So my trip to India has come to a premature though not unwelcomed or sad end. The crew and I have decided to cut our losses and head to Malaysia about 2 weeks earlier than planned. Originally we bought tickets flying out of New Delhi on November 12th directly in Bangkok. However, we all decided it would be a better decision to just buy new tickets to Malaysia and get out of India earlier. There are a few reasons why I am happy with this decision. Now I am no hard hearted, frigid person, but neither am I Mother Teresa; the zeitgeist of her time in this area. However, I think for my emotional well being it is better to leave a place that so openly profits from its suffering masses without any qualms whatsoever. Personally, I am tired and emotionally exhausted at having to be rude and almost downright mean to children and toddlers aged 2 through 12. This has been one of the harshest realities I have had to deal with here. No child should be alone on the streets at night by themselves begging from money or food to eat. No child should have to lie down on a cold pavement peppered with the fecal matter of all manner of animal and rodent from rat through horse and human. No child should have to be shouted at by any adult whose heart is being bleeding, who is trying to come to terms with the morals they have been taught and who is grappling with their conscience and the disparity between what is safe and what might be ethical. An adult who given the opportunity and right circumstance would help in any possible way, but who also knows that this is neither safe nor intelligent, since they would immediately be swarmed upon by dozens of other kids and permanently be on the radar of said children who roam the streets and could quickly turn to harassing, violent mob if not appeased. Hunger and desperation forces people to do certain things that most of the “civilized, cultured, above poverty level” masses would rather not think about. So these kids did what they had to do, and so did I. I kept my mean mug and used my most bitter, scornful voice dripping in distaste and condescension when saying NO , in the pathetic hope that the child would leave me alone so that I would not have to twice perform the ACT. No child should have to deal with this. It’s tiring , it’s exhausting and I’m sure wanes and detracts from the humanness of all parties involved. So goodbye to that. That I will never miss, and will hopefully forget with time. . .though I doubt it.

I will also not forget or miss the smog and pollution that covers India like a thick blanket. The eye burning, skin coating, allergy, sniffing, sneezing, coughing causing fumes that make breathing hard. Seriously how is it even legal to do this ? I was perusing my pictures of India recently and realized how many of them seem blurred, but not as a result of my camera lens but rather the smoke and smog that’s in the air. Today , we are staying at a hotel with a roof top restaurant and pool. I cannot even enjoy the stars because they are impossible to see even on a cloudless night. Yes it is that bad. Beautiful sunsets should not come as a result of toxins in the atmosphere.



Lastly, I will not be missing the number of accidents and bleeding people I have seen here and that is all I am saying on that matter since I would rather not call to memory those occasions.



Enough of the bleak no? So what will I be missing? The beaches! The warm , inviting waters of Goa and Kerala state. Ohhhh … they seem to call to you, day and night with bars and huts intermittent along the water’s edge filled with their expats, Diaspora and locals. So many fun memories. The food . . .chappattis, idlis, naan ( buttered, plain and garlic) , chicken tikka, tandoori, afghani, pannier palak , alu gobi, jeera rice, chicken biryani, papad, pampadams, shahi paneer, matar mushroom masala , paneer lababdar, navratan korma , dahl ( green , red, yellow and black) , masala chai tea and maybe a lassi plus all those other meals I can’t pronounce or never learned its associated name. *sigh* yes I will be missing this. I will also miss our long and sometimes eventful train rides. Just a few days ago, trying to catch a train from Jaipur to Agra we somehow got on the wrong train and went 4 hours in the wrong direction and finding ourselves in Ejmir hahaha. I will also miss asking someone the price of something , then dividing by 3 and subtracting 79 to find out the actual price I should be paying. I will miss arguing with said people who told me these prices. I will always cherish, being able to see the Bengal bay, the taj, the forts, the palaces , hearing the stories of the Maharaja and seeing histories in painting. I will miss observing this culture, the good and bad because I no longer think they are mutually exclusive. However, time passes and life moves on, moments become memories and future becomes the present, with that said myself and the crew will be in Malaysia soon and I’m looking forward to the memories I will create there too.

Love,

Dee

PS I'm too tired to proof this, read and forgive :)

This title actually has nothing to do with my post, it’s just what my life has been for the past 5 weeks or so, that, and writing, a lot of documenting, because I want to be able to remember this trip in the years to come. We’ve been in India since the 21st of October.After our 1 hour flight from Sri Lanka ,we landed in Chennai airport in the Tamil Nadu region of India aka the south. We knew we were about to move on up to the East Side when a real taxi on 4 wheels with AC, picked us up in a real car, that didn’t give us whiplash every time it changed gears. Woooo! were we excited to not be sitting under each other’s armpits in the back of a tuk tuk. I suspect I was especially happy because I have always felt that if I could kick a vehicle over with one Chuck Norris roundhouse kick, then I am much better of walking! No?! do you agree or do you agree? Eh? OK OK * . About 4 hours later we got to our final destination. We were finally at the home of Aunty H, who is R-Wheezy’s relative (side note R- Wheezy’s family has more cultures and races than a United Nations Summit meeting, it’s quite spectacular and wonderful!)

Anywhooo I was glad we were finally there because really I’m tired of flirting with death in the cars of these drivers. However I learned quickly that driving is as bad in India as Sri Lanka if not worse, and I was in a fender bender in Sri Lanka ! YIKES! Other than that it is simply beautiful. After a 2 day rest, we decided to try our legs at Hiking up Mount Arunachala with Vijay ( a friend of R – Wheezy’s aunt ) at 5 AM in the morning to visit the Sri Ashram Ramanasramam where the guru Ramana Maharshi lived for many years.. Mt. Arunchala can be found in Tiruvanamalai which is an important Shaivite town where Shiva is revered as Arunachaleswar (an aspect of fire). There is a proliferation of Ashrams around here and many Sikh and Buddhist followers, foreigners and locals alike. Those who have surrendered and reject all attachment to the material world, those devotees who stay in no place longer than 3 days , those who are looking for enlightenment and even those once regular travelers who came to this place years ago for a visit and just never returned to their home towns and countries. These are the people we meet. This is why I travel.

