and nod until they expect to respond and then I just look at them cluelessly or b) they ask me if I'm married and proceed to suggest a possible husband in the village for me...which they think is hilarious, but is honestly getting super old. As I finish visit 5 and my 5th cup of koko samoa (samoan hot chocolate, made of rich cocoa and sugar), I am soaked through with sweat, so I decide to return home for a little malolo (rest). I reach my home and am greeted by my 12 year old brother who inquires "What's up?" as I have so lovingly taught him. I take a rest (how VERY Samoan of me), and then cook my dinner. At 7pm, my family has Sa (prayer time) together, where we sing church hymns and pray everyday. My dad then asks about my schedule for the next day and jokes lovingly about how my Samoan is coming along, but the OTHER "Peace Corps" (he is talking about a Korean graduate student also in my same village) is so much better. I hang out with my 4 year old sister, some much needed "girl time" for her being the only other daughter in my family. I then call it a night and head on in to my room for the evening. After reading another half of a novel, I turn out the light a drift off to sleep to the wonderful sound of monsoon-like rain for the 5th night in a row.

So that about sums up my daily life. Throw in 5 church services over the weekends and copious amounts of Samoan food then as well, and you have my life. It's fun, interesting, challenging, and frustrating. There is so much more going on that just this, but it also feels this simple on so many levels as well.

So if you are feeling like you really love me and want to send me stuff...here are some things you could send to brighten up my day, but really anything would rock.

-Stuff kids would like: stickers, glue, tape, kids safety scissors, colored pencils/pencil sharpener, paper, picture books, inflatable beach ball world globe, etc…

-food (protein laden and chocolate will cause tears of joy)

-Photos (of you, you with pets, places/vacations, etc…)

-A jump drive with music and podcasts (even TV shows and movies!) on it (if from iTunes, include your username and password so I can authorize use)

-Movies/TV Shows on DVD

-Music on CD

-Pictures drawn by you for me to hang on my hut wall

-Vegetable/tree/flower seeds (make sure it’s something that does well in Samoa’s climate)

-M&M’s, Skittles, and other candies and chocolate

-Sugar-free minty gum

-Tea bags/ instant coffee (Starbucks has an amazing instant type out now)

-Nuts/Trail Mix

-Crystal Light or other drink mix (preferably sugar-free)

-Jiffy Pop popcorn (you know the kind you put on your stove and it pops into this big bubble)

-Granola bars

-Energy/protein bars

-Nutella

-Non-refrigerated cheese (Velveeta, parmesan, Hickory Farms, www.barryfarm.com sells powdered cheese to make sauces)

-Non-perishable condiment packets (Taco Bell sauces, ketchup, mustard, soy sauce, etc..)

-Spices (cumin, taco seasoning, pesto sauce, Ranch powder, etc…)

-Any kind of food that will keep and is easy to prepare, but doesn't have to be baked

So I am writing these blogs way after the fact…sorry about that, but you know how things go. So here I will attempt to catch up a bit, which means I’m going to give you very little about a whole lot.

My family:

Malama- The most wonderful Samoan girl I have met yet, she is one of my best friends, and I really think she will end up with me in the States one day. She is so smart, so kind, and everyone thinks the world of her. She really understands what it is like to be a palagi, and she hands-down, has been my inlet into truly understanding the culture.

Molly-reminds me so much of Carley, it is ridiculous. She sleeps in late with me on Saturdays (and by late I mean 7 and not 6 in the morning). She is a social butterfly and will grow up to be an amazing leader one day.

Kalolo-I really love this kid. He is so freaking adorable and funny. It took him a couple weeks, but when he finally said “Malo, Tesi” (Hello, Casey) to me when I came home from school one day, I nearly melted. He loves to dance with me, like serious dancing, even though he is five. He can sleep nearly anywhere.

Afatia-At age 8, this boy already dances to his own drummer. He can be quite the cheaky boy, but over my 6 weeks in Manunu, he definitely chilled out a lot. He became so sweet and helpful, with just a little positive reinforcement.

Tuiuli-My 25 year old brother, who could not be more amazing. He is super protective of me and often lectures me about how he cares about me and worries about me when I walk alone at night. He is married and has a one-year old son that he loves to death. He totally takes care of me and always checks on me when I have a bad day.