Anywhooo I digress, back to our 5 AM morning exercise. While hiking up and down the mountain (which satisfied my exercise requirements for the next 2 months I think.) Vijay who is very learned and also quite possibly the most hilarious version of an incorrigible 68 year old man I have ever met, regaled us with some apocryphal, some religious and some historical stories and anecdotes. I think he was trying to drop some knowledge on us, but not in the avuncular way of a condescending, highly educated, intellect but rather as a friend trying to enlighten. For example, here are a couple of my favourites :

A woman is speaking to Vijay and asks “ Do you meditate?”

Vijay “ No I don’t meditate”

Woman “ Why?”

Vijay “ Because if you need more than the 6 to 8 hours of peace and quiet you get while you sleep at night then that’s just greedy!”2) Woman “ Do you pray?”Vijay “ No I don’t pray, because if he doesn’t know my needs better than me then he is not worth praying to.”

Something to think about huh? Let those marinate y'all. There were quite a few others, many much more interesting and mind twisting than these, but I’ll save those for my personal collection and drop one every now and then on you guys .

After descending the mounting we went to the tea shop to have our usual, traditional Indian breakfast, of dosai ( a flat fried bread), idlis ( a steamed something of some sort) mint and coconut chutney, coconut sambol , dahl and some other crunchy stuff on a banana leaf. YUM YUM ( my apologies, I just realized I usually don’t know what I’m eating, all the same it’s all delicious, I’ll work on that.) I’ve been practicing eating with my hands too, which is very common here and completely the norm even in hotels and restaurants. I still have problems scooping the rice, mashed with my fingers into the dahl, to my mouth without it dribbling down my chin. But hey, you practice and you learn and when people look at you and double over with their guffaws you learn even faster. That’s just the way it goes. After our breakfast, we dodged , ducked and prayed our way across the street while sidestepping the cows, the bulls, their poop and tuk tuks that all seem to want to engage pedestrians in a game of ‘Chicken” We get to the tea stall where we fall into chatting with an apparent non local (turns out in the past he lived up at the border of India and Burma. Another traveler who never made it back home. He’s a photographer who almost gave up photography (how tragic that would have been!) He’s facetious but not insulting or rude. After a little bullying he loans me his camera so I can scroll through his pictures, after all, he’s a published photographer so reason states that he inevitably has dozens of beautiful eclectic and artistic photos. WRONG! His camera memory is empty and he doesn’t even have an SD card. So, I decide to full his camera with some the scenery around us, the tea man, the random pedestrian and my friends. You only have one chance to capture one moment in time and then it’s gone like a whisper, lost forever to the present. Anyways after some banter he claims he’s going to put it on his website. I thought “yeah believe it when I see it !” J True to his word though . . . (check it out http://devgogoi.wordpress.com/2011/09/27/peace-corps-is-50-years-young/ )

Following this Hari met us at the tea stall and we all went into town. Parx ( who I shall now call our guy traveler and friend) , R Wheezy and myself visited the Arunchaleswar temple , built during the 11th century, which covers approximately 10 hectares of land. Here both Parx and R Wheezy got blessed by an elephant. You place either fruit or money in your hand which the elephant takes with his trunk. He eats the fruit immediately and passes the money (both bills and coins) to his handler seated next to him. Then he pops you gently on your head with his trunk and you are blessed.

After the temple we meandered back through the streets to the store where we left our shoes. It’s not strange to see people wonder about barefooted, which now is not strange to me either since even in Dubai we saw business men going to work in sandals. But, nevertheless just so you can picture it in your mind, to my Trinis : It’s like walking around Frederick or Charlotte street barefoot , Californians : It’s like walking around San Francisco, Tenderloin area without shoes, North Carolinians : It’s Durham without shoes and to my Armenians it’s like Yerevan ( Toumanyan st) without shoes. You get the picture? Good! Footwear secure on our now pitch charred feet, we walk to Trishull’s hotel to have some of the cheapest and most delicious Indian food of my life!

Some people say you either love India or you hate it passionately. Luckily I have fallen on the brighter side of that spectrum.

PS the day after I wrote this we went to Puducherry , locally known as Pondi where I saw a larger than life sized effigy of Ghandi and the bay of Bengal. India has been beautiful and good to me.

PPS Mom sent you a post card from Sri Lanka, not sure if I put enough postage. Let me know if you got it. Love you

Sincerely,

Dee.

“Traveling is a brutality. It forces you to trust strangers and to lose sight of all that familiar comfort of home and friends. You are constantly off balance. Nothing is yours except the essential things – air, sleep, dreams, the sea, the sky – all things tending towards the eternal or what we imagine of it.” – Cesare Pavese

Girrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrd yourrrrrrrrrrrrrr LOINS!! It’s going to be a long post.

Excuse me miss , EXCUSE ME MISS , Let me tell you one thing!!

I would just like to start this blog post with something I have figured out thus far during this trip. Panhandlers, street vendors, taxi folk and restaurant hounders in Turkey lovvvve to harass you. Now ,that in itself you cannot fault them for because it is their job and how they make their money. HOWEVER, one would think that after you have said NO for the 57th time that they would take a hint, because no one, NO ONE can be that OBTUSE! If they don't then I cannot be held responsible for my follow up actions. Now I don’t like being rude so I have started to take PRE-EMPTIVE measures ! Have you ever realized how people quickly stop talking to a crazy person? Seriously, just act crazy when you are being harassed! It’s amazing! ORRRR what R-wheezy and I have also found useful is speaking loudly to people in a completely different language. Why yes I might look like a speak English, BUT I am going to answer you in a completely different language and then proceed to have a conversation with you in that language, and you may or may not participate in said conversation, why? Because you have been harassing me with your “ Excuse me misses , can I tell you one thing” and your “HELLOS” and your “ Wait a minute , I have good deal for you” , but no, I don’t want to listen to you anymore , I’ve heard all the ‘one things’ you could tell me and when you said “Hello” I said “ Goodbye” but since you won’t stop I am going to act crazy. I will have a few ‘one things’ to tell you in a language that you can’t understand while my voice raises a few decibels , starts to sound like a cacophony and my eyes roll to the back of my head and I dance like I’m having some kind of fit, and you will stand there and listen to me. Why? Because now it’s my turn to tell you one more thing.