Tala-I don’t think I could love this 19 year old brother any more than I do. He is hilarious! He lives by his own rules, which include drink as much as you want, whenever you want. He and I became really close while I was there as I counseled him through his girl troubles. He is so much fun.

Vao-He is the black sheep of the family, but only in the sense that she is so different, because he is loved more than anything. Everyone loves this boy and he reminds me so much of some of my friends back home, that it’s ridiculous. He is always the life of the party and always has a smile on his face, unless I’m leaving and then he starts crying, which in turn makes me cry like a baby.

So those are my siblings at my first family in Samoa.

Other random tidbits:

-the first Friday in Manunu we had a fiafia (celebration), where we danced Samoan and palagi dance. It really became a chance for some guys in the village to dance with all of the girls, which became rathr hilarious. This fiafia was followed by another, and then by a “Crabbers Dance” (Crabbers is a night club in town, known for being notoriously sketchy, but the cousins of the owners live in Manunu, so thus the venue). There were two “Crabbers Dances” and then they were shut down because too many sketchy guys from other villages started coming (though I don’t know why we even had the second one because after the first one, a guy nearly got banished from the village for 10 years for starting a fight with a taxi driver who was trying to date the guy’s sister. But anyhow, they were fun…for the most part.

-during training we were also having meetings to determine our site placement. We had a meeting with the Country Director and Assistant CDs and then filled out our preferences. Following this, on the Friday before our site visits, we had “Bid Day!” I have never been a part of Greek life, so this is the closest that I will ever have come to it, but it felt just like it. They called us up one by one (slightly different from you every day “Bid Day”, but we did have prefs and the feelings were all the same, I promise). They announced that I would be in Apolima-Uta and though it wasn’t my first choice, I was certainly happy.

Manunu is certainly completely different from my home in America, but it definitely has filled a huge place in my heart which was created when I left the States. It really Is a home away from home.

In Samoa it’s not often typical to eat breakfast in the early morning. Normally people go out and do work until 10 and then come in for taimi o le ti (tea time), so when my little brothers started eating breakfast with me (and using a fork!) my dad thought is was appropriate to establish the idea that they too were Pisikoa Samoa (Peace Corps Samoa). It was hilarious and it stuck with them every day since then.

It was the first day of training (or a’oga, school, as the Samoans would refer to it), and think back to your very first day of school, you had on your new clothes (probably jeans and some awesome new top), your new backpack (probably a small over the back number or if you were really cool, one of those side packs with only on strap), your mom and dad took pictures, there was some fanfare and then you walked to the bus, got on and went. Now, imagine you are in the middle of the tropical bush somewhere (and unless you have actually been to a tropical climate, you really have no idea what that looks like, but think green…everywhere). It is hot already at 6 in the morning when you awake, so you are already sweating, so you jump in the icy cold shower (which will eventually become natural to you) and remove the sweat and dirt accumulation from the night or sleeping. You then dawn your newest lava-lava (think sarong and skirt) and a matching top (if you can really match the tropical flower design that covers your lava-lava). You eat a delicious breakfast of fried fua moa (eggs) and fried panikeke (pancakes)…noticing a theme with the fried things? Yeah…you can fry a lot of different things, I came to learn. You then announce to the world (in broken Samoan) that you are going to school, so your mom and dad both rise and walk with you on the 15 minute trek through the bush to your “school” (really, it was the church hall). As you leave them, you get a kiss from each and a “Manuia le aso” (Good day), to which you respond (culturally insensitively…of course, because you haven’t really started training yet) “Ioe” (yes). You love them already!

Such was my first day of training in Manunu.

**Preface to this entry…as a kid, I always wondered what it would be like to grow up in colonial times when they weren’t allowed to do anything on the Sabbath. Now, as I live it, I realize that it’s not really that cool…actually kind of boring, but you learn to find ways to “cope”, if you will.**

So my family is Mamona (Mormon). What this means in Manunu is that you get to go to Sunday School and church for three hours every Sunday morning, beginning at 8am. When you live a 30 minute walk from the church, it means that you have to leave at 7:30am. And if you want to arrive dry, not sopping wet from sweat, it means you have to leave around 7:15am so you can walk slowly. But I was lucky enough to be able to catch the Mormon truck, which means I got to ride in the back of a pick-up truck most of the way to church. It was great!

Church was a blur and would be a blur every Sunday there after (mainly because it was in Samoan, but also because I don’t really get Mormonism, but to each their own). After church, we were invited to Sunday To’ona’i, which is a big meal on Sunday eaten with a whole bunch of people. It is a really big deal in Samoa and sometimes families come from all over the islands to eat to’ona’i together. During lunch, we were served all sorts of Samoan food, as well as supageti (similar to Spaghettios, but no in “o” form, which we would come to find out Samoans think is really delicious as a Panini type sandwich). We were also served moa Samoa (Samoan chicken), which one of the other PCVs proceeded to eat eat and then cried as she broke one of the bones (to which the Samoans responded in typical fashion, meaning laughter, because they didn’t get why in the world the palagi (white person) was crying…talk about cross-cultural misunderstanding). I began to laugh because the entire situation was hilarious and so we all just laughed, even the other PCV when she realized how comical the whole thing was.

Later that afternoon we watched Bring it on! (even though I would later find out that Samoan Mormons aren’t supposed to watch tv on Sunday afternoons…woops!). I found it hysterical that my Samoan family liked this movie (as sadly, it is also one of my favorites). Many of them knew the words/lyrics and one of my brothers would even attempt a move every so often. It was amazing!

That night, I taught my family “Spoons”, which I now consider the very best card game ever, due to the ridiculous bond it allowed me to form with my family. It is simple enough, that with my very limited Samoan and serious numbers of gestures, I could explain the rules with little need for translation. We played, probably for nearly 2 hours, and with my entire family, which included cousins and friends, and at some points was as large as 12 playing the game and numerous others watching. Those were the most intense moments of my life…seriously, and they beat me every time!

Manunu is our training village and has quickly become like a home to me. When we first arrived, we were greeted in typical Samoan fashion, which means a huge ava ceremony. As we sat in the open fale (house) with all of the matai (chiefs) of the village, we each responded in turn, “Lau ava lea le Atua, soifua” (This is your Ava, God, good health). After the intense and extensive ceremony, everyone began to bustle around as the women of the village finally came into the fale and we were assigned to our host families. We felt like kids getting picked for dodge-ball teams, “Who would be last? Who would be get? That lady looks nice; I want her!” It was a relatively short process, but when my name was called and my mom presented me with an ula (flower necklace) and a kiss on the cheek, I was immediately enamored and super excited. We walked out of the fale and back to the bus that we had come in to get my things. My mom, Masina (meaning month or moon), is the strongest woman I know, as she carried my immensely huge bag all the way to our house in the bush. I remember thinking that it was the longest walk ever (who knew that later on I would appreciate the time spent walking home alone after training so much). My dad, Siosi (George), met us half way and helped my mom carry my things (he is also insanely strong), as well as my little brother, Afatia and a cousin, Fa’afetai. They took all of my things to a absolutely beautiful fale o’o (a small fale used just for sleeping), which my mom had decorated with different colored pieces of fabric sewn together. It was absolutely beautiful! I then met everyone (whom I will describe in a later entry), but they also (in typical Samoan fashion) fed me lots of food.

Later that night I played cards with them (a couple Samoan games, that since then I have become semi good at). I also gave my little brothers some punch balloons which were immediately blown up to their largest capacity and then hung from the clothesline so they could be used like a punching bag. It was awesome! As the evening came to a close, I began, what would become a nightly routine, of getting ready for bed around 10pm. My sisters slept on the floor in my fale o’o to keep me company and make sure I was safe. The first night was certainly not a relaxing sleep; there were bugs, and we all know how I loath bugs and the roosters crowed at 11, midnight, and again around 4:30 or 5 in the morning. It was ridiculous, lacking of sleep, but I maintain that this place would soon become home, no doubt about it.