So here’s the main course , what’s been going on since Fethiye? A couple days after my last post R-wheezy and I packed our back packs and took our very tanned selves to Selchuk where we couchsurfed with Aydin the owner of a carpet shop. The owner’s of these carpet shops are trying to keep alive that art and style of weaving without outsourcing it to underpaid, starving children. The patterns are absolutely beautiful and hopefully a couple of them will grace the walls and floors of my house one day because the talent needed to create them is unbounded. While here we also roamed St.John’s church and the ancient city of Ephesus with its marble streets and columned alleys adorned with old, chiseled marble and stone sculptures. Sometimes I wish for magic powers. Mine would be the ability to touch something and know its history. I always get this craving when I walk somewhere with a very distinct and rich history. You wonder what gladiator walked in the same steps as yourself at that moment, or slave or Caesar lost his life in this town and why? You wonder about treasons committed, love found, stories and histories created. If you are like me, you always want to know more. Hence the quoting which heads this post by Rene Descarte

After Ephesus, R-wheezy and I hightailed it to Bergama. Here we celebrated Eid while staying at the Athena hostel which was an old Ottoman building that had been restored. We were awakened every single morning between 4:30 and 5:00 to beating drums, loud megaphone singing and the call to prayer. I finally figured out sleeping with my earplugs was my best bet to sleep in late. While there, we visited the Red Basilica, Dilikili beach (Aegean Sea) and Akropol. In all of Turkey and even more so along the coasts it seems that everyone uses solar panels. Seriously even the farm houses and what seemed to be the not so well off people had 2/3 solar panels installed on the roofs of their houses and even motion sensor lights to conserve energy. How come we don’t do that? Are we really so unwilling to front the money initially because we fear minor inconveniences and a minor decline financial gain? We will not be here 100 years from now but at the rate we are consuming our resources without replenishing, what will be left for our progeny?

From Bergama we took the midnight bus from Izmir to our friends apartment in Istanbul. Just so you know I would always recommend the Kamil Koc bus service to anyone traveling by land around Turkey. They’re great, friendly and very reliable. In Istanbul where we met up with the third of our traveling Trio we had our last fill of Doner kebabs, fish sandwiches, I caught a case of pink eye ( YEAH I did!! ) bought some scarves, saw the Hagia Sofia, the cisterns and Topkapi Palace where I saw the worlds 4th largest diamond that was made into a ring. Seriously, this ring was the size of my palm. How would one subtly show off a ring like that? There was nothing subtle about sultans back in those days. Them, their harems, and clothes that looked big enough to fit giants. To anyone that cares Turkey is one of the most beautiful places I have been to. I would recommend that everyone visit if provided with the opportunity. I am certainly glad I did.

Dubai – Everything is big and overdone here. Everyone drives an SUV. Palm trees grow where they don’t belong. There are skating rinks, waterfalls, zoos and aquariums in malls. Can’t say I’d do it again.

PS pics to come soon.

Yours TrulyDee.

We have been in Fethiye since the 20th and we leave tomorrow for Selcuk. Having lived in the Post Soviet Caucus region for the past two years I have repeatedly heard people talk about the beauty of Turkey. Not once did I consider that they could be understating the fact. Turkey is all the good things I heard it would be . . .PLUS SOME. We stayed at a hostel right in the center of Fethiye about a 6 minute walk to the pier and a 15 to 20 minute ride to really good beaches. R wheezy, the boys and I were only able to grace the beaches with our presence once this time around. The rest of the time we spent * drum roll* . . .getting OPEN WATER DIVING CERTIFIED!YYes ladies and gentlemen R wheezy ,Bop and I are now Scuba certified for open water. Let me tell you guys how this came about . . . It began 2 months ago, in a far away ,mystical land called , Armenia. R Wheezy is surfing the internet trying to plan out our itenary, then suddenly turns to me and says " Hey you want to get scuba certified" Now R Wheezy is slick like that because at that very moment I was enjoying something called a cafe glace. This is a coffee drink , blended with vanilla ice-cream and drizzled with chocolate syrup over a dollop of whipped cream. She knew at that very moment I would say YES to anything just to be left alone with my drink. That, and for some reason I don't hear too well when I have my sun-glasses on like I did because it was a sunny day , and when that happens I usually just nod my head and pretend I heard. So that's how I got roped in. . . Flash forward 2 months.. .

I am putting on a wet suit and pulling up from the knee because it's wet with salt water and sticks to my skin. It's my final dive today and I 'm wondering to myself how many jelly fish are going to sting me this time, if my face mask will fill up with water again, and if I'll have to exhale into them so that they might empty or if my awesome instructor will suddenly and unexpectedly yank my regulator ( oxygen source) from my mouth in order that I might learn to be prepared for emergency situations. I'm also stressing that at 18 Metres / 60+ feet under water I will suddenly panic, realise I am out of my comfort zone, thrash my way to the surface and then die from decompression sickness or exploded lungs. Hmmmm . . . I get into the water and we begin to dive, it's quiet down here * dammit* I just got stung, 1, 2, 3 times and that last bugger got me on the lip oh well , these don't hurt to bad ( like stinging nettle). I'm relaxed, we go deeper, I have to equalize and my ear pops, I find my neutral balance and all is well, 18 Metres, 19 Metres, 20 . . .and I smile. I am not panicking and I am not bleeding from any orifice. I have more air in my tank than anyone else and I am at ease. We complete the dive after we've seen a sunken boat, some 1000 year old pottery , some grasslike fields , some coral and 4! ARGGG that last jelly just HAD to get that last sting in ( if only I could see those transparent gremlins before I swim into them). We ascend and I take off my gear . . . weight belt, flippers, BCD and disassemble them on the boat. On our return back to shore my instructor hands me my diver card stating I'm certified, after scoring our tests and shakes my hand. I then realise . . .OH SNAP YALL!!! I AM A CERTIFIED DIVER!! who woulda thought!? great times , excellent experiences with lovely folk , thanks R wheezy .

Sincerely,

Dee

Hmmmmm I don't quite know how to put my first day/ night out of Georgia into words. . .hmmmm let's see. So I'm traveling with R wheezy who is a girl, P wheezy ( who is a guy) and let's just call this other guy Bop. So Bop , the two wheezys and I rode the train from Yerevan all the way to Tbilisi, we got in at about 1 AM Georgia time . And went directly to our couchsurfer's house. Now when you read someone's couchsurfing profile and they say " something is definitely wrong with me" in their profile description then usually to most normal people that would be a red flag ( dot dot dot) HOWEVER to. . . four travel hungry , expat, ex-PC volunteers , newly released into the brave new world, this signals, a fun, exciting night full a great and new experiences. . . OK I digress, we got to our couchsurfers house, called him, he pulls up in a car about 5 minutes later,tells us to drop our stuff we are going out to a crazy place where all the weird people in Georgia are ( that should have been our second red flag, but no beause we are some troopers) so we get to the afor- mentioned place and YUP NO SIREE BOB he did not lie to us. 4 hours later after , a mildly amusing and extremely disturbing night , R Wheezy and I decide to grab our stuff and throw up the two fingers. So we did. Though we had no idea where we would be resting our heads that night , we knew for dang sure it was not gonna be couchsurfer no# 1's house. AWKWARD table for 1. Thanks. Later on R Wheezy and I found a hostel that let us sleep on their floor with cushions included for free 99. I honestly think the owner just saw the panick stricken look in our eyes and decided it would probably be safer to just let us in than have us running around town knocking down doors at 4 AM in the morning. Anywho, we're on our way to have some khajapurie while we ensure we do not run in to couchsurfer no#1 .

That's the way she blows. Sometimes she does and sometimes she doesn't. Will try to post pics later.

Our life is an apprenticeship to the truth that around every circle another can be drawn; that there is no end in nature, but every end is a beginning, and under every deep a lower deep opens. -Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Well, well, well. . . As of 12:00:01 AM this morning I officially became a Returned Peace Corps Volunteer, better known in these foreign aid and expat circles as an RPCV. 27 months have been completed and it is my turn to leave Armenia. This morning I sat with Rani, Vinnie, Erin, Chris and my mother downstairs at Envoy hostel. I realized that except for Rani, Vinnie and I, ALL the other A17 volunteers from our group have already left. Yeah, we've said our goodbyes, had our last get togethers and our final drinks but because of the slow trickle out of people it never really hit me that these people were leaving, probably never to be seen again for a really long time. Of course I am certain I will run into a few who have the same aspirations and life goals as I do where International Aid and Foreign Development is concerned but it will not be a time like we've had here ever again. Later on we'll all be in our work suits, with our families, running our businesses, trying to get reports in on time, managing our employees or being managed ourselves. It'll never be us, hanging with the villagers, chilling in Yerevan at jazzve , or the hostel, kicking it at the vernessage, speaking Armenian and Russian, singing some Tata Simonyan, drinking black coffee straight up or eating out of desert dishes, doing the akbher squat while we chew sunflower seeds, taking the sweaty marshutni rides where the tatiks are afraid to open the windows because they swear by the matsun that we'll all catch colds and die. It'll be different. So different. Many of us have opted to do extended trips. I don't think we are , all of us, quite ready to let this life go.

I know my Ajan is probably right now sailing on a boat through greece, Jsu and Coeman are already in Georgia, others are in Thailand, some have made it back to the US and are doing road trips, yet others are in the Balkans or left just this morning to fly to Germany and Prague. So what will I be doing? Well here's how that story starts. I am in the process of my Foreign Service Exam. Already leapt over the first hurdle and passed the written exam, I just submitted my PNQ's (personal narrative questions) and now will have to wait for about a month to see how I do. In the meanwhile Ranijan, Parks and myself will be traveling East.

I will be taking the train to Tiblisi, Georgia on the night of the 17th where I will be spending only 3 days since I've been there before. On the 20th I'll be flying out to Istanbul, Turkey and then taking the bus to Bodhrum where I'll be getting my diving certificate. During that time I may or may not take a boat to Greece and take in Santorini , Kos and 1 other island. Next Rani , Parks and I will be flying into Sri Lanka , where we will spend 3 weeks until we leave for India on September 24th. We'll be there for 6weeks hanging out at Ashram's and other temples, trying to find peace in our restless, too young souls .Rani's aunts live there so it'll be a fun time. On November 12th we fly to Bangkok, Thailand and seeing as we haven't bought our exit ticket for there yet, we don't know how long we'll be there.

Thus my blog will go through a Peace Corps reflection and recollection transformation and become more of a travel , off the beaten path blog. We'll be trying some vlogging and also load more pictures. I'm sure you'll enjoy reading of any faux pas to be committed and all the mistakes I will undoubtedly make. For those of you who stuck with reading my not too timely updates and sent me messages facebook, I miss you all too, and I'll be home, at some point , maybe even in 2012. :)

Dee

John Ruskin

In order that people may be happy in their work, these three things are needed: They must be fit for it: They must not do too much of it: And they must have a sense of success in it.

Too true, right now I'm sitting at the apartment in Charentsavan. We got done with rehearsals for the swearing in of the new volunteers about 3 hours ago. I was selected to be an MC of sorts for the event with Mr. Nick Hutchings who is currently sitting on my left strumming away on his guitar, while wearing his fedora. If you knew Nick , you would know this is not at all an uncommon sight. He NEVER EVER puts that guitar down and travels everywhere with it. I've had a pretty good run this summer working with the new volunteers, working in our GLOW ( Girls Leading Our World) camp , and also just hanging out in my village. I don't think I ever officially stated that Peace Corps is one of the best decisions I ever made in my life. It's left me more grounded and more secure in many of my decisions. When that bell tolls, and my times up, when i get on that plane and i look back, I don't think I'll have anything but pleasant memories of this place. Of course I can't wait to go see my brother, his wife, my nephew and nieces in Australia or to sink my toes into the sand on Maracas Beach, Trinidad or to see all the changes I've missed in the pass few years, but , this is one decision i will never regret and Armenia and all the experiences I've had here will always have a special corner reserved in my heart right next to my love for curry crab and dumpling and fry bake n' shark yummm :)