So, we have officially been in country for one week...I made it, one week! Woohoo! Immediately after the Ava ceremony (see the last post if you are confused), we had an emergency evacuation for an earthquake that occurred near Vanuatu (also in the South Pacific, but to the west of Samoa). It was intense...literally our first day in country and we were already learning evacuation procedures from experience. Needless to say, no tsunami ever came about over this way, so after spending two hours at the Country Director's house, we were able to come on back to Apia and the hotel and begin our first official language lesson...and let me just tell you, palagi (foreigners) were NEVER meant to learn this language.

Let me begin by saying that Samoan is an absolutely beautiful language…everything about it makes you think tropical paradise and beauty, but the language is certainly not easy to learned. It is filled with diacritical marks (not sure what that really means in English, but there are ' and stresses used to guide pronunciation). The vowels are completely opposite that of English, so it's a matter of retraining your entire brain to see something and associate it with something else that you didn't originally. The "g" is also superbly difficult to pronounce, as it sounds far more like the ending of "tongue", instead of the g in "go" which is what I am used to. But such is life and I am certainly making progress.

This weekend (and Monday) I went snorkeling on the reef near Apia and then at a reef further to the west (and get this…the third time was actually part of our training…I actually had to learn to snorkel as a part of my job…haha, how sweet). There were insane numbers of fish, so brightly colored…you really don't believe it until you actually see it, but I really can like walk to the beach and out onto the reef and look at these fish every day. I also saw this amazing, electric blue sea star…intense. Everything here is just to an insane extent.

During my third snorkeling expedition, we also traveled around the entire island of Upolu (pronounced oo-poe-loo). This included travel to one of the most beautiful beaches where the water was turquoise and warm, across a mountain, covered in lush vegetation, and also to the south eastern part of the island where the recent tsunami hit. The devastation in that area is absolutely insane. Samoa has grown into an amazing country over the past decades, and this tsunami makes these areas look totally devastated, like they don't even belong with the rest of it. People are living out of tents and have signs up asking for help and support. There are no words to express the sadness felt by the people and those who witness both the loss of beauty and significant loss of lives (which is up to 146 now). As I write, tears come to my eyes thinking of the recent funeral we witnessed for 12 people from Apia whose lives were lost to the tsunami. Even in the sadness though, there is beauty. The Samoan people come together during these times of need, demonstrating even further the supreme beauty of family love and devotion, as they support one another, financially, emotionally, and physically at this impossible time.

On a happy note, Sunday was the holiday known as "White Sunday", called such because everyone wears white to church. This holiday is really cool because uncharacteristically to Samoan culture, on this day the adults wait on the children, doing the washing, cleaning and making of the food, while the children prepare the church service. The service was awesome. I went to a church that had around 120 children (look at those mad-sweet estimation skills, Mom) from ages 2 to 16 who sang and performed Biblical skits for nearly two hours. They were amazingly adorable and wonderful, as were the adults who welcomed us warmly to the church and Samoa.

This week has been filled (already) with intensive language training, as we prepare for a 4-6 week (not sure which yet) village stay where we will be paired with host families who will help us integrate into Samoan culture. I will miss the staff of the hotel (who have become like a semi-extended family to us because they answer ALL of our ridiculous questions), but I will be amazingly excited to get out of the capital and see the heart of Samoa. Already we have experienced a loss, as one of my favorite PCT's from our group gets ready to head home to get her health checked on. It will be a devastating loss for me because she is an amazing person, friend, and role model…so I will certainly have some coping to do over the next few weeks, but hopefully finally being in the village will help me do that.

Well...after three plane flights, tirelessly packing and unpacking at least 10 times, a 9.5 hour flight, two ridiculous days in LA and meeting some awesome people along the way...I am finally here! We arrived in the dark at 4:45 this morning, but guess what...it was still HUMID! After spending an hour or so trying to make our way through customs, the 23 of us made our way to the exit of the Apia airport to be greeted by Peace Corps Staff full blown with the most beautiful, tropical and sweet smelling leis imaginable. We then walked outside to be greeted by a brilliant blue sky as the sun was just finishing rising and palm trees surrounding us. We were packed into a bus and made the 45 minute trip to Apia, which (let me remind you) is right along the coast, so we drove next to the beautiful Pacific ocean the whole way! Once in Apia (the capital...pronounced ah-pee-ah), we checked in to our hotel (which has air conditioning...crazy), had breakfast (fresh papaya and coconut...delicious), and were given time to unpack.

After far to little rest time, we then practiced for the Ava Ceremony. This is a traditional Samoan ceremony for welcoming visitors to the village...essentially, it is accepting them as a member of the village. Essentially, everyone comes in, is introduced as the sit in a semi-circles (visitors on one side, facing the hosts). The Samoan PC Staff led the ceremony, so they spoke lots of Samoan...which is beautiful, but I understood very little (though they did reference Obama at some point). Each person is then served Ava (a drink made from the Kava plant...it tastes a little like mucky water, if you know what that tastes like) one at a time and consumes it as they thank God and say cheers. That is the part each of us got to do, so I actually spoke Samoan for the first time (and I wasn't even that horrible, if I do say so myself).

That is all for now, but know that I am safe and very excited about everything to come. I will update as often as I can, but I can't promise anything at this point! Love and miss you all:)

After the earthquake and tsunami in Samoa on Tuesday, I (as well as many others) were concerned to know if it would affect my travel to Samoa as a PCV. Today I finally received an email from the country director quoting that the number of deaths is over 100 and many others are injured or homeless. My work in Samoa will remain similar to what I originally expected, but now it might also include a fair amount of relief work in addition.

Coming to Samoa after a natural disaster like this one is intimidating, but also very uplifting to know that so many people are already coming together to begin relief work there and that I will soon have the opportunity to be a part of it. I guess now that something like this has happened so close to my arriving, I am more prepared for it if it happens again.

Four days till I leave!!!

Thursday I finally received my staging information and then on Friday finally booked my flight. I will be leaving Monday, October 5th, first flying to Philadelphia and then subsequently to Los Angeles where I will meet everyone from my group. Facebook has been a godsend (sadly enough) as it has meant that I have finally been able to get into contact with a few people from my group so at least I will know some names and faces when I arrive...a little bit less scary. I'm slightly nervous about the fact that I have heard that the average age in the Pacific is older than me, which means some of the other volunteers may very well have had significant experience with what we will be working with in terms of literacy training and community development. That being said, I am also really excited to learn everything that I can from them to do everything that I can while I am there...so there will be lots of learning for me.

I have been waiting to leave for so long (August was a REALLY long month here in RVA with the parents...), but now that it's less that a month away, I feel like there just isn't time to do everything and see everyone that I want to. I did so much packing when I first got home, but now I have just stopped, so I really have to get to it again and quick. Becca is here this weekend (which has been amazing!), next weekend I'm headed to Chapel Hill and after that to Michigan. I feel like I am going non-stop, but there is no other way to get everything done that needs to be done and to see everyone that I really want to see.

It's scary to think that in 22 days I will be leaving for LA and in 23 for Samoa! AHHHHH! Still so nervous, but so excited!

It is officially one month until I leave for Samoa! AHHHHH! I haven't received my staging packet yet, so that could change, but not by a whole lot. September means saying good bye and it began this weekend with Julian and Sarah. We hung out around Richmond, rock hopped at Belle Isle, and went to King's Dominion (new rides...it was great!). Seeing friends from Carolina made me really nostalgic, but also helped to me realize that I am really leaving...wow! I feel so nervous, but also more ready as each day passes and I prepare more.

I was excited to hear how their senior year has begun. We had so many great conversations and I know now how much I miss being surrounded by "housemates" of my own age. It was fun to see Richmond as a tourist, and also just to "see" it as I haven't spent much time there over the past four years.

The next month will be filled by creating memories like these. I am excited to see everyone, but I also find myself truly restless as I wait to leave. I'm ready to go...just one more month!

This is a Wordle that I created from my first motivation statement. It speaks to my hopes, dreams, thoughts, fears, etc. about enlisting as a Peace Corps Volunteer.

As I prepare for a two year adventure which will take me to so many places I have never dreamt I would see, I feel it is important to look back on the path that got me here. Following in the blogging footsteps of one of my favorite UNC friends, Beth Coleman, I write this post. After receiving a teaching position at her favorite school Beth began her own blog and wrote, "I know there will be challenges, hang ups, tears, frustration, uncertainty and so much more this year. But my hope in writing this is that when those things make their way to the surface and I want to complain, I read this and remember how badly I wanted this, and how much it means to me." I, too, feel it is crucial that I document the ridiculous journey that this future endeavor has already been and the very emotional process that got me to where I am now.