I can’t believe, it’s been 1 year and about 2 months since my arrival to Armenia. Time is racing with the speed of light and I think time is winning. I seems I only blinked once, laughed once, had one meal and already so much is past and so many memories are made. Most of the A16 volunteers have already left, this will be me next year. I don’t even think I’m ready to think about that just yet. Just yesterday I was looking at all my pictures of captured moments and still events from my time in Armenia, everything from the first horovats I ate, the first speech I gave to a group of Armenian speakers, the first class I taught, the first wedding I went to,the first time I left my family in Arzakan, my first day at Bella café in C-town, the first time I pretended to weed my yard so my neighbor would see me and insist on doing it himself because I’m an ahchik and all my countless, splendid nights in Yerevan; unbelievable, where has time gone to hide? I’m now friends with the lady at Bella, even her son has a picture of me on his computer, I always have a place to stay when I’m in Arzakan, I can say I have family in Yerevan, I know where at least 7 pre 11th century cathedrals are located,I don’t absolutely need to have a microwave, hot water, a shower, tv dinners,a French press,Starbucks, or a restaurant on every corner of the city I live in,I can argue with the best of the taxi drivers, I know now I can survive on very little, I can wash 2 loads of clothes with 3 buckets of water,I can survive a scorpion bite, I can have my own horovats, I can… not shower for 5 days and still be presentable for the public, I can hold conversations in Armenian,I can sleep on any concrete or wood floor, I won’t get an anxiety attack if I don’t know where I’ll be laying my head the next day, I worry less, my neighbors can show up at my house and I’ll have tea, coffee and sweets ready to go, I’ve been a camp counselor and an educator, a neighbor and a friend, I’ve given some but received so much more and . . .I’ve changed.

I stopped blogging because it became hard to negotiate what I should put online and what I shouldn’t and rather than try to balance all that I wanted everyone to know with what should be held in my own confidence, I opted to keep a private journal. Reading it yesterday was like watching a timeline of my own growth. The spectrum of emotions I went through in the time was like riding a rollercoaster except then I couldn’t see when the loops that would throw my upside down and leave me hanging for days at a time were coming, until, I was caught in them. Hindsight has revealed so many lessons to me. I’m much more patient and tolerant, the hazy sketch I had for my future is so much more definite and concrete with all the brightest colors you can imagine, and it makes me smile to see where I’ve come from and where I’m going. I understand myself more as an individual and I know my limits and ooooweeee that’s an awesome feeling.

The new A18s will have their swearing in a few days from now and I’ll be there for that. Guaranteed , I’ll be taking pictures like it is going out of style because I want them to be able to preserve these memories too and I want them to see how much they have grown 1 year from now when myself and my fellow A17s are leaving. Hahaha I’m the older , more archaic generation now, there’s so much irony in that. I wonder if this is what it feels like to get old? One day you just realize it? and you realize that you are now a more seasoned individual. If it is then I had an awesome dress rehearsal because I already have a lifetime of awesome experiences to keep my nostalgic, day dreaming mind occupied for some time to come. Ah well . . .ais kan 

Love Danyajan.

As for my updates, as you can guess, a little more of a process for me to get internet now. I will try my hardest. Love you mom and have a safe trip again hehehe ttys. Chrissie, shout out to you and I'm still alive and nah I don't need anything...yet but ask again in a month lol and Linda be safe on your trip you rebel you, I know I owe you an email.I'll get there eventually lol

Ciao

Love Danya

My forehead is sunburned now,and the patterns of my chaco sandal straps are permanently tanned on my feet. Lala was right about this...the sun is different here; brighter ,hotter.They say this is where noah's arc landed. Maybe that's why the sun shines so... maybe it's a special place , so the earth shows favor and shines brightest here...hmmm

Anywhooo...

I drink tea all the time now, my new family doesn't own a cow, so we don't make our own cheese or butter (no more arm muscles for me). It also seems that they don't drink milk. It's ok though because in Cali I picked up the habit of drinking tea all the time, and I do mean all the time.so it's not so difficult now when I go for days and what may be weeks without milk...what I would give for a tall glass of it though...(My firstborn maybe...hehe j/k...kind off)

Right now as I write this I smiling because I am watching and listening to my host mom shout to her mother who lives across the river.Of course it would be a simple matter to just call on the phone but how weird is that? Phones are rude here in small villages of little over 500. It's like calling ur girlfriend who is sitting in the same class with you to ask her if she did last night's home work because you need to copy it :) haha don't lie! Some of you have done that! Don't make me have to call names! You also don't walk through the village with your ipod on, you don't talk on your cell and ignore people on the streets and u certainly say 'barev dez' or 'bari or' to all the females you pass by...at least in my case. I don't speak to the men,mostly out of concern for my 2 year reputation in the village than anything else. I have nothing to fear here.

As you have probably figured out by now, I am all sworn in and am a bona fide PCV :D . There was a ceremony at the Charentsavan (or what we call C-town as pct's) Music School. In attendance was our Madam Ambassador (whose name I will not butcher by attempting to spell it without research) and our host families (God bless them because months of listening 2 grown adults attempt conversation with the language capability of a rock must be like fingernails on a chalkboard). Also there was our country director,all the training staff,Armenian media and the A16's were out in full force to conduct their own private initiation of us A17's after the formal ceremony (said initiation will not be discussed ...here). Highlights from the ceremony included Kyle's speech which had a short prose on Dave Boggs eating butter that he thought was ice-cream and the entertainment this provided for weeks for the locals hahaha (see when you can't read Hay you depend on pictures. Have you ever noticed how a picture of creamy butter looks like ice-cream??) Seriously though, Boggs lives two villages away from me and families in my village knew this story before I did. There was also a skit put on by another village that I guess was meant to portray the Armenian resilience to any strife and their ability to find happiness in anything. But, most importantly there was a song sung by yours truly along with about 12 other volunteers speaking of brotherhood and survival and pride in ones nation. Actually I'm not really sure about all of that because I didn't translate the whole thing but I believe that's a pretty good gist.

After our ceremony we took pictures, then headed to our famous cafe spot. Here we let loose and relaxed for a few hours. We were volunteers and no longer needed to call our LCF's when we left and returned to our villages boooyah!! I said my goodbyes to the volunteers

I was closest too since I would not be seeing some, maybe for months to come. In all our cases we are not allowed to venture out our village and community for a month. Thus, those who are not in the same village but same community get to see each other,but for me...it's gonna be me,myself,I and the villagers kicking it.

I enjoy this most times when I'm all gung-ho about assimilating but I cannot tell a lie, it does make me feel isolated at times. Moreso, sometimes isolation from the familiar makes you feel homeless and lost,but it's ok because even though i'm a long way from nc and cali and an even longer way from Trinidad, they say home is where you lay your head. I'm at home in armenia now soon it'll be familiar. On a brighter note, there is a lot that can be said for language improvement when only myself and one other person speaks english in the village !