This experience for me truly began over a year ago as I served as an intern in Uganda, Africa. Working closely with a Peace Corps Volunteer there and having many insightful conversations with her, it was the first time that I had ever truly considered the Peace Corps as an option for me. I had heard about it before, but watching her live it made it real in ways that finally allowed me to see myself there, doing what she was doing and loving it.

Once I returned to Chapel Hill in the fall, I immediately began looking into the Peace Corps opportunities for education volunteers, while I simultaneously began student teaching with the best possible mentor I could have ever been assigned. As I began student teaching I became aware of how much I loved teaching, how much I loved working with students, and how much I loved being challenged on a daily basis.

During my senior year, while student teaching, I was also going through the process of applying for Peace Corps (it’s quite extensive and if you have any questions about it, feel free to ask me). By February of 2009 I was nominated to the South Pacific, which was surely not my first choice, but I certainly wasn't disappointed with the nomination either. I began the even more extensive process of medical and dental evaluations in order to finally be cleared for service and receive an invitation. Throughout this whole process I was also applying to and interviewing at schools in DC for a teaching position in the fall.

In late May, I received both an offer to teach 3rd grade at a single gender school in DC that I loved, as well as an invitation to serve in Vanuatu as a Peace Corps Volunteer (PCV). As I waivered between these two options, I also began teaching at Student U (a program for middle school students in Durham, NC). In early June, I decided that right then in my life I felt better choosing to teach 3rd grade girls in DC. It was a truly difficult decision, not only choosing to teach, but also choosing which school to teach at and as a result, I was left with significant discontent with my decision.

Everything was set for me to move to DC in August, but by mid-June I was rethinking my decision. I began to realize that if I chose to stay here and teach that I might never have the experience of living with the people of another culture which is something that had drawn me to Africa a year ago and was a desire that still pulled at my being (to be over dramatic). I began talking to some of my closest friends to get their input on the situation and to help me make this monumental decision and by the last week in June, I had re-opened my application with Peace Corps by submitting a new (and improved!) aspiration statement. I was told that I would here in two weeks, so I waited with baited breath to hear how my future would play out.

Three weeks later, we were nearing the end of Student U and each day I was waiting to hear if I would be re-invited. It had been a terribly long two weeks and after not hearing, I just assumed it wasn't going to happen. I was devastated, though I don't think many knew that, but I continued to hold on to a tiny shred of hope as I knew that PC often ran on their own schedule. One afternoon in mid-July as I was preparing to shut down my computer to leave Student U for the day, I decided that I might as well check my email one more time. As I opened my webmail account, I saw something from PC in my inbox. Assuming that it was just a generic message or update, I quickly opened it. It was a mere two or three sentences long and said that they were sending my invitation in the mail today and that I would receive no further invitations, so it was now or never (a little scary, but understandable- I had flaked once on them already). I jumped out of my chair and ran to the next room to find my family. I ran into Chris (almost literally) and threw my arms around him, "I'M GOING TO PEACE CORPS!" I yelled over and over, as he tried to calm me down enough to figure out what I was saying. I explained to him about the email and he hugged me, telling me how happy he was for me. Following that, texts and phone calls went out to those amazing people who had helped me make this incredible decision.

As I left Student U that day, I felt like I was literally as light as a feather and I felt so much anxiety melt away. I felt like everything was falling into place and I was finally doing what I was meant to do. I knew some wouldn't understand this decision, but I also knew that if they loved me, they would try to figure it out. I was thrilled, nervous, happy, and fearful, but I knew that after everything, I was finally doing something that would give me everything that I wanted in the next phase of my life.

Like Beth said, I know the next two years will be difficult (they don't call it "the toughest job you will ever love" for nothing). There will be challenges I cannot even comprehend yet, disappointments, failures, and loneliness. But there will also be success, new experiences, new friends to make and exciting adventures along the way. I know I will grow significantly and in two years, after living in the South Pacific, I will be a far different person than I am right now, and I hope that as I look back on this adventure up until now, I will remember how much I wanted this and how lucky I am to be where I am now.