I start working 1st with the 1 school in my village on September 1st. It's the first day of school where the kids attend even though I have been there 4 days last week and every day this week already. The school is newly built and the classrooms are small. I was told today my 9th form has 9 kids and they are all lazy! We'll see about that,I will be REGULATING. For the rest of this week I am just going to try to organise some grant requests that I would like to write and submit,plan for projects with other villages,do some brainstorming on my secondary project and some research on the FLEX programs that allow Armenian students to spend a semester at a US school. Speaking of secondary projects, I am playing around with starting a spanish speaking club. There are at least 3 of us here who speak it well and it will be a good excuse for us to travel around helping each other plus it will be good to brush up and review.

As for my updates, as you can guess, a little more of a process for me to get internet now.

Once upon a short time ago the happiest peace corps volunteer lived in the tiniest village hidden among the mountains, bordering desert iran. If I wrote a story about my permanent site that would be my intro.

I am writing this during my 8 hour journey back from my permanent site. It keeps my stomach steady while my driver plays connect-the-dots with the craters in the streets and does loop-dee-loops on these mountains. It helps me to think too that the ride is only a little longer than the drive fran San Francisco to L.A. It would be shorter but we have already stopped a few times. Twice to eat and once because the taxi driver had a personal errand lol

My permanent site is a little paradise set in the middle of nowhere, and yes, next to Iran. there's a river nearby and every few feet you walk there's a fruit tree. The past four days I gorged myself on apricots,berries (red,rasp,black ,you name it). We have grapes ,kiwi,pomegranate and mulberries which I helped pick! Also there are peaches pears,apples and watermelon. I didn't think anyone would believe me so I took pictures to prove it!!

My little oasis is completely surrounded by mountains which will make for excellent hiking and rock climbing, I'm certain boredom will never be in my vocabulary. The second day I was there one of the village kids came to my house to meet me and take to a little pic-nic she and some other kids laid out for me in the middle of the street. I would be lying if I said I didn't almost tear-up. After we were done eating and their questions waned, I got a tour of their village, my village now. They identified every neighbour , friend and grandparent they thought I should know. The real tear jerker came when I realised word got around that I was out and about and every few houses I passed someone came out to give me a rose from their garden or just to say hi :)

They even took me to their neighbourhood bakery which is mostly just the downstairs portion of someone's house. I watched them make lavash and was given some to take home. I'm excited about my placement and I can't wait to start, mostly because everyone here seems so excited and willing to learn and happy for my help. One of the older kids repeatedly told me how ecstatic they were to have me because they had been waiting so long...(Oh God, don't let me dissappopint them...no pressure right :s)

The family I will stay with is magnificent. A plus for me since I have to live with them for 4 months before peace corps allows me to get my own house. (P.S. House b/c no appartments in village). The mother who is an azeri refugee speaks fluent russian and plays the piano so I won't need tutors for either yay! We have already struck a bargain where I will speak english with her( b/c she wants to learn) and Armenian with her husband and son while we work on Russian. Additionally, at the school where I'll teach ( my primary assignment) there is a volleyball court !! Byahhh !! And the director has already stated that he wants me to train the players so we can win all the competitions!! Wait it gets better ... The winters are not too bad (maybe -5) and they're shorter than the rest of Armenia because we r so far south. What else can I ask for?? There may be an angel I need to thank out there. I'm certain...

The third day I was there we drove along the Iranian border. At the time I wasn't sure if I was allowed to be there,but I am ...(I think) I would have taken pictures but it's not allowed. There is one point where I got a little nervous where we came to a checkpoint with some soldiers who may or may not have been russian b/c they usually guard the borders. I heard my host dad ask them if it was ok for me to pass and after staring at me 4 a good 5 minutes they let us go. Like I said , I wasn't sure if I should be there. Anywho I pulled my camera out from under the seat where I chucked it just in case and we kept it moving. From the beginning of next week I will have zero time for my life.Model school starts and goes from 1-5 every afternoon (monday to saturday) but I still also have language classes every morning from 9-12. We also have to finish our community projects and still keep up with all our other h-w and technical. It's alrigt though because next week is also 'Vardavar' water day. It's a religious holiday that stems from a time when people worshipped a pagan gd named asterisk. For this celebration water is a symbol of purity and cleansing.they say the more you get soaked the better your life will be. It' almost like a nationwide waterfight. I can't wait!! Some of the girls,cousins etc that I am getting close to said they will come celebrate with me. Hahaha they don't even know what's coming ( I have water balloons!! :o))

Well that's all for now. Hopefully I'll be able to post again soon :)

Love Danya

Originally I had another blog post written and ready for shipment.However, other events have since moved to the head of the priority posting line. Wednesday, was a big day for me. Why? I found out where my permanent site for the next two years will be. I should probably preface this by saying Peace Corps does not put a volunteer anywhere they may be in danger. That said, my new home for the next two years will be in the Syunik Marz but more importantly, I am a stones throw from the Iranian border. I am the southernmost volunteer as well as the first and only volunteer in my village. Not only will it be new for me but for them also. I am glad that Peace Corps has so much confidence in me that they thought I would be a good fit there. I am one and a half hours from the nearest volunteer and 4 mountain ranges and 4 hours from the next volunteer after that. The village itself is made up primarily of refugees from the Karabak war and most have been settled there for years. Since most speak Russian I will be able to have some1 tutor me which is a plus. Ben has also said he will teach me basic German so that should be fun too. A more intelligent person once said if you want to truly understand a people you have to speak their language and so I am learning.

Armenian's have had such a difficult life between their history with the Ottoman empire, the Turks and the fall of their protectors ( the soviet). Most people here reminisce on those days with a forlorn, distant look in their eyes,a mixture of longing for the soviet control, resentment for genocide and hate for their stolen lands. Every Hay (Armenian) has morose and dark story they can tell you, but you'd never know from that self determined, piercing glare inherent to all Hay.

Other than that language classes are great, I can use the past and future tense now so yesterday's and tomorrows are part of my life again. Every now and then we have a funny story as a result of one of us butchering the language , for instance one of us has been calling the village kids peaches. Lol what this person was actually trying to say was the kid was nice. Someone else too has been calling the weather delicious. Usually the blank stares or the uncontrollable guffaws clue us in on our gaffe. The only thing to do is laugh at yourself in the moment then ask your teacher the next day where you took a left instead of a right turn.

Love Danya.

In all honesty Armenia has taught me not to get attached to the animals i see here. Let me tell you a funny story , true story. A couple days ago i was out getting the cow with my host brother and on our way back we stopped to check out the eggs from the chicken. So he had me count them for him in Armenian and we made sure none of them were cracked or anything. The next morning though, i had eggs for breakfast and thought nothing of it. On the way back home though when i stopped to check the eggs again i was like ohhhh, 2 eggs are missing * light bulb* ohhh those were the eggs i had for breakfast nice. Except for the fact that i had already been thinking of the nice little chooteeks( chicks) that the eggs would turn into because we already have some.

Another funny story, so my tateek and i were chilling at my host aunts place and all of a sudden they send me off to pick cherries with one of the little kids. So i went.In the middle of the process though i decided i wanted to use the bathroom so i leave the kid and start walking back towards the house. I round the corner and the first thing i see is a baby cow's head . . .that is to say, the head and the body three feet away with my host cousin skinning it. UPCHUCK WEEEEEE!!! yup threw up alllllllll over the floor. I'm pretty sure they are going to ensure that i am no where near when they are killing any more animals.

next story, so we have 6 baby piglets... well actually now it might be 5 because we had a bbg yesterday and we had pig so i'm pretty sure we're one piglet short and i just don't have the guts to go count. Anyways we were having or horvats (bbq) and my host dad pours me some cognac. Now i don't know how many of you have had Armenian cognac, but sheeshhhh my word never again. My host dad and his friends polished of AT LEAST 13 shots each!!! and i kept sipping from the same shot glass . . .while my grandmother sat next to me saying drink drink. I also realised pretty soon that you get tipsy much faster here at the 6000 feet altitude. 2 or 3 beers could do the job easy.

Anyways next week i find out where my permanent site in Armenia is going to be. Hopefully nowhere near lake Sven or I am going to freeze. Also we are in the process of planning our July 4th celebration. I am in charge of games. So it's going to be volleyball ( OF COURSE!) and whatever else i can figure out lol but volleyball is a must. Well thats a wrap for now.

PS Linda thanks for the call, next time not during class so i don't have to lie and say it's my mum hahahaha, Mummy i miss and love you, Monica i hope Tahoe was fun and that yall got the big boat, i wish i coulda been there (did Alexis take my spot?) lol everyone else ciao

Dee

I am breaking today's blog into sections since I know it's an intense read. here i will pretty much describe what my days are like.

I have intense Armenian language classes from Monday to Saturday from 9 until 1:30. It's all about Armenian language learning. The days that i do not have language classes I am in one of the main cities which is Charentsavan for my tech sessions, where i meet with all the other folks from the villages and we discuss our projects.

After class I walk home by myself or my host brother meets me after school to walk me home. He is the sweetest, most handsome and gentlemanly 12 year old you will ever meet and rarely 'chars balla' which means behaves badly. As soon as we get home, if my tateek isn't milking a cow or feeding the pigs or chickens she calls to me " Danyajan, Danyajan, Danyajan nustee , nustee , uzoomes utel " which essentially mean Dearest Danya , sit down , are you hungry?" and then they feed me until i am near bursting at the seams. Thankfully both my host mom and grandmother are great cooks!! Usually i start off with a small portion on my plate since i know they are going to make me put more on it at least 4 or 5 more times, and i can only say "kooshtem" ( i am full) a couple times before i feel i am being rude. I then either take a quick nap or go meet some of my other site mates for a hike or just to wander around he village.

The other day when we were doing this some villagers invited us into their house for some surcht( coffee). They knew none of us spoke much Armenian but still it was the thing to do.We drank coffee, had awkward conversation and then left. Good times!! I usually then go home, do my Peace Corps homework and pass out. By the way, i am lucky enough to be able to shower everyday now. Some of my other friends . . . not so much. Most shower maybe twice a week if not less.undoubdtedly I am happy with my situation.

Next time i have internet access, i will tell you all about the squatty potties and the importance of aiming well :)

Hopefully it will be in about a week.miss you all.

PS Monica how was Tahoe?? Wish I could be there with you all :s

I've been here for about 13 days and already it seems like months have passed by. Let me try to break it down for you as best as i can from the day i left Philadelphia.

May 27th - 30th

Had orientation session and ice breakers with other volunteers with whom i will be spending the next two years of my life. I am excited about our group as we are all completely different and each bring something to the table. Everyone here seems to be very qualified in one field or another. I haven't met anyone yet that i think i will butt heads with and that's great because i have met everyone. Most of us range between lower 20's to about mid 30's but we do have a few more mature women who are wonderful by the way(Especially Sue who I adore because she keeps it real :D) The first two nights i spent in Philadelphia were great because Latoya came to see me and even treated me to last expensive American meal hahaha. Good times. I'm glad that the last face i saw was a close friend,and more so, one I knew from Trinidad. The last day in Phil was spent packing and once that was done we were all put on the PC bus headed towards JFK. I spent the ride talking mostly with Danny and Mike who are becoming good friends. Once we got to the airport we were a few hours early , so we decided to play frisbee. . .yes in the airport , where else?!

Austria

We left JFK for Austria where we had a 16 hr layover. luckily enough PC provided us with day rooms across the street from the airport. Most of us dropped our stuff , took a quick nap and then headed out for some food and exploration. The group i roamed with saw some fantastic churches. As soon as i figure out how to load pictures i'll set them up. I know some of you will enjoy the architecture.

June 1 - June 4th

The first few days in armenia were spent at the Hotel Academik. There really is no way to describe the rustic beauty of the setting. When my new friends and i were not stuck in intense language, safety and security, orientation or ice- breaking classes we were out hiking. the people here are polite and excited to have us here. I hope we are up to par for all that we need to do. It was also here that we were introduced to some Armenian dishes. No matter what the meal, there is always lavash on the the table which is the equivalent of roti skins or flat bread. There is also loleek (tomatoes), varunk ( cucumber) and lots of khunzor and banan ( apple and bananas) . Vodka too is a big thing here. Every two or three days i have to turn it down at my family's table by saying " che che chica ray lee" ( no no i can't do that).

The DAY I MET MY HOST FAMILY

The last day at our hotel was stressful for me. Moving to another country was never a problem. Moving to another country that is mostly homogeneous in ethnicity, does not speak english and then forcefully integrating into a family is a whole new story altogether. There was a big cultural session on this day. We were all separated into the villages that we would be staying at and then taken out to meet our families one group at a time. On our way out we had to dip a piece of 'hats' ( bread) into some salt and eat it as a symbol of accepting there hospitality. I was then escorted by my LCF (language coordination facilitator to meet my host dad ( whose name or village i can't mention b/c of PC security regulations) Anyways my host dad never even looked at me. He pretty much shook my hand, walked away and left me with my new 12 yr old host brother. GREAT!! just peachy!! I didn't know enough Armenia to speak to my host dad AND he hates me!!! I can't wait for the next 2 yrs (borderline crazy laughter) I was pretty close to tears, no kidding. BUT ... i was wrong!! when i got home he explained in baby armenian words ( the kind they use to speak to the cows here) that I was now his daughter especially since he has only had sons (3) .Apparently it was a cultural trust issue with him not warming up to me immediately. He is actually wonderful :D OTher than that , i have a tateek ( grandmother), papeek (grandfather) and 2 yerkbuy ( brothers) . The oldest brother is off in the army for 2 years since all men here have to go to the army once they are 18.

later that night we sat down to a lavish dinner, where there was alot of smiling and laughing. I bet I was such an amusement to the family with my few Hayeren ( armenian) phrases and my charade like attempts to communicate. All in all I've no complaints because Armenia is it's own little paradise and it's my home now for a while to come.

Cheers :)

P.S. Miss you mummy!!

The clock talked loud. I threw it away, it scared me what it talked. ~Tillie Olsen, Tell Me a Riddle

The more i think I have a handle on time and am getting everything completed on said time, the more time seems to want to smack me upside the head and scream "SIKE! GOTCHA!" Yesterday was my first serious attempt at packing. I've learned that no matter how you try, you absolutely can't fit 2 years of life into 1 duffel bag, 1 hiking back-pack and 2 carry-ons and whoever told you differently told a dirty, mean lie. I started ranking the heavier stuff on importance.

During those slow, indoor, 6 months of -15 degree weather,what's the difference in necessity between a portable dvd player that uses a usb or can work with my external, 400 gb hard-drive to watch hundreds of movies VS my thick, thick, black, down jacket??. Hard drive wins. NEXT! Flannel bed sheets VS English/Armenian dictionary . . . that's how i moved through.Until my wonderful mother saw my packing technique. Though she had only been a few hours of her flight from Australia,and complete with jet-lag my mom completely revamped my packing style. I'm not really sure how it happened but i now have at least 1 and a half years in that duffel bag, black jacket and DVD player included.

Continuing with the subject of time,I should say that I am happy to be committing myself to doing PEACE CORPS. The timing itself though was a little off and is seriously taking a toll on the stories I will have to tell my grandkids. I am missing 3 important weddings of some very important people in my life . I want these people to know that I love you all very much and wish I could be there physically ( and through photoshop that may be possible *wink wink* mansfie :). I wish you all well and your fairytale has only just begun.

Another issue that time has not been helping with is my Armenian language education. 30 plus letters in their alphabet and they all look similar. Why? Luckily enough though, the other PCV's ( Peace Corps Volunteers) who are in country have all said not to stress about the language. So for now that's taking a backseat. I am going to land in country proud of the three things i can say: Im annun Danya - my name is Danya, Barev - hello, shnorakaletyun - thank you. I plan an saying these three over and over to whatever is said to me , followed by a smile and a head nod. When in doubt feign understanding. That's it for now, I must go buy some seasonings and brown sugar to pack, apparently you cannot get brown sugar in Armenia. . .odd.

"I should like to spend the whole of my in life traveling abroad, if I could anywhere borrow another life to spend afterwards at home." — William Hazlitt

I don’t have much time left in California now. Time hasn’t been as much of a linear concept as a quantitative one for me these days. As of recent when I think of how much is left before I depart for Armenia it’s been along the lines of “ I will do my laundry 2 more times before I leave” which equates to about 4 weeks, or “run around the lake 5 more times” ;equivalent of 14 days, or “take a random trip to L.A., Tahoe, NC or what have you 2 mores times” ; equivalent of 21 days. It’s easier than counting down days because I’d take a quantitative 2 over a linear 14 anytime, it simply sounds better. I hope that’s not confusing.

The first question that most people asked me when they found out I was doing Peace Corps was "WHY?" Initially I could get away with a dismissive smile and flick of the hand and that 'tsk' sound i make, but pretty soon that lost it’s effectiveness and didn’t stop the questions. There are many reasons, too many for the 5 minute small talk or immediate gratification response people are looking for when they ask those questions. Sometimes though I didn’t want to think about an answer too long because then my brain might want to scream , blow a fuse and shut down ASAP, my armpits would sweat an ocean and I would pull out so much of my hair my hairline would rendezvous with my shirt collar. Why? How many trini raised folks you know in Armenia? Go on ,I’ll wait . . . The best and simplest answer I think though is just that ‘It’s different, it’s a challenge, it’s new, and I get to help others.’ Then again, I am only human and maybe inherently greedy, absolutely, I am the last and the only girl which would explain away the fact that I’m also doing it because of my love for travel, new cultures and new languages. I can’t wait for my first coherent, 10 minute, grammatically sound, conversation in Armenian.

As with some others Peace Corps is not an escape for me. my life is great, wonderful actually, and looking back on the past it might have even been charmed. No I was not born with a silver spoon in my mouth, and have been witness to much sacrifice and self deprivation by my mother. Nevertheless life was and is great, I did all I wanted to do and then some. The problem though becomes that rut you sink into when you become too comfortable and satisfied, even more dangerous is that stifling cloud of casual boredom that begins to weigh down on you. I refuse to compromise my happiness for casual comfort because I have learned that though not necessarily mutually exclusive, they are two different things. Comfort and happiness. I am comfortable with my life but not happy. An impending life of bored comfort bore implacably down on me. Not something I could tolerate. Anyways, so I’m packing my bags and moving to Armenia, practically the polar opposite of my current life and lifestyle, hopefully I’ll remain unscathed but still have tons of fun, body rocking, hilarious stories for you all.

Thanks for reading.

Comments are very welcome! :)

DEE